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“On your left.”
Buck blinks, coming out of that half-asleep, half-awake state he’s been in since Eddie was brought into the hospital. He’s still got that anxiety inside, that uneasy feeling, but at least now Eddie’s awake and speaking. And since Chris got them to watch all of the Marvel films, referencing pop culture.
“Eddie,” Buck breathes, scooting closer with his chair. “How are you feeling? Should I get the doctor or-or a nurse or someone?”
Eddie shakes his head, but the corners of his mouth curl up. “No, that’s okay, I’m good. How long was I out?”
“Just overnight… I’m still gonna get a nurse.”
Buck starts standing up, but then he feels a hand on his wrist, barely there, yet electrifying. He whips his head around and stares at Eddie. He’s never had this feeling. Not with anyone, definitely not with him.
Eddie’s hand lingers, softly holding it there. He says, “Stay,” quietly, staring at Buck with red-rimmed eyes.
“O-okay.” Buck almost sits on the seat he was in for the past ten hours, but changes his mind at the last second and sits on the edge of Eddie’s bed. “Are you okay?”
For a while, they’re quiet. The only noises are the beeping of Eddie’s heart rate monitor and distant PA system calls. Eddie’s hand is still on Buck’s wrist, gingerly, almost absentmindedly moving his thumb in a stroking matter. Buck really doesn’t want to think about it, but he can’t not think about it.
“I had to cut my line.”
“I know.”
“I kept thinking - what if it was Chris? What if he was stuck down there?”
“I know.” Eddie wants to speak, but Buck knows what he wants to ask. “He’s fine. He was here last night, he gave you a big ol’ smooch on your forehead. Carla’s watching him.”
Eddie nods a bit, chewing on his lip. There is so much Buck wants to say. He wants to scold him, to tell him off for cutting his line, he wants to tell him not to do anything reckless ever again, he wants to tell him he’s safe now. He wants to tell Eddie that he was so worried, so scared that he was certain the world would collapse under his feet.
Buck doesn’t say anything. He knows Eddie knows. He also knows that there is something else he’d like to say, something he’s been feeling for a while. But he doesn’t say that either.
“Thank you,” Eddie tells him, eventually. His voice is merely a whisper, but it still pierces Buck’s soul. “For not giving up on me.”
“I would never, you know that.”
“I do.” Eddie sighs and winces. Buck’s muscles tense and he wants to run to get a doctor. But Eddie’s hand on his arm moves, so he’s not gripping his wrist anymore, rather he is actively holding his hand, fingers intertwined. “I’m fine, Buck, I promise.”
“Eddie…”
“I am.” He smiles at Buck, but Buck isn’t really convinced. He lets it slide, promising to himself that next time, he’s getting a doctor. “I was… I was underwater and my tank ran out. I thought… That was it, you know? A couple of tours, a helicopter crash and countless disasters, but I never would’ve guessed that I’d meet Grim stuck in a hole.”
“Eddie, you don’t have to.”
“I do, just… let me finish. Please?”
Buck nods as he squeezes Eddie’s hand. There’s a line they’re crossing, maybe. His father would tell him that men don’t hold hands, only in camaraderie. He’d tell him men have to be men, strong and stoical, and he can’t look at Eddie like that, he can’t hold Eddie’s hand like that, he can’t think about Eddie like that. But Buck does, he wants to, he needs to. Ever since meeting Eddie, Buck’s been thinking about him like that and those thoughts are not going anywhere.
“Sorry, continue.”
Eddie blinks a couple of times. “When I was in Afghanistan, we came close to kickin’ it. I never had that ‘life flashing before my eyes’ moment until yesterday. I saw Chris, of course, I did. I knew I couldn't give up because of him. But I saw the 118, the family we have there and I saw you, Buck… It made me understand just how special everyone is, just how special you are.”
“What are you saying, Eddie?”
“You’ve been so good to Chris, so good to me. I don’t know where we’d be without you. You keep us safe, the both of us and you make that kid so happy.” Eddie smiles at Buck. Maybe it’s a sudden thing, maybe it’s been building for a while, maybe it’s always been there. “Come ‘ere.”
Eddie pulls him closer; Buck, avoiding the wires, leans on him, sort of awkwardly hugging him, making sure he’s not pressing against him too much. Eddie burrows his face in the crook of Buck’s neck.
Buck exhales, possibly for the first time since Eddie went into that hole. It hurts, but in a good way, like he needed it, like this breath gives him understanding.
“I know,” he whispers and Eddie holds him tighter.
They don’t need big words or any words at all. That’s what makes them a good team, the silent communication, reading each other’s minds, knowing the other so well.
Eddie pulls back, as much as his pillows let him, and looks at Buck. His eyes keep shifting between his eyes and lips. Maybe it’s because of that connection Buck knows the unspoken question, which he promptly answers by pressing a soft kiss on Eddie’s sore lips.
There is no fanfare, no fireworks. It’s a self-explanatory thing, an easy thing, a safe thing. There is no overthinking, no panicking. It’s not a conclusion, not a final chapter, but rather a beginning of something.
Eddie smiles at him. “Should’ve gotten stuck ages ago, maybe we would’ve been here sooner.”
“Hey! Don’t even think about it.”
“Dad!” Chris yells, bursting into the room.
“Chris!” Eddie lets go of Buck’s hand and tries to sit up as Chris makes his way to the bed. “Oh, how I’ve missed you!”
“How are you, dad?” he asks, as Buck puts him on the bed, next to Eddie. He takes the crutches and leans them against the side table.
“I’m doing great, kid.” He looks at Buck, then back at Chris. “How are you? You didn’t torture poor Carla, did you?”
“I’m going to leave you two alone,” Buck says quietly.
Once again, Eddie reaches for his hand. “Stay.”
“Stay, Buck,” Chris repeats, with a grin.
“Oh, how could I say no to my favourite boys!” he says, which earns a laugh from both Eddie and Chris. “You will not believe this, Chris, but your dad actually referenced Captain America when he woke up.”
“Really?”
For a while, they do some catching-up. Chris gets a diluted version of the events, then they talk about what films they’ll be watching, what food they’ll be eating when Eddie gets out of the hospital later that day.
It’s crazy, Buck reckons, as he listens to Chris and Eddie’s conversation. Never in a million years would he have imagined anything better. He just wishes they skipped the getting trapped bit because the last time he felt that scared for someone was when his sister was in danger. He’s glad Eddie’s safe and sound. He’s glad that against all odds, they ended up here, even if ‘here’ is a bit confusing right now. He’s excited about what the future holds.