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If one good thing could be said about being housebound with a broken leg, it was that Osomatsu, already in the negatives about what was expected of him, was not obligated to do anything around the house. He was exempt from chores that he was already probably not going to do, and he just got to sit around doing nothing, which he was already a professional at.
It got old real fast, though. Being a lazy piece of shit by choice was freeing, gave him agency! Doing nothing because he just couldn't do much of anything was different! Sure, he didn't really mind chilling out on the couch with their mother when she watched a marathon of romantic period drama movies—he secretly liked those kinds of movies, and he did like spending time with his mother when she wasn't mad at him. But even that got boring after a while, especially when his brothers all decided to take advantage of the nice day outside and left the house (except for Ichimatsu, who was asleep in a sunbeam on the carpet) and then even Matsuyo abandoned him to go run errands. She left the television remote out of reach, so when the loneliness set in while watching a samurai exchange a stoic goodbye in the rain with his lover, Osomatsu couldn't even change the channel to watch Jackass or whatever.
Abandonment descended on Osomatsu like a pall. He loved to feel sorry for himself. Their father's smokes were within reach, though, and Osomatsu was helpless to do anything else. He glowered at the couple onscreen falling into one another's arms and lit a cigarette.
"Will you put that out? You're making everything reek," Ichimatsu finally grumbled after long while, sitting up and squinting at Osomatsu through the smoky haze. "You don't even smoke that much. What are you doing?"
Osomatsu crumpled the emptied cigarette pack in his fist and chucked it at the couple sucking face on the television screen. There weren't even any tits visible. PG-13 bullshit. "Trying to get cancer faster."
"Well, don't drag me down with you. Ugh." Ichimatsu shuffled over to the window and slid it open to air out the room. He picked up the overflowing ashtray and emptied it into the garbage. Osomatsu was depressed.
"This sucks!" he groaned, kicking his uninjured leg despairingly. "I can't do anything with my leg broken like this! I can't go to pachinko, I can't go to the racetrack, I can't even go on a walk for some fresh air!"
"You can do literally all of those things. Your crutches are supposed to help."
"But it's so much more work," Osomatsu complained. He glared at his crutches leaning against the arm of the couch. Petulantly, he pushed them so they fell over with a dull clatter. "They're hard to use, and I'm super clumsy with them."
"You're clumsy with them because you won't practice with them, and you won't practice with them because it's hard, which it wouldn't be if you practiced," Ichimatsu said, mercilessly deadpan. "Are you seeing the loop here, Osomatsu-niisan?"
He was being too cruel, so Osomatsu ignored him. On the television screen, the lovebirds were continuing to kiss passionately in the rain. Ichimatsu settled back into his spot on the floor in the corner, on his stomach with his hands folded under his chin like a cat. He stared at Osomatsu in a way that made Osomatsu feel distinctly observed. Ichimatsu might as well have been a cat with its tail flicking rapidly. Osomatsu crossed his arms.
"Doesn't it bother you," he began, because he was insistent on feeling sorry for himself, "that none of us have ever kissed anyone?" He gestured to the TV.
Ichimatsu didn't look at the TV. He said, "Apart from each other?"
Osomatsu barely acknowledged that. He flailed his hand at the screen again, more aggressively. The guy practically had the girl's chin in his mouth. "I mean like that! I know I've said it before but it's really such bullshit that none of us have ever even gotten, like, a teeny tiny little smooch off of anyone like that!"
"Do you mean anyone, or just a girl?" Ichimatsu asked. Osomatsu looked at him. Ichimatsu's cat tail was out, and it was flicking rapidly. He had his ears out, too. Osomatsu smothered a small feeling of alarm.
"What do you mean?"
"You always say we've never kissed a girl, not never kissed anyone."
It took a few long moments of rusty cogs struggling to turn in Osomatsu's brain before he tried and failed to sit up straight on the couch, staring incredulously at his brother. "Wait, who have you kissed?!"
"Yanagida," Ichimatsu said. His tail flicked back and forth. "In high school."
Intelligently, Osomatsu said, "Wasn't that a guy?"
"Yes." Ichimatsu narrowed his eyes at him. "Broaden your horizons a little, nii-san. Maybe you'd get luckier. You should know first-hand guys are nasty and have low standards."
He had a point. Osomatsu sagged back into the couch, flabbergasted. He didn't know how to feel about this revelation. Mostly he just felt betrayed that one of his little brothers had secretly had kissing experience this whole time when he hadn't. Even Totty didn't have that experience! Or had he?! No, probably not…
Ichimatsu got up on his hands and knees and stretched, catlike. It probably would have been cute if he hadn't started crawling across the carpet towards Osomatsu in a way that made Osomatsu feel like a bug that an overgrown housecat was about to pounce on. The ears and tail were really putting Osomatsu on edge; those only came out when Ichimatsu was spooked, or otherwise Activated™. Osomatsu, for once, hadn't antagonized Ichimatsu, so he was kind of nervous.
Ichimatsu came closer, elbowed Osomatsu's cast leg out of the way to get between his thighs, and sprawled his upper body on top of Osomatsu's torso, crushing his balls a little under his chest and forcing a pained grunt out of Osomatsu. Typical shitty cat behavior. Osomatsu glared half-heartedly at his brother, who had his chin on Osomatsu's sternum. His eyes were still lazy and half-lidded, but his pupils were big and dark, and his tail was still flicking around.
"What?" Osomatsu grumbled, a little self-conscious about his genital situation, sore as they were. He could feel Ichimatsu's steady, heavy heartbeat in his crotch in this position. He lifted a hand and rubbed Ichimatsu's hair and fuzzy ears, hoping to quell whatever feline mischief was percolating in Ichimatsu's brain. Playful cats were cute and all, but not if it resulted in getting the shit scratched out of him for no reason. Some cats would do that!
Luckily, Ichimatsu's eyes slid shut and he started purring. That felt interesting between Osomatsu's legs. He squirmed a little and coughed awkwardly. Ichimatsu's eyes opened.
"Do you want to get some kissing experience?"
"If we're gonna get technical and include dudes and include brothers, then I already have experience thanks to you," Osomatsu said, smothering his anxiety down and flicking Ichimatsu sharply on his nose. Ichimatsu hissed and rubbed at where he'd struck him, but he didn't move away.
"There would be significantly less mucus and rhinovirus involved this time," Ichimatsu promised. "Little brother's honor."
Osomatsu burst out laughing, the strange nervousness subsiding to more comfortable levels. He was certain that Ichimatsu didn't know just how silly he was sometimes. Osomatsu squeezed Ichimatsu's cheeks affectionately in his hands. "You don't have an honorable bone in your body, Ichimacchan!"
"That's true," Ichimatsu conceded. He scooted himself up a little further, his chest and stomach sliding up between Osomatsu's legs. "Wanna do it? I can show you how Yanagida and I kissed."
Osomatsu's heart was beating very fast, and Ichimatsu's face was very close to his. Luckily, Ichimatsu was pushy and rude; he spared Osomatsu the burden of opening himself up to some kind of verbal vulnerability by saying yes, by closing the gap and kissing him anyway.
Being kissed by Ichimatsu to be given a cold was a lot different from being properly kissed. There was no technique to the former, just being put into a headlock and having a slimy, snotty tongue crammed between his lips. Utilitarian, with the single goal of "infection" in mind. Osomatsu wouldn't have called that kissing so much as getting his tonsils licked. Now, Ichimatsu leaned up on his knees from the floor, took Osomatsu's face between his hands, and brought their lips together. He kept his mouth shut when he did it, and the kiss was mostly dry. It was just a little bit of pressure, chapped lips pressed against his; Osomatsu puckered his lips out a bit because he felt like he was supposed to be doing something. Osomatsu's eyes were wide open and staring at Ichimatsu's lowered eyelashes.
One of Ichimatsu's hands moved to squish Osomatsu's cheeks firmly, making his lips pout out like a fish, and they separated. Ichimatsu gave Osomatsu's head a little shake like this. "The participation is appreciated, but what are you doing."
"I don't know! You're clearly the only one who's ever done this!" Osomatsu said defensively, a little frazzled. Ichimatsu's cat ears and tail had gone away, so he felt a lot more at ease and less like prey, but he still felt extremely out of his depth. "The rest of us didn't go around macking on other guys in lieu of kissing gi—"
Ichimatsu swooped in and kissed him again, catching Osomatsu's mouth when it was open. The inside of Ichimatsu's lip was slick and warm, and Osomatsu briefly felt sharp teeth on his bottom lip before Ichimatsu's hot tongue slid inside his mouth. The sensation of it, invasive and visceral, made Osomatsu's stomach lurch like he'd missed a step on the stairs. It tingled in his navel and he was instantly, mortifyingly hard with Ichimatsu's weight pressing in between his legs. His pulse throbbed in his dick.
Ichimatsu's tongue tapped Osomatsu's bottom teeth and then traced the roof of his mouth. Osomatsu shivered and tilted his head without thinking about it, giving Ichimatsu more room to explore, and immediately Ichimatsu surged closer, the pressure of his lips against Osomatsu's forcing his mouth open further. Their lips moved together wetly and Ichimatsu's tongue slid against Osomatsu's; he bore down on him, pressing him deeper into the couch, forcing Osomatsu's legs into an even more graceless sprawl than Osomatsu's initially lazy posture had placed them. He felt wide open and exposed. Ichimatsu's heartbeat raced heavily—Osomatsu could feel it in his crotch, his hips twitching up into it. Ichimatsu's fingers slid into his hair, and a breathy sound puffed from Osomatsu's chest into Ichimatsu's mouth.
When they broke away to breathe, Osomatsu thought for a split second he'd get a chance to regroup, but Ichimatsu's panting lips traced a damp trail down Osomatsu's jaw and to his neck. The first press of teeth made Osomatsu gasp, "Fuck, Ichimatsu."
Ichimatsu grinned against the thin, terribly sensitive skin of Osomatsu's throat. He pulled Osomatsu's hair a little, and Osomatsu let his neck arch. "Do you like that, nii-san?"
A strange, crazed little laugh bubbled up from Osomatsu's chest, and he gusted out, "What the fuck, Ichimacchan—agh—"
Ichimatsu bit him harder and sucked at the spot, and when Osomatsu's pelvis pushed up thoughtlessly to grind his erection into Ichimatsu's stomach, one of Ichimatsu's hands came down to grasp Osomatsu's hip.
"Yeah?" Ichimatsu sounded so fucking cocky, smirking into Osomatsu's bitten-up neck like the oversized housecat he truly was, like he had a bug caught under his paw and he was so god damn proud of himself. Baby brothers always got a little too big for their britches whenever they got good at something, and Osomatsu could usually ignore or allow it, but not when it came to this! What the fuck kind of kissing with Yanagida had Ichimatsu gotten up to back in high school?!
Osomatsu grasped Ichimatsu by the hair on the back of his head and dislodged his terrible mouth from his neck, breathing heavily. Ichimatsu made a petulant whining noise that Osomatsu's dick really liked, and he glared at Osomatsu with eyes even more hooded than usual. His lips were dark and kiss-swollen, and Osomatsu didn't want to think about what he must have looked like.
"What?" Ichimatsu demanded with breathless irritation.
"Don't 'what' me!" Osomatsu said. "What the hell kind of kissing experience do you have, you dirty little bastard?"
"You don't like it?" Ichimatsu said with an evil, shitty grin slowly stretching across his face. He strained against Osomatsu's hold on his hair, and when Osomatsu didn't loosen it, Ichimatsu slid his hands roughly up Osomatsu's thighs. Osomatsu's dick twitched, clear as day in Ichimatsu's borrowed sweatpants that didn't leave anything to the imagination. Ichimatsu's thumbs pressed in where Osomatsu's thighs met his groin. Osomatsu's breath hitched on a groan. "Definitely seems like you like it."
"Is this what you did with Yanagida?" Osomatsu asked. "You didn't tell me you'd kissed him. You didn't tell any of us. Are you really a virgin?"
"Yes."
Osomatsu squinted at him distrustfully. "Are you lying? Hand and mouth stuff counts, bitch!"
"Hand stuff doesn't count, but either way, I never touched or sucked Yanagida's dick," Ichimatsu insisted. "And he's the only person I've ever kissed."
"Did he touch or suck yours?"
"No. I probably would have told you guys if I'd gotten that far with anyone, even if it was with a guy," Ichimatsu admitted. He rubbed Osomatsu's thighs again. Osomatsu couldn't tell if he was telling the truth. Ichimatsu's hands traveled up to Osomatsu's hips once more. He leaned in on him, the solid weight of his torso heavy and warm on Osomatsu's still very present boner. He grinned that lazy grin again, surely feeling the shape of Osomatsu's dick against his stomach. "Do you think I kiss so good I must have sucked cock before?"
Osomatsu could say some crude stuff, but hearing Ichimatsu say that made Osomatsu's ears burn. He shot back, "Well, have you? Cocksucker?"
Ichimatsu's cat ears popped out again. His pupils were enormous. His fingertips slipped under Osomatsu's hoodie, cool against the heated skin of Osomatsu's sides. His tail swished excitedly.
"I haven't," said Ichimatsu, his voice rough. His fingers slowly, carefully, crept down to hook into Osomatsu's waistband. "I really want to try, though."
Osomatsu's heart was in his throat. Ichimatsu's face was an incredible, dusky shade of red Osomatsu had never seen on him before, his eyes dark. Osomatsu licked his lips; Ichimatsu's eyes tracked the movement of his tongue, and suddenly he was being kissed again with a lot more urgency. Ichimatsu's hold on his hips was bruising.
"Osomatsu-niisan," Ichimatsu mumbled, uncoolly, against Osomatsu's lips. "I want to suck your cock."
"Yeah?" Osomatsu panted stupidly, trying and failing to keep himself from grinding his dick up against Ichimatsu's stomach between his legs. The pressure was good, the friction was lacking, and Osomatsu could feel this entire situation careening wildly out of control. All he'd been doing a few minutes ago was chainsmoking the day away and resenting being an invalid!
"Do you want it?" Ichimatsu huffed right in the hollow underneath Osomatsu's ear. Osomatsu shuddered, surprised at how sensitive that spot was. "I really want to do it. Will you let me?"
"Yes," Osomatsu breathed, staring wide-eyed and unseeing at the ceiling, lost in the feeling of Ichimatsu leaving hot, nipping little kisses in a trail down his throat that wound the knot in his stomach tighter and tighter. Sharp teeth sunk into the flesh of his throat, making his back arch as he hissed, "Shit, yeah, yes—yes, Ichimatsu, Ichimatsu— " He didn't know what else to say. He didn't know what else to do.
The warmth of Ichimatsu's body was retreating as his brother slid back to settle on his knees instead of pressing up against him. Osomatsu was momentarily self-conscious to have Ichimatsu get level with his hard-on, staring at it, and then all his insecurities were shoved brutally aside when Ichimatsu placed a hand over his clothed erection, rubbing and squeezing it through the thin fabric of his sweatpants. The reality of what was happening struck Osomatsu like a train, and a full-bodied shudder and flush of arousal spread from the crown of his head to the soles of his feet. He was going to burst into flames, his skin hypersensitive everywhere. He could feel his face burning wildly as he watched Ichimatsu touch him, so he brought his arm up to mask half of his face in his elbow.
"Freeballing under the pants I lent you, Osomatsu-niisan?" Ichimatsu taunted from below. "That's nasty."
Osomatsu wanted to fire back with a similarly smartassed comment, maybe something about how nasty could it be if Ichimatsu wanted to get his mouth on it, but all he could articulate was a strangled noise, muffled in his sleeve. The noise made Ichimatsu look up at him. Osomatsu was glad he'd hidden most of his face, because whatever was visible of it Ichimatsu really seemed to like.
"Fuck," Ichimatsu muttered, his cheeks dark as he peered up at him, the color spreading down his neck and disappearing under his hoodie. He gripped the waistband of Osomatsu's pants. "You're hot."
And Osomatsu would lord that over him someday, eventually, when he was no longer embarrassed and could instead embarrass Ichimatsu, but for now all he could do was make an undignified wheezing noise as Ichimatsu punctuated his statement by yanking Osomatsu's pants down. Osomatsu's cock sprang free and slapped lewdly against his stomach, the heavy drip of gathered pre-cum at the tip splattering on contact. Ichimatsu's palm—hot, bare skin—pressed against the length of him, a fingertip sliding through the wetness at his slit.
"Oh fuck," Osomatsu said weakly. Ichimatsu ducked down, his breath warm and tantalizing; his tongue darted out to lap at the tip. Osomatsu's hips lurched uncontrollably, but Ichimatsu wrestled him back down by leaning his elbows on Osomatsu's thighs so his hands would be free to hold Osomatsu's dick steady. His tongue touched him again, surer this time, less of a tentative kitten lick as Ichimatsu slid the broad flat of his tongue slowly over the head of Osomatsu's cock. All the muscles in Osomatsu's stomach clenched. It felt incredible, but he was still unprepared for the sensation of Ichimatsu's descent, the hot, tight wetness of his mouth sliding down his shaft. Osomatsu dropped his arm to dig his fingertips into the couch cushion, his other hand slipping into Ichimatsu's hair. He had to hold on for dear life.
Ichimatsu went slow, his tongue sliding curiously along the underside of Osomatsu's dick. He reached a point about halfway down where Osomatsu felt his throat tense around him, and a hot rush of drool and breath as Ichimatsu worked another centimeter into his mouth before gagging unattractively. His hand squeezed Osomatsu around the base of his dick and slid up wetly through spit as Ichimatsu slowly pulled back up, sucking with purpose and pumping his fist around Osomatsu's cock as he went. A long, drawn-out, full-fledged moan tore its way from deep in Osomatsu's chest at the tight, moving heat of it. It sounded foreign to his own ears—Osomatsu had gotten off in the presence of his brothers before, but he had never let himself make a sound like that, raw and unfiltered for just a single sibling to hear.
He should have expected Ichimatsu to sink his claws into something as vulnerable and honest like that. Ichimatsu's lips were plump and shining with spit as he flicked his tongue against Osomatsu's frenulum. "Do you like that, nii-san?"
It was the second time he'd said that in fifteen minutes, but Osomatsu couldn't call him out on recycling stale dirty talk when it still made a horny flush of humiliation go through him. All he could do was pant, "Uh-huh."
"Good. You sound like a whore." Ichimatsu's eyes were alight with mischief, like he knew he was doing something bad and was delighted to be doing it. It sent a nasty thrill through Osomatsu, who tightened his grip on Ichimatsu's hair.
"You look like one," he told him breathlessly, rallying his confidence to snark back. Sure, he hadn't had any kissing experience like Ichimatsu, but if Ichimatsu was telling the truth then he had no more sexual experience than Osomatsu. He could only be so cocky. He pulled Ichimatsu's hair and watched his eyelids flicker with pleasure, and a scalding breath cascaded over his cock. Ichimatsu's grip tightened and twisted, the practiced swivel of a chronic masturbator, and Osomatsu groaned openly again as Ichimatsu swallowed him down once more.
It was messy and hot and fast after that, the room filling with frankly gross slurping and squelching sounds as Ichimatsu sucked his cock with clumsy enthusiasm, retching occasionally when he got too bold and the head of Osomatsu's cock bumped against the back of his throat. The intimate filthy noise of it all coiled the heat tighter and tighter in Osomatsu's abdomen, the eager way that Ichimatsu pumped with his hand what he couldn't manage with his mouth. Osomatsu glanced down and saw Ichimatsu's other hand working diligently on his own cock, his sweatpants shimmied halfway down his pale thighs. The sight of his brother enjoying this as much as he himself was made Osomatsu grip Ichimatsu's hair harder and thrust up into his mouth, pushing a hard, lurching gag from him.
"Sorry," Osomatsu said, breathless and dazed, when Ichimatsu pulled off.
"No," Ichimatsu said hoarsely, his chin slick and shiny with saliva. It trailed in a quivering thread connecting his lips to the leaking head of Osomatsu's dick. Tears were pearling in the corners of Ichimatsu's hazy eyes. "'S good. Fuck. Tell me when you're about to cum."
Osomatsu slid the thumb of his free hand over Ichimatsu's bottom lip, entranced by how swollen and fucked it looked. He swiped his hand over the drool on his brother's chin and took himself in hand, pumping swiftly. The pressure was building uncontrollably.
"I'm gonna cum. You look so fucking sexy like this," he panted unselfconsciously, bumping the tip against Ichimatsu's mouth and sliding it around like he was applying lip balm. Ichimatsu stuck his tongue out and groaned when Osomatsu pushed his cock halfway in and then retreated. "You look like such a slut, Ichimacchan."
"Nii-san," Ichimatsu panted.
"Call me nii-chan." It felt good to make demands like this.
"Pervert," Ichimatsu said with no small amount of amusement in his voice, but there was an undercurrent of affection that he could never hide from Osomatsu. Osomatsu, loving him unstoppably, pulled him closer by the hair.
"Say it." Please.
"Ah, fuck," Ichimatsu grunted, sliding his cheek messily against him. "Nii-chan…"
Osomatsu came, thick ropes spurting out in hot pulses over Ichimatsu's lips and cheek. Ichimatsu shut his eyes and let his mouth fall open, taking the mess with an unabashed look of debauched ecstasy. His tongue darted out to collect the drippings directly over his mouth.
"Fuck," Osomatsu breathed, taking in the sight of him like a work of art.
Ichimatsu breathed hard, his eyelids fluttering, and he grinned up at Osomatsu from between his thighs. His teeth were sharp. He sounded sleepy and pleased with himself as he said, "How was that?"
"You're a monster," Osomatsu said, releasing Ichimatsu's hair to cradle his messy face in his hands. "It was so good. What about you?"
Ichimatsu lifted his hand, showing the strings of cum dripping between his fingers. "Whoever said cock is an acquired taste is full of shit."
Osomatsu burst out laughing and reached down to haul Ichimatsu up by his hoodie. He kissed him sloppily on the mouth, lips and tongue sliding through the bitter, salty mess he'd made there. Ichimatsu wrapped his arms around him and kissed him back eagerly, purring so hard it made both their chests vibrate. He got jizz all in Osomatsu's hair as he touched him, but Osomatsu didn't care. They were going to have a huge mess to clean up one way or another. The stink of sex and drool, at least, had overpowered the smell of cigarettes, and he was sure their siblings would appreciate that.