Work Text:
Tommy sat at the edge of his tent, staring blankly out into the ocean. He’s been in exile for weeks now, after being thrown out by his own best friend. Tubbo. His heart stopped for a second as he thought of him, he wondered what he was doing right now. Probably messing around with Fundy and Quackity, pulling some kind of shenanigans to make each other laugh. He missed them. He missed his home.
Tommy shoved his hand down his raggedy pants pocket and pulled out his compass, engraved with the words ‘Your Tubbo’ on it. His heart ached. It was pointed directly North, towards L’manburg. Towards his friends. Towards Tubbo. Tears began to prick his eyes as his mind flooded with the thoughts of his friends living their normal lives without him there. They were probably happy. Happy that Tommy wasn’t there. Happy. Not having a care in the world, and a roof over their heads.
Meanwhile, he was stuck on this fucking island alone. His clothes were tattered and soiled with dirt, his feet constantly ached from walking on rough terrains with no shoes, which left him with countless calluses on the bottom of his feet. His hair was overgrown and shaggy, constantly reeking of musk. The only shelter he had was his tent to protect him from the rain. And it’s not like it kept him warm, it was freezing at night, and all Tommy had were scratchy thin pieces of cloth Dream had given him to keep himself from freezing.
Dream was the only one who provided him with things.
Sadness quickly changed to resentment, Tommy realizing that he was left all alone. None of his other friends there could give a shit about how he was doing. Tubbo was the one who casted him out of L’manburg himself, he didn’t care about him. Hell, if he were the president, he would have never exiled Tubbo in the first place. It was supposed to be them against the world, but it was all thrown out the window. And he was left, abandoned.
No one ever bothered to visit him either. It’s been weeks and the only people he’s ever seen were Dream and Ranboo.
The only true person Tommy had left was Dream, sure he was the one who escorted him out of the country, But he always visited Tommy. And it was never out of pity like Ranboo does. Dream was the only one he could count on, he always came with food and always cheered him up when he was feeling upset. Everyone else in L’manburg wouldn’t bat an eye if he just disappeared off the face of the earth.
They wouldn’t care.
Tommy let out a shuddery breath and shakily pocketed his compass as he stood up. He’s had enough of this. Of living in exile. Of waking up each day almost drowning himself in the ocean. He was abandoned by his supposed to be friends, and now they could care less about him. He’s dragged this out for longer than he needed to, all of his hope was diminished, and he had nothing to live for anymore.
He started to make his way to the Nether portal, hastily and with purpose. The purple light overcoming his vision and transporting him into the Nether. The harsh and unforgiving cold temperature outside suddenly changed to one that was hot and incredibly humid. Tommy stumbled a bit out of the portal, but his pace remained the same. He made his way down the obsidian path that he crafted to make visiting him easier, as if someone were to actually use it. He scoffed a bit at himself and continued walking down the path.
He finally stopped midway and looked out at the landscape before him. His eyes stared down at the lava below him with no emotion. The moulten lava lapped over itself in waves, consistenly rising and falling without fail. It was welcoming in a way. He felt as if the vibrant orange glow had been reaching out to himself, wanting to embrace him.
Tommy’s legs began to shake as he continued to stare down, tears threatening to leak from his eyes. He could end it all right now. He could end the aching in his heart from being separated by his friends and family, he could end the constant pain his body was in from being malnourshied. All he had to do was jump. And it would all come to an end.
He let out a shaky laugh to himself, finally coming to peace with his options. Tommy reached for his compass one last time, examining the engraving once again. He opened the compass and glanced at the needle, it was flicking around wildly. Showing that Tubbo was moving suddenly.
That was strange.
The compass never did that, no matter how many times he took it into the Nether with him. Sudden echos came to the left of the community Nether portal as a few footsteps followed soon after. Tommy creaked his head over, heart pounding as his eyes made contact with a short brown haired boy who stood in front of the portal.
Tubbo.
Tommy stood in disbelief, there was no possible way this was real. He has to be hallucinating after the countless days of no sleep. He faltered back a bit, as Tubbo continued to stare down at what seemed to be a compass in his hand. Tubbo continued to make his way down the obsidian pathway, finally looking up and making eye contact with Tommy. Both of their worlds seemed to stop as their eyes widened at each other.
Tubbo stopped walking and took notice to how disheveled his best friend looked, his former bright blue eyes now a dull grey, having lost its color. Tommy’s clothes were tattered and sloppily stitched together to keep it somewhat intact, his own face having almost no color but the heavy eyebags under his eyes and grime smeared on his cheeks. He seemed so weak, visibly shaking before him and looking incredibly thin. When was the last time he ate? Or had a good nights sleep? A wave of guilt rushed over Tubbo, this was his fault. It was his fault that Tommy looked like this.
“..Tubbo?” Tommy spoke, so softly that Tubbo almost couldn’t hear him over the lava bubbling below them. Almost as if he spoke too loud that Tubbo would disappear. He sounded as if he could break in any second. This wasn’t the Tommy that Tubbo knew. The Tommy he knew never knew how to be quiet and was always screaming. He was someone who never failed to challenge someone without question. It’s almost as if this person was stripped away from him. What happened?
“Am I seeing shit?” Tommy spoke shakily, his voice twisting with both anger and doubt. He was so tired of this, of his mind playing tricks on him and haunting him with images of his best friend. His grip on his compass tightened as he looked back down at the lava. But now, he wouldn’t have to worry about them anymore.
Tubbo gasped, finally putting together the pieces of why Tommy was staring down into the lava below them. He was just planning on visiting Tommy, after not being able to manage up the courage for weeks. He never expected that his best friend would be in this state, that he would seem so broken.
Tommy finally reached his foot over the edge of the platform he was standing on, a soft smile on his face as he closed his eyes. It’ll all be over now. And he wouldn’t have to worry about Tubbo or any of the people who left him in L’manburg. Suddenly loud foodsteps appeared to the side of him as he felt himself be tackled to the floor. His head slammed on the ground, knocking the air out of him as he wheezed and gasped for breath.
His eyes flew open with rage as he looked down at what stopped him from walking off the ledge.
Tubbo laid ontop of him, his arms wrapped around his waist tightly, not wanting to let go. “Tommy please! Wha.. What are you doing!” his voice quavering in fear. Tubbo’s blue eyes were filled to the brim with tears. “Please Tommy, I- I’m so sorry.. So sorry for everything, for exiling you, for not visiting you until now. But this isn’t the way to fix your problems.. Please..” He pleaded desperately.
Tommy clenched his jaw, visibly enraged. Of course Tubbo was here now out of all times. “You finally come to visit me when I choose to do this?!” He let out a dark and unsettling laugh. “Fuck you!” Tommy spat out.
Tommy sat up and tried to push Tubbo off of him with all of his strength, his arms shaking terribly. Tubbo’s grip remained just as tight as ever, not daring to let go. Tommy grunted as he continued to attempt to push him off, he was incredibly weak. He’d only been eating scraps for the past weeks, which was just enough to keep him alive.
“Fuck you!” He repeated. “You don’t care about me! No one in L’manburg does either! None of you ever came to visit me! I could die right now and they wouldn’t care!” Tommy shouted, voice cracking. His eyes began to fill with tears, while he could only hit Tubbo’s back with his fists.
“Just let me die-!” Tommy sobbed out. His throat felt tight as his breath shuddered mid-sentence. This was so unfair. He just wanted the pain to end. To stop this suffering. Why was it being denied from him? ”Just let me die.. Please..” His voice softened as tears fell uncontrollably from his eyes. Tommy fell back, arms dropping to his sides as he lost his will to fight.
The two boys laid there for a while, only listening to the soft shaky breaths both of them were taking.
“I’m so sorry Tommy. I am so goddamn sorry..” Tubbo eventually choked out, tears rolling down his cheeks. “I was a terrible friend, I should have realized that Dream was trying to tear us apart.. And I didn’t.” He looked up at Tommy, who was blankly staring up at the Nether roof with tears streaming down his face.
“...Come home?” Tubbo asked gently, his voice seeming so small. “Please?”
Tommy laid there with no reaction to Tubbo’s plea for a few moments.
Come home? After the weeks of being stuck on an island with nothing but himself. Come home. To L’manburg. To all his friends and family. To having a roof over his head and not having to worry if he would survive the night. But Dream.. What would Dream think? He wouldn’t be pleased if he saw that he just returned back to where he was supposed to be exiled from. But-
“Do… Do you mean it Tubbo?” Tommy croaked out quietly. Looking down to make eye contact with him, pain sprawled across his face. “Could I really- Could I really come home..?” A small quiver hope swam through his words.
“Of course I do Tommy!” Tubbo jumped to respond, still laying ontop of Tommy. “I’ve missed you so much.. Please.. Please come home with me.” The corners of his eyes becoming blurry once again.
Tommy sat up a bit, Tubbo shifted to hold his hands rather than his waist. The two stared at each other, a mixture of hope and pain on their faces. Tommy squeezed Tubbo’s hands gently, shakily looking at his best friend.
“I.. I’d like that Tubbo..” Tommy spoke softly, tears beginning to well up in his eyes again.
“I’d like that very much.”