Chapter Text
Marinette hadn’t expected this. That they’d be left in limbo, with no way to move forward. Hawk Moth was gone. It was more than the usual one or two week hiatuses. He was gone indefinitely as far as they knew. He’d left a message to let them know that he would be back but never giving exact timeline. How considerate and rude of him at the same time.
She was tired. The constant back and forth and hoping for it to be over had been going on for too long. She wanted to be free to live a normal life. She wanted to rest. She wanted…
There were a lot of things she couldn't get at short notice, not yet, but she could get one. She had been so prudent for so long, she could be careless for one night. She deserved it.
When she arrived for patrol that evening, she saw that Chat wanted to tell her something. But she didn’t let him talk because her determination was too fragile. She wanted him and she wanted him now. She didn’t want distractions and if they started talking she’d get distracted.
Maybe she should have said something after all, she thought as she felt him stiffen when she flew into his arms and kissed him. He pulled back, not surprisingly looking shocked.
“M’lady, what..?”
She didn’t reply, just kissed him again. This time he responded, but not as enthusiastically as she’d hoped for. Couldn’t he feel the despair in her? Couldn’t he read her mind as he often did?
“Please,” she whispered against his lips, hoping he would see the plea in her eyes.
“Is something wrong?” He asked, using the lull.
“No.” Not yet. It would be if she didn't have him right now. She felt as if she was burning.
“Why won’t you talk to me?”
“I need you, now,” she admitted finally, feeling her whole face warm up. He saw it all, she was certain, in spite of the darkness around them that made it hard to see his face clearly.
“Are you drunk?” His hesitant question made her snort.
“No.” It was no wonder he’d think that. She’d never acted so brazenly around him before. Or ever in her life. She'd never given any indication that she wanted this either.
“But you don’t want to talk about it?”
“Kitty, I want you. I didn’t think that it would be so difficult to convince you to give me this.” She could already feel him retreat, putting too much space between them. “Haven’t you wanted it all this time?” It was a low blow, but she was that desperate.
“This is not fair,” he replied, sounding hurt. “I want you, yes. But I don’t understand why it has to happen like this.” He had the right to demand an explanation, she just didn’t believe she could give it to him.
“If this is a no, I understand. I’ll go lick my wounded dignity.” She turned around, already feeling humiliation take hold. She’d been so stupid to think that it would be easy.
Before she could go, though, she felt a hand grasp her wrist.
“What is the condition - that I don’t talk?” He sounded subdued, as if she’d completely disarmed him. She felt bad for one second before being reminded of the initial need that had pushed her his way. She knew she shouldn’t use her power over him like that but she was beyond caring.
“You can talk, just don’t ask me why,” she conceded, while finding her way back into his arms. When she kissed him, she was no longer the only eager participant. In the way he kissed her, she could feel his own surrender. He was giving in, but it was clear he wouldn’t give her all the power.
It was him who coaxed her lips open and invaded her mouth, making her moan at the touch of his tongue. It was him who turned them around and made her walk backwards until her back hit the wall behind her.
He kissed and kissed her, making her head spin, while his hands roamed down her body and left her quivering. His hands slid to her butt and he made an appreciative sound. Then he hoisted her up in the air and she yelped, her mouth separating from his. She held onto him and when he stepped between her legs instantly wrapped them around his waist.
When he leaned back against the wall and she felt how hard he was, she whimpered. His lips captured hers again, unforgiving and demanding. When he rocked against her, she felt a faint growl against her chest that made her grasp locks of hair between her fingers. It had a heady effect on her to feel him like that, to know how much he wanted her.
With only the suits in the way, he was so close and every movement sent a fresh wave of arousal through her. Their kisses became messy and breathless as their focus shifted to other sensations. This was when she realised that they’d have to think about the practicalities and he seemed to have a similar idea because he paused, his lips leaving the skin of her neck.
“How are we going to do this?” He asked, the huskiness in his voice making her shiver.
“It should be dark enough behind that chimney and we have our picnic blanket,” she replied, trying to catch her breath.
“Detransforming?”
“Yes.”
She felt his grip on her tighten for a second and then he let her step on the ground.
“I assume you come prepared?”
“Oh, right,” she fumbled awkwardly with her yo-yo, pulling out not one but a whole strip of condoms.
“M’lady, I think you’ve overestimated my stamina,” Chat whistled and she giggled, her cheeks flaming up again. For a moment, their eyes met in the light from the yo-yo and it felt strangely intimate.
“Um, nevermind, we won’t need them all,” she hastily tore up three and returned the rest before closing her yo-yo, making darkness return.
“Ready?” He asked, his hand finding hers. Was she ready? This was a good question. Was she ready to go through with her plan? Was she ready to face the consequences? She didn’t want to think about it. So she just made him follow her to the dark nook and pulled out their blanket.
She laid it on the ground and turned to him. It was dark, which was perfect.
“We close our eyes and detransform at the count of three.”
“Ok.”
Marinette could feel the bright light even with her eyes closed and when she opened them, it seemed even darker around them. She reached out, searching blindly for him, until she felt soft fabric under her fingers. She bunched it up, using it to pull him to her.
“Hey,” he whispered and she smiled against his neck, where her face had ended up. She took a deep breath, closing her eyes in pleasure at how absolutely amazing he smelled. Somewhere at the back of her mind, the fragrance registered as strangely familiar, but she didn’t let herself dwell on it. She placed a brief kiss to his warm skin before pulling back to tug his shirt up.
“So impatient,” he chuckled. In fact, some of the earlier burning desire was gone as they were faced with the reality of what was happening. But when both of their shirts were off and their lips met again, it flared up, just in a different way.
They both kneeled down before lying on the blanket.
“I know you’re impatient, but let me do this my way,” Chat whispered between kisses that headed lower and lower. She soon found out that this meant her going crazy as his lips covered every part of her with hot kisses. She didn’t know when the rest of her clothes were removed or when his were gone. She was lost in the mesmerising pattern of kisses that simultaneously made her relax and lit her whole body on fire.
He was so gentle, so attentive, but of course this was no surprise. She loved feeling him skin on skin, her fingertips tracing soft skin over hard muscles and getting buried in his hair as he made her moan with pleasure. The more she lost herself in him, the more certain she felt that this had been the right thing to do.
She wanted him, she needed him so much it was unreal and when she finally felt him inside of her, the whole world ground to a halt. It wasn’t because of pain or even discomfort. He’d been too careful for that. It was the sheer power of how it felt to be one with him.
She should have known, Marinette realised. Of course it would be him she would do this with. She couldn’t imagine trusting anyone else like this. She couldn’t imagine knowing anyone else as well as him. She couldn’t imagine anyone else completing her like that. It felt so perfect, so unlike anything she’d felt before, that tears stung her eyes and a sob fell from her lips.
His head shot up at the sound, no doubt this was the worst possible reaction he had expected.
“M’lady, did I hurt you?” His voice sounded frantic with worry all of a sudden, his weight almost instantly gone from her even as he tried not to move too much before she spoke. Which she couldn’t do. Because to her horror she started crying in earnest.
Her arms locked around him and pulled him back to her, holding him tightly. He relaxed into her, whispering the impossible in her ear. “Shh, it’s ok.”
It wasn’t ok. She knew there was no going back now. She could no longer convince herself that this was a one-time thing, that she just had an urge only he could satisfy. This had only served to show her how special their connection was. It went beyond duty and partnership and even physical desire. It was their hearts that were connected, two halves of a whole. Because she loved him, of course she did. She’d been so stupid to think that she could avoid that. The more she’d resisted, the harder she’d fallen for him without realising it.
It hurt, because there was still no hope for them. Hawk Moth was not defeated and it was not safe for them to reveal themselves and be together.
She couldn’t tell him any of this and it wasn’t fair because she’d already bewildered him enough with her actions. The poor guy probably felt wretched because of her. She just cried as he held her and eventually fell asleep.
When she woke up, she had no idea how much time had passed. It was still dark. Her head was resting on Chat’s chest and she tried to remember when he’d managed to disengage them to get rid of the unused condom, but couldn’t. She’d been too lost in her despair.
The sadness was still there and would consume her if she let it but she didn’t. She’d been woken up by the same thing that had driven her into Chat’s arms in the first place. She felt her pulse between her legs, almost painful, no doubt a result of her subconscious supplying sensations from earlier, reminding her how good she had felt with him. Her body needed him now and she could push aside the weight of the earlier realisation, now that it was no longer that fresh in her mind.
Her hand moved where it was resting on his stomach, heading lower without hesitation.
“M’lady,” came the instant reaction. He didn’t sound sleepy at all. “What are you-agh.”
She smiled as she felt him grow and harden in her hand. It only took a few pumps and he was panting.
“I still can’t ask why?” He asked around a moan.
“Mhm.”
“Why are you doing this to me?” She could feel the pain in his voice but also the unmistakable desire. He wanted this, which was more than obvious anyway.
In response to his question, she lifted her head and searched blindly for his lips. She felt a hand in her hair and for a second expected to be pushed back, but instead he just held her close as she kissed him.
The kisses were hungry and desperate and Marinette rubbed her legs together impatiently. With her other hand, she found a discarded condom and smiled as she sat up and dropped it on him.
“Help me open this,” she said as she threw a leg over his.
“You are unbelievable. Bossy even when horny,” Chat muttered but she could hear the foil rip.
“Stay like that,” he told her as his hand found hers and then he unrolled the condom. It was her turn then and she lifted up to position herself over him.
“Are you sure?” His last-ditch attempt to remind her how their last similar exercise had ended only filled her with determination. She eased on to him and his helpless groan filled her with power just as he filled her.
The feeling was already familiar and her whole body welcomed it. She leaned forward and felt electricity crawl over every point where their bodies met. A short kiss to reassure him that she was fine and she pushed back up, her hips snapping.
This time her moan joined his in the night. It was only then that she realised how perfect this was. She couldn’t imagine doing this with him in a bed, in an anonymous room somewhere. They belonged there, on the rooftop, under the stars, the breeze caressing their naked bodies and the moon and stars the only witnesses to their union.
She moved more confidently and felt desire course through her. She quickly found how to move to ensure the right kind of friction that made her gasp. In no time at all, she felt the familiar tension build low in her belly. She’d never expected it would be so easy but with him pulsing inside of her the sensation was even stronger.
When she felt the pleasure wash over her, she threw her head back, only his hands on her hips steading her. Then, breathing heavily, she leaned against him.
She paused only for a second and then lifted her hips before bringing them down again. Encouraged by his strangled moan, she built up a rhythm and felt his move to meet her halfway.
“Oh God,” he cried out as she felt his whole body lift off the ground and she moaned and clenched around him as he hit deep inside of her. He relaxed with a grunt, his movements faltering and she also slumped against him.
His heart was beating wildly under her hand and she could feel her hair stick to her skin as her lips met the slick skin of his neck. When she managed to catch her breath, she lifted her head and kissed him.
“Can you just get off me because I can’t move?” He asked, a smile in his voice. She chuckled and moved aside. Her thighs were burning from the exertion and even with him no longer inside of her, she could still feel it so vividly. It was unreal.
She felt him move to take off the condom and then lean back, gathering her in his arms.
“Satisfied?” She could feel the tease in his words and smiled.
“Very.”
Even before she could settle down, she heard him yawn and after a soft kiss to her hair, he went out like a light.
She felt tired but her mind was buzzing. Now that she had gotten what she wanted, the insistent worry was back, already doubled. She couldn’t stay. What was more, she doubted she could look Chat in the eyes again without giving away how she felt about him. This was dangerous and she’d been so careless.
If only she could run away and never have to deal with this. She didn’t want to hurt Chat but she would do it, no matter if she stayed or went away. She couldn’t ask him to stay away, he was too insistent for that and would be even more after she’d opened up herself to him like that. So she had to take more drastic actions.
Her hand found his, fingers sliding along his ring. It was so easy. She would take it and her problems would be solved. She would protect him and save herself from explaining everything to him. When Hawk Moth returned she would be without a partner, yes, but she’d deal with this somehow.
She didn’t stop to think how sensible this decision was. She just acted. With the ring in her hand, she jumped up on unsteady legs to find her clothes. It was dark and she couldn’t find everything but at least her purse was there.
She paused, crouching down and listening to be guided by the sound of his breathing. Then she leaned in, her lips finding the corner of his.
“I love you.”
He wasn’t meant to hear this and his deep breathing showed that he was sleeping. But at the thought that she’d never be able to tell him that again, her eyes filled with tears. Before she could reconsider and lie down next to him, she left.