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They had history that preceded her, and she understands. But Arthur was adamant about his feelings for her. She believes him, yes, but with the slightest ear for any kind of hesitation.
And there was hesitation. Years of wanting and almost constant teasing from Eames make him hesitant to believe that Eames finally wants the long haul. They’re calling each other in what seems like secret, but Ariadne has ears and she doesn’t always fall asleep first.
He whispers and she strains to hear, until one night she hears, “I will hurt her if I walk away. You’re sure?” There isn’t any more than that, and then she’s sure she won’t want to hear anyway.
The next day she asks if she could talk to him. He’s worried, but he knows there are things he needs to talk about as well. He thinks it will end in tears, on both ends. He loves her, he really does. But he’s wanted Eames for years now, and Eames is finally ready for more. He can’t give up this chance—even if it means hurting the one that put him back together.
“You never really loved me, did you?” she asks, but doesn’t look at him. She is staring at the kitchen counter behind him while he has his hands clasped on the table top. She finally notices how out of place he is in her simple apartment and she feels foolish for believing their life was ever enough for him. He must have always been out of place but her love made a home for him anyway.
“Of course I love you, Ariadne. It’s just… this…” he stops. He wants to continue, but she’s shaking her head now, still not looking at him.
“I am so in love with you,” she says, still not looking at him. “And I should have known I couldn’t compare,” she finishes softly.
Arthur is stunned into silence and he’s shaking his head now, willing her to understand that he does love her—but Eames… well Eames may just be the love of his life.
“This is my fault. I should not have…” what? Loved her? Pursued her? Answered Eames’ call? “I should have told you the truth about me and Eames. I am so sorry, Ariadne.”
“Loving you—being in love with you—means I want you to be happy, Arthur.” She is looking at him now. Her eyes don’t have the glaze of tears like Arthur’s and her voice is soft, but not breaking. She is eerily the calm one and the role reversal sends chills down Arthur’s spine. Something about this feels so wrong and he measures it in disgust for having hurt someone as perfect as her.
“You love him. You love him more than you could ever love me, and that hurts, but it would hurt more for you to stay with me knowing there’s someone else out there for you.”
She pushes a plane ticket towards him. He doesn’t even know where her hands have been sitting. She must have had the ticket under the table. He looks down and reads that his ticket is one-way and its destination is Heathrow. She is pushing away from the table before he finishes reading the time and date.
He stands and grabs her wrist, pulling her resisting body to him and he hugs her. Her arms hang loosely at her sides and she is trying to pull her head from being close to his face. He grabs her face softly with both his hands, forcing her to really look.
“This is not your fault and it is not because you aren’t wonderful.” His hands drop and he waits for her to say something. He can’t stand the idea of hurting her. He has already begun to hate himself for putting in her head ideas of her faults.
“In another lifetime, maybe you and I would be together. Too bad we’re here now, huh?” Arthur’s heart breaks thinking these are the last words he thinks she will ever say to him. He wants to tell her he loves her, but he feels that would hurt her more, thinking he can’t love her the way she deserves. It all feels so wrong and he can’t help but cry for the end. This is a moment that he’ll look back and want to change. This moment will haunt him in the shafts of his dreams and the defeated look on her heartbroken face will be there to cry him to sleep.
~
He’s at the airport. He’s at the baggage claims area waiting for his luggage to roll around. He’s repeatedly checking his watch, thinking the time is actually quickening as he stands still. He’s so close to feeling something, but until he can see eyes in front of him and hopefully a smile greeting him, he can't be too sure.
~
It’s been two years since he last saw Ariadne and he thought of her every day. He wondered what she was doing, where she may have been working, and if she has moved on (though the thought of her with anyone else sickens him and he can’t help but distract himself with Eames’ mouth).
Eames pulled back from the kiss and looked at Arthur—really looked. Eames was always observant by nature and profession. He’s had similar thoughts over the last couple of years, wondering after her (this must be pay back for taking him from someone else, to live a life watching him think of her—the irony though, is not lost on Eames, for he knows Ariadne must know the feeling as well).
Eames chuckled dryly, iron laced in his tone. “What’s so funny?” Arthur asked.
If Eames were to tell the truth, he’d have to confess to Arthur that he never believed in soul mates or true love, but was content enough to stay this long because guilt ransacked his dreams as well. Visions of a young woman hardened by heartbreak he’d helped deliver have plagued him, if not for his severe overestimation of his feelings. He stayed because he had to make her pain worth it. He knew truths that Arthur refused to admit—maybe out of pride (fear, rejection, humiliation, desperate love).
Arthur made a mistake.
~
It will not be easy to explain. He spent the entirety of the plane ride trying to rehearse what he would say. “I love you.”
“It took me a while to get here.”
Should he say something corny and coax a smile or a laugh? “Ready for forever?” (Is this supposed to be funny because of whom he’s saying it to or because saying it is merely putting words to something that was always between them?)
His bag is collected and he goes outside to call for a taxi. He is giddy for it has been far too long, and the possibilities of how the day could end—although awkwardness could result—make him anxious.
He returns to their place, thinking it’s only a knock away from returning to a reality he has thought long and hard on in the past. He thinks all the going back and forth will finally be over and he can begin again, but for the last time. He knocks and waits.
She isn’t there anymore and the defeat that settles in his chest makes his heart heavy.
~
“It’s okay, you know. If she’s angry it’s actually a good thing. All they say about the opposite of love not being hate, and all...” Arthur wasn't listening and his back remained turned.
“How did we get here, Will? I love you, I know I do. I wouldn’t have hurt her if I didn’t.” Eames rubbed Arthur’s shoulder and wanted to tell him truths he hid but knew it would either hurt Arthur for having been kept secret or spurn him into the arms of the one he truly loves (but who may reject him).
“I am going to tell you something all right?” Arthur nodded. And the night began with answers and ended with tears.
~
She’s having dinner with colleagues after what he suspects is a big day at work. They all toast her and something of good fortune for her, though it seems bittersweet on her face. Her hands are void of jewelry, and it’s the most hopeful he’s been since he left her sold apartment and began looking for her.
She is leaving alone (he’s thankful) and he plans to catch her outside of the restaurant.
Once he’s caught her, she’s confused but the emotions on her face quickly drop when she realizes it’s him.
“You seem to be lost,” her voice is cold. But really, he was foolish to expect anything else after abandoning her for someone he wanted before her (and didn’t realize he couldn’t want anymore after meeting her—he just didn’t know).
“I’m found now. I’m here, please, Ariadne hear me out.”
Her face softens, but her eyes are guarded. Maybe she knows it as well—that she is his true soul mate and love of his life (because she never hurt him like Eames did, and she loves him more than Eames ever tried). Maybe she'll forgive him for the year she spent wondering what she did wrong. Maybe she'll forgive him for the year she devoted to sleeping in other boys' beds to remind her that it was never her fault and where he didn't want her, Phillip/Martin/Eric/Paul find great interest in her. Maybe, he hopes, she'll forgive him.
~
It takes them a long time to find any kind of trust. She couldn’t trust that he didn’t still dream of a man he already said he’d let go. And he couldn’t trust that she wouldn’t run from him the moment things became difficult.
Eames heard from Cobb years and years later that Arthur finally got Ariadne to marry him. He wanted a big wedding with her mother and father and his father present. But she insisted on signing their marriage license and pre-nuptial agreement at city hall. Eames can tell that her reluctance to his reserved romantic side probably hurts him. But Arthur is only glad that Ariadne finally acknowledges that even through mistakes and false alarms, the past is the past and she is his forever.
