Archive of Our Own

There was an old legend that said that every human soul that inhabits the Earth was once part of a flickering star, somewhere in the galaxy. Old souls that cruised the skies for years, decades, sometimes centuries and an eternity, until the day were no longer infinite and instead of blinking up among us, they would shine close to the ground.

Those stars, the ones that the goddess granted with too much fire – the ones that were granted with the power to become a soul – when the right time comes, they indeed would transcend and, finally, become souls.

Souls. They were all too bright to become one, here, on Earth. So those stars, the fire that made them alive would divide – sometimes in two, sometimes more – and like that, they would create life; lives… Soulmates.

Some of these stars, these soulmates, would walk around for their new eternity on Earth without ever crossing each other’s paths, but whenever they did, nothing could ever tear them apart.

That connection between bits of those souls, those starts, they were so strong that whenever they met, an explosion, invisible to human eyes, would spark between their minds and the very first words that crossed them would find a way to where they belonged and live forever on each other’s skin; on the flesh that made those souls human, and once again, they would be connected through their new eternity.

Or so they said.

Jaehyun grew up to those stories and his grandmother would always indulge him in all those questions a curious kid could possibly make as he stared at the night sky.

Some souls, his grandma used to say, would eventually meet, but it was too fast – and in modern days it would happen more often than not, as people rushed through subway stairs and busy streets, too focused on their own little lives – for them to notice when the words would appear.

Jaehyun was always paying attention.

As he grew old, Jaehyun saw a few soulmate marks on people he actually knew – tattoos, as most people would say – and not only on those romantic, sappy movies. Both his grandparents and, luckily, his own parents had their own. Johnny, his best friend, had one in Korean on his arm. It showed up when he was sixteen and visited his grandparents during summer. His boyfriend also had one, only it was in English.

Ten had one too, but it was in Chinese and he wasn’t sure where it showed up but he noticed that on the plane on his way back from China after this dancing camp when they were in college. Now Ten collected tattoos as he collected earrings and he said his soulmate was his dancing. “Whatever floats your boat, dude,” Johnny used to tell him.

Winwin also had it, but it was in Korean and showed up as soon as he moved in, and it was one of the first things Jaehyun really talked about with his new classmate.

“Oh this?” Jaehyun still remembered the way his friend shrugged. “It showed up last morning, but I don’t believe in this kind of thing.”

And Jaehyun wouldn’t blame him. Not when his friend was about to get married with his Chinese girlfriend he’s been dating since sophomore year and Jaehyun had never seen a couple their age so happy.

Jaehyun didn’t have one, neither had Mark, or Taeyong, or Taeil, or Jungwoo. It didn’t matter, most of them used to say.

But for Jaehyun, it mattered. 

--

“I’m gonna grab something to drink.” Jaehyun spoke as loud as he could, into Mark’s ears, as the loud thuds of the heavy bass music seemed to echo not only on the dark walls, but on Jaehyun’s ribcage. It really was like it thumbled on his chest. 

Moving to Japan wasn’t really his choice - if only a three-months training overseas with their new partner could ever be considered “moving”. It was temporary, Jehyun knew that, and so did Mark. Three months, thirteen weeks - twelve and a half; eighty-seven days, now, if Jaehyun was counting - until they’d be back to Seoul and their new partner would send their japanese team over, instead. 

Jaehyun wasn’t counting. 

It wasn’t like he didn’t want it either. It was… Well, Jaehyun didn’t know how to explain this awkward feeling that made his stomach flutter every time he thought about it before moving - Johnny said it was just anxiety, but Jaehyun had felt anxious before, just never this way. It didn’t help that he felt like that all the way during their flight last Tuesday, neither when he stepped inside the tall glass building, so much like their own. Except that Resonance Company, their japanese partner, owned the building, while NeoZone - the start-up Mark, Johnny, Jungwoo and him started only two years ago and as soon as Jungwoo graduated - only occupied a double room in the corner of the eighth floor of their building, back in Seoul. 

It didn’t help that it happened every day when he woke up ever since they moved in, only four days ago. 

It really didn’t help that the feeling hasn’t gone this time, not since they stepped inside that nightclub with bright green neon lights flickering by the entrance, to meet their new co-workers so they could introduce both Mark and him to Tokyo’s nightlife. 

They hadn’t met the whole team yet, so it was the director of the japanese design team that actually suggested it. Well… not really, but mr. Kim Jongin - or just Kai, his nickname since he moved to Japan and how their team called him; and now Mark and Jaehyun too - took both of them under his wings as soon as they stepped inside the building under the pretence he was happy to see someone from “home” around, and he seemed genuine as the days passed by, to a point it made it impossible to decline the invitation to dinner with their team that friday night after work. Kai didn’t drink, so the nightclub wasn’t the director's idea, but it was the perfect call after a small dinner with their closer team, “so they could finally meet everyone else”, or so Shotaro, one of their interns, said.

And now there was Jaehyun, leaning on the counter of some fancy, rooftop nightclub with black leather couches on semi-private booths that circled the dance floor, as he tried to order a bottle of beer and he’d never been happier about their party deciding on individual checks, instead of the usual senior-junior drinking formalities - perks of having a multicultural team, one of them said; besides, they already did that at the restaurant. Jaehyun probably had enough sake for one night, so yeah... He should definitely stick with something lighter. 

They had just arrived at the club and were quickly introduced to their other, new, coworkers -  the ones that were on their reserved booth on the second floor, that was - and after quick greetings and ten minutes of Jaehyun feeling like a fish out of water, it was definitely his call for a drink - and out of their table.

It was when Jaehyun (finally!) took the first sip from his bottle of beer that he spotted him. 

The lights flickered green, and white, and blue, and pink, and all those colors around them, matching the frantic beats of some song that Jaehyun thought he maybe had heard before - he wasn’t sure - and they reflected bright and ethereal in that smile, in those bright strands of hair that barely reached the guy’s shoulders. Slim shoulders, toned, but still slim arms, bare by the black tank top that cut around his ribs and showed more than it was probably healthy for Jaehyun’s brain, but oh, it was enough to make Jaehyun’s heart jump, hard and unsteady. 

But it wasn’t just that. That smile, those eyes, bright like the lights in the darkened dance floor, the way his shoulders moved as he danced - and walked! - towards the bar, and the way he smiled and turned and moved and he talked - or singed, Jaehyun didn’t know; he was awestruck. It was everything about that person, so beautiful, that stood out in the middle of so many people that Jaehyun never seen before, in this place that Jaehyun had never been before, in a way that never happened to Jaehyun, it was like walking into a dream. 

Or dreaming awake.

A dream Jaehyun never dared to dream before, but at the same time, it was like a déjà vu: Jaehyun had seen that guy before, probably in a dream.

Oh my God - was all that even possible? - It was the person of his dreams - maybe they had put something in his drink. Or maybe… they didn’t - He was the man of Jaehyun’s undreamed dreams. 

Jaehyun was still in that kind of trance when the guy reached the bar right beside him, almost invading his personal space and that made little to help Jaehyun snap out of that state, but when the guy turned sideways and Jaehyun saw him from up close - and how could someone look so gorgeous, so endearing, under those freaking lights? 

His dark eyes beamed, like his smile and those lips, perfectly shaped that grinned somewhere Jaehyun couldn’t care less - he was mesmerized by those lips - and that made his own lips move into a smirk that Jaehyun couldn’t hold back - oh, what it would be to kiss those lips. Jaehyun couldn’t take his eyes from those lips, that suddenly turned into a thin line and just as fast, the smile that drowned Jaehyun in the middle of that chaotic place, was no longer a smile. And when Jaehyun finally managed to take his eyes from them, the guy was staring right at him with a frown. 

Shit.

“Hey, Jaehyung!” Jaehyun quickly turned towards the voice that called him and, seriously, he was never this glad to hear Mark’s voice before. “Dude,” Mark called again as he approached him, but before he could answer, someone else did it for him. 

“Oh, Mark Lee!” 

“Oppa!” Mark answered back and Jaehyun frowned - What the hell was wrong with Mark? - but what really surprised him - shocked even - was when Mark and the guy with perfect lips and the most beautiful smile that Jaehyun had ever seen, met in a tight embrace and soon the loud music had the company of Mark’s and the stranger’s laugh. “Oh man, I didn’t know you’d be here!”

“Yeah, I got back this afternoon when they told me about your welcome party.” The guy chuckled and his broad smile was back, bright and beautiful, towards Mark. “How’s Tokyo treating you? Please tell me you didn’t have takoyaki without me.”

Mark’s laugh was even louder, but Jaehyun could see the slight embarrassment in his friend as he covered his mouth with his fist. 

“No dude, it’s not our party! It’s just… a get together.”

“Relax, Mark Lee.”

Jaehyun didn’t know what to do when the guy pinched Mark’s cheek - he was missing something important there, he could tell - and Mark actually laughed as he pushed the guy’s hand.

“Dude.” Mark still smiled when he turned to Jaehyun, then back at the guy, and patted Jaehyun’s shoulder. “Hey, hyung, have you met Jaehyun, yet?” 

--

Jaehyun didn’t remember much from that night when he woke up that Saturday morning. 

He remembered work - gladly, or not really as he rather not really have to deal with that while hungover on a weekend. He remembered dinner with Mark and Kai and Shotaro and two other guys and the only girl from their team. He remembered they went to a nice night club after that and the noise and music and meeting a lot of people he couldn’t really remember their names so early and with his brain pulsing inside his head. 

He remembered one name, though, and it was Yuta; Mark’s friend from his Korean classes when he moved to Seoul back in his freshman year. the same Yuta Mark talked about every now and them ever since, and that always insisted they should try sending one of their projects to - “maybe they could get a new contract”, Mark used to say - until they did it and there they were. Yuta was the guy who introduced NeoZone to Resonance, and vice versa, and now they had the best contract of their young company live, so far - or so they hoped. 

Jaehyun remembered talking to Yuta and Mark and Kai for a while, until the director left and then Shotaro joined them for a while - or maybe they joined the younger among their team at the dance floor; Jaehyun couldn’t quite tell. But it was a pleasant night, despite the headache that still haunted him over his third cup of coffee that day. 

He was hungover, but was worth it, Jaehyun thought. He had some fun, he met some new people, but what he remembered the most was talking to yuta that night the most. 

Yuta was a nice guy - Jaehyun figured that even before he met him, by the way Mark kept telling them about his “crazy”, japanese friend - and from what he remembered. He was also hot, from what Jaehyun remembered - but a hot team mate would only and ever and always be just a nice hot teammate. 

Besides, Jaehyun dreamed about his soulmate - and he dreamed about it that night, even if he couldn’t really remember the dream, and it made his heart jump, fast and warm and… different.

Jaehyun dreamed about meeting his soulmate before. He wanted it so bad it hurted, sometimes. That morning, when he woke up with the worst headache in months and his stomach twisted as his heart beat faster and faster until he fell asleep again, his heart didn’t hurt - not this time. 

------ny------

It has been years since Yuta last saw Mark. Six years, to be precise, but it looked like it had been no longer than a couple of weeks, at most. 

Yuta still remembered when he met Mark, the only korean guy in his Korean as a second language - advanced level -  class, back in Seoul. The thing was: Mark was actually canadian and although he could speak it perfectly, his grammar wasn’t that good, and writing in hangul was a whole other deal - flaws and perks of growing up in another country. 

Yuta still remembered the huge crush he had on the sweet, freshman kid from his one semester internship in Korea, but nothing came out of it. Except that Mark was still a very dear friend and someone he always cared about, and always would. The kid was too sweet for his own sake and Yuta took him as a younger brother instead, or maybe it was Mark who adopted him as an older brother and they would often talk and meet, as much as their very opposite classes allowed them, back then. 

Yuta even met some of his friends back in Korea. Some of them who were now Mark’s business partners, like Johnny and Jungwoo and when Mark told him they had a new project that matched everything the company he worked for needed, Yuta knew he had to do something about it. 

Three months of a lot of pressure and overuse of his luring skills to convince people, he finally managed to convince Mark to convince his friends to do it. Another three months later and they finally did it! 

Back then, when they met, Yuta still believed in soulmates. The whole tattoo thing that would show up one day and people would fall in love for eternity. Not that he wanted it to happen - he had seen tattooed couples breaking up before and hating each other for eternity, instead - but it would be nice, if it happened. Most people he knew in Japan didn’t have a tattoo, and most who did, never actually met their partners and married someone else, so that soulmate thing, it really didn’t matter.

When he met Mark, he searched for a hidden tattoo on his body to suddenly appear for the first week, but it never happened. Fuck this soulmate thing. Mark was like his brother and after years and years of stepping in and out of failed and broken relationships, fuck this soulmate thing. 

Yuta wouldn’t spend the rest of his life searching for someone he might never meet, while he could meet and date and fall in and out of love how many times he wanted, for as long as he, and his partner, wanted. 

He wanted Mark to be his soulmate once, back in college and when he was still too naive, there was no denying that. But why would he want that, now that he knew better that all this soulmate thing was made for fools, who didn’t allow themselves to fall in love; to live a little? 

Now, Yuta was better off that way, with Mark as a great friend and lots of friends who had been lovers and lovers who later became friends because all this soulmate thing didn’t matter. Now, Yuta was so much better and he didn’t need no soulmate. He was free. 

Speaking of Mark, It had been awesome to meet Mark again! It would be awesome to have his friend around for the next few months and, if everything happened according to his plans, well, his boss plans, actually, he would also spend a few months in Korea later during the project. He missed Seoul. He missed the nightlife, he missed the river, he missed walking around in the city with a longing feeling he never actually understood but that, somehow, it felt like home. 

Meeting Mark again had brought back that feeling. That flitting thing in his heart that, now, Yuta knew better and it wasn’t just some infatuation towards his friend. It was about all the memories from an amazing, fulfilling time he lived back in Seoul. 

He missed that city. He missed that kind of feeling of ravishing something knew and that made his heart beat faster under the unknown. The adrenaline of waking up everyday and finding something new, something he has never seen before, be it a person or a coffee shop or just the graffiti in the corner of the street. Yuta missed all that and something else. Something he never knew how to name it.

Yuta woke up to that same feeling the morning after meeting Mark again after those long years. There was something in his dream that night, it was almost like a déjà vu, but about what, he couldn’t tell. Yuta never remembered his dreams, but that morning, the feeling followed through the day, and even later that night, when he fell asleep again. 

-- 

“This place,” Yuta paused as he pushed the glass door behind him as turned towards Mark, and Jaehyun. “Has the best takoyaki you can find in Tokyo.” He said and turned around, inside the small place covered in beige titles from its floor up to the walls, half covered by old japanese painting and pictures from his hometown, Osaka. “You can only have it any better if you come to Osaka, but I’ll take care of that later.”

“How far is it from Tokyo?” Mark asked behind him as they made the way to a table by the wall.

“Around three hours by shinkansen, or six if you want me to drive.”

“Shinkansen… The bullet train?” Jaehyun asked as he took a seat beside Mark, in front of him.

Jaehyun, Mark’s friend and other coworker who came from Korea to work with their team, was a nice guy. Actually, very nice, once he finally opened up around Yuta. 

Yuta even found himself laughing at home that same weekend, after they met, by the way he thought that Jaehyun was just another one of the jerks that tried to make a move on him in the club that night. Jaehyun was quite handsome, he wouldn’t deny that. In fact, he was more than just that, as Yuta got to take a proper look at him that night as they danced, or when they talked, or as they walked around Shibuya that Sunday afternoon, as Yuta promised to be their tour guide for a day. 

Had it been any other night Yuta would, maybe, flirt back with him, if only Jaheyun stopped staring at him with that stupid fuckboy face that he met at the bar. It was a hot, not that stupid, but indeed a fuckboy face, nonetheless, but that night Yuta was there to meet his friend and his co-workers, not flirt with fuckboys. Besides, he was done with fuckboys. 

Actually, Jaehyun probably wasn’t that much of a fuckboy. They had only met twice, first at the nightclub and then that Sunday, but Jaehyun seemed genuinely nice. 

Yuta learned that afternoon that Mark and Jaehyun had been friends since college, and met through Johnny and Ten - another one of Mark’s friends that Yuta once met - but only after Yuta had already left Korea.  

Yuta also learned that Jaehyun was a little bit shy around strangers and while Yuta still remembered the way that Jaehyun stared at his lips that night, he figured out later that Jaehyun was already a little bit drunk that night. 

Jaehyun was probably, really, a nice guy, because there was no awkwardness between them after that. Maybe a little bit, as soon as they met still in the nightclub - and he definitely looked like one of those fuckboys he used to meet on those parties - but soon enough into the night it was like they already knew each other for years, and they indeed had a lot in common, besides Mark’s friendship.

Just like meeting Mark again, meeting Jaehyun brought him that same longing feeling he always felt back in Seoul. It was probably about his slightly korean accent, like Mark’s,  whenever he tried to speak something in Japanese. Or it could be just the fact that Yuta could actually practice his Korean after years of barely speaking it that much with someone - he and mark usually texted each other, so his hangul was still in good shape. Or it was the fact that Yuta knew some Mark and Jaehyun’s friends and some of the places they talked about, he wasn’t sure. All that he knew was: Jaehyun was a nice guy, and he liked that. 

------jj------

Sharing an apartment with Mark was easier than Jaehyun had imagined, at least so far. The apartment wasn't big and their kitchen could hardly be called a kitchen as it didn’t even have a real stove - it only had a microwave, a two burners cooktop, a small fridge and a rice cooker and that was it; in fact, the whole apartment was really small. 

They had a table for two, a couch of two, a balcony for one, one bathroom, but two very small bedrooms, which was actually nice and the whole deal saved them a  lot of money. It would be for three months only - less than twelve weeks now - and, honestly, they didn't need any more than that. They would spend two thirds of their days outside -  they left home early after a quick breakfast; they had lunch somewhere near the office with the company of one of their new coworkers, most of the time and for the following week, Yuta was always there too; they would sometimes grab something to eat at home at night, or sometimes Jaehyun would just cook something easy for them - only things that would require their only pan, that was - and the only thing they actually bought was the new playstation that was set in front of their TV and where Yuta would join them on their floor - actually, it would be Mark on the couch and Yuta and Jaehyun on the floor with their backs against the couch. Yuta would sometimes lean on Mark’s legs or Mark would lean on Yuta’s head and it was awkward, at first, to watch his friend (Mark) so casually touching someone else - and that someone else being this (maybe) new friend, and new coworker, that suddenly appeared into Jaehyun’s life and in less than two weeks seemed to be had always been part this (new) life. 

One of those games nights, it was the next Saturday, or Sunday - or maybe it was Tuesday - Yuta actually leaned on Jaehyun’s shoulder as he casually beat Mark’s character ass in the game for the fifth time that night, between snacks and beer and something settled in Jaehyun’s mind; it was just Yuta, being Yuta. 

Moving to Japan and getting used to it was actually better than he expected. There was still this unsettling feeling sometimes, that same one that made him so anxious before moving, but it was less anxious now and everyday he woke to that same feeling on his chest, his heart beating faster and faster, but it also felt… right. 

“I think you’re getting used to it.Unless...” Ten told him once over the phone. “Oh my God! Are you having a heart attack? Maybe you should go see a doctor.”

“I’m not having a heart attack!”

“Who’s having a heart attack?” It was Yuta’s voice that reached through the small hall e between Mark and Jaehyun’s bedroom, before the now fully sparkling red head - Yuta dyed his hair one day ago. “Do you want me to take you to a hospital?”

“No one’s having-” Jaehyun frowned and that feeling on his chest only grew larger and his heart beat faster and, maybe, he was having a heart attack, or it was the starting point of a fucking migrane - Ten was the reason behind most his migraines. “I’m fine.” He sighed and tried to smile at Yuta, who still watched him with concerned eyes from the door. “Listen. I’ll call you later, yeah?” He told Ten instead.

“Fine. But chill or I’m telling Johnny and you know he’s gonna board on that plane with me.”

Jaehyun didn’t know if he smiled or snorted at that - seriously, his friends… - So he rolled his eyes, but smiled fondly. “G’night, hyung.”

“And don’t call me hyung! I’m only one year older than you”  Yet, Ten said it was Jaehyun the one who should chill.

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Yuta didn’t leave and Jaehyun could still feel the worry in his eyes and he couldn't help but think about how warm and caring Yuta’s eyes actually were, towards everyone. 

“Yeah, I’m sure.” 

Yuta was a nice guy, and it had been no longer than a couple of weeks, but Jaheyun could already consider him a friend. He was always around him and Mark and now that Mark also made friends with the others in the office -  just like Jaehyun did too, only slower - sometimes Yuta was just around Mark, or just around Jaehyun. And just like Kai, he could see how much he truly cared about them, like that moment as Yuta’s eyes never left him. It should be uncomfortable the way that Yuta seemed to check on him fully, as if to make sure that Jaehyun was indeed fine, but instead of awkward there was this feeling; warm and soothing and equally eering - but not awkward. 

“Okay.” Yuta finally said when their eyes met and the teasing grin on his new friend’s face was enough to make him smile - Yuta was up to something. “Wanna beat Mark’s ass again?" 

Jaehyun’s glance found the box that Yuta waved in front of him: the latest Gran Turismo Sport, brand new and unboxed. Jaehyun’s smile couldn’t possibly grow any larger and, soon, that unneasing feeling was fully replaced by the sound of cars running on the TV screen and Yuta’s laugh and cheers and Mark’s complaints, mixed with some more laughing and Yuta leaning onto his shoulder. 

------ny------

Yuta found it two days after he dyed his hair red and it took him another few days to actually look at it. 

This; the black mark on his nape and words that Yuta wasn’t sure he wanted to know, only that he would, if he wanted, it was never supposed to happen. Not with him. 

He was just about to leave for work when he saw it, as soon as tied up his hair in a short ponytail, a samurai ponytail, and he turned his back to the mirror so he could take a selfie and see how it looked. 

He really liked the red color, too bad it would fade too soon. But as he stared at the picture, at his hair that reflected in the mirror behind him and spotted the darker shade near the base of his neck, right where his back started, he first thought that, maybe, his hairstylist fucked up something real bad. But all it took was a closer look, zooming in the screen of his phone, and the dark spot beneath his hair actually turned into marks and lines and curves and.... words. 

Yuta froze. It was like all his blood rushed from his veins. It couldn’t be it. It couldn’t be this, not with him. 

Yuta had seen soulmate tattoos before and they could show up anywhere. He met a guy in college that had his on his buttcheek and a girl with one on the sole of her foot, and some people used to say that it showed up at the first thing your soulmate noticed about you, but Yuta actually doubted that. 

In fact, Yuta still doubted this whole soulmate thing and even if it was true, he didn’t want it. It wasn’t his thing, it wasn’t for him, he wasn’t into that, or whatever way people addressed it. Yuta wasn’t supposed to have a soulmate because he didn’t want to have one. He wanted to fall in and out of love, not because someone said they should. 

Maybe if he just ignored it... 

It wasn’t like it was placed somewhere people could easily see it and the length of his hair came handy at this. Yeah, he would just ignore it.

And he did. for days. Five long days where Yuta managed to pretend that there wasn’t something written on his neck, on his skin. Something that someone else actually thought about him, without even knowing him - how was that even fair? - and that would stay with him for the rest of his life. 

Yuta would dream the same dream every night ever since: it was a dark place, lights flashed in his eyes, but he couldn’t see it. There was someone staring at him, but he couldn’t see their face. He didn’t know where he was, and he seemed lost. Until he wasn’t. and his heart bumped hard inside its rib cage until he woke up covered in sweat and breathing rapidly. 

Yuta wished he could forget it; the dream, the tattoo. He didn’t have the guts to read it and he tried to wash it away in the shower every night, but it never worked. He distracted himself by playing the tourist guide for Mark and Jaehyun, bringing them to breakfast and lunch and dinner or joining them for dinner and videogames at night. He brought them to play basketball after he learned that Jaehyun loved it even more than Mark and he found that, actually, whenever he was with them, that unnerving feeling of knowing that he had an unwanted tattoo on his body wasn’t that unnerving and, sometimes, he would even forget about it. 

It wasn’t the only reason he started spending more time with them of course. Yuta really liked having Mark around and it was like being back in college, back in Seoul. And Jaehyun too. It was like meeting not only one, but two long time friends and it was awesome how easily Jaehyun and he became friends and how great of a team the three of them made, so he would make sure that all the time they had together was a great time.

It was so easy being around both of them that on Wednesday, as they played video games at Mark’s and Jaehyun living room, he suddenly asked.

“Hey Mork.” Yuta said and Jaehyun chuckled beside him. “Did you finally get a tattoo?”

“You know I don’t like tattoos, man.” Mark’s answer somewhere behind him on the couch was enough answer, or at least the answer that Yuta needed. He knew that Mark, in fact, was too scared of needles to get himself a real tattoo, but he also knew that Mark wasn’t one of those people that dreamed about meeting their soulmate. If it happens, it happens. 

Yuta snorted. “I’m talking about your soulmate.” He also grinned when Jaehyun made a bad turn and Yuta’s car passed his. 

“Shit.” Jaheyun hissed, too focused on the game. 

“Do you have one, oppa?” Yuta asked again and chuckled along with Mark. Jaehyun was probably too focused on winning the game to pay any attention to their talking, as Yuta found out that Jaehyun was just as competitive as himself, on that same weekend that they met. 

“Oh, man!” Mark whined when someone else passed him, again, before he actually answered. “No- fuck. No soulmate for me yet. Nope... What about you?”

Jaehyun had passed him again and Yuta frowned. He wouldn’t let Jaehyun win again. 

“Pfft. You know I don’t believe in this kind of thing.”

“Oh.” Mark lost another position, but Jaehyun was still winning. “Yeah. Right, I remember now. ....Jaehyun hyung does.”

“What!?” The harsh sound of hot tires screeching on hot asphalt that came from the TV echoed in the room. Jaehyun did an awful turn and this time, not only Yuta, but other cars also passed him. 

“Do you?” Yuta almost lost a position as he quickly turned to watch Jaehyun, who frowned - not happy at all - at the TV screen. “Have a soulmate?” And then that feeling was back in the notch of his stomach that made his mouth dry.

It was the last lap and Jaehyun still frowned by his side, Yuta could see it as he leaned on his shoulder, just how he could feel how tense Jaehyun was. Maybe Jaehyun was even more competitive than himself and a few seconds, that lasted for almost a minute, lingered in complete silence between them, until the lap was finally over; for Yuta, first, then Jaehyun. 

“Fuck, dude. I was gonna win.” Jaehyun complained, but Yuta grinned, as they watched in silence Mark cross the final line, almost a full minute later. “I don’t have a soulmate.”

“But he wants one.” Mark added as he tossed the controller on the couch. 

“Really?” Yuta frowned, but Jaehyun shrugged. 

“Really.” 

“So you believe in soulmates?” 

Jaehyun turned to him and they were so close that Yuta had never seen it so clear, the way that Jaehyun’s eyes sparkled, a little more brown than usual as he watched Yuta as if he studied him, before he finally nodded.

“My parents are soulmates.” From this close, Yuta had perfectly seen the way that dimples formed in Jaehyun’s face when he pressed his lips in a thin line. “My grandparents too.”

“Oh…” That was… “Wow.” Unexpected. “Nice, I guess.”

That same night, when Yuta got out from a long, needed shower and he glanced at himself sideways in the mirror. He couldn’t see it. Not like that, so he took his phone and another picture.

It was blurred and his hair covered a good part of it, so he couldn’t read it. He wouldn’t dare read it, but it was there; the tattoo. A soulmate tattoo. 

Yuta didn’t know how to feel about it.

------jj------ 

Ten arrived the same Thursday that Jaehyun had lunch alone with Yuta. Shotaro was supposed to join them, while Mark would accompany Kai in some business meeting that Jaehyun’s presence wasn’t actually required - some tech stuff that was actually Mark’s business. 

It had been three weeks already, since the day they moved to Japan - only ten weeks left and, how many days, Jaehyun wasn’t sure anymore; he stopped counting them - and that uneasy feeling never really left him, but wasn’t so unnerving anymore; intriguing, yes, how he could feel so at ease and so taut at the same time.

Sometimes, or some days, it was easier, Jaehyun noticed. Like last weekend when Yuta took them for a full tourism session - that included waking up at 5a.m. on a Saturday to visit Tokyo’s famous fish market - or that same Tuesday where the three of them met in the park at night for a basketball game - Yuta promised them they wouldn’t leave Japan without a soccer match either - or like that lunch, alone with Yuta.

It was getting easier, overall, and that lunch had been incredibly easy. Talking to Yuta was easy, in fact, and within an one hour lunch break Jaehyun got to know a lot more about him than he managed with Taeyong, or even Johnny, when they first met. 

Within a quick meal, Jaehyun learned a lot of things he didn’t know yet, like that Yuta had a dog back in Osaka, or that it was the third time that year that Yuta changed his hair color - he was thinking about silver next and Jaehyun couldn’t help but smile at the thought.

“You’d look great.” He managed and Yuta smiled broadly. 

He learned that Yuta was into rock music and he promised he’d show Jaehyun some  of favorite japanese bands later - there would be a concert next month and if Jaehyun liked, they could go together - and he learned that him and Mark called each other oppa because Yuta was too bemused, back in college, by the whole “oppa” thing, and so was Mark, by Yuta unbaffled response to all those girls trying to act cute around him.

“Cute girls are not exactly my type.” Yuta told him that time and Jaehyun wasn’t sure how to take that information, so he just laughed - and tried not to think about the night they met at the nightclub, even though there wasn’t much to remember, except that Yuta was indeed nice from the start, and hot, but that was nothing to think about his coworker slash new friend. 

Yuta was indeed beautiful, there was no denying that. He had beautiful eyes and a beautiful smile, and Jaheyun had seen him in suits as well all swamp in sport clothes after their late night game to know that Yuta was really a beautiful person, but still, it was better to just leave it like that and definitely not think about the row of piercings in his ears. 

“Do you have any plans for the weekend?” Yuta asked as they walked their way back to the office building. “I was thinking that maybe we could go to Osaka on Saturday, but I haven’t checked with Mark yet.”

“This weekend?”

“Yes. This weekend.”

“Oh, I don’t know about Mark, but- ” Jaehyun chuckled as Yuta watched him and although Jaehyun was actually looking forward to their trip, he missed his friends back home. “One of our friends is coming over for the weekend and I promised I would show him around.”

“Oh.” Yuta nodded and Jaehyun wasn’t sure, but he thought that Yuta’s smile died a little. 

“He’s staying at our place.” Jaehyun quickly added.

“Maybe next weekend then?”

And there it was, that same baffling sting in his heart that haunted Jaehyun’s heart since Korea, but it didn’t last long this time when Yuta smiled back and openly at him.

“Yeah. Sure.” 

------ny------

Yuta wasn’t sure how he felt either when Jaehyun told him they couldn't make their trip that weekend. 

Maybe he was being selfish, but he thought that maybe a couple of days back into his home town, at home, would make his heart at ease again; would, maybe, make those dreams go away,

He wasn’t being completely selfish though; he talked about his home and his city to Mark for years now, since they met, and it had been only a few weeks that Mark was finally there in Japan, but he was really looking forward to bringing Jaehyun there too. 

Jaehyun and him had a similar taste, for a lot of different things and he just knew that Jaehyun would enjoy the street food as much as he liked it too. Mark would too, but Jaehyun wasn’t a picky eater, and Osaka had the best street food, there was no way he wouldn’t like it. There was so much they could do, it would be awesome if they could make it more than once, but Yuta really wanted it to happen, soon. 

Maybe he needed it, and all this soulmate thing was not that easy to ignore, but still, it was better if he didn’t know. 

--

Yuta had met Ten before, back in Seoul and so many years ago it was amazing to see how he still looked, and acted, the same. 

Ten was crazy. The good kind of crazy that Yuta actually appreciated and he hasn't changed a thing, from what Yuta could tell when they met again that Friday night at a bar in Shinjuku. He was in the city for a dance workshop that weekend, but arrived a day earlier so he would have time to walk around the city, and stay some more time with his friends. 

Yuta didn’t know that Ten and Jaehyun were close friends before that night, but the way they easily laughed at each other’s jokes and the way that Ten easily leaned onto Jaehyun, or touched him, it made it easy to see how close they actually were.

Ten did the same to Mark, Yuta kinda noticed that, but whenever he watched Ten holding onto Jaehyun’s arm, or Jaehyun’s arm around Ten’s shoulder, it made something twist inside Yuta and that feeling, Yuta knew that feeling. 

Ten was gorgeous, and so was Jaehyun; they made a gorgeous, hot, couple. But Yuta wasn’t sure if they were a couple or not. 

Jaehyun never mentioned a boyfriend before, neither a girlfriend, but judging by the way that Jaehyun stared at him that night in that nightclub - that stupid, hot, fuckboy smirk - Yuta felt safe to assume it could have been a boyfriend. 

Jaehyun wasn’t a fuckboy either, Yuta was pretty sure of that. He melted the heart of all the girls in their office, but it was just the way Jaehyun was: sweet, and kind, and caring, and hardworking, and gorgeous. 

Yuta’s heart jumped at the thought, and he shouldn’t be thinking that way, not at his friend. But it was hard not to, when Jaehyun smiled so openly and his shoulders shook at Ten’s joke and their table filled with Ten’s antics and Mark clapping hands and Jaehyun’s deep, loud laugh. Yuta chuckled, but not at Ten’s words, as he stared at the dimples in Jaehyun’s face and the way his eyes disappeared, how large he smiled, and the way leaned onto Ten, too, in their small shared booth. 

Yuta didn’t believe in soulmates, and why would he, when it meant it would take away from him the possibility of meeting someone like Jaehyun, or the whole lot of other people he met and that, some, actually turned into lovers. 

Jaehyun actually believed in soulmates, and Yuta remembered that night, when Jaehyun said he didn’t have one. When Jaehyun told him how he hoped he could meet his soulmate one day, just like his parents did, and Johnny - Yuta didn’t know that about Johnny. 

So maybe Jaehyun and Ten were nothing but friends and before he noticed, Yuta had also laughed, loud and clear along with them. 

------jj------

Jaehyun thought that having one of his friends from home at his new, temporary home would maybe help calm down his heart a bit. It would probably have been that way if it was Johnny, or Taeil, but it was Ten he was talking about - and as much as he loved his friend, he should have known better - he just should have known better. 

Jaehyun and Ten met still back in highschool. Ten was the new foreign kid in school and Jaehyun was the only one who had lived abroad so, even though Ten was his senior, Jaehyun helped him through his homework and Korean classes. Ten was also the only openly gay kid in school, while Jaehyun couldn’t quite define himself as straight - “hetero”, or “allocishet”, as Ten used to say - either. Jaehyun believed in soulmates, and souls didn’t have a gender, as they were once part of stars; celestials things that couldn’t care less about what humanity once decided to call “gender”, and Ten was the only person he ever met that also thought about it the same way - even when he said didn’t care about his soulmate anymore.

Jaehyun knew Ten better than that, and in fact, Ten also used to wake up with this unneasing feeling ever since he found his tattoo on his chest. He tried to deny it and buried himself even more into his dancing after that and it was probably just a coping mechanism - dancing was his passion, no one could deny that, though -  and as long as it made him happy, Jaehyun would more than gladly indulge him. Besides, it wasn’t like it was actually easy to find his Chinese soulmate that possibly only crossed his path once in a busy chinese airport, where Ten had never been to ever again. 

Just the same, Ten was the only one of his friends that would actually listen to Jaehyun’s thoughts and dreams and actual love life - as in the romantical part of it, not just the love life people knew about every time Jaehyun dated someone new. Jaehyun believed in soulmates and everyday he wished he could find that person, one day; but until that day happened, Jaehyun would move on with his life and “live a little” - as Johnny used to say - or  “live a lot” - in Taeyong words.  

But it was Ten who jumped on Jaehyun’s bed with the most annoying, knowing smirk Ten could put, after a drinking night with Yuta and Mark. 

Jaehyun didn’t know that Yuta had met Ten before, back in Seoul. And it was nice that both of them seemed to get along just fine. And it wasn’t like he hadn’t noticed the way Yuta stared at Ten, because he did. What he didn’t want to notice was the way his heart beat with that same uneasiness that followed him through his short stay in Japan - just a little bit more awkward. No, that one he would rather not notice.

They were ready to sleep and although it was Friday, Ten had to wake up early for his dance workshop the next morning, but there they were, laying side by side as Ten stared at him like that and Jaehyun just should have known better, like he knew that no good was about to come.

“What?" If Ten had something - probably devious to say - it was better to hear it sooner than later.

“Looks like you and Yuta are real close, huh?” 

“He’s a nice friend. Nice senior.”Jaehuin shrugged. “He’s helping us a lot.”

“Nice friend, nice senior...” The snarky tone in Ten’s voice was even more annoying than the grin in the corner of his mouth. “Hot guy who couldn’t keep his eyes from us the whole night, but oh, what a nice senior Yuta is.”

“What?” Jaehyun frowned. “Ten, if you’re into him you can just go for it, okay? I’m- I’m not sure, but I think he isn’t het, so just go for it and let me sleep.” Seriously, he should have known better. “I should have made you sleep in Mark’s room.” He mumbled as he turned around with his back towards Ten and pulled the sheet up to his shoulders.

“Mark talks in his sleep.”

“I snore.”

“Old guy’s problem, but don't freak me out as Mark’s zombie mode.”

“I’m younger than you-”

“Only old guys snore.” Ten cut him.

“And Mark-” Jaehyun frowned and turned his face slightly as he pondered, and a quick snort followed in. “Yeah, okay. Mark’s creepy when he sleep-talk. Should have made you sleep on the couch.”

“Hey! I might be shorter than you, but that couch is so small you couldn’t fit a baby to sleep on it.” 

Jaehyun finally chuckled, but didn’t fully turn towards Ten as he watched his friend cross his arms with the corner of his eyes. 

“Besides,” Ten quickly added and that annoying smirk was back. “As hot as Yuta is, I don’t think it’s me he’s interested in.” 

Jaehyun froze, but not his heart, and in that moment it beat harder than usual. 

“Do you think he’s interested in Mark?”

“Oh my god, you’re so dense.” Ten groaned behind him before he pulled Jaehyun’s arm and Jaehyun then laid on his back as he wouldn’t dare look at Ten in that moment. “It was like me and Mark were third wheeling for you.”

“No, it wasn’t.”

“Yes, it was.”

Jaehyun frowned as he quickly turned his face to stare - more like glare, - at Ten. “It wasn’t. It’s your fault you made Mark take my seat when I went to the bathroom.”

“I was talking before that.”

“What do you even mean?”

“Tell me you’re not interested.” Ten could be really annoying when he wanted to. Even more with that growing smirk in his face as Jaehyun couldn’t place the words in his tongue.

Jaehyun turned to face the ceiling instead and tried to ignore the chuckles beside him. 

“It’s- It’s not like that.” Jaehyun said in a low voice, but Ten’s laugh grew louder. “It’s.. He's hot. I know that. And… Nice. A nice person, not just a nice hyung.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. And he’s cool to be with and-” Jaehyun chuckled. “We’ve been hanging out a lot. Us- I mean not Yuta, Mark and me. Just… the two of us.”

“Uh-hum.” Ten indulged beside him and Jaehyun felt the small bed shifting under Ten’s weight as he moved, but he wouldn’t look at his friend. Not yet. Not with his heart pounding like that. 

“I feel like-... I can talk to him a lot. Like,” But Jaehyun turned to Ten anyway and his friend was staring at him with big eyes and that same grin. It was infuriating, but Jaheyun didn’t mind it this time. “We have a lot of things in common and he’s… fun to be with.”

Ten pushed him to his nerves sometimes - a lot of times, actually - but there was a reason why Ten was one of his best friends and his long time confident friend; and that reason was reflected in the way that Ten’s annoying knowing smirk turned into a fond, understanding one. 

“...But?”

“We work together now.” Jaehyun said, but Ten raised a very annoued eyebrow at him and it wasn’t only Jaehyun that knew Ten better; Ten knew Jaehyun better too. “And we live in different countries”

“You’re living in the same country for the next couple of months.”

“But then I’ll move back.”

“It’s a two hour long flight.”

“Plus transfer to and from airports, it’s a five hour long trip.”

“Jaehyunnie.” Ten frowned and yeah, Ten definitely knew him better - Jaehyun knew that. “What’s the real deal?”

It was like Jaehyun’s heart would tear his skin and bones and just jump out of his chest how hard it beat and his mouth ran dry and Jaheyun knew that scrutinizing look in Ten’s eyes. It was judgement; he just knew him too well. 

“....He isn't my soulmate.” Jaehyun turned to face the ceiling, before he turned his back to Ten once again. “It’s not worth the trouble. Now good night, Ten.”

Jaehyun barely slept that night.

--

They all postponed their trip to Osaka, Yuta’s hometown, for the next month and while Ten spent the whole day at the dance workshop, Mark left to go shopping with Yuta and Shotaro in the afternoon.

“Are you sure you don’t wanna come with us?” Yuta asked from the doorway of their living room - Mark and their young trainee were already waiting outside. 

Jaehyun had woken up to his heart beating even more unsteady than it was before and when he mentioned that to Ten - who actually noticed there was something wrong with him before he even said anything about it - his friend told him he used to wake up like that every now and them, but happened more often in the first half of the month, every month, ever since he gained his tattoo. He had no idea why, though.

“Yeah. I have some work to do for the guys.” He pointed at the laptop on his lap and it wasn’t a complete lie, but he could really use some time alone this time. 

Yuta's eyes still lingered on him, though, before his lips turned into a tight, but reassuring smile; it was full and bright with teeth and all that usual Yuta’s positive energy back. “We’ll bring you something to eat. Don’t overwork yourself.”

--

Yuta and Mark, and Shotaro, did bring Jaehyun dinner. Jaehyun, and Ten, of course, and they all ate together at their small living room over bottles of beer and Mark’s loud voice and Ten’s complaints because he was even worse than Mark at video games, while Shotaro was another great competitor - or “another competitive ass”, like Jaehyun and Yuta were. 

It was nice and fun and it’s been a while since Jaehyun had such a great time. It would only have been better if Johnny and Winwin and Taeyong were there, but it was great nonetheless. 

Shotaro had left earlier than Yuta, since the metro station close to his home closed earlier, and sometime in the middle of their game night - Jaehyun hadn't noticed when - Ten and Mark quit (or more like gave up) so they could chat a little. Jaehyun, and some times Yuta too, engaged in their conversation, but some time later both Mark and Ten left and when Jaehyun actually noticed, it was just him and Yuta and they were laughing their asses off at something probably not even that funny that Jaehyun (or was it Yuta who started it?) said. 

Yuta had his bright smile as he laid his back on the floor and his legs were halfway onto Jaehyun’s lap when Jaehyun’s heart came to act on his own again, beating like it was still in the middle of the race, where Yuta, Jaehyun and another car fought for the first place like their lives depended on it, around a minute or so ago, only it beat slightly different; in a way Jaehyun didn’t want to describe. 

“I’ll take revenge. Next week. “ Yuta chuckled as he took his legs from Jaehyun’s lap and sat up straight. “It’s late.”

“Well see about that.” They both chuckled and Jaehyun’s heart wasn’t so uneasy anymore. “We’re taking Ten to Harajuku tomorrow night. Do you want to go with us?”

“Seriously?” Yuta still smiled as his eyebrow curved up his front before he was laughing out loud again. “ That’s too much, even for me.  But go on, have fun.” He said as he stood up. “I’m sure you also want to spend some time on your own.”

Jaehyun’s heart beat again after that. 

He actually wanted Yuta to join them.

But he shouldn’t want things like that. 

------ny------

Yuta didn’t even bother with shower, or clothes, or whatever was the thing that piled up on his desk as he tossed himself, head first, onto his bed that night. His heart burned, like his neck, but it was probably just his imagination, some psychological thing, as he thought about the tattoo on his nape. About Jaehyun’s nape that time he leaned his head on Yuta’s knee as they played games on Jaehyun and Mark’s living room soon after Shotaro left them. 

It took him a willpower he didn’t even know he had not to touch the skin on Jaehyun’s nape and his hair and he wasn’t sure if all he wanted was just it: to touch him, or if he actually expected to find something there. Something like a tattoo.

Yuta still hasn't looked at his own tattoo properly yet, and he wore his hair down everyday now, so no one else would notice it either. It was pointless looking anyway, like it was pointless nourishing whatever it was that made him think about Jaehyun at every little thing he saw when he spent the day with other friends, but he was sure that Jaehyun would have enjoyed the cafe and the new arcade they’d been to. Or whenever he thought that Jaehyun would make the silliest joke about the silliest things along with him. Or how much Jaheyun would probably like the view, or the food, or the music. No. It was absolutely useless, like the tattoo on his nape. 

------jj------

Jaehyun’s heart was more at ease that Sunday, as he and Mark busied themselves with very necessary house stuff that included cleaning and shopping, and then more cleaning, and more shopping. They blamed it on Ten, because they didn’t think they needed so much stuff until Ten complained that they didn’t have any extra towels, or extra cups, or separate laundry baskets. Anyway, it wouldn’t hurt and Johnny did mention he’d stay with them when he came by in a few weeks, so they probably needed a futon too - sharing a bed with (thin and short) Ten was a lot easier than with (broad and tall) Johnny, so yeah, a futon would make it. 

They met Ten sometime later in the evening after Ten’s class so they could walk around Harajuku and later that night it was even better when Winwin video called them.

Until Winwin asked if Jaehyun had decided who’d be his company for the wedding.

“Can’t I decide when I come back?” Jaehyun groaned from his side of the couch where Ten squished himself between him and Mark as he held the ipad with Winwin’s face for them. 

“Dude,” Mark’s head sneaked behind Ten’s head. “We’ll get there two weeks before the wedding.”

“I can meet someone in two weeks.” He shuddered.

“And bring a stranger to your friend’s wedding?” Ten frowned and turned from him to the ipad with his affronted-Ten face. “Winwin, I vote for you to revoke Jaehyun as your best man.”

“You’re only saying that 'cause you wanted to be his best man.” Mark simply said and the three of them, minus Ten, laughed. 

“I am not!” 

“Yes, you are.” They all said in unison, but Jaehyun added. “I met him before any of you and we’re the same age. Stop being bitter.”

Ten scoffed, and rolled his eyes, and before he would say something, Winwin also said: “You haven’t told me who you’re gonna bring either, Ten, so if you two don’t decide it until the photo session next week, I’m gonna pair you up with whoever I want and you two are gonna have to live with that. You too, Lee Mark.” He added when Mark started laughing, but that made him stop and cough. Embarrassed Mark was always enough to make Jaehyun smile, but the beat in Jaehyun’s heart, once again, lost its rhythm inside his chest. 

And it didn’t find its pace again that night.

It got probably worse when he laid in bed - Ten once again by his side although they’d bought the futon earlier. 

“Maybe you could invite Yuta.” Ten voices out of nowhere as they both scrolled through their phones. 

The fact that Jaehyun was actually talking to Yuta about that place he saw around Daikanyama and that they were actually planning on going there together wasn’t something he’d tell Ten - not for now - but it was probably because of his heart uneasiness this time. 

“Invite Yuta where?” He asked, as unsure as the beat inside his chest.

“To Winwin’s wedding. I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t oppose that.”

“Yuta?”

“Winwin.” Ten grinned. “ But I doubt that Yuta wouldn’t like to be your plus one.” 

“I hate you.” Jaheyun groaned and rolled his eyes as Ten rolled in bed to face him once again. 

“No you don’t.” 

--

Ten would only leave on Tuesday, since flights fare were cheaper on weekdays, so when Jaehyun and Mark got back from work that Monday it was to find Ten surrounded by japanese magazines on their living room floor. 

“Winwin called.” He started like that. “His other bestie from China is coming-” Ten frowned. “Going… Going to his pre-wedding photoshoot next weekend and I convinced him to give us more time before his fiance pairs us with any of her girlfriends, so we’re actually shooting this together.”

Jaehyun and Mark exchanged a few glances before Jaehyun finally found the courage to take off his coat and his shoes instead of running away from his own place - well, not really. “Together as in… You and Me?”

“Together as in my gay ass with your queer ass. Unless you want to invite Y-”

“Alright!” Jaehyun quickly cut him, or as fast as he could and approached Ten on the floor. “Fine! Whatever. Right. We’ll do it together.” 

Mark snorted somewhere behind him. 

“I’m gonna order us some pizza.” Mark said, but Jaehyun was sure he heard something about calling Johnny and a thank god it wasn't him, or something along those lines as Mark made his way towards his bedroom. 

Jaehyun should have definitely known better that the uneasiness in his heart would never settle down with Ten’s visit. 

It was Ten the person he would openly talk about it - he tried it with Johnny or Winwin, every once in a while, but they didn’t understand. Not the same way that Ten did and that was probably the reason it was also so unnerving. 

A couple of hours later Jaehyun though that Ten had already gave him the quasi heart attack of the night - the one he almost had when Ten almost said Yuta’s same as the person that Jaehyun should invite to Winwin’s wedding in front of Mark - but nothing compared to the look in Ten’s face as he started at Jaehyun’s head with his hand covering his mouth. 

He should have known it was a bad idea when he stupidly agreed to Ten’s (stupid) idea of getting Jaheyun a new haircut for the photo session. 

“Come on Ten, what’s wrong? What did you do?” He groaned as he asked for the third - fourth? -  time as Ten simply stared at the side of his head, where less than two minutes ago, Ten started working with the razor. Jaehyun had mentioned he wanted to get a samurai haircut, or maybe just a side cut with a man bun, but allowing Ten to do that was probably a bad idea. “Let me see it.”

“No!” Ten pulled him back to sit down at the toilet lid and the buzz sound of the razor still echoed in the small bathroom for a while, before Ten finally turned it off and placed it on the counter, his eyes never leaving Jaehyun. “I swear I didn’t fuck up but, honey,” Ten smiled sweetly and it was just as terrifying as Ten’s terrified face to the side of his head. “I think you should sit down before you see it.” 

--

If Jaehyun felt anxious, as Johnny said, before moving to Japan, he felt it three times worse  and his heart beat three times faster to an indescribable rhythm as he stared at the picture Ten took from his head; his hair. His soulmate tattoo. It all made sense at the moment - why he felt like that, that was. All those feelings and crazy dreams and that awkward feeling was because, in fact, Jaehyun had already met his soulmate.

Only he didn’t know where.

Only he didn’t know who.

Only he had no idea what the tattoo said. 

Jaehyun didn’t sleep that night and after a few minutes of despair because how would he walk around with a tattoo on his head, that he had no idea about what it said because it was all written in japanese, into the office of their Japanese partners, in Japan? How the fuck would he even walk around in Japan with a japanese tattoo that he didn’t understand? Or worse! How would he appear on one of his best friend’s wedding with a tattoo on his skull, all because he allowed Ten into getting him a sidecut because he said - and Jaehyun quoted - that he (Ten) “would look hotter in the pictures beside a hot guy with a sidecut in suits”. 

And at the moment, Jaehyun felt a strange feeling in his stomach when he thought about how he would show up in front of Yuta with a sudden soulmate tattoo on his head. 

------ny------

It was already noon when Yuta passed by Jaehyun’s empty desk beside Mark’s at their office. They were supposed to have lunch together, the three of them, just as usual, but not only Jaehyun wasn’t there, as there was no sign of his presence whatsoever. No phone, no charger, no laptop, no pens tossed around the white desk with draft papers all around; not even the usual tall cup of iced americano - that around this time of the day was half full of ice only, that Jaehyun refilled from their shared kitchen. 

“Hey, Mark.” Yuta called, leaning on the empty desk. “Where’s Jaehyun?”

“Oh!” Mark still stared at his computer screen and typed on the keyboard. “Oh…” He paused and the sound of the fast tapping of his fingers on the laptop that filled the silence only served to make Yuta even more curious.

“Mark?” He insisted, curving up his eyebrows.

“Oh yeah, right. Sorry.” Mark still typed something even faster, before he finally turned towards Yuta with a smile that looked more like a grimace. “Uhm… Jaehyun hyung! right! He’s, uhm, a little bit sick. He wasn’t really feeling good this morning so…  He’s working from home.”

If there was one thing that Mark was awful at - and by awful Yuta meant painfully, terribly disastrous - that thing was telling lies. Yuta learned that when they studied together and things never changed. Maybe it was one of the reasons why Yuta and Mark got along so well: Yuta hated lies as much as he loved teasing Mark and his other friends, but when it came to serious stuff, there was no place for lying in his friendships. 

“Mark,” Yuta frowned slightly, pressing the corner of his lips as he crossed his arms in front of his chest. “Cut the crap.”

“It’s true!” Mark insisted. “He-”

The unique sound of Kai’s laugh roared right behind Mark and when they glanced, the director was laughing so hard at something on his phone that he almost fell from his chair.

“Is this real?” Kai spoke in Korean from the desk behind Mark’s and that’s when Yuta noticed the airpod on the man’s ear. “I think you’re right, pretty. That’s exactly what it says. Poor thing…” Kai giggled as he turned around on his chair towards both of them. “Hey, I’ll call you when I get home." 

Yuta and Mark shared a quick glance between each other before Kai pulled his chair closer to them as he giggled, still staring back at the screen of his phone. 

“What’s so funny, hyung?” 

Mark asked with curious eyes and Kai quickly typed on his phone before it disappeared on his back pocket, but he seemed a little hesitant as he spoke.

“I saw a soulmate tattoo…” He sighed, betrayed by the amused grin on his face. “I shouldn’t be laughing. No one should, but someone…” 

Kai didn’t finish his story as he still shook his head when Mark interrupted with a cough.

“Are you guys hungry?” Mark said instead. “Cause I’m starving. Do you wanna join us, hyung?”

--

Yuta didn’t ask again about Jaehyun, nor Mark said anything else, but Yuta quickly texted him on their way to a restaurant a few blocks across the street and it didn’t take long for Jaehyun to reply.

Yuta: 

Hey. is everything alright?

Didn’t see you around today and Mark said you’re sick

Jaehyun: 

Hey. :) 

it’s just a headache. 

Don’t worry

Yuta: 

Do you need anything?

I could stop by and bring you lunch

Jaehyun: 

It’s okay. I’m fine.

<image attached> pizza time! >)

Thanks anyway :)

Yuta:

Pizza is not real food

Jaehyun:

Says the guy who has his fridge full of beer and lives on ramen

Yuta:

:P

Beer is actually good for your brain and may lower your cholesterol levels, unlike pizza

Ramen is quintessentially japanese salarymen experience. I live up to my roots

Jaehyun:

LOL

Pizza is worldwide known comfort food

Yuta: 

Says who?

That’s because you haven’t tasted my cooking skills yet

 ;)

Once you have it you'll never want anything else

Jaehyun: 

Do you even know how to cook?

Yuta:

Insults!

Of course I do! 

“Hey, Yuta. Yuta.”

Jaehyun: 

Instant ramen doesn’t count as cooking

;) 

“Oppa!”

“Oh my god, Mark!” Yuta quickly turned around when Mark’s calling startled him. It was his turn in line and while Mark glared at him, Kai had a mischievous grin tugging on his face as he waited for Yuta to order first. 

No one mentioned the soulmate tattoo topic through their lunch either, but somehow it was harder to ignore the slight warmth that insisted on heating around Yuta’s nape. 

It was only his imagination, he decided that days ago, but sometimes it was almost impossible to ignore the feeling. Like it suddenly did last night. Or when he woke up sweating from the same dream about a somewhat dark room with bright and crazy flashes of lights. Like it bothered him the whole morning and he swore he was actually sweating when they left the building for lunch, after noticing Jaehyun’s absence; after Kai brought up the soulmate tattoo thing.

He felt more at ease just a little bit earlier, but he was probably just distracted as he texted Jaehyun. But just to think about it made it burn again. 

“Hyung,” Yuta called Kai between sips on his soda. “Do you believe in soulmates?”

Kai's face brightened up at the question and a small, but fond smile took place on his mouth. “Of course.” He nodded, “Don’t you?”

“Nah… No, not really.” Yuta shuddered and shook his head, and he glanced at his almost empty plate, and took another sip of his drink. “Nope.”

Kai chuckled in front of them while Mark watched Kai with ever so curious eyes. “Do you have a soulmate, hyung?” he asked.

“I do.” 

Kai smiled even wider, but quickly lowered his head and it took him a while before he pulled up the sleeves of his long sleeved shirt. 

At his left arm, a delicate and perfectly shaped hand writing formed a korean phrase on the inner side of his forearm. I think you're the only one of mine, it said, while a single sunflower matched the phrase’s place and colored his toned skin on his right arm.

“They match.” Kai didn’t have to say it, and the proud, soft smile on his face also spokes volumes. He didn’t have to but he wanted, and he meant it, anyone could see that. 

A fluttering feeling started in Yuta’s stomach and the warmth that formed in the base of his neck was impossible to ignore. He brushed it with his finger, pressing on his nape and his heart beat faster, but tighter, smaller, as the thought of Jaehyun filled every empty space in his head.

Yeah, Yuta didn’t believe in soulmates. 

------jj------

“Are you really sure that’s what they said?” Jaehyun groaned as he talked to Ten over the phone and he would bury his head inside his pillow if he could, but that wouldn’t be exactly helpful.

“I’m sorry, honey. I showed it to Taemin twice and his boyfriend also confirmed, and he’s been living in Japan for years.” Ten sighed as Jaehyun groaned once more and maybe burying his head inside his pillow would actually help - at least until his hair grew longer again. “Now tell me…” And it was exactly the mellow in Ten’s voice that made Jaehyun frown. “Who’s the person you hit on at all those fancy Japanese parties?”

“I didn’t hit on anyone!” Jaehyun complained. “I’m not even going to parties. I have no idea who it is and I don’t think I even want to.”

“Of course you want to! It’s your soulmate, silly. You’ve been searching for them for years and now that you have one, you don’t wanna meet them?”

“You don’t wanna meet yours either.”

“That’s different.” 

Ten stated, but Jaehyun didn’t buy that.

“How come is that different? You don’t even know what your tattoo says.”

“Because it’s in Chinese and my soulmate is my work.”

“Well, mine is in Japanese and it says I’m a fucking fuckboy.” Jaehyun snapped. “Why would I even want to meet my soulmate if they're so full of themselves to think I was hitting on them while I wasn’t?”

Jaehyun was only seven - or maybe less - when his grandmother first told him about soulmates. He still remembered clearly the sweet words in the back of his grandma's hands, matching the ones his grandpa proudly showed him, around his left ankle. His parents’ had them on their chest - his mom on the right, while his father had it on the left - and while most people believed that tattoos showed up where your soulmate first noticed you, Jaehyun’s grandmother told him it was none of that. They show up where they’re supposed to, that’s what she always said - where the stars think they belong. “It’s all written in the stars.”

Maybe his grandma was right and Jaehyun’s tattoo showed up in his scalp, hidden by hair (where it should remain) and out of everyone’s sight; out of Jaehyun’s sight. Maybe, Jaehyun was never supposed to find his soulmate, afterall. Maybe, that’s why he felt so relentless about going to Japan - and maybe that meant that, in fact, he wasn’t even supposed to go there. To be there, and meet a soulmate that didn’t want him, that didn’t like him, not at all, and… what a brat! Jaehyun didn’t even make any move on anyone ever since he stepped in Japan..

Not another fuckboi hitting on me,
I've had enough tonight.

He still couldn’t believe that those were the words that would linger forever with him on his skin. 

--

Jaehyun woke up that wednesday with a headache - it wasn’t all lies when he told Yuta the previous day he only had a headache because he did - that lasted all day, and although talking to Yuta around lunch time helped him forget about it a little, it came back full force once Ten called him, already back in Korea and with a doubled check translation of his soulmate tattoo. 

He felt better when he didn’t know what it said. 

He considered skipping work again - working home, that was, since walking around in Tokyo with a tattoo that called himself a fuckboy, written in japanese, didn’t sound like a pleasing adventure; and walking inside the japanese headquarters of their japanese new partners seemed like a real nightmare. 

Ten and Mark suggested him wearing a beanie for a while, at least while they were in Japan and until his hair grew a little - and he never cursed Ten like he did last night after his shower. He should have never agreed on letting Ten give him a new haircut, especially a side cut, especially right before Winwin’s pre-wedding photos. 

Winwin would probably kill them - both of them - for ruining his wedding album, but all he could think about that morning - at least all his brain allowed him to think of, despite his cursed migraine - was what Yuta would think about that. 

Jaehyun actually chuckled, as Yuta would probably have the time of his life laughing at Jaehyun’s tattoo and how he would probably say that that’s one of the reasons he didn’t believe in soulmates, but as Jaehyun’s chest beat like the throbbing ache inside his head, the last thing that Jaehyun wanted was for Yuta (or anyone else) to see that. 

What Jaehyun really wanted was to forget about that; all that. About soulmates, and tattoos, and expectations as reality seemed too cruel. Maybe he should live like Ten and his soulmate could be his work - only he didn’t love his work as much as Ten loved to dance - or something else entirely. He could always find himself a new hobby, right? 

But until that, maybe Jaehyun could just avoid leaving home for a while - at least while he was in Japan, where people could read the curse on his head. 

------ny------

Jaehyun didn’t show up at work on Wednesday, and neither on Thursday. According to Mark, he was doing some work for their Korean startup, something urgent, but Mark was a terrible liar and even if he wasn't, it was the way that Jaehyun barely replied to any of the messages that told him that something was going wrong. 

Yuta already knew that Jaehyun would be gone for the weekend - something about being the best man for a friend's wedding or something - and he would leave by Friday night, as Jaehyun, or maybe Ten, let slip during the weekend. Whatever it was, Yuta would miss him. 

In fact, he already did as he got used to having Jaehyun around, like he missed Mark before and would for sure miss his friend again when he left. They would only stay for another month and a half, from what Yuta heard, but not having one of them around made Yuta realize how much he would actually miss them, both Mark and Jaehyun, when they moved back to Korea. This, and the fact that it wasn’t just just the rushed beating inside his chest that he woke up to these days after the same dream about bright lights inside a dark place, but that longing feeling and a not long ago memory of Jaehyun’s dimples as he smiled. 

When Jaehyun didn’t show up at work again on Friday, that was when Yuta really started to worry. 

And if Mark was such a bad liar, all it took was Yuta to make him the right question.

“Ok, dude, but you can’t tell him I told you about that, alright?” Mark rushed through his word, his eyes round and big as he stared at Yuta with his panicked face. “Jaehyun is gonna kill me!” 

Yuta smirked and he couldn’t quite believe that all that was about some fucked up soulmate tattoo. 

“Don’t worry, Markie.” He nodded as he placed his hand on Mark’s shoulder. “Your secret is safe with me.”

“Dude,”

“I’m just gonna try to cheer him up a little.” Yuta shrugged before he jumped down from the place he was seated on, Mark’s desk. 

“Oh man…” 

Yuta snorted as he heard Mark complain behind his back, but what he really wanted to push back was that awkward feeling on his chest. 

------jj------

Finding an excuse to work from home had been sort of easy, and not really an empty excuse.

Jungwoo got them a new contract with another company so now Resonance wasn’t the only partner they had to work on and they should probably hire some other people - which was awesome, considering Neo Zone was in fact just a start-up - and while they didn’t have those other people, they would all have to work twice as hard - and Jaehyun had the (perfect) excuse to work from home for a few days. 

That, and the fact that Ten told Johnny about his tattoo - cause of course Ten would - and despite making a joke about it every time Jaehyun talked on the phone with him, Johnny took mercy on his soul and helped him by exchanging with Jaehyun a few tasks they could do remotely. Johnny also told him he was being silly - “childish” was Jungwoo’s word choice - and maybe he was and he could have just wore a beanie, but the truth was: Jaehyun simply didn’t want to face anyone at the moment, not with that ache on his head and inside his chest and the unsettling feeling that, instead of feeling better after finding out that he indeed had a soulmate, finding his tattoo only made it even worse.

At least he would be gone for a few days; he would go back home, where he belonged and far from his supposed soulmate - and what a difference would it make if his soulmate didn’t want anything from him? - or from people who could read, that would know, exactly what his soulmate thought about him. At least in Seoul it wouldn’t be as clear and, maybe, Jaehyun could forget about it, even before his hair would grow again. 

He had almost everything ready since Thursday night - it wasn’t like he could really sleep anyway - so his backpack was ready and, consciously, it had a little more than what he would need for a weekend. He worked all morning in their new contract, instead of the one with Resonance, since Johnny was in charge of that task for now, and all he had to do was wait for lunch, their weekly online meeting with Johnny, Mark and Kai, and then he was ready to leave. 

Actually, Jaehyun hadn't even bothered to think about lunch - he could just eat whatever leftover he and Mark had in their fridge - so the last thing we expected was the intercom buzzing inside their kitchen and a voice that sounded very much like Yuta’s announcing his food delivery coming from it.

Jaehyun frowned. “Yuta?”

“No. Evil Queen. I brought you apples, now let me in, Snow White. You hid long enough.”

A breathed laugh left Jaehyun’s mouth before he actually allowed Yuta inside the building and out of the things Jaehyun expected to happen that day, Yuta showing up during his lunch break was definitely not on the list. 

It wasn’t like it was a bad surprise; it was just that Jaehyun hadn't really talked to Yuta these days for no other reason then that he didn’t want to talk to anyone else - although if Jaehyun was honest to himself, it was actually a nice surprise, one that almost made him forget about his hair and what wasn’t hidden by it anymore. 

“Shit.” He cursed under his breath when he couldn’t remember where the hell he had left his beanie and a few seconds later, there was a knock on his door. “Fuck.” Jaehyun cursed louder and even more frustrated, so he grabbed the first cap he found inside his bedroom and rushed towards the door as he put it on backwards. 

“Did you just call me a Disney princess?” 

He said as soon as he opened the door, but Yuta simply shrugged. “You’re hiding and I brought you food.” 

Jaehyun didn’t know what was so funny about that, but something about it was, or he wouldn’t have laughed as hard a second later, neither would have kept laughing as Yuta made himself at home as he tossed his shoes by the door and went straight to the kitchen.

Or maybe it wasn’t funny at all and Jaehyun was just tired of sleepless nights and mourning over this asshole of a soulmate. Having Yuta there was (definitely) a nice change in his lame week.

------ny------

When Yuta told Jaehyun that he knew how to make a perfect ramen, it wasn’t exactly a lie. It was only a matter of being in the right place and having the right weapons, and by that he meant his kitchen; not the lacking of cooking utensils in Jaehyun and Mark’s kitchen (not that Yuta knew how to use many, anyway) and the fact that he usually knew where to find all the ingredients (the few ones he usually bought for that exact purpose of cooking ramen, Osaka style). Yuta couldn’t find anything in that kitchen, and having Jaehyun watching him carefully as the guy leaned on the counter while Yuta tried to cook them lunch wasn’t exactly helpful.

“Are you sure you know what you are doing?” Jaehyun kept asking.

“I’m a chef.” Yuta kept answering.

“You can let me help.”

“Sit and wait.” 

But in the end Jaehyun did help and by the time the ramen was finally ready and they grabbed their plates to eat in the living room; the kitchen looked like a total mess.

“Dude, you definitely don’t know how to cook.” Jaehyun laughed out loud as he walked out the kitchen. 

“You haven’t even tried it yet.” 

“You’re so gonna clean up this mess.”

And it sure wasn’t a complete lie, much to Yuta’s surprise, when Jaehyun actually hummed when he tried it. 

“I told you.” Yuta didn’t even try to hide his boldness. “Perfect.”

But Jaehyun laughed again and tried to cover his mouth with the back of his hand. 

“For it to be perfect it should have at least a little bit of salt, but it’s good.” He chuckled, mouth still full and Yuta rolled his eyes. “At least it’s not instant ramen. I gotta give you some credit.”

“What? You’re talking nonsense. I put salt on it.” Yuta should have at least tried it before he spoke, cause when he did,it was also when he remembered that he actually didn’t remember if he had put salt on it. He frowned. “I did.” But he would never admit that. “Maybe you can’t taste because you’re so sick you couldn't even show up at work for a week?” 

It was Jaehyun who rolled his eyes this time, but still chuckled. “I’m not sick.” 

Yuta smirked, as it would actually be easier than he thought, but he didn’t say anything as he watched Jaehyun and waited. 

“Not really. I mean- I had a migraine all week, but I’m not that sick. I can still taste it and there’s no way you put salt in this.” 

This time it was Yuta the one who laughed longer than he probably should as Jaehyun stood up and disappeared into the kitchen. When he returned, with a small pot of salt in hand, Yuta wasn’t laughing any more, but he couldn’t help the smile in his face, and it didn’t stop as they shared lunch together for the first, and last time that week. 

He missed Jaehyun, just like he missed Mark before, and would happen again, eventually, but for now, it was nice being there; just there. having lunch with Jaehyun as they talked about their project, and Jaehyun told him about the new contract; as Jaehyun almost rolled on the floor of the small living room when Yuta told him about the the new his neighbor that talked ghosts; as he almost gagged on his food when Jaehyun told him about that one time he and Johnny got kicked out from pizza parlor that had a special all-you-eat buffet; as they simply talked about the new fifa release, or how they would go to Meguro and that new arcade Yuta mentioned before, once Jaehyun returned from Korea and how Mark still talked on his sleep.  

“Are you feeling better?” Yuta finally asked once they finished their food, both leaning against the couch, just how they used to most of the nights where Yuta was at the apartment. “The migraine.”

“Yeah.” Jaehyun smiled back at him, and Yuta's smile grew a little wider.

“Are you sure you weren’t just starving yourself for the whole week?”

Jaehyun chuckled, but lowered his eyes and Yuta noticed how his smile also weakened a little but. When Yuta interrogated Mark earlier and Mark let it slip about how Jaehyun had found his soulmate tattoo, but instead of beaming, Jaehyun was so disappointed because it was kinda mean, as Mark said, that he had been hiding himself in his room the whole week.

Yuta wasn’t sure how to take that information. He didn’t even know how he took it, as his heart beat the same offbeat way it did every morning since he found his own tattoo, but something weird twisted inside his stomach, at the same time… all he wanted was to see Jaehyun. 

Okay, if he had to be really, absolutely honest, he would miss Jaehyun a little bit more than he would miss Mark now, which was probably mean since he knew Mark was his dear friend for years, while he only met Jaehyun about a month or so ago. But he couldn’t help it; he missed Jaehyun during the whole week already.

“Yeah…” Jaehyun muttered, but it took him a little longer to stare back at Yuta and when he did, all Yuta could do was swallow down the shakiness in the pit of his stomach. “You didn’t have to come all the way to make me lunch, but… Thanks.”

“Of course.” Yuta nodded once, pressing his lips in a tight smile that, maybe, just baby, also worked for him to keep his mouth shut and not ask questions he wasn’t sure anymore he wanted to know the answer. “When do you leave?” He asked instead.

“Oh, only later. I still have a meeting with-” Jaehyun shrugged before he checked the watch on his wrist, before he almost jumped to his feet. “Holy shit! I have a meeting with Mark and Kai in two minutes.” 

“Wouldn’t it be easier if you went to the office? It’s closer to the airport.” Yuta watched a little bit unsure of what to do when Jaehyun started to clean up the table.

“Johnny’s gonna be there too, so it makes no difference. Okay,” Jaehyun stopped and stared at Yuta with big eyes and Yuta had to bite his lips not to laugh at the panic in Jaehyun’s face. “You clean this. I’ll get ready for the meeting.”

“I can’t. I have to get back to work.”

“So do I. And you made the whole mess anyway.”  Jaehyun chuckled and before Yuta could protest, Jaehyun had already disappeared into his bedroom. “You’ll clean it.”

“Can’t we leave it to Mark?” Yuta had to raise up his voice so he was sure that Jaehyun would listen, but despite his words, he at least continued to gather up the dishes that Jaehyun had left behind. 

“And have cockroaches all over the place when I get back?” Jaehyun shouted back before he showed up, only torso-up, from his bedroom and Yuta had a hard time not to stare at Jaehyun’s bare chest as he buttoned up a black shirt. “No, thanks.”

Yuta managed a chuckle before he made it to the kitchen with the empty bowls and plates, but when he got back, Jaehyun was also back into the living room, seated on the couch with his computer on his lap and, despite the formal button-up shirt, he still wore the same grey sweatpants he had lunch with, and the white cap, turned backwards. 

“You changed into a shirt, but you’re wearing a hat for the meating?” 

“Can’t find my beanie.” Jaehyun simply stated and if it wasn’t for the pink tint on Jaehyun’s ears, Yuta would say he was completely unbothered by that. 

“Of course! Beanie and sweatpants, the newest trend in business attire.” Yuta snorted. “I’m gonna try it next week.”

Jaehyun chuckled and his dimples were back in his face as he smiled without looking at Yuta as he typed on his laptop. Yuta could still see them, the dimples, when Jaehyun tried to suppress his smile and pressed a finger on his lips in sign for Yuta to stay quiet. 

“Hey. What’s up?” 

Jaehyun talked to someone on the other side of the screen and fixed his cap, still backwards and without actually taking it from his head, much to Yuta amusement. The guy really expected Yuta to clean up the kitchen as he did the meeting. 

“Yo!” Mark’s voice was easy to recognize.

“Wazzup, Jay.”  Yuta recognized Johnny’s voice, although it’s been a while since they talked to each other.

“Where’s Kai hyung?”

“He’s on a phone call but said we’ll join us soon.”

Mark explained and Jaehyun quickly glanced at Yuta and Yuta could swear he saw Jaehyun smile, just a little bit, but didn’t say anything about his presence there. 

Now, really. 

So instead of going to the kitchen, he simply leaned against the wall with his arms crossed as he watched Jaehyun. 

“Are you feeling better?” It was Mark again.

“Yeah, Jay. Tell us,” Johnny quickly added and Yuta could hear the teasing tone in the guy’s voice. “How’s your head?”

Johnny’s cheekiness left no room for the double meaning question - that was probably one of the oldest blowjob related jokes in the queer world - and Yuta had to cover his mouth not to make a noise as he snorted behind his hand.

“Shut up, Johnny” Jaehyun clearly sent daggers towards the screen and he grunted between his teeth and at that moment Yuta couldn’t be happier he stayed, instead of leaving as soon as Jaehyun announced the meeting. 

“Ah-ah. Wrong answer.” Johnny practically sang as spoke and Yuta was on the verge of tears as he tried to control his laugh “How’s your head?” 

Yuta really wasn’t sure about what was the best part about that whole conversation, because not only Jaehyun’s ears turned deeply red in embarrassment as Johnny clearly teased him about what Yuta supposed was Jaehyun’s migraines - that Mark made it very clear that those were related to his soulmate issues - but if Yuta wasn’t sure before if Jaehyun was into guys or not (althou he suspected) the simple fact that someone as close to him as Johnny brought up the queerest of queer’s joke, and expected Jaehyun to know the right answer; now Yuta was sure. 

His silent laugh probably brought Jaehyun's attention back to Yuta, or at least away from the screen as Jaehyun also glared at him with a clenched jaw before he rolled his eyes, but Jaehyun only answered when he faced back the screen. 

“Haven’t had any complaints yet.” Jaehyun even raised a bold eyebrow at them, too bold for someone who had their ears probably burning, by how red they looked, and that actually made Yuta’s laugh crack in his throat. 

But not Johnny’s, as it got louder, and Yuta thought he heard Mark's confused, high-pitched voice in the background, before someone else’s voice also echoed from the computer speakers. And that voice Yuta knew well.

“But no praises, either?“ 

Kai’s playful tone was just as clear, but if Jaehyun’s ears were red before, now his cheeks looked the same, or so Yuta thought, because as quickly as Jaehyun covered his face with his hand, Yuta rushed back inside the kitchen where he could make at least some noise. It was impossible to hold his laugh any longer and Jaehyun’s apologies were almost muffled by Johnny’s loud laugh and Mark’s voice too. 

------jj------

If there was a way (any way) that Jaehyun could hide and never show up in front of Kai again, he would take it. This, and a clean, yet painful way to kill Johnny as soon as they met - and since Johnny offered him a ride from the airport, maybe he could use Johnny’s car to hide the body -  but at least this he had all his flight back to Seoul to figure out.

The only thing that could have been any worse was if Yuta had seen his tattoo that noon. Seriously. 

But Yuta didn’t, and despite his embarrassment by the beginning of their meeting - and a couple of jokes about it from both Johnny and Kai during their forty-five minutes online appointment, things had been fine through most of it. Jaehyun was actually still needed at their new contract at Neo Zone so they decided that it was for the better if Jaehyun just stayed in Seoul for a few more days, and then they could be fully back to their project with Resonance in Japan. Which also meant a few more days without having to avoid Yuta - or to show his head around, that was - so Yuta wouldn’t see his useless soulmate tattoo. 

The fact that Yuta didn’t leave, despite having to go back to work - and despite Jaehyun still trying to hide the tattoo from him - was actually nice. The part where Yuta mocked him about Johnny’s and Kai’s playfulness wasn’t that great, though. 

“So... no praises?” Yuta repeated Kai’s words as he landed on the couch beside Jaehyun, who rolled his eyes. “That’s disappointing.”

“Shut up, Yuta.”

“No, really. You were so confident at first that I thought...” Yuta even nodded as he spoke, and the amused grin turning up the corner of his lips, plus the fast quirk up of his eyebrows, made the whole scene even more comical, but not less annoying.

He was either doing that to goof around, as they did a lot these days, or just to mock Jaehyun's competitive ass, as they found out they were just the same about the matter, but either way, Jaehyun was not letting him go that easily too. 

“Why? Were you interested before?” 

Jaehyun challenged and this time he was the one grinning when Yuta quickly turned his face and Jaehyun could swear Yuta looked (at least) a little bit embarrassed himself, but the smile never left his face, not even when he turned back towards Jaehyun. But even before Yuta could answer, Jaehyun’s heart was already unease by the daring look in Yuta’s eyes.

“What if I still am?” 

Jaehyun blamed it on his soulmate. Fucking soulmate with stupid soulmates tattos that probably fucked up his abbilities on flirting - playfully flirting, of course. Like that bullshit that Ten and Johnny did all the time despite having different soulmates; despite Johnny being utterly in love with Sehun, his actual soulmate, for years. Because, Yuta was hot, of course. And nice, he said that to Ten. And they had a lot of fun together, but they still lived in different countries, or would, in less than two months, and… as fucked up as his tattoo was, Yuta still wasn’t Jaehyun’s soulmate.

And the fact that Jaheyun’s heart beat like crazy as he simply joke-flirted with his friend - coworker, he couldn’t forget that either - it probably meant something. 

But Jaehyun wouldn’t allow that to ruin his jokes.

“Maybe i’ll let you find out when you finish cleaning the dishes.”  

“What!?” Yuta's shocked face was enough to make Jaehyun smirk. Checkmate. “Dude, I- I have to get back to work.” 

And then Jaehyun couldn’t stop laughing anymore and he did so for a while, sliding a little on his couch. 

“Dude.” He said over chuckles. “I have to take a flight in less than two hours and I need a shower.” And he still couldn’t stop. “I really appreciate that you made me lunch, but you’re gonna have to clean that on your own.” 

“I don’t even live here.” Yuta complained as Jaehyun closed his laptop and lifted up from the couch. 

“But you cooked.” Jaehyun chuckled once again. “And no head this time.” 

--

Jokes aside - and the fact that Jaehyun had the water running colder than he first intended during his shower - the fact that Yuta brought and cooked him food, and even helped him cleaning after the mess they made in the small kitchen, was actually nice. More than nice if he was to be completely honest, but he shouldn’t think - nor overthink things - when he was just about to leave for the airport. Just like he tried not to overthink when Yuta made all the way to the Tokyo station with him - at least his flight would depart from Haneda this time - since he already lost half of his afternoon at work, anyway. 

“Thank you.” Jaehyun thanked Yuta again when they dropped off the train so Jaehyun would hop on his next one to the airport, while Yuta would go back home instead, and Yuta smiled brightly at him. 

“Stop thanking me. You’re paying for lunch when you get back.” 

Yuta shrugged as he put his hands on his pockets and Jaehyun smiled. He could agree to that. 

“Deal.” 

“Is your head any better?” Yuta added with a grin, though, and Jaehyun frowned slightly, but still, he wasn’t sure about how to take that question either - he had told Yuta he’d been having migraines, after all. 

Jaehyun pressed his lips, but didn’t let the smile drop from his face as he watched Yuta.

“I don’t have a headache anymore, if that’s what you’re asking.” It wasn’t a complete lie, as his head wasn’t hurting, but the unsettling feeling on his chest was still there. softer, more subtle than it was before, but still there. 

Yuta snorted. 

“Glad to know.” He didn’t press on the joke this time as they stood there in the middle of the hectic station, with people rushing around and behind them - no wonder people wouldn’t know they met their soulmates and that’s what probably happened to Ten, Jaehyun though. And maybe to himself too. “Have a safe flight.” Yuta nodded even, before he smirked. “And when you get back, maybe you can tell me the real deal about your head.”

--

Getting back in Seoul was nice, but didn’t put Jaehyun’s heart at ease as he thought it would. 

He cursed Johnny all the way from Incheon Airport to Jaehyun’s house, instead of talking about work like they'd planned, and some about Jaehyun’s tattoo, and Winwin’s wedding, and some other random stuff about themselves and their friends. All that made him feel good and he missed all his friends, but deep inside, it was like something else was missing, and it wasn’t anxiety this time, Jaehyun knew that. It’d only been a few hours and his home was there, Seoul, but Jaehyun missed Japan already. 

The feeling didn’t go away when he stepped home, not even when he met Jungwoo, Taeil and Taeyong later that same night for late dinner at the barbecue place near his place.

It didn’t go away when he slept in his own bed. It didn’t go away when he met Winwin and Ten that Saturday afternoon for the photo session. It simply didn’t leave him, not at all.

But it soothed a little when midway through the afternoon, as Jaehyun watched with a smirk how Ten and Lucas - Winwin’s chinese bestie, as Ten used to call the guy until they met him, less than an hour ago - chatted so easily and nonstop by the window of the studio. Jaehyun had seen Ten flirting before and no matter how Ten insisted he was the Subtleness King, Jaehyun knew better and his friend was far from it at that moment. 

It usually worked, Jaehyun couldn’t take that from Ten, but it was amazing watching how Lucas didn’t seem stricken by Ten’s maneuverings, at the same time, he did nothing but look awestruck by Ten the whole time they talked, to the point Jaehyun dared saying Ten had already found himself a plus one to Winwin’s wedding. 

But it wasn’t watching his friend boldly flirt with their friend’s friend that made his heart beat tenderly, and just a little bit more at ease than it had been; it was the name that flashed on Jaehyun’s phone with an incoming message.

Yuta:

Pink, black, brown, or white?

Jaehyun snorted. 

Jaehyun: 

??

Do I get to know what I am choosing?? 

Yuta:

It’s not for you. Don’t get all fussy.

Jaehyun:

LOL 

Black? 

Yuta:

Boring

Jaehyun: 

You’re crazy

Yuta: 

I’m dying my hair again.

Jaehyun:

I thought you were going on silver this time

Yuta:

Change of plans

Jaehyun: 

Pink? 

Yuta: 

Should have asked Mark. You’re not helping

Jaehyun: 

Ok! Fine!

Brown.

White will make you look like my grandma
Brown is safe

Yuta:

White it is! ;)

Jaehyun: 

You’re nuts 

“Who are you talking to?” Ten whispered beside him - he didn’t even notice when Ten approached him, followed by Lucas, cause why wouldn’t he. “Is it your soulmate?” 

Jaehyun frowned and glanced at Ten, but he typed his reply to Yuta first.

Jaehyun:

Don’t complain later

You’re gonna look like a grandma

“Of course not.”  Jaehyun pressed his lips in a tight line and he was so glad that he was allowed to only take pictures that didn’t show the right side of his head where his soulmate tattoo stood in full display for everyone to read it. Everyone who was able to read japanese, that bit Jaehyun was thankful for. 

“Are you sure?” Ten wasn’t whispering anymore, and he soulded too boldly for Jaehyun’s liking. “Because it looked like it was.”

“It was just Yuta.” Jaehyun snorted as his phone buzzed in his hand with a new mew message, but he gave up upon hearing Ten again.

“Oh. Just hot and nice Yuta-san. Okay then.”

Jaehyun rolled his eyes at Ten’s insinuation and tried to ignore his friend through most of the afternoon, or as much as he could - which wasn’t that hard with Ten and Lucas mating thing going on - but as much as he didn’t like to admit, it felt nice talking to Yuta between photos.

The photographer even came up with an idea of all the four of them - Winwin, Lucas, Ten and Jaehyun that was - taking a few pictures with different caps and hats and even the bride and her friends joined them at some point and it turned out better and more pleasant than what Jaehyun expected, and since both the groom and the bride were happy about it, who was Jaehyun to complain. 

But as soon as the shooting ended, that feeling was back inside Jaehyun’s heart, restless and relentless. 

Being back at Seoul also meant meeting his parents for dinner and hearing his mother complaining it was too hot for him to be wearing a beanie all the time, but he couldn’t let his parents see his soulmate tattoo; not like that; not with theirs being so sweet and caring; not without it building up too many expectations for standards already too high. 

Being back in Seoul also meant that his soulmate who thought of him as just another fuckboy was nowhere around - and even if they were, they probably didn’t even want Jaehyun around, for the matter.

“Maybe…” Jaehyun said between sips of beer as leaned on the back on the armchair at Johnny’s and Sehun’s shared apartment that Sunday night - Ten had gone MIA since last night when he left the Winwin’s pre-wedding photoshoot with Lucas. “It just means I was never supposed to meet them.” 

He wondered.

“Dude,” Johnny tried to put some sense on him. “Winwin is getting married in two months with someone who isn’t his soulmate.”

“I know a lot of people who broke up with theirs.” Sehun also added with a shrug. 

“Do you?” Johnny frowned and his boyfriend shrugged again. 

Yeah, maybe Jaehyun was never supposed to meet his soulmate. 

--

“You’re overthinking.” Ten told him that Monday night as he laid on Jaehyun’s couch. Lucas had left for China and by the bright smile on Ten’s face when his phone chimed on his stomach, they exchanged phones and were making good use already. 

“Hm.” Jaehyun mumbled shortly as he stared at the wall behind the TV screen and a short silence lingered between them antil Ten poked him on his leg with his feet. 

“Stop overthinking it.” His friend repeated before he put his phone down and sat up beside him. “If you didn’t hit on anyone, your soulmate is too full of themselves and I say you’re better off without them.”

“Shouldn't you be helping me with this?” Jaehyun frowned. 

“I am! Jaehyun, listen. You’re keeping yourself from living because of someone you don’t even know and who sounds like a jerk to me.” 

“I’m not. I dated plenty of people in my life.”

“That was before.” Ten quickly added in. “Now you’re not living at all while- Jay,” Ten took a deep breath before he put on a soft smile on his face that was close to devious. “What about Yuta?”

“What about him?” 

Ten didn’t answer at first, raising an eyebrow at him, but just like that, Jaehyun ignored the way his heart jumped as fast as it did that time in Jaehyun’s apartment, as they carelessly joked about blowjobs - what was Jaehyun even thinking back then - until Ten rolled his eyes at him.

“If you’re living your life, why don’t you give him a chance? He's clearly interested. And so are you.”

Jaehyun was ready to snap back, but it was exactly because of that same afternoon in Jaehyun’s apartment that Jaehyun wasn’t sure he could deny that. 

“He’s my coworker.”

“For the time being. You’ll be back in less than two months so even if he’s lame in bed you can ignore him and then it will be a bye-bye. You’ll probably never see him again.”

“You are lame” Jaehyun chuckled and shook his head. It’s been years, but he couldn’t believe Ten sometimes. 

“Not in bed, honey. Not in bed.” Ten grinned. “And if you’re afraid of catching feelings…” Then he sighed. “Wait, and see what happens. But I think you already did, so, just… Go for it! Then you wait and see what happens.”

Now that put on a grin in Jaehyun’s face as he leaned his head towards Ten’s direction.

“Like you and Lucas?”

And Ten might have tried to hide, but the way he smiled when he turned around on the couch before he stood up was too guilty, even for Ten’s antics.

“Are you hungry? What do you say we order chinese food? There’s a new Cantonese restaurant and they’re food is amazing! ” 

Too guilty, Jaehyun snorted. 

------ny------

Yuta dyed his hair that sunday. Brown. 

He sent Jaehyun a picture that Monday.

Jaehyun: 

You look great

It really suits you

Yuta ignored that message the whole night, because his brain preferred to torture him with that same dream of lights and someone staring at him, but he couldn’t see the person's face, never. It was all blurred, but he knew that feeling, of being stared at. His lips. That was where they stared, but who? 

Yuta woke up to his neck sweating and burning hot every day that week and he was probably still imagining things. Or maybe it was just the soulmate thing that knew he had someone else in his mind most of the time instead of someone who didn’t even dare announcing himself as his soulmate. 

He still hadn't checked what it said, and that’s why he chose brown to dye his hair with, as whatever it was that was written on his nape would hardly stand out with his brown strands covering it. This, and the fact that Jaehyun suggested it. 

Aside from that one message, Yuta didn’t ignore any of the other messages he shared with Jaehyun throughout the week. They talked a lot, actually, and as much as he missed Jaehyun, talking to him always made him feel… great. 

There was only one thing that Yuta couldn’t keep out of his thoughts and that was whtMark told him: that Jaheyun found a soulmate tattoo. Jaehyun’s soulmate was around there in Japan, probably, and Jaehyun always wanted to meet his soulmate, from what Mark slipped that other day. Mark also mentioned that, for what it looked like, Jaehyun was disappointed by his tattoo. 

Yuta wondered if Jaehyun still wanted to meet them, this guy or this girl that was supposed to be his soulmate, yet. 

All those days, without Jaehyun around, Yuta also wondered if it was really worth reading his own tattoo. If he ever wanted to meet this so-called soulmate, while he could meet someone amazing, that he enjoyed talking to, and spending his time with, like Jaehyun. 

--

Jaehyun only got back from Seoul on Wednesday night, but Yuta only met him again for lunch the following Thursday, for which he didn’t pay for as he promised, since Kaid, Mark and Shotaro also joined them. 

But he did, on Friday and it had been just the two of them and there was something different about Jaehyun, something Yuta couldn’t put a name on - and it wasn’t just the fact that jaehyun wore either a beanie or a hat all the time. 

“What’s the thing with the hat?” Yuta nodded towards Jaehyun, who was seated in front of him with a dark blue button-up shirt, and a black cap. “Something tells me that’s your real head problem. Not… the other head one.” He smirked.

Jaehyun lowered his head to hide a snort and Yuta didn’t miss the way his ears turned red at the remark. It has been their joke for a week now; Jaehyun’s abilities on performing a blowjob, even though they never made it that explicit, it was just a common joke. 

“I let Ten give me a haircut.” Was Jaehyun’s short explanation, to which Yuta wasn’t impressed. Not at all.

“That’s it? You’re hiding for a week because your friend fucked up your haircut?”

“He didn’t-” Jaehyun groaned, but looked kinda constipated as he stared at Yuta for a while in complete silence before he let out a heavy breath and leaned back on the chair. “He didn’t. He gave me a sidecut and… I found my soulmate tattoo hiding under my hair. That’s it.” Jaehyun shrugged, looking somewhere else and very disappointed, just like Mark mentioned last week. 

“So…” Yuta wasn’t even sure what he wanted to say. Or ask. Or if he wanted answers to begin with, so he pressed a hand on his own nape, that felt hot all of sudden, around his own soulmate tattoo. “Isn’t it good?” 

Jaehyun silently shrugged again, still not looking at Yuta and when he did, he had his lips pressed together in a way that made his dimples stand; in a way that made Yuta’s heart beat uneasy. 

--

Yuta’s nape felt like burning the whole afternoon, and some more after he got home. That same baffling feeling also lingered inside his chest, in his lungs, and even the corner of his nails suffered from all the biting on his way home. 

When Jaehyun told him about his soulmate tattoo during lunch, it was so easy, so clear in his eyes how disappointed he was. Mark had mentioned that it was kinda bad, and it was Mark who also told him how Jaheyun always wanted to meet his soulmate, but from what Jaehyun told him that afternoon, not only he didn’t know whom his soulmate was, but he didn’t seem so eager for that anymore. 

For a while, Yuta thought that that feeling was simply guilt. He would be lying if he said that he wasn’t slightly pleased by the fact that Jaehyun wasn’t sure that he wanted to be with his soulmate anymore; but he still cared for Jaehyun. A lot. A lot more than he usually did and that already was a whole lot. Seeing his friend cast down, without the usual sparkle in his eyes as he briefly spoke about his tattoo wasn’t something that Yuta wanted for Jaehyun. Jaehyun's smile was one of the things that Yuta really liked about the other man, and it wasn't only about his dimples. 

Jaehyun’s laugh was always loud, and full. It brightened up all his face and the way that Jaehyun couldn’t control himself sometimes was even more fascinating to watch. 

It’s been a really long while since Yuta believed in soulmates. It was silly, and useless, and Yuta would rather find someone else he really like, than being stuck with someone forever - maybe forever unhappy, like a lot of people he met before - only because someone, or some called gods decided it was written in the stars, as he thought he heard in some movie on manga or whatever. 

No, Yuta didn’t want that for himself. But Jaehyun wanted it. And for a second during that lunch, when Jaehyun smiled at his stupid joke about pirates, Yuta wondered if Jaehyun would like if Yuta was his soulmate. 

Yuta caught himself wondering the same thing over and over again as he stared at his fogged image in the bathroom mirror. His hair was getting even longer, brownish ends brushing on his shoulders, like Jaehyun suggested - and covering the tattoo on his nape. 

What if… Yuta wondered… What if Jaehyun was his soulmate, instead? Would he like that?

Yuta watched his chest through the reflex, rising up at each deep breath to catch up his frantic heartbeat and he gulped; mouth and throat dry as his neck burned under his hair. He took a deep breath as his phone chimed with some incoming message he wouldn’t care about when he quickly opened the camera and before he could regret it, click. 

--

Oh my god,
he's the man of my dreams

Yuta stared at the black words that shined bright on the screen of his phone, written in korean, into his own skin, and he frowned. He didn’t remember meeting a lot of people who spoke Korean lately. Of course there was that meeting with their other Korean partners - that were not from Neo Zone - and there was Neo Zone itself - but he already met Johnny before and he wasn’t sure if this soulmate thing worked through wifi too, since he only met Jungwoo through their online meetings. There was this korean guy he met at the barbecue house he went for lunch with Mark and Jaehyun a few days after they moved in. And there was Jaehyun. 

But it couldn’t be, could it? 

------jj------

“Okay, okay.” Mark fumbled to sit properly on the couch where Yuta seated beside him, instead of his usual spot on the floor beside Jaehyun. “So, uhm.” He giggled, already too tipsy - Jaehyun said he was drunk about 30 minutes ago (maybe more, Jaehyun wasn’t sure) but Mark denied. “Watch this.”

Yuta laughed out loud beside him and Jaehyun couldn’t help but do the same when Mark would supposedly show them some trick he learned from Ten, but he barely made it out of the couch.

When Yuta suggested they should get wasted, all the three of them that weekend, so Jaehyun could forget all this soulmate thing for a while, Jaehyun clearly wasn’t expecting this. Even Mark was ready to leave their apartment when Yuta showed up with a pack of beer and a bag full of actual Korean soju. 

“If you wanna mourn about your tattoo, then at least do it properly,” were Yuta’s words when he stepped inside the apartment.

Mark was the first of them to get drunk - real drunk, no matter much he insisted on his supposed perfect state of mind - while Jaehyun and Yuta were actually just tipsy, maybe, but watching Mark being unusually talkative (and clingy) was making Jaehyun high from laughing. The fact that Yuta indulged all of Mark’s crazy ideas and stories and teased him constantly also helped Jaehyun slightly wasted state of mind.

Maybe the part where Mark leaned onto Yuta’s arm wasn’t really helping, but Jaehyun sure drank every time it happened, so it probably helped anyway. 

“Dude, shut up. You’re drunk.” Jaehyun chuckled as he watched Mark fall back on the couch on his second attempt to stand up.

“I’m- okay, but just a little.”

It took them another few minutes to convince Mark he should stop for the night, but taking him to his bedroom had been surprising easily - especially when Mark dived head first onto his bed and snorted the second his face hit the pillow. They all were working like crazy lately, as the project improved and so did the amount of tasks - tasks they should finish before returning to Korea in not much more than a month and half.

Time passed faster than Jaehyun expected in Japan, and the fact that he actually missed it during his short stay in Seoul didn’t help easing that longing feeling that filled Jaehyun; until he remembered about his tattoo, that was.

Jaehyun brushed his hand through his head and for a second, he almost forgot about Yuta standing right beside him and almost pulled off his cap. 

“Do we have any soju left?” He sighed and left the bedroom towards the living room even before Yuta could answer, and just like that, he grabbed two other bottles of the drink, the two last ones.

“Thanks.” Yuta said and he slid from the couch to the floor, beside Jaehyun. “So… How’s your head?”

The playful smirk on Yuta’s lips made Jaehyun bark a loud laugh, or maybe it was that awkward feeling in his guts - the good kind of awkwardness. 

“I’m better.”

Jaehyun answered the real meaning behind the question, instead of the teasing one, but Yuta didn’t let it go that easily.

“Been practicing?” 

Once again Jaehyun's loud laugh filled the room, this time followed by Yuta’s too, who added. “Come on, it can’t be that bad.”

Another roar of laughs from both of them mixed with the sound coming from the TV - long forgotten in some random Japanese channel - and Jaehyun didn’t really stop even between sips, not when he leaned his head on the couch behind them.

“I don’t know what we’re talking about anymore.” 

Jaehyun chuckled as he watched Yuta, and the way that his lips still curved into a grin as his eyebrows furrowed, his nose crunching slightly - Yuta mentioned he used to wear a nose piercing before, Jaehyun remembered. 

“What are the options again?”

“Haircut, stupid tattoo, and my blowjob skills.”  Jaehyun answered bluntly, not really paying attention to what he said as he thought that Yuta would probably look great with a nose piercing. 

“Can I choose?”

Or maybe on his lips.

Jaehyun grinned. “The haircut is great.” He stated before he chuckled and his mouth turned into a wider smirk as he faced the TV in front of them for a change. “I look hot.” He added after he remembered Ten’s words after they checked some of the photos they took together that weekend. 

Yuta simply laughed beside him.

“Right.”

“The tattoo is stupid.” Jaehyun frowned slightly this time, but that uneasiness that he’d been feeling for days didn’t bother him this time; not when he turned back to Yuta and the good-kind-of-awkward feeling made him at ease, at least while he watched Yuta’s arched eyebrow - he would look good with an eyebrow piercing too, Jaehyun thought. “It is. It calls me a fuckboy.” 

“What?” 

Jaehyun actually smiled this time, copying Yuta’s open laughter. 

“I told you it’s stupid.” 

“And aren’t you? A fuckboy.” Yuta chuckled, but Jaehyun groaned, rolling his eyes. 

“I’m not.” 

“You’re bragging about your head skills for a week! And!” Yuta pointed a finger in the air as he leaned his head on the couch, face turned towards Jaehyun and Jaehyun grinned. “You just called yourself hot.” 

“It’s true.” Jaehyun shuggered. 

“That’s exactly what a fuckboy would say.”

“Do I look like a fuckboy?” Jaehyun looked straight into Yuta’s eyes this time and along the awkwardness, his heart beated faster - Yuta was watching him, with the same grin, only it didn’t look that playful, but it actually made it even more teasin; tempting.

“A little.” Yuta chuckled through a puff of breath and Jaehyun really thought that Yuta would look awesome with a lip-ring. 

“A little?” Jaehyun also chuckled before he licked his lips, his mouth suddenly dry. He didn’t notice when it happened, but his shoulder felt warm, hot even, when Yuta leaned against him - or maybe it was him who leaned on Yuta this time. “You know,” He chuckled again. “It doesn’t sound that bad when you say it.”

“That’s because you’re drunk.” Yuta scoffed behind his smile, and in fact, he looked just as tipsy as Jaehyun. 

“I’m not that drunk.” It really felt warmer and warmer inside the room, or maybe it was just Jaehyun’s heart, ready to explode inside his chest; or it was the way that Yuta watched him, so close, so beautiful… like a dream. Just like the first time that Jaehyun first saw him that night on the party - Jaehyun remembered that now, as he watched Yuta’s lips, the way his jaw curved (not too sharp, not too soft), the way he grinned at Jaehyun and how his black eyes hooded as they stared directly at Jaehyun’s lips; Jaehyun noticed that too. He smirked. “I still know all I said is true.”

This time, when Yuta chuckled, his breath brushed warm on Jaehyun’s chin.

“That you’re hot?”

“Yeah.” He nodded, and this time Yuta’s eyes met his and Jaehyun knew: Yuta thought that too, as he never denied that. 

“That you’re a fuckboy?”

“Speculation.” Jaehyun nodded, just once this time, his eyebrow arching, but his eyes actually lowered to Yuta’s lips once more, and when Yuta’s eyes followed the same path to Jaehyun’s mouth. They were so close that Jaehyun could actually feel Yuta’s perfume, their shoulders pressed together. “And I still give good head.” 

“Speculation.” Yuta answered back with a teasing grin. “But we could work on that.”

It was Jaehyun who scoffed this time, and Yuta was impossibly close; so close that Jaehyun’s hand had no trouble finding its way to cup Yuta’s chin, as he pulled him even closer. 

“Maybe I can let you let you find out.” Jaehyun breathed right against Yuta’s lips before he pressed their mouths together and screw soulmates, tattoos, co-workers ethics and whatever stupid thing dared play in the back of Jaehyun’s mind. 

Yuta’s lips were soft, warm, but hungry as they molded against Jaehyun’s lips and Jaehyun wouldn’t dare stop that. Like he didn’t and their lips brushed and molded more and more until Jaehyun had Yuta’s mouth all for himself, like Yuta’s hot hand on his neck - like the feeling of holding Yuta so close; like the feeling inside his chest where all the awkwardness, that longing and lasting uneasiness that followed him for months now finally seemed to settle down and Jaehyun had never beat so right. 

It really felt like a dream; the way that Yuta pulled him closer, that Yuta pulled the bottle from his hand and then all Jaehyun could feel was Yuta’s body pressing against his as he moved to sit on Jaehyun’s lap and Yuta’s body between his arms. 

------ny------

Yuta could barely think. 

In fact, all he could think about was the way that Jaehyun held him; the way that Jaehyun’s mouth still tasted like soju against his own; the way he clung onto Yuta’s clothes before his hands found their way beneath Yuta’s shirt and how warm his breath felt against his skin. And if the way that Jaehyun’s lips made their way down Yuta’s neck was any sign, Jaehyun wasn’t joking at all about his skills. 

Yuta wasn’t that drunk. Neither was Jaehyun - Yuta just knew and he had seen Jaehyun worse, that same night when they met, inside that nightclub where Jaehyun stared at him like that with the same dark eyes, heavy on his lips and teasing; inviting even without letting out a word. Yuta was tired that night - after a trying to avoid a group of of stupid boys, right in front of his co-wrokers. 

All that teasing, it wasn’t an all of a sudden thing; it was just written between lines of their jokes these days - especially while Jaehyun was in Seoul. Still, what happened that night, wasn’t something that Yuta expected - but now that he had it, he wasn’t willing to stop.

He didn’t stop and he couldn’t, not with the way that Jaehyun’s lips and teeth and tongue worked on his skin; down, then up his neck, behind his ear and biting on his earrings. Not with Jaehyun’s skin warm even beneath clothes with toned muscles as Yuta’s hands pressed on Jaehyun’s arms, chest… Not with Jaheyun pulling him closer, their bodies fully pressed together and fuck, it was a kiss.

A low gasp escaped almost in a moan when Jaehyun kissed him full on his lips again, then again, and again, deeper and hungrier at every kiss, between pulled lips in not so soft bites and when Yuta pulled Jaehyun’s lips hard between his teeth, it was Jaehyun who groaned, low, that only Yuta could hear him, or so he thought. 

“Bedroom.” Jaehyun whispered before pulling Yuta into another kiss, too long for someone who had any intention on moving to a different room, but not long enough. Or maybe enough, when Yuta rolled his hips on Jaehyun’s lap and a low moan escaped both their lips that brushed parted against each other.

“Bedroom.” Jaehyun repeated, his voice low and huskier than usual. “Now.”

Yuta barely knew how they made it, troubling and almost falling down - twice - as they tried to stand up from the floor between muffled kisses and forgotten bottles of soju.

There was no need to rush, but it was like they couldn’t stop, and didn't, as they kissed all the way inside Jaehyun’s bedroom, hands fumbling with shirts and belts - and thank god Mark was a heavy sleeper, especially when drunk, while they were making too much noise for their own good. The sound of the door hitting the wall by Yuta’s body pressed against Jaehyun’s echoed in the apartment before Jaehyun pulled him again and another bang of the door filled the room, this time when Jaehyun closed it without a care behind them. 

Jaehyun’s hands were warm, like his body once again pressed on Yuta’s, like their lips and tongues that danced together with yuta pulling Jaehyun even closer. But Jaehyun’’s hands felt even warmer on his skin as they pushed up Yuta’s shirt. Their breaths were heavy, both unsteady when they broke the kiss and there was something about the way that Jaehyun smirked that made Yuta’s breath even heavier; or it was the way that Jaehyun’s fingers brushed on his stomach before they found the only other piercing left on Yuta’s body, the silver pendant pierced through his belly. 

Jaehyun chuckled as he pulled it slightly and Yuta grinned before he pushed his hips further, indulging whatever passed through Jaehyun’s mind - as the way that his eyes darkened under the dimmed lights of Jaehyun’s bedroom, and the way he licked his lower lips left little room for imagination. They started this after Jaehyun’s supposed mouth skills, after all. Skills which Yuta had really no complaints, so far - except that he still didn’t get what Jaehyun promised, yet.

“Don’t you have something to show me?” Yuta said over a grin and Jaehyun stared at his eyes with a lopsided grin. 

“You didn't tell me you had a piercing.” Jaehyun whispered against his lips, one hand coming to cup on Yuta’s chin as he pulled the piercing between his fingers with the other and Yuta hissed. 

“I wasn’t sure you were interested.” He whispered back between a short chuckle. 

“I could say the same.” 

Yuta had no time to reply this time when Jaehyun pulled his face closer to him into a deep kiss and they didn’t have to rush, but they kissed as if the world would end if they stopped, if their hands left each other, or if their bodies parted, even the merest; so they didn’t. Not until Jaehyun’s kisses were back on his neck, down his shoulders and over his chest. 

Yuta had been there (in Jaheyun’s bedroom) numerous times before, like he had been in Mark’s room, but Jaehyun’s scent was even stronger there, and it didn’t matter this wasn’t really his room, it looked just like Jaehyun; comfortable, but mysterious and inviting, lighten up by a single spotlight by the corner. 

“You're so beautiful.”Jaehyun muttered against his skin and Yuta’s hands pressed further down Jaehyun’s arms. “God...” He whispered as his kisses followed back to Yuta’s mouth. “So beautiful…” And without notice, he pulled from Yuta's body and kneeled on the floor.

But Yuta chuckled. 

Jaehyun was right there, in front of him with his hands on Yuta’s hips and ready to work on his pants, but he still wore that same white hat, backwards.

“You really look like a fuckboy like this.” Yuta said over a large grin. 

“That’s not what you’re supposed to say to someone who’s about to have their teeth around your dick.”

Yuta laughed at Jaehyun’s playful tone, despite his words, and Jaehyun also chuckled a little. 

“Take your hat off.”

“No.”

“You said you looked hot with the sidecut and if you’re as good as you say.” Yuta’s smile grew even larger by the sight of Jaehyun’s arched eyebrow. “I’m gonna need something to hold on.” 

Jaehyun rolled his eyes but chuckled, not looking amused, neither intimidated by Yuta’s words. 

“I’m sure you will, but no.”

“Come on, Jaehyun. Let me see it.” Yuta frowned as he pushed his hips forward and towards Jaehyun and the movement made the bulge on his pants even more prominent, and tight. 

A short groan that sounded more like a moan escaped from Yuta’s lips in frustration - from both the lack of attention on his body, and from curiosity. Although Jaehyun really looked like a hot fuckboy on his knees and his hat, Yuta just wanted to see him without it. 

“Please.” 

Jaehyun sighed in front of him and his hands pressed tight on Yuta’s body, before he rolled his eyes.

“The things I do for you.” Jaehyun chuckled as he finally pulled off his cap and tossed it on the floor like he did with Yuta’s shirt.

Yuta’s lips curved into a smile, large and pleased, and fuck yeah, Jaehyun looked hot, but still a perfect fuckboy, on his knees for Yuta as he brushed his hand on the remaining long strands of his hair. The room was darker behind him and the soft light brushed on the side of Jaehyun’s face; lips parted, hair all messed up - and Yuta haven’t even placed his hands on them yet - and the dark lines of a tattoo marked the skin, slightly hidden by the short hair, but not enough to block Yuta from reading it. 

“Not another fuckboi hitting on me, 
I've had enough tonight”

The sight of Jaehyun like that after all the teasing was breathtaking enough - Jaehyun didn’t need to take off his clothes to look stunning - but those words, that tattoo, marked forever in Jaehyun’s skin in a dark room with only a stray of light hitting his face made the air stop on Yuta’s lungs. 

It’s been over a month since he started dreaming the same dream every night, about someone staring at him in a dark room with only flashes of light around them. Everynight, Yuta woke up with his heart beating fast, his neck damp and hot, and a feeling that Yuta could never name. It’s been a while since those dreams made him more uneasy, everytime he couldn’t stop thinking about Jaehyun either. It had been a while - since Yuta found out about Jaehyun’s soulmate tattoo - that Yuta felt his neck even warmer, his nape burning under the thought of Jaehyun and a soulmate he couldn’t care less, until that moment. 

Yuta’s body was already hot from Jaehyun’s kisses, from his touches, from being so close and so tempting and promising, but when yuta recognized the words inked on Jaehyun’s skin - thoughts of that same moment he catch this stranger staring at his lips in a nightclub - another fuckboy - filled his mind. 

“Yuta?” Jaehyun called him back to Earth, but he still kneeled in front of him, a glimpse of his teasing smirk still tugged on the corner of his lips as brushed  his hands on Yuta's still clothed legs. 

“It's not that bad.” Yuta chuckled slightly breathless as he was caught staring, probably too much and just as embarrassed. He still couldn’t believe it. “Your tattoo.”

Jaehyun snorted, but the smile didn’t leave his face as he actually pulled Yuta by his hips. a teasing hand brushing up inside Yuta’s tight. “Can we focus on the other head I’m supposed to show you?” 

They both chuckled this time and Yuta was already having a hard time (pun intended) with Jaehyun like that, let alone as he was trying to process all that information implied - no, Yuta was sure - on Jaehyun’s skin. 

“What about your soulmate?” Yuta asked before noticing and Jaehyun’s grin grew wider, careless and even more tempting than before. 

“You know…” Jaehyun breathed as he stood up, but his hands never left Yuta’s body. His fingers brushed on Yuta’s stomach, then around the piercing before he pulled it again - just a light pull that made Yuta’s body shiver and his hips pressed forward, and this time, against Jaehyun’s, who pushed back. “I’m not saying this because we’re doing this.” He muttered and Yuta could feel his eyes heavy on his face, his lips close enough for Yuta to reach with his own, but they didn’t touch. Jaehyun's arm circled around his waist and a smile, less teasing, maybe a little silly, but not any less tempting. “But I always dreamed that my soulmate would be someone like you.” Jaehyun chuckled and they were so close that despite the dim light, Yuta could see Jaehyun’s cheeks turning pink. 

Yuta chuckled. “Are you always this cheesy?” 

But Jaehyun shrugged, his smile getting brighter, just like Yuta’s, who pulled Jaehyun closer again by his arms, then up his shoulder, his neck, until his fingers finally reached Jaehyun’s short hair, still soft under his hand, but what he reached was the words beneath it.

“What about you?” Jaehyun whispered as their lips also brushed. 

“I’m not cheesy.” They once again chuckled, louder this time, after Yuta’s blunt response and Jaehyun pulled him from the wall, turning them around the room. “But I think…”

“You think…?” Jaehyun asked between soft kisses on Yuta’s chin when the words didn’t come out. 

“I think-” His words were cut by a soft moan when Jaehyun’s mouth on his neck caught him by surprise. “I just found mine.”

Jaehyun lips raft Yuta’s skin too quickly and when Yuta opened his eyes, Jaehyun was staring at him with a light frown and an amused grin. 

“Do you want to stop now?” 

“No, fuckboy,” Yuta chuckled and he couldn't help his smile as his fingers brushed over Jaehyun’s tattoo again. “I’m saying that I never cared about finding my soulmate, but I think I just did.” He chuckled and maybe it was the alcohol that still ran inside him that made him like that, or maybe it wasn’t, but he couldn’t stop smiling. “You really looked like a fuckboy that night, but I think you’re the cheesiest fuckboy I ever met.”

------jj------

Yuta wasn’t that drunk, neither was Jaehyun; Jaehyun was sure about that. In fact, he was getting sober and sober, or at least he felt like all he cared about was kissing Yuta and having him for himself. He didn’t care about his soulmate as he finally felt at ease, with Yuta between his arms and in that moment, while he held and touched and kissed Yuta, maybe all this soulmate thing was just something silly and, maybe - Jaehyun wondered - he didn’t need that.

Yeah, Jaehyun could probably forget about this soulmate and about the ethics that said you shouldn’t date a coworker - they didn’t even work in the same room - and Japan wasn’t far from Korea, after all - they could manage that. In that moment, Jaheyun really thought about how he really always dreamed of meeting someone like Yuta. Until Yuta said it.

“You really looked like a fuckboy that night, but I think you’re the cheesiest fuckboy I ever met.”

It felt like Jaheyun’s heart was ready to jump from his chest, again -  and how come it never sounded that bad when Yuta called him a fuckboy? - and Yuta’s touch was soft on the side of his head, but nothing compared to the fondness on his eyes as he watched the path from his finger.

“What?” Jaheyun gulped, not dry, and that uneasy feeling was suddenly back, only stronger and… not that unease; not at all, as it made Jaehyun’s heart feel warm, like when he met Yuta again that Thursday for lunch.

Yuta chuckled, staring back into his eyes and the teasing smirk only grew larger, almost infuriating, when Yuta asked him: “Do you really think I was the man of your dreams?” He chuckled. “That’s the cheesiest thing I ever saw a fuckboy say in my life, and you weren’t even trying to get into my pants yet.”

“What?” Jaehyun repeated and a breath laugh left his mouth, but Yuta grinned so beautifully at him, his smile full and bright and Jaheyun knew it wasn’t just the alcohol, when he remembered; that night, after a few drinks and the most beautiful smile that Jaehyun had ever seen, in the most beautiful person that Jaehyun had ever seen as they moved under dimmed lights and those lips, that mouth - Jaehyun dreamed about it every night - they were Yuta’s.  

He couldn’t believe it.

“Let me see it.” Jaehyun muttered, still awestruck by all that happened. “Let me see your tattoo.”

Yuta seemed a little hesitant as he bit his lower lip, but he also seemed just as shocked and confused as Jaehyun - and at the same time pleased, about all that that happened - before he let out a breathy laugh. He lowered his head, just slightly and only then he let go of Jaehyun’s arm to brush off the hair from his neck. Jaehyun’s eyes followed each movement with a racing heart and an eagerness that rivaled all the unsettledness he felt through months, while Yuta turned slightly between his arms. 

Slightly hidden by some strands of hair that fell on Yuta’s nape, the words in hangul appeared in black, in a hand write that looked so familiar it was like Jaehyun had written there himself. He chuckled, the low sound of a puff of breath suddenly too loud in the silent bedroom. 

It was true. Jaehyun had found his soulmate. He found his soulmate before he knew who they were, or who they could be. Jaehyun didn’t really remember that night, but he remembered how meeting Yuta that night seemed so right; like they had always known each other, at the same time Jaehyun loved every minute he spent with Yuta, every minute they got to know each other. He would never let Ten know, but he indeed liked Yuta - in a probably more than friendly way - from the moment they met; and from the moment they, Jaehyun wished that, just maybe, Yuta liked him back - as in, a more-than-just-friends way. And that night, even before they kissed - Jaehyun just knew that - Yuta liked him too.

That night, Jaehyun didn't need a tattoo to know: he had found someone that could be his soulmate, as he had fallen in love with Yuta regardless of any tattoo; regardless of any soulmate, written by the stars. 

Or maybe, as his grandma used to say, it happened just like it was supposed to: written by the stars. And whatever it was, it didn’t matter, not anymore. 

Jaehyun’s lips curved into a smile as he brushed his fingers over Yuta’s, pulling his hands so he could touch it, the tattoo on Yuta’s skin, written because of Jaehyun - or so he thought. 

“You know what’s funny?” He chuckled, “I don’t really remember that night.” 

“What!?” Yuta whispered and tried to turn around, but Jaehyun held him still with a hand on his waist and stepped closed, until he had Yuta close to him again; so close he could feel the warmth of Yuta’s naked back against his clothed chest; so close he would feel the softness of Yuta’s skin as Jaehyun’s lips brushed on the base of his neck. “I don’t remember.” He whispered, then chuckled. “But it looks like something I could think about.” 

Yuta’s annoyed groan turned into a moan when Jaehyun finally pressed his mouth on nape and their bodies close together, before Yuta  finally turned around in his arms and muttered against his lips. 

“God, you really sound so cheesy for a fuckboy.”

To what Jaehyun grinned. “A fuckboy who’s in love with you and might show you more than just head if you just stop talking and kiss me.” 

And just like that, Yuta’s lips turned into a smirk - and oh, Jaehyun had sure dreamed about that smirk - before his hand closed on Jaehyun’s shirt and pulled him as their lips met in a kiss, so perfect that Jaehyun couldn’t possibly had ever dreamed before. 

------ny------

There was an old legend that said that every human soul that inhabits the Earth was once part of a flickering star, somewhere in the galaxy. 

And just like every other soul that inhabited Earth, Yuta grew up to tales like that. 

It wasn’t like Yuta never believed in these tales, because he did for a while, when he was young and dreamed too much. But for years, if someone told him he would meet his soulmate he would probably laugh at them. Not because it couldn’t happen because he saw that happen. Yuta saw soulmates that met were probably happily ever after; he saw soulmates that met and broke up and hated each other; he saw soulmates that met, but never dated, neither cared for each other; he met people who had soulmates but never met them as just had words marked on their skin forever - and some of them met other people and lived happily ever after, while some lived alone, forever; yuta saw soulmates that instead of dating had became the best friends they could ever have and soulmates that were together, but were never friends. 

Yuta wasn’t sure if it was luck or fate, or just life as it was; crazy and beautiful as it was full of surprises, but Yuta - who didn’t bother to find his soulmate, had indeed found his soulmate.

He found a soulmate he didn’t think he wanted, when he met a person he knew he wanted - as a friend, as a lover, as someone he cared about - and he fell in love with that person. Yuta fell in love with Jaehyun even when he knew he had a tattoo - a soulmate tattoo - but it didn’t stop him. 

Yuta also knew he had found a friend when he met Jaehyun - one of the greatest and that, slowly, turned into the best, and Yuta was really lucky and thankful for that. 

Yuta found Jaehyun - a friend, and a lover, even before he found his soulmate. And whatever it was (life, or luck, or fate), his soulmate was also Jaehyun. 

“What are you thinking about?” Jaehyun muttered on his ear before his lips pressed on his cheek, then down his jaw, his neck… as Jaehyun’s arms curled around his waist and Yuta leaned his back on Jaehyun’s chest.

Yuta smiled - he always loved watching the stars when he was at home, in Osaka, as Osaka's sky was always brighter than Tokyo’s. 

“Do you think we really used to be parts of the same star?” 

“I do.” Jaehyun muttered, his voice soft and low and longing - Jaehyun always had longing eyes when he stared at the sky at night. “Don’t you?”

Yuta chuckled and when Jaehyun brushed his nose on his cheek before he placed another kiss there, Yuta couldn’t help but smile.

“Yeah… Maybe we did.” He muttered. “Did you talk to Ten?”

“Not yet. But Winwin said it’s all cool. I’m sure you’re gonna like each other.”

Yuta chuckled to that before he turned his head, just enough to press his nose on Jaehyun’s chin and soon, Jaehyun’s lips found his on his own in a sweet, slow kiss. 

They still had two weeks for the wedding - Winwin’s wedding, that was. - and it was Jaehyun’s last weekend in Japan. Mark had left the night before back to Seoul, while Jaehyun stayed. 

It wasn’t the first time that they’d been together at Yuta’s hometown, as they did that trip together - Mark, Jaehyun and Yuta - just two weeks ago and another couple of weeks after that night they kissed. It had been just as fun as Yuta had planned, plus the added adrenaline of stolen kisses while Mark wasn’t paying attention. Mark found out about them the morning after, sinse Jaehyun forgot to lock the door sometime in the middle of the night and as Mark said, it was enough trauma to find his friends fucking so early in the morning while he had a hangover, so they kept it low on PDAs in front of Mark, at least for that weekend. 

This time, it was just the two of them and in a few days Jaehyun would move back to Seoul. They would meet again in two weeks, for Winwin’s wedding where Yuta was now Jaehyun’s plus-one, and none of them were really sure what was about to happen after that. 

There would be some training from Resonance with Neo Zone this time - in Korea - and this time Yuta would maybe be part of the team. There was also a chance that their project would need someone from Neo Zone to go back to Japan - probably Jaehyun - so they weren't sure, but there were possibilities.

Whatever happened, what really mattered was what both of them already knew: that, soulmates or not, they were in love, so much in love with each other, that no matter where, they would always be together. Always, and hopefully forever, throughout their new eternity.