Work Text:
“It’s his pretty hair, isn’t it?”
“Excuse me?”
“It could be his pouty lips or his puppy eyes…”
“Shut up, Bellamy.”
“…but I’m gonna go ahead and say it’s his pretty, soft, silky hair that has all of you wanting to have his babies.”
“How much time have you spent noticing Finn’s hair, exactly?”
“I think maybe he is like Samson, you know? All his beauty powers come straight from his manly mane and, if you cut it, he’ll lose his panty dropper skills.”
“You think you are so funny.”
“I am funny, you are laughing inside.”
“Yeah, I’m cracking up. If you are done being an ass, help me pack for the hunting trip.”
“You are all joy, aren’t you, princess?”
***
“About time, don’t you think?”
“Uggh, water?”
“Here.”
“Thank you. What happened?”
“You got shot.”
“Did I? Is everyone-”
“Everyone is fine, Bellamy.”
“Octavia?”
“She’s okay, she’s resting. I had to slip some calming herbs in her tea to drag her out of here. I’ll go wake her up.”
“Wait, wait…how long have I been out?”
“A week.”
“A week? Holy shit.”
“Yeah…”
…
“You left me alone.”
“What?”
“You left me alone. I didn’t know what…and they were…you don’t…”
“Hey.”
“You left me alone!”
“I’m sorry, princess.”
“Don’t you ever-”
“I won’t, I’m sorry.”
“Never again.”
“I won’t, I’m sorry, I swear.”
***
“I say we should act first, ask questions later.”
“Really? I didn’t see that one coming.”
“Oh, come on, princess! Stop overthinking it.”
“Maybe I am overthinking it but someone has to, Bellamy. If it would be up to you we would always jump head first and to hell with consequences.”
“And if it would we up to you nothing would ever get done!”
“I’m trying to do what is best for our people!”
“And I’m trying to get all of them killed so I can dance on their graves?”
“You are impossible!”
“Yeah, ‘cause you are a real piece of cake!”
“Okay. Just stop, okay? Stop it. Listen. I…let me try. Let me try talking to them once and if it doesn’t work, then we do it your way.”
“If it doesn’t work we use guns.”
“Jesus. Yeah, we use guns.”
…
“Admit it, princess, we make a good team.”
“Whatever.”
“Oh my God, freeze!”
“What?”
“I’m serious, don’t move.”
“What the hell, Bellamy?”
“I don’t know, I thought there was something on your face…”
“What is it?!”
“Now I don’t want you to be scared but I’m pretty sure it was a smile."
“You asshole!”
"Ouch, ow! Oh, no! It’s back!”
* * *
“What’s a delicate princess like you doing out in a freezing night like this? Does Prince Charming know you escaped the castle?”
“Piss off, Bellamy, I’m not in the mood.”
“Aww, you hurt my feelings, princess. I think by now you should be more… Hey, are you crying?”
“No.”
“Okay.”
…
“What are you doing out anyway? It’s really late.”
“Last controls of the day, you know. Making sure the-”
“-fires are out?”
“Yeah, and I want to be positive guards are awake and-”
“-the gate is locked?”
“And-”
“Bellamy, I already checked, okay? Relax.”
“I see you have everything under control.”
“Yeah, I wish.”
“It’s not your fault. He is not enough.”
“Excuse me?”
“The sooner you realize the better. He is just not enough for you.”
“Whatever you say. It’s none of your business anyway. You know nothing.”
“Maybe not, but you know you can do better than him.”
“What, like you?”
“Well, I can assure you, princess, if it would be me in that castle you would spend your nights bothered for a completely different reason.”
“You are so full of yourself.”
“Can you blame me?”
“I guess not. So? Isn’t there a fan willing to keep you entertained tonight? Or you just kick them out of your bed once you are done with them?”
“Careful there, princess, or someone might think you are jealous.”
“Yeah, I’m secretly hoping that someday I’ll get to be another notch in your bedpost, you know me well.”
“I’ll have to find someone else then.”
“Ha! Good luck with that. Seriously, is there any female in camp that you haven’t fucked yet? Other than your sister, that is.”
“There’s at least one.”
“Dream on.”
“Your loss.”
“I think I’ll live.”
“Tsk, what a shame because, Clarke? I would have let you stay the night.”
***
“So.”
“So?”
“You were right.”
“About what?”
“He is not enough.”
“Isn’t he, now?”
“Shut up. Jerk.”
***
“Could you move? You are blocking the sun.”
“What exactly are you doing?”
“What does it look like?”
“Like you are just there, on your back, doing nothing. I know I must be mistaken, though, since we have all this-”
“Yeah, I know, I know, things to do, places to be. 5 minutes, Clarke.”
“But-“
“Listen, guards are on their positions, food it’s already been taken care of and no one is seriously injured or dying. Just come lay down with me for 5 minutes and then we can go save the world, okay?”
“Fine.”
“Fine.”
…
“Stop fidgeting!”
“Well, it’s really uncomfortable on here! This big stone is digging in my skull and it’s giving me a headache.”
“Jesus! You really are such a princess, aren’t you? Come here. Better?”
“Actually, yes.”
***
“A penny for your thoughts.”
“What the hell do I want a penny for, princess?”
“You are right. A steak then.”
“Now you are talking. With or without fries?”
“Mmm…I’m feeling generous, what the hell. With fries.”
“Oh, yes, please. Chocolate cake?”
“Greedy. What do you know about chocolate anyway?”
“The same you know about fries?”
“Good point. Okay, then I’ll have a hot, steaming shower.”
“Let’s make it a hot, steaming bath.”
“Oh my God, you are a genius. Add a proper, comfy bed on top of that and you can kill me in the morning.”
“And now you tell me?”
***
…
“Bellamy…”
“Sorry.”
“No, it’s…”
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have-”
“It’s just too soon after Finn.”
“I understand.”
“It’s complicated, this could really mess things up.”
“Yeah, you are right.”
“I don’t think it’s a good idea, it’ll only cause trouble.”
“Probably.”
“Besides-”
“Clarke, who are you trying to convince, me or yourself?”
***
“Hey.”
…
“Hey!”
“What are you doing?! Let me go!”
“Jesus, princess, what’s wrong with you?”
“Nothing.”
“Really? Is this how you want to play this?”
“I’m not playing.”
“Neither am I, Clarke! You said it was complicated, you said it was a bad idea. Now you can’t get mad if I flirt with another gir…mphm.
…
“But you said-”
“I know what I said, okay!? Just! Arg! Do you really need to pick this moment to start listening to me?”
“I always listen to you, princess.”
“I know you do.”
“Good. And hey, don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone you are so jealous you can’t see straight but-”
“Shut up.”
“No, you see, it’s completely understandable. Just the thought of me with that sexy girl-”
“I mean it.”
“- her hands all over my hot body-”
“Just shut up, Bellamy!”
“Make me.”
***
“What are you doing?”
“Looking for my knife.”
“What do you need your knife for right now?”
“To carve that notch on the bedpost, of course.”
“…”
“Wait! Wait, wait, I’m joking! It was a joke! Oh, come on, princess!”
***
“Quit it.”
“Quit what?”
“Staring.”
“Why?”
“It’s making me uncomfortable.”
“Nervous?”
“No. Uncomfortable.”
“So you don’t get nervous if I come this close?”
“Bellamy.”
“Or if a put my hand on your hip?”
“Bellamy…”
“Clarke, do you get nervous if I whisper in your ear?”
“Bell…”
“Or if I kiss your neck?”
“…amy”
“Princess, if your tactic to make me go away is breathing my name like you are ready to open your legs for me, then let me tell you that it really, really isn’t working.”
***
“You can stop that stupid grin now.”
“I’m not grinning.”
“Yes, you are. I can almost see your damn smug smirk glowing in the dark, it is so bright.”
“Now, why would I be smirking, princess? It’s not like I made you come 3 times in a row, is it? Oh, wait…”
“You are never gonna let this one go, are you?”
“Nop.”
“God. You are horrible and I hate you.”
“No, you don’t.”
“No, I don’t.”
***
“Okay, so you were right, princess, the power of words and all that, whatever.”
“I’m so happy right now I’m not even going to tell you ‘I told you so’ but…oh, wait, I totally told you so.”
“Is it me or you are more and more annoying every day that goes by?”
“Aww, you’ve noticed, I’ve been training hard to meet up your expectations.”
“You are so thoughtful.”
“I totally am, right? You know what? I think we should throw a party.”
“You think we should throw a party?”
“Yes. I mean, after all we’ve been through… This peace attempt, as fragile as it may seem…I think we should celebrate.”
“Well, you know me, plenty of booze and tipsy, pliable girls, I’m all in.”
“Leave me alone, Blake.”
***
“Hey, gorgeous! I think we’ve met before. Claire, isn’t it?”
“I’m not talking to you.”
“Good, ‘cause what I have in mind doesn’t involve much talking…”
“Oh?”
“Yeah. Hey. I’m crazy about you. You know that, don’t you?”
“You better be.”
…
“Looks like they all are having a great time. Congratulations, princess, your royal ball is being an utter success. Looking at them having fun…you would say they don’t have a care in the world.”
“We care for them, don’t we?”
“Yeah, we do, we sure do. It’s just…on the big picture, we could have done way worse, you know?”
“Yeah…Yes, I know. I know.”
