Chapter Text
I will meet you there, beyond the pines
Templed in twilight or dawn
The light and easy air
Tracing the lines on our palms
- Beyond The Pines - Thrice
The romantic concept of soulmates is the thing that movies are made of. It’s what all the greatest love songs are written about. It’s the epic love stories that parents tell their children as they’re growing up, the heartwarming piece at the end of the evening news, and it’s what every teenager dreams of when they have their first, second, third and fourth crush.
Maybe they’ll be the one. Maybe, we’ll make eye contact, and I’ll remember our past life together.
But the reality of soulmates isn’t as beautiful or theatrical or perfect as the stories and movies and love songs make it out to be.
Sometimes, it is perfect. In those cases, it’s like something out of a cheesy romance novel - you bump into your soulmate on a busy New York street and just like that, it all comes rushing back to you. Or maybe you decide to try out a new coffee shop, and you can’t even get your order out because you’re looking into the barista’s eyes and realizing that you know them. You remember them. Or maybe, you meet as teenagers and become high school sweethearts, then spouses, then raise a happy family together in the dream home that you never could have afforded in a past life.
Those are the inspirational love stories that they tell on the news, that people share all over social media and they make sitcoms and write books about.
But not every story is that pretty.
Sometimes, it’s absolutely heartbreaking - like the emergency room surgeon who has that moment of realization just as they’re about to attempt a life-saving surgery on a patient they’ve never met, or the first responder who feels their heart shatter when they lay eyes on the car crash victim that looks just too familiar.
It can be bittersweet, too. Sometimes, it happens far too young, when two bright-eyed children meet in grade school and end up in therapy, trying to understand what the weight of their memories means and coping with the pain and trauma that comes along with them. Sometimes, it’s two people finding each other later on in life, long after their golden years are behind them, but still very much in love. Sometimes, it’s falling in love with someone who isn’t your soulmate, then meeting that one special someone, and loving them all the same.
Sometimes, those memories of a past life are good, but sometimes, they’re painful. After all, a relationship has to end somehow…
And sometimes, you make it twenty-five years before your soulmate finally shows up, and then when they finally do, you don’t understand it at all.
Or maybe that’s just Levi.
At twenty-five years old, Levi would be lying if he said he wasn’t content with the life he built for himself, soulmate or not. He and his childhood best friend, Hange Zoe, get the fuck out of their tiny hometown the second that they graduate high school - Hange attending one of Colorado’s most prestegious colleges and Levi pursuing his dream to eventually open his own tattoo shop. They make an odd pair, but the brainy, high energy and easily excitable Hange perfectly balances Levi’s more standoffish, prickly and solitary personality in a way that makes most strangers think that they’re soulmates, which never fails to crack Hange up any time someone makes the suggestion. While they’re certainly not soulmates, Hange is the only person that Levi can be around for extended periods of time without wanting to assault them, and that’s saying a lot.
By the time they’re in their mid twenties, they’re both doing fairly well for themselves. Only a few short years after leaving their hometown behind, Levi finds himself tattooing full-time and Hange has landed an internship at a lab nearby, and it really feels like they’re finally getting their shit together, soulmates or not. After all, one doesn’t need true love to feel fulfilled or happy.
In fact, if he’s being honest, Levi has always found the idea of soulmates incredibly cheesy. He’s never been the type to believe in fate, and the idea that there’s someone out there that he’s supposed to end up with, already predetermined by a past life and a whole lot of fate is frankly stupid as fuck. Sure, he makes quite a bit of money off of soulmate-related tattoos, but he honestly couldn’t care less care if he never found his own. Hell, he wouldn’t mind if he didn’t have one. He doesn’t like the idea that a major component of his life has already been decided for him, even if it was by his own choosing in a previous life.
Hange, for the most part, seems to share that sentiment. They’ve had countless conversations about it over the years, and generally, Hange agrees that a soulmate just seems like too much work, especially with their lofty goals and aspirations for the future.
But just five years out of high school, with their whole lives ahead of them, everything changes - and not just for Hange, but for both of them.
Hange finds their soulmate shortly after turning twenty-three, and it’s not like the movies or romance novels or love songs that they’ve heard their entire lives, but it’s still incredible, nonetheless. Even Levi can admit that.
It’s so anticlimactic when it happens that at first, it doesn’t even dawn on Levi that Hange just found their soulmate. They’re in some shitty, overly-crowded bar downtown on a Saturday night - Hange had insisted on dragging Levi out for a night of fun - and when Levi loses Hange somewhere in the sea of moving bodies and clinking glasses, he sighs and backtracks, regretting ever agreeing to come out with them. He really doesn’t care for most bars or clubs, but downtown on the weekend has him reaching an entirely new level of hatred and impatience, and he fully plans on laying into them as soon as he spies their messy head of hair or hears their loud voice over the music.
When Levi finally does lay eyes on Hange in the dimly lit bar, he’s unsurprised to see them clinging onto someone he has never met in a bone-crushing hug. It’s not shocking - after all, it’s common knowledge that Hange is a social butterfly compared to Levi - so he simply rolls his eyes and approaches Hange and the supposed stranger.
But then, they part, and Levi catches a glimpse of Hange’s face, and -
Oh.
Hange’s lips are twisted up in a bittersweet smile, tears brimming in their eyes, hands still holding tight onto the man in front of them, and deep down, some part of Levi just knows that this is someone Hange has never met in this lifetime. He knows, because he has seen many of his clients look at their partners and soulmates the same way.
So Hange finds their soulmate at twenty-three years old in a shitty bar in downtown Denver, and when Levi thinks back on it, that’s when things really begin to change. It doesn’t change the dynamic of their friendship by any means, nor does it change Hange’s drive in regards to their career, but it certainly changes their outlook on soulmates.
And over time, it changes Levi’s, too.
That night, in the crowded bar, a teary-eyed Hange leans in to press a kiss to the stranger’s lips before Levi even manages to approach the pair.
“Levi, this is Moblit,” Hange says once they’ve found their way out of the crowd and into a quieter, more secluded booth at a less popular dive bar less than twenty minutes later. “He’s -” their voice catches, and holy shit Levi has never seen them like this - at a loss for words.
“I’m their soulmate,” the stranger - Moblit - supplies with a warm smile and an extended arm. “It’s good to see you, Levi.”
He says it with such warmth, such familiarity, that Levi almost feels like he’s met him before. Levi almost makes a snarky comment about it (“Am I supposed to know who you are?”) but before he can get the words out, Hange is gasping, practically lurching forward across the table to grab a handful of Levi’s hoodie and wrenching him forward. He has to brace himself on the table to stop them from pulling him out of his seat completely or causing him to faceplant on the sticky surface.
“Hange, what the fuck?” he bites, attempting to pry their hands off of his clothes, but they don’t budge. Instead, they just fix him with a manic grin and exclaim -
“Holy shit, Levi - we knew each other in our past life!”
And that - that’s when everything begins to change for Levi.
Two hours later, long after last call, Hange is hugging (and kissing) Moblit goodbye for now, with his phone number saved and a promise to get dinner the following night. And only about half an hour after that, it’s well past two in the morning and Levi finds himself sitting next to Hange on the sofa, nursing a beer and listening to them excitedly recount stories from a past life, attempting to wrap his head around it and make sense of it all. When Hange gets excited about something, their train of thought can become incredibly hard to follow, and this is obviously no exception. From what he has gathered from their rambling, though, Hange was part of some sort of military branch alongside Moblit and Levi, but the purpose of said branch isn’t entirely clear. In fact, not much of it makes sense to Levi other than the fact that they had been torn apart tragically all too soon.
So long after two in the morning as they sit together in their shared apartment, it’s the least that Levi can do to let Hange ramble on and on about their past life, and as the night goes on, he lets his curiosity get the best of him. He’s never been the sentimental type and he has never really believed in soulmates, but seeing Hange’s reaction to finding Moblit… well, it might have been anticlimactic, but it’s the kind of shit that they write movies about. It’s the kind of shit that makes all of those sappy tattoos and love stories make sense.
It’s the kind of shit that makes Levi wonder if he has a soulmate from this past life, too. And maybe, if he cared for them as much as Hange appears to care about Moblit, maybe it wouldn't be so damn bad.
So, as it nears three in the morning, Levi can’t help but ask, “So… In this past life, did I - I mean, was I -”
Hange’s grin is something that would terrify most people, but it doesn’t surprise Levi after years of friendship, even now. “Are you trying to ask if you were with someone?” They ask, a teasing tone in their voice.
Levi bristles. “Well, no. I mean, maybe. I don’t know -”
“Holy shit, you actually care,” Hange interrupts, “And here I thought you were this heartless, tough as nails -”
“Well no shit,” Levi bites in response. “I mean if I’m destined to spend the rest of my life with someone, it would be nice to know that they’re not an asshole.”
Hange barks out a laugh at Levi’s very… Levi response. “I mean, I guess that’s fair.”
But they don’t say anything right away, which has Levi leaning in just a little bit, annoyed and curious and just a little bit embarrassed. “So…”
Hange clears their throat, then lifts their beer to their lips to take a swig. “Well, it’s uh - it’s complicated.”
Levi fixes them with a flat stare, repeating, “Complicated.”
It isn’t a question, but Hange gets the point. With a nervous chuckle, they ask, “You have time for a story?”
And Levi extends his arms as if to ask “What the fuck else am I doing?”
Nearly an hour and another couple of drinks later, Levi is still sitting next to Hange on the sofa, eyebrows raised when he mutters, deadpan, “Giant, naked monsters.”
“Giant, naked monsters who eat people,” Hange repeats with near childlike glee, and Levi finds himself thinking that if Hange is this insane in this life, they must have been unbearable before. “But I mean, they didn’t have genitals, which was kind of nice. Although, it was really puzzling and -”
“Jesus fucking christ,” Levi mutters, cutting them off before they can go off on another tangent. He pinches the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger. “I honestly can’t tell if you’re trolling me right now or -”
“I’m not,” Hange insists earnestly, “I swear.”
“So where does the whole soulmate thing come in then?” Levi asks in an attempt to stop Hange’s rambling again.
“Well, like I said, Moblit was part of my… squad. He served under me, actually,” they say with a laugh. Their voice sounds far away, happy, despite the bleak content of their memories.
“No, I mean -”
“Oh. Oh, for you,” Hange quickly understands what Levi means, but their voice sounds suspiciously less excited, a little more cautious. “That’s uh - that’s the complicated part, I guess. I mean, you were… well, like you are now.”
Levi raises his eyebrows, daring Hange to say something stupid.
“A standoffish asshole,” Hange supplies with a grin. Levi would argue that he’s a private person, not an asshole, but Hange has heard it a million times, so with an eye roll, he just lets them continue. “So I mean… I could think of someone, but even if I would have asked you if you two were together back then, you would have just told me to go fuck myself.”
Levi huffs out a laugh. Good to know that some things never change.
“Can’t you just tell me their name?” he asks.
“I -” Hange starts, their mouth opening then closing. They chose their next words carefully. “I think it’s best that I don’t theorize here, Levi. If it’s meant to be, it’ll be.”
Levi rolls his eyes, “Did you annoy me as much back then as you do now, too?”
And that comment has Hange leaning back, barking out another loud laugh.
Two years pass after Hange finds their soulmate. Two years of Hange and Moblit together, of stories from a past life and Levi wishing, for the very first time, that he could remember it, too.
Hange sticks to their word for two whole years. Despite Levi’s pestering at first, they don’t budge. He even tries Moblit shortly after he moves in, but his lips are sealed as well. They don’t theorize or speculate on Levi’s soulmate, and while Levi wants to fight them over it, he gets it. Begrudgingly, he understands.
So for two whole years, he watches Hange’s blossoming romance with their soulmate, and he can’t help but wonder if he’ll ever find his own. It’s something he has never really given much thought to, but over the course of those two years, he finds himself thinking about it more and more.
If he does have a soulmate - if they’re the person that Hange thinks they are - he wonders what they’re like. What do they look like? What was their relationship like? Did Levi lose them too young, as Hange did with Moblit, or was it the other way around? Or did they make it out of that war alive and live a happy life together?
For two years, those questions go unanswered, until a tall, blonde man walks through the front door of his tattoo shop early one evening and turns his entire world upside down.
At twenty-five, Levi finally has everything he has ever wanted in his career. He has been running his own tattoo shop for over a year - a modest, clean space in the heart of downtown Denver, sandwiched between a stylish little cafe and a dive bar - and he has a strong team of artists and piercers behind him. The shop isn’t massive by any means, but what it lacks in size, it makes up for in artistry. While Levi specializes in stunning, vibrant colors and beautiful floral work, he comprises his team of artists to fill in the gaps - one who does fantastic portrait work, one of the best geometric artists in the city and an apprentice who is shaping up to be an incredible traditional artist - making it no surprise that they’re generally booked out for months.
While some of the other artists, particularly his apprentice, accept walk-in’s whenever they have a gap in their schedule, Levi strictly only tattoos by appointment only. It helps to weed out the idiots, he insists, as most people who book with him have to wait months just for a consultation, let alone the tattoo itself.
That’s what his last appointment of the day is today. A quick, thirty minute consultation before he’s off for the next two days. It shouldn’t take too long - the note alongside the appointment said something about a mountain scene, which is generally pretty straightforward - so Levi is already cleaning up his station by 6 PM when the front door chimes.
Ymir, one of Levi’s piercers, is at the front desk when the client walks in, so he doesn’t even bother lifting his head. Instead, he just continues sanitizing his station.
It takes less than a minute before Ymir is yelling his name, though - “Levi, your six o’clock is here!” - and he’s finally glancing up.
The client is a tall, well put-together looking man. His blonde hair is parted neatly and stylishly to the side, complimenting the dark button-up and tie he wears well, but that’s not the first thing that Levi notices about him. No, although the well dressed man does look relatively out of place in a tattoo shop, that’s not what stands out about him. Instead, even from across the room, the first thing that Levi notices are his piercing blue eyes.
That, and Levi can’t shake the sense of familiarity about him, like they’ve met before. Maybe he’s been to the shop before - that wouldn’t be surprising. Or maybe they went to school together, or he could be a friend of Hange’s...
He doesn’t have much time to think about that, though, before he’s standing and crossing the room. At the very least, he appears approachable and kind, greeting Levi with a warm smile and an outstretched hand.
“Hey,” Levi greets him, taking his hand, “You must be -”
He doesn’t get to finish the rest of his sentence. He can’t, because the second that he takes the stranger’s hand, time and space and reality warps around him and suddenly, he’s kneeling on the ground, dirty water staining his clothes and dripping from his hair as he stares up at those same blue eyes. Suddenly, those eyes are locked on his own, gazing up at him through torrential rain, wind whipping around them - determined and fierce. Those same blue eyes stare back at him with understanding, pain and remorse in the dim light of an office as Levi begs him don’t do this...
When Levi takes that hand now, he takes that same hand in a past life, and it’s nothing he ever expected or hoped for, but life changing, nonetheless.
They say your life flashes before your eyes when you die, but nobody ever bothered to tell Levi that the same thing happens when you remember. Sure, it’s in all of the movies and songs and epic romance novels and Hange has tried to explain it to him, albeit not very eloquently, but nothing could have prepared him for the way that his memories from a past life come flooding back all at once when he looks into those eyes. It feels like he’s been hit by a truck, like he’s been struck by lightning, like something just pulled all of the breath from his lungs.
All of that pain. That suffering. All of the fighting. And yet, there are glimpses of joy, little moments of happiness, when those crystal blue eyes catch his own from across the room, when they find Levi’s hardened gaze on the battlefield -
When they say goodbye.
Levi gasps, ripping his hand from the other man’s grasp and takes a shaky step back, his legs suddenly weak and unsteady underneath him. He feels like he could collapse, like he could laugh, like he could cry, but for a moment, he can’t do anything except stare up at that all-too familiar stranger with the blonde hair and blue eyes and an intense gaze that says -
Fight for the Survey Corps, Levi - humanity needs your strength!
And Levi knows that this is real. Deep down, in his heart, he knows that he remembers. That he isn’t having some sort of episode, that this isn’t some acquaintance that he knows through Hange or Moblit or any of his co-workers. He remembers, and as his voice finally comes back to him, he doesn’t know what to say, what to do. He just doesn’t know how he ever forgot -
“Erwin.”