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The air in the room was thick, everyone felt it.
Jihoon knew they wanted to say something but everyone was being cautious.
That, he was thankful for.
"Are you going?" Seungcheol's voice was soft, after being friends with Jihoon for years, it's safe to say that he knew Jihoon like the back of his hand.
Jihoon still sat in the sofa in silence, the cream invitation still in his hands, his brain still isn't functioning from the information he just received.
"Jihoon...you know if you don't want t-"
"No, i'll go." Jihoon cut of Jeonghan, who was seated right in front of him.
"I'll go, he wants me to give a speech and if that's what he wants then i'll give it, no problem"
The pair looked at the man in front of them who was smiling
"Anyway, I think I over stayed already, I still have work to do so i'm leaving", Jihoon got up from the comfy brown couch and made his way towards the door and before Seungcheol and Jeonghan could say anything else, Jihoon was already out.
Jihoon stood infront of the glass window.
It was 3AM in the morning - most people were already fast asleep but to him, it was still early and the night is still young.
Jihoon loved a lot of things, he loves his job, he gets to write songs and it was a piece of cake to him. He loves his apartment, the view specifically, he gets to see an over view of the lights every night and there are no tall buildings blocking his view from the night sky. He loves his friends, Jihoon admits that he's one tough cookie to crack that's why when he met Soonyoung, Seungcheol, Jeonghan and Wonwoo he was glad he decided to let his walls down for once and let them in. But what he didn't love was the feeling he felt in his chest whenever Soonyoung was around.
When Jihoon met Soonyoung it was his first year in college. Out of all the students in class, Soonyoung stood out the most in Jihoon's eyes. Apart from his white hair, it was his smile that caught his eye in particular. At first he found it annoying because who would smile that big at 7AM in the morning. But when Soonyoung approached him and asked if he wanted to become seatmates for the rest of the first semester, he said yes. And to Jihoon, that was one of the best decisions he ever made in his life.
It was in their last year in college when Jihoon realized that the feeling in his chest whenever Soonyoung was around him wasn't because of annoyance. It took him that long to realize that through the years of having Soonyoung around, he actually fell in love with the loud, energetic slanted eyed boy.
Jihoon was confident about finally confessing to Soonyoung. Seungcheol gave him the pep talk and Jeonghan sat beside him cheering him up and encouraging him - he was so thankful to have the couple around.
The night he was about to confess, Jihoon received the "We need to talk" message from Soonyoung, he replied to the other saying that he needs to tell him something as well.
Seungcheol and Jeonghan wasn't expecting to see Jihoon in their apartment at 3AM in the morning, Jeonghan was about to scold him but before he could, Seungcheol asked him what happened
"He's dating Seokmin", was the only words Jihoon said that night.
Jihoon got accepted to Pledis right after they graduated college, he was happy. He felt like for once, the heavens finally agreed with him. He broke the news to his family and friends and everyone was as happy as he was. His family, feeling very proud of Jihoon threw a little party for him before he could leave and pack his bags for his move in 2 days.
"Why not just tell him," Wonwoo who was standing next to him with a cup in his hand said
No one knew how much he wanted to do it, but he just couldn't, he wasn't selfish enough to do that.
"He already looks happy," both Wonwoo and Jihoon looked at the other side of the room where Soonyoung was with Seokmin, "I want him to be happy, even if it's not with me." He simply said.
"But what about you? What about your happiness?"
Jihoon just smiled at Wonwoo and stood there silently, cup in hand while looking at everyone in the room.
Later that night, while he was cleaning up the mess in the living room Soonyoung asked him to talk, so they stepped outside away from everyone else.
"Ji, I really love Seokmin..."
I love you too but not in a platonic way
"Whenever I look for a flaw. I literally can't find one, he's that perfect ji..."
You're perfect in my eyes too Soonyoung
"I'm going to ask him to move in with me, do you think its a good idea?"
Jihoon stopped breathing for a second and looked at Soonyoung, who was waiting for an answer
"Honestly Soonyoung why do you even need my opinion in this," Jihoon was mad, annoyed and mostly sad but he never let any of those emotions show
"Your opinion matters because you are my bestfriend, I need you to tell me if i'm making a decision i'll regret in the future." Soonyoung stared at him, his smile was wide and his eyes were sparkling.
Jihoon felt like his heart just shattered all over again, he wanted to run away from Soonyoung, he was in the verge of breaking down but instead of doing that he encouraged Soonyoung to do it.
Weddings are suppose to be fun, well everyone is having fun except for Jihoon who has been silent through out the occasion. Wonwoo kept him company but he told him he was fine and pushed him to go to his date, Mingyu who Jihoon has talked to a few times. Jeonghan and Seungcheol checked up with him every now and then but he made it clear to the couple that he was fine, the couple knew not to push him anymore so they decided to not annoy him about it.
"And next we have the grooms bestfriend Lee Jihoon, who's going to give his speech", The MC announced
He looked at his friends who are seated in the same table as him, they all gave Jihoon a nod as if they're saying it's now or never, just do it.
Jihoon got up, his hands were ice cold and clammy
"Hello everyone, i'm Lee Jihoon i've known Soonyoung ever since our first year in college," the crowd gave him a smile and an ooh, "Soonyoung was like a sore thumb in the crowd, he always stood out the most wherever he goes, maybe it's because of his colorful hair or his odd choices of clothing," he looked over at the newly wed couple who was smiling at Jihoon, Soonyoung's eyes were shining bright at him.
"I never expected to be friends with Soonyoung, he looked like the complete opposite of me, so when he asked if i wanted to be his seatmate for the whole first semester, before my brain could even process the question i already said yes," the crowd laughed, jihoon was silent for a couple of seconds before continuing
it's now or never jihoon
"Choosing the person you want to share your life with is one of the most important decisions any of us makes, ever. Because when it's wrong, it turns your life into grey. And sometimes, sometimes you don't even notice until you wake up one morning and realize years have gone by." Jihoon looked up, to see people staring at him and his friends specifically Jeonghan wiping his tears while Seungcheol patted his head, before continuing he locked eyes with his bestfriend, "Soonyoung, your friendship has brought glorious technicolor in my life. It's been there even in the darkest of times. and I am the luckiest person alive for that gift. I hope I didn't take it for granted. I think, maybe I did. Because sometimes, you don't see that the best thing that's ever happened to you is sitting there, right under your nose. But that's fine too. It really is. Because no matter where you are or what you're doing, or who you're with, I will always, honestly, truly, completely, love you."
Jihoon broke eye contact with Soonyoung. He looked at the crowd in front of him then to Seokmin who was staring at him, wide eyed. Soonyoung was silently staring at Jihoon with tears streaming down his face. And before anyone could say something, Jihoon went down from the small makeshift stage and ran away from the venue.
Away from everyone, away from Soonyoung.