Chapter Text
It was a sunny summer day, the sun was shining brightly up in the sky and they could feel it was pleasantly warming their skins. There was a red and white square-patterned blanket beneath them and they were alone in the large open area. Mikasa could see the forest ahead of them – full of pine trees. All green and fresh. Everywhere around them covered with emerald grasses and colorful flowers.
It felt like heaven.
Mikasa smiled to herself as she turned to look at her husband. He was watching the kid who was playing by himself in front of them with soft grey eyes. The boy giggled as a few birds land near him, he chased them off and they flew away instantly only to come back on their previous spot – almost as if they would like to play too. Mikasa was stunned to see Levi smile, a gesture that was privileged to her alone usually.
She felt happiness and peace washed over her overwhelmingly that her chest hurt. She heard then their little son -who learned how to walk recently- trying to run towards them clumsily with his little legs, shouting to his father meanwhile.
“Daddy! Daddy come play with me?” he reached his baby hands to Levi and Mikasa was surprised to see that Levi did not even hesitate to get up on his feet in a heartbeat and walked toward their son - meeting him in the halfway. She smiled widely as she watched her husband grabbed their son’s hand and let him take the lead. He was talking to his father, saying something about the birds excitingly and he pointed a nearby one hurrying his father to rush toward it. Mikasa chuckled at the sight of them and throw her head back to look at the clear sky. It was so bright that she had to narrow her eyes. She couldn’t recall a time in her life that she was this happy.
She didn’t know how much time she spent like that but suddenly the sun hid behind the thick dark clouds that she had not seen coming. The effects of the absent sun showed immediately as the weather got chilly. Mikasa felt unpleasant shivering went through her whole body and she turned her face to the horizon from the sky. She expected to see her family but they weren’t there. A snake-like arm went through her stomach to her heart as she felt the anxiety started to bubbled up inside her. Standing up hurriedly she called her husband’s name.
No reply came.
She looked right and left trying to see Levi and their son but couldn’t manage to find them. There wasn’t any sign of them around. No indication that they were there. Ever. As if they ceased to exist. The thought gave her another shiver and she started to run toward the forest.
“Levi!” she called again and again. Always stopping to listen for his reply. Never hearing any.
She shouted her son’s name but again the only thing she managed to hear was the sound of the wind which appeared to get stronger every minute. She was surrounded by the trees that seemed so charming and peaceful to her just this morning – now they were only consuming her and kept coming on her way but she didn’t stop.
She continued to call over and over both of their names, her family’s names, but still there was neither a sign nor a sound from them. At this point, she started to run like a maniac. Suddenly she tripped over something which made her fall over. Her knee started to bleed but she barely paid attention. She raised herself on her elbows and turned to see what made her fall. Suddenly the whole world stopped.
She stopped breathing, stopped thinking even her heart stopped for a second. Everything seemed to get silent, even the wind that was roaring on earlier. Everything was dark and cold. She recognized Levi’s body. There was blood all over his white shirt. His eyes were close and his chest was perfectly still.
He wasn’t breathing.
Mikasa heard a scream which she later recognized as her own.
Levi was dead.
Mikasa woke up, jolting.
She was alone and she was breathing heavily. Cold, sticky sweat was covering all over her body. And there was a terrible pain on her stomach. Yet she recognized none of them. She jumped from the bed or attempted to jump since her movements were not fast enough as they used to be. Like nine months ago. Before she got pregnant.
She had only one thing in her mind. She needed to find him. She needed to find Levi. Still unaware of the pain on her stomach she found her way out of the room by clinging the walls, getting a lot of help from them. The nightmare made her feel light-headed.
The headquarters corridors were empty since most of the soldiers, her husband included, were on the expedition. Ever since they had learned about her pregnancy it had been decided that Mikasa could not take any part of those deathly expeditions and she had returned her uniform for an unknown amount of time. Even though she had a hard time letting it go she learned to keep her anxiety under control. She learned from Levi to trust her friends and their power. In every expedition, she sent her husband and Eren and all of her friends with a lump in her throat and she had to learn to suppress her desire to go after them. And it was okay even if she was still a bit bitter about it. It was okay because she would do anything to keep this child safe.
Until today.
The sun started shining on the horizon as she stepped out of the headquarters. The outside, like the inside of the HQ, was also empty and she was still clinging to those walls with her dear life. She was heading to the barracks when she realized somewhere in the back of her brain that two soldiers were running toward her. Only when one of the men hold her arm to support her from falling she recognized one of her hand went to grab her stomach. The other soldier started to yell for others to call Mike who stayed back as well because of his broken arm from the last expedition.
“L-let me go!” Mikasa wanted to yell at the soldier who was grabbing her arm in an iron grab to prevent her from falling, yet her voice came out so weak and shaky even she got surprised by it.
Yet there was no time to think about her weak voice now as she could see the barracks from the spot they have been standing. Just a few more steps and she could find her horse and took a ride towards the expedition area. She had that power in herself. She could do this – she had to! Her husband – Levi! She needed to save Levi. He needed him at the moment she was so sure of that!
With a newly found energy, Mikasa yanked her arm from the soldier’s hand with such a force that made him stumbled on his feet. She kept going to the barracks with both hands clinging the walls of the head-quarters for support. Behind her, the man tried to talk to her, tried to make some sense to her but she didn’t listen.
Levi!
Everything seemed to progress in slow motion. She heard someone else called her name and some footsteps running toward her but she felt like she was in a dream again. Her mind began to get even foggier than before and the only thing she could think of was Levi and her needed to save him. Suddenly she doubled up because of unexpected pain and she started to fall over.
It was as though she had blinked and the fog in her head was finally cleared out. The time started to flow as normal. She realized that she was on the floor and someone was holding her. She couldn’t remember whether or not she hit the ground but that didn’t matter at the time. There was another pain in her body that she couldn’t ignore anymore.
Her stomach.
“Mikasa? Are you alright?” she heard Mike asking her while keeping her arms to support her – her back leaned on his chest as apparently, he was the one that caught her. She was about to answer when she recognized something was leaking between her legs. Her water broke. She raised her head to look at Mike.
His eyes opened almost as wide as hers.