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The last time I saw you, back when I was a person, back when I went by 'Klaus', I was already very old.
Despite years having passed by us both, you were still the same as always- you would come by my place after your shift was done, sometimes in the company of your wife, Alva, and then we would all talk about our day over a cup of something hot.
Tea was your usual go-to, but when something particularly good happened, you'd have cocoa and talk animatedly about it with bright eyes and gestures.
Last time we met, that seemed to be the case.
Back when I was alive, I learned how expressive and exaggerated you were- me and Alva would cackle about how good an actor you would have been had you decided to pursue a different career, and I can remember you replying you really didn't care much about being an actor.
Well, in your words: You didn't care much about anything before coming to Smeerensburg.
Back then, I was glad you changed your mind.
So yes, you might've done us dirty at first, but somehow along the way, we all got something good out of it: Years of hatred and fights were over the moment you let children play together with their toys, Alva became the teacher she wanted to be because you made the children want to learn how to write, and I…
I found the family I always dreamed of having.
Your act of kindness sparked several many, and Smeerensburg changed forever, for the best.
Back then, I was at peace with the way things turned out to be.
So, when Lydia called out for me, right after you left my house with a bright smile on your face… I knew my time was up.
I followed her call, and with each step I took, I recalled the wonderful last years of my life- the years you brought me with your crazy schemes and dramatic gestures and long talks about this and that.
I remembered the last time I saw you: You were smiling up at me with a cup of hot cocoa in your hands, telling me about Ava's pregnancy with bright eyes.
With that last memory, I took a deep breath.
And when I let it out, I left, for good.
...Or so I thought.
The last time I saw you, after I was reborn as a Guardian, and became 'North', you were very old.
Despite years having passed by us both, I remained the same as I was when you met me for the first time, while you aged like any human- I would come to your place every Christmas' Eve, and we would talk for hours, catching up on everything that had happened that year, over a plate of cookies and hot cocoa.
You would always greet me by yourself, but I wouldn’t mind, since you made sure to fill me in on how Alva and your children were doing.
You didn’t need to do it, I basically know everything about any child on Earth, if only to know how they behaved until Christmas… but, hearing it from you it’s much more interesting, because you sound so happy, and so proud- and how could you not be? Your children are pristine examples to follow, if the gifts I bring them are anything to go by.
We would joke about that, about me having ‘favorites’- well, now, I don’t have favorites… but, I’ll admit that I wanted to spoil them.
After all, they were part of my family, too.
Last time I saw you, your children had children, and they had children as well- one of them looked a lot like you, and I remember I had to make a double take when I saw him the first time.
He didn’t see me, of course. He was old enough to stop believing in Santa. And he would tease you about still believing in ‘the man in red that goes down the chimneys’ at your age.
Because by then, you were… old. Very old.
Last time I saw you… I knew it was going to be my last visit.
The realization hurt, and I dare think it was the first thing that hurt me deeply ever since I became a Guardian.
I remember it so clearly, my friend. It was a long night, but I arrived at your house- you never dared to move out, because it meant so much to you, like my old house did to me- and I slid down the chimney, which was still a little warm even after the embers were put out.
When I came into your house, I was greeted with the familiar sight of you, sitting in your armchair, a tray of cookies and two mugs of cocoa in front of you.
Familiar, but also new, because I looked at you, and you were so different. Your blonde hair was gone, replaced by light grey, and most of it was gone, too. Your skin was pale, barely any rose tainting it…
I don’t want to think about it… because it made everything seem more real at that moment.
I remember reaching out for you- you had fallen asleep, and when you woke up, you smiled up at me.
“Klaus...”
Your voice was enough to calm me down.
I took a seat, and as always, we talked. I told you about the places I saw, you told me about your grandchildren and other relatives. At that moment, everything felt familiar to me, and I was happy to talk with you again, and fill in the blanks of your narrations.
You were so old, but your threatrics were intact, even if you couldn’t gesture as wildly as you used to.
It was so abrupt when I felt my time was up. I had to return to the North Pole.
And you knew, too.
“It’s getting late, my friend… you wouldn’t like to put those poor Reindeers through some big flight while they’re tired, would you?” You wheezed a small laugh, and it made me smile.
I remember shaking my head and chuckled. “Yeah, doubt your Prancer will like that.” He was your favorite Reindeer, I recall.
But I stood still, looking at you, and once more, you caught up.
“You are worried about me.” You pointed out, calmly.
I sighed and nodded, sitting back down and placing my hand carefully on your back. “My friend… I might not see you again.” I told you, quietly, because I suddenly couldn’t speak louder.
I have seen so many generations of children come and go in my life as North… but I always suspected it wouldn’t prepare me for when your time came as well.
“Hey… don’t think that way.” You said, resting your hands on your abdomen with a slight smile… you seemed so calm about it. “Who knows… maybe I’ll see you again, somehow.”
I looked up at you, but I couldn’t find any words, so you continued: “I thought the same thing when you left, the first time… and yet, you came back. And you kept returning. You made me so happy… wouldn’t be fair if I didn’t do the same for you, y’know what I mean?”
“Jesper...”
You smiled a little more, your eyes were getting wet. “Even if I can’t… I don’t regret anything. My life was perfect, thanks to you, and our family. The experiences I went through with all of you are so precious to me, and I’m grateful we were able to share it… after all, that’s the spirit of the Christmas we made... isn’t it?”
Before I knew it, I was hugging you. I was so scared. I couldn’t hide it.
Because Christmas was something we made, and knowing that you wouldn’t get to experience it again… it made me heavy with grief.
But you were there, consoling me, telling me that it would be OK. That our Christmas always brought the best out of people, even those who suffered.
You assured me that I will be OK.
And I assured you, before I left, that I will keep our Christmas as we made it- an act of kindness that would spark another, all over the world.
I drove the sleigh through the night skies, watching your house until it’s light vanished from my sight.
That’s when I knew this would be the last time I saw you.
...Or so I thought.
The last time I saw you, contrary to what I had believed all along, wasn’t over two hundred years ago.
In fact… It was barely a couple minutes ago. Here, in the Workshop I would tell you about during my visits at your house.
As usual, I was sculpting from a chunk of ice, brainstorming about a new toy model for the upcoming holidays. Nothing that came to me was good enough, and I was considering taking a break.
And, as if reading my thoughts, someone knocked at the door. I thought it was one of the Yetis and it lifted my mood a bit- despite my constant reminders, they kept forgetting to knock before coming in. So, this was a step forward.
“It’s unlocked, come on in.” I said, turning around in my chair to face the door, wondering what this could be about and mentally preparing myself for it.
...Then again, nothing would have prepared me for what I saw once the door opened up.
It was... you.
Jesper, it was you.
Looking young like back then when we first met. Looking so, so familiar, yet different.
Because I could tell, before you could say anything, that you were now a being like me. A being with a pristine white messenger uniform, complete with a winged hat and a cape that also resembled wings. All adorned with bright golden buttons.
But brighter was your smile, when you held a letter up to me, and said:
“Good evening! I have a delivery for Mr. North.”
And although confused, something in me just knew what this meant.
This wouldn’t be the last time I saw you.
THE END.