Chapter Text
Dan couldn't believe what he was doing. It was reckless, stupid, dangerous even. But he had to. He had to really live, even if only for a weekend.
He closed his eyes, enjoying the train’s gentle rumble beneath him. It was the sound of being alive, he thought. Then he mentally laughed at himself for being so pretentious.
Dan took a deep breath as a voice over the intercom announced that they were nearing the station. Doubts flooded his mind again as he thought of how reckless this really was. His parents were going to freak out.
The train pulled up to the platform and Dan got to his feet, trying to ignore how much his legs were shaking. Deep breaths, he told himself. He needed to be calm.
He gripped the strap of his bag tightly enough to whiten his knuckles, it kept his hands from shaking.
The platform was crowded and for a moment Dan’s vision blurred around the edges. He gasped in a breath, forcing himself to just stay calm.
“It’s holding me, morphing me...” Dan whispered the Muse lyrics under his breath. It helped. Muse always helped to keep him level.
He was focusing on keeping his heart rate even and didn't notice the dark-haired guy until he actually collided with him.
“Dan?” a voice asked as Dan stumbled backwards a step.
“Phil?” Dan looked up into blue eyes and a smiling face. Before he could say anything else he was enveloped in a hug.
“Hi!” Phil said as he let Dan go, still smiling.
Dan felt the corners of his mouth pull up.
“Hi,” he answered back, feeling suddenly shy and awkward. He looked down, hunching his shoulders a bit. He hated being so tall.
Phil led the way out of the station, babbling about what they could do for the weekend and how nice it is to finally meet Dan in person. Dan couldn't help but smile. Phil’s good mood was contagious.
Dan had stumbled onto Phil’s YouTube channel a couple of months ago, and it had instantly become his favourite. In person, Phil was even more vibrant than on camera. Dan felt himself relaxing, he was surprised by how comfortable he felt beside the older boy.
They had lunch in a cozy cafe close to Phil’s flat. It was halfway through the meal when Phil asked That Question. Dan was expecting it, but he had been dreading his answer since he got on the train.
“So,” Phil took a sip of his drink, “what’s your Ability?”
For a moment Dan considered lying. But this was Phil. He took a deep breath, then held out his hand, palm up.
A shadow seemed to curl from Dan’s palm, twisting through his fingers. He touched a fingertip to the plant on the table. The branch he touched instantly withered.
Dan looked up at Phil, dread pooling in his stomach. Phil’s eyes were wide, his mouth slightly open.
“I’ve never seen that before,” Phil breathed, looking at Dan, who felt horrible. He shouldn’t have shown Phil. His Ability was an abomination, something evil.
“I’d trade it for yours any time.” Dan murmured, sure that Phil would ask him to go.
But instead Phil just smiled. “I get why you were so reluctant to visit now.”
Relief was not a strong enough word for what Dan felt in that moment.
“I’m dangerous,” Dan said in a whisper. “I should be locked up.”
Suddenly Dan couldn’t keep the words in anymore. “Phil, I shouldn’t be here. What if I hurt someone? What if I hurt you? I should go back home.”
Dan was getting to his feet, looking for his wallet to pay for his food, but Phil grabbed his sleeve, tugging him back down.
“Don’t be silly, Dan. You’re not gonna hurt me. So please sit down and finish your lunch. We’ll talk about this back at my flat, okay?”
Dan nodded, but kept his eyes on the table, willing his heart rate to slow. Getting upset only made it harder to keep his Ability under control.
~
On the other side of the cafe, unnoticed by either boy, a man got up from his chair and walked out the door.