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Hua Cheng had only stepped away for an hour, making sure Xie Lian was fully asleep before doing so, to take care of a minor matter, but when he returned his husband was gone.
His stomach dropped for just a moment at the silence he walked into before settling back down. He knew Xie Lian liked to wander when something was on his mind but…he also had a habit of finding trouble, even now.
So again, his stomach dropped before his anxiety began to rise.
He began to search the small shack that his husband insisted they reside in for most of their time, but that didn’t take long considering it only consisted of a main open room, one storage room, and a kitchen. No sign of him turning up so back out the front door he went.
He really couldn’t leave Xie Lian alone for a moment, could he?
“Gege?” He called out just loud enough to pass through the open area that surrounded the shack. His head snapped back and forth for any sign of movement.
Not even a breeze rustling the treeline. This was useless.
Closing his eye, he took one deep breath and focused. He really had to stop letting himself get worked up anytime Xie Lian was out of his sight. Xie Lian HAD asked him so sweetly to stop his worrying. But alas, here he was doing just that. He would deal with himself once he located his husband. That memory still floated back, distracting him.
‘You need to keep in mind that I am very unlikely to die.’ He had spoken ever so softly as he flitted around their garden.
‘But Gege can still be injured. What am I to do then?’ He tried not to whine then, really, but it always came out when they talked about this.
Xie Lian had turned to look at him over his shoulder, giving Hua Cheng the SOFTEST smile. His eyes were soft, yet crinkling up at the corners. His nose even gave a tiny wrinkle! Hua Cheng was ready to bow down at his feet, completely forgetting what they were talking about and accepting of whatever Xie Lian asked of him next.
‘Ah, San Lang, you will just have to nurse me back to health if that happens. Take care of all my needs until I am full of health again.’ He even had the beautiful nerve to let out a soft and playful laugh.
So Hua Cheng rushed forth and blanketed him in a hug and whined until Xie Lian ran his hand through his hair, soothing his worries away.
Taking another deep breath in the present, he felt around the area with his mind, trying to sense him.
Listening closely, he could catch the faintest melody being hummed off in the distance.
His eye snapped open.
A warm smile started to spread across his face as he followed the tune through the woods, heading in the direction of the river. The anxiety of the past few minutes faded just as quickly as it came, but it remained there under the surface.
He slowed his pace once he spied Xie Lian’s figure perching on a rock, legs crossed delicately underneath himself. The tune is still being hummed.
Normal human ears would have had a hard time picking it out, but Hua Cheng was not normal and was so very attuned to Xie Lian. He would be able to find the owner of that voice on the other side of the world.
Keeping his footsteps hidden, he approached the rock, but did not make a move to climb atop it. Instead he stood by the waters edge a few feet away. Just enough to fall into Xie Lian’s field of vision.
Hua Cheng closed his eye. As he listened to the tune slowly come to an end, he took in the fresh crisp air of the river. Then, the gentlest of sighs from atop that rock.
“Ah, San Lang, you found me.” Xie Lian sounded slightly embarrassed at getting caught away from home and singing. But not embarrassed enough to have stopped when he noticed he had company.
Hua Cheng opened his eye, slowly turning to face his husband. “I will always find you.” He stated as a fact.
Xie Lian’s face softened into that heart melting smile he reserved for his husband. “As expected of my great San Lang. I have nothing to worry about.” He let out a tiny laugh, but the sound was off as if he meant the last part to only be heard by himself. It did not get past Hua Cheng.
He took one step towards the rock, face hardening with worry. “Gege-”
Xie Lian held up a hand, silencing him. He tried again, his smile growing warmer and just as soft. Yet, he still let out a sigh, dropping the hand. “I can’t hide a thing from you.” He patted the rock next to himself, inviting.
Hua Cheng instantly was seated next to him, grasping at Xie Lian’s hands, rubbing soothing circles over his porcelain skin. “Gege-” He tried, but again was stopped by Xie Lian.
But not with a hand, for both of his were still being held in both of Hua Cheng’s.
Oh no no no, this time he was silenced with the lightest of kisses. Hua Cheng would have missed it if his eyes had not been open.
And boy did they open wider. Before he lost his chance, he leaned in closer to feel them connect.
Once he saw Xie Lian’s eyelids flutter shut, only then did he close his own. Hua Cheng would never get used to the warmth of Xie Lian’s kisses, his touches, him.
Hua Cheng released his hold on Xie Lian’s hands, but didn’t dare reach out. Even after so much, he feared crossing any boundaries unless his husband took the first step. Leading the way.
And oh he always did. Xie Lian’s hands quickly found their way around Hua Cheng’s neck, pulling their chests ever so closer.
His warm hands caressed the back of his neck, gently scratching and smoothing over the hair there.
Hua Cheng hummed in content and melted closer, his own hands finally coming to rest on his husband’s waist.
The second he made contact with the fabric there, Xie Lian scooted closer on the rock. Their mouths briefly parted with the shift and Hua Cheng took the moment to brush the faintest of kisses across the skin of his face. Not leaving any part untouched by his lips.
Xie Lian’s face heated right up under the attention and he pulled Hua Cheng’s mouth back to his before he could see the blush.
Hua Cheng was not going to object.
They took the moment to just be with each other, like this. Close and intimate. It can’t be said that it’s a rare sight of the two, with how much Hua Cheng prefers to stay by Xie Lian’s side. They are bound to end up tangled together in some way. Some form of contact.
But there is always something to bring them back to the moment. And this time, it’s Hua Cheng’s simmering worry.
As hard as Xie Lian tries to hide any negative emotion or feeling from his husband, he always sniffs it out.
Hua Cheng slowed the kiss before pulling back and resting his forehead against Xie Lian’s.
Xie Lian let out a slow sigh that tickled Hua Cheng’s skin due to their closeness. “San Lang…” His voice is half a warning, a half a plea.
“Gege, just relax and tell me what is bothering you.” He pulls away and moves to lay Xie Lian comfortably on the rock with his head in Hua Cheng’s lap. He doesn’t fight it. He never does when Hua Cheng is filled with this much concern and worry.
Xie Lian smiled, but there is no light behind his eyes. Only a fading flush left on his cheeks.
Hua Cheng begins to run his hands through his husband's hair, massaging his scalp, trying any way he can to ease the tension in Xie Lian’s body and mind.
His next words are spoken softly, just between them. “Gege can tell me what is bothering him or not. I will not press you. Just…” his voice takes on the air of the worry that had been hanging on him since he returned to find their shack empty, “I tried not to leave you for long and yet when I walked in, Gege had snuck off. The bed was even cold.” He looked away, pouting. “I just want to help Gege in any way that I can, but if you won’t tell me what has kept you up and away…”
Xie Lian reached a hand up to caress his husband’s cheek, turning his face back to look down at him where he lay. His thumb brushed across his cheek, trying to sooth him right back.
“It’s the middle of the night, pitch black without the moon and you were out here all alone…” Hua Cheng laid on the pitiful voice, eyes still averted.
Xie Lian let out a gentle laugh and one that finally sounds genuine. Stroking his cheek until Hua Cheng met his eyes. “I have worried you. I should be the one telling you to not worry. Ah, I am always reminding San Lang of this.”
Xie Lian scrunched up his nose and pinched Hua Cheng’s cheek when he opened his mouth to plead again.
Hua Cheng winced even though the pinch barely registered.
They laid like that for a few moments, just staring at each other as time stretched between them. They always had time. This ended up happening frequently, neither one of them willing to be the first to give in. Both stubborn to a fault and exceptionally so towards each other.
Eventually, Hua Cheng’s hands started to move through Xie Lian’s hair again. He took his time and turned his focus on braiding intricate pieces into his husband's hair. He often did this when there was something on his mind...or he was pouting.
Like currently. Xie Lian closed his eyes, knowing Hua Cheng would not let it drop. Knowing he would bring it up even weeks later. He smiled, thinking of how much his husband cared for him, even if it was over something so minor.
And it was something minor, he was just too stubborn and this had gotten out of hand already. Bringing it up now it would seem silly.
But he also knew his husband did not mind his silly small things. As far as things that concerned Xie Lian, Hua Cheng was all ears. Willing to pout for days until he got permission to ease Xie Lian’s silly worries.
Xie Lian was starting to relax, as Hua Cheng intended with his actions. He found his breathing was beginning to slow and grow deeper.
Hua Cheng smiled silently to himself. If he couldn’t get Xie Lian to talk, then he would get him to sleep. He took his time arranging his husband's hair into uniform braids that weaved together. Once he noticed the tell tale signs of a sleeping Xie Lian, he finished his braiding and shifted his husband into his arms, careful not to wake him.
Hopping down from the rock with silent ease, he made his way back through the woods. As he walked he tried, he really did, to keep his mind focused off of his worry. He knew it was becoming ridiculous and yet that’s why it kept nagging at him. His husband, too often, would brush off his own concerns for the concerns of others. Being married to such a man was both rewarding and frustrating…
But Hua Cheng loved that frustration. It fueled him to try and pull the truth from Xie Lian in any way he could. Plus, he would end up getting bathed in attention when he eventually resorted to pouting and sulking. He was never above begging for his husband’s attention.
Shouldering the front door open before noiselessly kicking it shut behind him, he made his way with Xie Lian to the bed they had set the back corner. But he didn’t lay him down. Not yet.
Hua Cheng stood there, facing the bed, but his attention was on the sleeping man in his arms. When he slept, Xie Lian was the living picture of a heavenly god. Hua Cheng’s heavenly god. His skin was so so smooth and flawless. You would never think he knew hardship, and yet he had gone through many lifetimes worth of such struggle. Here, asleep in his arms, he saw that young prince who only knew a privileged life and still went out of his way to help others. His face was peaceful, beautiful, innocent.
Leaning his own face down, Hua Cheng took his time, they always had time, and kissed his nose, both cheeks, forehead, eyelids and finally the faintest of pecks on his husband’s ever so soft lips.
Xie Lian’s sleepy eyes fluttered open to meet Hua Cheng’s dark one. “Ah, we are home.”
“Gege fell asleep.”
“San Lang lulled me to sleep.” Xie Lian smiled up at him while snuggling closer in his arms. “You are a cheater.”
Hua Cheng chuckled a half hearted sound. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he held Xie Lian closer to his chest like they both wanted. “Gege hurts me.” He teased. “I only wanted you to finally rest. You rarely rest though we have all the time in the world.”
Xie Lian shook his head in a small motion, not wanting to fully move his face away from Hua Cheng’s chest. “That time could be spent so much better. You don’t need rest, so why should I rest.”
Hua Cheng rolled his eye and shifted them on the bed to lean against the pillows. With the new position, Xie Lian moved to rest his lower body between his husband’s legs while his upper body clung and cuddled his chest. He hummed in content mimicking Hua Cheng’s earlier sound. “Ah, but resting with you does sound good right now.”
Hua Cheng let out another amused chuckle, tightening his arms around him. “Sleep and morning will come. I will not leave again.”
“Mn, I have no doubt about that.” Xie Lian’s voice was fading out as sleep took him again.
Hua Cheng sighed, but not in defeat, he would wait while his husband slept. He could always wait.
When morning rolled around and Xie Lian opened his eyes, he was greeted by a light kiss to his forehead. He made a sound of acknowledgement and lifted his head from Hua Cheng’s chest. He had not moved from his hold all night. His eyes held a sparkle to them in the morning light, evidence left behind of him being well rested. “Good morning.” His voice still held a bit of grogginess, though.
Hua Cheng gave him a sincere smile. “Good morning, Gege. Did you sleep well?” His hand started to move against Xie Lian’s back in a soothing motion.
Xie Lian nodded his head before dropping it back to Hua Cheng’s chest. “San Lang is too good to me. I will always rest well when in his embrace.”
With the mild praise, Hua Cheng’s face heated up, though the color stayed his normal pale. His wide eye being the only thing giving away his excitement.
Xie Lian giggled, actually giggled, as he reached his hand up to wrap around Hua Cheng’s neck, pulling his face closer. He nuzzled against his neck, something only reserved for sleepy mornings between them. “I’ve worried you.” He spoke softly against his skin.
He could feel Hua Cheng’s jaw move to object, so he began to kiss along it, shocking him silent again.
“We do this over and over.” Xie Lian sighed between kisses.
Hua Cheng broke his silence anyways. “Gege just needs to say what is on his mind and I will take care of it.”
Xie Lian buried his face against the skin of Hua Cheng’s neck, not speaking. Again, they stayed there in the silence. Waiting for the other.
Minutes pass before Xie Lian begins to move again. The movement freezes Hua Cheng in place as he was not expecting his husband to start slowly kissing a trail up his neck, the motion stopping at his jaw. He relaxes under his husband.
But then his breath catches in his throat the moment Xie Lian begins his trail of kisses again. This time his lips traveled to his ear where he paused, breath tickled against his skin pulling a shudder out of Hua Cheng.
Xie Lian gave his ear one soft kiss before whispering. “It’s all silly. I should feel ashamed at how silly I was. Should...but I don’t feel ashamed. I could never feel ashamed at how much I missed San Lang when he was away.”
Hua Cheng closed his eye, the corners of his lips pulling up.
Xie Lian continued his mild verbal assault on his husband’s ears and heart. “I was restless as I fell asleep, tossing and turning. I thought it only lasted a few minutes before I awoke to an empty bed.” He let out a long sigh that brought a sort of groan out of Hua Cheng’s chest.
“Gege, I-” He started to launch into his apologies.
Xie Lian nipped his ear and Hua Cheng gasped, shutting him up again.
“I couldn’t help but feel a slight disappointment. Where had you gone off to? Did something happen? Did someone find you here? Were you dragged away? Was this the end?” He laughed hauntedly, the sound bordering on mocking. But he was mocking himself.
“All that crossed my mind. Then of course I came to my senses. San Lang would never leave me in the middle of the night. He knows I would turn this world over to bring him back to me as I know he would do the same.” This laugh was light as the weight finally started to lift from admission.
Xie Lian dropped his head to Hua Cheng’s shoulder, relaxing. “Silly. Your gege is silly, San Lang.” The hand that rest on the other shoulder moved to card his fingers through his husband’s hair. “Silly, but not ashamed to worry about you the same way you worry about me. So…” His voice dropped deeper, serious as the hand in his hair fisted but not pulling hard. “You will take me along with you in the future or you will make me aware of your departure.”
Hua Cheng didn’t dare move as he replied. “If that is what Gege needs, then I will comply.”
A moment passed before Xie Lian relaxed against him fully, his hand going back to idly playing with Hua Cheng’s hair. “See...I was being silly as always. You need not worry about me so much for now you know just how much I worry in return.”
Hua Cheng chuckled, chest shaking Xie Lian with the movement. “Gege is very silly. So am I it would seem. But something tells me that neither of us will stop being silly. And we are so very unlikely to die. Thus, we are stuck being silly and worried over each other forever.”
“Together.” Xie Lian hums against his shoulder.
Hua Cheng nodded and kissed the top of his husband’s head. “I will keep that in mind in the future.”
Xie Lian snuggled closer still. “Yes, I hope that San Lang remains by my side. No secrets between us. No adventure not shared.” He leaned in again to ghost a kiss across Hua Cheng’s jaw. “I love you always.”
“I’ll love you more.” Hua Cheng holds him tighter.
“I will never doubt that, my San Lang. I will just have to catch up.”