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“We leave more life behind to take our place. Like this moon flower. It’s where all its beauty lies, you know. In the mortality of the thing.”
Jamie had brought Dani here to explain herself, to show herself. Dani was so good and Jamie didn’t know if she could be good enough for her. But she could pour her attention and affection into this, she knew she could. Growing something was Jamie’s specialty. She hoped that would be enough for Dani to see. She can feel Dani standing next to her, even through the cold, she can feel the warmth of just having her near.
Hands grip tightly against her jacket as she finds herself looking directly at Dani, who had gotten up during her speech. Just a moment of quiet before she was pulled back into a kiss. It’s not a long kiss, just enough to let Jamie know she has been heard and seen. Dani pulls back and just looks at her-- her eyes saying what her words don’t. A sigh and then back to kissing. Proper snogging in fact. Dani put herself into the kisses and Jamie allowed herself to be pulled in, hands clutched against Dani’s coat.
Even the warmth between the two of them doesn’t stop the cold from seeping into her hands and feet. “We could go inside,” Jamie says as they pull away from each other ever so slightly. “Get nice and warm.” Dani’s eyes are still drawn down to her lips and god damn. “Nice and boring hanging out inside could be.”
It takes them time to get back into the manor. Even with their hands linked together, it still isn’t enough for either of them. They take breaks, pushing against each other and letting their mouths connect. At one point, Jamie has pressed Dani against a tree, just to feel her against her again. There’s quiet laughter and big smiles as they make their way back.
Logically, Dani knew that Owen and Hannah would still be in the kitchen, but it still was a surprise to see them, chatting like they had been lost in the moment.
“We’re just.. We’re just going..” Dani was flustered. It didn’t help that Owen and Hannah were staring back at them with only slightly hidden smiles. There isn’t any shock or anything that would have shamed them.
“We’re going upstairs,” Jamie added, her hand tugging along Dani behind her.
Nice and boring. It didn’t quite describe what was happening between the two of them. Neither desired it even. This was fresh and new and special. Not boring, not at all.
There was an awkward silence once the door to the room was shut and latched as the two of them kicked off their shoes. Jamie shrugged off her coat and let it fall to the floor with no care. Dani had begun to tug off her own jacket. Her breath hadn’t quite catched up to her since being by the moon flower, actually.
“Poppins,” Jamie says so softly and so kind. “It doesn’t have to go any further than this. Honest.”
And her perfect, beautiful face means it. Dani can see that ending to this night, just waiting for her to take it. But Dani’s tired. She’s been tired for so long and Jamie’s hands and Jamie’s mouth are so warm and inviting. Jamie isn’t pushing, she isn’t demanding, but god, Dani wants her. Dani wants the rest that comes with Jamie’s mouth pressed against her own.
“No, you should stay. Would you... stay?” She’s still flustered and nervous, but Jamie doesn’t seem to mind. In fact, her eyes haven’t left Dani since she started talking. Jamie’s hands on her hips drive Dani’s movements forward again. She’s tugging off her jacket and lets her hands move back to Jamie, steading her back to the moment. There’s words not needed between them. Things that just another queer person would know. The fear, the anxiety of not knowing, the anxiety of wanting .
The gardener lets her hands gently pull the au pair’s hips until they are touching her own. So far, it’s been Dani pulling Jamie into the kiss. This time, Jamie takes the lead and presses her lips against Dani’s. A content hmm happens and Dani can feel the vibrations linger down inside of herself. Their hands adjust, as bodies are pressed and pulled against one another. Dani’s hands end up caressing Jamie’s face, letting her fingers make their way through Jamie’s curled hair to reach the soft skin of her neck. Then Dani smiles. A proper, real smile that she can’t hold back. A laugh, a moment where they are still so close, and can feel the happiness between the two of them.
Security is the first thing that Dani feels as she pushes back into a kiss. Maybe a little too teethy, but the small hiccups don’t matter. In fact, the smiles make it even better. It’s so much better than anything Dani’s felt before. The pressure had evaporated. The kisses were easy and Dani was able to move her hands again, going back to the safety of Jamie’s hips. Her thumb rubbed against bare skin right where Jamie’s shirt ended and the feeling of it sent Dani moving further into Jamie.
“Easy, Poppins,” Jamie laughs as she pulls off one more kiss before smiling broadly. “Let me help.” Jamie separates them only a few inches, but it’s too far, Dani’s hands are attempting to pull her back in before she realizes what Jamie has gone to do. It’s just a simple shirt being pulled off, but at the same time it’s not. Dani can feel her breath shorten again as she takes in Jamie standing in front of her without a shirt on. Jamie doesn’t press, just lets her own hands move underneath Dani’s sweater. “Okay?” She asks as she grabs the fabric. Dani nods and lets her eyes shut while the sweater is pulled off around her head. “You’ve gotta move your hands, you know?” Jamie teases as she gets the sweater as far off as she can with Dani’s hands still lingering on her.
It’s a moment and they are both standing sans-shirts. A smile and then a kiss. A kiss and then hands exploring the new skin. It’s thrilling. Dani’s hands spread and linger against Jamie’s stomachs and hips and god. She’s soft and warm and Jamie allows her to explore. Jamie pushes them to the bed and Dani’s knees hit against the mattress. Their mouths don’t leave each other, even as Jamie’s hands move off her.
Jamie quickly unbuttons her jeans and pushes them down to the floor. And Dani’s pupils are blown as she stares. It’s enough to make Jamie blush. A real blush that moves past her cheeks and into her chest. “Yours?” Jamie asks as she makes her way back to Dani and lets her hands rest against Dani’s pants.
“I can,” Dani whispers as Jaime takes a step back to allow her room to adjust. She tugs her pants off and shuffles her feet in a way that Jamie can’t help but smile at.
Dani’s hands have stagnated at Jamie’s waist, almost as if she’s scared to move them. So Jamie moves slow. She lets her hands stay in safe zones on Dani’s body as she works her mouth back to Dani’s mouth. “Okay?” she whispers, not letting her eyes open as she mouths against Dani’s cheek.
“Okay,” Dani whispers back to her. “I’m just.. I just…” Dani’s sentences don’t make sense and her mind is a little mixed up as well. There’s so much skin and her brain is overridden with lust and heat that has encompassed her body. “On the bed.” She finally decides on saying.
It’s not smooth getting them both on the bed, but they’re both a little winded. This time when they reconnect, Jamie’s mouth makes its way to Dani’s jaw. She presses open kisses against her jaw as she allows her hands to run down Dani’s back. There’s nerves again, Jamie can feel the slight tension in the way Dani feels against her. She takes Dani’s elbow and brings Dani’s hands up, against her side, pressing kisses against Dani’s neck as she does. There’s a huff of laughter when Jamie’s tongue reaches out against her neck and tension releases from underneath her.
It’s Jamie on top of her and that makes Dani sink more comfortably into the mattress. She gets braver with her movements and allows herself to finally feel what she’s been dreaming about. Her fingers fiddle with the back of Jamie’s bra, feeling the clasps as she rubs her fingers back and forth. “Okay?” Dani is the one to ask this time. Her fingers waiting for the answer. Jamie whispers her approval and Dani, proudly, only takes 3 times to unclasp the bra. Jamie sits up and pulls the bra off. Dani leans forwards, her elbows supporting her weight as she stares. For all the stares, Jamie takes it all in stride and leans down to kiss Dani again, a soft, short kiss. An encouragement. She knows that Jamie will stop here if she asks. She knows that Jamie will whisper asking her consent, no matter how surely Dani knows she wants her. Dani pushes herself up and lets her hands clasp around Jamie’s head again. Pulling the woman closer to her as she smiles and clings to her. Jamie’s hands move around her back and fiddle with Dani’s strap. There’s intent behind her movements, but she doesn’t follow through, instead just letting Dani moan against her mouth as she moves her attention back to Dani’s covered breasts. Through the bra, Dani knows that Jamie can feel almost everything. It’s so different than before, she thinks. Instead of wanting to shrug away from touches or the feeling of someone putting his hands down her shirt, Dani is pushing into the feeling. God.
Dani can’t wait, she wants to feel Jamie’s hands against her chest. She reaches back and unclasp her own bra, letting it fall forward. And for all her own staring, Dani blushes when Jamie’s eyes gauk in their own right. They’re practically naked now and Dani shivers at the attention she is getting. “Come here,” Jamie asks and offers her hand to pull Dani closer to her again. This time, Jamie pulls Dani onto her lap, Dani easily sliding into straddling her. More kisses and smiles and the immense feeling of guilt and repression is lifted from Dani’s chest the more they move against one another. Jamie’s hands feel so warm and good against her skin. She pants into Jamie’s mouth when a hand presses against her breast and thumb grazes her nipple. Her hands grip against Jamie’s back, arching into her.
“More,” she whimpers and Jamie doesn’t waste time. Dani is positively sure that there is no better feeling than this right now. She’s so lost in her own thoughts and feelings that she startles a little when she feels a mouth pressing against her chest and then her chest and… oh my . Dani knows she needs to be more careful, that she isn’t gripping against Jamie’s jacket when she clings to her, but she can’t help herself and Jamie doesn’t seem to mind.
While Jamie mouths against her breasts, a hand moves down and Dani feels a fluttering of touches moving down her stomach. Fingers gently press against her panty line and Dani chokes a bit. “A’ight, Dani?” Jamie asks, pulling herself away from Dani only slightly. Her touches are so soft and Dani wants to scream for more, but she can only nod and press herself against the hand waiting patiently. They move, Jamie grabs Dani’s back and slides her off from atop of her. She lays Dani down and Dani believes that this is when she will die. Her heart is beating so loud she is sure that Jamie can hear it from where she leans atop of her.
Jamie’s hands are steady and sure as they drag down Dani’s underwear. In a different life, she would have worried about her bra and underwear matching. She always needed a long preparation to even think about letting Eddie touch her. But now, it doesn’t matter. Nothing about what she’s wearing… she had been wearing mattered. All that mattered was the way Jamie’s hands took them off of her. It’s the way that Jamie kisses against her ankle that drives her upwards again. She watches as Jamie kisses up her leg and whimpers. It’s too much and Dani pulls against Jamie’s arms again, wanting her close, wanting her to be pressed up against her again.
Her mouth is pressed against hers again and Dani clings to her. Her hands pressing Jamie’s back, squeezing her closer. She needs more. Jamie takes it in turn and smiles, letting her leg find a way to rest in between Dani’s.
Dani’s almost forgotten that she doesn’t have underwear on, when she feels Jamie’s leg pressed against her.
“ Oh. ” Her mouth slumps open. “OH.”
Jamie smiles again. “Oh,” she says back, her hand dipping down Dani’s stomach. Maybe it’s Dani’s imagination, but she feels Jamie’s fingers shaking slightly as they finally press against her.
Dani’s been touched before. She knows what it has felt like to have Eddie pressing against her, but her hands have swatted away anything before it went too far. She hadn’t wanted him to touch her like that. It had always felt wrong. But being touched by Jamie? No, she would never swat away her hands. Her legs spread, giving more room to Jamie’s leg and now Jamie’s fingers. “Okay Poppins?” Jamie asks as she kisses back on Dani’s jaw.
Dani nods, she can’t speak, can barely think as Jamie’s fingers slid against her centre and explores her. Dani doesn’t know where to put her own hands, she just knows she needs to be touching Jamie. Fingers continue to gently prod at her and Dani is just overloaded. Her body arches when a thumb is pressed directly onto her clit. “Oh,” she whimpers again. This time it's her face in Jamie’s neck. A finger enters her and Dani mewes against Jamie. “ Oh .” Then another and she moans out into the silence of her bedroom. She doesn’t know how much time passes, but she feels Jamie’s fingers moving and she’s determined to feel every second of it. There is a slow, steady push against her and it feels so good. Her mouth has been rendered useless and so instead of kissing, she presses her lips against Jamie’s neck.
She presses her forehead against her neck and just melts as Jamie thrusts-- no it’s not thrusts, it's delightful and fulfilling, much more than the thrusts she’s had before. Jamie’s fingers are enough and her thumb is pressed firmly against her clit and she finds her own hips moving with the movements inside of her. She wants more-- she’s never wanted more before. “ Please .” It’s the only word in the world that makes sense to her right now. “ Please .” It’s a beg against Jamie’s neck. Her hand is pressed against the other side of Jamie’s neck, just needing to feel there. Feel her face pressed up against her own.
Together .
Her other hand is pressed against Jamie’s back, clutching to air and she knows her nails are digging into Jamie’s back. The fingers inside her don’t move faster, but the thumb swipes down before pressing circles against her again. It takes no longer than ten more strokes and feeling the firm thumb rubbing circles before she is completely unraveled. She bites her neck to stop her from crying out, she knows she would be too loud, bringing too much attention to her room. (It takes her minutes to realize that Jamie had trembled against her when she bit down.)
Dani pants against her neck, heat surging up from her chest in the most delicious way. The fingers stay inside of her until her breathing has calmed down some and then they are finally slipped out and wiped on the bed sheet next to them.
As much as Dani had to have her breath calm down, Jamie still breathes heavily atop of her. Jamie relaxes against her body to catch her own breath. Dani’s hands are cool against her flushed skin.
“Wow.”
The expression brings a smile to Jamie’s face and she presses an open kiss against Dani’s lips.The kisses are soft again with tongues pressed together. “Wow,” she says again as she lets her forehead rest against Jamie’s, a smile stretching her cheeks. “That was… wow.”
“Did I break you, Poppins?” Jamie laughs back at her, but her eyes are still blown out and there’s movement between the two of them. Dani had been so focused on the way that Jamie’s hands were on her that she had forgotten that while Jamie’s leg pressed against her core, her leg was also pressed against Jamie’s.
“Not at all.”
She gets a hum as a response, as Jamie continues her soft grind against her leg. She’s damp against Dani’s leg and there's a new flush to her cheeks. Dani liked this. She liked being wanted like this. Before it had been all about whether the other person finished, she would just lay back and let it happen, hoping for any bit of the feeling that she had now experienced with Jamie. But this, she wants this too. She wants to be the one that helps Jamie fall apart. It wasn’t demanded of her, nor she thought Jamie would be upset if she didn’t.
“Can I…” Her question faded off as they made eye contact again, her hand resting against Jamie’s stomach.
“If you want.”
Of course that would be Jamie’s response. Sweet, kind Jamie who would never push. Dani nodded her agreement and let her fingers slide beneath the underwear for a moment before pushing down through soft curled hair and could feel Jamie’s own heat against her fingers. A moan escaped from Jamie’s lips and Dani smiled against her jaw.
Jamie pulled away and Dani instantly missed the feeling of her, but she wasn’t gone, just moved to tug off her own underwear. It gave a moment for Dani to sit up slightly before rolling towards Jamie, pushing up so she was atop of Jamie instead.
Instead of going right back down between Jamie’s thighs, Dani let her hands explore the other woman’s chest. She knew what felt nice to her and wanted to see if Jamie enjoyed the feelings as well. Jamie’s hips grinded against her leg as she pushed against her breast, teasing her nipple. “Good?” Dani asked and Jamie just smiled at her, before pulling their mouths back together.
When her hand made its way back down, she let herself feel the wetness as she teased her fingers against her core. It was a bit strange and Dani could feel only the ounce of anxiety as she tried to move as confidently as Jamie had. Her fingers pushed a little too hard and Jamie shifted away from her. “Easy, love.” Jamie said.
“I’m sorry,” Dani flushed and went to pull her hand away, but Jamie’s hand gripped around her wrist, keeping her hand there.
“It’s a’ight. Take your time,” she commands instead. “Unless you have somewhere else to be,” she teased.
“No, I just… slow?” she asks and she doesn’t think she could blush more than she already is. Her pale skin feels on fire as Jamie’s thumb strokes at the pulse of her wrist. Dani’s fingers stroke softly against Jamie and the tension has left her body as she allows herself to take a moment. She’s just learning and Jamie doesn’t fault her for it. There’s no room for shame in the stop. It’s simply a time for growth and understanding.
She’s gentler as her fingers coat themselves in the wetness of Jamie. “Jamie,” Dani whispers her name as she strokes and finds the nub that she had liked so much when Jamie had touched. This had Jamie shifting upwards, pushing into Dani’s hand.
Jamie’s hand has left her wrist, settling itself against Dani’s neck, sweat coats it even with her hair up. “That’s good,” she encourages, kissing Dani again. The encouragement makes Dani a bit bolder and she strokes until she finds Jamie’s entrance and pushes lightly against it. “One is fine,” she says kissing against Dani’s cheek to be able to get the words out.
It’s the same but so different for when she touches herself. This warmth and wetness and smell is completely Jamie, so she listens. Her finger dips into Jamie and the woman groans her approval. Her breath is shallow again and Dani can feel her shaking softly. Perhaps it isn’t her best kissing ever, but Jamie doesn’t seem to mind as she arches and rocks against Dani. Dani’s own core throbs with want as she pushes in and out of Jamie. Her thumb needs a bit of practice, the angle is different and she just wants to make Jamie feel as good as she had. “Jamie,” Dani whispers again as she begins to rub her thumb in motion with her finger’s movements.
Dani lifts her head to watch Jamie’s face as she pushes and rubs. Jamie’s eyes are closed and her mouth is just dipped open. There’s a line in her forehead and everything about it is beautiful. She can’t deny kissing her in that moment, keeping her fingers moving a bit quicker inside Jamie.
“Fuck,” Jamie whimpered, soft and grainy. The whimpers and pants drive her forward, pressing a bit harder and Jamie shakes against her. It’s not much longer before Jamie pushes harder against her and absolutely shakes into an orgasm.
Wow , is all Dani can think as she continues to softly push her fingers in and out of Jamie, drawing the orgasm out, like Jamie had done for her.
Dani doesn’t know what was better-- watching as Jamie fell apart or feeling it. Luckily, she doesn’t need to choose. A smile stretches her face again, she feels positively splendid .