Chapter Text
Dahyun always thought that she’s cursed as she’s always unlucky when it comes to relationship, and love in general. Of course, she’s growing up in such a loving surrounding, her families are kind to her, her parents accepted her sexuality after she came out when she’s 17 and she has close friends who always ready to fight for her.
But, she does know that not everyone will have that perfect life. And she knows too well, that hers turns out to be her love life. Yes, she came out to her parents when she’s 17 as during that year, she was so sure she’s in love with her classmate, Myoui Mina. And actually, it was not one-sided until a year later, Mina had to go back to her hometown, Japan.
They did promise to keep in touch and one day they will meet again, they really trying hard to make it work, but, they knew, it won’t work so they ended it nicely. At least, Mina is her good friend now. And Mina always supporting her, giving her advice (although she rarely took that advice).
2 years later, she met Im Nayeon. Dahyun already in her second year of college, and Nayeon, the Im Nayeon, flirting with her. Dahyun wasn’t really a super popular student, but, being the leader of the college’s band did give her some reputation.
But again, Nayeon left Dahyun, after 6 months they were together. Because, as shitty as it sounded, Nayeon was using her for getting the Yoo Jeongyeon’s attention. Was Dahyun broken? Probably. But, was it bad? She can say, she’s moving on pretty quickly. And Nayeon did apologize to her, and yes they became friends which for Dahyun, it wasn’t that bad.
She continued with her life, not really care about her love life, until she’s in her third year of college, that’s when she met her. The biggest heart break.
Her biggest heart break, come in a form of Minatozaki Sana, THE Minatozaki Sana. Everyone love Sana, the college’s sweetheart. Dahyun was head over heels over her after they met for the first time during Nayeon’s weekly party. Dahyun wasn’t really knew Sana during that time but she can say, she falls pretty deep for her. And it wasn’t a joke to say, Sana was everything for Dahyun. Dahyun will definitely ditched everything for Sana.
In the middle of the practice session and Sana called for a cuddle? Yup, Dahyun left.
In the middle of examination and Sana said she’s having a bad day? Dahyun will answer all question quickly and left (yes, she brought her phone during examination just because she wanted to be there for Sana all the time)
And, oh boy, Dahyun’s best friend, her other best friend besides Mina, named Chaeyoung, can tell that Sana was just using her. But, Dahyun was too whipped, she won’t listen. And the relationship wasn’t smooth, they’re always arguing, more like Sana always accusing Dahyun for cheating or Dahyun didn’t love her enough, and Dahyun always find a way to win Sana’s heart back.
The relationship went on for pretty long. Until Dahyun’s last year at the college, where Dahyun caught Sana with someone else. And it affected her really bad.
“I swear to God, Kim Dahyun. It wasn’t your fault. It’s her choice to cheat, and you were such a wonderful girlfriend for her.”
“No, Jihyo. It’s me, I must be lacking somewhere and not enough for her. There must be a reason why she’s bored with me,” wiping her tears, she’s trembling.
“Stop blaming yourself, Dahyun. It’s not, you’re not lacking anywhere. Please,” the girl named Jihyo said, pulling Dahyun into her hug, caressing Dahyun’s back softly to calm her down. Dahyun and Jihyo met after Chaeyoung introduced them. Jihyo was the leader of their theater’s club. And they’re clicking instantly.
Dahyun pulled away from the hug and keep shaking her head. The scene after her eyes keep repeating in her mind. Sana, with her ‘best friend’, Momo, kissing in front of Sana’s apartment.
Dahyun wanted to surprised her, she even bought flowers before she arrived. But, she guessed, the kiss was too good that Sana didn’t even noticed her. So, she ran away, and yes she left the flowers because she dropped it.
And Sana didn’t even look for her.
***
“Let’s break up,”
The spoon that she held, fall to the table. “What?”
“You heard me, Kim. Let’s break up. Let’s end whatever left between us,” Sana said, sounded a bit cold in Dahyun’s ear.
“B—But, why?” It’s a lie to say if Dahyun said she didn’t expect this, but still, it hurt her. So deep, that she can feel her eyes getting teary.
“You know why, right? You saw us that day. I was so late to realized that I’m in love with Momo.”
“B—But, how about me? Don’t you know I’m still in love with you,” Dahyun asked, pleading in a hopeful voice.
“I’m sorry, Dahyun. I can’t. I know that we both know; I was just using you. I’m really sorry but you’re too kind, I’m sorry for hurting you so I hope you will respect my decision. I hope you’ll find someone better, someone who can love you.” Sana said, before leaving Dahyun behind, alone.
Like a pang in her chest, Dahyun can feel like she’s breathless, everything hurt so much. She didn’t care all the weird looks coming from the other customer of the café she’s at. The tears won’t stop running down to her cheeks, she’s sobbing and look like a mess. She felt betrayed, and she felt useless. The anger inside her building up, feeling that it was all her own fault. She hated herself, because she felt like she wasn’t enough, wasn’t enough for Sana to love her back.
5 years later
“Dahyun unnie!” smiling brightly, she turns to look at the girl who’s calling her.
“Yes, Tzuyu. May I help you?” She asks, looking at the girl catching her breath, after running to her.
“Nothing, just want to walk together with you.” The girl named Tzuyu, answer. Dahyun chuckle but still walking together with Tzuyu, heading towards the nearest subway.
Dahyun left, after graduation. Pursuing her dream in a foreign city, far from everyone else. To a city where she felt out of place, but a city that made her moving on from the past. London. Working as an underground composer and a full time photographer for a magazine’s company.
She met Tzuyu here, as Tzuyu is one of the editor from the same company she’s working with. She has a nice circle of friends and still in touch with both Mina and Chaeyoung who announced that they’re just engaged, a month ago.
Dahyun is so happy for them, really. Although she had a past with Mina but that’s all long forgotten. And Jihyo, the one who was with her through ups and downs, was with her during the darkest day. Jihyo had visited her several times in the past five years. And Dahyun is comfortable to be around the older girl.
“Is Jihyo unnie coming this Christmas?” Tzuyu asked, breaking the silence between them. The train isn’t crowded like it always did. Maybe because it’s past 9PM.
“Yes, she is. She mentioned that she wanted to feel the Christmas vibe here. And she has another 14 days of annual leave that she has to use before the end year.” Dahyun answered.
“Oh, for how long is she going to be here?” Tzuyu asked again.
“Well, she didn’t really mentioned exactly how long. But, I think around 10 days. Why?”
“Because, my friend, Shuhua is coming too. And I hope all of us can celebrate Christmas together. Unless, you have another plan with Jihyo unnie,” Tzuyu said, smiling and showing her dimple.
“That will be great! I’m sure Jihyo wouldn’t mind. The more the merrier!” Dahyun grinning.
“Are you sure? I mean, I understand if you and Jihyo want to spend time together, alone.” Tzuyu wiggle her eyebrows, suggesting something that Dahyun can’t catch.
“Eh, why would we spend time together, alone?”
“Don’t pretend that I don’t know about you two, unnie,” Tzuyu said.
“About us? What?”
“Aren’t you two dating?”
“Huh? Dating? No, we’re just friends!”
“Friends? Really? Friends wouldn’t visit you every single year when you are thousands miles apart and video calling you every single night, unnie.”
“Maybe because she witnessed how broken I am back then, and she’s so kind to stick with me, checking up on me.” Dahyun smile, remembering how Jihyo trying so hard to cheer her up, always brought chocolates and ice-cream, and Jihyo even move in to her apartment when she can live more comfortable at her own home.
“Or, maybe, she likes you.” Tzuyu suggested. Which only make Dahyun shake her head.
“She won’t. Love is not on my side, Tzu. No matter how many times I tried, love always left me broken.” Bitterly, she smiled. And the rest of journey left with the silence.
“Where are you?” Dahyun asked, while walking towards the entrance of the airport, currently talk to her phone.
“Just picking up my luggage. Where should I wait for you?”
“Usual spot, I’m already at the airport.”
“Okie dokie. I’ll be waiting.”
She ends the call and rushing to meet Jihyo. She didn’t want to let the older girl waiting. And from far, she can see the girl that, well, she missed the most.
“Jihyo!”
And the older girl smiling brightly, and running towards her, hugging her like she will run away. And for Dahyun, it’s enough to make her feel warm. And she can’t lie, her heart thumping loudly.