Chapter Text
Asuma Sarutobi had been dead for a long time now. It wasn’t exactly clear to Kakuzu how much time he’d spent in prison in Konoha. After his fight, being utterly broken right down to his chakra network had made it rather irrelevant how much time had passed. The last thing he’d really remembered from that fight was Kakashi standing over him, ready to finish him for good. Kakuzu had made a split second decision that had effectively saved his life, and in honesty, reflecting on it, the Akatsuki hadn’t been worth dying for. What help would have been sent to them during that fight?
There were a lot of things that had led him to the eventual decision, but Kakuzu remembered, while choking on his own blood, he’d said he had information about the Akatsuki leader that he was willing to share… if they in fact spared his life. Hidan wasn’t coming to help him, the Akatsuki was ready to throw him away; the last time Kakuzu had been staring at the sky with blood in his lungs, he had trusted that his village would welcome him home and care for him. His failure then had meant a death sentence. It had reminded him that no matter how much he strived to follow orders, he was ultimately a pawn to be sacrificed. What good would loyalty do him to an organization that was willing to let him die like a dog?
Now, months after interrogations, what he thought might be nearly a year through his recovery, he sat… mostly a free man in the village Hidden in the Leaves. Mostly free, because everywhere he went, he knew he had the eyes of the ANBU black ops on his shoulders. There might never be a time when they trusted him completely. His court for release had ruled that since he indeed wasn’t the one directly responsible for Asuma Sarutobi’s murder, and given the information that had saved Master Jiraiya’s life in the end, his debt had been paid. His information had even lead to the Leaf being able to keep the Akatsuki at bay, and push back their plans.
Of course there had been more nuance than a simple life for a life. Kakuzu had proved during his time in prison that he had been repentant, if not utterly bitter when weighed down by the information he’d been sharing with the Leaf. At times, he felt almost like a puppet, speaking by strings. There had been a time during his interrogation that he couldn’t have been a threat if he tried. His chakra network for a time had been completely severed by whatever jutsu Naruto had used against him. And there were moments where Kakuzu had spent awake in his hospital bed wondering…
Had he let that Jutsu hit him on purpose? Had he really been that tired of being used? Was he so ready to be finished then? Was that how Sasori had felt at the end too? It seemed those weeks leading to his friend’s death, he’d been more quiet and calculative than usual. It was Sasori’s notes that had led him to information about the true nature of their organization. Sasori had always been phenomenal at reconnaissance.
Now, Kakuzu sat on the roof of one of the buildings in the Leaf’s market, surrounded by the sound of people below doing their daily shopping. His gaze was locked on one of the stone behemoth statues above him. Hashirama. His first lesson in what loyalty to the wrong people really meant. He could still remember his thoughts from when he had been young, headstrong, and so sure of himself. Facing down the God of Shinobi, Kakuzu was eager to make his village finally proud of him. Coming from a nowhere background, brimming with talent, he had been so certain that bringing the first Hokage’s head to his village leaders would bring him recognition.
As he had laid there, with rain pattering his face like tears from the heavens, Hashirama had looked down over him, and should have killed him. Sometimes in his nightmares he would blink, and see Kakashi. Maybe back then if he had pursued a friendship with Hashirama, things would be different. He would probably be long dead, not having stolen his village’s secret Jutsu. He wouldn’t have to live with the weight of his life’s failures every time he went outside under the gaze of that stone face looking over the village.
“Hey! Old man Kakuzu!” The voice shook Kakuzu from his despairing thoughts. He turned his attention down to the bustling streets to find Naruto waving at him from the seats at Ichiraku. He inhaled and swallowed his annoyance, counting quietly the one, two, three, four black ops keeping an eye on him at the moment. At least in the ramen stand, he’d have half shelter from it.
Sorely, he stood up and brushed off his jacket. He would have been more comfortable being able to wear his mask, but it was a condition amongst authorities that they needed to be able to see his face. To that effect, to keep himself seemingly compliant, he even tied his hair up into a bun. Most of the time he felt utterly exposed; he quelled that line of thought, hopping down to join Naruto at Ichiraku.
“What do you want, Kid?” He asked settling himself on one of the stools. He held up his hand to indicate a number on the menu to Teuchi. “Ripping me apart not enough?” It was a gruff sort of tease, and Naruto took it pretty well.
“Aw c’mon. If you weren’t so old, maybe you would have stood a chance,” he threw back, leaning on the counter. “It’s not my fault you’re such a geezer.”
“Didn’t anyone ever tell you that you were supposed to respect your elders, Naruto?” Kakuzu grouched back. He checked his wallet to make sure he had enough to cover his lunch. Being an ex con, and being unable to go on missions or collect bounties had left him reliant on what little the village was willing to give him.
“Yeah yeah. I’m supposed to tell you that you’re overdue to see Granny Tsunade,” he told Kakuzu flatly, unamused. Kakuzu knew that already. He felt stiff and fatigued, worn down by the tasks that he could get around the village. Not a lot of people were keen to trust an ex Akatsuki member around their home… but maybe that’s why he got along so well with Naruto. Not a lot of people had been quick to trust the boy either, so he’d been told.
“Is that right?” He said slowly. “It must have slipped my mind.”
“It’s because you’re practically ancient, Grandpa Kakuzu. You gotta be more careful you know? Keep missing those appointments and Granny Tsunade said you won’t ever heal right. I mean I beat you once, but if you’re gonna be part of the village, I don’t want that to mean I put you out forever, you know? We need everyone at 100%, even someone like you.”
“Someone like me?” Kakuzu repeated, raising both his brows at the kid. That could mean anything. An Akatsuki member, a barely human ancient terror, a geezer-- which one was he referring to? “You better watch it you brat. This mind of mine isn’t as absent as you think it is.” He could feel his annoyance bubbling up to break free again. When he glanced to his side again, the blue eyes and blond hair, the shiteating grin… Kakuzu swore he was looking at another person. When he blinked, however, it was definitely Naruto sitting there.
“You sure? That stare is starting to creep me out,” Naruto remarked, getting distracted by the bowl of ramen set in front of him.
“I’ve just about had enough of you, you little brat,” he snarled, and sat back as his own bowl was set in front of him. He bowed his head respectfully to Ayame in thanks,
“Settle down you two,” Teuchi warned them, pointing his ladle at the both of them. “This is a restaurant. If things are going to escalate you can take it to the training grounds.” Living in a village of hot heads, the ramen stand had probably seen its share of fights, and Kakuzu wasn’t eager to undo all the healing he’d gone through already. Despite the Jutsus he relied on for keeping himself young, there were parts of him that had felt like they had aged… mainly his patience. Murder would definitely get him sent right back to jail.
Kakuzu cracked his chopsticks apart and looked down at the bowl before him. Calculating the cost, he slotted it into his extra expenses in his budget in his mind. He wouldn’t regret it though. The less time he had to spend in his depressing little apartment, the better.
“Don’t you have better things to do than bully the elderly?” Kakuzu asked Naruto, finally taking a bite of his ramen.
“Oh yeah! Master Jiraiya and I are going out training again to work on that killer jutsu Kakashi sensei helped me develop. With the Akatsuki pushed back, we have more time to worry about making time to deal with Sasuke. When I meet him again, I want to make sure I’m at my strongest. I won’t lose to him again,” Naruto exclaimed, then shoved more noodles into his mouth. He finished off drinking his broth, then ordered another bowl. “It’s kind of a double edged sword you know… that jutsu. There are other things we need to do research on too. Kurama and I are working better as partners you know? I want to learn how to control that power to my best ability!”
It would never cease to amaze him… the advancement of the generations. When he’d been Naruto’s age, the tailed beasts had been not but a rumor in the wind. He couldn’t help the minute smile that tugged at his lips, but hid it behind another bite of ramen. It was strange to share a meal with someone like this after everything they’d gone through. In his culture, it meant something to share a meal with someone as equals. Maybe one day he’d be able to teach Naruto about what things had been like in the Hidden Falls.
“It sounds like you’re going to keep getting stronger,” Kakuzu admitted, sitting back on his stool. “Over all this time I’ve been in this world, I’ve seen the advancement of Jutsu and technique, and the greatest shinobi I’ve met all have something in common… They never seem to give up on bettering themselves and the people around them,,” he told Naruto. It may have been a moment of vulnerability, but the kid had earned it. Naruto had destroyed all of his hearts in one blow. He was strong, and he was only going to get stronger. It would be foolish to be bitter about the generations beyond him getting inevitably stronger. That was what they were meant to do.
“Thanks Gramps!” Naruto set his bowl down and grinned at him. “Hey, maybe I’ll see you after your appointment with Granny Tsunade or something. Thanks for lunch!” He shot Kakuzu a smile, and then he was taking off down the road. What?! Kakuzu felt rage overflow. He knocked his stool over to stand up and shout after Naruto, but he was gone.
“Here’s your bill,” Teuchi smiled, handing him the receipt, and Kakuzu could feel his heart drop down through his stomach. Living an honest life was hard enough, but it only got harder when noodle rats were scamming him out of lunch. It reminded him of a part of his life that he swore he would never think about again; his poverty in childhood. He scowled and looked in his wallet, pulling out all the ryo he had, counting it.
Embarrassment clutched his chest, making his anger worse. Kakuzu’s shoulders tensed as he prepared himself to face the staff, his bowl half empty. He felt like he could throw up his lunch onto the counter if it would have helped.
“I don’t have enough--”
“That’s just like Naruto,” Ayame interrupted him. She put her hands on her hips and blew her bangs out of her face. “This isn’t the first time he’s done that to someone, though Iruka sensei is usually the one footing the bill.”
“Don’t worry about it this time,” Teuchi responded, turning his back tensely to Kakuzu. He knew better than to mistake kindness in the moment for someone liking him. This was pity, and it made Kakuzu’s stomach roil.
“I’m a hard worker,” Kakuzu finally burst out. “I don’t like being in debt to people… but I can work when I have time to make up for this.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Teuchi responded, using a hot towel to dry the glasses by the sink. “Everyone deserves to eat… even criminals turning over a new leaf.”
“Dad, weren’t you saying the other day that we could use a little extra help with the deliveries? Since the village is doing better than ever, we’ve got a ton of orders… it wouldn’t be too bad if we had someone to help out and deliver.”
From S-rank feared criminal, to ramen delivery boy…
“I suppose you’re right about that.”
Great… what had he gotten himself into? Still, a paycheck was a paycheck.
“If you’re serious Kakuzu, we’ll see you tomorrow morning,” Teuchi said sternly to him. “And don’t even think about being late. We open early.”
“Six am, if I remember correctly,” Kakuzu muttered, and turned his stool upright. He finished his lunch despite the protest in his gut. He wasn’t a man to waste food. “I’ll see you then,” he grumped, and nodded his head gratefully to Ayame, then made his escape to try his best to nurse his ego.
Kakuzu made his way to the hokage building, ignoring the stares of some curious children who had pointed at him on his way by. If they thought he was something interesting to look at, they should meet Kisame; Kisame probably would have had more patience for the little bastards too. Being around so many people reminded him a little why he’d decided to live amongst circus folk for so long. At least being surrounded by freaks, he wasn’t the only one that they were looking at. Was he thinking about the Akatsuki? Or was he thinking about the actual circus he had joined in his youth? It was hard to settle on which one he missed more at the moment. At least the circus didn’t send him on a suicide mission.
He rapped his knuckle against Tsunade’s office door, waiting for a signal before stepping through.
“Ah, there you are,” she greeted, not looking up from her files. Every time Kakuzu saw her he found it eerie. Looking into the face of the granddaughter of the man who had nearly ended his life. Living in this village felt like a giant mistake sometimes.
“Naruto said you wanted to see me,” he grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest.
“You’ve missed your last 3 physicals,” she told him matter of factly. “Leaving your chakra network to heal by itself won’t end well for you, you know that don’t you?”
Kakuzu was more than aware. There were some nights where he sat up in pain, heat packs pressed to the parts of him that hurt the most.
“So let’s get it over with. I’m going to have Sakura observe me this time so she can learn how to repair such delicate systems,” Finally, she stood from her desk, and Kakuzu wrinkled his nose. He’d had quite enough of being a spectacle for the day, but it didn’t seem like he had much choice in the matter. Sakura glanced at him steadily from over her books. It looked like she wanted to be there about as much as he did. Chuffing in indignation, he removed his jacket, and then his shirt to reveal the stitches and scars that littered his body. Despite being down and out for so long, Kakuzu was beginning to regain his muscle mass from gentle workouts at the training ground.
He settled himself down on one of the chairs in the room, refusing to uncross his arms from his chest. There, amongst all the scars and stitches, was the painfully new scar from where Kakashi had impaled him with his lightning blade… and his stomach bore the scar of where he’d been directly hit with the rasenshuriken. He noticed Sakura looking at the scar on his stomach, and so he fixed her with a glare, but she stood unwavering. Medical shinobi were of a different breed entirely, and it would take more than Kakuzu being cantankerous to shake Sakura off.
“Have you at least been doing your exercises?” Tsunade asked, forcing him to sit forward.
“Yes,” Kakuzu growled shortly, shifting himself. He’d been sure to sit for a couple of hours every other day and work on circulating his chakra through his body, focusing on where it was hardest to accumulate. It would still be a long while before he was in top condition again.
“Good, at least you’re not completely irresponsible,” she remarked. “Sakura come here, what do you feel?” The girl circled Kakuzu, and he kept his gaze on her, feeling like a cornered and injured animal. He felt her place her hand on one of his shoulders and channel her chakra against his own network.
“Oh… wow. It’s like--”
“A scar,” Tsunade confirmed. He definitely wasn’t as skilled as these two in medical ninjutsu, but he knew enough to know that that wasn’t good. “You idiot, this is why you shouldn’t be skipping your appointments. That scarring on your chakra network is going to confuse the signals you give your body. It’ll act like a frayed wire now, and repairing it is going to take a lot more time. Are you trying to get yourself killed? Imagine you try to use a jutsu in battle and that part of your chakra network misfires. You’ll be screwed.”
“I get it,” Kakuzu snarled back. “It’s a little difficult to get in here, AND do enough to make a living wage, miss Hokage,” Kakuzu shot back, sending the room into a venomous silence. Nothing else was said through the appointment, and Kakuzu was sure that if he focused hard enough, he might just be able to set her stupid little pig on fire with his mind. Though… he did have to admit that he felt a lot better after they’d worked him over. It was like the aches in all his muscles had settled, and he was feeling much more humbled by their ability.
While Tsunade went back to her desk and her paperwork, Sakura was left to clean up the packages for the heat packs they’d applied to especially tender areas under his ribs and around his abs where the worst of the core chakra damage had been done. While Kakuzu tugged his jacket on, he made eye contact with her briefly, then glanced away sourly.
“Thank you,” Kakuzu spoke, his voice still quiet. It wasn’t that he was ungrateful, but he was a little begrudging due to the circumstances.
“You’re welcome Mr. Kakuzu,” Sakura replied, standing up straighter; she looked surprised, like she hadn’t expected him to be capable of saying anything pleasant at all. Sakura knew well enough though that not so great circumstances laced with pain could make anyone hard to get along with. She gave him her most convincing smile. “Try not to wait so long between appointments next time and you won’t have to deal with so much pain.”
He wasn’t so sure about that… but it wasn’t terrible advice. Kakuzu simply gave her a curt nod, then zipped his jacket up. He gave a short wave before escaping out the door before he could be trapped into more conversation. He didn’t want to have to talk about his situation, or deal with having to talk about medical problems he might be facing. He was able to walk, talk, and wipe his own ass, that was enough for him right now. Not being tied to a hospital bed or a jail cell was more than he ever expected out of this arrangement.
When he left the building, the hard shadows of dusk had begun to descend down over the village. Had he really been in there that long? It wouldn’t surprise him, considering how much damage they’d been talking about that was still wreaking havoc on his system. It still seemed odd to walk through the Leaf at night. Not many people were left in the market district, but the bars were beginning to get busy with people returning from missions. Kakuzu envied some of them. At least if he was able to go out on missions he could get a break from Hashirama’s scrutinizing stone gaze.
As he walked down the street, a crisp breeze picking up dust from the brick pathways, Kakuzu heard a clattering from down the way. His sharp green eyes flicked up to find the source, focusing in on Kurenai standing outside a vegetable stall. The bottom had fallen out of her grocery bag, cans and goods hitting the ground. She looked on at them with distressed annoyance. It wouldn’t have been that big of a deal for anyone else, but Kurenai’s stomach was round and taut, ready to burst from her pregnancy any day now. Dread overcoming him, Kakuzu waited a moment to see if anyone else was going to help her.
When nobody else seemed to be around to help, Kakuzu pinched the bridge of his nose, took a deep breath and approached carefully.
“Let me,” he said quietly, and crouched for the furthest items first. He gathered up a couple of cans, using his threads to gather things closer to her. The last thing he wanted was to make her feel threatened by getting too close. Would that be enough to send him back to prison? He had no idea, but his partner had killed her lover, and that enough probably was enough for her to never, ever want to see his face. To his surprise though…
“Thank you,” she offered, a slight tone of relief in her voice. Kakuzu rummaged through his pockets and found his reusable grocery bag, opening it. He placed the objects inside, only to be startled by an abrupt voice ringing through the night.
“Get the HELL away from her.” Suddenly, Kakuzu had no control over his hand that had been reaching for one of the oranges that continued to roll down the pavement. Shikamaru’s shadow possession jutsu had him stuck.
“I can’t really do anything in the clutches of that jutsu of yours,” Kakuzu replied, irritated. He looked up to peer at the picturesque figure of rage standing before him. There were few people that hated Kakuzu more than Shikamaru. When the verdict had been announced that he would go free from prison, they practically had to sedate him from his seething animosity. It was his opinion, amongst many others, that once the information had been extracted from him, he should be put to death. There were probably many like-minded individuals in this world. Those who were missing loved ones that Kakuzu had turned in for a bounty. There were some that could never separate the idea of him from Hidan. The murders Hidan was guilty of, he was just as guilty of in their books. That was most true of the death of Asuma Sarutobi, and Shikamaru would never, ever let him forget it.
“What in the hell right do you think you have huh?” Shikamaru snarled at him.
“Let him go,” Kurenai warned Shikamaru gently. She had noticed the ANBU beginning to move to break up the altercation. Not only were they there to keep an eye out for Kakuzu acting dangerously, they were there for Kakuzu’s protection from the village trying to carry out justice of their own. After a resentful moment of hateful silence, Shikamaru spat at the ground, and released the jutsu. Kakuzu stood carefully, backing away from the grocery bag he’d started to fill. Kakuzu could feel the revulsion in the air, and he knew that if the laws had been a little looser, he and Shikamaru would be locked in another battle right now. Not having been totally helpless, Kakuzu had been ready to defend himself if it had been necessary. What a disaster the day had been. Even his best intentions were met with the worst kind of reactions.
Kakuzu raised his hands slowly to show Shikamaru, Kurenai, and the ANBU watching on that he was unarmed, and ceding the altercation. He backed away from them, Shikamaru’s eyes locked on him as he walked away down the street. Once he was nearly out of sight, Kakuzu caught a glimpse of Shikamaru picking up where he’d left off picking up the groceries.
Pushing his hands into his pockets, Kakuzu didn’t look up again until he’d made it back to his apartment. Sliding the key in the door, he slipped into the darkness with some gratefulness for the semi-privacy it gave him. While he knew his walls had eyes, at least they resembled something like a home. It was a simple bachelor suite, with a bed, a kitchen table, and a kitchenette in the same room… but it was better than nothing. With the curtains peeked open, the early moonlight began to leak through the window, illuminating the sad little plant on his kitchen table. The leaves, despite his best effort, were beginning to wilt.
“Pebble…?” Kakuzu lifted the tablecloth to peer at the small black cat curled up on his dining chair. “Have you been chewing on my plant again?” He asked her, only to be met with a slow and lazy blink. Of everyone in the entire village… Kakuzu knew that at least Pebble liked him, if only because he filled her food dish. He reached out a gentle hand and rubbed the side of her muzzle to be met by her flopping on her side to stretch her paws out and show off her little knife feet.
“Yeah, I also react to affection by pulling out ten knives,” he told her with a gentle coo. Feeling calmer, he knew he had to act quickly if he wanted the next part of his night to be successful. The appointment with Tsunade earlier would definitely help this go smoothly, but there were no guarantees he could go on without getting caught. Kakuzu ducked under the table to make it look to the ANBU as if he were going under to claim his cat. While down there, he had his shadow clone grab Pebble and back out again, going to sit by the window. There were only two exits. From his apartment, and his shadow clone would need to leave the apartment for him to also leave undetected.
The clone sat and pet Pebble for a while, and then let her down again. The clone then left, headed for the nearest bar. It would be twenty minutes before Kakuzu would move while using a shrouding Jutsu to make his way from his apartment into the alley system. It had been Pebble that had accidentally shown him her way in and out of the village. Following where her pawsteps lead him before, Kakuzu walked through shadows and the quietest parts of the village before slipping in a nearly too narrow hole in the wall that hadn’t been patched since Orochimaru had attacked the Leaf several years prior.
Once he was outside the village walls, Kakuzu picked up his pace. There would only be a short amount of time before that clone was discovered. He had to make it to the border and back before sunrise…
He was swift, choosing routes through the trees where he’d marked himself, trailing a path that would lead to his rendezvous point with one of his old contacts. The trees were thick, and it was almost impossible to see his markers at this time of night, the thick leaf coverage keeping the moonlight from shining down into the ruffage. Kakuzu had to stop several times, catching his breath as he leaned on the trees, annoyed that his body still was so far away from being what it used to be. He took a flask from his jacket and took a small drink of water before continuing his last stretch to the border.
Once he found the abandoned shack, he slipped inside, and waited for his contact to find him. His thighs shook with the effort it took to stand, and Kakuzu slid down the wall, reluctantly sitting. He ducked his head down to hang between his knees for a few minutes. It was 45 minutes before the door quietly opened again, and Kakuzu was met with a cloaked figure.
“It’s been a long time Mr. Kakuzu,” the gravelly voice greeted him.
“I’ve been busy,” he puffed, lifting his head.
“Word on the street was that you were dead,” the man replied, taking a seat on a crate across the room.
“Good. Keep it that way,” Kakuzu replied. “I don’t want unsavory individuals tracking me down here. I’ve got enough to deal with without having to bring the Akatsuki back into it. Did you bring my things?”
“Of course I did,” the contact answered, pulling a briefcase out of his cloak. “You pay just as well as Sasori did, and I never let him down.” Kakuzu got up slowly and made his way over, picking up the briefcase. He entered the combination on the lock, finding stacks of his savings there, along with an ornate scroll. He plucked up each stack of cash and counted it meticulously, making sure each bill was present. Once he was sure, Kakuzu handed the contact his cut, and snapped the case closed.
“I can’t stay and make small talk. I’m on a tight schedule,” he informed the man.
“Of course, until next time Mr. Kakuzu,” the contact answered, making a quick hand sign. He was gone in a cloud of smoke. Kakuzu took one more moment to make sure he was rested enough before stepping out of the building. As he straightened out his jacket, Kakuzu had been so sure he wasn’t followed. Unable to sense any surrounding Chakra, it caught him completely off guard when somebody landed beside him.
“You know… it’s stunts like abandoning your guard detail that make people unwilling to trust you. Keep this up and they’ll throw you back in prison,” the figure told him, a flicker of red catching Kakuzu’s gaze. Kakashi.
He’d been caught.