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the sound of longing

Summary:

He kicked himself, mind going into overdrive as he saw Sokka’s brow furrow. He’d thought it had been too quiet for him to hear, but maybe he was wrong and Sokka had heard and now knew, and was confused because he was trying to figure out how to let him down gently, and Zuko had just ruined everything-

“I have absolutely no clue what you just said,” Sokka announced after a moment, dropping his sword to his side. “I couldn’t hear you over all the wheezing.”

or,

Five times Zuko says I love you and Sokka doesn't hear, and one time he does.

Notes:

day 5 of zukka week, for the prompt of 5 + 1!

sorry this is a little late, but it got a little... unwieldy, if the word count tells you anything. anyways, i'm really proud of this and i hope you enjoy it!

just fyi, there is a fight scene in the second scene in which there's mentions of injuries and blood in the second thing, so if you'd rather skip that you can stop at "...bending and weapons left and right" and start again at "His eyes were unfocused again...". also i know absolutely nothing about the comics besides what i read on tumblr and avatar wiki, so take everything i wrote about the new ozai society with a grain of salt

the fic title and subheadings are from Answer Me from The Band's Visit, one of the most beautiful songs i've ever heard. please listen to it, even if you're not a musical person (you don't need any context or anything to appreciate it, lol)

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

i. all alone in the quiet

The first few months after the end of the war passed in a blur of planning Zuko’s coronation, recalling troops, delivering the news that Ozai was no longer in power, weeding out Ozai’s supporters, making sure Azula was going to get the best treatment possible, and countless hours in long meetings working to begin dismantling a century of tyranny. It was hard, grueling work that usually left Zuko dead on his feet with a sharp pain behind his eyes, stumbling to his room late at night and collapsing into bed fully clothed only to rise with the sun and do it again.

Zuko knew that if it weren’t for his friends and Uncle sticking around as things settled down, he would have burned out. As it was they were all swamped, and he couldn’t imagine a single person doing all of it themselves.

Uncle Iroh attended meetings with him, guiding him and helping him to catch up on the things he should have learned during the three years he spent chasing the Avatar. He acted as an advisor and left all decisions to Zuko, but provided his input, interpreted the legal and political jargon he couldn’t understand, and kept the generals, council members, and advisors from bullying him into bad decisions that only furthered their own agenda. He was a steady hand on his shoulder and a kind voice in his ear, and Zuko was sure that he kept him from making countless drastic mistakes. He was also quick with a warm hug and a cup of tea when Zuko needed comfort or to be dragged away from work for a few minutes.

Aang joined them in some meetings, particularly those that involved the Fire Nation’s relationship with the other nations. He helped them plan out reparations and treaties, as well as the returning of conquered land and the liberation of the colonies. He was another invaluable presence in meetings, able to keep the peace while making sure that everyone got to say exactly what they needed to, and also making his own suggestions. Sometimes when Zuko looked at him during those times, he was struck by just how wise and strong he was, despite how young he was, and Zuko often wrapped him into a hug to murmur a heartfelt thank you at the end of each day. If he wasn’t in meetings, he was taking Appa and flying around the world to deliver the news that the war was over and there was a new Fire Lord faster than a letter ever could. 

Katara was all over the place, doing anything and everything she could. She offered her services as a healer to Zuko, giving his lightning wound two healing sessions a day, as well as to any soldiers returning to the Caldera who needed healing. She helped him find the best treatment for his sister, saying that even though she didn’t know that she could ever forgive Azula herself, she didn’t think prison was what she needed or deserved. She travelled with Aang whenever he left, and attended all of the meetings that involved the Water Tribes. She was a firm and steady presence, and she was also the first one to drag everyone into Zuko’s room at night because it was too quiet to sleep alone.

Toph used her bending to weed out Ozai supporters and those who claimed they were there to serve Zuko but were lying. She helped him with reconstruction, too, tearing down walls (and with them memories) before replacing them with open spaces, new rooms, and windows. She tore down the throne room for him, too, laughing gleefully as she reduced the stage his father and grandfather had looked down on him from to rubble. He was endlessly grateful for her, especially when she managed to sense a general hiding a knife in his robes, which he planned to use against Zuko, seconds before he was stabbed. Her brash humor and easy understanding of wanting to break away from his parents and the stuffy formalness of the palace was a relief, and it was nice to be able to spend time with someone who knew how he felt without him having to say it.

Suki, Mai, and Ty Lee formed a terrifyingly dynamic trio, one that he had never seen coming but was endlessly grateful for. The three of them personally set about redistributing security in the palace, including finding weak spots, selecting his personal guard, and hiring and training new guards. They also made it their personal mission to travel around to various prisons, freeing prisoners of war and all others who were unjustly imprisoned, each spurred on by their own experience at Boiling Rock. 

Each of them provided their own comforts, as well, with Suki being an unlikely confidante who he often went to when he needed to talk about things or hear some advice that wasn’t confusing proverbs from his uncle. Mai was a steady presence at his side, content to sit with him in silence and flick through paperwork or make fun of generals and advisors. Ty Lee was always happy to try and make him laugh for a few minutes, however she could, and he quickly learned that she was so much more than just the annoying girl who had been his sister’s friend.

And Sokka… Well, he didn’t know what he’d do without Sokka. They were all working hard, yes, but somehow Sokka was working the hardest out of all of them. He was a whirlwind of blue with a foot in everything, ideas and suggestions flying out of his mouth faster than Zuko could keep up with. He always had at least five scrolls in front of him, countless more spilling out of his bag, and an ink brush in his hand as he furiously took notes. He was in every meeting, even those he didn’t need to be in. 

He was the one to make sure he ate and didn’t work all the way through the night, the first one he went to vent to or ask advice from, the first one he asked for suggestions of how to solve a problem, the one to point out to Toph which advisors seemed shifty, the one to write the announcements that the war was over, the one to make sure he took care of his chest when Katara was gone. He was invaluable, and Zuko tried countless times to tell him how much he appreciated him, but the words never seemed right.

Eventually, though, people had to return home, and things had to come to an end.

Suki and Ty Lee were the first to go, leaving after three months; Suki because she needed to get back to Kyoshi Island and her warriors, and Ty Lee because she wanted to help her new sisters and prove her loyalty to them. 

Mai went next, heading home after three and a half months because she received a letter from her mother about her father’s strange behavior and wanted to check on Tom-Tom. 

Katara and Aang left a few weeks after Mai to go back to the Southern Air Temple and see if there was more there than they’d found originally, before they returned to the Southern Water Tribe to begin helping the reconstruction effort with their waterbending. 

Toph and Uncle Iroh left five months after the war ended, travelling to the Earth Kingdom together. Toph was going back to Gaoling to try and fix things with her parents in person, while Uncle Iroh went to Ba Sing Se to open his tea shop once more.

He kept waiting for Sokka to leave too, to follow Katara and Aang home to the South Pole, but surprisingly, he stayed. Which, ultimately, ended being both a blessing and a curse.

A blessing because it meant Zuko wasn’t alone, the way he was so scared of being. A blessing because it meant Sokka was there to bounce ideas off of, to spar with, to have lunch with, to sneak out into the city with, to comfort him after the first assassination attempt. A blessing because it meant that when Sokka had nightmares about being on the airship, Zuko was there to pull him into a hug. A blessing because when the pain in Sokka’s leg flared up, Zuko was able to help by heating up his hands and massaging it out for him. 

But it was also a curse, because spending so much time with Sokka made Zuko realize just how much he liked his best friend. 

It made him realize that he valued Sokka’s opinion above all others, that meetings were easier with Sokka at his side, that work was more tolerable so long as Sokka was there with his nose buried in his own invention or project. 

It made him realize that Sokka’s smile made his stomach flip, that his touch made his skin burn, that hearing him go on long, passionate rants made him happier than he knew what to do with. 

It made him realize that Sokka’s hugs were the only things he craved after a bad day, that he wanted to be there for Sokka when his leg was hurting, that he wanted to spend lifetimes talking to him and learning his darkest secrets. 

It made him realize he never wanted Sokka to leave, because at some point between their trip to the Boiling Rock and now, he’d fallen in love with his best friend.

But eventually, the day came when Sokka had to leave, just like everyone else.

He broke the news to him after an early morning sparring match, when they were walking through the palace side by side to return to their rooms and prepare for that day’s meetings.

“So, there’s something I want to talk to you about,” Sokka began uneasily, keeping his eyes on his feet. “And I just want you to know that it’s not because of you-”

“You’re going home, aren’t you?” he interrupted, voice gentle even as his heart ached. “It’s okay, Sokka. You don’t have to beat around the bush. When do you leave?”

“At the end of the week,” he said slowly, looking up to frown at him. “Are you sure it’s okay? You don’t mind?”

He shrugged and smiled. “Of course it’s okay, Sokka. And no, I don’t mind. You’ve been gone for a long time- over a year. I’m sure your family misses you, and you them. You should be there with them and your tribe, reconnecting with them and helping to rebuild.”

“Thanks, Zuko. I just… I just worry about you being here alone.”

He rolled his eyes and knocked his shoulder into Sokka’s, ignoring how his heart raced at his words. “I’ll be fine, Sokka. You don’t have to worry. What you should worry about is what we’re going to do before you leave. I’ll clear my schedule for your last day, and we can do whatever you want.”

The promise of Sokka getting to plan their day sufficiently distracted him, and his eyes lit up. “Really? Oh man, I already have so many ideas. Alright, obviously we have to go to the marketplace so that I can get some fire flakes to bring back to Aang and Katara. And maybe I’ll get some silk and some glass beads for Gran-Gran so she can do some embroidery! Dad would probably like… Oh, some chocolate! I’ll get him some dark chocolate. And then we can go to that noodle stand, you know the one…”

He continued on, outlining their day already, and Zuko smiled, knowing he made the right choice, no matter how badly it hurt right now.

He soaked up every moment with Sokka that he could, but the end of the week still came much too quickly, and before he knew it they were down at the docks saying goodbye. His bags had already been loaded onto the boat and the crew was ready to set sail, and now all they were waiting was for Sokka to break away from the tight hug he’d pulled Zuko into.

“I’m going to miss you, Zuko,” he muttered.

His heart splintered. “I’m going to miss you too, Sokka. But tell everyone I say hi, alright? And don’t be shy about writing. I want to hear about everything.”

“Of course. And you too, okay? If you need help or to vent or anything, just write to me. Just because I’m in the South Pole doesn’t mean I’m not still here for you.” He pulled away, staring at him seriously. “You’re sure you’ll be okay?”

He wasn’t, but he wasn’t going to tell Sokka that. Instead, he plastered on a wide smile and clapped his shoulder. “Of course I will be. Now go. Your home is waiting.”

The grin that split across Sokka’s face told Zuko all he needed to know about if this was the right thing to do. “Bye, Zuko.”

As he turned away, he responded quietly, “Bye, Sokka.”

He watched the blue clad figure climb the gangplank, watched as he went to the rail to face him and wave, watched as the ship’s anchor was hauled from the water, watched as the engine started and the ship pushed away from the dock, watched as it grew smaller and smaller until it disappeared beyond the horizon. 

Only then, when he knew Sokka wouldn’t hear, did he murmur what he’d only ever dared to think to himself.

“I love you, Sokka.”

ii. with the world all around

He was getting incredibly tired, Zuko thought as he sprinted down the halls in pursuit of his assailant, of assassination attempts.

The New Ozai Society was getting stronger, growing more bold with every passing day. They were spreading across the nation, collecting members, attacking advisors and ministers who agreed with his policies, holding underground rallies, increasing the number of assassination attempts… 

This was the fourth one in three months, with even the extra guard and the Kyoshi Warriors Suki had offered being unable to keep them out. He didn’t understand how they were managing to continually get into the palace, or why they were accelerating so much. All he knew was that he was very, very tired of waking up in the middle of the night with a blade just inches from his neck.

Zuko ran as fast as he could to catch up, but his assailant was lithe and quick, running through the hallways and darting around fallen guards nimbly. They were pulling ahead quickly, and as he pushed himself even harder despite the burning in his lungs, he thought that he was going to be too late. They were in the main hallway now, the front door getting closer and closer, and he saw his one chance to catch a member of the New Ozai Society and interrogate them slipping away; he was going to lose them.

Except suddenly, from over his shoulder, there was a whistling sound and a blur of silver went sailing right past him. Zuko slid to a stop, chest heaving as he watched the boomerang collide with the assassin’s head with a loud thunk. He would have grimaced in sympathy as the individual collapsed to the ground, immediately out like a light, but he didn’t; for one he was too tired, but also this person just tried to kill him. Getting hit in the head by a boomerang was, he thought, only fair, especially since it meant he now had a prisoner to interrogate.

As the boomerang finished its loop, sailing around the other side of Zuko, he turned and followed it with his eyes.

Sokka stood at the end of the hallway, arm already extended to catch his weapon with a cocky grin. “How was that for a sneak attack?”

Zuko laughed, waiting for Sokka to meet him so they could grab the black clad figure together. As Sokka walked up, sliding his boomerang into the sheath across his back with easy familiarity, he let himself take a moment to appreciate the sight of him- he was still in his ambassador’s robes, clearly having been up late working when he heard the commotion, and his hair was down. In Yue’s light, streaming through the windows Toph had built two years ago now, he was beautiful, and Zuko was reminded, as he so often was, of just how in love with him he was.

He realized he’d been staring when Sokka stopped at his side with an eyebrow raised, and he cleared his throat. He began walking without explanation, just said, “It was perfect. I had no clue you were there until I heard the whistling… See the wonders not calling out ‘Sneak Attack’ does for you?”

“You weren’t even there for that! How come you get to make fun of me for it?”

“Because I’m your best friend, and because while I wasn’t there for the original sneak attack, you have used that during sparring matches.”

He rolled his eyes and jostled Zuko’s shoulder. “Whatever. I still maintain that it makes you laugh.”

“It does,” Zuko agreed, smiling at him before coming to a stop in front of the person crumpled on the ground. “Thank you, by the way. I would have lost them without you.”

Sokka cuffed him on the shoulder, a gesture that told him just how much time he’d been spending with Toph since she came to help them with the New Ozai Society. “Anything for you, buddy. Now, what do you want to do with our friend here?”

He hummed- they could go wake up Toph now, but he didn’t really want to be the one to wake her up in the middle of the night, and the assassin was unconscious anyways. “Let’s just give her to the guards and go to bed. I don’t want to deal with waking Toph up right now.”

Sokka grimaced before bending down and scooping up the assassin. Zuko pointedly looked away from the flexing of his arms- easily visible due to the sleeveless nature of his robes- blushing furiously and cursing himself all the while. He had just nearly died, for spirit’s sake, but all he could think about was how attractive his best friend was… He knew if Mai were here she’d smack him upside the head and call him an idiot.

“Yeah, I don’t want to do that either,” Sokka broke him out of his thoughts.

“Huh?” he asked dumbly.

Sokka furrowed his brow at him in concern. “I don’t want to deal with waking Toph up right now either? The thing you just said you didn’t want to do?”

“Oh. Right.” He blushed an even deeper shade of red, which only made Sokka look more concerned.

“Are you alright, Zuko?”

“Of course I am,” he coughed, looking away. “I’m just tired. Also I just almost died, again, so I think I’m entitled to be a little all over the place.”

Sokka’s concern instantly melted away to something softer and understanding, and he gestured with his arms, “Right. Let me just drop them off with a guard or a Kyoshi Warrior, then we can get you to bed… Speaking of which, where the monkey-feathers are all of your guards?”

Zuko looked around the hall, realizing it was unusually empty, and sighed. “I have no clue, but we will definitely be talking to Suki about that in the morning.”

“Oh man, she and Katara are going to be so pissed when they find out they weren’t woken up by any of this tomorrow.”

He groaned, leaning his head against Sokka’s shoulder. “Don’t remind me, please,” he whined mournfully, already dreading the chewing out they’d give everyone, even him.

-

Katara and Suki were, in fact, livid that they weren’t woken up to help and that the main hall had been completely empty.

“I train all these people,” Suki fumed, pacing around Zuko’s office, “and they can’t even guard the main entrance to the palace? Or wake me up to help? Unbelievable.”

Katara scoffed in agreement, crossing her arms. “Exactly. You have two master benders, the Avatar himself, and two of the best warriors in all four nations, and no one woke any of us up? What if Sokka hadn’t still been up? Which, you need to get more sleep Sokka, you’re going to burn out at this rate.”

He waved a hand at her, though Zuko wished he hadn’t, because she was right- Sokka did need more sleep. “I got distracted working on a new invention, alright? But it’s a good thing I was still up, otherwise I wouldn’t have been woken up either and Zuko might’ve lost her.”

He snorted from where he sat, slouching in his chair. “Would have,” he corrected. “I appreciate the boost of confidence, but… There’s no way I could have caught her. Anyways, it ended up being fine, and we have more important things to worry about right now, judging from the interrogation.”

“What did you learn from the assassin?” Katara asked, sinking into the couch next to Aang.

Zuko sighed and explained, “Her name is Zaya, from Dunori Village. Her entire family is a part of the New Ozai System- she didn’t explain why, but I would guess it’s because Dunori was pretty heavily involved in the war effort. They still call it a village, but because they were a powerhouse for producing armor, airship parts, and weapons during the war, it’s really more of a city like Caldera. Since the war ended we’ve been trying to shift their production to other products so that their economy doesn’t completely fail, but things have still been getting worse there. It’s likely her family was influential in the production of wartime goods, and now that it's over and their wealth is decreasing, they blame me.”

“Did she say why she was here?” Suki asked. “Other than to kill you, obviously. I mean, anything about Ukano’s plans?”

Toph sighed from the arm chair she sat in, feet kicked up on the table before her lazily. “Not really. The most we could get from her was that there’s a meeting happening tomorrow night.”

“It’s underground, beneath one of the warehouses at the docks,” Aang elaborated. “She didn’t say who would be there or why they were meeting, but she said they’d be there at midnight tomorrow.”

Sokka frowned. “It sounds like a trap if I’ve ever heard one.”

“Oh, undoubtedly,” Katara agreed. “We’re still going to go though, right?”

Zuko laughed slightly, placing his elbows on his desk and propping up his head on his hand. “Of course we are. This might be our only chance to learn something, trap or not. We’ll just be ready.”

“Good. I can’t wait to kick some New Loserlord Society ass,” Toph cackled, high fiving Suki. Aang and Katara nodded solemnly, while Sokka turned to smile at him in support.

As Zuko looked at them- Aang and Katara sitting on the couch with their heads leaned close together as they talked about how to bring enough water with them, Toph and Suki comparing the grisly ways in which they wanted to kick the New Ozai Society’s ass, and Sokka perched on the edge of his desk already scribbling plans in the little parchment pad he carried with him- he realized just how lucky he was to have friends willing to throw themselves into danger for him.

It may be a trap, but Ukano and his followers had no clue what was coming their way.

-

The warehouse the meeting was taking place under was right in the heart of the warehouse district, aptly in an abandoned weapons storage facility.

“Could they be any more obvious?” Sokka muttered from next to him. 

They were clustered on the roof of an adjacent warehouse, scouting it out with Katara while Aang flew above it on his glider and Toph and Suki checked it out at ground level.

“We already established it’s a trap,” he whispered back. “Of course it’s obvious.”

“Yeah, but a weapons storage facility? Why couldn’t they go for something like a… Oh, like a boathouse! Or a fishery! It just seems a little bit tacky, is all I’m saying.”

“Maybe you should join their society just to tell them that.”

“Maybe I will!”

“Would you two shut up?” Katara hissed, glaring at them. “I love you both, but spirits, you’re insufferable sometimes.”

Dressed in black as she was, Zuko was reminded of when she froze the rain at Yon Rha’s village into daggers of ice, and he cowered.

Sokka raised his hands in surrender, and they fell back into silence. A few minutes later, in which nothing happened except Sokka’s fidgeting and quiet humming to himself, Aang came gliding back towards them. He landed quietly, folding his glider as he crouched next to Katara. 

“I didn’t see anything from up top, and Toph gave me her signal too- they’re all below ground. We’re good to go.”

They nodded at each other and made their ways down from the roof their respective ways- Zuko jumped to the wall of the next building and slid down it, Katara pushed herself down an ice slide, Aang leapt straight down and bouying himself with airbending, and Sokka rode down the side of the warehouse on a chunk of earth Toph was controlling from her spot by the door.

They reconvened, the six of them crowding together with Toph and Suki. With a synchronized breath, Aang and Toph raised their hands, stomped down, and twisted their wrists, opening a tunnel leading into the ground. They hopped down one by one, Toph and Aang leading the way and opening the tunnel further as they walked further down. Without being asked, Zuko called a flame to his hand to light the way for the rest of them who couldn’t see using the earth. 

They walked quickly, Toph leading them confidently, and Zuko couldn’t help the thrum of excitement in his veins as he looked around at his friends. Although Zuko knew they were walking straight into danger, he couldn’t help but remember those days they’d spent on Ember Island before the war, and how their easy camaraderie was so reminiscent of that time.

They reached their destination after just a few minutes, Toph holding up a finger as she dug her feet deeper into the earth. 

“There are a lot of them,” she whispered. “About… Thirty, I think. A few have swords and other weapons, but for the most part they’re unarmed- benders, I presume. They’re not really doing anything, just standing around, and there are a lot of crates and barrels stacked around them too, but I have no idea what’s in them. They seem like they’re waiting for something.”

“Us,” Zuko said.

“Should we give them something worth waiting for?” Sokka asked, smirking. 

The flickering of Zuko’s flame made his eyes gleam, sharp and dangerous and confident, and Zuko wanted to kiss him more than he ever had before. He swallowed, clearing his head- now was not the time to get distracted by Sokka. Instead, he just nodded at Aang and unsheathed his swords, fire bursting to life along the curved twin blades. At his side, Sokka unsheathed his space sword, Suki flicked open her fans, and Katara pulled a stream of water from one of the canteens she wore on her back.

A split second later, a hole in the wall was punched open by Toph and Aang, and light came rushing into the tunnel at the same time that the six of them came running out. 

Immediately, the room erupted into chaos- although they had been expecting them to come, the New Ozai Society clearly hadn’t been expecting them to come from underground, and they scrambled to grab weapons and face them. 

With a deep breath, Zuko lost himself in the fight. He duck and wove and spun around the men and women rushing at him, using his blades as a way to channel his fire. It became a steady pattern of using firebending to push people back, then using his swords to swipe their legs out from under them or knock them across the head with the hilts once they were off balance. Still, there were a lot of them, and no matter how hard he was trying, he couldn’t stop some of them from getting in lucky shots.

One woman managed to fake him out and land a blow with her sword to his side that, although shallow, still stung painfully every time he moved. Another man sent a fireball careening his way that, despite his efforts to avoid it, singed his black shirt and left a small burn on his arm. Another man, completely ignoring how everyone else was fighting, landed a roundhouse kick to his back that he could already feel bruising. Still though, he kept fighting, and slowly, the number of unconscious enemies began to outweigh those who were conscious.

Something didn’t sit well with him, though, and it wasn’t until he ducked behind a crate to press a hand to his bleeding side that he realized what it was- Ukano wasn’t here.

“Guys,” he shouted, rushing back into the fray with wide eyes- however much of a trap they thought this was, it was even worse.

“Zuko?” Sokka called back, looking over his shoulder quickly to check he was okay. “What’s wrong?”

“Ukano-”

“Incoming!” Toph interrupted, right before the double doors at the other end of the cavern burst open and Ukano and countless more of his followers spilled into the room.

The people they were all fighting all fell back, joining Ukano, and the six of them crowded together. They were all bleeding a little bit and panting, but Zuko was relieved to see that they were all otherwise okay- no serious injuries.

“Do we stay?” Aang asked uneasily. “There’s a lot of them.”

“We defeated the Fire Lord as children,” Sokka said confidently. “I’m pretty sure we can take on some Ozai supporters.”

“That wasn’t even three years ago, Snoozles. We’re still children,” Toph pointed out. “But yeah. We’re staying.”

Suki flipped her fan again, the metal spiraling into a shield, and pulled out her katana. “I’m in too.”

Katara nodded her agreement, and Zuko and Sokka shared a glance. 

“Alright,” Zuko said. “Let’s do this. But Ukano is mine.”

The man stepped forwards, walking slowly towards them. “Zuko, so pleasant to see you again.”

“What do you want, Ukano?” he asked, stepping forwards as well, the fire on his swords doused. “You lured us here, so obviously there’s something.”

“You know exactly what I want, Zuko! To return your father, our rightful leader, to the throne! You’re running this nation to the ground, what with your reparations and your policies… You’re weak.”

“Oh,” he sighed. “So it’s just the same thing as usual then?”

Behind him, he heard Sokka snicker. 

Ukano growled and stalked forward, as if to get up in his face. Zuko lifted his swords quickly, stopping him in his tracks. With the twisted expression on his face, it was hard to believe that this was Mai’s father, and something in his heart cracked a little bit.

“You are an insolent brat,” Ukano spat, “who stole the throne. People are suffering, Zuko, and they’re angry. They- we - will no longer stand to have you in power. This ends tonight.”

“Fine,” he scowled, rainbow fire erupting to life on his blades. “Then let’s end it.”

Once again, the room burst into chaos. Aang had pulled himself up into a wind spout, hovering high above the ground and using all of his power to pull rock from the walls, spew fire from his fists, and freeze people left and right. Katara was doing the same, sailing around the room on a slide of ice and whipping water around her furiously, long braid swinging as she did. Toph had wrapped herself in earthen armor and was bowling through people, sending them flying into the walls and encasing them in stone. Suki and Sokka were back to back, playing off of each other with the natural fluidity they had with each other. They were a swirling storm of swords and fans and shields, blocking weapons and bending left and right.

Zuko himself had thrown himself at Ukano, the man pulling his double bladed staff from his back and retaliating in kind. It was a vicious, dirty fight, the two of them using every trick they knew against each other. At one point, when it seemed Zuko might have the upperhand, Ukano broke his staff into the two separate blades that made it up and met him blow for blow. He sent Zuko stumbling back with a strong swipe straight at his stomach, and before he could recover, managed to make a deep cut on his right shoulder.

He dropped his sword and cried out instantly, the pain sending him crashing to his knees. Ukano just laughed, and in the distance, he thought he heard a voice- Sokka, he realized- cry out his name.

Ukano stalked forwards, twirling the separate pieces of his staff, and said, “You fought well, Zuko. But it wasn’t well enough, unfortunately. And now, it’s over.”

Over my ass,” Sokka yelled, appearing suddenly with his sword raised over his head as he charged at Ukano. “Get away from him!”

Ukano hissed, barely catching Sokka’s strike by crossing his blades. “Meddling boy! This isn’t your fight.”

“Yes, it is. Zuko is my best friend, and any fight of his is one of mine,” he shot back, grunting as he parried. “And you’re wrong about what he’s doing. He’s not ruining things, he’s making them better. He’s barely nineteen, but he’s still the best Fire Lord the Fire Nation has ever had.”

If Zuko wasn’t still dizzy from pain, he would have blushed brightly at such honest words from Sokka. As it was, though, he was too busy trying to get the room to stop spinning and stand up to go help him, so he just filed those words away for the next bad day.

Ukano’s face twisted in rage, and he went after Sokka with such speed and ferocity that he could do little but stumble backwards and try to keep up with parrying blows from two blades. Gritting his teeth, Zuko forced himself to his feet, tightened the grip he held on his left sword, and joined the fray.

He came from the back, using the element of supply to place a scratch along the side of the man’s arm, and he spun his head to look at Zuko. Over his shoulder, Sokka caught Zuko’s gaze and nodded, and at the same time they began swinging. Ukano twisted sideways, taking each of them on with one of his blades, though he mostly focused on Sokka since Zuko was less confident with his left hand and his strength was draining quickly. When, in unison, he and Sokka both brought their swords up to attack from above, Ukano hinged at the waist to duck under it. His torso went towards Sokka, while he kicked up a foot and slammed it into Zuko’s stomach.

He fell back, the wind knocked out of him, and dropped his other sword. Ukano, rather than continuing to attack either of them, turned and began running, and over his coughing Zuko heard him yell, “Fall back! Retreat!”

He frowned, gasping for breath- he was vulnerable, breathless and on the ground, so why was Ukano having them all retreat? He looked to Sokka to see if he knew what was going on, only for the breath he’d barely managed to catch to get sucked out of his lungs.

Because Sokka, rather than standing there putting the pieces together and swinging his sword idly, was in a heap on the ground, his hand clutched to his stomach and his breathing labored.

“Sokka!” he yelled, leaping to his feet and running over to his side, his own injuries forgotten. 

Their friends all heard the cry and looked over, echoing it as they rushed forwards and crowded around him. 

His eyes were open but unhazy, and when he managed to focus them on Zuko he smiled. “Hey Zu,” he muttered weakly. Zuko could tell just how exhausted he was from the nickname that slipped through his lips. “I’m fine, I promise.”

“What happened?” he gasped, paling as he saw red seeping through Sokka’s fingers where it was clasped over his stomach. 

“Ukano. When he kicked you, he lunged forward with his dagger thing and stabbed me.”

He pulled Sokka’s hand away gently, immediately feeling nauseous when he saw the messy wound in his stomach. It wasn’t near any vital organs, luckily, but it was bleeding a lot and he whimpered in pain when Zuko touched the area just above it lightly.

Katara, on her knees across from Zuko, pulled water to her hands and immediately began holding it over the wound. “I can start to heal it here, but I’m going to need more clean water than I have left. Aang, can you fly up and get Appa? We need to get back to the palace as quickly as possible, and we won’t be able to walk him back like this. Plus Zuko is pretty hurt, too.”

Zuko frowned, not sure what she was talking about, then he remembered the cut on his side and shoulder- taking Appa back was definitely a good call.

“Of course.” Aang immediately tore a hole in the rock ceiling above them, opened his glider, and launched himself upward with a strong jump, the burst of air sending dust flying into the air and their hair whipping around them.

“Suki, Toph, are you okay?” Katara asked, looking up at them to check. 

They both nodded, though Zuko noticed a long shallow gash on Toph’s arm and a cut surrounded by a quickly darkening bruise on Suki’s cheekbone.

“Yeah, we’re fine. What can we do?” Suki asked.

“Round up the people who are unconscious. Maybe some of them will give us answers,” she ordered.

“What about me?” Zuko asked as they turned away.

She looked at him with serious eyes and said, “Keep holding his hand.”

There was more behind her words, he knew there was, but he didn’t think about it. Instead, he just grasped Sokka’s blood slick hand with his own and looked down at him. 

His eyes were unfocused again, slowly drifting shut, and as the water began to glow blue, Zuko whispered down at him, “Spirits Sokka, why’d you do that?”

“Do what?” he asked thickly.

“Why’d you rush in front of Ukano like that?”

“You were in trouble, Zuko. I wasn’t just going to leave you there.”

“If you had, you wouldn’t be hurt now.”

Sokka rolled his eyes and squeezed his hand tightly. “And you’d be dead. I’d rather be hurt now and have you here holding my hand, than not be hurt and have to go to your funeral.”

Zuko didn’t know what to say, overcome by emotion, and he just squeezed Sokka’s hand back. “Thank you for saving me,” he settled on. “Again.”

Sokka’s eyes glittered brightly as he responded, “I’d do it a thousand times over.”

Those three words lingered on his tongue, aching to be spoken at Sokka’s words, but he swallowed them down. Instead, he kept them where Sokka wouldn’t hear them, and thought to himself, I love you.

I love you, I love you, I love you.

iii. only you and the sun

Sokka grinned at Zuko through their crossed blades, a sharp glint in his eyes that made Zuko swallow thickly. Their chests were both heaving as sweat dripped down their necks in the heavy heat and their skin shone in the sun, arms straining as they pushed back against each other. Zuko’s swords were crossed, each arm held tight and his wrists unbending, while Sokka’s single blade bore down, both hands on the hilt as he tried to get Zuko to drop his blades so that he could claim victory.

“Yield,” he said shortly, even through his grin.

“No,” Zuko grunted, squaring his feet and pushing back even harder. “You said I’m out of practice, and now I need to prove you wrong.”

“You did prove me wrong! And I apologized!”

“It’s the principle of the matter, Sokka. If I let you win here, you won’t let me live it down.”

Sokka quirked an eyebrow. “Well, you’re not wrong there.”

“I know I’m not. Just like how you now know I’m not out of practice,” he said. With one last push, he’d leaned into his front foot and threw his arms up, the motion sending Sokka stumbling back and dislodging his sword from Zuko’s.

Sokka smirked, regaining his footing several paces away and spinning his blade in a circle at his side. “Not bad... I think that one leaves us tied. So, make this the last round, the winner takes all?”

Zuko nodded, raising his swords and dropping his left leg so that he was in a shallow lunge. “Winner takes all.”

Unlike most times they fought together, Sokka didn’t wait this time. Instead, as soon as Zuko finished speaking, he came sprinting at him, swinging wildly. He came from the top, which Zuko caught with his right sword, before dropping low and catching his left. In a rapid flurry, they jumped wildly between clashing down by their knees and up above their heads.

Zuko tried feinting by going for Sokka’s knees while simultaneously coming from above, but Sokka predicted the movement and was able to jump backwards and out of the way quickly enough that both Zuko’s blades hit empty air. They grinned at each other, something wild in Sokka’s blue eyes, and the glint in them made Zuko rush forwards first. He went low again, but Sokka jumped neatly over his right sword, so he spun around with his left to meet Sokka’s blade behind his back.

Sokka laughed at the move and as he came at Zuko with another vicious combination of strong attacks called out, “Not bad. That was pretty fancy.”

He laughed right back, switching from defense to offense with a step forward that Sokka wasn’t expecting. “Less talking, more fighting.”

“As you wish, jerkbender,” he snarked, meeting every blow that Zuko sent his way.

He ducked under a wild swing of Sokka’s sword, trying to go for his knees again, but he became unbalanced when his foot slipped on one of the courtyard tiles. Sokka used his unsteadiness to bring one of his knees up and jab it into Zuko’s stomach. It was light enough that it didn’t hurt, but it still surprised him and sent him reeling back. Sokka used the distraction to slam his sword down onto Zuko’s left sword right where the guard met the blade, and the blow sent the sword clattering to the ground. Before Zuko could grab it, he kicked it across the courtyard.

“You were saying?” Sokka snarked, giving him a split second to stand upright again before rushing him again.

Zuko felt uncoordinated and choppy with just his right sword, but he still managed to parry away a particularly strong blow. He used the momentum to send him to his knees, spinning around and swiping at Sokka’s shins. His friend blocked it by holding his sword straight down, and when Zuko spun back up to his feet, he flicked the black blade up so that it was under his chin.

“Not bad,” Zuko echoed his earlier words before hitting the sword away with the pommel of his own. “But not good enough.”

They stayed close, twisting their swords between them quickly in a furious dance of silver and black. The clashing of their blades rang through the courtyard, a familiar song after so many years and sparring sessions, and Zuko couldn’t help but smile.

“What? Why are you all smiley?” Sokka asked breathlessly as their swords locked, Zuko holding his sideways and Sokka’s pointing up to the sky. He smiled back at him as he spoke, his eyes crinkling in a decidedly distracting way, and Zuko couldn’t help but melt at how beautiful he was.

“Nothing,” he said, pushing back slightly. “Just thinking I’m about to win.”

Then, before Sokka could do anything, he pushed forwards with all his strength and stuck his foot out. Sokka tripped right over his foot and went crashing to the ground, and with a decisive series of movements Zuko stepped over him, placing one foot on the tip of the space sword to keep it from budging. With a smirk, he held the top of his dao to Sokka’s throat.

What he didn’t account for, though, was the fact that Sokka now had no choice but to stare up at him with wide eyes, panting for breath with his lips slightly parted. 

What he didn’t account for was how beautiful Sokka looked in the sun- the golden light reflecting off of the sweat on his skin, haloing his dark hair in a ring of gold, and making his eyes sparkle that much brighter- or that it would make Zuko falter. 

What he didn’t account for was that Sokka would see him falter, or that a slow smile would spread across his face, or that his legs would wrap around his own in a distinctly Kyoshi Warrior way and send Zuko crashing to the ground barely a moment later.

He landed with a grunt, the wind knocked out of him, and Sokka leapt to his feet to echo his position early. The tip of Sokka’s space sword pressed into his chin lightly enough that it wouldn’t hurt him, but hard enough that he could feel the coolness of the blade on his skin. He sighed as he collapsed into the ground, knowing defeat when he saw it. Sokka smiled brilliantly as he looked down his arm, so bright and beautiful that Zuko couldn’t even pretend to be angry.

Instead, his mouth spoke before his brain could catch up, and he said fondly, “I love you.”

Or he tried to say it, but the wind was still knocked out of him, so it came out as a quiet, breathless wheeze. Immediately he froze, realizing that he had just blurted out his greatest secret- the one he’d been keeping for nearly four years- right in front of the person in question. 

He kicked himself, mind going into overdrive as he saw Sokka’s brow furrow. He’d thought it had been too quiet for him to hear, but maybe he was wrong and Sokka had heard and now knew, and was confused because he was trying to figure out how to let him down gently, and Zuko had just ruined everything-

“I have absolutely no clue what you just said,” Sokka announced after a moment, dropping his sword to his side. “I couldn’t hear you over all the wheezing.”

He rolled his eyes, though his body relaxed significantly and he exhaled slowly. “Well whose fault is that, exactly? You’re the one who knocked the wind out of me after I had already won.”

“You did not win!” he squawked indignantly. “I got the drop on you! If you’d won, that wouldn’t have happened.”

He was right, but Zuko still said, “I beat you fair and square, and you know it. You just don’t want to admit it.”

“No, you didn’t,” Sokka shot back, though he stuck out a hand to haul Zuko to his feet. “I am sorry you hit the ground so hard, though. Usually when I use that move there’s a mat under us, not cobblestones.”

He shrugged, ignoring how warm Sokka’s hand was in his or how he very much did not want to let go, even after his hand had already lingered in Sokka’s for slightly too long. “It’s alright… You were just trying to recover from an embarrassing loss, and had to cheat however you could.”

“I didn’t cheat! And if you think using one of Suki’s moves is cheating, you better watch your back and hope she never finds out- she wouldn’t hesitate to beat you up. And we both know it would go a lot worse than it just did.”

“Mhm,” he hummed, smiling at him sideways. “Say that all you want, but we both know the truth about who really won… Anyways, lunch?”

Sokka nodded enthusiastically and they fell into step, where Sokka immediately began to ramble about how cool one of the moves Zuko had used was. 

He tried to pay attention, but he couldn’t stop returning to what he’d said.

He couldn’t stop wishing that Sokka had heard him, if only so that he no longer had to carry this secret. 

iv. take off like a sparrow

Things with Sokka had been… Weird lately.

Nothing had happened between them, at least not that Zuko could think of- they had just been continuing to go about life normally when things suddenly changed, and now there was an unmistakable tension between them.

The air between them always seemed to be crackling and strained, tense enough that Zuko thought he'd be able to cut right through it with his twin blades. Sokka was withdrawing, too, preferring to sit in silence rather than fill the air between them with wild stories, jokes, or his latest ideas for new inventions and policies. His usually expressive face was closed off and far more serious than Zuko had seen it since the end of the war- if he didn't know better, he’d think they were in the middle of a battle with enemies knocking on their doors.

At first, he’d thought Sokka’s behavior was unrelated to him, but rather to do with a problem he couldn’t solve or another ambassador or his family. Except Sokka usually came to him with a problem, ranting about it until something he said out loud clicked and led to the solution, and he hadn’t done that recently. He’d seen Sokka interacting with the other diplomats, advisors, and ministers, and he was fine- even with the ones he didn’t particularly like, he was all smiles and excited conversations and jokes. And when Zuko wrote to Katara to ask if everything with their family was alright, he received a letter saying that everyone was perfectly fine and thanking him for his concern. 

No, whatever was wrong between them- whatever had Sokka retreating into himself- it had to do with him, and him alone.

The thought made his heart ache, his hands tremble, his eyes sting, his stomach flip… It tilted his world on its axis until he didn’t know which way to go, until he was unmored and floating in the sea, alone at the mercy of the waves. 

All he knew was whatever he’d done to push Sokka so far away, he needed to fix it, because the longing was going to kill him. Not just the longing for the person he loved, though that was very much a part of it, but also the longing for his best friend. It had been weeks since they’d spoken normally at this point, and Zuko was lonely- Sokka was right there, and at the same time he’d never so far away. 

He just… He missed their easy conversation, missed hearing Sokka launch into a passionate ramble, missed the casual shoulder bumps and hair ruffles that were so commonplace between them, missed looking at Sokka and seeing him smile.

So, with steely resolve, he promised that he’d figure out what he’d done- all he needed was to find an opportunity to talk to Sokka.

It finally came after a long, frustrating budget meeting, in which the Minister of Defense insisted that they were spending more money on the other nations and Republic City then they were on protecting their own citizens. It was an old argument, one he was long used to hearing, and he was prepared to take note of the minister’s concerns before forgetting about it entirely. Except when he thanked the minister for his concern, it turned out he had more to say, and about Zuko himself, no less. The minister proceeded to make it very clear that he thought his attachments to the Avatar and his friends had skewed his vision, and made no attempt to hide that he didn’t find Zuko fit to rule.

He was prepared to let it go, considering how many times he’d heard it before, but then Sokka rushed to defend him. 

In a stony voice, he said the minister was making baseless accusations of Zuko’s bias, before he pulled on the budgeting sheets to prove that the defense budget actually was in order, especially considering that they were no longer fighting a war. From there the room exploded into shouting, with people taking sides and talking over each other until Zuko managed to gain control of the room once more.

“Alright, that’s enough,” he said loudly, standing up to his full height. “We’re going to get nothing done with this arguing, so this meeting is adjourned for the day. We’ll resume tomorrow.”

“Lord Zuko-” an advisor began, but he cut him off with a look.

“Please, it’s late in the evening. I’m sure we’re all hungry and that none of us are looking forward to spending our night arguing about things that have already been discussed many times before. Go home. Have dinner. The budget will still be here tomorrow, and maybe we can actually have a conversation about it then.”

The advisor dipped his head then bowed, the rest of the people gathered around the long table copying him.

As everyone began to pack up and filter out through the room, Zuko cleared his throat and asked, “Ambassador Sokka, would you please stay for a moment? I have a matter I’d like to discuss with you.”

He felt bad for using what Sokka called his “Fire Lord voice,” especially when he looked up at Zuko with tension already lining his shoulders, but he couldn’t risk anyone else knowing he wasn’t actually going to discuss something serious- or at least, not politically serious- after that argument. Sokka squared his shoulders and nodded, and after just a few more seconds the room was empty.

“Listen,” Sokka began as soon as the curtain swung shut behind the last person. “I’m sorry for picking a fight and starting all of that, I didn’t mean to. I just can’t believe there are still people out there who think you don’t care about your people, especially when they so poorly hide how much of a garbage nationalist they are-”

“That’s not what this is about, Sokka,” Zuko cut him off, reaching out to place a soothing hand on Sokka’s shoulder before stopping himself- he didn’t know if Sokka would want him to touch him after whatever it was he did. He pulled his hand back after a moment, noticing how Sokka traced it with an unreadable look. 

“Then what is it about?”

“Walk with me?” Zuko asked, smiling softly and tilting his head so that Sokka knew he wasn’t angry. 

He thought, for a moment, Sokka was going to say no as his shoulders tightened, but then his friend sighed and nodded. “Yeah, okay. I’ll walk with you.”

Zuko tried to not look too pleased as he fell into step with Sokka, leading them out of the main part of the palace and to the gardens.

“So…” Sokka asked after a while of walking in silence. “If you’re not mad at me for getting into a fight, what’s this about?”

He paused, choosing his words carefully. “You’ve been… I’ve noticed you haven’t quite been yourself around me, and I was just wondering if I did something. I’ve spent hours wondering what that might be, but I come up with nothing every single time. I just… I just miss you, Sokka, and I don't know what I did, but I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, and whatever it was, I hope it doesn’t hurt our friendship… I don’t know what I’d do if it did.”

It was more than he meant to say, and he felt scrubbed raw by the time he was finished, but at the same time he was glad to have said it.

Sokka made a low noise in his throat, as if he was hurt, and Zuko looked at him to find his blue eyes dark with emotion.

“No, Zuko,” he whispered. “It’s not… It’s not you. I know I haven’t been myself lately, but I promise you didn’t do anything. I’m sorry it seemed as though I was upset with you or something, I swear that wasn’t the case.”

“Then what is it?” he asked, torn between relief that he hadn’t done anything and sorrow that whatever it was, Sokka didn’t feel he could trust him with it. “Why haven’t you talked to me about it?”

Sokka faltered, his face flickering with something Zuko could only describe as grief. “I… I didn’t want to burden you with it?”

He didn’t sound convinced by his own reason, and Zuko shot him an unimpressed look. “After five years of being friends, you didn’t want to burden me with something?”

“Yeah, it sounded lame, even to me,” Sokka sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I don’t know, Zuko, it just doesn’t feel like something I can tell you. And I don’t mean that as in I don’t trust you or that I want to keep it from you, it’s just that I…”

Zuko thought he understood, because he told Sokka everything, and yet he’d been keeping one of the biggest secrets he’d ever had from him for five years. Not because he didn’t trust Sokka, or because he didn’t want to- after so many years of keeping it, the temptation to tell Sokka how he felt about him was overpowering. But everytime he thought about saying it out loud, to Sokka’s face, it was… It was terrifying.

“You can’t,” Zuko finished for him.

“Yeah. I want to, Zuko,” Sokka rushed, clearly anxious. “I want to tell you how I feel about you so badly, but everytime I think about it, I get freaked out and start thinking about how it might change everything, and I freeze. Because I like how things are, and I can’t help but imagine that telling you would change everything. So I’ve been retreating because these past few weeks, because I looked at you and it was right there on the tip of my tongue, waiting to be spoken, but I wasn’t ready. And so I pulled away, thinking it would help me get my feelings under control. But it hasn’t, it’s just made you miserable, and now I’m miserable, and I just don’t know what to do.”

Zuko stopped in his tracks as Sokka rambled on, blood pounding in his ears. He tossed his words around, unsure he was hearing them right. Because what Sokka said almost made it… Well, it sounded like how Zuko felt about confessing, but that didn’t make any sense. Because if Sokka felt that way too, then it meant…

“Sokka, what do you mean you want to tell me how you feel?” he asked, words ringing hollow in his ears.

He froze, several paces ahead since he hadn’t realized Zuko had stopped. “Uh… What?”

“What you said at the beginning. You said… You said you want to tell me how you feel about me. What does that mean?”

“Did I say that? I don’t think I did, you must be hearing things,” Sokka said, voice an octave higher- a sure sign that he was getting defensive. 

“Sokka, wait! It’s okay. Because if it means what I think it means, then I… I feel the same.”

“...What?” 

“I have some feelings that I want to talk about too,” he said slowly, taking a hesitant step forward. When Sokka didn’t move, he took another. “Feelings that I’ve been keeping to myself for a long time, too scared of admitting out loud because they might change everything between us.”

Sokka’s mouth parted slightly in shock as he stared at Zuko, pupils wide. “Oh,” he said after a moment. “Um, well that’s… Maybe we should… Maybe we should talk about them, then.”

“Maybe,” he agreed, smiling shyly. 

Suddenly faced with this conversation, he felt like he was a little kid again, awkwardly telling Mai he liked her. Except this was so much more intense, because while he had liked Mai well enough, he hadn’t actually been attracted to her. With Sokka, though… Well, he loved Sokka more than he’d ever imagined he could love anyone.

“I… Well, I pretty much already put it out there, so I guess I’ll go first, then,” Sokka said with a deep breath and a matching smile. “I like you, Zuko. As in, I’m attracted to you and I want to do all of the things couples do with you- kissing, cuddling, going on cheesy dates, holding your hand beneath tables, dancing so close we have no choice but to step on each other’s toes… I want to wake up beside you every morning and hold you as we fall asleep every night and introduce myself to people as Zuko’s boyfriend and know every single one of your idiosyncrasies. I just… I want you, Zuko.”

Zuko felt like he could fly listening to Sokka, the revelation that the person he’d been in love with for five years shared his feelings like air beneath his wings. His heart threatened to burst, beating against his ribs so hard he was sure Sokka could hear it, and he realized there were tears prickling at his eyes.

“Sokka, I-” he began, cutting himself off with a choked sob in his happiness. He just beamed, reaching down to grab Sokka’s hand with his own. “I want that too. I’ve wanted that since I was seventeen years old and watched you leave for the Southern Water Tribe for the first time.”

Sokka smiled weakly, eyes shining with adoration, and his free hand came up to brush across the skin just underneath Zuko’s scar. “You’ve kept that secret all these years? Zuko…”

Under the softness of Sokka’s touch, Zuko’s eyes fluttered shut and he had to take a deep, shaky breath. “It wasn’t easy, but it’s like you said- I was scared it would change things between us, or that I’d scare you off with my feelings… It was easier to pine in secret than say something and risk losing my best friend.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Sokka murmured softly, and Zuko opened his eyes to find Sokka closer than he’d been before- so close that their breaths mixed in the air between them and he could count the freckles across Sokka’s cheekbones. “I promise, you’re not going to lose me. You’re stuck with me now.”

Zuko smiled, leaning in further until their noses brushed softly. “Good,” he whispered, just before Sokka closed the rest of the distance and pressed their lips together.

The kiss was gentle, Sokka’s lips soft and hesitant against him, but so achingly tender that Zuko thought he might burst. His free hand found its way into Sokka’s hair, tangling through his soft strands of his ponytail to pull him closer and deepen the kiss, and Sokka let out a relieved sigh. They kissed slowly, languidly, tenderly, for what could have been seconds or hours, until the ache in Zuko’s lungs forced him to pull away and breathe. He didn’t go far, just rested his forehead against Sokka’s- suddenly grateful they were the same height- and smiled warmly as he breathed deeply.

“Hi,” Sokka whispered, hand drifting down from Zuko’s face to his hip. There, it rubbed across his shirt softly, but even so Zuko could feel the burn of his touch.

“Hi,” he whispered back.

What he meant was, I love you.

v. my beloved lies besides me

Dating Sokka was… It was surreal. 

After five years of looking and longing and wishing, the fact that he was able to look at Sokka and say that’s my boyfriend, pull him into a kiss whenever he wanted, hold his hand in the halls as they walked between meetings, snuggle up to him at night… Sometimes, it seemed too good to be true.

Moments like this, though, where they were just snuggled up on the couch in Zuko’s office, reminded him just how real it was.

Zuko was laying on his back reading through all of the new proposals, letters, and documents that had found its way onto his desk this morning, while Sokka laid practically on top of him. He’d been working too, holding his own scroll at an awkward angle as he read it, but it had been hours at this point and Sokka had long since set the scroll aside in favor of pressing even closer to Zuko.

Now, he had one arm slung across Zuko’s waist and his head pillowed by his chest, and their legs were such a tangled mess it was difficult to tell where one began and the other ended. His eyes had slipped shut and his breathing was steady, his chest rising and falling gently. Zuko didn’t need to ask to know that Sokka was asleep.

Sappily, Zuko realized his own breathing had shifted to match it, but he couldn’t even be embarrassed by it, instead consumed by how happy he was.

He set aside the letter he was reading, something about agriculture that he’d have to read again later seeing as he’d read it five times and still didn’t understand what this minister was talking about. For now, though, he set it down on the table carefully so as not to jostle Sokka and just gazed fondly at his boyfriend.

He was just so… So beautiful and warm and wonderful that it made his heart ache, and he couldn’t help the smile that came across his face or the peace that settled in his bones. Because here he was, laying on his couch with his boyfriend latched onto him like a koalaotter and setting aside work to pull him closer, right in the middle of the day. It was lazy and indulgent and saccharine sweet, and Zuko felt like the luckiest person in the world.

He hadn’t had an easy childhood and he’d made a lot of mistakes, both as a teenager and as a ruler, but he thought he’d make all of them again if it led to him being here with Sokka.

With a soft sigh of content, he brought his free hand up to comb through Sokka’s hair, soft enough not to wake him up but with enough purpose that he could feel the softness of it slip through his fingers, and let his own eyes slip shut.

Into the quiet of the room, he whispered, “I love you, Sokka.”

Sokka didn’t even stir.

vi. only you

“Come with me,” Sokka exclaimed, bursting through the doors of Zuko's office. 

He looked up from the letter he was writing to Mai and smiled when he saw Sokka standing there with mischief in his eyes and a bounce in his heels; clearly, he had something planned for them.

“Do we have time for me to finish my letter to Mai? I’m almost done, there’s just a few more sentences.”

Sokka nodded easily. “Of course we have time. I figured you’d be in the middle of something, so extra time has been built into our schedule.”

Zuko laughed, which made him beam brilliantly, and as he returned to writing Sokka came around the edge of his desk and draped himself over Zuko, his chin on his shoulder and his arms wrapped around him. Zuko sighed into the touch, even as he finished telling Mai that it had been far too long since she visited and he hoped to see her soon. He signed it with a flourish and had barely set his brush back in the ink pot before his chair was being pulled away from the desk. 

Sokka’s hands found his soon after and he pulled him to his feet with a strong tug. 

“Sokka!” Zuko laughed, stumbling slightly as he tried to keep up with his boyfriend’s excitement. “Hold on, I just need to-“ He pulled his hands away to undo his top knot and take off his hairpiece, which he set on his desk, and shook out his hair. “There. No more Fire Lord for the night- I’m all yours.” He looked up to see Sokka staring at him in awe and asked fondly, “What?”

“Nothing. You’re just so beautiful, and I am so lucky to have you in my life.”

Zuko’s heart fluttered, despite it not being the first or even hundredth time he’d heard Sokka say this in the past few months. He reached out and threaded their fingers together and squeezed. “And I’m lucky to have you. Now, where exactly are you stealing me away to?”

“Oh,” he smiled slyly, leaning in quickly to peck Zuko’s cheek. “You’ll see. Just follow me.”

They stopped by his room, which he supposed could be considered their room at this point seeing as Sokka had been staying there every night rather than in his own quarters- not that Zuko minded. Really, sharing a bed with him and seeing Sokka’s things scattered around his room- the boomerang laying on his desk, the blue tunics mixed in with deep red robes, the leather hair ties next to his own ribbons- filled his heart with joy. Sokka let go of his hand for just a moment to swipe their travel robes from the table, where they were neatly folded and clearly waiting for them.

As Zuko pulled it on, he asked, “We’re going into the city?”

Sokka winked. “I told you, you’ll see. I have a whole plan.”

“I know, I know. I’ll stop asking questions now. I can’t help but be curious, though, especially when a very handsome ambassador comes in and pulls me from my work.”

He reached out to adjust Zuko’s hood slightly and teased, “Who in their right mind would do such a thing? The audacity.”

“Clearly they think that because they’re pretty, they’ll get away with it.”

Sokka’s hands had stilled on his hood now, his thumbs resting on Zuko’s cheeks, and he leaned in to ask, “And will they?” 

Zuko smiled slightly and leaned in to kiss him slowly. “Oh, definitely. They’re very convincing when they want to be, and I can’t say no to that smile.”

Sokka laughed against his lips, and when they broke apart he threaded their fingers together. “Good. Cause I know you’re going to love this.”

Sokka led him through the palace and city quickly, though Zuko soon realized they weren’t actually heading into the heart of the city like he’d thought they would be. Instead, Sokka was leading him through the narrow winding streets that would take them to the edge of the caldera, and he wondered what he had planned. Not that it really mattered what it was, because he knew that as long as Sokka was there, he’d love it.

The sun was beginning to sink lower and lower in the sky as they took the beaten path to climb up the caldera, and by the time they reached the top, the sky was just beginning to turn bright shades of pink, purple, and orange. There was a simple wooden swing set a little ways down the path with faded blue paint that was peeling off in long strips, and Sokka led Zuko to it without hesitation. The two seats attached to the frame- nothing more than a plank of wood suspended by some chain- were close enough that once they sat down, they could still hold hands and look out over the ocean, shining gold under the last of Agni’s rays.

“So… What do you think?” Sokka asked, the slightest bit of hesitation in his voice betraying the fact that he actually thought Zuko might not like it.

Zuko looked over at him and his breath caught, because Sokka was radiant in this lighting. “It’s beautiful,” he said breathlessly.

“Good,” he smiled in relief. “I know I said I was sure you’d like it, but I honestly wasn’t sure.”

“I love everything I do with you, Sokka.”

The hand holding his squeezed tightly. “It’ll get better, I promise.”

Zuko wasn’t sure how this could possibly get any better, but he trusted Sokka. As the sun set, they swung back and forth gently, talking quietly about mindless things- a play Zuko read, a woman and her hissing bearded-cat that Sokka saw when he went to the ambassador’s embassy earlier that day, the latest palace gossip… It was peaceful, and the world faded away until all Zuko knew was Sokka.

When the sky had finally faded to a dark purple and the moon was out, Sokka whispered, “It should be any minute now, if my information is correct.”

“What-” Zuko trailed off, because suddenly there was a silver glow illuminating Sokka’s face.

“There we go,” Sokka sighed, smiling over at him. “Look.”

Zuko tore his eyes away from Sokka to look, jaw dropping when he saw what Sokka brought him up here to see. The entire hillside of the caldera was covered in some sort of flower, each one’s petals glowing silver under the moon. He’d never seen anything like it, and he dropped Sokka’s hand to crouch near one of them. He brushed his fingers across the petals, confused when they were just as soft as any other flower. It was as if the glow came from within the flower itself, and he looked at Sokka in awe.

“How is this possible? And how did I not know that this was here?” he whispered, the beauty of the flowers making it seem wrong to speak any louder.

“It’s really rare… There’s a very specific set of conditions that lead to luminescence, such as the right temperature and amount of light absorbed during the day. Basically, it triggers a chemical reaction, which makes the flowers glow,” Sokka explained quietly. “But it only happens every so often, and so I don’t think many people know they’re up here.”

“How did you know, then?”

“Well originally I was just going to get you flowers,” he chuckled. “But the florist recognized me as someone close to the Fire Lord, and told me about these. They said that the conditions would be just right tonight, so I decided to take the chance… What do you think?”

“Sokka, this is absolutely amazing. I love it.” He looked at Sokka, smiling at the flowers happily and shrouded by silver light, and realized that after so many times where he’d wanted to tell Sokka he loved him, now was finally the right moment. “I love you.”

Unlike all the other times he’s said it, there wasn’t that same spike of panic or any doubt that Sokka had heard it- just a deep sense of relief and peace.

Sokka turned to face him, a soft, sappy, adorable smile on his face, and said easily, “I love you too, Zuko.”

Zuko’s heart skipped several beats, and all he could do was laugh and lean heavily into Sokka. “I’ve waited for so long to say that, you have no idea.”

“Well, now you don’t have to wait any longer,” Sokka chuckled, his arm wrapping around Zuko’s shoulders. “Because I love you, and I already know I will never get tired of telling you or hearing it from you.”

His heart did a funny flip in his chest, and he turned his face to capture Sokka’s lips in a gentle kiss. “I fully intend on telling you how much I love you every single day, then.”

“Good,” Sokka murmured against his lips, kissing him again. “Because I do too.”

Zuko hummed in content, leaned that much closer to Sokka, and looked back at the flowers. 

And there, underneath the silver moonlight, the rest of the world faded away until it was just him, Sokka, and the echo of their whispered confessions- the answer to all his longing.

Notes:

Thank you as always for reading and for leaving comments/kudos, and check out my tumblr! (@backhurtyy)

Also uh I definitely based Sokka and Zuko's sparring match off of a lightsaber battle from Star Wars, and if anyone can guess which one it is I will give you a kiss on the forehead