Chapter Text
Haze and smoke filled the skies as sirens sounded
Screams from children erupted in the air.
This was the end wasn't it
Well god truly is one son of a bitch for letting us live.
----
“Tommy, I swear to god if you don't wear your mask I wont save your ass again!”
Tubbo ran through the rundown dennys yelling at the taller.
“You cant fucking make me do anything bitch!” tommy screamed as he jumped from the table to behind the counter
tubbo ran up to tommy before wacking him in the knees making him fall to the ground
“Augh what the fuck man! Not fucking cool tubbo.” he looked up, tubbo smirked before pulling the lanky boy to his feet. He handed him the filtering mask and smiled
“Sorry but you needed to listen to me somehow.” tommy sat over on the counter grabbing the gas mask
He looked out to the barren waste that once was a bustling city.
Tubbo chucked his gloves towards him
“Wear those, i upgraded yours as your body just CAN'T stop growing” tubbo said sarcastically.
“Tubbo and i mean this in the nicest way but your baby rage is showing.” tubbo chucked a bag at him
“At least I can duck.” he laughed.
“Ah shut up bitch you don't have to duck your short enough it will fly right over your head- OFF!” the jacket was thrown and made him topple over.
“Never call me short again you fucker.” tubbo said while walking over to hand him his weapons and list of supplies.
“Once you grow then maybe we can start talking.” he spat as he stood up.
Tubbo sighed and handed him the gun.
“Don't waste amo again, that takes a full day to make. Also if you see any sugar or eggs or anything like that bring it back.im tired of eating pop tarts and Twinkies.” tommy nodded to his friend and set off.
“Oh and one more thing!” tommy turned back to his friend
“Do NOT engage with the empire again!”
“No promises bitch boy!” and he was gone.
----
Tommy got in the old van and started driving. He knew he needed to raid the badlands today but he did not want to walk. Besides, it's not like tubbo would notice his only means of transportation went missing.
Driving in the barren city he pulled down his goggles and mask and started looking around. Once he knew he was a good 20 feet away from his targeted and any sort of civilization he parked the car. walking through a field he started running, his boots not having much pressure as tubbo made kt that way.
one advantage of having a nerd for a friend is that he can make you tone of cool gadgets and armour like boots that can run faster and have less gravity than most. he doesn't know how tubbo even does it, he's not a nerd.
He eventually got to his destination, the sandman hotel. A hotel in the middle of nowhere and known for its ominous trades with the empire and the dream team. Looking at it he saw an opening, a backdoor down a dark hallways. He knew somebody would be in there so he got his gun ready. he knew this place was shady and knowing his past experience with the badlands he knew to have his weapon on hand.
“Well at least if i die i don't have to do this again.” he ran through the doorway and busted open the doors, it was into an old hallway.
this hallway was long and dark and let to an old kitchen that was nearly pitch black.
“Fucking hell, electricity just HAD to be the first thing to go. Couldnt have been fucking people or anything.” he said as he walked down the hallway. eventually after trying to be as silent as possible he made it to the kitchen.
he walked carefully through the kitchen, turning on a light on his jacket. He walked through, then pulled out his supplies list.
“Jesus this guy needs a lot, okay uhh” he ran through and looked for a storage cupboard.
Finally finding it he opened it and almost gasped.
It was a full ass walk in the closet kinda thing. It looked like that one from the old movie ratatouille.
He smiled and opened him bag
“Ohh bitch boy is gonna be so fucking happy he will be like ‘i will do the raids for the next week just for you tommy, you and your manly pogness.’ and then i will say ‘oh yes i am so pog, very poggers very ver-” he stopped as he heard footsteps. He looked behind him and stopped dead in his tracks.
It was someone from the antarctic empire, he was looking at an empire member.
Fuck
That's not good
the man infant of him was smaller than him, but he had a giant sword on his back and he was hidden by the darkness. Tommy could only see his silhouette
“So what do we have here hm?” the man spoke.
“What do you think” he retaliated without thinking.
The empire member just chuckled a bit.
“Thought raiders died out during the first two months of this hell, clearly not though, maybe all the good ones did.” the man spoke. He was just out of view and Tommy could barely see the man. normally Tommy wouldn't be stupid in these kinds of situations however this guy had just insulted him, and that he took personally.
“OI fuck you bitch im the greatest raider out there, best of the best. You wouldn't know anything considering your luxury.” he snarked. The figure before him only laughed a bit.
“Luxury? Wow raiders have low standards.”
This guy, was getting on his last fucking nerves.
“Listen pal, I have a gun right here and if you don't let me go it will be pointing right through your fucking eyes right.”
The figure walked forwards and tried to get a good look at him. The figure was tall, he had a weird green jacket and was wearing a strange hat. He was also wearing a cloak, and a funny looking headband and-
Shit
This guy
This is the king of the fucking empire.
He just threaten the fucking king of the most powerful colony in the whole world;
On his list of his bigget fuck ups this maybe ranked at number 4.
“Uh, okay so uhhhh, i will just put this back and um-” the king only smiled a bit before reaching to take his own mask off.
“Kid I'll let you go, besides I'm not a threat, it's the people outside who are. You have a good life though.”
He leaned into tommy and placed a hand on his shoulder, whispering softly
“Steal from us again and i won't be so nice.”
Tommy backed up, and picked up his bag before making a run for it. he tripped couple times and would later see small cuts all over.but it didn't mater, he just needed to get the fuck out of there
“Shit shit shit this place is theirs now fuck.” he ran out the doors and saw three more figures outside near the main entrance. They saw him and started running towards him
“EY GET BACK HERE RAIDER SCUM!”
Ah that was more the normal reaction to his presence.
He ran towards the van and as soon as he got in he sped up, going way over the normal limit but hey, welcome to the apocalypse.
Driving down the road nearly hitting several signs he finally outran the empire. Heaving as he pulled into a new place he realized he had no idea where he was. He saw an old gas station and pulled in to see how much gas he could steal for later.
Pulling into the parking lot he grimaced at the smell of gasoline and got walking into the store.
The store had toppled shelves that were mostly raided already. Walking over a couple corpses here and there he looked into the old aisles. He picked up a couple licorice packages and some old candy and placed it in his bag before making his way to the employees room in the back.
Opening the door he saw something he wasn't expecting.
It looked like an old hideaway, filled to the brim with monster energies, a giant map of the city and even electric radiators powering a fridge. He looked around in awe and then saw something
It looked like an old box but it had heaters over it.
Inside were eggs.
He had no idea why eggs were in a heated box but he decided to say fuck it and grab an egg.
He heard shuffling and saw a figure in the corner sleeping.
“Heh my egg now bitch. I'll be back for more sooner or later.”
He left the room and store and stole a couple gallons of gas as he did.
He placed the egg on his lap and made sure it wouldn't crack.
Making his way through the city he looked for where he was and realized he was a lot closer to home than before.
He raced back and finally made it back to the dennys before Dark
---
“That took longer than normal.” Tubbo said as Tommy walked through the front door. Tubbo himself was working on his mask and gloves a bit more.
“Uhh yeah, about that.” tubbo looked up with a look of displeasure on his face.
“The fuck did you do this time tommy.” tubbo walked over to grab the tuff out of Tommys bag
He took off his goggles and mask and placed his bag down.
“I may or may not have said fuck you the king of the empire.” tubbo looked up and had a small look of shock over his face. Then frustration once more.
“Hey man the guy was fucking annoying as shit man, i was just telling him that.” tubbo walked over and helped unpack the supplies. he marvelled at how much stuff Tommy was able to get.
“Yeah well next time maybe think before you get the empire on our tail, again.” tubbo said as he started packing away some flour
Tommy just stood up and nodded.
He then placed down the egg on the counter
“Found a new place, old 7-11 down the west road. It's pretty secluded and it had a hide out. Plus the guy had eggs like you asked for.”
Tubbo walked over excited and picked up the single egg. Then his look of pure happiness turned to a frown quickly.
“Tommy” tubbo said in a stern almost ice chilling voice
tommy almost felt his audible gulp as he looked to tubbo
“Yes tubbo?”
“This egg, it wasn't somewhere like in an incubator right?”
“The fuck is that, no i found it in a heated box.”
Tubbo groaned and placed down the egg gently.
“Tommy this egg is going to hatch and a chicken is going to come out, fuck we cant afford to take care of something in this day and age.”
Tubbo carried the egg up to the loft and placed it on a pillow and grabbed an old lamp.
Tommy followed and watched tubbo
“What are you doing?” tubbo looked up to the boy
“I'm keeping this egg healthy, because once this thing hatches we are giving it back to the owner.” tommy pouted
“But what if i wanna keep the chicken?”
Tubbo only scolded him, but Tommy didn't pay attention to him, sitting on his bunk and sighing.
Tubbo continued attending to the egg as Tommy fell asleep.
-----
The three watched as the van speed through the city and out of sight
“DAMNIT DAMNIT DAMNIT!”
Phil only sighed
“Wil don't give it any mind, I let him go, and he won't be back here. He wasn't with anyone; he was just a harmless raider." Phil said as he placed a hand on his son's shoulder.
Techno laughed as he walked over and placed his blade back into the hollister
“Yeah will-i-am calm your titties.”
Wilbur turned to the pink haired man and he looked infuriated.
“But that was our stuff, we paid for it! He didn't pay for shit and you just let him off!” phil just sighed
“We can recover it soon, besides we have plenty of stuff back at the base.”
Wilbur just pouted as they hoped on the bikes, heading back to their base.
“I'll get it back, that bitch can't keep hidden forever and when I find him I'll make sure he prays for his crimes against the empire.”
Techno laughed
“Hes baby raging”
“FUCK YOU BLADE!” he sped faster away
The two sped up and started racing
Phil only sighed.
If wilbur was determined to get his stuff back, then there would be no stopping his rampage.