Chapter Text
Her feet tangle in the soft brown sand, while beats of sweat roll off her back. She lets the sun kiss her skin while the sound of waves crashing on the shore carry her thoughts far away into the distance. The beach is wide and deserted, none of her co-workers are anywhere to be found. It could be too early for the men since they stayed up until four last night, doing God knows what downstairs at the bar. She made it until 2 am when she started missing the comfort of her hotel suite and Kingsize bed with floral pillows and expensive sheets.
When the Voice had informed her of this coaches retreat, she was hesitant, to say the least. Recently divorced, a life that needed so much healing it was exhausting, plus leaving her children for a full two weeks were no small ask.
It was the first year the show was willing to invest such money into getting the new set of coaches located in a fancy hotel in Cancún. It had felt ungrateful to pass up on the offer, especially after Adam had sent her a lengthy email to convince her of why she should come.
The sand continued to cover her feet and into the space between her toes. She grew up with the beach so close it was basically her backyard. The sea had a way of making her feel calm. An Earth’s creation so huge, it made all her problems feel small and insignificant.
She sits down at the edge of the coastline, staring out at the miles of unknown territory. She unlocks her phone and scrolls through her photo gallery, smiling at the pictures of her children in there. One is of Kingston holding a large stuffed animal he’d won at the fair (or at least, Gwen did and handed it over to her oldest proudly). The other one was of Zuma sticking out his tongue while his face was covered with melted chocolate. There were a bunch of pictures of Apollo there too. He was too young to make silly faces like her middle child and not yet active enough to create the wild moments Kingston did, but looking at her miracle baby trying to make her laugh while making funny noises is enough to get her teary-eyed. She just hopes all three of them come out of this crazy time with the least bit of damage.
That’s the one thing she blames her ex-husband for the most.
No. She’s not gonna think about Gavin right now. She does enough of that when she’s back home. There’s a clear blue ocean laying at her feet, untainted brown sand surrounding her small body and the rumblings of open water carrying in the air around her. There’s too much good for her to focus on.
Hours could’ve gone by since she sat down and it honestly wouldn’t have surprised her. She thinks about what her kids could possibly be doing right now and she figures they’re probably driving her parents insane. She smiles at the thought while also feeling a rush of guilt for dropping them off at their house while she’s here.
She feels a sudden shadow blocking some of the sun and immediately feels a chill run up her arms. She slowly puts a hand over her eyes while her fingers press into her forehead. She’s blocked the sun enough to be able to look up to the sky and find Adam’s amused gaze taking her in.
“We looked all over for you in the hotel.” Adam says quickly. “Did you even sleep?”
“I came out here around nine, what time is it now?”
“It’s 1 pm.” Adam answers.
So she really has been here for hours. Adam must sense she’s being hit with that realization because he mentions it precisely.
“You’ve been sitting here for hours. We’re having some drinks and snacks at the bar. Care to join us?”
“Drinks?” She asks. “Already?”
Adam smiles proudly, throwing his hands up. “We’re on vacation. There are no rules. Now get your ass up off the sand and hang with us. I think Blake’s convinced at this point that you went home early.”
“Blake noticed?”
She had barely spent any real time with Blake, aside from the brief interactions they shared on season seven. They had always hit it off well though and she couldn’t deny that before signing up for season nine, the thought of seeing the handsome cowboy again helped significantly with signing the new contract.
“Yeah.” Adam continues to babble on. “We all did.”
He holds his hand out and helps her to her feet quickly. She brushes off the sand on the back of her legs and thighs while following Adam up to the beach bar.
She ties the floral kimono snugly around her waist as she joins Adam, Pharrell, Carson and Blake. They all make approving noises upon her arrival and Gwen smiles at how easy it is for her colleagues to make her feel warm and welcome.
“What can we get you, Gwen?” Carson asks.
She can tell that even though they’re on vacation, he finds it hard to let go of his job as the host.
“Anything non-alcoholic will do.” She smiles.
She catches Blake and Adam’s disappointed stares and laughs.
“It’s barely noon.” She rebukes.
The two man share a laugh and don’t push it any further and the whole vibe feels nice. She’s glad she didn’t pass up on this opportunity to come with them to Mexico as she finally starts feeling a little less like the hurt and damaged Gwen and more like herself again.
There’s a little bit of space left between her and Adam but it doesn’t take long before Blake stands up with his cocktail in hand and sits down next to her.
“You enjoying yourself?” He asks softly, understanding wrapping around his features. “I know you’ve got a hell of a lot going on back home.”
She thanks Carson when he hands her a blood orange mojito.
She takes a sip while looking at Blake and nodding. “I’m having a good time so far. I try not to think too much about the situation back in California.”
“It’s too beautiful out here to think about anything ugly.”
Gwen bites into the straw a little too hard as she recognizes that reasoning.
“I came to a similar conclusion.” She replies, her hand trying to smooth out the straw from where her teeth had bitten down on it slightly too forceful.
“I always knew you and I were the smartest out of the bunch.” He says while winking at her and the sight of it makes her throat just the side of too dry.
There’s a light bead of sweat on his forehead and for some reason it makes her that much more aware of the handsome features of his face. His curls are untidily scattered on the top of his head but somehow it works. She realizes she’s never seen Blake in anything other than his jeans and button-ups before, but right now he’s wearing swim shorts and a tight t-shirt that won’t let him hide his more than good physique.
It must be the lack of affection she’s experienced in the last year that makes her body react to him in such an unusual way. Blake has always been attractive to her, but when did she start taking notice of him like this?
“Did you now?” She responds, remembering she still has to reply to his joke.
“Gotta say, winning from Adam and Carson is not that much of an achievement. Pharrell on the other hand? That’s something we can brag about.”
She takes a few seconds to look at him and takes in his happy face. It’s unclear to her if he’s pretending or if he’s actually this happy. She doesn’t want to ask him about his own state of mind too much because she knows from experience how much it sucks when you’re just trying to be okay and people won’t stop trying to dissect that. As if recently divorced people are forbidden from even having the littlest amount of fun.
“Don’t be mean.” She smiles, sipping on her drink and enjoying the way the sun heats up her back.
“I was sad to see you leave last night.” He says, his dimples prominent on his cheeks. “I get it though. Being the only girl when all of us get shitfaced…. I wouldn’t wanna stay either.”
“I’ve been in a rock band with all guys for years, Blake. I can handle myself around inebriate and out of control men.” She teases. “I was just so awfully tired, I couldn’t wait to crawl under the covers and finally get some undisturbed sleep.”
Blake nods. “I don’t blame you. How are the kids doing?”
She smiles at the question. Most of the time people ask her that, it’s because she just ended up telling the story of her divorce and they can’t believe there are actually three kids living through that as well. Sometimes it’s just a courtesy question that she’ll try to answer as shortly as possible, because she knows people really aren’t interested in her mom stories.
Blake’s interest seems completely genuine and proves him to be different in so many ways.
“They’re holding up pretty impressively.” She replies. “They’re doing so much better than I am most of the time, it makes me feel a little guilty sometimes. They’re strong kids, that’s for sure.”
“They must take after their mom.” Blake says, holding her gaze. “Don’t feel guilty for having shit days Gwen. It happens, we all have ‘em. Your kids are doing well because they have you and they know no matter what, that won’t change. Take it from someone whose parents divorced when he was around the same age as them.”
“You know exactly what to say, don’t you?” She half states, half asks. It’s not sarcastically put either, the cowboy really has a way of wording things perfectly.
He smiles at her again. “I’m not just telling you what I think you wanna hear. I think we both have had enough of lies and deception, right? I wouldn’t do that to ya.”
“Anyone ever tell you you’re really nice when you try to be?”
She bites back a smirk but it’s useless when he lets out his huge belly laugh. She tries to cover her mouth when she bursts into laughter too, but quickly lets the sound out freely. It feels too good to have real joy enter her soul again after so many dark months.
“Thank you.” Blake says, semi-serious when his laughter has died down. “It’s easy being nice to you.”
“I wish more people felt that way.” She responds under her breath, not realizing how bitter and angry the words had come out.
This was another side effect of divorce it seemed; the everlasting mood swings. One moment she was laughing her ass off, the next she felt deflated and angry.
“Kick ‘em to the curb.”
She crooks her brow, thinking that maybe she misunderstood his words.
“Huh?” She asks.
“Anyone who isn’t nice to you…kick ‘em to the curb. Fast.”
Another giggle escapes her, the way his words sound in his accent making it even funnier somehow.
“If I remember correctly, I did.”
Blake lifts his glass in the air and waits for her to clink hers against it.
“Let’s toast to that.”
“Kicking assholes to the curb?”
He connects their glasses soundly and smiles.
“To kicking assholes to the curb.”
Gwen finds it nearly impossible to keep her eyes off the handsome Oklahoman, even after she’s pulled aside by Carson and introduced to one of the show’s newest producers. Blake and Adam are in an animated discussion about something and Pharrell is making conversation with the bartender while he waits on his next concoction.
With everything going on, she still finds the time to look over at Blake, who continues to be oblivious to her random stares.
She gets another blood orange mojito, even though it’s technically not wrong to start drinking by now. She enjoys the way the non-alcoholic beverage tastes both sweet and slightly bitter as it slides down her throat easily and without the after burn of rum or scotch.
Much of the beach has cleared out by now which one might expect from a nearly private location. Tropical beach music can be heard from one of the distanced speakers and all the guys’ attention goes to a young woman that walks up to the bar. The woman couldn’t be in her thirties yet.
“Who wants to dance?” She asks, eyes and posture both flirtatious and Gwen finds herself almost a little envious of how easy it is for the girl.
Carson immediately points out Blake and Adam’s laugh can be heard from miles away.
“Dude, I’ll give you a hundred bucks if you dance with her.”
Blake’s about to flip him off, but the woman presents an even more interesting option.
“All of you guys can come.” She says cheerily, the heavy accent and soft timbre of her voice making it that much harder to keep your eyes off her. The way her bathing suits clings to her body and leaves enough open space on her chest for her boobs to barely be contained doesn’t help either. “My friends and I are starting right now. Come.”
The girl starts pulling at Blake’s hand, trying to get him to move.
Adam must sense his hesitation and gets up quickly.
“We’ll all go.” He smiles.
Gwen knows for a fact she’ll sit this one out.
She watches as the guys, including Carson, make it down to the sandy beach. Gwen takes place at the bar on the middle stool, giving her first-class seats to what’s about to happen. Adam and Pharrell motion for her to join them, but Gwen shakes her head with a giggle.
She hasn’t been drinking at all so far and she’s convinced she needs to be at least a little bit liquored up before doing something like that.
Besides, the girl seems more interested in getting the guys to anticipate.
Is it weird how uncomfortable the girl’s interest in Blake makes her feel?
The music gets louder suddenly and it drowns out the rest of her thoughts.
Gwen’s eyes narrow when she takes in the image of Blake and the dancer girl together, her hands on both of his hips while hers sway suggestively. She doesn’t blame Blake for his wandering eyes in this moment but it doesn’t make it any less stingy.
She bites her lip when the girl turns herself around in his arms and presses her back against his chest. From the look on her face, she’s satisfied by the way Blake responds and Gwen tears her eyes away to look at Adam and Carson, who are both just as far gone with their dance partners.
Gwen turns around in her seat and orders another drink. Rum and coke this time.
She stares down at her phone. 3:45 pm. Time has the tendency to fly by here and while she usually hates it, right now she’s not that mad at it.
She takes a few sips and turns back around, only to jump out of her skin the next second. Blake’s beaming down at her, keeping his hand outstretched to her.
“Come on.” He says.
She gives him her hand but remains confused.
“Why? What are we doing?”
“We’re gonna dance.”
Gwen chokes on her next breath, reaching for her drink in a panic. She takes a few large sips, causing Blake to chuckle.
“Easy…”, he smiles. “That’s the real stuff right there.”
“I know.” She murmurs. “I’m gonna need it.”
“To dance with me?” He asks.
“To dance with you like that.” She says, pointing to the woman who’s grinding up to Adam in the moment.
Blake chuckles again, lower this time.
“I’m afraid it’ll take you much more than a few sips before you’ll do something like that to me, darling.”
Afraid of what she might suggest if she tells him the truth, she stays quiet and lets him drag her out to the sand. The music is even louder from up here and Gwen stands a bit awkwardly in front of him.
She’s not the best dancer but she knows how to move to a beat. It’s different now she’s expected to do that in front of Blake though. Especially with her weird thoughts surrounding him lately.
“Can I?” He asks softly, his hands pointing at her hips.
She gulps and nods.
His hands feel solid and firm on her hips as he softly prompts her to move. He drops his eyes to her hips momentarily before looking up, his head tilting to one side and a hopeful smile playing on his lips. He’s only holding her, leading her, but it feels like so much more.
The music quickly causes her body to live a life of its own and she starts moving a bit more boldly between his arms. He chuckles while trying to keep up and her hands move to his shoulders more confidently.
She leans into him, mouth against his ear. “Is this too much?”
He shakes his head and turns her around, her back pressed against his chest. It’s the same position he was in with the other girl minutes ago, only this time his arms sneak around her stomach.
He didn’t do that before with the younger woman.
She allows her head to rest against his chest, burning up from what it feels like to be so close to him. He moves them sensually to the beat and she drops her gaze when she accidently looks straight at Adam. She can tell he’s surprised to see his two close friends letting loose in such a brazen way, but she can hardly care when Blake’s hot breath hits her neck when he speaks.
“Who taught you to dance like this?”
She bites her lip. “Is twenty years on the road an acceptable answer?”
He hums in response. “I’ve been on the road a similar amount of time, but you don’t see me shaking my hips like this.”
She turns herself back around because the intimacy of their current position becomes too much. Her hands move to his hips and it’s to help guide but also to maintain just a little bit of space between their bodies.
“You need more practice.” Gwen smirks, teasing.
“You’re smart and sexy. Woah.”
She looks up at him and finds him beaming. Dancing with someone has never been this fun. And hot.
If she didn’t like him so much, she’d feel a little violated at the way he states at her. That’s how deeply the look in his eyes affects her. He looks like he would do anything for her in this moment. And the worst part, or the best, she’s not entirely sure, is that she feels the same way and doesn’t look away from his gaze at all.
“Okay, who’s up for another drink? I think we all deserve one.”
Carson’s voice interrupts the intense moment they were having and she inhales sharply. Blake’s hands leave her body and there’s an immediate disappointment there. She misses his touch. How horrible is that?
Blake smiles. “Thanks for the short but educational lesson, Gwen.”
She finds herself blushing at his words.
“I thought she was the one teaching you.” Gwen smiles, nudging her head towards the young twenty something in the back.
“She tried.” He smirks playfully. “I guess I just needed more of an incentive.”
“Incentive to be better?”
“Be better, do better, all of it.”
Gwen hums. “I don’t know Blake. She’s a real good looking girl. If that’s not enough motivation for you, I don’t know what is.”
“And you’re freaking Gwen Stefani.” He lets a long silence follow. “I rest my case.”
She moves her arms around herself and smiles. It’s been so long since she felt desired by anyone, she doesn’t know how to deal with Blake’s kind words. She feels undeserving of the praise but doesn’t dislike hearing it either.
“I’m glad I could help.” She says, biting her lip again. Most people have already deserted the sand and went back up to the bar for drinks. Silence fills the air between them as they continue to stand there, just the two of them. “Wanna go and get wasted with our friends?”
Blake laughs.
“Are you coming with?”
Gwen nods. “I’m not bailing like last time.”
“Then sure, let’s go have some drinks.”