Chapter Text
The party was dying down, most of the guests were either preparing to leave, had already left, or were too wasted to think about leaving. Some of them couldn’t remember what the reunion was for in the first place.
Fleur wasn’t ready to go home just yet, the thought of going back to that cold, empty apartment was worse than the semblance of company she had right now. And she wasn’t as drunk as she’d like to be either. She concentrated on the cold feeling of the beer she held in her hands to keep herself grounded while she tried to remember why she came here in the first place.
‘I have no business being here’ she thought, ‘after what happened with Bill, most of the Weasleys stay as far away from me as possible’ the only exception to that being Ginny, weirdly enough, she had become more friendly towards the veela ever since the young marriage had decided to part ways. And Ron, too, in a way, but he was only around when Hermione was around, and a part of Fleur just knew that otherwise he wouldn’t even look in her direction.
Sadly, Ginny had just gone home, or more like she had been carried home by her attentive boyfriend after slurring her goodbyes to everyone.
‘There go the last two people who are nice to me’ but that wasn’t the truth, and Fleur knew that, her inner voice was just dramatic as hell. In fact, one of the hosts was a good friend of hers, the reason why she came here in the first place.
‘The reason why I’ve managed not to kill anyone here yet’ she thought as she stood up, purposely avoiding eye contact with the twins, who were talking in hushed whispers, sitting at the other side of the room, making bets amongst themselves about her. ‘But what do they know about me? Nothing, not even that a veela’s hearing is as good as a werewolf´s’.
Fleur was trying to make her way across the room to get to the balcony, the stares were getting on her nerves. She could feel each pair of eyes judging her, all except one. She turned to look at her, sitting on a chair next to Ron, who was animatedly talking to some of his friends about quidditch. ‘She hates quidditch’ Fleur thought, ‘doesn’t he know that? she’s probably bored right now’.
Hermione was looking back at her with concern, as she did whenever Fleur agreed to come to one of their big meetings. And no matter how much Fleur wanted to approach her, she stayed put. The veela managed to send a smile her way before walking outside, hoping to convince both of them that she was alright.
‘Why am I here again?’ she though, as she welcomed the night air, ‘because Hermione asked me to’.
The only person who had bothered to check on Fleur after the divorce was announced, the one who helped her move out of the Burrow and into her new apartment. The one who always managed to make her smile, who went with her to bar after bar but didn’t drink, knowing Fleur would drink enough for the two of them.
‘She never asks why I drink so much; she just talks to me about her job and her cat and…’
Ron had just said a very funny joke, or so he thought, as his laugh was loud enough to reach Fleur’s ears. She took a sip from her beer, she had managed to only drink two that day, mindful of the fact that she had to make it back to her place by herself, with no Hermione to help her.
‘I wonder if she’s noticed, that I drink more when she mentions him’
She started lighting up a cigarette, with a lighter Hermione had given to her as a gift. She always brought it with her to this sort of things, since she usually left her wand at home to avoid cursing anyone on ‘accident’.
“It’s kind of cold out here, don’t you think?” Hermione asked, standing at her side. She was rubbing her palms together; she had a jacket on now. ‘She probably went to get it before following me outside’.
“I don’t really feel it” Fleur lied.
“Come on, don’t be like that” Hermione begged.
“Like what?” the veela asked.
“You know, like you act with everyone else, don’t be like that with me”
‘I could never, not with you’ But Fleur wasn’t ready to say that out loud.
“It is rather cold tonight” she admitted, not looking Hermione in the eye.
“Do you want to borrow something warm? I can’t guarantee that it’ll match your clothes but at least you won’t be cold” Hermione offered.
“It’s okay” Fleur said, taking a puff out of her cigarette, “besides, we both know I would never give it back”
“You’re right” Hermione said, “you still have my favorite sweatshirt, you know”.
“It’s my favorite sweatshirt now, sorry, us veelas are very possessive creatures”
Hermione got closer to Fleur, and the veela unconsciously gave her the cigarette so she could take a drag. A gesture that had become sort of routine for them, when they were alone like this. Of course, Ron didn’t know Hermione smoked, and it wasn’t like the witch admitted it herself, it only happened when Fleur was around.
“If it’s your favorite, how come I never see you wear it?”
“We don’t see each other all the time, dear” Fleur said. ‘I only wear it at home, but you don’t need to know that’ she kept it next to her bed, to wear when she was feeling lonely,
They fell into an easy silence after that. Nothing but the sound of the wind and the muffled laughter from inside. Fleur drank what was left of her beer then.
“Hermione, what is it like to love?” She asked.
“What do you mean?”
“You are with Ronald, are you not? What is it like?” Fleur sighed while looking away for a second, feeling the cold night air on her face. “what´s it like to look at someone you love, knowing that they love you back?”
Hermione was quiet for a moment. “Well, it’s kind of hard to explain, I guess”.
“Can you try?” The veela asked.
“Well,” Hermione started, “with Ron it’s, I guess I always knew, you know? He’s been with me through so much”
‘And so has harry, so why him?’
“And Harry too, but it’s different. He’s like a brother to me. With Ron, I guess a part of me always knew we’d end un together, maybe?”
Fleur entertained herself with smoking so she wouldn’t make any comment about that. It was Hermione’s life, after all.
“Love is… always coming back to each other, and choosing to try and make it work every day, even if it’s hard”
‘Like Bill did, he tried his best’ Fleur thought, remembering the last good days of her short marriage. ‘But I couldn’t do that to him, not when I knew I didn’t feel the same anymore’.
“…and it’s like he’s always there for me, you know? No matter what, at the end of the day all I want to see is him smiling at me”
‘I can relate to that’ Fleur thought while looking at Hermione talk, she wasn’t really paying attention, she had heard most of it several times already anyway. And each time it hurt the same.
“And, I guess, when I look at him, I can see in his eyes that he feels the same way about me, the way his eyes light up when he sees me, you can’t fake that” Hermione had a wistful look on her face, Fleur’s heart broke even more at the sight of that.
‘And do you see the way my eyes light up when I see you? Do you see how they dim when I see him with you?’
“So yeah, I guess that’s what love feels like” Hermione ended, abruptly. That’s what it’s like for me, at least” Hermione kept quiet then, waiting for the veela to say something.
“I see” Fleur said, “I guess I can’t relate then”.
“Hey, it’s okay” Hermione gave Fleur a pat in the back, “I’m sure you’ll figure it out”.
“I don’t know, Hermione” Fleur took a last drag of her cigarette and put it off after that, “what if I’m not meant to be loved?”
“Anyone would be a fool not to love you” Hermione answered immediately.
‘But you are no fool, my love, far from it. And yet here we are’.
“it’s getting late, I should go now” Fleur said, instead. She noticed how close the two of them were, and how quiet it was, even the laughter from inside had died down. She was probably one of the last people there.
“You can always stay the night, you know” Hermione said, maybe a little desperate
“I know, but we both know I won’t stay here” Fleur said, calmly.
“What do you mean?” Hermione asked.
“You must understand, it would be too painful for me to stay” She explained.
“But, why?”
“Please” Fleur begged, “don’t make me say it, I know you are smart enough to have it figured out already”
“… what if I want to hear you say it?” Hermione said quietly.
Fleur had a moment of realization then.
“Oh, my dear Hermione, do you still doubt that beautiful mind of yours?” even if she had already walked away from her, the veela stepped closer to hold Hermione’s face between her palms, to look her in the eyes so she could confirm her assumptions.
“Tell me, why did I ask only you to help me find a new place to live? Why do I only come to these silly parties when you ask, and not someone else?”
Hermione was staring intently at her, but she wasn’t saying anything.
“Why are we always talking around in circles when it comes to my divorce, or anything related to my love life?” Fleur pushed on. “How can it be that I always put a cold front with everyone else, but I drop the act after a single word from you? You’ve seen how I act in front of my enemies, in front of my friends and when I’m alone with you it’s different, why would that be, Hermione?” A pause.
“Tell, me, what conclusion have you reached?”
“That” Hermione started, hesitantly, “that you love me” it was a whisper too low for anyone else to hear, a confession meant for the two of them to share, and the night to witness.
Fleur let go of her then. “You shouldn’t doubt yourself” she said, “you’re the smartest person I know” she stepped away, half expecting Hermione to come closer, but not surprised when she stayed where she was. “And you’re always right”.
She made her way inside. Only to bump into Ronald on the way, he also offered her to stay the night. But she couldn’t.
‘I live close enough anyway’ Fleur thought, willing herself not to cry. Remembering how it was one of the reasons she chose to move to that apartment in the first place. She couldn’t bear to live far away from her Hermione. No, not hers. She had to remember.
As soon as she made it home, she opened a bottle of the first thing she found, trying to drink enough to forget that conversation, her feelings even. Thinking about it, she was surprised it had taken them this long to talk about it. But of course, it had to be at Hermione’s engagement party.
Maybe this was it. Maybe the Fates were having a little fun with Fleur’s life, and there was nothing she could do but surrender to her tragic destiny. She fell asleep with these thoughts on her mind. Not really thinking about what tomorrow would bring.