Chapter Text
It was a rainy early February afternoon in Avengers Tower, and Steve and Bucky were enjoying the peace and quiet on their floor. The sound of the rain against the window was calming for both of them, and they were high enough not to hear the background din of traffic and people below. Bucky was stretched out on the sofa with a book in one hand, the other resting on Steve’s chest, where he was sitting on the floor, sketching Alpine on his tablet.
Bucky couldn’t remember being so content. He was warm, not exhausted for once, had a full belly, no pain, and he was completely in his own mind. He occasionally had to pinch himself to convince himself it wasn’t some elaborate dream. Alpine was comfortable and warm on his lap, sleeping peacefully. His book was mildly interesting, enough to keep him reading it, but not enough to consume him.
He could feel Steve breathing under his arm, regular, even and deep. It was reassuring not to hear a wheeze when he breathed, not to feel his skin burning a fever against his. He could remember the fear that came every time Steve got poorly; it was never something he got used to. No matter how many times Steve got better again, beat the odds and survived to another birthday, Bucky was always so scared for him. He dreaded the moment Steve’s cough turned brittle and wet-sounding or when he got even a hint of a fever. This sort of weather would have made Steve sick before. Cold and wet, the perfect combination for pneumonia.
His wandering mind fully distracted him from his book. He put the bookmark in place and let it fall flat on his chest, tilting his head to look down at Steve. He was so much bigger than before. Bucky didn’t really appreciate anything other than ‘bigger’ when he first saw him in Azzano. Then, when he had the chance, in their private tent, he spent a good few hours just looking and touching Steve, appreciating all that he had become. Unfortunately, Zola had already been frying his brain by then, and it was in the middle of a war, so he’d not really understood all the benefits.
It wasn’t until he had been free of Hydra for a year that it truly clicked. Steve was healthy. And huge.
He was still remembering at that point; the true level of their relationship hadn’t been clear to him until he’d stalked up to Steve during a sparring match and kissed him hard. It hadn’t progressed anywhere that day, but later that night, he dreamed of their true first kiss.
It was the summer of 1934. He’d been 17, Steve had just turned 16. Bucky had taken him to the roof for a picnic, high above the polluted air and away from people who might have been carrying Lord knew what germs. Steve had been sweet all day, letting Bucky give him gifts even though he normally hated the other man wasting his money. Not that Bucky ever listened to his little firecracker, if he wanted to spoil his best guy with his last dime, then that was his right.
They’d been watching the sunset when Steve got his attention, sitting right up close beside him to fight off the evening chill. The blonde idiot had cupped his cheek and ever so softly touched their lips together. Bucky had been so stunned he didn’t move right away, just flushed all the way to his hairline when Steve pulled back. By the look on Steve’s face, though, Bucky had just ruined what had otherwise been an amazing day.
So, he’d just smiled, shaken his head slightly and cupped the back of Steve’s head. It had been the perfect size back then. “We never do this in public,” he instructed seriously, before he leaned in to kiss him again, with more involvement on his part the second time around. It didn’t lead anywhere else, at the time, but they kissed until it got dark, and Steve began to shiver.
Then they continued to kiss some more in the apartment that Bucky had surprised him with. It was a memory Bucky cherished above others, partly because he recovered it all on his own, but also because it was such a sweet and tender moment between them, and he could enjoy it whenever he chose, played like a movie in his mind.
Back in the present, Bucky had begun gently stroking his fingers over Steve’s arm, absently playing with the hairs and marvelling at the technology Tony had created with Shuri. He could feel so much more now, could feel how each hair moved under the pads of his fingers. He could feel pressure whenever Steve held his hand, could feel heat and cold, could feel how soft Alpine’s fur was, could feel the roughness of her tongue when she licked butter off them. For all his brain knew, this was his arm.
But right now, he was focusing on the goosebumps he’d stimulated into existence on Steve’s arm. He could see the man shiver and pause his sketching, tilting his head slightly towards Bucky. “Book get boring?” he asked, and Bucky could hear the smile in his voice. He picked up the sketching again, but was still paying attention to him if the tilt of his head was anything to go by.
“No… just got distracted, I guess….” He drawled, brushing all the hairs he could reach in the wrong direction, just because he could.
“Distracted hm?” Steve asked coyly. “That what you’re calling horny these days?” he joked, looking up at Bucky over his shoulder, his eyes sparkling with mirth. And gosh, his eyelashes were so long.
He rolled his eyes and huffed slightly, gently slapping Steve’s arm in admonishment. “Not horny, punk. I was just thinkin’… ‘bout us, from before…” he trailed off a little, feeling Steve grow tense under his arm. Sometimes he got anxious when Bucky started talking about their life pre-war, he’d got it wrong before, things that hadn’t been memories but fantasies he thought were real. It often upset Steve, no matter how much the blonde tried to hide it.
“You’d have gotten sick in this weather, back then…” He recalled for Steve, “Either ‘flu or pneumonia, something that would have knocked you right out for at least a week. Made me think about when you were healthy… I realised that I never fully appreciated it when you were well, I was so focused on trying to keep you that way or preparing for the next time you got sick…” he moved his hand up to cup Steve’s jaw, rubbing a thumb against his stubble. “I never appreciated you the way you should have been, appreciated the size difference between us…” he grinned softly.
Bucky watched with delight as Steve’s cheeks grew pink. The other man put the tablet down and turned enough to rest his arms on the edge of the sofa, giving Bucky his full attention. “You were the only person I would ever allow to pick me up.” He reminded him, his flush darkening. That drew Bucky’s attention; he couldn’t really remember picking Steve up much, maybe once when he was sick and had collapsed in the bathroom? But other than that, he didn’t recall.
“Don’t go getting shy on me, doll, when did I pick you up?” he asked. There was a brief moment when he saw guilt and pain in Steve’s blue eyes, the blonde remembering that Bucky was still not fully back to who he was. He was able to brush it off fairly quickly, it seemed, as he took Bucky’s hand in his own, his fingers tracing the lines of the plates absently.
“Well… there were times… we would- you would- God, I literally sucked you off last night, it shouldn’t be this hard.” He chuckled self-depreciatingly, using Bucky’s arm to cool his cheeks down, turning it this way and that to get cooler metal on each cheek. Bucky left him to it for a few moments before catching his chin between his thumb and forefinger, angling Steve’s head up to focus his attention.
“Basically… because you were worried about my asthma and stuff, and because you were so much bigger than me, we only ever had sex with me on top… sometimes we had it with you just lifting me. Especially after you started working at the docks, got all buff…” He hadn’t met Bucky’s eyes once while talking, the glistening blue a mix of shy and wistful. Bucky found himself grinning uncontrollably, loving how he could go from being confident and teasing Bucky for over an hour, to this bashful man who blushed at the mention of sex.
“So, I used to just… lift you and let gravity do the work?” he asked, his eyebrow raising. “The only one who you’d let lift you… Which means you enjoyed it.” He concluded, using his finger on Steve’s chin to draw him in closer. “You realise I could still do that now, right?” he pointed out, taking great enjoyment in the way Steve’s pupils dilated.
“Mmhmm… That’s right, Stevie. I could lift you just as easily now as I could then, wouldn’t even need the wall for support. Just your legs wrapped around my waist, my cock against your hole, just letting you slowly sit on it…” He lowered his voice, making it huskier for Steve and running his thumb across his lower lip.
“Is that what you want, Stevie? You wanna be manhandled? I can do that for you, if you ask nicely…” he whispered, touching their lips so lightly it couldn’t really be considered a kiss. “One little word is all it takes.”
“Please…” Steve breathed; Bucky felt the movement more than heard it. Grinning, he sat up and gently lifted a disgruntled Alpine from his lap, standing and helping Steve up in the process. He pulled him towards the bedroom by his hand, closing the door after them, so Alpine wouldn’t follow them in and be creepily watching. He then pressed Steve against said door, crowding him and kissing each cheek ever so gently.
This close to him, Bucky could hear how heavily Steve was breathing, could feel him hard in his sweatpants. Could practically hear his heart beating as well; it was enough to tell Bucky he was doing a good job. He went back to kissing him just nice and easy and slow, easing Steve into something a little more comfortable. He tugged on his shirt until Steve got the message and moved enough for the other to remove it, shortly followed by his own. Then he pushed at the sweatpants until they fell to the floor, and Steve kicked them to one side.
Now he was naked, Bucky was able to touch and tease as he liked, making Steve feel good in all the ways he knew how. Once Steve was finally begging for more, Bucky lifted one of his legs and hooked it over his hip, then, with ease, lifted the other as well and secured his hands under Steve’s ass, rolling their hips together. He began to carry them to the bed, ready to move to the main event. With his height and this body, Steve was much taller than Bucky in this position, something he imagined was different when he was small. He gently lay the other man down on the bed, running one hand over his chest while the other began to reach for the lube.
And then the alarm went off, calling for the Avengers.
“You gotta be fuckin’ kidding me.” Bucky groaned, pushing up off Steve and noticing his erection was already beginning to flag. He gave him a final kiss before patting his chest and stepping away. “I’ll see you later, I’ll give you a massage when you’re back, go fight some evil.” He told him encouragingly, grinning at the expression on his face.
“One of these days it will be a job that requires everyone, you included, and then you’ll feel the frustration too,” Steve grumbled, going to the wardrobe and pressing his palm against a hidden panel in the wall to reveal his suit and shield.
“I mean, I’m feeling the same level of frustration here, Steve.” He pointed out, gesturing to the bulge he was currently sporting in his own pants. Though he was softening as the seconds dragged on.
“You can still jerk off, I gotta squash myself into the stupid protective underwear,” Steve complained, forcing his legs into the bottom half of his suit, wincing a little as he does so, fastening the buttons and buckles. He pulls on the under-shirt woven with vibranium, then the suit top, coming back over to Bucky so he could fasten it at the back.
“You know I still prefer the one with the booty shorts,” Bucky tells him, making sure the suit is secure so Steve would be fully protected. He moved his hands down to squeeze his ass, “have to admit it accentuated this very nicely…” he murmurs, jiggling the cheeks.
“I can count on one hand the things I actually would have preferred you didn’t recall. The booty shorts are one of them.” Bucky heard Steve mutter, which just resulted in a quick swat against said booty. “Kidding! I’m kidding, mostly,” Steve chuckled, turning back to him and taking his hand. “Come on, you can come to the briefing.” He said, tugging on Bucky until he stood and followed him.