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On a Friday night, a normal mated couple would usually be spending time with each other, especially when the omega had recently given birth to a beautiful baby girl. Unfortunately, Yamaguchi Tadashi and his alpha Tsukishima Kei seemed to be doing anything but. Yamaguchi walked over to the couch with his daughter in his arms where his mate was sitting, frantically typing away on his sleek black laptop, wire-framed glasses slowly slipping down the bridge of his sharp nose as he squinted at the glowing screen. “Kei, do you want to go out for dinner later today?”
Tsukki glanced at him distractedly before turning back to his laptop, absentmindedly pushing his glasses up his nose with the tip of his middle finger. “No, I don’t have time, I need to work.”
Yamaguchi’s attention was divided between talking to his alpha and keeping a firm grip on his daughter, who had started squirming in his arms. Mizuki was only two months old, but damn, was she strong. They were sure she was going to be an alpha, even though they wouldn’t truly know until she presented when her body was ready. “It’s only Friday, surely you can spare a few hours?”
“No, I have to finish this by Monday.” Tsukki jerked his head slightly like he was shooing away an irksome fly.
“Come on, Kei, you have three days.”
“I want to make sure I do this properly. This presentation could get me a promotion.”
“But you’re hardly around at al-“
“Because I’m working! While I’m working my ass off for you night and day, all you’re doing is lazing around at home with Mizuki!” Tsukki huffed in irritation. His temper had been stretched to its breaking point all week from dealing with irresponsible colleagues and unreasonable clients. He didn’t have the patience to deal with this, too.
Yamaguchi didn’t know what he did wrong, but it was obvious that his alpha was very agitated. He had never seen Tsukki like this, not even before a big volleyball game. “But-“
“I said I don’t have time for you right now, Tadashi!” Tsukki finally looked up and glared at his mate.
Oh. Oh no. The bespectacled man was suddenly hyper-aware of the way his canines were fully extended and bared at the two people he loved most, the way his lip was curling up into a vicious sneer, the way his blood thrummed under his skin in anger. What was worse, though, were the scared pheromones from his mate and daughter spreading throughout the room, smashing into Tsukki like a brick wall. No, they had already permeated the entire house, he was just too insensitive to take notice before. There were tears in both Yamaguchi’s and Mizuki’s eyes, and their daughter was starting to wail because she was absolutely terrified of that big, scary, screaming alpha that she thought might attack at any moment. She instinctively snuggled closer to Yamaguchi for protection, crying into her mother’s chest and clutching at his loose T-shirt. Yamaguchi was obviously trying to calm himself down so he wouldn’t scare the baby girl further, judging from the way that the anxious pheromones in the room stopped increasing marginally. There was wariness in the way he was holding Mizuki to his chest protectively, his chocolate eyes wide and watery, slowly backing away from his angry mate. Oh fuck. Tsukki’s expression went from hostile to shocked to frantic as he realised what he had done. He had yelled at his mate and his daughter. He had bared his fangs at them, for fuck’s sake. What have I done?
Yamaguchi turned around and disappeared up the staircase which led to the upper floor of their house, and needless to say, Tsukki followed. Chucking his laptop to the side, he scrambled off the couch and rushed after his mate, the project that he had been working so hard on just a few minutes ago cast aside and forgotten. He got to the corridor just in time to see the door of the bedroom that he shared with his daughter and mate slam shut, the unmistakable sound of the lock sliding into place ringing out a few seconds after. Tsukki ran forward and raised his fist to bang on the door, but he unfurled his hand at the last second before it made contact with the wood, opting, instead, to spread his palm flat against the matte, lacquered surface to prevent scaring Yamaguchi and Mizuki more. Tsukki was scared too. He was scared of what he had become. He was a monster in his own eyes, nothing more than one of those controlling, abusive alphas who he had sworn never to become, the ones who did whatever they wanted and treated their omegas however they liked with no consideration for their feelings, or kindness, or love at all. His mate and daughter were gifts, his family was a gift, Tsukki knew that. They were a privilege. One that he had just proved to be unworthy of. Tsukki started crying as two sad, scared scents drifted out from the crack under the door, but perhaps what hurt, even more, was the thick, cloying wave of disappointment from his omega that burned as it filled his lungs. Tsukki used the pain to keep him sane. He knew he deserved it. He knew how bad he had fucked up. He was scared of what he had lost just because he couldn’t keep his temper in check. He was terrified of the way his mate was surely going to look at him, with hate and anger and fear, with disgust. Why wouldn’t he? A sob wrenched its way out of Tsukki’s raw throat, his jaw clenched tight as he tried desperately to control his pheromones and his tears. “T-Tadashi? Tadashi, please open the door. I’m sorry, just please open the door, please !” His first instinct was to fix the mess he had made, to comfort his mate and daughter. It hurt to know that they were scared and afraid, and there was nothing he could do to put them at ease except releasing as many calming, apologetic pheromones as he could, because he was the one who had caused their fear in the first place. “I’m sorry, I would never hurt you or Mizuki, just please open the door. Let me comfort you, please .” Tsukki sucked in a shuddering breath when Yamaguchi didn’t answer, trying to get his sobs under control. “I don’t know what came over me, just please know that I would never hurt you, either of you, I swear. I’m sorry, just please tell me you’re both okay, Tadashi. Please tell me that you’re okay.”
There was still no reply. Tears still streaming down his face, Tsukki sank to his knees on the ground, his forehead pressed against the wooden door, and a wave of nausea hit him like a punch to the gut when he heard muffled cries coming from his terrified daughter and the sounds of his mate trying to soothe her. Mizuki was scared of her own father and it was all his fault. Oh god. That was her first real impression of me, wasn’t it? That I’m a monster. Someone she can’t let her guard down around, someone she needs to be wary of. God, how could I fuck up so badly? He yanked his glasses off, pushing the heels of his palms over his eyes. Why did I not take care of her and Tadashi? They should have been my first priority. They should have been. Why did I push them aside for work? A failure. I’m such a failure. I’m an alpha and I can’t even treat my family right.
After a while, Tsukki calmed down and turned around to sit with his back against the door, but his mind was still running at full speed, trying to think of a way to make it up to Yamaguchi and Mizuki. Eventually, after around forty-five minutes, he toppled backwards as Yamaguchi swung the door open wearing his best jeans, a pretty, flowy blouse and black kitten heels, striding out with Mizuki on his hip. Tsukki scrambled to his feet. “T-Tadashi, where are you going? I’ll come with you, I-“
“No. I want some time alone with my daughter. Or are you going to take that away from me, too?” Yamaguchi’s expression and demeanour were colder than Tsukki had ever seen, which was saying a lot since they were childhood friends. “Don’t try to fix things only after you fuck up.” With that, Yamaguchi padded down the stairs, and Tsukki heard the door swing open and slam shut, his mate stepping out of the house with no hints as to where he was going.
Tsukki couldn’t calm down. Whatever little semblance of serenity he had regained while he was outside the bedroom had been shattered with the slam of the front door. Where’s he going, dressed like that? What if another alpha tries to touch him? No, he’s mine. Mine. Tsukki didn’t realise he was growling, his hackles raised, worried, anxious pheromones seeping through the house. What if he gets hurt? What if our daughter gets hurt? He was just about to run down the stairs after his mate before he realised that he had no right to. If space was what Yamaguchi wanted, Tsukki could give him space. It was the least he could do, to respect his omega’s wishes, and Yamaguchi would ensure Mizuki’s safety, of that he was sure. He refused to become one of those overly possessive alphas who dictated every aspect of their mate’s life, from what they ate, to where they went, to what they wore and whom they saw. They treated their mates like pets, and Tsukki knew that his mate and daughter deserved to be treated like royalty because that was what they were to him. His queen and his little princess. A king was nothing without his queen, not the other way around. He saw that now. Is this what Tadashi feels like every time I come back late from the office without telling him? And all I said when he looked exhausted was that he needed to sleep more. What the fuck is wrong with me?! Tsukki panicked for a little while longer before he finally got his shit together and called Daichi, the only other bonded alpha he knew who he trusted and had a kid of his own. He paced as he waited for his ex-volleyball captain to pick up, barely waiting for the dial tone to cut off before the words were pouring out of his mouth. “I fucked up and I need your help.”
Daichi had never heard Tsukishima sound so agitated and frantic. “What’s wrong?”
Tsukki didn’t beat around the bush. “I yelled at Tadashi and Mizuki. I snarled at them, Daichi-san. I fucked up so bad and I don’t know how to fix it. Tadashi just went out with Zuki a while ago.”
After processing the information, Daichi really wanted to scream at the blond idiot, but he knew that that wasn’t what Tsukishima needed right then, not when he was still in his overprotective alpha headspace. “A while ago? How long exactly?”
“Umm, fifteen minutes, give or take?”
“Good. Basically, beg for forgiveness.”
“...Okay. And then?”
Daichi was surprised that Tsukishima didn’t question him. “You’re not gonna ask why? I’d thought you’d be humiliated.”
Tsukki snorted in mild derision. “At this point… I just want Tadashi to know how sorry I am. He was scared, Daichi-san. I made my daughter and my mate cry. I just want them to be okay. I’m fine if they don’t forgive me, I don’t deserve them. But I need them to be okay .”
Daichi raised his eyebrows in amusement, even though he knew that Tsukki couldn’t see him. “Alright. It’s only four, there’s time. Yamaguchi likes to eat french fries, right? Why don’t you cook him something?”
“...O-Okay. Thank you, Daichi-san.”
“Of course, Tsukishima. And I know how you feel. I made Suga cry, once. Just once, before we had Hayashi. I couldn’t even remember what we were fighting about. I just remembered watching tears roll down my mate’s face, his pain and sadness bleeding through the mate bond, and he wouldn’t let me comfort him. ...It broke me, Tsukishima. And I had no idea what to do to help him, to ease his pain, the pain that I had caused in the first place. But we worked it out, and now we have a son. You’ll be fine. Just follow your instincts, you’ve always had good ones. Tell Yamaguchi I said hi, will you?”
“I will. Thank you.”
Daichi smiled as Tsukki hung up. He’ll be fine.
*
Tsukki jumped when he heard the front door click. Hastily wiping his fingers on his apron and tugging it off, he adjusted the cutlery one last time, making sure the candle in the middle of the table was still lit. In the three hours that Yamaguchi had been gone, he’d scented the whole house, and the entire place positively reeked of calming, regretful, apologetic pheromones. Did I scent too much? What if he doesn’t like it? The door swung open. Oh crap, he’s here- Tsukki tried to look like he hadn’t been freaking out just seconds before, casually hiding the dishcloth in his hands behind his back as Yamaguchi walked into the kitchen with Mizuki on his hip. He took a discreet sniff, taking in the scent of grass and nature. The park. They went to the park. Tsukki breathed a sigh of relief when he saw that his mate and daughter were safe, but his heart kicked back up a notch when he saw Yamaguchi’s freckled nose twitch like he didn’t like the way something smelled. His face softened for a moment before his hard mask slipped back into place, glancing indifferently at the beautifully cooked fish & chips on the kitchen island (Tsukki had even made sure the fries were soggy), taking in the vanilla-and-lavender scented candle and the red napkins and silverware carefully set out. “I’m staying over at Yacchan’s.”
I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. “N-No, Tadashi, please, I’m sorry!” Mizuki started to squirm as Tsukki raised his voice.
“Well, I don’t care! How am I supposed to know that you won’t go back to ‘working your ass off’ as soon as we’re okay again?! I’m not even that mad that you screamed at me, I’m mad that you scared our daughter.” Before Tsukki could argue any more, he was already dashing up the stairs, clutching Mizuki close to his chest. Soon, he came back down, a leather duffle bag slung over one shoulder. “Goodbye, Kei.” Hitching the strap even more securely against his back with one arm around his daughter, Yamaguchi stepped out of the house for the second time that night.
Tsukki wasn’t a crying person. Never had been, never would be. He was always in control of his emotions, and he would never be so weak as to let himself cry. At least, that’s what he told himself as he dropped to his knees, the flats of his hands dragging down the side of the island, desperate to latch onto something, anything, to anchor himself. Why? That was the one question he kept asking himself. Why did he push them aside when they should have been his first priority? Why couldn’t he have controlled his temper? Why couldn’t he do anything right? He couldn’t get an answer, not from himself, nor anywhere or anyone else. He blindly reached up, fingertips searching for the edge of the black granite countertop and pulling himself up once he found it. He stared dazedly at the food, picking up the plate and half-heartedly shoving it into the fridge. What if he leaves me? What if he takes Mizuki? Tsukki would beg for forgiveness, but if his mate really wanted to take their daughter and leave…… He’d do everything to try and convince Yamaguchi not to, but he’d respect the omega’s choice. It was the least he could do. He closed the fridge and blinked, sticking a finger under his glasses to swipe at his blotchy skin as a heavy tear spilt from the inner corner of his eye, thinking about all the times Yamaguchi had asked him to take a break from work after Mizuki was born. And every single time, he’d said no. He’d refused. He’d stayed glued to his work, playing volleyball during the day and typing away on his laptop at night. He simply didn’t have time for his family anymore. But he should have made time. He should have made time and spent it with them. And now he might never get that chance again.
It felt like walking in a dream. Stumbling up the stairs, opening the bedroom door… It all felt like he was a puppet, his body controlled by the strings of fate. He tripped over to the closet that he and Yamaguchi shared, yanking the doors open and surveying the clothes that hung on the rack, Plunging his hands into Yamaguchi’s side of the closet, he dragged out piece after piece of fabric, all of them soaked through with the omega’s scent, tossing the whole lot onto their bed. He made to lie down, but after a second thought, made a short detour to Mizuki’s bassinet to grab the small pillow inside. He pressed it to his nose, breathing in the blend of his own and Yamaguchi’s scents, mixed with something that smelt like strawberries, sweet and fresh. He wearily sat down on the mattress, arranging all the clothes on the bed and making a nest. Nesting was usually only something omegas did, but their main purpose was to provide comfort, and damn did Tsukki need some comfort right now. If it made him look weak, so be it.
Closing his eyes with Mizuki’s pillow pressed to his nose, Tsukki curled up in a ball in the middle of a maelstrom of cloth, surrounded by his mate’s scent, but it would never compare to Yamaguchi’s actual presence. He cried, because he had made his mate and daughter feel scared and upset, and that was unacceptable. He couldn’t sleep that night, not really, not without the people he loved by his side, the ones that he had been taking for granted for so long.
*
The following Friday, Yamaguchi had been sitting at Yachi’s dining table with Mizuki in his lap when the blonde sat down beside him, a resolute gleam in her eyes. “Alright, I think you’ve tortured him for long enough.”
Yamaguchi raised his eyebrows, smiling bemusedly and bouncing Mizuki in his lap as she babbled. “Really? You’re the one who’s been adamant about me staying here so he’d learn his lesson.” Suga and Daichi had been checking up on Tsukki the whole week, updating Yamaguchi and Yachi about his situation, and according to them, the alpha was slowly losing his sanity.
Yachi snorted, widening her eyes comically. “Well, we know that he’s apparently been moping around the house all day and neglecting his work and is constantly sniffing at one of your clothing items, but we didn’t get the full picture, did we?”
Yamaguchi was getting a little worried now. “What do you mean?”
Unlocking her cell phone, Yachi opened her messaging app and shoved the screen in front of Yamaguchi’s face. “Suga just sent me this.”
Squinting his eyes slightly, Yamaguchi leaned forward to get a better look at the photo the blonde was showing him. A twang went through his heart at the sight of his alpha, even through a phone screen. Tsukki obviously hadn’t shaved for the week that Yamaguchi had been staying at Yachi’s house, and the stubble on his face was honestly too long to be called stubble anymore ( Huh. He looks better with a beard than I’d thought he would…… Focus, Tadashi. ). He was in the same clothes that he had been in since the day Yamaguchi left, a wrinkled grey T-shirt and loose shorts. The bags and dark circles under his eyes were easy to see even from the photo (which was saying something because Suga had obviously taken it in secret from far away), and his hair was sticking up every which way, a mess of sad, greasy yellow curls and waves. “He looks like a hobo.”
Yachi laughed through her nose. “No shit. ...As much as I hate to admit it, he needs you. You miss him too, don’t you?” she asked, as if she didn’t already know the answer, reaching over to steal Mizuki from the olive-haired omega’s arms.
The entire week, Yamaguchi had grown increasingly restless and distressed, and he hadn’t been sleeping well either. “Ugh… It’s been so hard! I miss him so much…” He flopped down onto the table, flinging his arms straight out across the length of it and plopping his face on top of them, turning his face to look at one of his best friends play with his daughter.
Yachi giggled as she cooed at Mizuki and smirked. “Your mommy and daddy are kinda dumb, aren’t they?” she grinned, rubbing Mizuki’s nose with her own.
“Hey!” Yamaguchi pouted, taking Mizuki back and wrinkling his nose playfully. “Trying to turn my own daughter against me so soon, Hitoka-chan?”
Yachi laughed again. “Go home, Dacchan. Go to him. He’s a train wreck.”
“...I’ll go back tonight,” Yamaguchi said seriously, leaning his daughter against his chest. He had missed Tsukki, a lot, but he wanted the alpha to learn his lesson. Oh well. He does look pretty miserable. I’d better get back before he starts crying… Chuckling mirthlessly to himself, Yamaguchi sent a quick thank-you text to Suga and Daichi and asked them to say hi to Hayashi for him, hitched Mizuki on his hip and went to pack his things.
*
Yamaguchi slid his keys into the lock on the front door, turning it and swinging the door open softly. He walked in and closed it, and he took a deep breath as his nose was filled with the heavy, cloying scent of his alpha’s regret and sadness and bitter heartache and so much salt (and no, I don’t mean salt in the way that Tsukki is usually a little bitch) that Yamaguchi almost felt guilty. Almost. It was obvious that Tsukki had been crying all over the place from the amount of tears that Yamaguchi smelt. “Kei?” He dropped the duffel bag on his shoulder to the foyer floor, walking further into the silent house as Mizuki wove inquisitive fingers into his hair. Tsukki wasn’t anywhere on the first floor, so Yamaguchi climbed up the stairs, and he knew that Tsukki was holed up in their bedroom when the smell of dark patchouli, salt, and sad, smoky incense got stronger. Supporting his daughter with one hand and turning the cold door handle with the other, Yamaguchi stepped into the bedroom, stopping short at the mess inside.
Tsukki was asleep in the middle of their king-sized bed, surrounded by Yamaguchi’s clothes; sweaters, hoodies, shirts, shorts, basically...everything. Oh, Kei… You idiot. As the omega walked closer, he could see the dried tear tracks on his alpha’s cheeks. Ambling over to the corner of the room, Yamaguchi gently placed a now-asleep Mizuki into her bassinet. I still can’t believe how fast she can nod off, she was awake when we got home. All of a sudden, he heard his mate stir. When he turned around, Tsukki was already stumbling off the bed, dropping to his knees in front of Yamaguchi, moving to wrap his arms around his omega’s waist. But he drew back, like he was...afraid. Does he really think that I’m still mad?
“T-Tadashi, I-” Tsukki licked his dry, cracked lips, trying to find the words that had so conveniently escaped him, his traitorous heart thundering wildly in his chest. Come on, Kei. You planned an entire speech, and you can’t even say any of it? You fucking idiot.
There was no denying that Tsukki was quick-witted, nor that he was clever. Seeing him reduced to this… Yamaguchi felt his lungs contract, the air wheezing out in an almost imperceptible whoosh. Now he definitely felt guilty. His alpha’s hair was so slicked with grease, it was obvious that he hadn’t washed it in ages. The omega leaned down to press a quick kiss to Tsukki’s forehead, brushing his too-long fringe away. “Go take a shower, then we’ll talk.” Tsukki was still too out of it to respond with anything more than a tentative nod.
The alpha grabbed a random set of pyjamas and stumbled into the bathroom, stripping out of his old clothes and tossing them into the laundry hamper. Dammit, dammit, why didn’t I pack up?! He glanced at his reflection in the mirror for the first time in a week, and was assaulted with the horrifying vision of a homeless hobo. Greasy hair, wrinkled clothes, cracked lips… He was the whole package and then some, not to mention the tacky tear tracks that had dried on his cheeks. He barely recognised himself even as he squinted at his reflection. Mmm. Nope. No can do. He could hear Yamaguchi bustling around outside, and prayed that his mate wasn’t assembling some sort of medieval torture device to maim him with once he went left the bathroom. Tsukki stepped into the shower, turning the water temperature up as high as it could go, standing right under the spray and letting the hot water soak him. It feels amazing to be clean again, he thought, when he finally stepped out of the shower, hair soft and fully restored to its previous fluffiness, muscles warm and limber from the heat of the water, face fresh and alert and clean-shaven (finally). He shook out the clothes he had haphazardly grabbed, pulling on the black T-shirt and thick white sweatpants, making sure the bathroom was tidy before he opened the door and stepped out.
Yamaguchi was lying on his side in one of Tsukki’s mustard-coloured oversized knit sweaters, the neckline falling off one shoulder and exposing the sharp cut of his collarbones, the freckles that Tsukki loved so much a constellation across his creamy skin. He was propped up on one elbow, Mizuki tucked to his chest as he reached out a hand to Tsukki. (There were no guillotines or iron maidens anywhere, thankfully.) The alpha walked to the bedside, cautiously laying down beside Yamaguchi with Mizuki sandwiched in between them. Yamaguchi must have changed the sheets and pillowcases and scented the whole room, because all Tsukki could smell was his mate’s scent of sweet vanilla and bergamot, and the faint strain of strawberry from Mizuki. He let himself relax slightly when he realised that Yamaguchi’s scent didn’t smell angry, it just smelt like...home. It smelt like home.
Tsukki stiffened up as Yamaguchi shuffled closer, until his mate poked his cheek gently, pressing a dimple into his skin. “I’m not gonna bite, y’know,” he whispered delicately, his fingers looping around Tsukki’s right wrist to guide his alpha’s arm over his hip. The next shock? He started purring. The sound vibrated through his body, deep and rich and low in his chest, strong enough that Tsukki could feel it through where his arm was draped over Yamaguchi’s side. Omegas only purred when they felt exceptionally happy, safe or content, or when they wanted to comfort their mates, and to be honest, Tsukki was perfectly okay with all four options.
Tsukki awkwardly cleared his throat. “I’m so sorry, Tadashi”
His mate looked up, contemplating him silently. “Don’t apologise to me, apologize to her.” He nodded towards Mizuki, who was half-asleep in his arms. Still hesitant, Tsukki scooped their daughter into his chest, and he felt his chest ache when Mizuki squirmed and struggled in his arms. She honestly just wasn’t really familiar with his scent yet, since he hadn’t spent much time with her (Tsukki would have slapped himself if he wasn’t holding her), but she eventually settled down when he instinctively let out soothing pheromones, leaning against his chest.
Tsukki tried to get his shaky breathing under control. He was holding a living, breathing child, his child, and he was feeling an entire barrage of emotions that would take aeons to pick apart, not that he was going to waste time trying. “I’m sorry, moonlight. Daddy’s sorry. ...He failed both you and mommy, huh?” Mizuki just stared up at her father, completely uncomprehending but still managing to look adorable at the same time.
Tsukki pulled Yamaguchi closer, kissing first his forehead, then their daughters. Something was still eating away at him, ever since he noticed the bedsheets had been changed. “Tadashi… I’m sorry if I scented the house too much that night, I’ll wash all the sheets and everything if you want me to. Please don’t think that I was trying to assert any sort of dominance or anything, I would never-”
Yamaguchi laughed, leaning forward to press a slow, sweet kiss to Tsukki’s lips to shut him up. “I know, it wasn’t that, I just- I smelled your tears. It was so hard not to just rush over into your arms and cry. But I had to make sure you learned your lesson,” he said lightly
Tsukki looked down at their daughter, her eyes already shut, little hands curled into fists against her face. “I did. I need to learn how to keep my temper in check, and I’m sorry for neglecting you and Zuki. ...You deserve better. You really do.”
“Mmm… But I only want you. So too bad.”
Tsukki laughed for the first time in days. “I love you, Tadashi. And you,” he mumbled, booping Mizuki’s nose with the tip of his own.
*
Yamaguchi was startled from his sleep by a piercing cry. Mizuki’s cry. He jolted up in the bed, already scrambling blearily around for their daughter, but he stilled when he saw that Tsukki was already awake, glasses sitting crooked on his nose, Mizuki cradled in his arms, shushing her gently. Or at least trying his best to. Yamaguchi scooted closer to his mate and daughter, sliding his arms snug around Tsukki’s waist and looking over his shoulder, their cheeks pressed together. The sleepy omega frowned and pulled away when he felt something warm and wet against his face. “Kei? What’s wrong?”
Tsukishima looked...lost. Helpless, like he didn’t know what to do. For the first time, Yamaguchi realised that he was crying. “I can’t get her to calm down. She doesn’t… She doesn’t know who I am, she started crying because she got scared of me, I can’t-” Mizuki started bawling even harder at the frantic pheromones that her father was oozing, despite Yamaguchi’s attempts to quiet her down. “I don’t know what I’m doing, Tadashi. I barely know how to hold her, she isn’t comfortable around me, she- I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, please, I’m sorry- I would never hurt you, I’m sorry-”
Yamaguchi couldn’t tell if his alpha was speaking to him or their daughter. “Kei- Kei, like this.” He carefully adjusted Mizuki in Tsukki’s arms, letting him support her body and her head properly. “Calming pheromones will help, let her smell you. Part of her scent is yours, you know.” Tsukki took a deep, shaky breath, trying to calm himself. He let out calming pheromones per his mate’s advice, clutching Mizuki against his chest, his instincts guiding him to calm and soothe the tiny being in his arms. He puffed out a shaky sigh of relief as their daughter finally quietened down, babbling up at her parents cutely. Yamaguchi leaned his head on his alpha’s shoulder, both of them looking down at their daughter. Tsukishima Mizuki. Their perfect little creation.
Tsukki remembered what it was like when Yamaguchi had gotten pregnant. He had swept his mate up in his arms and kissed him silly, tears of happiness rolling down his cheeks, laughing and crying at the same time. For the rest of the night, he had thanked his Tadashi in every way he knew how, for giving them a daughter (Tsukki knew it was a girl, he could smell it), for accepting his courting, for loving him despite his many flaws, until the omega was drifting off to sleep, sweaty and spent and exhausted from his alpha’s gentle love. Tsukki had taken a break from playing for the Sendai Frogs when the instinct to be with his mate 24/7 overrode everything else in his life. He had spent nine months at home with his pregnant omega, all his time and effort going into making sure that his Tadashi was comfortable, happy, and content. He remembered the way he froze when he smelt the beginnings of labour in the bedroom they shared, Yamaguchi’s cry of pain sounding through the house mere moments later. He had rushed his mate to the hospital, snarling and baring his fangs at everyone who tried to separate them, but he had held himself back, if only just barely, for Yamaguchi’s sake. When that wail had rung out through the delivery room, Tsukki had started sobbing. The labour hadn’t been easy, and it had been torture to watch his mate scream and writhe in pain on the hospital bed when all he could do was watch and offer a few words of comfort. Still, he had refused to leave the room, sitting beside his omega, bearing the discomfort of his hand going numb from Yamaguchi’s tight grip, whispering gentle praise and motivation into his ear. And finally, their daughter had been born. Tsukishima Mizuki. Mizuki meant ‘beautiful moon’, and Tsukki felt that they couldn’t have picked a better name. Their daughter’s skin seemed to glow in the faint light filtering in from the bedside window, fine, long blonde lashes framing big eyes of limpid gold. Her hair was blond, too, like Tsukki’s, maybe just a tad more silvery, but it had the same errant wave to it as Yamaguchi’s did. Anyone could look at her and immediately know that she was their daughter.
Everything had changed after little Mizuki was born. Tsukki had become obsessed with earning more money, but it came from a good place. He was determined to fulfil the vision he had, one where he had enough money to spoil his mate and daughter rotten, where he had the money to cater to their each and every whim. They were by no means poor, but they weren’t wealthy either, and Tsukki had taken it upon himself to make them so. He had taken on another job as an accountant in addition to playing volleyball, and he was balancing his time between the two professions. He thought that everything was going according to plan, until he realised that he had been too ambitious, to the point where he was neglecting his family, the sole reason he was trying to make more money in the first place. Tsukki turned his head to look at his beautiful omega, clad in his oversized cable-knit sweater with his long legs bare under the covers, hair mussed and sticking up everywhere, a blissful smile on his lips as he looked down at Mizuki. He cleared his throat. “Tadashi, I- I’m sorry. I wanted… I wanted to show you that I could provide for you and Mizuki, that I could give the both of you a secure future. One where you would want for nothing. I didn’t realise what I was, or rather wasn’t doing, and now… Now my daughter doesn’t even recognize her own father. I’m sorry, Tadashi. I’ve failed you, and her.” He pulled Mizuki even closer to his chest, leaning down to press a gentle kiss to her tiny forehead, smiling a little through his tears when she giggled and made grabby hands at his glasses. He looked away in shame. “I’ll do better. I’ll be a mate you can be proud to call yours, the best father I can be. I- I understand if you regret bonding with me, but please, just give me another chance to prove myself to you. I’ll be better, I can, I know I can-”
“Kei. Please stop.” Tsukki was terrified of what his mate was about to say, but he knew that he didn’t have the right to speak, not anymore. Not after what he did. He was still stiff as a board when Yamaguchi squeezed slim arms around his torso, only relaxing slightly when the omega started purring against his neck.
“Why do you still love me? How can you still love me, after what I did? It was unforgivable. How-”
“Because everybody makes mistakes, Kei. Yours might have been a little bigger than most, but that’s okay. All you wanted was to prove that you could provide for us, but I already know that you can and you will. I’ve been with you since day one. I know every single one of your flaws, but I still love you anyway. There are definitely gonna be many other disagreements like this, and I’m sure that we’ll both say things that we’ll regret, but I will never, ever regret bonding with you. We’ll work through this together, right?” Yamaguchi rubbed his nose against Tsukki’s cheek, holding his daughter’s tiny hand with one of his own.
I love you. I love you. Always. Forever. I love you. Tsukki was still too choked up to speak, but he hoped that his feelings were clear enough through the slow, sweet kiss that he pressed to his omega’s forehead. He carefully passed their daughter to his mate and pushed Yamaguchi’s shoulder gently, prompting him to lie down on his side. Tsukki curled his body protectively around his Tadashi, his chest to the omega’s back, reaching over him to place a warm palm on Mizuki’s back and cuddling his two darlings close. “I’m so sorry I scared you. I’m never letting you both feel that way again.”
Yamaguchi sighed. He doesn’t get it, does he? Really, I love him and all, but how can someone be so academically gifted and yet so dumb at the same time? “I don’t want empty promises, Kei. Prove it to me, and I’ll decide whether or not to go through with your punishment of no sex for a month.”
Tsukki’s eyes widened. “N-No sex for a month?” he whimpered. He usually wasn’t a whimpering person, but this was way below the belt. At least, that’s what he felt until he realised that this was way less harsh of a punishment than he actually deserved.
Yamaguchi smirked to himself. “Mhm. Depends on how good breakfast is tomorrow morning,” he joked (mostly), keeping his tone light and teasing.
Tsukki relaxed marginally when he realised that his mate was joking. Maybe. “Looks like we’ll be having french fries and pancakes, then. I love you, Tadashi. And you, Mizuki. Even though you probably have no idea what I’m saying.” He pulled his little family close, humming happily, the alpha equivalent of a purr. Tsukki smiled as his omega replied with a ‘love you too, Kei’ distorted by a yawn. Mizuki just babbled softly. It was good enough for him.