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He doesn't get why people do this to themselves.
He doesn't get why people do this to themselves, with him.
Zoro glares down at the girl who's bowing, arms extended and envelope in her shaking hands. She's a nervous wreck, stumbling over her words and unable to look him in the eyes. He wants to scoff but he can't, because she's come all this way. The girl is brave, he'll give her that, and is actually one of the few people he doesn't mind hanging off of him. Zoro just doesn't know what made her think she'd ever be any different from the other girls who approached him.
Sighing, he unglues himself from the hallway wall and taps her shoulder, giving her a strained smile. "Not interested." He says, as gently as he can because he respects her for at least trying, its more than he could ever do. She visibly deflates, straightening her body and looks at him with wide brown that absolutely should not have the same affect on him as if it were Chopper. But fucking hell it does and now Zoro is blushing as he figures out a way to tell the girl that yes he's flattered, really, but no because there's an infuriating blonde that has pissed him off to no fucking end.
One that he also wouldn't be against kissing.
Kissing a lot.
"Sorry." He adds, as an afterthought, because he doesn't know just how much of her feelings are real but he knows from experience that this hurts and he really isn't trying to put people through unnecessary pain. She smiles at him but its wobbly and fake, and he knows it. Hell the entire fucking hallway knows it, everyone stopping to watch like they were two circus freaks. Zoro growls at them, baring his teeth in a snarl and like a movie unpaused they keep walking. Some people linger but enough disperse that he feels comfortable talking again.
He doesn't talk much, unless with Nakama.
Or arguing with the stupid Curlybrow.
"I-I'm sorry." The girl-- really now, he should've paid attention to her name-- "I know you don't like all the people but I thought that if we were alone I'd be too scared to do anything."
He understands the sentiment and her line of thinking so he doesn't say anything, instead raising a brow because clearly she isn't finished talking yet. But maybe she misinterprets what she means because her face lights up and she backs away with frantic hand waves. "Nonono I didn't mean it like that!"
Like what? He wants to ask but doesn't because it dawns on him what she's implying and he snorts, rolling his eyes. And people said boys were natural perverts. "I know you didn't mean it like that." He says, a full sentence because the girl really is sweet and deserves that much at least.
Shame that Zoro doesn't too much care for sweet things.
"Look." He starts off, voice rough and words minced and damn can't he sound nice just this once? The 19 year old takes a deep breath, mentally preparing to humiliate himself in the poor attempt of salvaging the dignity of a girl who's name he can't even remember. Great. Way to be a team player. "I admire your resolve."
He forgot he dissolved into extra formal speaking whenever he was uncomfortable. Fuck it. "You're brave, very brave for approaching me with your feelings. Its something I can't do, and I envy you for it."
Envy? Non-existent god don't let Sanji walk by and hear him spewing this shit. "Frankly, I'm honored, but I'm...interested in someone else. Someone who doesn't share my sentiments, so trust when I say I might know a bit of how your feeling. I wouldn't wish this on anyone, so I'm sorry that I'm causing you pain."
He knows his face his red and honestly the girl doesn't look much better and contrary to the popular belief Zoro does have a sense of humor thank you very much so he starts to laugh, a low rumble. Because what the fuck. They probably look ridiculous. It only takes a moment until the girl is laughing with him and with some relief he can see that yes her smile is genuine.
It makes him happier than he'd ever admit to anyone. When they finally calm down, she gives him a smile. Its bittersweet, but strong and determined and for a brief moment the swordsman is tempted to try things out with the person. She seems like a fire cracker underneath the shy exterior, like someone Zoro could truly see himself with. But the thought flees almost as soon as it arrives, chased out by sea blue eyes and the smell of cigarette smoke.
"Thank you." The girl says. "I mean it, I really do. Good luck as well. Whoever you end up with will be luck to have you." And quicker than he can react she leans forward, placing a peck on his cheek. Then walks off, a completely different person radiating confidence and fuck if a part of him isn't regretting his decision.
Its only after she's gone that Zoro realized she shoved the confession letter into his hands.
Sneaky girl.
He'll be sure to remember her.
"Seriously Zoro, this is starting to get ridiculous." Nami says, pouting as he hands her the letter, knowing she put them all in a box for him. Call it sentimental but he really can't bring himself to get rid of something someone put their heart into, deep feelings or not. Besides, Nami isn't mad, not at him at least. She just doesn't like losing money to Robin, who happens to be their history teacher but also one of their closest friends.
Zoro wonders why the hell Robin had so much faith in him, but he's sure its more like the strange woman gets off on unknown odds. Especially on beating unknown odds. So the swordsman just sneers at Nami and laughs when she takes away the note from his hands. They're hanging out at Vivi's place for their annual Friday movie night btu half the crew is here.
Maybe he should pass the time with homework but who the fuck does that? Definitely not him, and besides, he can tell with the shared glance that those conniving women share that they likely have other plans too.
"So, swordsman-san." Robin starts and Zoro has to give it to Nami because their dark haired history teacher can ego stroke like a fucking champ. "Ms. Bellemere and I have been talking."
"When are you going to confess to Sanji?" The red head interjects, clearly not in mood for prolonged games. Zoro sends her a death glare, cold enough to freeze hell over.
She only smiles.
"I won't." He says, not bothering to deny it because what the fuck is the point of that when they already know?
Nami looks at him for a long moment before leaning in with a conspiratorial smirk. "I'll help you out. For a fee, of course. 5% interest."
"No thanks." Zoro says, knowing that its pointless because she has that look in her eyes which means the plan has already been concocted. What bullshit.
The movie is long and boring and Zoro can't focus because for some god forsaken reason the damn blonde idiot chose to sit next to him of all people. He always thought dress code was stupid but maybe the creators were on to something because Zoro never realized just how distracting a shoulder could be.
Somehow their legs get tangled in a fight that the swordsman firmly tells himself is not footsies.
Sanji is pressed up against his side on the small couch. He's warm.
Zoro's thankful that the dark room hides the blush in his face.
Its not until Monday that Nami makes good on her promise. Zoro knows that she's made good on her promise because the moment he walks in all eyes turn to him. He growls and makes his way to his desk, not bothering to acknowledge the calculating stare that Sanji is giving him. He has no idea with what the stupid witch told him, and its too fucking early to try and figure it out.
He catches the eye of the girl from Friday and she gives him a small nod. He nods back.
There's a disturbingly disorienting moment where his body reacts before his mind and suddenly Zoro has a lean ankle in his grasp and his eyes trail traitorously up sinfully long legs. Really though, is it truly his fault? No one, should be allowed to have a body that attractive. It simply went against all logic. He gave the cook an arrogant smirk, releasing his leg.
It wasn't random starting up a fight for no reason, but it hadn't happened in a while. "The hell has your panties in a twist?"
Zoro thinks he can hear a vein pop in Sanji's forehead and he can't even find it properly funny because the whipped part of him is worried. He doesn't have to be though, because then Sanji slams a single sheet of notebook paper onto the desk. At the bottom of the sheet is a single sticker heart and without bothering to try and read the words under the cook's hands, he knows what it is.
"Finally got someone who looked past your eyebrows?" Zoro drawls, raising a brow and fixing Sanji with his most disinterested glare he can muster.
He tells himself silently that tracking down and threatening to dismember the poor girl that confessed would not be something the shitty fucking cook would approve of.
Said shitty cook gives him an incredulous stare before lifting the paper, showing the simple note and its signature.
I like you shitty cook.
-Zoro.
Zoro decides to go back on his earlier restraint and kill Nami. But then, he knows she truly means to help him. He studies the paper, then studies Sanji's face, which grows darker and darker shades of red the longer he looks.
Cute. Very cute but bad brain that is not the current focus right now.
The thing is, Sanji knows what his handwriting looks like, and that isn't his handwriting. With a small quirk of his lips, Zoro realizes that Nami is giving him an out. Forcing his head, but showing the exist.
He asks himself if he really wants to leave, especially when its all right here.
"Rare to see you mad about a confession." He says airily, not really looking the blonde in the eye, but not looking away either. He'd rather not do this with an audience but suddenly he understands what that girl meant. There's a certain expectation hanging in the air for him to speak, so he speaks. Peer pressure is a bitch.
Sanji shakes the paper roughly, shoving it in his face like he missed the point which he did but it was on purpose.
"Its a confession from you." The pale teen hisses and ouch it hurts. Not that Zoro expected anything less but he didn't realize someone could make a second person noun sound like such a curse. Apparently thats possible. But then Sanji was always good at whatever he put his mind to. "You understand what I'm saying right?"
Yes. He understands but why is the cook making such a big deal about it. The blonde is no stranger to LGBTQ+ Nami being lesbian, Luffy being aroace, and Usopp bi-curious. Sure the cook is straighter than a ruler but is it such a surprise that Zoro doesn't give a fuck which team he ends up on? He just wants the best.
Bastard should really be flattered that for some unholy reason the swordsman considers him the best.
He gives Sanji an unimpressed glare and says, "What of it?"
The stupid cook shuts down and seems to break. Zoro finds it amusing.
Their teacher walks in and class starts before the blonde can say anything back.
Its only after the fact that Zoro realizes he just confessed.
When class is over he does not run. He speedily walks home. He pretends not to hear Sanji's call of "Marimo!"
When Zoro goes to school the next day, Kaede-- because he finally fucking remembered her name-- is at his desk, bucket in one hand and wet rag in the other. She pauses in what she's doing before beckoning him over. There's words all over his spot, written in permanent marker and partially washed clean but its not to hard to make out.
Faggot.
Gay.
Go die with a dick up your ass. But you'd probably like that.
I can't believe I confessed to a fruit cake.
I never really liked him anyways.
He glances up at Kaede who's wearing a tense expression, her eyes burning with fierce fire and Zoro gives her a rare, genuine smile because she fucking deserves it. "These are all false but hell, that last one sounds shit deep in denial."
She snorts, the dark look on her face fading and she throws the rag at him, reflexes the only thing keeping it from slapping him across the chest. "I did what I could." The girl says and damn she really is totally different.
Sanji doesn't show up to class and someone makes a slick remark that Zoro scared him off. Something about it makes sense the womanizer would go pussy.
Zoro decks the smug, homophobic son of a bitch and breaks his fucking nose-- who's bleeding like a pussy now you fucking asshole? He tells the fuckwad that Sanji's not scared of shit, and then he gets kicked of of class.
Even kendo isn't the same and Zoro refrains from killing his team mates. All of which are skeptical of him because he's holding a shinai, a "stick" like they aren't participating in the same fucking sport.
He should relax with saying the word fuck so much.
"Fucking pay attention." Kuina snaps, the only one who'll spar with him, though she's the only one on his level anyways. A level above him if he's honest.
She knows whats going on, hell everyone does. But Kuina gives zero shits, more dedicated to the sport than he is. People used to think that they were together, a funny though disgusting thought in and of itself. As if.
She's strong but not for him. Ironically though, the cook reminds Zoro of her, which is why he was drawn to the blonde chef in the first place. Strange how life works.
There's now a shinai stabbing his stomach and he can't blame the girl for being short with him. Not that he can help it.
She gives him a glare and tells him to take a fucking break, but no. Of course he can't since how his adoptive older sister is in the area.
"Where is my uncute baby brother?" Perona asks, shrill and demanding and Zoro drags himself in her direction because havoc will be spread if she has to make her way to him.
When she sees him, she prances over, gothic apparel dark as ever and worry in her eyes. She embraces him in a hug and Zoro will deny to his dying day that he melted under her comfort.
Just like that their tender sibling moment is over and Perona is poking him in the head, calling him an idiot and every other name under the sun.
He hates that her way of cheering him up is working.
The crew is just as insufferable. Sanji has been missing for a few days now the only person he'll talk to is Nami. Even then the conversations are short, surprising, but insight to just how serious it is.
Zoro won't apologize for his sexuality, or for liking the cook, who greatly deserved affection but he can't help feeling that the whole situation is his fualt-- which it is.
Luffy pouts constantly and Usopp turns to say something, only to realize that Sanji isn't there.
Even Nami and Robin seem out of it and its starting to grate on his nerves. Ignoring him was fine, but this was starting to affect their nakama.
He stands outside Sanji's door, asking himself why the hell he's here.
He knows why, but doesn't know why.
He has no clue what is going to happen and frankly he's terrified. Even Luffy's signature grin doesn't help.
But he's here and he has nowhere else to go.
Zoro knocks on the door and like magic it opens, revealing Sanji on the other side. The blonde's hair is disheveled and there are bags under his blue eyes and maybe Zoro shouldn't be so giddy over the though that the cook was losing sleep over him.
Sanji.
Sleep.
Sleeping.
Sanji was sleeping.
And holy fucking shit the blonde decided to answer the door without a fucking shirt on what the hell. Now Zoro's growling like some rabid animal and he has no fucking idea where to put his eyes why, holy shit why are Sanji's pants so low and what 19 year old has the fucking gall to somehow gain a V-line that prominent.
Up. Zoro thinks. Up. Like that fucking movie with the balloons because honestly he feels like he's floating right now. He looks up. Up, because there's nothing tantalizing in that direction.
How could he forget that Sanji has a face.
Stupid. Stupidly attractive face that he's only seen one half of, damn it and shouldn't be this enamored with it. But the eye. The eye. Why would an eye be so fucking blue? Huh? Who thought of that shit?
Its not fair. Its not fair at all. Especially when they fight and Zoro can see right through that dumb blonde curtain of hair into his eyes. Plural.
And suddenly Zoro thinks he understands why Sanji keeps one side hidden. Those eyes are a deep, deep blue, and endless pit that could flood the world and drown everyone in it.
But the swordsman has always been an exceptionally strong swimmer.
His body moves without consent, and really it should stop doing that because now there's plump lips pressed against his own and--
There's lips pressed against his own. There's his hands on warm hips slowly caressing creamy skin and there's the scent of tobacco and its spicy. There's so much. There's too much.
Zoro is kissing Sanji. Zoro initiated a kiss with Sanji. Zoro is fucking putty and low hum thats really a hushed moan slips past his mouth before he can restrain it.
Sanji kicks the shit out of Zoro. So hard it knocks the air out of his chest.
Sanji eyes are wide and furious. His brows are furrowed and mouth tilted in a frustrated line.
Zoro is no coward. Zoro is not afraid.
Zoro runs. He runs fast, as fast as his legs will take him because he's not ready to hear it yet. Not at all.
All the girls he's turned down and yet he can't face the one thing he's done over and over again.
Zoro runs.
Sanji follows.