Archive of Our Own

LAST GOODBYE

(“Master Diluc, will you allow me to be selfish this one time and ask you to go out with me?”

“I think you had too many drinks.”

“Come on, just this once. I’ve heard Starsnatch Cliff is exceptionally beautiful in a clear night like this.”)

The bottom of the cliff was a pitch black abyss he could barely see. He was standing at the edge; the wind playing with his red hair and making more of a mess out of it while the highway behind him was eerily silent.

The sky above him had slowly turn from bloody reddish color into the inky black of the night, but the passing of time felt so surreal. He didn’t know how long he’d been standing there. He couldn’t remember why he was standing there or what made the cliff seem so fascinating for him. He couldn’t remember a single damn thing except for the gruesome image of his own father being killed by some petty thieves in their own car while they were driving on this highway.

It unsettled him—how even his own name escaped but the image from his worst memory stayed at the forefront of his mind.

He blinked, as if waking up from a trance, and gazed back to the deep, deep abyss just a step away from him. Temptation pulled on him. It’d be very easy to take that one last step—to let gravity pull at him until in the end there’d be nothing left of him but a broken body. It might be fitting for him who was no more than a vessel of bad memories right now. It might even give him some peace of mind.

He closed his eyes, a sense of calm filled him as he came into decision. His body leaned forwards, no longer fighting against the wind, and his muscles twitched when he finally moved them. Just one step. Just one and then he could finally—

“Careful there. One more step and you’ll actually fall off the cliff.”

The sudden, foreign voice made his whole body freeze up. He hadn’t realized someone had come close enough to him. The intruder’s words registered a moment later and he scowled. 

“What if that’s exactly what I want?” He asked.

The intruder, unexpectedly, chuckled. “You know, no matter how many times I give you the warning, you always give me the same answer. Truly, your dedication is one of a kind.”

That response intrigued him. Almost against his own will, he finally turned around, giving his back to the Abyss that had been calling him sweetly. When his gaze finally landed on the intruder, something seemed to flip in his stomach. There was a feeling of almost familiarity as his gaze took in the stranger’s appearance—the navy blue hair which was cut strangely; the eyepatch that covered his right eye and the strange, star shaped pupil in his visible one; the healthy tan skin and the low V-neck shirt he wore beneath a black leather vest. He felt like he should know this man, but the memory still slipped out of his grasp.

“Do you know me?”

“What a strange question,” the intruder drawled. His amusement was clear from the way his lips curled into a smirk. “Usually it’s Do I know you, isn’t it? Then again, you’ve always been special, don’t you?”

“I won’t know, since at the moment I can barely remember anything.” He scoffed. He could feel himself getting irritated by this intruder and his non-answer. “You haven’t answered my question.”

“Hmm. Well, the short answer is: I do, but I don’t think that’ll be satisfying enough for you.”

True, it wasn’t. If anything, it only made more questions appear in his mind. He decided to put them away for now, though. “Who are you?”

“Name’s Kaeya Alberich,” the man made an exaggerated bow. The smirk on his face never once faltered. “Though you may just call me Kaeya.”

“Kaeya,” he tested the name and it rolled too easily on his tongue. “Why are you here?”

“I’m here to pick you up, of course.” Kaeya shrugged as if the answer was obvious—as if they had known each other for years instead of two strangers having their first meeting. “It’s time to go back.”

“Why should I go with you? I don’t even know you and you didn’t answer most of my questions. I have no reason to trust you.”

“Because, despite all that, I’m still the only one who can give you answers, Diluc.” 

Diluc.

The name hit something within him. A sense of belonging and ownership. A familiarity so deep he didn’t have to think about it and Diluc didn’t understand how he could forget it.

“Diluc,” he repeated. His eyes widened slightly. “That’s my name.”

“Indeed it is,” Kaeya’s smirk morphed into a smile. It looked almost melancholic. “Now, will you go back with me?”

This time, when Kaeya reached out his hand, Diluc only needed a moment before finally putting his own on top of it. The skin that touched him was warm. Diluc didn’t know why it surprised him. 

Kaeya brought Diluc back to his home. It was very suspicious, but Diluc couldn’t exactly complain since he didn’t remember where his home was. So he obediently waited until Kaeya put his bike back into the garage before following him into the house.

“Sorry if it’s a bit messy,” Kaeya said as he led them deeper into the kitchen. He put his keys on the kitchen counter carelessly and walked towards the fridge. “You can sit if you want.”

Diluc didn’t bother replying. He was busy taking in the details of his surroundings. Kaeya’s home was small, but it was warm. The kitchen itself was quite tidy though Diluc could see dirty dishes on the sink. There was a dining table in the center, along with two chairs, and Diluc made a mental note that Kaeya might not have lived alone. He kept his observation to himself, though, and finally took a seat as Kaeya suggested.

“Here, for you,” Kaeya said once he’d returned. He put something in front of Diluc before opting to sit on the table near Diluc.

Diluc frowned at that—because there was still one empty chair across from him, but Kaeya’s smirk widened, as if he could read Diluc’s mind perfectly and so he chose to not scold the other. Diluc turned his attention to the thing Kaeya’s given him instead and couldn’t help feeling quite surprised.

“Grape juice? You have something like this in your fridge?” He asked because he was quite certain Kaeya’d prefer wine.

“Well, yeah, since you prefer it to beer or wine.” Kaeya shrugged while drinking his own cold beer. “Personally, I don’t like the taste.”

Again, Kaeya spoke as if they were close friends—or maybe something more because Diluc could sense a hint of fondness in his tone—and it just made Diluc more frustrated.

“Okay, enough games,” Diluc growled, glaring up at Kaeya who seemed unfazed. “What do you know about me? Tell me everything, Kaeya!”

Kaeya levelled Diluc with a look. Even in the face of Diluc’s ire, he was still unruffled. After a while, he finally tilted his head and drawled, “I’m afraid I can’t do that. You see, Diluc, in your current state, I can tell you the most obvious lie about you and you’ll still believe it because you don’t know the truth anyway. Are you sure that’s what you want?”

Diluc reeled back as if Kaeya had punched him despite his calm tone. He wanted to deny Kaeya’s words—that surely he’d still know if Kaeya was spouting lies or that he trusted Kaeya to only tell him the truths—but somehow he knew Kaeya was right.

So he gritted his teeth, hands curling into tight fists atop the table, and forced himself to calm down.

“Then what do you suggest I do?”

Kaeya’s smiled had a hint of pride in it. “Let’s find out how much you actually remember first. We can go from there.”

Diluc didn’t want to tell Kaeya what he remembered because it wasn’t anything good. Still, he could see the logic in Kaeya’s suggestion and it might actually be a good way to stimulate his memories.

“What I remember … is the day of my father’s death,” he started and had to lick his suddenly dry lip. His eyes were firmly on Kaeya’s face, capturing every miniscule change in his expression as he continued, “I remember it being a rainy day. We’re driving in our car—just the two of us—on the highway where you found me when suddenly a band of thieves came out of nowhere and surrounded us. They killed my father and left me injured and … that’s all I can remember.”

“Do you remember your father’s name?” Kaeya asked in a surprisingly soft voice.

“I …,” Diluc racked his brain, trying to come up with something, but failed. He growled in frustration, one hand went up to grip at the side of his head. “No.”

“Crepus,” said Kaeya. “Your father’s name is Crepus. You’re his only child and his biggest pride. It’s hard to forget how often he brags about you.”

As Kaeya spoke, flashes of images appeared in Diluc’s mind. Of a kind father smiling down at him and patting his head. Of warm hands that held him so gently whenever he had a nightmare. Crepus—his father’s image slowly became clearer that instead of a blur of pale corpse, it was gradually replaced by that of a proud father.

Diluc’s grip on his head loosened up and before he realized it tears had dripped down his cheeks. The memories of his own warm past became bittersweet but despite the pain, he still felt very relieved.

Kaeya was silent as he watched Diluc cry. His eye softened and he waited patiently until the other had pulled himself together. 

“Feel better now?”

“Yes,” Diluc sniffled and he should be embarrassed for crying in front of Kaeya, but the other politely looked away and didn’t comment on it and so Diluc’s pride didn’t feel hurt.

“Good! Now then,” Kaeya finished up his beer, jumped down from the table to throw the can away, before turning back to face Diluc once more. This time, the smile on his face was obviously fake. “Let’s go to bed!”

“What? No!” Diluc immediately denied. He still wanted more answers! “I’m not tired and it’s—“

“—already pretty late, so we really should rest.” Kaeya cut in firmly. “Besides, you’ve remembered something new, right? That’s good enough for one day. Come on, Luc, don’t push yourself too hard.”

It was the nickname that made Diluc pause. The warmth he immediately felt when hearing it catching him off guard. There was an image flashing in his mind—a young boy who smiled and laughed so brightly his happiness was contagious—but it appeared only for seconds and left Diluc with a throbbing head instead. 

Diluc hissed, hands grabbing at his head once again  as he rode out the pain. He was so lost in it that he jolted in surprise when he felt warm hands gently covering his.

“Shh, it’s okay,” Kaeya crooned as his fingers threaded through Diluc’s red hair, massaging the scalp and making the pain far more bearable. “It’s okay, take your time. I’m sure everything will return to you someday.” 

On and on, Kaeya’s soothing voice and his warmth enveloped Diluc. His scent, something fresh and flowery, brought about a sense of nostalgia. Slowly, Diluc’s pain subsided. He was still panting from exhaustion, cold sweat making his clothes damp, but at least his head didn’t feel as if it would split apart anymore.

All of the sudden, he felt tired. Diluc slumped forward, head resting against Kaeya’s collarbone where his scent became even stronger. Almost unconsciously he took a deeper breath. His voice brittle as he whispered, 

“Who are you, Kaeya?”

Even as he asked that, though, Diluc didn’t expect any answer. A part of him somehow knew Kaeya wasn’t the type to give direct answers—as been proven from their previous interaction—but he still couldn’t help the question. Kaeya was the key to his current condition—of this Diluc was sure, but he was also the biggest mystery of it.

Kaeya smiled in return, but of course he didn’t say anything. Diluc let out a resigned sigh and closed his eyes. He was too tired right now. The way Kaeya rubbed circles on his back felt pleasant and Diluc allowed himself to indulge in it for a moment longer before finally lifting his head and pushing the other away.

“Ready to rest now?” Kaeya asked as he stepped back to give Diluc more space.

Diluc nodded curtly before standing up from his seat. “Yes. Lead the way.” 

The corner of Kaeya’s lips twitched up, but he held back from saying anything. He simply hummed before turning around and starting to walk towards the bedroom. 

His bedroom.

Diluc stopped once he walked in and threw an unimpressed glare towards Kaeya. He folded his arms. His brows furrowing in a scowl. “I’m not sleeping here.”

“I don’t have a guest room,” Kaeya shrugged. He leaned back against the door frame, seemingly content in watching Diluc and what he’d do next.

“I will not sleep with you.” Diluc snapped. The audacity of this man! Diluc probably should have been more suspicious of him.

That infuriating smirk was back on Kaeya’s face. “Oh, you have a dirty mind,” he drawled and merely chuckled when Diluc actually growled in response. He then held his hands up in placating manner. “Relax. I’m not that bad of a person. I can sleep on the couch tonight. You can take the bed.”

Diluc still looked at the bed skeptically. He debated taking the couch instead, but he couldn’t deny the bone deep exhaustion he felt. He could already feel himself giving in and the worst part of it was the way Kaeya’s eye twinkled as if he could read Diluc’s mind.

Diluc wanted nothing more than to swipe that smug expression out of his face. Thus, he blurted out something he might actually regret should he have the time to think it through:

“Fine, but you’ll join me in bed.”

It was worth it to see Kaeya blinked slowly though. He was obviously taken aback, his eye widened as his brows hit his hairline. For a few seconds, his expression was so open that it gave Diluc so much satisfaction for he knew Kaeya wasn’t the type of person who would let his true feelings show through his mask. He was quick to gather himself, of course, but even just that moment of slip up was enough for Diluc.

“Why, I’d thought you’d be worried about your virginity. Looks like you’re bolder than I expected, Diluc.”

“I can handle myself,” Diluc rolled his eyes. Kaeya was once again trying to deflect the subject. “We’re only going to sleep together in the bed. Literally sleeping together. Touch me once and I will not hesitate to strangle you.”

“Whoa, okay,” Kaeya chuckled again, but if he knew Diluc as well as he suggested, he’d know the threat was genuine and Diluc would absolutely follow through it. “I’ll take up your offer then. Now, do you want to borrow my pajamas or are you fine wearing your current clothes to sleep?”

Diluc looked down at his clothes: a white button up shirt and black pants. He considered for a moment before finally shaking his head. “I don’t need your clothes.” His wasn’t that dirty and though it might be a little bit uncomfortable, it was still better than wearing clothes that’d undoubtedly smell like Kaeya. 

It wasn’t that the other smelt bad. It was actually the exact opposite and Diluc really didn’t need his logic to be clouded by something silly like attraction.

“Suit yourself,” Kaeya shrugged before going to his drawer. “You can go ahead and get yourself comfortable, Diluc.”

Diluc grunted before doing as he was told. He took off his shoes before climbing into the bed. It was a big enough bed for the both of them and though it was a blessing, Diluc couldn’t help feeling rather suspicious about it. He kept his opinion to himself, though, and simply lay down on the left side of the bed. 

Once his head hit the pillow, it was as if all of his exhaustion returned back in tenfold. Diluc let out a sigh, eyes already fluttering shut without his realization. Sleep was a temptress that readily embraced him once he relaxed. He only barely noticed the bed dipped down as Kaeya joined him. With his back towards the other, Diluc couldn’t see what Kaeya was doing, but then he felt another warmth touching his back and found it to be surprisingly pleasant. The warmth also worked as a physical reminder that he wasn’t alone anymore and for once in a long time, Diluc fell asleep surrounded by the feeling of safety.

(Jean Gunhildr had had her fair share of losses. She had lost his family due to circumstances, though she’d forever be grateful they were still alive. As a knight and Acting Grandmaster she had also lost some of his subordinates when missions went terribly wrong. Jean wasn’t a stranger to losses and she thought she’d seen enough of it to become desensitized, but apparently she was wrong.

The infirmary inside Monstadt’s Cathedral had quickly become Jean’s temporary residence for the last three days. If she wasn’t working at the Ordo Favonius’ Headquarters, she’d easily be found there, watching over the most recent patients the Deaconess had received. 

Barbara never questioned her presence and she let her stay for as long as she’d like. It might be due to their familial bond, but Jean was grateful nevertheless.

“Big Sister Jean,” Barbara greeted when Jean entered the infirmary. The Deaconess had a gentle smile on her face although she also looked exhausted.

“Barbara,” Jean returned with a smile of her own. “Thank you for your hard work.” Her gaze slid towards the two unconscious patients on the bed behind her. “How are they?”

“Stable for now. They both are still in critical condition, but I think we can take a bit of a rest tonight.”

“I see.” Jean bit back a sigh. The information Barbara gave her was actually better than expected. “Do you mind if I stay here for a while?”

“Of course not,” Barbara reached out to squeeze Jean’s hands. “You’re always welcomed here, Big Sister. I’ll leave you three for a while, but please don’t hesitate to call if you need anything.”

Jean swallowed a lump in her throat. Her fingers itched to pull Barbara in a tight hug, but all the years they’d spent apart and Jean’s own self-conduct pulled herself back. In the end, she could only offer gratitude for the nth time and hoped it’d be enough. 

Once Barbara had left, Jean took a spare chair and pulled it between the two patients’ beds. Her eyes staring without really seeing the prone bodies lying so dangerously still in them. Almost unconsciously, Jean folded her hands in prayer as she whispered, “Lord Barbatos, I know my prayer has become repetitive these days, but I beg you, please watch over these two. Please guide them back to us. They both have seen too many tragedies within their lives and so I implore you, oh my gracious Archon, please grant them a chance at happiness.”

Her prayer filled the room, but there was only silence in return. Jean sighed, leaning back against the chair as she tried to hold tears back. 

“Please, you two … please open your eyes.”)

Kaeya Alberich opened his eyes and even before he was fully awake, he’d known the spot beside him on the bed would be empty and cold. The memory of last night was still fresh in his mind. All things considered, Kaeya could actually say yesterday had been one of those good days. Diluc had been cooperative. He had actually come back home with Kaeya and they managed to talk before the onslaught of memories became too much for the redhead. Then they had actually slept together in one bed.

Archons, it was both a blessing and a curse to be that close to Diluc but unable to touch him. The warmth of his body; the scent of him and the sheer trust he still showed towards Kaeya—who was a total stranger to him at the moment—had almost been too much for Kaeya to keep up his mask. Usually, Kaeya would be more prepared. He knew to not expect anything from the current Diluc, but then his beloved brother had boldly invited him into the bed and Kaeya thought he’d died instead. 

It was the most progress he’d encountered with Diluc and it had been promising. It gave Kaeya hope that soon Diluc would remember everything and then they’d be able to go back to their lives.

For now, though, Kaeya needed to get up. Diluc would be waiting for him already and he’d wasted enough time. 

As he got ready to pick Diluc up again, Kaeya wondered what would happen this time. Repeating the same scenes over and over again was exhausting and very boring, but at least now it’d become a little bit more interesting.

When Kaeya arrived, Diluc was already standing at the edge of the cliff. Silently, he walked closer, just enough to observe the other and actually caught him should Diluc move faster than Kaeya expected, but not near enough for Diluc to notice him. It was Kaeya’s guilty pleasure—watching Diluc like this, for the other man was really beautiful as he stood alone there, ready to erase his own existence. 

Diluc’s gaze was always vacant as he stared at the bottom of the cliff. There was obvious vulnerability in him that he’d never show otherwise and Kaeya coveted the sight like a thirsty connoisseur. His admiration would last for as long as Diluc was lost in his mind, but when Diluc’s eyes gained light in them, Kaeya knew the moment was broken.

It was Kaeya’s clue to walk closer and raise his voice, so he did. The words that left his mouth never changed at all. 

“Careful there. One more step and you’ll actually fall off the cliff.”

Kaeya made sure to keep his voice light enough. It wouldn't be a good thing to really startle Diluc and Kaeya had learned that lesson the hard way in the beginning. From all the times he’d repeated this scene, Kaeya had only watched Diluc actually fall once, but it was already one time too many. 

As always, Kaeya’s words managed to make Diluc turn around to face him. Their eyes met and Kaeya’s breath still hitch minutely when he became Diluc’s sole focus. The scowl that appeared on the other’s face afterwards was more familiar; the snark in which he replied Kaeya with a comfort he embraced. 

“What if that’s exactly what I want?”

The same line. The unchanging dance.

“You know, no matter how many times I give you the warning, you always give me the same answer. Truly, your dedication is one of a kind.”

Kaeya waited. What happened after usually differed depending on Diluc’s response. Mostly, Kaeya’s words would make him intrigued, which was exactly what Kaeya aimed for, but there was also an off-chance that he’d get angry and run off instead.

This time, Diluc’s eyes narrowed and he folded his arms on his chest, but he kept his attention on Kaeya. Good, it meant this time everything went just as it should be.

“What’s your name?”

“Kaeya. It’s Kaeya Alberich,” said Kaeya. His lips curled into a lazy smirk. Diluc’s question came a bit too early, but it was nothing to be alarmed about. “Though a beauty like you may call me anything you want.”

Kaeya teased because he couldn’t help it and also to gauge Diluc’s reaction. He’d expected the redhead to scold him either in genuine anger or embarrassment. When none of those things happened, Kaeya straightened up. It was a sign something was wrong.

Tilting his head up to meet Diluc’s eyes, Kaeya found that he was still looking at him. Only, Diluc’s gaze wasn’t really focused. It was hazy, almost dazed, and his focus kept flitting between Kaeya’s face to his surroundings. 

“Diluc?” Kaeya called out, worried worming its way to his chest. Even more so when Diluc didn’t react at all by the call of his name. He reached out carefully and when Diluc didn’t pull away from the first touch of Kaeya’s hand on his arm he grabbed onto the other. “Hey, are you okay?”

Diluc blinked. Slowly, his gaze focused back to Kaeya.

“I’m … fine,” said Diluc though he still seemed distracted.

Kaeya let out a sigh. He released his hold on Diluc, missing the way the other narrowed his eyes at that, and rubbed at his neck. “Good. Gee, you worried me for a moment there. It’s not like you to space out.”

“Not like me?” Diluc repeated with a raised brow. “I take it you know me then, Kaeya?”

“In a way, yes,” answered Kaeya and the tension he felt loosened up at the more familiar banter. “At the very least, I know your name, Diluc.”

“Diluc.”

The way the name rolled on Diluc’s tongue was easy and familiar. Kaeya nodded, inwardly amused how Diluc never pressed him for more. Ever since the first time they got stuck in his strange loop, Kaeya never once told Diluc his last name. It’s always been just Diluc and the other accepted it at face value. Truly, sometimes the trust Diluc placed on him borderline on naivety.

“Mhm, that’s you.” Kaeya said with a cheeky grin.

The scowl on Diluc’s face reappeared. He folded his arms on his chest and gave Kaeya a slight glare. “Alright. What are you doing here then, Kaeya? People don’t usually come near a cliff like this.”

“You know I can return that question right back at you, right?” Kaeya chuckled, but he decided to stop teasing for now. “In all seriousness, though, I’m here to pick you up.”

“Why?”

“Because I know you’ll want answers and I can give them to you.”

“Can you really?” Diluc sneered. “Somehow, I have a feeling you’re not the type who’ll give straight answers.”

“Now, now, that’s a rather harsh accusation, don’t you think? Especially since you don’t really know me.”

Diluc raised his brow delicately. His expression was challenging. “Am I wrong, though?”

Kaeya couldn’t hold back a smirk at that. “Not at all. You’re actually right on point. Still,” he shrugged. “I’m your only hope here, Diluc. So, will you come with me?” asked Kaeya as he reached out a hand towards the other. 

Diluc watched the hand as if it’d bite him. His brows were furrowed so deep Kaeya almost worried they’d leave a permanent mark. He kept his smirk firm on his face, though, and held his hand still. 

Moments passed by in which Kaeya could actually see Diluc’s internal debate. He wasn’t worried, though, because he knew Diluc and he’d certainly take Kaeya’s hand. 

Admittedly, it took Diluc a longer time than usual to finally reach a decision. He still seemed distracted by something—which Kaeya still couldn’t tell what exactly—but he finally took a deep breath as if steeling himself before putting his own callused hand atop Kaeya’s.

The warmth of Diluc’s hand on his always managed to make Kaeya’s heart skip a beat. His smile turned a lot more sincere as he grabbed hold of the one he considered to be the most precious thing in the world.

“Alright, then. Let’s go home.”

Diluc was quiet for the whole journey to Kaeya’s home, which wasn’t at all unusual, but the way he actually kept holding onto Kaeya’s waist until they arrived was. To say Kaeya was getting worried would be a vast understatement, but he couldn’t let it affect him. Especially not when he still didn’t know whether this would lead to something good or bad.

So Kaeya kept silent and pretended the warmth of Diluc’s hands didn’t feel as if it weren’t seared on his skin even through fabrics. He’d … forgotten how long it had been since they were actually this close—not counting last night where they slept together but barely touching—and it was almost embarrassing how Kaeya longed for more.

His heart felt as if it wanted to leap out of his chest. Kaeya could only hope Diluc wouldn’t be able to feel it.

When they finally arrived, Kaeya actually felt disappointed, but he cleared his throat before turning off his bike and taking off his helmet.

“Okay, we’re here.” He announced with a grin. “Get in first while I park the bike. The door’s not locked.” 

“Hn.”

Kaeya heard Diluc's response and felt the way the bike became lighter once the other got off. He waited for a moment, but Diluc didn't move at all. The redhead seemed content to just stand at the side while folding his arms.

"What, you're not going to enter? I've told you it's not locked."

Diluc scowled. "It's impolite just to barge into someone's home when the owner's not inside."

"Seriously?" Kaeya let out a disbelieving laugh. "I've explicitly given you the permission to get in, Diluc. Was that not enough? Do you need a formal invitation too?"

The glare Kaeya received for that teasing was well deserving, but it was worth it to see the faint dusting of pink on Diluc's cheeks as the result. Diluc's jaw tightened and Kaeya imagined he could hear the sound of teeth grinding together as Diluc gritted out:

"Just … get on with it. I'll wait here."

"Okay, okay, suit yourself." Still chuckling, Kaeya did as he was told. Thankfully, he didn't need a long time to park his bike in the garage. Within minutes, he was already back to Diluc's side with his usual smirk firmly in place.

"Alright, now I can property escort you to my humble home." He said with a mocking bow. "Thank you for your patience."

Diluc scoffed. He rolled his eyes before turning around to finally walk forward. However, Kaeya still managed to catch the way Diluc's lips twitched upward in a faint smile and it was enough to make his heart soared.

The front door was indeed unlocked when Kaeya tried to open it and he led Diluc through the main hall and to the kitchen.

"Just sit wherever you want, Diluc. Oh, and I hope you don't mind the mess." He said as he went to the refrigerator to grab some drinks for them. 

When Diluc failed to respond, Kaeya finally turned around with a can of grape juice in hand. He tilted his head in confusion when Diluc was merely standing still in the doorway, his complexion paler than usual as he looked around.

"Diluc?" Kaeya called out, frowning at Diluc's strange behaviour. He approached the redhead, putting the grape juice on the table along the way, and stopped directly in front of him. "Hey. What's wrong, Luc?" 

Immediately, Diluc's attention snapped to him as a strangled sob slipped from his lips. There was desperation in his eyes and the sight made Kaeya's heart twisted painfully.

"Hey," Once again Kaeya called out softly. His hand was steady as he moved to cup Diluc's cheek. A part of Kaeya expected Diluc to step back or even to slap his hand away, but to his surprise he was leaning into the touch instead. "Are you okay?"

"Kaeya," Diluc breathed. "Are you real?"

The question was so unexpected that Kaeya immediately took in a sharp breath. Oh, he thought, something's certainly changing.

"I'm real, Diluc," Kaeya answered with a bitter twist of lips. "At least … I'm as real as anything in this world is."

Diluc narrowed his eyes, knowing there was a hidden meaning behind Kaeya's words but couldn't exactly tell what it was. So instead he grabbed Kaeya's wrist and said, "Prove it then."

"Prove it?"

"Yes. Show me that you're real; that you're not just a figment of my imagination and that I'm not going crazy."

Kaeya lifted his brow. "And how exactly do I do it?"

Even as he asked that, though, Kaeya wasn't really sure what he expected. Thus, he was caught off guard when Diluc suddenly pulled at his wrist, making him stumble forward, and he absolutely couldn't prepare himself when soft lips suddenly touched his.

Kaeya’s eye widened at the first brush of their lips, but the feeling was so familiar and he missed it too damn much that instead of pulling away like what his logic told him to do, Kaeya reached out to bury his fingers in Diluc’s soft mane instead and returned the kiss eagerly. He nibbled at Diluc’s bottom lip and slipped his tongue inside the other’s mouth when Diluc let out a groan. A shudder ran through Kaeya’s body at the first taste of Diluc that seemed to burst on his tongue. It awakened a hunger long forgotten and Kaeya wanted.

However, Diluc wasn’t the type who’d just let people take from him and so, even in a kiss, he fought back harder. His movement was sloppy and clearly inexperienced, but when he sucked on Kaeya’s tongue, Kaeya swore his knees went weak.

It was Kaeya who pulled away from the kiss first. Something he’d admit was harder than he thought, but at least he’d finally managed to grasp some sense before they went too far.

When Kaeya looked at Diluc, the other was panting hard. His face flushed red and his lips swollen from their kiss. He looked absolutely angelic. Kaeya wanted to devour him whole, but he held himself back.

“Is this what you want, Diluc?” Kaeya asked because he would never do anything that Diluc would regret in the end.

Diluc’s eyes still looked dazed, but his hold on Kaeya’s arms tightened and when he spoke there was determination and also desperation mixed in one.

“Yes. Yes, I want this, Kaeya. I want—no, I need you to touch me. I need you to be real.” 

Kaeya’s eye narrowed minutely. Diluc’s words rang a warning bell inside his mind. This wasn’t something normal. There must be a trigger to it, but for now Kaeya would  just store that piece of information away.

He’d never been able to deny any of Diluc’s wish after all.

“Then come,” Kaeya smiled. His fingers untangled from Diluc’s hair and moved to grasp his hands instead. Kaeya intertwined their fingers together before stepping into Diluc’s space, his knee slotting perfectly between Diluc’s legs and just barely brushing against his crotch. Delight filled Kaeya when he saw Diluc’s eyes dilated at that and the next words he said came out as a low purr, “let’s go to my room. We shall do this properly there.”

Needless to say, Diluc willingly obliged.

Kaeya couldn’t really remember their journey towards his bedroom. All that he recalled was Diluc’s kisses and touches on his skin. His fingers seared heat and marked Kaeya in ways no one ever did. Their clothes were scattered on the floor along the way and when they both finally fell on the bed with Diluc straddling Kaeya, they were both down to their undergarments.

“How do you want to do this?” Kaeya asked between kisses. His hands caressed every inch of skin he could reach, moving downward until they could grab and squeeze the globes of Diluc’s ass.

Diluc let out a pretty moan. His back arching as he grinded down against Kaeya. “J-just lay down like this.”

“Okay,” Kaeya agreed easily. He captured Diluc’s lips in yet another kiss, greedy and never satisfied to get a taste of the other. “Anything you want, Luc.”

Kaeya could feel Diluc shiver from his easy acceptance. Then the redhead broke their kiss, his lips trailed down to make their way towards Kaeya’s neck with bites and nips instead and when Diluc worried the soft skin just beneath his ear, Kaeya couldn’t help the gasp that escaped from him or the way his hips jerked up almost unconsciously.

Diluc’s lips curled into a smug smirk. He bit on that spot harder, delighting in the way Kaeya actually whimpered, and only stopped when he was sure he’d leave a bruise. Then he moved lower, his hands cupping Kaeya’s pectorals while his mouth latched onto his nipple and sucked hard. A guttural groan from Kaeya sent a jolt of arousal straight to his cock which had started to leak precum. 

“Fuck, yes, Luc,” Kaeya moaned when Diluc pinched the other nipple and twisted it harshly. His hands scrambled at Diluc’s broad shoulders, desperate to hold on something to anchor himself. He lifted his chest up, giving more of himself to Diluc; completely willing to succumb to the pleasure.

Diluc hummed before finally releasing Kaeya’s nipple, leaving it red and wet, as he moved back up to capture Kaeya’s mouth in an open kiss.

“I want you, Kaeya.” Diluc panted against Kaeya’s lips. “I want you to fill me up; to fuck me so hard that I’ll finally be certain that this is real.”

“Anything, Luc. Anything for you,” he promised once again and it was the truth. Diluc could ask Kaeya to tear his heart out and he’d gladly do it without a second thought.

(He’d done it once and he’d do it a thousand more times.)

Diluc’s eyes softened and Kaeya wanted to cry.

“Thank you,” Diluc said so very gently as he bestowed a kiss to Kaeya’s forehead. The sheer warmth in that gesture was enough to make Kaeya’s breath hitch and his heart twisted painfully. Thus, he was grateful when Diluc finally moved away only long enough to discard the last piece of their clothings.

“Lube?”

“Second drawer.”

Diluc stretched out to take the lube. He found it shortly and returned to straddle Kaeya. Then Diluc pulled his knees to his chest, his legs spread apart so he was completely exposed to Kaeya whose mouth suddenly went dry. Without taking his eyes off of the dark haired man, Diluc opened the lube’s cap and squeezed a generous amount of it to his hand. He hissed at the first breach of his finger in his asshole, the sensation foreign enough he needed time to adjust, but it didn’t stop him from putting in the second one. It burnt at first, but as he slowly moved his fingers in and out, the burn lessened until it became quite pleasurable instead.

Meanwhile, Kaeya could only watch, mesmerized, as Diluc prepared himself hastily. His eye was drawn to the movement of Diluc’s fingers, watching the digits going in and out of Diluc’s body and he thought he could’ve cum just from the sight alone. 

Kaeya longed to touch. He wanted—oh, how he wanted—to replace Diluc’s fingers with his own. To feel the way Diluc’s body sucked him in, the velvety heat so tight and just right, but he knew he didn’t have a part in this now. No, this was all about Diluc. In a twisted way, this was something Diluc needed to do to tether him to this world and though Kaeya wasn’t sure it was a good thing, he was more afraid of what would happen if Diluc broke too early.

So he stayed still and just watched as Diluc finished preparing himself. Kaeya held his breath when Diluc opened his eyes and their gazes met. The sheer passion in those red orbs seemed to suck him in as Diluc positioned himself atop Kaeya’s erection and slowly—almost painfully so—lowered himself down on it.

Kaeya’s breath hitched and it was trapped in his chest. The sheer feeling of Diluc’s (too tight, too much) heat enveloping him inch by inch overwhelmed him. His eye squeezed shut unbidden. Kaeya’s fingers twisted on the bed sheet as he held himself back from thrusting up with all of his might. The pleasure was delightfully excruciating. When Diluc was finally seated fully on his lap, Kaeya’s let out a shuddering breath.

“Fuck.” — that was all he could say.

Diluc gave a small smirk. His arms were trembling; his face flushed deep red as if he was having a fever and it took him some time to finally be capable of moving again.

Kaeya’s hands found a place on Diluc’s waist as the redhead started to slowly bounce in his lap. All the time, Kaeya kept his eye firmly on Diluc’s face, catching in every little detail painted there. Diluc fucked himself with clear desperation. Despite the intimacy of their act, his back was bowed in a hunch; his expression pinched as if he was in as much pain as pleasure. Each breath that left his mouth came in shuddering gasp and Kaeya had never seen Diluc so vulnerable before.

Almost instinctively, Kaeya’s hand moved to rub soothing circles on Diluc’s back. He then lifted himself up, cupping Diluc’s face, and when Diluc’s focus was finally back at him, Kaeya kissed him very gently. Diluc moaned and demanded more. Kaeya was more than happy to oblige.

Soon, Diluc’s fingers buried themselves in Kaeya’s soft locks, clawing and pulling as their kiss turned more ravenous. His rhythm faltered and, with a growl, Kaeya gripped at Diluc’s hips to help him move. Unable to stay docile anymore, Kaeya thrusted his hips up everytime Diluc sank down and the force of it finally managed to tear a loud gasp from the redhead.

“A-ah! K-Kaeya, t-there! Ngh, don’t stop!”

Each demand from Diluc sounded like a song to Kaeya and who was he to deny the master what he wanted? Kaeya had always been a slave to Diluc’s desire and this time wasn’t any different. Just as Diluc asked, Kaeya didn’t stop. He thrusted harder instead, abusing that one spot in Diluc’s body relentlessly until he was sobbing messily. Diluc’s erection had been constantly leaking precum from where it was stuck between their bodies and Kaeya knew he wouldn’t last long.

“Are you close, Diluc? Will you cum for me, my dear? Will you let me see you being consumed by pleasure?”

“Yes!” Diluc sobbed. His breath hitched when Kaeya suddenly slammed harder into him. Tears had leaked from his eyes. It stained his cheeks and mixed with the saliva on his chin. He looked debauched, but right now Diluc couldn’t give a care for appearance. “I-I’m close. I wanna cum. Please let me cum, Kaeya!”

Kaeya groaned. Diluc’s pleas only made him even more aroused. In one swift movement, Kaeya sneaked a hand between them to grab at Diluc’s cock. His rubbed it once and then twisted the head harshly as he growled:

“Then cum. Cum for me, Diluc.”

That was all Diluc needed. With a harsh cry, his body jerked and tensed as he finally reached his climax. Warm cum spurted out of his cock, painting Kaeya’s chest in white and dripping messily onto his hand; Diluc’s body clamped down hard, pushing Kaeya onto his own orgasm, his seed spilling deep within the Ragnvindr. Still, Kaeya didn’t stop rubbing at Diluc’s slowly flagging cock, stimulating him even as he rode out his high until finally he squirmed in discomfort.

“Ngh, t-too much,” Diluc whined, weakly pushing Kaeya away.

Despite his desire to see Diluc totally wretched, Kaeya did stop. He took his hand off of Diluc’s cock and instead gathered him into an embrace. Diluc went without a fight as Kaeya lay back down onto the bed. They basked in the aftermath for a while; Diluc seemed content enough to rest his head atop Kaeya’s chest, eyes fluttered shut as Kaeya’s clever fingers carded through his hair. Kaeya hadn’t pulled out yet, but the feeling of being stuffed full only made Diluc more satisfied.

“Do you feel better?” Kaeya asked in a soft whisper.

“Mm.” Diluc answered noncommittally.

Kaeya let out a chuckle. “Are you convinced that I’m real now?”

There was a pause before Diluc responded. “At the moment. Just … let us stay like this for a while.”

“Of course.” Kaeya easily agreed. He kept on caressing Diluc’s hair until he felt him slowly relaxed once more. “We can stay like this for as long as you want.” In fact, Kaeya wouldn’t even mind if this moment was frozen in time.

“We’ll still need to clean up eventually,” Diluc said, ever the responsible one. Kaeya didn’t need to see his face to know he was rolling his eyes. Still, he didn’t move an inch. “But for now … this is enough.”

Kaeya hummed but didn’t give a verbal response. The silence that fell between them afterwards was comfortable. For once, Kaeya didn’t feel the need to break it with meaningless words. He just kept holding Diluc close and soaking in his warmth. Soon, he could feel Diluc’s grip on his going slack, the other’s breath gone deep as he succumbed into slumber and the love Kaeya felt in that moment was immeasurable.

Carefully, he moved so that Diluc could lay more comfortably on the bed, slipping out of the other as he did so. Kaeya’s eye drifted to the way his spent trickled from Diluc’s hole unbidden. A sense of wonder and no little amount of smugness filling him. Still, he knew it wouldn’t be comfortable for Diluc—he might not complain about it right now, but Kaeya was sure should he wake up while in this filthy state, Diluc would be furious—and so Kaeya started to get up … or at least he attempted to, because the moment he moved away from Diluc, the redhead let out a discontent grunt and latch onto him with his arms and legs, rendering Kaeya practically immobile.

“Oh, come on, Luc,” Kaeya sighed though he wasn’t really trying to get away. He’d almost forgotten, but Diluc did have the tendency to turn into a clingy octopus whenever they slept together. In the past, Kaeya was used to it. “You’re so going to hate me when we woke up.”

The only response Diluc gave was slight furrowing of his brows. He then curled closer, face buried on Kaeya’s chest, as his grip became tighter.

Another sigh escaped from Kaeya before he let himself fall back down onto the bed. “Alright, alright,” he said in resignment. “We can stay like this. It’s not like you’ll actually be here in the morning anyway.”

The last part was said in a bitter whisper. If Diluc were awake, he’d see the slight crack in Kaeya’s mask right then; a hint of his real feeling slipping through his tight control, but thankfully the redhead remained dead to the world.

Kaeya spent hours in the silence simply watching Diluc, marvelling at the beauty in his arms, and once again hit by the realization that he’d do anything just to keep this man’s happiness.

Without words, Kaeya put his chin atop Diluc’s head and just breathe deeply. He soaked in Diluc’s warmth like that before letting his eye slowly closed. He’d love to stay awake for as long as he could; to prolong this moment before tomorrow came and took Diluc away from him once again, but in the end exhaustion won against him.

The first thing Diluc noticed even before opening his eyes was the warmth surrounding him. It enveloped him completely, making him feel safe and content, and he snuggled deeper into the heat source unconsciously. Diluc’s body still felt tired, but awareness was already creeping up to him and before long his eyes fluttered open.

When he greeted the world again, Diluc expected to be standing at the edge of a cliff, which was a really strange thought to have first thing in the morning, but still his body tensed with anticipation. His brain caught up with his sight moments later though and the tension melted from him immediately when he realized he wasn’t staring into a deep, dark abyss.

No, instead of that Diluc was greeted with the sight of someone’s naked chest very close to him. He blinked, astounded, before slowly pushing himself away from the other occupant of the bed—whom he had been clinging quite tightly in his sleep, Diluc noted with no small amount of embarrassment.

He sat up on the bed, hissing at the soreness of his body, and casted his gaze around the room he was currently in. He didn’t really remember what had happened yesterday—though he could make a guess from his and his partner’s current state—but as he looked down to the other’s sleeping face, pieces of memories started to resurface.

The world around him blurred all of the sudden, followed by a sharp pain in his head that made him groan as he shut his eyes, and the sound was enough to arouse his partner from his sleep.

“Diluc?” A velvet voice still heavy with sleep called out before a hand reached up to pet his head clumsily. “Are you okay?”

Diluc whimpered. The pain in his head intensified until it felt as if his brain would split in two. The pain was so terrible that Diluc actually felt nauseous with it and the flashes of images—of a young boy, body so thin and fragile that Diluc’s first instinct was to protect him; of the same boy, smiling shyly for the first time as if he wasn’t sure he was allowed to be happy; of a laughter so soft and gentle it felt like a breeze as they both stumbled down muddy hills—didn’t help at all.

With a lurch, Diluc retched and dry heaved to the side of the bed. Nothing really came out—thankfully—but the pain was simply too much that he couldn’t hold back the tears. 

Then Diluc felt himself gently pulled back into a loose hug. His back was pressed flushed against firm chest as soothing words were murmured against his ear.

“Shh, it’s okay. You’re going to be okay, Diluc. Don’t fight it. Just let everything come back to you slowly. I promise I’ll be here for you. For as long as you need me.”

Diluc … remembered—the way the world seemed distorted around him yesterday; of himself, once again standing at the edge of a cliff ready to let himself fall when someone called out to him; of seeing him for the first time (or was it really?) and how he was like a burst of color in a monochrome world—a dissonance with everything around them—that Diluc couldn’t help but to feel compelled to follow him.

Above all that, though, he remembered a name. Not one of his own, but more important—more precious—than anything he’d ever known. Diluc parted his lips, voice trembling and far too soft as he called out—

“Kaeya.”

(I’d loved you once.)

— and the hands around him tightened. Face buried against his shoulder; the scent of Calla Lilies invaded his nostrils and made him dizzy, as Kaeya returned his call.

“I’m here, Luc. I’m here and we’ll both go home soon.”

Diluc thought he’d given a smile at the words, but he couldn’t be sure. All of the sudden he felt drained despite only just waking up, and in the safety of Kaeya’s arms Diluc allowed himself to give in. This time, though, he knew it’d be the last for when he woke up next, everything would finally end.

(Aether stood at the edge of Starsnatch Cliff, gazing without really seeing at the end. Beside him, Paimon floated idly. The little fairy was quiet for once, the atmosphere far too gloomy for idle chatter, though her face clearly showed her worry. Any other time, Aether would have said something to ease his most loyal companion’s mind, but this time he felt too tired to even fake a cheer. 

“You shouldn’t dwell on the matter too much, Traveler. We’re going to fight the Abyss soon. There’ll be time to mourn.”

Aether turned slightly just so he could take in Dainsleif’s appearance beside him. There was truth in his words, but Aether didn’t want to acknowledge it yet.

“The Heart of Abyss,” Aether spoke instead. “Do we really need it?”

“Unfortunately. The Heart is the key to unlock the path towards Celestia. Without it, all of our fights until now will be useless.”

“I see,” Aether’s hands curled into tight fists. “I just … hope there’ll be an easier way to do this.”

Dainsleif was quiet for a moment before he walked closer towards Aether. His voice was noticeable softer as he replied, “No one can escape from fate. He knows this too. I’m sure he’ll have no regret.” 

There was no answer from Aether. He just looked back at the edge of the cliff. A single tear rolled down his cheek, prompting Paimon to squeak and hovered closer to him.

Dainsleif let out a soft sigh. He reached out to clasp Aether’s shoulder. The gesture warm and comforting. “If you really must, take this time to let out your feelings, but never drown in it. We still have a future to protect. We need to fight until the very end for everyone’s part. It’d do you good to remember it. I’m sure your sister would have said the same thing, Aether.”

Without waiting for a reply, Dainsleif pulled his hand away and started to walk back towards Mondstadt. He’d give Aether privacy—or as much of it with Paimon always staying beside him—as he believed Aether would be able to pull himself together in the end.)

Diluc woke up blanketed with a sense of calm. His mind was finally settled after what seemed like a very long time. He basked in the feeling for a moment, taking in everything that had happened. He remembered now. He remembered everything and it was only in pieces anymore. His name came to him as easy as breathing; his memory no longer fractured and in them, Kaeya’s image was always the brightest one.

Kaeya.

Kaeya Alberich.

Cavalry Captain of Monstadt’s Knight of Favonius.

Diluc’s once sworn-brother. His betrayer. Someone who held his heart in his palm and had torn it apart. Someone whom, despite everything, Diluc still couldn’t live without.

(At least that was the truth once.)

“Are you awake?”

Diluc wasn’t at all surprised when he heard Kaeya’s voice. Even with his eyes closed, he’d felt the other’s presence beside him, watching over him so dilligently like a guarding dog; a constant warmth Diluc was familiar with. He wanted to stretch the silence longer, but now that the peace had been shattered, Diluc knew that was no longer an option.

“Yeah,” said Diluc. His voice scratchy from sleep. He opened his eyes and turned his head to look up at Kaeya who was sitting on a chair he’d pulled to the bedside. Kaeya looked beautiful as always. His eye soft and fond as he returned Diluc’s gaze, lips quirked up in a small, content smile and Diluc's chest felt so very heavy.

Diluc licked his lips. “How long was I out for?”

“I don’t know. I didn’t keep track of time.” Kaeya shrugged. “Does it matter anyway? You remember now, don’t you?”

“I do,” said Diluc and oh how he hated to admit that. In that moment, he realized how fickle a thing human’s heart was. Diluc had been desperate to get his memories back, but now that it actually happened, he wished to turn back time instead. “I remember … Kae.”

Kaeya let out a hum. He leaned forward, chin resting atop his palm, as he watched Diluc closely. “You know what to do then.”

Diluc knew, but he didn’t want to. 

“We can stay here.” He tried though he knew it was a pathetic attempt.

Mercifully, Kaeya didn’t laugh. He did look sad at that, though, and Diluc couldn’t tell whether it was better or not.

“Oh, Sunshine,” Kaeya breathed and in that moment Diluc hated him so much. Still, the redhead leaned into his touch when Kaeya caressed his cheek. “You know you’ll hate that.”

“I know.” It still didn’t mean Diluc couldn’t hope for that.

Kaeya fell silent. He waited, most patiently, for Diluc to accept the cruel reality. His face was uncharacteristically open in his love and adoration. Diluc knew then that this was the most naked he’d ever seen Kaeya.

The honesty was what prompted Diluc to finally sigh—to admit his defeat—and he sat up, biting back a whine when Kaeya dropped his hand in response.

“I’m … sorry.” Diluc said in a hushed whisper.

“For what?”

For so many things, Diluc wanted to say. For letting anger consume me when you came clean; for abandoning you and running away; for being dishonest even when we finally met again; for being a coward I couldn’t say this to you sooner—

(Diluc remembered Starsnatch Cliff being as beautiful as Kaeya’d said. The clear sky offered them an ocean of stars, each of them bright enough to sear their image into Diluc’s mind.

Diluc remembered Kaeya standing in front of him. From his lips words about their final battle spilled; ancient knowledge only his people was privileged to—a certain way to reach Celestia and to end the war.

Diluc remembered Kaeya’s smile—so beautiful yet broken—as he told Diluc one request. His very last one.

Diluc remembered—and he wished he didn’t—as Kaeya took off his eyepatch, showing him a black abyss in place of his eye, and how the darkness had spread onto him. It was all consuming, he’d said, and soon there’d be nothing left of him.

So Diluc—Diluc didn’t have any choice, did he? He’d tried. He’d shouted, yelled, fought, even begged in the end, but it was all futile.

No one could escape from fate — they said and so Diluc didn’t have any choice but to fulfill Kaeya’s last request.)

—for hating you and your selfish wish. 

Diluc couldn’t possibly vocalize all of that without being drowned by his feelings, though, and so he settled for a simple:

“For everything.” 

It didn’t matter. Kaeya’d understand—he did understand for his eye twinkled and the hand that pushed him forward into a deep, long kiss was so gentle Diluc felt like breaking. Their kiss tasted like tears, but Diluc couldn’t tell which one of them shed it first. His eyes once again fluttered close as he gave into the kiss, letting himself fall into Kaeya’s embrace as the world twisted and wrapped around them.

When they broke the kiss, Diluc could tell they were back at where everything started—at the edge of a cliff, just one step away from completely falling down. He was back in his clothes—his Mondstadt clothes—with Kaeya still holding him and nothing else mattered to Diluc except for his warmth.

“Ready to face the world now, Master Diluc?”

Diluc thought about Kaeya—his Kaeya—and the last smile he was given by the other man. He thought of a world without Kaeya in it and found the answer.

“No, but I can’t keep running away.”

“That’s right. You’ll need to keep fighting, Diluc. Raise up once more, my darling phoenix, and fight for my part too.”

“I promise we will meet again, Kae. I won’t let you be alone anymore.”

Kaeya’s smile never changed. He cups Diluc’s cheek and let their lips brush tenderly once more.

“No need to rush to fulfill that promise. I can assure you ... I have no regret in my life.”

Diluc sucked in a breath. He hadn’t known how bad he needed to hear those words. “I see. That’s ... good. I’m really glad to hear it.”

“Mhm. Well then, Master Diluc,” Kaeya stepped away and gently pushed Diluc’s chest back. The star in his eye twinkled with his smile. “Until we meet again.”

The push tipped Diluc’s balance off. He could feel his feet slipped, but he didn’t fight it as his body started to fall. He kept his eyes opened instead, stubbornly trying to keep Kaeya in his sight even as he continued to fall deep, deeper and deeper into the dark.

Diluc woke up with a wretched gasp. It was as if he’d been drowning all this time and was just now breaking the surface. He lurched up from the bed, barely registering the alarmed shout from Mondstadt’s Deaconess, as his eyes frantically searched for Kaeya.

When he finally found him—lying so still on the bed beside him—Diluc forced his stiff body to move. There were arms trying to hold him down, but Diluc was a knight. He’d trained for all of his life and he wielded a claymore so even in his weakened state, pushing the medics off of him was as easy as swatting a fly.

His desperation only fueled him on. He stumbled off of the bed, his legs not cooperating after being immobile for so long and he fell hard to the ground. He couldn’t feel the pain though and when his legs still refused to move, Diluc crawled until he could reach Kaeya’s bed. 

His arms trembled when he lifted himself up onto the bed and he practically collapsed atop Kaeya. Diluc was panting hard. His medical gown drenched with cold sweat and his sight was getting blurry at the edge. All of that didn’t matter though as he touched Kaeya’s face, finding the skin beneath deadly cold and he took in a shaky breath.

Diluc laid his head atop Kaeya’s chest, catching the very faint flutter of the other’s heartbeat—the only proof that Kaeya was still struggling. Diluc’s hand curled against Kaeya’s shirt. He closed his eyes as the first tear rolled down his face. Thankfully, none of the medics tried to pull him away. They seemingly noticed that this was something Diluc needed to do.

(That this was Diluc’s final goodbye.)

“It’s alright, Kaeya,” Diluc whispered. His voice was steady. ”I’m here now. I’ll be alright, so you ... you don’t have to fight anymore. I will finish this. For us.”

Kaeya didn’t give him any answer—Diluc didn’t expect any miracle—but he’d like to imagine Kaeya smiling down at him for one last time as he stayed there until the sound of Kaeya’s heartbeats faded into nothingness.

((The heart of the Abyss, willingly given, shall be the light that guides you far above.))