Chapter Text
Another day in the Glade was coming to an end. The sun was setting and most of the boys were getting ready to go to sleep. The busy humming of the day's work was fading into a low buzz of quiet voices. Thomas, exhausted from his own day of running, returned to his corner where he had been sleeping for the past few nights, separated from his fellow Gladers. His need to be alone was heavily contrasted by the feeling of utter loneliness that settled over him as he sat down in the grass, brushing a few leaves off his blanket. Half-heartedly, he wrapped himself in the woollen fabric and lay down on the ground that still felt warm from the day's sunshine.
He didn't remember to ever have experienced tenderness; he knew that people who loved each other hugged and kissed just like he knew about the weather or gravity, but he couldn't tell whether he'd had a mum who embraced him every night or a partner who held him while he slept. Still, he found himself missing feeling someone else's warmth at that moment. Suddenly, he found himself pondering how it would feel to be held by Newt.
That thought had occurred to him before; Newt was always friendly and the only one who genuinely seemed to care for him. Thomas had wondered if he was gay, and he had come to the conclusion that he didn't really know - but there was something about Newt that made his heart beat faster.
Thomas closed his eyes and willed himself to sleep, but his thoughts kept going around and around what he had seen today running in the maze. His mind tried to retrace all his steps. There had to be a solution to this riddle, there had to. He knew it. And he felt that they were close to finding it. What was it they were missing?
The boy groaned and turned to face away from the wall, blinking tiredly. He shrieked and sat up abruptly when he saw that someone was sitting there, leaning against the wall next to him, needing two seconds to realise that it was only Newt who was looking up at the now starry sky.
"Only" Newt. As if there could ever be such a thing as "only" Newt for Thomas.
With his heart still beating at a rapid pace, he managed to pant out the words: "What the hell, shank? Wanna give me a heart attack?!"
Newt just shot a quick glance at him before returning his eyes to the night sky. "Naw. Just thought you might need some company. You looked kinda forlorn alone in your corner."
Thomas was astonished at how Newt knew what he was feeling; for a few moments, he pondered whether Newt had telepathic powers, too, which he had kept hidden from him until now. The thought made Thomas blush.
"You're right", Thomas admitted. "Like... Do you think there's somewhere out there missing me this very moment?"
Newt was silent for a moment, then he answered: "I'd like to think that there are people out there missing all of us, yeah."
He was quiet again, and Thomas tried to picture a tall man, looking and sounding exactly like Newt, sitting on an empty bed somewhere, thinking about his missing son. The thought made his heart heavy with grief. He could feel tears stinging in his eyes; tears that had long waited to be shed on the miserable situation he was in. A single drop made its way down his left cheek.
"Hey", he heard Newt say. "Don't get all cry-baby on me, shank!" But he said it in a really nice, affectionate way that made Thomas smile despite everything. Newt reached over to wipe the tear off the other boy's cheek - it was a soft motion, almost tender. Thomas suppressed a sob and asked in a tiny voice: "Would it be weird if I asked you to hug me?"
Newt looked at him and raised one eyebrow. "Hell, yeah. But come here." And he opened his arms in a slightly awkward way to embrace Thomas. The brunette flung his arms around the other boy's neck and held onto him as if for dear life. A sob escaped his throat. "There, there, Tommy", Newt said, patting his back in a way that told Thomas that he wasn't entirely comfortable with the situation, but he soon relaxed and carefully stroked his back as Thomas cried against his shoulder. Thomas was in a total emotional turmoil; feeling lonely and happy at the same time in Newt's arms. It took him a few minutes to calm down, but when he was breathing evenly again, he broke the embrace and looked at Newt, tears still hanging from his eyelashes. "Could you... Stay? I don't think I can sleep alone tonight."
Newt sighed, pretending to be annoyed, but Thomas could see that he was happy that he had asked him to stay. The taller boy lay down and Thomas put his head on his chest, curling up against him after having spread his blanket over both of them. It felt wonderful to rest against Newt's muscular body, feeling his heartbeat, hearing his even breaths. The intimacy of this embrace was more intense than anything Thomas had ever knowingly experienced, and he shivered as Newt's arm shifted to rest on his shoulder, cradling him against his chest. He knew he wouldn't be able to sleep that way, with every fibre of his body being so aware of Newt's embrace. "I...", he started, pulling away, and sat up. The blanket fell off his shoulders. He was suddenly embarrassed and uncomfortable, being so close to the first male crush he (knowingly) ever had.
Newt was looking up at him, blinking tiredly. "What's wrong, Tommy? Should I go?" - "No!", Thomas said too quickly and too loudly. Newt chuckled. "So what then?"
And on an impulse, Thomas bent down to kiss Newt on the lips. The other boy seemed genuinely surprised, but started to kiss him back after several seconds. They settled on the floor, lying next to each other, never breaking their kiss for a moment. It was a tender, sleepy kiss; Thomas traced Newt's face with his fingertips as he discovered his mouth with his tongue, and Newt had his hands in Thomas' hair, gently tracing his lower lip with his tongue. They might have kissed for minutes or hours; when Thomas opened his eyes, the sky was still dark, but Newt was there, and he didn't feel alone anymore. He yawned.
"Time to sleep, Tommy", Newt said gently. He lay down behind Thomas, put the blanket back in place and put another tiny kiss on Thomas' forehead before settling into the grass, spooning the greenbean. Suddenly Thomas was so sleepy, he couldn't keep his eyes open any longer.
"Newt?", he managed to mutter. "Mhm?", "You're the most important person in my life. I think." He could feel Newt chuckle behind him, his breath tickling Thomas' neck. "You should really sleep now, shank, before you get all romantic on me!" But Thomas could hear the smile in Newt's voice, and with a smile on his own lips, he fell asleep.
DON'T read on if you want this to have happened!!!!
Thomas woke up alone the following day. Newt was gone. When he looked across the Glade, straining his neck, he could see said boy, dressed in different clothes, up and about and arguing with Gally. Confused, Thomas sat up, not quite knowing what to think. Had this all just been a dream?