Chapter Text
Jaemin thinks it's pointless. Mark thinks it's necessary. Jaemin never really had the ability to go against Mark’s wishes and so, they're standing in front of a guesthouse in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by miles upon miles of woods and mountains. The weather is starting to get a little bit chilly; fall is slowly creeping up on them, even though it's only the beginning of September. Jaemin wishes he wore jeans instead of shorts. True to Mark's words, there aren't many people around. They just about fitted into the gap between two streams of tourists - the summer one and the fall one. Jaemin wants to go home to his laptop and job hunting. All money he has saved up thanks to his two part-time jobs is going to disappear after two weeks in a national park of all places. Mark was so excited about planning a retreat for just the two of them after the hell year they've had, though. Jaemin couldn't refuse.
"There are deer with fangs here, can you believe that?" Mark is talking, a huge grin on his face, as his arms move efficiently to get their bags out of the trunk.
Jaemin has heard about deer with fangs at least seven times already, so yes, he can believe it. Apparently, people who monitor endangered species around here decided to help make Siberian musk deer a little less endangered. There are special areas for the deer, and they've gotten so used to humans, they sometimes come close enough to let themselves be petted. There are also all kinds of other animals around here. Jaemin knows about them more than he'd like, because Mark just wouldn't shut up.
"Let's just check in first, then you can go and hike and look at fanged deer all you like, yeah?" Jaemin suggests.
Mark was adamant about packing into backpacks instead of suitcases, because it's more appropriate for mountains or something, even though they're going to leave the luggage in their room anyway. Jaemin heaves up his own enormous backpack and moves to the entrance, trying not to grunt under the weight he's carrying.
The guesthouse is so very mountains-and-forests, it's ridiculous. Everything Jaemin can see is made of wood. The counter in the main hall looks like it was carved out of a single, gigantic piece of tree. Photographs of breathtaking views are hanging on the walls and Jaemin feels a painful twinge in his chest. He hasn't touched his camera since the funeral and he misses it so terribly.
"Welcome to Mount Wolchul National Park!"
Jaemin flinches, having focused too much on the interior to notice the receptionist. In his defense, the man is half hidden behind a plastic model of the famous Cloud Bridge that takes up most of the counter space. There is also a box full of the Siberian musk deer plushies.
"Um, hi," Jaemin says awkwardly.
The man (although he doesn't look older than eighteen) laughs at his startled face. Jaemin isn't sure he should be treating customers in such a way, but he's too out of his depth to say something about it. Besides, it's kind of refreshing to hear some laughter. He and Mark haven't had a lot of reasons to smile recently, much less laugh. Jaemin knows Mark's sudden enthusiasm for their little vacation is at least half forced, but if there is even the tiniest genuine bit somewhere in there, then Jaemin is going to spend two weeks in fucking nature and try to enjoy himself just to make sure it doesn't disappear.
"Hello!" Mark says, stopping next to him with his own backpack and a smile. "We have a reservation under Mark Lee?"
"Okay, let me just check you in real quick," the man (boy?) chirps happily and turns to the computer.
He has one of those faces that are hard to picture without a smile, and his hair is purple.
"You're lucky, there aren't many customers right now, there's finally gonna be some peace and quiet," he says, reaching to the wall behind him to grab their key. "Summer was crazy, let me tell ya, even the campsite was absolutely packed," he passes the key to Mark along with a pamphlet on the park's most important points. "Here, you have a room with the view of mountains, third floor. If you want to hike, be sure to check what to take with you and keep to the trails, we don't want you eaten by a bear or something, right?"
Jaemin freezes.
"A bear?" he repeats slowly.
The boy smirks. He's definitely a boy, Jaemin decides.
"I'm kidding, it would be a miracle, if you stumbled upon a bear. The trails are safe, if you're not reckless enough to like, go into the woods and get lost. Or, you know, fall off of the Cloud Bridge because of your own stupidity. Oh, we opened a new thing this year, you can see falconers train and feed hawks! Please refrain from trying to feed them yourself, there was already a guy who almost lost his finger in the summer."
Jaemin gulps. The mountains are dangerous, obviously, but somehow, he didn't realize just how much.
"Man, that sounds awful," Mark grimaces. "Is he okay?"
The receptionist shrugs.
"He ended up with eight stitches and mild trauma, could have been worse. My name is Chenle, by the way, if you need anything, please find one of the other staff, I'm barely even qualified for reception." He leans closer to them to add in a too loud whisper, "It was mostly desperation. I came here to visit my best friend for the summer and ended up getting roped into working, because they're horribly understaffed. Three people quit this year, you see."
"Should you be telling us that?" Jaemin asks in surprise.
Not that he hates gossip.
Chenle waves his hand dismissively.
"They don't even pay me, I can do whatever I want."
Mark chuckles at the aloof attitude. Jaemin already knows Chenle is going to be one of Mark's favorite people around here.
They thank Chenle and take the stairs to the third floor. Jaemin is wheezing by the time Mark opens their room. They dump the backpacks on the ground and flop down onto their respective beds.
"Thank fuck we don't have to take all that to hike," Mark sighs.
"It was your idea," Jaemin grumbles.
Mark only swats a hand in his direction.
They go down an hour later, after freshening up and admiring the view from their room a little. The weather is amazing, not a single cloud on the sky. The mountains are vast and absolutely breathtaking, nothing but nature as far as the eye can see. The air is completely different here than in the city and Jaemin thinks about Mr. and Mrs. Lee, letting himself be overwhelmed with guilt and gratitude and sadness for just a moment. They would have loved it here, with the same sensitive, artistic, adventurous souls as their son. Jaemin had received so much from them, up the name, and he didn't even have the time to pay them back.
"Jaemin-ah," Mark says, his fingers circling Jaemin's wrist and pulling. "Stop, we came here to get away from all of it."
Of course Mark knows exactly what's on Jaemin's mind. Jaemin nods and lets Mark lead him down the stairs, into the canteen. They're just in time for lunch. The hall is half full, there are a few other people staying in the guesthouse and probably some tourists that hiked in the morning and became hungry. Jaemin sees three or four families with kids, a few couples and two larger groups of friends. There is also a dude that seems to be the doing-some-soul-searching-on-my-own type. Jaemin and Mark grab some food from the self-serving buffet and stop by the counter to pay.
The staff rings up their food and tells them the price in the most monotonous voice Jaemin's ever heard, but then he looks up and his expression changes, "You must be the guys Chenle told me about! Staying here for two weeks, right? It's pretty cool when there are so few people, you're gonna love it."
Mark and Jaemin exchange a look.
"How do you know it's us?"
The boy points at his own head.
"Pink hair isn't that common around here," he says.
Jaemin pats down his bangs self-consciously.
"Right," Mark says with a grin.
"I'm Jisung," the boy says. He looks really young, too. And skinny. Jaemin has the sudden urge to sit him down and pack food into his mouth until his cheekbones don't look as prominent. "My parents run this place. You can find me, if you need anything, Chenle would only avoid you."
"Yeah, he already warned us he doesn't technically work here," Mark says. "You should tell him not to tattle to everyone he sees."
Jisung groans tiredly and Mark snickers. He's in an exceptionally good mood. Jaemin vows to himself not to ruin that.
"Anyway, enjoy your meal," Jisung says, taking the money Mark offers him. "I'll take care of my best friend's big mouth."
"Make sure to eat some lunch, too," Jaemin says, as they turn around to find a table.
Jisung blinks at him in surprise. Mark chuckles quietly.
"You couldn't help yourself, huh," he says between the giggles.
Jaemin narrows his eyes and flips him off.
"Should we go for a hike later?" Mark asks, as they're stuffing their faces.
"Can't you let me get used to the whole nature thing slowly?" Jaemin whines.
Mark grins at him, this one, brilliant grin, where his whole face scrunches up ridiculously, and something inside Jaemin, something that's been there since the horrible news, lessens just a tiny bit.
"Fine, dude, you can do whatever you want with your fancy iPhone, while I explore," Mark allows.
It's okay to spend some time apart. They've been together for too long anyway, almost attached at the hip since the funeral. It can get tiring. Not that Jaemin's tired, he craves affection probably way too much, but he should give Mark a breather once in a while. Mark's already done so much for Jaemin anyway.
"Let's meet for dinner?" Jaemin suggests.
Mark agrees easily and they separate in the hallway. Jaemin walks up to their room and opens the window, breathing in the fresh air of the mountains. Contrary to what he expected, he doesn't feel like reaching for his phone at all. He's sick of his basketball buddies talking about nothing but the game, and apart from them, he only really talks to his ex. When he checks, she's not online, so he doesn't see the point of staring at the screen. They've talked less and less recently, too. Jaemin doesn't know if it's because he's mostly spent his time with Mark or because they just lack topics to discuss after having broken up two months ago. Maybe they're drifting apart.
Jaemin sits there not thinking for a long while, letting the breeze ruffle through his hair. Birds are singing so loudly, Jaemin almost can't hear anything else. It's nice. Relaxing. So very different from the noise of the city.
Finally, Jaemin decides to leave the guesthouse. He feels itchy all over, a short walk might help, and maybe he'll even see those cute deer.
Mark is nowhere to be seen and Jaemin wonders, if he should leave him one of the sandwiches he had made them for the road. They have some other snacks and the canteen is open late into the night, providing customers with ramyeon and vending machines with snacks. Eventually, Jaemin decides to take all three sandwiches with him in case he gets hungry on his walk. He only had lunch today, after all. Mark devoured the breakfast Jaemin had made for him, but wasn't able to talk Jaemin into eating something as well. Breakfasts aren't really Jaemin's thing and he was kind of nervous about leaving the house for the first time in months. He's not sure why. Mark says they're both scared to let go, but Jaemin thinks it's more complicated than that.
The sun is blinding, warming up his thighs and face and bones. Jaemin breathes in deeply and lets the peculiar calm soothe him. He takes one of the scenic routes that don't venture into the mountains. There are people around, but not many, and they don't bother him. It's nice to be alone for a while. Maybe both he and Mark needed that breather.
Jaemin doesn't go off the trail, but he walks further than he originally planned. There is barely anyone around now. The view is something out of this world. Jaemin takes in the ancient trees with their rich leaf crowns, the dazzling greenery underneath them, the slopes of the mountains all around him, the fearlessly blue sky. It all makes something incredible unfurl in his chest, and he wishes, briefly, that he brought his camera to this trip.
He jumps a foot in the air when something nudges his side, but quickly realizes it's a Siberian musk deer. Its fangs look a little intimidating, but Jaemin knows from the onslaught of information Mark has attacked him with that the deer are herbivorous. They don't normally live in woods like these, and Jaemin is grateful they were brought here, because he's never seen something this damn cute.
Tentatively, Jaemin reaches out his hand, but the deer shies away from touch. It rounds Jaemin and sniffs at his bag. Jaemin remembers the sandwiches and takes them out. He doesn't know what the deer eat (Mark probably told him at some point, but Jaemin has rarely listened to the tsunami of information actively), but he thinks bread probably won't harm them. The deer seems to think so, too, because it greedily nibbles on the sandwich. Jaemin tries to touch it again and manages to pet its head twice before it moves away. Jaemin doesn't feel too bad about it. Soon, another deer shows up, then another, until he's surrounded by five of them. This trip was the best idea Mark could have possibly come up with.
"Excuse me, sir."
Jaemin flinches and looks up. And forgets he has a brain that should be functioning. Not even in his wildest dreams did he think he'd ever consider cargo shorts hot, and yet, here he is. The man is dressed like a proper ranger, from the knee high socks, through the damn shorts, up to the wide brimmed hat. As if that's not already plenty, the whole attire is the color of khaki. And Jaemin's still drooling.
It takes him an embarrassing minute to realize the man is pointing at the sign next to them that asks tourists not to feed wild animals with human food.
"Oh," Jaemin giggles sheepishly and snatches the bread from before the deer's noses. "Sorry, they were just so cute, I didn't even notice the sign."
"If you want to feed them, you can buy special food in the gift shop," the man says.
His face relaxes from the stern expression from before, and if Jaemin didn't see it for himself, he'd never believe this man can be anything other than smiling. One of the deer approaches him to head-butt his side, and the man's eyes curve into pretty half-moons, as he pets the deer's muzzle. Jaemin is having a stroke.
"The gift shop?" he asks dumbly, because the silence was starting to stretch into uncomfortable territory.
The man looks up at him and his eyes widen. They're dark and mesmerizing, and there is a mole under one of them.
"Oh, I meant the store with hiking equipment," he says with an apologetic smile. Jaemin would forgive him anything. "There are also souvenirs and all kinds of stuff, so we got used to calling it the gift shop."
"Okay," Jaemin says, continuing to be dumb without a single problem. "Um, I'll go there then."
More of the deer have surrounded the ranger, demanding petting. It's kind of really fucking amazing.
"Wow, you're almost like Snow White," Jaemin mumbles before he can stop himself.
With the light tone of his skin and the impossibly pink lips, he even kind of looks like Snow White. The man glances up at him and grimaces.
"That's not my favorite comparison," he says and giggles a little. Jaemin feels faint. "I don't think a young girl who used to be a princess would be totally satisfied with being a maid and who knows what else for seven tiny dudes. Mother Nature loved her, she could have overthrown her evil stepmother any second."
Jaemin grins. A Disney nerd with some strong opinions, huh.
"How about Cinderella then?" he asks. "She talked to mice and birds dressed her in the morning."
"And she married the first dude who was nice to her without even getting to know him first," the guy rolls his beautiful eyes.
"Hey, the girl just wanted to have some fun and everyone was giving her shit for it," Jaemin protests. "Besides, the dude was rich and a prince. I'd totally do the same."
"Okay, fair, but she could have talked to someone from the palace about her abusive stepmother, like one of the guards or something, instead of tolerating it by talking to mice," the guy huffs. He reaches to his pocket and pulls out something that looks like crackers, feeding it to the deer. He glances up at Jaemin and grins. "My name is Jeno. Are you the guy Chenle was talking about? With the handsome friend who laughs a lot?"
"Oh, I see how it is," Jaemin huffs. "So only Mark is handsome. I'll remember that, barely qualified receptionist Chenle."
Jeno chuckles cutely. If he asked, Jaemin would put on cargo shorts himself just to get him to laugh.
"Well, you're not that bad," Jeno decides.
Jaemin gasps way too dramatically.
"Not that bad?! Are you straight or something? I'm beautiful!"
Jeno cackles openly now and even the deer look startled.
"It's good to have self-confidence," Jeno says. He takes off the hat to run his fingers through his shiny black hair and Jaemin's brain resets again. "Hey," Jeno perks up suddenly. "Wanna see something cool?"
"I'll see whatever you're willing to show me," Jaemin sweeps his gaze down Jeno's fit body and when he looks back up at his face, he thinks he can spot a faint blush. "I'm Jaemin," he offers finally, treating Jeno to one of his signature, charming smiles.
Jeno grins back and gently pushes the deer away from himself. Jaemin follows him down the path leading back to the guesthouse.
"Have you worked here for long?" he asks, to keep the conversation going but also because he's curious.
"Almost two years now," Jeno says easily. He fixes the hat on his head. "Still didn't really get used to the clothes," he giggles, "but personally, I think I'm rocking the socks."
Jaemin glances down at his socked calves and immediately pictures himself nibbling on them.
"You could lose the hat, though," he says to somehow distract his traitorous brain, because what the fuck.
"I can't, it's a part of the uniform," Jeno shrugs. "It's kinda grown on me, to be honest."
"Well, you'd probably look good even in a trash bag," Jaemin says casually. Jeno glances at him from under his lashes, a little startled maybe. The blush is high on his cheeks, apparent this time. "Is it fun working here?"
"It's peaceful," Jeno says after clearing his throat. Jaemin grins to himself. Flustering cute boys is his favorite pastime, after all. "I like how I feel when I'm here. The city was too stressful for me. I have everything I need here and the animals are the best."
"That sounds amazing," Jaemin says honestly. "And the deer are so freaking cute, even with those fangs," he gushes.
Jeno giggles again and Jaemin could very well be a puddle at his feet, because it feels like he just melted.
"Yeah, the deer are adorable, but I meant all animals that inhabit these mountains. You can spot all kinds of species in the woods, if you know where to look and how to approach them without spooking them. It's incredible to be so close to nature and be like, accepted by it all, you know? It's such a humbling experience, you realize you're not anything special just because you're human and," he pauses abruptly and his ears flush deep pink. Jaemin raises a questioning eyebrow. "Sorry, I tend to just go off about this stuff, I didn't mean to bore you with my pseudo deep thoughts."
"What are you talking about?" Jaemin asks, confused. "That was interesting! I don't usually talk to anyone about serious things like that. It's nice."
It's the third time he has thought how nice it is since he got here. Mark definitely had a great idea to come here.
Jeno smiles at him and Jaemin's soul ascends to another plane of existence.
"Really? That's awesome. My friends are sick of my spiritual bullshit," he makes air quotes. "It's great to meet someone who wants to hear about it."
Jaemin's chest glows with something warm. It's been a while since he last felt this calm and pleasant. Jeno tells him about all kinds of animals he's seen since he came here, a little about the friends he works with and doesn't really mention anything personal, but it didn't escape Jaemin that Jeno didn't confirm being straight before, and that's already something.
They almost reach the guesthouse, when Jeno makes a turn and leads Jaemin down another path. There is a sign at the beginning of it and Jaemin gapes.
"Don't tell me you're one of those guys who train hawks?!"
Jeno throws him a peace sign and a wink, and if that isn't an inherently queer thing to do, Jaemin doesn't know what is. Jaemin's heart is thumping like crazy in excitement. Jeno takes him to a big clearing. There are a few perches in the middle of it, a fence to keep the tourists at a safe distance and a small shed at the edge.
"Stay here," Jeno says and Jaemin obediently stops before the fence.
Jeno goes inside through a gate, closing it after himself, and enters the shed. Jaemin waits impatiently. Jeno reemerges with a thick glove on his right hand and a bag on his hip, but without the hat. He puts a whistle to his pretty lips and blows, and Jaemin's brain really needs to fucking calm down. He's about to see something incredibly cool, for fuck's sake. The whistle doesn't make a sound Jaemin can hear. He holds his breath. Nothing happens for a while and Jaemin spends it admiring Jeno's unreal looks in the slowly lowering sun. The breeze does wonderful things to his shiny black hair.
Jaemin snaps out of his daze, when he sees two shapes descending quickly from the sky. Jeno reaches out his hand and one of the birds lands on it heavily, while the other hovers over Jeno for a second, then aims for the perch in the middle of the clearing and settles on it, cleaning its feathers.
Jaemin is mesmerized.
"This is Fluffy," Jeno says loudly enough for Jaemin to hear. He reaches into the bag and takes out a piece of meat, letting the bird swallow it. "Good boy, Fluffy, you came so quickly and here I was, thinking you'd disappoint me again," he coos at the bird.
Fluffy is gigantic and deep brown, with white spots in his feathers here and there. His beak looks sharp and dangerous, and Jeno is holding him the same way you hold a puppy. A thrilled shiver runs down Jaemin's spine. Jeno smooths his finger over Fluffy's head, then straightens his arm and makes a specific kind of sound. Fluffy stretches out his enormous wings and takes off. Jeno blows the whistle again and throws a piece of meat high in the ear. Fluffy catches it easily. Jaemin's heart is too big for his chest. He's never seen anything so incredible before. Jeno laughs delightedly, with his whole chest, and Jaemin has to correct his statement. Now he's never seen anything so incredible before.
Fluffy doesn't land on Jeno's hand this time, taking up one of the perches. Jeno blows the whistle and the other bird flies over to him. Jeno presents it to Jaemin proudly with a wide grin and his face glowing.
"This is Winter," he introduces. "Here you go, girl," he says to the bird, giving her a piece of meat as well.
Winter is beautiful. She's much smaller than Fluffy, white and grey and black, with a graceful slope to her silhouette. Jaemin kind of wants to touch, but Jeno told him not to move from behind the fence, which means it's probably dangerous.
Jeno makes Winter do the same trick as Fluffy did, and then does some sounds that cause the bird to stay motionless in the air, using the breeze to hover in place. Jeno throws her another piece of meat for that, then blows the whistle, and both birds take off, disappearing in the mountains.
"They were so fucking awesome!" Jaemin exclaims as soon as Jeno joins him after leaving the glove and the bag of meat in the shed. "It's amazing you can do things like that! Have you been doing it for long? Are they from here or did you bring them with you to the park? Are there any others who take care of birds around here? Can I pet them someday? Is it difficult to teach them to do what you want? Aren't you scared they're not going to come, if they just live wildly somewhere in the mountains? Why did you call him Fluffy? Are they dangerous? How did you even decide to do this?"
"Whoa, hey!" Jeno laughs. "Slow down, way too many questions to remember. I'm glad you enjoyed the show!"
"It was so cool!" Jaemin almost yells.
"I've been training Fluffy and Winter since I came here," Jeno says. He can't seem to stop smiling at him, and Jaemin revels in the attention. "We still have a long way to go, but they even started bringing me treats!"
"Treats? Like what?"
They start walking back towards the guesthouse. It's getting a little chilly with the evening approaching and Jaemin is glad he put on some proper jeans before leaving the room.
"Little rodents, mostly," Jeno shrugs sheepishly and Jaemin makes a face. "I know it's gross, but it's like they're taking care of me, you know? I guess they think I'm helpless, since I don't have a beak or talons. They still listen to me, though, and do stuff I want them to. It's an incredible feeling to have a wild beast's trust."
"Damn," Jaemin says, in absolute awe. "So they've lived here before you came?"
"Yeah," Jeno nods. "I still can't believe I got to do this. It was a whim, kinda. I came to work here with Hyuck, he's been my best friend since high school and he talked me into giving this austringer thing a go."
"Isn't it falconry?" Jaemin asks.
He doesn't even know why it's so fascinating to him. But then again, Jeno could talk about cargo shorts for two hours, and Jaemin probably wouldn't miss a single word.
"It's falconry, when you're training falcons," Jeno tells him. They're almost by the guesthouse. "When it's hawks and eagles, you're an austringer."
"So Fluffy and Winter are eagles?"
"Fluffy is a spotted eagle," Jeno says with a soft smile. "He's the best boy, even though he likes a little mischief. Winter is a black winged kite. She's called that because she hovers over the ground like what you saw. You could say they're generally hawks."
"That's amazing," Jaemin says, for what feels like the fourteenth time. "Thanks for showing them to me."
"I just wanted to brag," Jeno giggles, scratching his head a little awkwardly. "They're my babies and you seemed like a cool guy. I don't have anyone to talk to about them with, other austringers left like, two weeks ago, because it's the end of the season. And they had their own birds with them, not wild ones, so it was still a little different."
"Sorry for giving bread to the deer," Jaemin mumbles, suddenly ashamed of being this stupid.
Jeno clearly loves his work and he even showed him something as cool as training wild birds, while Jaemin went and did the dumb tourist thing.
"Don't worry about it," Jeno pats his arm gently and Jaemin nearly passes out. "Bread isn't that bad. They prefer easily digestible stuff, mostly lichen, but the ones here got used to the tourists and prey on poor humans who are weak for cute things. You wouldn't believe what people sometimes feed them."
"That sucks," Jaemin grumbles. "People are so stupid."
"Not all of them," Jeno says, devastatingly optimistic, and treats Jaemin to another adorable wink.
Jaemin is definitely one of those poor humans who are weak for cute things.
•
The sky is starting to darken by the time they reach the guesthouse. The sun is almost setting in the west, leaving lilac and orange clouds in its wake. Tree shadows lengthen considerably. The air is so impossibly clear. All Jaemin can smell is greenery and earth. They step into the wooden lobby and Jaemin notices the entrance to the hiking equipment store that he somehow missed before.
"So…" Jaemin starts, unsure where they go from here.
They spent maybe two hours together and it already feels like he's known Jeno for half of his life and has pined after him for equally as long.
It's not time for dinner yet, as the sign by the now closed reception desk reads and Jaemin really doesn't want to go back to the room and be alone with his thoughts again.
"Here, see?" Jeno points. "The gift shop."
Jaemin nods dumbly and thankfully doesn't have the time to do anything else, because Jeno grabs his wrist and pulls him along. They barely make it inside, when Jeno pauses and his eyes widen in horror.
Jaemin looks towards the counter. Barely qualified receptionist Chenle is next to it, browsing the shelf with animal plushies, but Jaemin can tell he's keeping a close ear on the conversation happening between the clerk and a middle-aged man.
"It's eighty seven percent legit," the clerk is saying. His skin is the most beautiful golden Jaemin has ever seen and his cheeks beg to be pinched. The dark of his big eyes is deep and warm and mischievous. There is a certain charm to him that makes Jaemin's gay show almost as fast as it did when he saw Jeno. Almost. "We don't take responsibility for the other thirteen percent, though. As you probably know, it mostly depends on the person how they react to a particular combination of herbs, but- oh, excuse me, sir, aren't you staying at our guesthouse?"
Chenle turns around, feigning pleasant surprise.
"Yes, I am! Why?"
"This lovely gentleman is considering buying our special herbs to help him for his insomnia!" the clerk chirps with a lovely smile. "I think you bought them last week, isn't that right?"
"Oh yeah!" Chenle exclaims readily. "They work wonders, especially if you have trouble sleeping with noises around, like me!"
"Ah, is that so?" the man asks, obviously falling for it. "I'll take them then."
"Really?" the clerk's eyes sparkle and he leans in to add, conspiratorially, but way too loudly, "I'm sure your wife's snoring issue won't bother you again."
The man flushes a little, but takes out money, and Jaemin realizes Jeno has moved from beside him. The clerk takes the money and passes over a small package with the sweetest smile. Jaemin is sure that the fact he's easy on the eyes makes up at least sixty percent of his success rate.
"Lee Donghyuck!" Jeno yells, next to the counter by now.
"Oh shit!" Lee Donghyuck hisses and shoots the customer another smile. "Pleasure doing business with you, see you next time!" The man nods and scurries away without looking back. Lee Donghyuck quickly shoves his hands under the counter and Jaemin hears a click. "It's not what you-" Lee Donghyuck pauses when his eyes find Jeno and his expression changes to exasperation in a millisecond. "Are you kidding me? I thought you were Renjun! Don't scare me like that."
Jeno flails his arms and Jaemin watches with almost as much fascination as he did back on the clearing.
"You think I'm not capable of telling auntie about your little business?" Jeno's attempts at threatening shouldn't be this hot.
Lee Donghyuck right out leers.
"Remember that time you called me when you got stuck-"
"It's great that you're working hard!" Jeno squeaks immediately, flailing even more.
His ears are pink again. Jaemin snickers. Whatever happened, it must have been hilarious and embarrassing.
"Hey, this is the guy I was talking about!" Chenle screeches. It's not hard to guess he's obnoxiously loud on a regular basis. If Jaemin said he wasn't extremely pleased with the attention he's gotten in just a few hours since coming here, he'd be lying. "The one who's totally your t-"
"Zhong Chenle, don't think I won't make Fluffy and Winter scratch your eyes out!" Jeno warns.
It's almost a growl. Jaemin's stomach swoops.
"Oh, please, you love me and your birds do, too," Chenle scoffs, condescending. He gives Jaemin a once-over and his lips stretch in a smirk. "Gotta say, you sure work fast, I didn't think you'd just randomly meet him like that."
Jeno sighs, all fight leaving him in two seconds flat.
"You two are gonna make me grey prematurely, I swear," he grumbles.
Jaemin thinks he's pouting and can't believe he's lucky enough to witness it. He thinks about Jeno's shiny black hair greying.
"That would be a shame," he says, but Lee Donghyuck says it at the same time.
They look at each other, and Jaemin doesn't know what it is, exactly, but some understanding passes between them, and he already thinks of Donghyuck as his new best friend.
"Lee Donghyuck, pleasure," Donghyuck reaches out his hand with a smile that could probably start wars.
"Lee Jaemin, nice to meet you," Jaemin shakes his hand and reciprocates the smile.
"Great, now be a good new best friend and tell me who's that hot piece of ass you came here with that Chenle showed me during lunch," Donghyuck says.
He doesn't beat around the bush. Jaemin already loves him. He didn't notice neither Donghyuck nor Chenle at the canteen during lunch, but maybe they just appeared for a second, for Mark-watching purposes. Thinking about Mark as hot makes him grimace.
"Oh?" Donghyuck raises an eyebrow. "Why the face?" Jaemin is about to answer, when Donghyuck continues, "Is he maybe your brother or something?"
Jaemin hums thoughtfully. Of course he considers Mark his brother. He'd do anything for Mark. He has issues, though, and those issues still don't let him think of himself as a proper part of Mark's family.
"It's... complicated," he settles on. "But I could never think of him as a hot piece of ass, that's for sure."
Donghyuck tilts his head to the side, considering.
"Well, okay then, but is he single?"
"Very much so," Jaemin nods eagerly. "I don't know, if he'd be interested, though."
"Why not?" Donghyuck covers his mouth as his eyes widen. "Is he like, straight or something?"
Jaemin laughs. Chenle giggles. Jeno rolls his mesmerizing eyes.
"You two are way too open about this stuff, this is a public place, you know?"
Donghyuck and Jaemin ignore the words.
"If he is, he wouldn't dare admit to such heresy in front of me," Jaemin says way too seriously.
"So you're obviously close, but don't talk about these things?" Donghyuck asks skeptically.
"Lee Donghyuck!" Jeno hisses, scandalized.
"I mean, he's never really been in a relationship, you know?" Jaemin shrugs.
"Should you even be telling us that…?" Jeno mumbles, resigned.
"All he's ever told me is that he just didn't find someone he'd really like yet," Jaemin continues, throwing an amused glance Jeno's way.
"Hmm," Donghyuck says and then shows another brilliant smile, grabbing one of the miniature Cloud Bridges from the shelf next to him and holding it like a microphone. "This is Haechan cam with a 37.5 percent viewer rating," he starts in the tone of a TV presenter. "Today, we discuss the situation of a certain client, who unfortunately couldn't join us in the studio. Thankfully, we have his best friend slash brother?" he asks, glancing at Jaemin and continues immediately, when Jaemin nods, "here with us and he's willing to discuss some pressing matters. Ladies, gentlemen and other motherfuckers, please welcome Lee Jaemin-ssi!"
Chenle claps dutifully and even Jeno looks reluctantly amused. Jaemin is mostly intrigued.
"So, Jaemin-ssi, tell us, is it true that today's client claims he hasn't yet found a person he'd like enough to be in a relationship with?" Donghyuck asks him, putting the bridge under his nose.
Jaemin decides to play along.
"Yes, it's true, Haechan-ssi!" he agrees solemnly. He's not sure why Donghyuck calls himself that, but he'll ask later. "I tried talking to him about boys, but it's been useless so far! Do you have any advice how I should approach this topic with him? I only want him to be happy!"
"Oh my god, you two deserve each other, what have I done," Jeno says in horror.
"We're glad you reached out to us, Jaemin-ssi," Donghyuck continues, utterly ignoring Jeno. "We'll do whatever we can to help! In order to do that, we invited a known expert on everything queer, Zhong Chenle, to our studio!"
Chenle bows and then waves to non-existent audience.
"Thank you, hello, nice to meet everyone!"
People in the store are starting to pay attention to their little show, but Jaemin is having too much fun to care.
"Chenle-ssi, can you give our client some quality advice on this matter?" Donghyuck asks briskly.
"Well, I don't intend to brag," Chenle starts haughtily, "but in my expert opinion, I'd say the client is still somewhat confused about his sexuality. It might also be that his sexuality is fluid, of course, since choosing not to pick a label is absolutely valid. But if he simply hasn't found out yet, I'd recommend trying different things. If he says he hasn't met the right person, there's a possibility that he's pansexual or demisexual, or, just like me, sex doesn't interest him at all and he just wants to find someone who would cuddle with him on a daily basis, help him with his taxes and adopt a few dogs with him."
Donghyuck has been nodding all along and finally snatches the bridge from Chenle's face.
"Thank you, Chenle-ssi, it's been wonderful having you with us! Does that help with your best friend slash brother issues, Jaemin-ssi?"
"Yes!" Jaemin exclaims too enthusiastically. "That was indeed some quality advice, I'm glad I decided to contact your studio! Thank you so much, now I know how to talk with my best friend slash brother about his feelings!"
All three of them grin at each other like loons. Jeno rubs his forehead to hide the tiny smile on his face and says gravelly, "I regret everything."
Jaemin chuckles.
"Hey, your friends are cool!"
Donghyuck gasps.
"Did you hear that, Chenle? A hottie called us cool! Such high praise, I don't know what to do with myself!" he squeals, hitting Chenle's arm repeatedly.
Jaemin can't stop grinning.
"You're kind of an asshole, aren't you," he says to Donghyuck.
Donghyuck has a dangerous smirk on his face, when he looks Jaemin right in the eye and says, "Yes. Do you think your best friend slash brother is gonna be into it?"
Jaemin puts a hand on his shoulder.
"You officially have my permission to try and seduce him," he allows grandly. Then backtracks a little, "Oh, but if you hurt his feelings, I will burn down this place with you inside."
Donghyuck laughs like cartoon villains and puts his own hand on Jaemin's shoulder, which makes them look completely ridiculous.
"I like your style! We have a deal."
Jaemin nods, then withdraws his arm.
"I'm serious, though," he says. He doesn't want to think about everything that happened, but someone messing with Mark's feelings would definitely only make it worse. And they managed to get away from everything finally, too. "He's been through some stuff lately."
Donghyuck blinks at him, but all he says is, "Okay."
"Jaemin-ah."
Jaemin turns around to look at Jeno, who only drops a small package into his hand.
"That's for the deer," he explains. "You can go and feed them tomorrow, if you want?"
"Where are you gonna be tomorrow?" Jaemin asks before he can psyche himself out.
Chenle whistles lowly and Jeno's cheeks darken, but both he and Jaemin ignore the receptionist.
"Around," Jeno mumbles. His dark, warm eyes are staring right into Jaemin's soul. "We might bump into each other again."
"Bumping into you is all I plan on doing tomorrow," Jaemin says, because he thinks he's funny.
This time, both Donghyuck and Chenle whistle, and Jeno flushes even more.
"Right," he blurts out. "Great. The dinner is starting soon, we should close up."
"Okay," Jaemin says. His lungs seem to be filled with helium, trying to lift him off the ground. "See you tomorrow, then. Bye, Donghyuck, Chenle."
"Bye!" they singsong in unison.
Jaemin leaves the store and pretends not to hear the snickers and teasing comments meant for Jeno's ears. Mark is already waiting for him in the canteen.
"Dude, you won't believe the day I had," they say in unison.
Mark giggles, his whole face doing the scrunching up it does, when he's particularly happy or excited.
"You first," he allows. "But let's get food."
They grab dinner and find an empty table. Jaemin spends a good fifteen minutes telling Mark what happened. More than half of that time might or might not be spent on describing Jeno's socked calves and his unreal eyes. He doesn't say what he talked about with Donghyuck, and Mark doesn't call him out for the fact that he didn't spend the day in their room, even though he said he would.
"I can't believe you went and got a crush the day we got here," Mark shakes his head at him. "But the eagles sound so cool! You think he'd show me, too?"
"Maybe," Jaemin grins.
"Oh no," Mark says immediately. "You have your demonic face going on. What's happening in that deranged head of yours right now?"
Jaemin slaps his arm, because he shoved too much rice into his mouth and can't retort verbally. Mark slaps him right back. Jaemin swallows the food only to complain about the pain.
"You started it!" Mark points out.
"You called me deranged!" Jaemin screeches. "And I only meant I could try to convince him to show you, but it wouldn't be for free!"
"Don't try to trick me, you think I can't tell you'd kill for a chance to convince him?" Mark snorts.
"How dare you!" Jaemin gasps. "Who do you think I am, hyung? Some deceitful trash?"
Mark takes another bite of his meat and cocks his head to the side thoughtfully.
"Yeah?" he admits.
Jaemin slaps him again, but there is no point denying the obvious any longer. Of course he'd kill for a chance to use his persuasion tactics on Jeno. To have Jeno at his mercy and try out everything he'd want to in order to convince him to do something. With the socks involved and everything else discarded. Obviously.
"Tell me about your day," he says to very subtly change the subject, but Mark still smirks.
"Okay, so I went on a hike, right," he says anyway, just to indulge Jaemin, because he's a perfect best friend slash brother like that. "And first, I was followed by a kid-"
"A kid?" Jaemin cuts in surprised.
"That's what I just said," Mark says, and Jaemin makes a face and parrots him. Mark slaps his arm, because apparently it's already become a thing, and continues, "I pretended not to see her, because she was trying to be stealthy in that adorably obvious way kids are, you know? But then she tripped and fell and started crying, and I couldn't pretend anymore. Crying kids are fucking terrifying, dude. I have no idea what you do with one. But thankfully, her parents were close and took care of her, and then we came back here together and they bought me ice cream," his lips twist into that tiny sad smile that makes Jaemin's heart clench painfully every single time without fail. He must be thinking about his parents. "That was so weird, but like, in a good way. And then I had a lot of time till dinner, so I went out to just sit on the grass behind the guesthouse and enjoy nature or whatever. And a ranger found me and started yelling at me, and it turned out I was sitting on some endangered species of a plant," he grins sheepishly and Jaemin sighs in relief at not being the only idiot in… the family. God, even thinking of them like that makes the guilt almost choke him.
"Was he wearing socks?" he asks to distract himself.
Mark is the one to make a face now.
"Yo, that's a really weird kink you have going on. Is that seriously the only thing you wanna know?"
Jaemin pouts.
"It's not a kink," he mutters unconvincingly.
"Right," Mark says and avoids another slap to his shoulder. "No, he was wearing pants. They were cargo pants, though, so probably similar to your cute boy's shorts. He was also kinda," Mark pauses, looking for a word, "tiny," he settles on. "But he really had some impressive lungs on him, my ears are still ringing."
That's an obvious exaggeration, but Jaemin has always liked the colorful additions that make Mark's stories more interesting. Mark hasn't looked this relaxed in months and Jaemin props his chin on his hand, as he looks at the smooth lines of his face. He is handsome, with his boyish charm and huge, puppy-like eyes, and the way his lips always seem to be just a little bit pursed. Jaemin isn't surprised Donghyuck called him a hot piece of ass. He hopes that Donghyuck, if not anything more, is at least going to be a sufficient, pleasant distraction for Mark. He hopes he won't let himself think too much, either.
"I'm glad you made me come here," he admits honestly.
Mark's whole face scrunches up in a grin.
"I'm glad you don't hate the nature as much as you always claim to," he gives back. The grin takes on a teasing edge. "Or is it only socks that made you say that?"
Jaemin slaps his arm for the umpteenth time and Mark throws his head back and laughs.
•
The next day, mountains are covered with thick, grey clouds, barely visible under the heavy amounts of rain. Jaemin loves the smell of all that greenery soaked through, so he puts on a hoodie and opens their window, staring out into the nature and taking big gulps of it. Mark looks like a beaten puppy and complains about the cold, so Jaemin suggests they build a blanket fort and hide inside to share snacks and listen to the rain pattering on the windowsill. Mark visibly perks up at that and gets to work, while Jaemin makes a trip down to the vending machines in the canteen.
He's trying to decide, if he should buy salted peanuts or not, when something in his periphery moves.
"Get the caramel covered ones instead."
Jaemin turns his head and something restless disappears from his chest after having bothered him the whole morning.
"Jeno!"
Jeno grins, his eyes disappearing in it completely. Jaemin swoons. Jeno still has his ranger uniform on, but he exchanged his shorts for full-length pants, which means the socks are gone, too. Jaemin is only slightly disappointed.
"What are you up to today?" Jeno asks, with that world brightening smile still in place.
"Hyung wanted us to go for a hike together, but," Jaemin shrugs, gesturing towards the window and the grayness outside. "So we're making a blanket fort."
Jeno's face, if possible, glows even more.
"That's awesome! I haven't done that since I was like, ten," he says with a cute little giggle. "Would you mind, if I came to check it out? I'm on my break now."
"Aren't you supposed to be eating something during a break?" Jaemin asks before he can stop himself from slipping into his every-cute-creature-that-I-care-about-should-be-well-fed mode.
Jeno blinks and tilts his head to the side, which nearly causes Jaemin to experience an aneurysm there and then. He points at the vending machine with an adorably puzzled look on his face.
"I wanted to buy those caramel peanuts, though?" he informs Jaemin.
Jaemin tells himself to be strong and narrows his eyes.
"Have you at least had a proper breakfast today?"
Jeno's mouth twitches, as if he's trying hard not to smile again.
"I had like, two granola bars," he admits.
Jaemin would put his hands on his hips right about now, but he has an armful of snacks to hold.
"Are you gonna have a break during lunch?"
Jeno looks a little bit sheepish, but still amused.
"No?" he mumbles.
"Okay," Jaemin decides and dumps all the snacks he bought into Jeno's hands, watching him fumble with them a little. "I assume you have access to the kitchens. Let's go."
"What?" Jeno says, but follows him obediently.
Jaemin opens the door to the kitchens with a flourish, then withers a little under the surprised and reprimanding looks he receives from the staff busy with breakfast cleanup. They all soften considerably, when they spot Jeno behind him.
"Who's that, Jeno-ah?" one of the older ladies asks with a warm smile and an intrigued glint in her eyes.
"That's, uh, that's Jaemin," Jeno stutters. "My friend, I met him yesterday. I just don't know why we're here?" he looks questioningly at Jaemin, but Jaemin is too busy relishing the fact that Jeno called him his friend to pay attention to his confusion.
"Would you mind, if I borrowed a few ingredients and a little bit of space?" Jaemin asks the lady, throwing in one of his most charming smiles.
"Oh my," the lady covers her mouth with a pleased expression. "And why do you need that?"
"This guy here skipped breakfast and was planning to eat peanuts for lunch," Jaemin glances at Jeno with his eyes narrowed in disapproval again, but Jeno is absolutely, utterly unaffected, which means he only offers Jaemin that confused grin again, and that's just awful.
Jaemin has important stuff to focus on here.
"Jeno-ah!" the lady admonishes, but melts as soon as Jeno turns that grin on her. Jaemin can relate. "Well, I suppose it's okay. Take whatever you need, hardworking boys like our Jeno should be properly fed, after all."
Jaemin wonders, if the lady is what is to become of him, when he grows old.
"Thank you, miss," he says with feeling, bowing with as much flourish as he packed into his entrance.
The lady giggles in delight behind her hand. They both ignore Jeno's weak attempts at protesting. Other staff ignore all three of them. Jaemin shoots a quick text to Mark, because leaving him hanging would be a shitty thing to do, and Jaemin doesn't want a single shitty thing to happen to Mark ever. Especially, if it's his doing. Especially when they decided to build a blanket fort. The only thing Mark texts back is 'Is he wearing the socks?', so Jaemin figures they're fine and doesn't reply to that blatant provocation. It reminds him of the sad reality that Jeno is in fact not wearing the socks. He tries to focus on the task at hand to stop thinking about that.
He doesn't make anything too complicated, just some rice with eggs and some bacon, and asks the nice lady, if he could take some with him to give his brother. She agrees with enthusiasm worthy of a concerned grandmother who hasn't seen her grandkids eat properly for at least three hours, then makes him and Jeno sit down at one of the tables near the back to be certain they don't eat in a rush.
"Never eat while standing," the lady tells them with absolute conviction. "A meal should be given some proper respect."
No one has ever told Jaemin anything like that, and he feels weirdly touched to receive such a domestic advice from a complete stranger. If his life had been different, maybe this would have made him nostalgic and miss his childhood. As it is, he only misses something he's never had.
"This is awesome," Jeno says after a few bites with his mouth full and eyes sparkling. Warmth spreads through Jaemin's chest. "Do you cook a lot?"
"Kinda, yeah," Jaemin shrugs. He's been responsible for his and Mark's meals for the last few months, and cooked fairly often even before that. If he left it to Mark, they'd be forced to survive on cup ramyeon and store bought kimbap. "This is just some simple breakfast, though. Nothing special."
Jeno smiles at him again, eyes tiny crescent moons, his nose scrunched up.
"It's been a while since someone cooked for me," he says. "It's very kind. Thanks."
For some reason, it makes Jaemin bashful. He ducks his head, painfully aware of the way his face heats up. Despite that awareness, it's a pleasant feeling.
"You're welcome," he mumbles and shovels his own food into his mouth to have something to do.
Jeno reaches over to pat his shoulder. His hand is warm and his fingers are long and slender. Jaemin swoons again.
They finish eating in relative silence. Jaemin grabs a lunchbox from the lovely lady and packs the leftovers for Mark. Jaemin doesn't think Mark would mind Jeno crashing their blanket fort party, but he's still a little anxious about it. As it turns out, it's not necessary. Mark crawls out from beneath a stack of chairs and pillows and offers Jeno his hand and an easy grin.
"Mark Lee, nice to meet you. Are you wearing the socks under those pants?"
Jeno blinks at him with sheer confusion and Jaemin is torn between laughing his ass off and being embarrassed on his brother's behalf.
"Mark Lee!" he hisses, fighting a laugh.
Mark shrugs and his mouth curls into something sharper. Jeno shakes his hand.
"Nice to meet you, too, but I have no idea what you're talking about," he admits. "Of course I'm wearing socks."
Mark snickers.
"Nevermind."
"So do you guys always build blanket forts when you're bored?" Jeno asks curiously.
Jaemin and Mark exchange a look.
"It's the second time ever," Mark says, staring at Jaemin with sudden realization.
Jaemin's stomach immediately plummets. The first time they made a blanket fort was right after the Lees adopted him. Jaemin was overwhelmed with gratitude and unsure, if what was happening was reality. Mark let him hang up some fairy lights and lie on the floor under the blankets and blabber about all his doubts and fears for as long as he wanted. Mrs. Lee made Jaemin's favorite food for dinner and didn't mention it, when tears welled up in his eyes. Mr. Lee gave his back a friendly pat that almost made him spit out his lungs. Jaemin never thought he'd miss that particular display of aggressive affection.
"Maybe you should build them more often then. You seem to enjoy it," Jeno says, because he's the nicest creature in existence.
Jaemin catches Mark's gaze, trying to communicate all the things he can't put into words. Judging by Mark's soft eyes, he gets it.
"Yeah," he says gently. "We should."
Jeno helps them build and by the time his break is over, he and Mark have their own unique handshake figured out. Jaemin feels oddly satisfied; Mark didn't really like his ex, and although Jaemin tries not to think about it as his brother meeting his partner, he can't exactly help it.
"It was great to meet you, man," Jeno says with an easy laugh, waving at Mark from the door. "I should go back to work now, but good luck with your blanket fort!" he glances at Jaemin and his expression changes a little, enough to make Jaemin's stomach swoop. "Thanks for the food. I'll see you around, yeah?"
Jaemin nods, something inside him fluttering wildly. Jeno shoots them both another brilliant grin and disappears out the door, but not out of Jaemin's head.
While Jaemin lies under all the sheets and blankets they've put up and rants about Jeno's sparkling eyes and sparkling personality, Mark shovels the food Jaemin brought him into his mouth, humming in appropriate moments to show his support. When he's done, he lies down next to Jaemin and says, "It feels like my life got stuck at that funeral and will never move forward again."
Everything in Jaemin shuts down.
"I mean, it did feel like that," Mark corrects himself and Jaemin exhales after what feels like ages. "It's a tiny bit different finally. Maybe."
Jaemin socks him in the arm, laughing somewhat hysterically.
"Fuck, dude, don't do that to me!"
"Sorry," Mark huffs, grinning a little. "But I'm serious, man. I'm only telling you this, because I feel a bit better out here, but it was like- like every day was the same, over and over again, like nothing changed and I lost the ability to experience emotions or something."
Jaemin nods. He understands more than he'd like.
"Maybe you should get laid," he says, because he can't stand Mark's raw honesty for long, even if he should maybe use this opportunity to talk about it, because Mark rarely ever opens up like this.
And even though Mark has all the right in the world to get offended at that crude comment, exactly because he rarely opens up like this, he only chuckles and elbows Jaemin in the ribs. Their affection for each other has always manifested in rather violent ways.
"Shut up," Mark mutters, voice a lot lighter. "As opposed to someone, I don't have boys with nice calves and nice eyes popping out wherever I go."
Jaemin bites his tongue before he blurts out something like, 'Yeah, but I know one boy with nice eyes and bad attitude, who is very much interested.' Instead, he smirks and singsongs, "So you'd be fine with such boys, huh?"
Mark glances at him with wide eyes.
"What? No, I don't- I didn't mean it like that! I was just referring to Jeno, I'm not saying it has to be boys!"
"Boys and girls?" Jaemin picks up swiftly. "Nice eyes regardless of gender? Come on, give me something, you're fully fucking aware I'm dying to know your preferences!"
Mark turns back to the ceiling and hums non-committally, flustered, and Jaemin resigns himself to remaining in the dark forever. But then Mark opens his weirdly attractive mouth and mumbles, "Mostly boys, I think."
Jaemin sits up so abruptly, he almost makes their painstakingly designed creation fall down on top of their heads. He knows the Lees never really talked about sexuality or relationships with their son. Maybe Mark had the same suspicion as Jaemin, that they had assumed Mark is straight and also that they didn't really approve of anything other than that. Now they'll never know. Jaemin thinks that might be one of the things Mark regrets not doing, while he had the chance. It must be tough living in a world, where you can't count on any advice about dating from your own parents.
"Holy shit," Jaemin says, in proper awe. Mark's face could be used as a neon sign. "Boys."
"I'm not really sure, though!" Mark says immediately.
"Obviously. It would be weird, if you were. You've never been in a relationship before."
Mark gets even redder. Jaemin is having fun, and it's kind of shocking, but not really. Mark has always been a great source of entertainment for him.
"Wait," Jaemin says suddenly. "Have you ever kissed anyone?"
Mark's gaze slips away from Jaemin's face.
"Yeah," he mutters very quietly.
"What?! When?" Jaemin exclaims.
This is so exciting. Mark never tells him these things.
"Well," Mark starts, clears his throat, "at Johnny's parties sometimes-"
"SOMETIMES?!" Jaemin roars and Mark grimaces. "Sorry. Sometimes, as in, more than once? Holy shit," he repeats incredulously. "Why didn't you tell me?"
Mark deems it safe to look at him again, apparently, because his frown is directed straight at Jaemin's face.
"I mean, we never really talk about this stuff, it would be weird."
"Well, we're changing that," Jaemin declares dramatically. "We are going to talk about this stuff henceforth!"
"Henceforth?" Mark cracks a grin.
"Yeah!" Jaemin says, with feeling. "We need change, right? So we're starting from that."
Mark's face softens and Jaemin knows he did something right for once.
"Okay," Mark allows, very quietly again.
"Okay," Jaemin repeats, then drops back down on his stomach to the blanket covered floor, swinging his feet in the air. "So who did you kiss?"
•
Jaemin never really noticed how nice earth smells after rain. It's a bit shocking, because he finds that smell addictive right now.
"It's pretty great, right?" Mark says.
He seems calm and Jaemin basks in the feeling of having him there, present with all his being, not lost in his thoughts.
They're sitting on one of the benches in front of the guesthouse. The sky is dark and clear, of a truly beautiful indigo hue, stars twinkling brightly without the light pollution that tags along with big cities. They spent the whole day together, talking about boys, girls, kissing, life, conspiracy theories and memes, and Jaemin feels oddly content. After dinner, he dragged Mark outside, wiping the bench dry with a tissue, so they could sit comfortably. None of the young workers they'd met have shown up throughout the day, but the old lady from this morning was at the counter during dinner, and she gave Jaemin an apple for free. Jaemin is not disappointed he didn't see Jeno since the morning; he came here to spend time with Mark, after all. Any new acquaintances can wait.
"It feels kind of," Mark searches for the right words and Jaemin waits, staring into the sky. "Endless," Mark says finally. "It's like we could get swallowed by eternity, emerge back at any given point in time. Like everything is nothing and nothing is everything."
Jaemin's chest expands at the words, the stars so close he could reach out and pluck a few right out of the inky darkness. Leave it to Mark to be able to put that feeling into words.
"That's deep, bro," he says in English, because he knows Mark will nudge his side and huff a laugh.
"You're such an asshole," Mark says after doing just that.
"You love me," Jaemin murmurs.
He wouldn't mind being swallowed by the universe, he thinks.
"Yeah," Mark says, and they both fall quiet.
Jaemin doesn't want that feeling to ever vanish.
•