Work Text:
The bed dipped behind him and the sheets rustled as Kageyama’s boyfriend, Hinata, settled in to go to sleep. Their backs were to each other. Kageyama pretended to sleep while his boyfriend made no move to touch him. It had been like this for a while. Hinata worked late nights at the bar and Kageyama worked early in the mornings at a cafe down the street. They had opposite schedules but they usually made it work.
I’m thinking of ending things.
Kageyama smiled and rolled over wrapping his arm around his boyfriend’s waist, pulling him flush against his chest. “Hey, how was work?” he murmured into Hinata’s hair sleepily.
“You’re supposed to be asleep!” Hinata giggled, rolling around in Kageyama’s hold so they were facing each other. “But, it was alright. The usual you know?” He smoothed the hair off of Kageyama’s forehead and tilted his head up so he could press a kiss to the skin there. “Seriously, go to bed. You’re gonna be tired in the morning, and you can’t be late another day this week.” Hinata tucked his head under Kageyama’s chin and closed his eyes, sighing contentedly.
The other boy groaned lowly before tightening his arm around Hinata. “You’re right. I hate it when you’re right,” he closed his eyes again and smiled slightly to himself. “G’night, love you.”
Hinata huffed a soft laugh, shaking his head. “Love you too, dork.”
Kageyama grimaced at the memory, squeezing his eyes shut tightly and willing himself to go to sleep. He wouldn’t have to think about anything then. The silence in their bedroom was almost deafening. There used to be hushed whispers and soft laughter. Now all that could be heard was the rustling of sheets as they tossed and turned, trying to sleep. This bed used to be so warm and comforting to sleep in, but now? Now it was just cold and uncomfortable.
The bed was cold when Hinata woke up the next morning. Kageyama had to work. He was fine with that, of course, it only meant that they didn’t have to tiptoe around each other in the mornings. He threw the covers off of himself and made his way into the kitchen, the only sign his boyfriend had been there was that the coffee pot was full. Hinata glanced down at his phone, maybe a good morning text? No. Nothing.
I’m thinking of ending things.
“Hey, Shoyo, I’m leaving.” A soft voice spoke from above him. Hinata pried his eyes open, they were sticky with sleep. He still wasn’t sure he was quite awake.
The first thing that greeted him was his boyfriend standing above him with a smile. Hinata stretched his arms above his head then wrapped them around Kageyama’s neck, pulling him down to his chest. “Mkay, bye, I love you. Have a good day.”
Kageyama pulled himself out of his boyfriend’s arms so he could look down at him and kiss his cheek. “Bye, I love you too.”
After Kageyama had gone, Hinata laid in bed for a good five minutes, basking in the warm feeling being with his boyfriend gave him. His chest felt tight and his entire body was warm. He made himself get out of bed eventually and made his way to the kitchen. On the counter sat a bagel, a glass of juice, and a piece of paper with words scribbled on it. Hinata’s heart felt so full it was going to burst. He picked up the note, his eyes trailing over the words.
‘Good morning I love you, Sho. Enjoy this bagel and have a good day. I’ll see you when I get off :)’
Hinata felt a lump growing in his throat at the memory, the kitchen was so dull these days. He glanced at the fridge, looking at all the notes to and from each other they had stuck there. He realized how much he missed the notes Kageyama used to write to him every morning when he left for work. Suddenly, he wasn’t so hungry anymore.
“Hi, what can I get for you?” Kageyama drawled for about the 20th time this morning. He had a polite smile on his face, but he refused to ‘put some pep into his voice’ as his manager said. Kageyama simply didn’t have the energy.
I’m thinking of ending things.
Kageyama cleared his throat, his hands felt clammy. “H-hi, um, how can I get started for you?” He stammered out then slapped his hand over his mouth, his face turning red when he realized what he’d said. “I mean, uh, what can I get started for you?” It was his second-week working here and he still messed that up. Especially when there were cute boys in front of him.
The boy in front of him laughed and covered his smile with his hand. “Well,” his eyes dropped down to the nametag on Kageyama’s shirt. “Tobio, could I get a chocolate chip bagel and… an iced coffee?”
“Sure. Could I get a name for that order?” He asked and glanced up from the register to meet the boy’s eyes.
“Shoyo.”
A hand waved in front of his eyes and made Kageyama snap back to reality. He was still at work, the day was dragging on and on. “Earth to Kageyama… I know tonight is usually your date night with your boyfriend, but can you keep your mind off it while you’re on the clock?” His manager, Suga, asked him teasingly. He was more of a friend than he was a manager. He leaned against the counter beside his and crossed his arms over his chest.
Kageyama punched his shoulder with an eye roll. “Shut up. I wasn’t thinking about him.” The last word came out bitterly and he looked away from his friend. He was caught. He knew there was something wrong.
“Uh oh… trouble in paradise?” Suga asked and waggled his eyebrows. He kept the mood light, Kageyama liked that.
He looked down at the ground as the words came tumbling out of his mouth, “I’m thinking of ending things.”
Hinata glanced at the clock Kageyama would be off soon and usually, Thursday nights were their date night but with all that had been going on recently, Hinata wasn’t really in the mood for that. So, he had taken an extra shift. A date tonight probably would have been awkward anyway, plus they needed the money. He didn’t feel too bad, maybe a little guilty he hadn’t texted Kageyama, but it was fine. He left a note on the counter for him.
‘Took an extra shift. Won’t be back till late. You don’t have to wait up for me.’
I’m thinking of ending things.
“Okay so that one is Orihime, uh, I’m pretty sure it is anyway. Maybe it’s Hikoboshi?” Kageyama spoke quickly, his arm extended towards the sky as he pointed at the stars. Hinata could tell he was excited to share this information with him. They were pressed against one another, shoulder to shoulder, on a blanket laying in the grass.
Hinata couldn’t see where Kageyama was pointing but he was happy to try and find which stars he was talking about himself. He sounded so excited talking about the stars, Hinata couldn’t help but sneak a look at the boy beside him. His mouth was stretched into a bright grin, his cheeks looked flushed, but it was dark out so Hinata couldn’t really tell. Kageyama dropped his hand down and Hinata watched as his eyes flicked from the sky down to where their hands rested. It wasn’t a second later that he felt the brush of Kageyama’s finger against his pinky. Another second passed and he felt the warm slide of Kageyama’s palm against his as the boy interlaced their fingers together. Hinata looked back towards the sky quickly, now it was him who’s cheeks were flushed.
A single tear escaped from his eyes as he thought about that night, three years ago, their first date, at the Tanabata festival. He wiped it away before it could even track it’s way down his cheek. Maybe he should fix things, but at this point, he wasn’t sure how to do that.
Kageyama closed the door behind him with a quiet click. The apartment was dark and empty and life seemed to have been sucked out of it. Hinata wasn’t home. This was the third week in a row that they had skipped date night because his boyfriend worked an extra shift. Kageyama flicked the light on as he walked further into the apartment, glancing at the counter. Sure enough, a note was there. He didn’t even bother reading it, they said the same thing every time. Kageyama collapsed on the couch with a heavy sigh, his head dropping into his hands.
I’m thinking of ending things.
A warm solid weight slammed into Kageyama’s side, pressing him into the couch as arms slid around his waist. “Mmph!” was all the sound he could make at the surprise attack. A soft giggle erupted from the boy on his chest.
“I’m home,” Hinata said, still giggling. She lifted his head from Kageyama’s chest and grinned widely at his boyfriend. “Did ya miss me?”
Kageyama snorted and rolled his eyes at the other boy playfully. “Of course. I always miss you when you’re gone,” he murmured.
Hinata’s entire face lit up at his words. “So cheesy!” He laughed and brought his face right up in front of Kageyama’s, blocking his view from everything else but his boyfriend’s face. “I-” lips pressed to Kageyama’s forehead “hate-” he feels the warm press of lips move to his nose “it.” The final words are punctuated with a firm kiss to his lips.
Kageyama grinned and pulled away. “Your actions speak louder than your words.”
He stood up from the couch immediately and glared at the piece of furniture as if it had purposely supplied him with the offending memory. He didn’t want to think about all the happy stuff right now, it was only pissing him off and making him feel worse than he already did. Kageyama couldn’t even pinpoint the exact moment where it had all gone wrong. He felt like Hinata was drifting away from him and he couldn’t do anything about it.
He felt giddy and nervous, like a high schooler with a crush. Hinata hadn’t felt this way in months. He wasn’t even sure exactly the last time he had felt like this. He hid his smile behind his hand as he leaned against the bar. The boy in front of his seemed to be feeling the same way. He could tell by his smile and his flushed cheeks. Kenma had been coming to see him at the bar for the past three weeks. They’d never done anything besides talk, and Hinata knew if he were the same person he was a few months ago he would probably go home to his boyfriend with guilt weighing him down. But now he didn’t feel anything except sad that he had to wait another week to talk to Kenma in person.
“Shoyo,” The soft voice interrupted his thoughts.
Hinata raised an eyebrow and met the other boy’s eyes. “Hm?”
“Have you talked to your boyfriend yet? I thought you said you were-”
“Not yet,” He spoke before Kenma could finish his sentence. “But, I’m going to. Don’t worry ‘bout it. I’m gonna end things with him.”
I’m ending things.
“Shoyo,” A soft voice spoke from his side and he rolled his head over to look at the boy. The evening sunlight shone in through the window by his bed, giving the other boy an orange glow. His hair looked like it was on fire. He really was beautiful. “Hey Sho,” a hand moved in front of his face at his lack of response.
“Mm?”
A smile stretched across Kageyama’s lips as he reached over to tuck one of his curls behind Hinata’s ear. Her hand slid from his ear down to cup his jaw gently. “I love you.”
His breath hitched at the three words. He felt an overwhelming sense of fondness fill his chest not only from the words but from the fact that he could tell Kageyama really meant it. Hinata smiled and rolled over so he was straddling his boyfriend’s hips. He cupped his face and pressed his forehead against Kageyama’s. “I love you too.”
Hinata scrubbed at his eyes and shook his head to rid himself of the memory. Stop it. She thought to himself. He needed to stop thinking about all the old memories. None of that happened now. Their relationship felt like a chore now. When was the last time he’d said I love you and really truly meant it?
“I need to talk to you,” The words seemed too loud in their quiet apartment. Kageyama actually flinched at the sound as he lay in bed. “Don’t pretend you’re asleep I know you’re not.”
Kageyama sat up, the covers falling off of his body as he moved. His eyes caught sight of Hinata standing in the doorway of their bedroom. “You really want to talk right now? What time is it?” He asked and glanced at the clock on his nightstand. 2:25 A.M. He reached to the side and turned on the lamp, frowning immediately at the look on his boyfriend’s face. “What’s wrong with you? What happened?” He was starting to get worried now.
Hinata was quiet for a long moment. Then he spoke the few words Kageyama had been dreading for a while now. “I can’t do this anymore.” His voice might have sounded strong, but Kageyama could tell from looking at him that he was hurting.
His face crumpled and his eyes immediately welled with tears. “Don’t do this Shoyo,” Kageyama’s voice was shaking. He threw the blankets off his body and stood up. “We can… We can fix-”
“No, we can’t. Don’t lie to yourself,” Hinata interrupted and looked to the side. “Besides, I-I found someone else.”
“What?” His voice cracked. He wasn’t sure if it was from sadness, anger, or disbelief. Kageyama moved closer to Hinata and reached his hand out to the other boy tentatively. He just wanted to hold him and go back to how things used to be.
Hinata stepped back away from his hand. “I found someone else,” his voice was stronger this time. “Kageyama, be honest with yourself. When’s the last time you really felt something with me? We can’t keep tiptoeing around each other and pretending everything is how it used to be. I don’t love you anymore.”
“Hinata,” Kageyama wiped the tears that had started rolling down his cheeks. They wouldn’t stop. “You’re really just going to throw the past three years down the drain? Don’t do this to me.”
“This is over, Kageyama. I’m sorry, but we’re done.” Hinata started to back away, but he paused and glanced at Kageyama for a second. “I’ll come to get my stuff when you’re at work or something.” Then he was turning away and heading to the door.
Kageyama wanted to call out to him, tell him to come back so they could sit down and really talk about it. He was gone. The tears were still falling down his face and his chest felt empty. His entire body was aching as he lowered himself down to the floor and curled in on himself. A sob wracked his body as he wrapped his arms around himself. He had been thinking about ending things between them himself, but nothing could compare to the real thing. He really hadn't wanted it to be over. He thought they would fix it and everything would go back to normal. Instead, he was making himself sick crying on the floor of his once shared apartment.