Chapter Text
One day can change your life.
One decision can change your whole life trajectory.
For Dazai he had three such days
The first was when Odasaku died, and he left the dark for a world of light.
The second was three weeks later, when his heat addled mind, invited Chuuya into his bed.
The third, well, that hasn’t happened yet.
Dazai groaned in pain as he was sick again. He should never have slept with that damn Alpha. A 99% effective rate and this time it had to be the 1% it failed. Once last drink he’d promised himself before he was holed up in his house for the next two years. Once last night on the town, letting himself be the teenager he was. Well he guessed it truly would be the last time he got to do anything that fun.
They’d done it before, Chuuya fucking him through his heat, the pill he was on working so well, they thought nothing of it when Dazai’s heat surprised them. A going away present Chuuya had called it, one last long night of sex before they never saw each other again. At the time Dazai was just grateful they had gone to his house, as he’d used one of the smaller upstairs rooms as one big nest, and he could drag Chuuya there instead of into his bedroom. They were never meant to be, in a different life perhaps, but here they were too similar, too angry to ever work as a couple, more at home using the other for their own pleasure.
The doctor had told Dazai that abortion wasn’t an option for omega’s, that if they survived the procedure the toll it took on their mental health would kill them instead. Years of being used solely for breeding had left its mark on modern day omega’s, and modern medicine had yet to find a way around it. Adoption was an option of course, but the child or children Dazai was carrying were likely to inherit one or both of their abilities and were unsuitable to be put up for adoption.
Dazai took a deep breath, the nausea abating long enough for him to check his phone. A reply from Chuuya
Fine. Meet you at our Café, 1pm. If you’re late I’m not coming again.
Dazai had an hour to get to the café, less if he wanted to be on time. He managed to get dressed, pulling on a hoody to hide his already changing figure, he was only six weeks pregnant, but his body really wanted him to know that. He also grabbed the pregnancy test that had started this, and the paperwork off the doctor, just in case Chuuya didn’t believe him.
Dazai got to the café first, picking a table that was hidden towards the back, they wouldn’t be disturb here. He ordered a tea for Chuuya and for himself a hot chocolate with all the trimmings, he didn’t care that he would throw it all up later, he wanted something nice. He was eating the cream off a chocolate flake as Chuuya arrived. He sat opposite Dazai, taking in his red eyes and general tiredness.
“You look like shit,” he greeted him “thanks for the tea.”
Dazai stayed silent, as Chuuya finished off making the tea.
“So, what was so damn important that you dragged me out here? I could get in trouble if someone saw me with a traitor.”
“I’m pregnant. It’s yours.”
“But I took my pill, Mori checks that damn thing is working every month.”
“Yeah well accidents happen,” Dazai sighed, “look I know being a father to a traitor’s baby probably isn’t what you wanted out of life, but…” Dazai trailed off
“You can’t get rid of it?” Chuuya finished for him.
Dazai looked surprised
“Yeah I remember Mori’s lesson and the bajillion reminders he gave us after he walked in on us during your heat that one time. Is adoption an option?”
Dazai shook his head, “No, ability inheritance isn’t well studied, and if the…the…it, inherits either or both of our abilities it could cause problems so the doctor won’t sign off on that option.”
“You’ve been to a doctor, already?”
“Well I know over the counter tests can be wrong, and I didn’t want to bother you if it was just a false positive. I really hoped it would be.”
“So, we’re having a baby then?”
Dazai nodded, Chuuya took a sip of his tea,
“Osamu, I’m not ready to be a father, hell we can’t even last twenty four hours in the same room without trying to kill each other, could you imagine raising a child in that dynamic?”
“I thought you’d feel like that, I’ll be honest if the roles were switched right now, I’d be terrified. Which is why I have a suggestion for you.”
“I’ll raise the child myself.”
“You?” Chuuya laughed
“Well what the fuck do you suggest Chuuya? Do you want to raise it? You just said you’re not ready to be a father, we can’t get rid of it in well, any way, so give me your suggestions.” Dazai looked on the verge of tears, trying to keep his voice low.
“Shit, look I’m sorry I laughed, this is all just strange, and well, you’ve been suicidal the whole time I’ve known you. How are you going to cope with those thoughts and being the sole carer for a child?”
“The doctor was really confident my omega instincts would kick in. It may take the entire pregnancy, but when it’s born, those thoughts will just fade away.”
They finished their drinks in silence. Dazai was staring off into the distance, lost in thought, Chuuya’s hand on his made him jump.
“Do you truly want to raise this child alone?” he asked, voice low.
“I’ve gone through all the scenario’s, option one – you stay, we scream and fight everyday and our child has a terrible childhood, there’s also the Mafia problem. Mori’s bound to want to get his hand on our child. Option two – we share custody, which starts off great, but then you get stuck on a mission and miss your slot and I’m stuck home with an upset child, thinking their father doesn’t care.”
“I don’t like either of those options,”
“Thought so, which leaves option three – you spend the pregnancy with me, a meal each day, appointments, baby item shopping, the week or so before the birth. You’ll stay with me for the birth, I know you don’t want to be a father, but I’m guessing you don’t want the guilt of missing your first child’s birth.”
“When you put it like that, no I don’t, then what?”
“You don’t come home with us. Your obligations to this child will then be over.” Dazai paused, rubbing at the small bump over his hoody, as he was starting to feel sick again, “I would like them to know about you though.”
“Why?”
“We’re eighteen now, what if in a few years you’re ready to build a relationship with our child. But it won’t work because you’re a stranger to them. Or what if they look like you and see you out and about, then they get their heart broken because their father was always nearby. So, I’ll tell them you weren’t ready and that it was okay, that you don’t love them any less, but it was what worked for us. I don’t expect you to ever take up a father role with them, maybe an uncle, they’ll know the truth, but I thought an uncle they see occasionally would work. Of course, that may never happen, but it’s an option.”
Chuuya’s phone went off,
“Damnit, I need to go. I… I need to think about the options you’ve given me. When is your next appointment, it’s the scan isn’t it?”
“Yeah, it’s in two weeks, I’ll text you the details.”
“Thanks, Dazai and I’m sorry this happened.”
Chuuya felt like he should kiss Dazai goodbye but it would make it too awkward so he left, leaving a few notes on the table to cover the drinks.
*****
Two weeks later and Chuuya surprised Dazai by picking him up for his appointment. He only knew where Dazai lived as that was where they had ended up that fateful night. As Dazai left the house his bump was noticeable, the top he’d picked clinging to it.
“Oh wow, you really are pregnant,” Chuuya greeted him,
“A simple hello would have sufficed,” Dazai grumbled, “the tops I’ve bought must be running small as they’ve all clung like this, it’s uncomfortable.”
“You wear bandages 24/7 and a top is uncomfortable.”
“Chuuya stop arguing with the pregnant one who has spent the past fortnight being best friends with the toilet and just drive.”
They drove in silence, Chuuya thankful the hospital was only a short drive away.
“This is an ability safe hospital, and as they work with a lot of government employees it’s neutral ground. Mori never uses this place so you’re safe” Dazai explained as Chuuya parked the car. They got out and made their way to the maternity outpatients. Chuuya hovering at Dazai’s side, his alpha side screaming to comfort the omega carrying his child, but the rational side of him knowing Dazai was likely to hit him. the doctor was waiting for them and they went straight in to the examination room.
“Good Morning, Nakahara-san is it?” the doctor greeted them, as Dazai sat on the bed.
“Chuuya,”
“Chuuya, lovely to meet you. Dazai’s explained the situation to me and I’ve prepared some leaflets for you, to help with managing your alpha instincts during this pregnancy. I want you both to know you will get through this, and your situation isn’t as unusual as you think. You two haven’t bonded?”
Dazai shook his head
“Nope, thankfully,” Chuuya smiled, sitting on a chair next to the bed.
“Right, Dazai I’m going to need you to take your top off, then we can start the scan.”
“How have you been feeling?” the doctor asked as Dazai got comfortable on the bed.
“Bad, I feel like I’m coming down off drugs constantly, and I haven’t touched any since the night we… it… my last heat. I’m tired, and then there’s the morning sickness.”
“Your omega side needs you clean, usually it’s not noticeable, but I saw in your notes that you’ve had a few overdoses and near misses with both drink and drugs?”
Dazai nodded. The doctor started the scan as he talked, the screen turned away from Dazai and Chuuya.
“Then how you’re feeling is to be expected, your body is getting used to being pregnant and not relying on drink or drug to escape. It’s going to be tough but another month and you’ll be feeling much better. The good news is that unless you actively seek them out, the work your omega side is putting in now is a lasting change. A clean slate to start your new life as a parent with.”
“You haven’t been drinking since you found out, have you Dazai?” Chuuya asked concerned.
“Chuuya I’ve barely kept water down. Do you think I’m wasting my good whiskey on that?! I haven’t drunk anything alcoholic since it convinced me spending a night with you was a good idea.”
“Dazai take a deep breath please.” The doctor instructed, “your anger is affecting the babies.”
Dazai almost started crying at that, he may not want the babies but he wanted them to be healthy.
“Wait, did you say babies as in more than one?” Chuuya asked,
“Yes,” the doctor moved the screen, “you’re having twins, they’re a little on the small side, but given your age and the way you’ve been feeling it’s fine at this stage. They’ll probably make up for it later in the pregnancy. Basing on the date of your heat, they’ll arrive around the end of July, beginning of August.”
“Fuck, fuck, fuck, twins?! I have to grow two humans inside of me and then push them out?! Chuuya what have you done to me?!” Dazai wailed,
“Shh, shh it’s okay Dazai,” Chuuya took his hand squeezing it in reassurance, “you’re the strongest person I know, you can do this. I’ll be as here for you as you want me to be.”
“Chuuya is correct, your body wouldn’t have let you have twins if it didn’t think you could manage it. It may not seem like it, but your omega side does have your best interests in mind.”
“I know, it’s just a bit much to take in,”
“It’ll be okay, I’ll print off two copies of the scan for you. Having something to look at will help your mind process it Dazai.”
“Great thank you”
“I’d like to see you in a month to check how you are doing, Chuuya you won’t need to come unless Dazai wants you to, the next scan will be a month after that and I’d like to see you both for that one.”
“Thank you,” Chuuya helped Dazai off the bed and they left.
Chuuya took Dazai home, the ride silent. As Dazai moved to leave the car Chuuya stopped him,
“I don’t have work until this evening, could I come inside? I have some things I’d like us to discuss.”
“Sure” Dazai nodded, “but you can make your own food and drink cos I’m knackered.”
In the end Chuuya ended up making a sandwich and tea for both of them, Dazai settling on the settee, a blanket wrapped around him.
“I’ve been thinking about the options you suggested. I’d like to take option three, I’ll be here as much as you want for the next four months, take you shopping for the items you’ll need and I won’t stop you from telling them about me. I thought we could take some pictures together when you’re feeling better so you’ve got something to show them,” he paused, “I’ll also pay child support.”
“Child support? But I have money Chuuya”
“I know, but babies cost a lot of money and you’ve got two of them to raise, to clothe, to feed, to send to fun activities, take on fun little holidays. Neither of us had the best childhood, and I want our babies to have the best childhood we can give them. This will help towards it, I don’t care how or what you spend it on, as long our children are happy.”
“But…”
“This is non-negotiable Osamu.” Chuuya sighed, “I’m not ready to be the father our children need’s, and you aren’t ready either yet your willing to have a go, to stay and raise our children. So, this is the least I can do. I’ll have a contract drawn up, so we’re both on the same page.”
“Okay, I'll use what I need but the rest can go in account for university or their first home,” Dazai rubbed at his bump, “I’d like you to think about next of kin as well, just in case something happens to either of us, I don’t want them to get lost in the world.”
“Sure.”
*****
The next four months for Dazai were hell. His body didn’t take well to pregnancy and by his third month he was on bed rest, only going out for check-ups and one trip to buy the furniture for the babies’ room. Chuuya visited each day, making lunch for him and Dazai as well as setting up dinner to make sure Dazai actually ate. After several warnings from Dazai’s doctor, they tried to calm their moods around each other, trying to act decently towards each rather than biting each other’s head off.
They had ended up naming Kouyou as their next of kin, Chuuya telling her their secret, as he needed someone to lie for him if he was needed by Mori when Dazai was in labour. Dazai also let Chief Taneda know his change in circumstances and he was very understanding, telling him he could work with the agency president to find a working pattern that worked for his family.
It was now a week before Dazai’s due date and Chuuya had been staying at his house for the past week. He’d tried to be mindful of Dazai’s ever changing moods, but living together was difficult. They were constantly snapping at each other, as Dazai was struggling to sleep in the July heat and Chuuya was roped into staying awake with him. It further cemented in both of their minds that raising their twins together would never work.
Dazai was sprawled over the settee, hand on his bump, two electric fans pointed at him, Chuuya was sat in the other chair.
“Chuuyaaaa I’m too hot and I hurt”
“Yeah, well, what do you want me to do about it? I can’t control the sun Dazai.”
“Oh, give me a break, my bump is huge, I’ve had aches and pains for months. My body is getting ready to birth your children, in the hottest July Yokohama has had in recent memory. I’m scared about what is coming next, can’t you just play the loving alpha for just one afternoon?”
Chuuya sighed, stomping over to sit next to Dazai on the settee, pulling Dazai’s head into his lap,
“Fine, I guess the heat just makes me cranky,”
“Rub my bump please,”
Chuuya moved his hands onto Dazai’s bump,
“Like this?”
Dazai sighed, content, “Perfect,”
“Your scent is strange today”
“Good strange or bad staaangowwww” Dazai whimpered, “I… I think that was a contraction”
“You’re not due yet though, and I thought omega babies were always on time?” Chuuya asked confused
“Well ours are making an early appearance Chuuya,”
“That explains the changes in your scent then, do we need to go to the hospital yet?”
“No, it’s just been that one and my water hasn’t broken yet.”
“Okay then, do you want to sit up in my lap a bit more? I know we’re not bonded but contact from me has to help, right?”
Dazai nodded.
It took a few minutes but soon Dazai was inbetween Chuuya’s legs, his legs stretched out onto the footstool, Chuuya was rubbing Dazai’s bump. They were both far too hot, but Dazai didn’t care anymore, the panic overriding the rest of his senses,
“Chuuya something doesn’t feel right. Like the babies aren’t in the right position or something.”
“It’ll be fine Dazai,” Chuuya placed a kiss on Dazai’s scent glands, careful not to use any teeth.
Dazai groaned again, rubbing the bottom of his bump, he moved Chuuya’s hand so it was under his and following his movements
“Can’t you feel them kicking? The head should be there at this point not their legs”
“Oh, that’s a strong kick. It’s still early maybe they’ll move into the right position,”
Dazai shook his head, whimpering from the pains of the kicks
“Take me to the hospital Chuuya, this isn’t right and I’m scared, what if our babies are going to get hurt?”
“It’ll be okay Dazai, we’re going to go to the hospital and the babies are going to be just fine, okay?”
Dazai nodded, Chuuya helped him up, trying to keep his own scent calm to calm Dazai. Dazai got a few steps before he clutched his bump a groan turning into a scream as a contraction hit and his water broke.
“We need to hurry Chuuya, ow, ow owwwww, the babies are in the wrong spot, this isn’t right, this isn’t right,” Dazai practically wailed as Chuuya took him by the arm and led him to the car, they took Dazai’s, the car seats already installed, helping him in. Chuuya was thankful it was a quiet afternoon, as they got to the hospital quickly.
The doctor was concerned when he checked over Dazai, and quickly left to bring in another doctor and a nurse. Omega births were generally straight forward, so for the babies to be coming a week early and feet first, was unusual. During this time Dazai was clutching Chuuya’s hand and whimpering. They may not have been ready to be parents, but they still wanted their babies to be born happy and healthy.
The doctor returned, introducing his colleagues and trying to put Dazai at ease. The nurse quickly administered some painkillers to Dazai, but it didn’t work. Mori had been afraid Dazai would be captured and tortured for information, so he had worked on building Dazai’s tolerance to all sorts of drugs, to the point a normal person amount would barely affect him. It didn’t take long for Dazai’s contractions to get stronger and closer together.
Twenty-six hours later and Dazai finally gave birth, both babies had been born feet first and Dazai had screamed himself hoarse from the pain. Their daughter was born first, followed by their son.
Dazai fell in love the instant he held them in his arms. All fears about raising them alone disappeared and all he could think about was the happiness he would have with his babies. He gave the babies their first feed before falling asleep, worn out from the birth.
Dazai woke a few hours later, it was dark out and to his surprise Chuuya was still there.
“Chuuya? Why are you here?” Dazai asked, confused
“I couldn’t leave without knowing you were alright, I thought you weren’t going to make it.”
Chuuya came over to the bed and pulled Dazai close,
“I’m never doing that again” Dazai grumbled
“I don’t blame you, but you did well Osamu, our babies are healthy and beautiful.”
“Have you changed your mind, seeing them?” Dazai asked
“No, I know they’re mine, but I don’t sense that when I look at them, all I see is your children. Are you feeling better about being a single Dad?”
“Actually… yeah. When I held them in my arms that first time… I fell in love with them. As you’re here, do you want to help me name them?”
“You’ll let me?”
Dazai nodded, “As long as it doesn’t clash with my surname. I’ve been searching through name books from all over the world and nothing is right.”
“Okay then” Chuuya held a hand out to help Dazai off the bed. Dazai grumbled as he realised, he still ached,
“You okay?”
“Yeah, guess it’ll take a few days for the pain to go, I mean they really made me suffer…”
They made it to the cribs the babies were in.
“But oh, they are too beautiful, Chuuya they look so much like you.”
“Really? All I can see is you.”
“A boy and a girl, I don’t know why I was expecting two boys, it’s silly but I’m so pleased I get one of each” Dazai smiled, “I get to experience both worlds.”
“I’m glad you’re happy Dazai, I was thinking Tabitha for you- our daughter and Dante for our son.”
“Yes those names are perfect Chuuya,” Dazai had tears in his eyes, happy tears though.
“Do you want to give them a middle name?”
“I wasn’t going to, but I was thinking, I want to honour Odasaku. Dante Oda Dazai, and Tabitha Saku Dazai”
“Perfect Dazai” Chuuya placed a kiss on Dazai’s cheek, as the nurse came in.
They left the hospital the next morning, Chuuya driving Dazai and the babies home. He walked Dazai and the babies in their car seats to the door.
“You can’t come in Chibi” Dazai told him when they reached the front door, “this… this part of our journey needs to start as just the three of us.”
“That’s fine. Good luck Osamu, just remember you can do this,” Chuuya paused, unsure of what to do next, “if you need anything, text me.”
“Thank you Chuuya” Dazai smiled, watching Chuuya walk to his car, before letting himself into the house, ready to start his parenthood journey.
*****
It took some time to find their routine, but Dazai soon took to parenthood. Trying to keep two babies occupied was difficult on occasion but Dazai got through it. He managed to feed the babies, himself and keep on top of the housework. All in all, he was feeling quite proud of himself.
Tabitha and Dante were now a month old, and to Dazai’s surprise Chuuya had decided to visit. He brought two stuffed sheep toys for the babies, and a homemade crab dish for Dazai. Dazai was feeding the babies with formula in bottles, as Chuuya talked
“To what do I owe the pleasure of you visiting Chuuya?”
“Why are your eyes red? I thought you were coping okay?” Chuuya ignored Dazai’s question
“It’s nothing”
“You don’t cry, what’s the problem?”
Dazai sighed, “Fine, as you suddenly care so much, Tabitha and Dante finished breastfeeding yesterday, it can be anywhere from after the first month or the third, I thought I would get longer feeding them like that, but nope. My hormones are all over the place and I had to go and get the three-month heat suppressant injection this morning, as my heat can hit at any time, now they’re not breastfeeding and I can’t afford to have heats right now. It just made me sad, the first little bit of their independence, well, in a way. Now, why are you here Chuuya?”
“Mori needs some work done in Europe. I’ll probably be gone for several years, I can return for a weekend here or there, but I’m not putting much hope in that happening. I just wanted you to know.”
“You could have texted me this Chuuya.”
“I know, but I wanted to see them before I left, I know, I know” Chuuya cut off Dazai’s objections before he started, “I’ve liked the pictures and silly anecdotes you’ve been sending me, but I can’t take this phone with me, in case someone finds it,” Chuuya paused, pulling a piece of paper from his pocket. “Here’s my PO Box, Ane-san checks it, can you send me a letter every few months, some pictures if you want, just updating me on them, please? If…if I or they ever decide they want me in their life, I want to make sure I know all about them. If you forget that’s fine, I know you’ve got a lot on your ha-“
“It’s okay, I’ll send them,” Dazai smiled, “I’ve got no one to talk to anyway so it gives me someone to share all the funny little bits with.”
“Thanks Osamu,” Chuuya leant forward and kissed Dazai.
“Bleaurgh, what the hell Chuuya?” Dazai yelped, “We’ve been through this, we only work if alcohol is involved. I may have a mate out there, but it isn’t you.”
“I just wanted to try. I’m sorry it wasn’t a good idea.”
“No, it was not. We definitely aren’t meant to be together”
“Nope.”
The babies finished feeding,
“Do you want to hold them?” Dazai asked
Chuuya shook his head, “I’m sorry, I need to get back to work”
“Okay, thanks for the visit Chuuya, I hope you mission goes well.”
“Thanks,” Chuuya smiled, letting himself out.
Dazai took the babies up to their crib, placing the sheep toys in with them. He smiled when he looked at them their cribs, all wrapped up in their blankets.
Dazai was happy that he was raising them alone, seeing Chuuya for even that short visit had worn him out, but the fact that Chuuya, even if it was for a brief moment had thought about getting something for the babies made him happy in a strange way.