Chapter Text
It was one of those anniversaries Jean was not fond to attend. He and his young family woke up early to prepare the things they needed to bring. With his two children around, it would be hard for him and his wife if they would take unnecessary stuff such as too many toys with them.
“Jean, we need to go,” Mikasa said as she finished packing up things into the bag.
“Yes, the carriage is already waiting outside,” Jean proceeded to take the bag from his wife and led her to the open door.
“Papa!” a little voice called him as he turned around, “Papa! Papa ple..please carry me too!” the child stretched up his small arms to reach up to his tall father.
“Stop it, Kiel! You’re not a baby anymore,” an older boy lowly scolded his younger brother.
Kiel, his second son, followed his brother with frustration on his face. He might throw tantrums, only to be stopped when his mother looked at him sharply.
“Papa, do you need help?” Marc, his firstborn, asked as he put his hand on the bag.
“No, you’re Papa is strong and of course your Mama too,” his handsome father chuckled as he faced his wife, giving her a sincere smile.
“Kids, go to the carriage now. The coachman is waiting there,” his wife instructed the kids while she walked with his husband on her side.
It was a quiet trip from Trost to Shiganshina for the husband and wife, not exchanging any word except if the children were increasingly loud as they played.
“We’re here, Mikasa,” he muttered to her when the carriage stopped at the familiar place.
The children got off the carriage first before Jean and his wife. The handsome husband took his wife’s hand, holding it as they silently reached the graveyard of a familiar young man. His beautiful wife slowly parted her hand from his as she grabbed the flowers they brought to placed it on the graveyard. He watched while he felt the building up of pang in his heart. All those years and all those anniversaries he thought would decrease the pain he suffered every time they visited his former friend’s resting place. It was actually the opposite.
“Mikasa,” he mumbled to get her attention.
“Yes?” his beautiful wife stood up, turned around to face him while fixing up the red scarf encircling her neck. He could see the sadness in her eyes.
“Is it.. fine if I wait for you and the kids at some pubs we passed?” Jean requested, not fully determined if he was asking permission or he was informing her confused wife. It was the first time for him to tell her that he wanted to spend their visit at a pub. Usually, he was with his wife the whole day when they visited the graveyard. It was actually like a picnic day where they spent time together, eating the food they brought during lunchtime and before they went back to the carriage. It was also his duty to watch over their playful children while Mikasa peacefully looking at the gravemark. That was why he was unsure if his wife would allow his request.
Mikasa just nodded noting that she could watch over the children as they were no longer toddlers to be followed everywhere. He and his wife also trusted their firstborn as he was a very responsible child to them and to his younger brother.
He wondered though why his sad wife did not further question him on spending the whole day at the pub. His only guess was she understood the pain he was experiencing at that moment.
“Thank you,” he whispered as he kissed his wife on her forehead.
It was not a long walk to reach the pub he was aiming for. This pub was known to the elites of Paradis offering the finest beverages such as wine to its famous customers, including him. Of course, he was famous for three reasons:
1. Hero of Shiganshina
2. First generation of Yeagerists which Floch led.
3. Peace ambassadors between Paradis and other countries.
All of these didn’t matter to him anymore though. These renowned titles were just nothing, except for the benefits he got being associated with it. Living up to maintain the status he held before was awfully exhausted now that he had his own family. He was already contented and happy with his beautiful wife and children.
Or just had he thought.
The waitress greeted Jean with a beam of a smile, welcoming him inside the pub as she recognized the well-known customer. He refused to enter the pub however, opted to settle on one of the sets of tables placed outside where he could have a beautiful view on the old street of Shiganshina.
After the waitress handed over the menu, he was surprised that the exceptional wine from Marley had been also serving there. Well, it reminded him of Niccolo and the famous Marley wine they served to the highest military ranks. The wine in the menu though was different but he knew this wine was from Marley after the meaningful three years he spent there and how the word was written in Marleyan language.
Jean usually ordered the famous and prized two brands of wine made from Shiganshina and Stohess districts, but this time he requested one brand of wine from this district and the other one from Marley. He first opened the familiar wine. While he slowly took a glass shot of wine, his eyes wandered on the alluring street, recalling how dirty it was when they initially set foot on it to take over the Shiganshina again. He looked back on the battle he and his friends succeeded in, but also resulted in the lost lives of many members of the Survey Corps. He didn’t notice that he was already finished with the first bottle of wine. When he was about to open the second wine, a familiar small figure approached him.
“Hey,” the small figure greeted him. Her smile stayed the same, it was very pleasing and her captivating relaxed eyes always gave an impression of being a calm person. He also noticed she was wearing clothes appropriate for the position she held as an ambassador. It perfectly fitted her small frame. He admitted to himself that she didn’t change that much physically, except that her hair was now tied up just like how their beautiful Queen appeared in the formal events.
“Pieck,” seeing her, completely confused on what she was doing there. He was well aware that she was still one of the ambassadors along with Armin and Renier, thus, he thought they were traveling around the world.
“Hey, why are you here?” he continued with a surprised tone, looking up at her.
“You don’t want me to be here?” she chuckled, waiting for something from the former comrade.
“No, not that! What I mean is that I thought you are on a trip with Armin and Reiner,” he explained as he poured the Marleyan wine into his glass.
Before Pieck responded to him, the handsome former comrade invited her to take the vacant seat across from him.
“You drink right?” Jean expecting the confirmation before he requested another empty glass from the waitress roaming around.
The small woman willingly took the invite to sit and nodded, giving him a go signal to proceed on his request.
“Going back to your first question, I am here because of the military exercises to be organized between Paradis and other countries. You know, for strengthening the relationships. We also have knowledge of advanced military technologies while Paradis has the resources to develop them. I volunteered to be part of these activities to oversee the completion of it,” informing the tall man who was now busy pouring the wine into the empty glass he requested for her.
“Well, I know that there will be military exercises to be conducted next month here in Shiganshina, but no one informed me that you or any ambassador will participate in it,” recalling how it was rolling out for the past weeks to the military heads including him as he was now a military advisor.
The small woman took the glass of wine he offered before she gave details of her assignment. Just like him, she showed surprising expression on the familiar taste of wine.
“Just like what I’ve said, I volunteered. When I learned that these activities will take a year to complete, I decided to participate in it,” she sighed, looking down at the wine she was holding. “For me, it means I’ll have to stay here and take a long rest. I’m actually tired of traveling around the world. I’m not saying that I hate it, it's just that I realized that I’ve been traveling for a decade, never settled on any land we went to,” his former comrade continued with the tiring guise she was trying to hide from him.
“I understand,” Jean being able to read the situation, agreed with her as he took another shot of wine.
“Hmm how about you, why are you here?” she asked looking at him directly, noting that it was early for drinking wine.
“You forgot I guessed,” he uttered with an expectant tone.
“Then tell me. I’m not here to judge you anyway,” the pretty woman sitting across from him claimed. He could see the sincerity in her words. Based on the three years he spent with her and the other ambassadors, he knew no one from them had a gut to judge each other.
“It’s Eren’s death anniversary,” the tall former comrade mumbled. He brought his eyes to the glass of wine he had been tempting to drink. He was not sure why he couldn’t look back at the small girl’s captivating eyes, but he was sure her eyes were observing his every movement.
“Yes, I know that. Well, it was nothing I should celebrate. He was not my friend anyway,” she remarked, still her eyes on the tall man. “What I am asking is why exactly you are here, at this pub, drinking alone? Shouldn’t you be with Mikasa and your children?” she calmly asked, waiting for his elaborated response.
Jean was contemplating between answering her honestly or avoiding the hard questions she threw at him. Although she was one of the people he could trust, it was uncomfortable for the tall soldier to open up what he was experiencing right now.
“Mikasa and the children are at Eren’s grave. I left them there before I went here,” he answered, eyes still on the glass of wine.
“Why?” another question she lowly shot at the former comrade who was now playing the empty glass he was holding.
This time, Jean stopped on what kept him busy, averting his eyes to meet her. There was something in her eyes that he could not point out. He assumed it was between pity and curiosity, but did not dare to answer her immediately to get the result of his guess.
Jean noticed she looked away from him and her pretty eyes roamed at the beautiful view of the old street. There was an awkward silent moment she felt.
“I need to go, Jean. It’s already past 3 PM. Need to attend the last meeting for today,” she said after she finished the last glass of wine the tall soldier offered. Fixing up herself, she heard a low voice from Jean.
“What did you just say?” she inquired.
“I think you’re drunk. I said if it’s ok for you to walk with me until you reach the military base here in Shiganshina,” Jean suggested, adding that it was not far from the pub.
The small woman shook her head confirming that a couple of glasses of wine would not make her sober. As for her former comrade's suggestion, she agreed that it was fine as long as he had time to walk with her because she knew that there were people waiting for the tall soldier.
Jean immediately paid the bill, leaving a large tip for the waitress generously served them.
Walking side by side, the tall shoulder slowly strolled as he knew his long legs would surely be left Pieck behind.
“How’s Annie by the way?” he asked to break the silence between the two.
The last news he got was Annie and Armin were getting married, about five years ago. The wedding took place in their hometown in Marley. This was also the reason why he was not able to attend the ceremony.
The tall soldier thought he would also settle down like what he did but it was the opposite. It was only Annie who stopped being peace ambassadors as she decided to have a fresh start. Armin on the other hand determined to continue his peace advocacy not only for their generation but also for the future generation they greatly hoped.
Jean admired his blonde friend for that.
“Annie and Armin are expecting their first child,” she positively answered him with a noticeable small smile on her face. “Maybe any day of this month Annie will give birth,” the small woman added.
“Wooah, that’s great news!” Jean excitedly said. His friend since they were cadets was now going to be a father like him. Actually, his blonde friend was the second from their batch to have a family. HIm and Mikasa being the first ones. The tall soldier wondered when he could meet the former commander of Survey Corps again. He would definitely give a bit of fatherly advice but he knew Armin very well, most likely he would not need it. Regardless, he wanted to see him again and also hoped together with Annie and their child.
Jean was delighted with the news he received. It was almost he could not believe there was a bright future for them after the events that happened more than a decade ago when titans were roaming around when everyone accepted they would die if they joined the SC, when they discovered the truth about the world, when his friends were dying when there was 80% genocide of world population, and when Eren died.
Again, the pang hit him as his thoughts drifted back to Mikasa. Eren held a special spot in Mikasa’s heart. Although he accepted it, it was really hard for him that after all these years, her wife still mourning for his former friend.
“Are you ok?” the pretty ambassador said. Snapping him back to reality as she stopped in front of him. She was looking up at the expression of the tall soldier as if she knew what he was thinking.
“Yes, of course,” an obvious lie that would not miss out by the woman looking at his eyes directly. Jean quickly pondered it was the second time his former enemy and now he considered as a friend asked him questions he would not directly respond.
Well, as matter of fact, it was the first time he got cornered by these questions. He could not remember exactly when was the last time he received inquiry if he was ok or not, or what he’d been up to, or even why he was doing that. He believed he was great at hiding his true intentions or feeling from everyone, but not the woman he was currently with.
“I don’t know what’s happening with you,” Pieck told him with the tone of challenging his response. “And clearly you are not opening up even though I said I won’t judge you. But if there’s anything you know I can help you with, just tell me,” the pretty former comrade affirmed to him. She then turned around after she let out those words and continued walking.
Jean was not sure how he would respond back when he heard her affirmation, but right now he was glad someone noticed the dreadful feeling he was carrying through this time. He also saw something in her eyes, to add up to what he guessed earlier. It was something about worrying. He didn’t want to conclude anything right now though.
“Thank you, Pieck,” he muttered lowly, unsure if the small woman walking in front of him was able to hear his voice.
It was only a few meters when both of them reached the military base located in that district. The buildings inside the base were newly constructed as he recalled it when they passed it by after visiting the grave of Eren last year.
“Jean,” the woman gazed at him, “thank you for the earlier and for walking with me here.”
Jean did not reply but only nodded to her. He thought that he was the one who should be thankful because of what she offered to him.
Pieck waved her hand as she entered the gate. He ensured she had safely gone on his sight before he turned around.
Walking back to where he left his family, his mind drifting if he would see her again, soon.