Chapter Text
track one
2009
“Hey Gun. Wake up!” Off tapped Gun’s shoulder. There was no response, the latter was sleeping peacefully burrowed in a heavy blanket.
“Gun. Wake up.” Off leaned in, his body almost covering Gun. “Gun. Gun. Wakey-wakey.”
“For God’s sake, Off.” Gun whined as he shot his eyes open. Off’s smiling face was inches away from him. He suddenly became conscious so he lightly pushed him away. He looked at the time as he propped himself up, it was already past midnight. His eyes darted to Off who was now on the foot of the bed, tuning his guitar.
“You know what, if our neighbors don’t know who you are, they would have probably called the police whenever you climb your way up here through our balcony,” Gun said as he closed the sliding door.
This is not the first time Off woke Gun during the wee hours of the day or sneaked in to his room by climbing up the balcony. When they were young, Off would climb in using a stepladder just to recite the poems he’ve composed and now that they’re nearing their high school graduation, Off, who can now climb up the balcony without a stepladder wakes up Gun just to sing him his ‘songs’ – his old poems which he tried to turn into songs by adding in a tune. Gun would sound whiny about Off disturbing his sleep but they both know he’ll still leave the sliding door unlocked.
Off only does this to Gun despite them all growing up together with Alice, Arm, and New. He thinks he’s helping Gun improve his spelling and overall skill in language by reciting him his poems full of word play. Gun on the other hand likes it not just because he’s really learning but he also likes the notion that he’s the first person Off goes to when he finishes something, like a school kid seeking approval from his beloved teacher.
Off was good with words which was not surprising given that his parents were both Literature professors and their house has a small library filled with novels, childrens books, and magazines not just written in Thai but also in English, Japanese, and Chinese. While growing up, they’d come over to his house over the weekends and ask Off’s mom to read fairy tales written in English. They didn’t quite understood it yet but the pictures helped. This made all of them quite knowledgeable in understanding and speaking in English as they grew up with Off, Tay, and Alice being the most fluent.
“So, did you write a song?” Gun asked as he sat beside Off who was now lightly strumming its strings. They’ve been talking for over a month now how Off has long wanted to write a song but finds it hard to come up with chord progression and melodies. He thinks his poems aren’t fit to be converted into a song to which Gun would only just shrug as he doesn’t know anything about music but he’d always say ‘you can do it’ to Off.
“Nah. I’m still having a hard time writing something that’s meant to be sang.”
“So what did you come here for waking me up at this ungodly hour?” Gun asked in an irritated tone as he playfully hit him with his pillow. “And don’t give me that excuse. You’ve already written a song three years ago.”
“That song was different,” Off replied as he played along and dramatically laid on the bed hugging his guitar as Gun repeatedly hit him. “Well I tried incorporating a tune to one of my old poem,” Off was a bit hesitant to continue and scolded himself when he realized his mistake just now, “Remember that poem I did for a school presentation for Mother’s Day?”
It was a sensitive subject of conversation but of course Gun remembered it. They were on their fifth grade and their school held a short mandatory program to commemmorate Mother’s Day. “Hmm. Okay let’s hear it,” Gun said, nodding.
Off got up and started strumming the strings then proceeded to sing softly.
Jasmine wreaths bought for you
Mae I love you
Not just on Mother’s Day
But also tomorrow and forevermore
But most especially today
We make merits together
So we can live alongside each other
Mae I love you
Thank you for being there with me.
For the short time Off sang, Gun was looking at him the whole time. Off on the other hand was looking at his hands, becoming conscious as Gun looked at him intently. He has always been the center of attention at school due to him always being chosen to recite poems or do some speeches just because he can articulate Thai words well. But despite all that, he’s still nervous when he’s in front of a small or big audience.
“So?” Off asked, raising his eyebrows as he looked at Gun who has now lain beside him. He set down his guitar on the foot of the bed, his guitar that he leaves here at Gun’s bedroom because of situations like this. Off laid beside him, a bit hesitant as his heartbeat quickened. He shouldn’t be this nervous laying down beside Gun because they’ve always done this ever since they were kids. But ever since they spent that sorrowful night three years ago crying together, Off had suddenly felt shy towards Gun, becoming conscious when they’re alone together, being more aware of Gun’s presence like now.
“The melody’s nice. I don’t know how to explain it but as you were playing it, I feel kind of warm and I see white all over you. I don’t know if that makes sense but yeah. I also kind of suddenly smell jasmines of course, as soon as you sang it,” Gun answered, his small hands making gestures in the air as he tried to explain his thoughts. “It can also pass off as some children’s song.”
“Hmm. So, does that give you a good feeling?” Off asked as he looked at the ceiling, trying to calm down. He can feel his hands becoming sweaty and his ears felt hot.
“Yes, it does,” Gun said mid-yawn. “Will you stay here for the night? Please say yes because I don’t wanna wake dad if I let you out on the front door.”
Off tilted his head, puzzled that Gun wasn’t the least bit angry on the possibility that Off will ask him to sleep over.
“Huh. This is like the first time you were okay with me sleeping over. You even suggested it. Did you really liked the song that much that you were willing to let me sleep here?” Off teased as he propped himself up with his elbow. Gun shot him a look which made him laugh. Gun likes it when Off laughs in a semi-high pitched tone, like an innocent child getting all giddy on their birthday.
“Anyway, I’m sorry,” Off whispered after a minute of silence.
“What are you saying sorry for?” Gun questioned him but they both know the reason why he’s saying it. “I’m getting real sleepy now. Good night, Off,” Gun said as he closed his eyes, pulling his blanket over him.
Off laid down beside him and whispered before closing his eyes, “Good night, Gun.”