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It was a warm evening, the sky pitch black with a slight breeze flying in circles around the square. The hustle and bustle of the market was no more, the commotion of the Vic punters had died down, apart from the odd drunks scattering all over the place. I mean, it was 10pm so not many people were out and about.
Ben and Callum had decided to go out, to get some fresh night air and get some late, late dinner from the fish and chip shop. Also, to get out of the flat because Ben and Callum hadn’t got any alone time throughout the whole day.
Violet had been finishing off some of her knitting in the living room, Stuart and Rainie were in their room, no doubt stressing over Abi’s disappearance, so Callum had decided to get him and Ben out of the flat for a bit (even if it was just for half an hour to get some food down them).
Callum had put one of his old hoodies over him, made Ben put his black denim jacket on because Ben would’ve no doubt caught a cold! Then, when they were ready, they both trudged down the stairs out of the Cokers flat, opened the flat front door and out of the main funeral parlour.
Ben had moaned the whole way to the chippy, saying how they could be getting it all hot, on the blow up bed by now, but Callum wasn’t having it.
“Ben, we’ll have to wait till everyone’s asleep first, and anyway, I’m hungry,” Callum had huffed, making Ben sigh in the process.
Along the way, Callum had been talking about random things while Ben was daydreaming about Callum’s naked body. Bit out of the blue stuff to daydream about, but Ben couldn’t listen to Callum talk about Matt Hancock and his affair much longer.
“He really screwed it up there!” Callum had laughed, picking up on Ben’s zoned out confusion. “Ben, you listening?” and Ben had replied, “Oh sorry, my implant is being a bit slow today-“.
Ben thought that Callum had picked up on his blatant lie but couldn’t be bothered to argue with him. But it was true, Matty boy had done a right old cock up with the whole affair thing. Minutes later, Ben and Callum walked hand in hand to the fish and chip shop, opening the door together, and jumped right up to the counter.
Callum ordered large fries with fish sticks and some tomato sauce, along with a Coke. Ben had just ordered some water. “Babe, you not hungry?” Callum had questioned. “Nah I’ve not really got an appetite at the moment.”
And they left it at that. Ben holding his water in one hand, Callum’s hand in the other. Callum, on the other hand, was holding a large bag of chips, a Coke and a wad of fish sticks stuffed in some paper wrapping. Callum didn’t think anything of it, Ben was just full, there wasn’t anything to it. Maybe. Maybe not.
When they had sat down of the bench, bang in the middle of the square, Callum could feel Ben’s leg shaking under his hand that was carefully placed on Ben’s thigh. “Ben, are you cold? Do you want my jacket?”
Ben took Callum’s word in and made sure to shut that down real quick. “No, no it’s just the wind, it’s just a bit nippy innit.” Callum glared at him with confusion.
“So you do want my jacket?”.
Ben shook his head, “Honestly, Callum, I ain’t cold, I promise.” Callum was now starting to get worried. For all Callum’s knowledge, Ben wasn’t cold but his leg was shaking, which made no sense whatsoever. Why was his leg bouncing up and down like a yo-yo then?
“Callum. Can I- can I ask you summat?” Callum swallowed one of his chips thickly. What was Ben gonna ask- had he done something wrong? Callum had washed up, with Ben’s help drying, tidied their bed up, put on a clothes wash, so he couldn’t have done anything wrong, right?
“Yeah- yeah of course, what is it?”
Ben was thinking of how to put this without Callum stressing the fuck out. “Do you think I’m fat?” Shit, now he’d said it. Why would he literally blurt it out without even considering what he was saying. Ben hated himself even more now. Insecurities were Ben’s biggest predicament.
Callum’s eyebrows raised, his lips upturning into a firm frown. “What?! No, of course not, why- why would you even think that?” Callum sounded angry, which made Ben even more nervous and on edge.
“Be honest, Cal. I know I’ve been gaining weight, everyone seems to think it.”
Callum cleared his throat earnestly and spoke again, “Ben, you are not fat, you’re fucking sexy, look at ya. You’re like sexy on a stick!” Callum said, receiving a small giggle from Ben. “Is that why you haven’t been eating much lately? Because, if that IS the reason, than that’s ridiculous because you absolutely don’t need to lose weight darlin’.
“Callum I’m not stupid, alrigh-. I’ve been on the scales, and I don’t think scales lie, unless the numbers are fucked and the battery is bust.” Callum smiled softly. Ben’s casual sarcasm was one of the main things that’d drew him in those 2 years ago.
“Ben, scales are stupid. Why should numbers decide how many stone your body should be? Your happy, right? Everyone’s weight is different. There’s people that weigh 50 stone, there’s people that weigh 5 stone. It doesn’t matter what the scales say, I’ll always, always find you sexy. I literally don’t give two craps if you are skinny, fat, thin, large, small, big, short tall, you’re gorgeous and I don’t think I need a piece of metal with numbers on to tell me whether my husband is the love of my life.”
Ben just stared at Callum's gorgeous, beautiful blue eyes, wondering how or why he had got so lucky with Callum. Ben had never really believed that he deserved love; his dad had always put him down; his mum had died (well for a bit anyway); he'd lost Paul- the love of his life; no one really showed him love. Except of course Callum and Lexi, and (obviously) Jay and Lola. Callum was one of the only things that really promoted his happiness more than anything. He couldn’t be complete without Callum.
Ben didn’t really know what he wanted in his life, but he knew that he wanted to live, grow old and die with his, beautiful, Callum.
Callum was just, so happy with Ben. He was content, happy. Callum was married to most gorgeous, sweetest, sexiest man no matter the past, present and future, he just wished Ben could see that. He was waiting for Ben’s response, as Ben hadn’t said anything after Callum had last spoke. They had just been admiring each other’s eyes and face.
Ben knew what he wanted now. He looked down at his lips, he brushed his own hair back from his forehead, he then leant in, his lips touching Callum’s.
Callum felt his soft lips against his own. Ben’s lips were soft, wet and warm, it made Callum smile into the kiss.
Tongues touching, mouths moving, noses brushing, they both breathed against each other, quietly and calmly. This was what made Ben and Callum such a beautiful couple. The casual softness between them. It was just them together- that’s all they needed, no one else.
Oh lights go down, in the moment we’re lost and found. I just want to be by your side, if these wings could fly.