Chapter Text
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
🎸🛋️
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Soobin had been excited about sharing an apartment with Beomgyu. Who wouldn't be? Getting to experience college life with your best friend by your side is a rare gift. Although one might argue that spending so much time with anyone, even if it is your best friend, can lead to conflicts and a rough path in the relationship, that wasn't their case at all. The two of them just fit together like complementary colors.
Their life was harmonic. Soobin encouraged Beomgyu every time he felt insecure about his tests, and the other always reminded him not to stay up too late while studying. They took care of each other, always. And yes, they argued about house chores, but who doesn't? In the end they always came to an agreement and ate ice cream together while watching random and stupid reality shows to ease the tension.
They had been perfectly fine in their little home of two. Three if you count the neighbour's cat that kept on magically creeping in their place through god knows where to steal Beomgyu' stress relief balls and the meat of Soobin's sandwiches. So yes, things were good.
Up until the moment they weren't anymore.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
🎸🛋️
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
– Can you please stop playing with the TV volume?! – Soobin exclaimed, closing the self-care book he had been trying very hard to concentrate on.
Yeonjun simply turned his eyes in his direction, giving him an irritating smirk before slowly lifting the remote again.
He pressed and pressed, changing channels and the volume non-stop.
Soobin groaned, counting down from ten to one, closing his eyes and trying to contain the rising anger inside of him. It was a trick he had read in one of the thousands of self-help books he'd borrowed from the university's library. Their initial purpose was to help him survive the weeks of waiting for a letter or call from the internships he applied to. It didn't work that well regards overcoming his anxiety, but lately it had been quite helpful in controling his daily urge to murder Choi Yeonjun with a kitchen knife.
Said boy was still staring at Soobin when the younger opened his eyes again, teasing written in every line of his expression. Soobin gave him a glare that only made the older smile wider before turning his attention back to the TV in front of him, making himself comfortable on the couch and resuming flipping through the channels and playing with the volume button.
The younger gripped the arm of the couch he was seated in tightly, wishing the innocent material was Yeonjun's neck.
There he was, sprawled on the couch, one arm braced carelessly behind his head, legs spread and grey sweatpants falling dangerously low on his hip. He was always so full of himself, so annoying, so irritating, and so fucking... hot.
Yes, Soobin kind of had a small crush on him. What can he say? He enjoyed his men like he enjoyed his math equations, fucking complicated. Crushing on his best friend's asshole older brother wasn't his highest point in life, he admits that. But could you blame him? Yeonjun just hit every single one of his buttons.
It was weird, he knew it. But he didn't even realize how that happened… it just did. Between arguments and lots of teasing the man somehow managed to get into his nerves and mind. They weren't even that close, mostly of their conversations ended up in fights. To be quite frank, Soobin wanted to see him dead fifty percent of the time.
And on his bed in the other fifty. Naked preferably.
It wasn't a case of simply being attracted to the person you hate. That would be easier actually. Because if he were to be totally honest, Soobin would have to admit that he doesn't actually hate Yeonjun all that much. And that was the worst part of the whole ordeal, he actually liked him - a little bit that's it. What he did hate however, was Yeonjun's fetish for making his life a living hell, not only with the constant teasing and set ups.
Even without all of that, Yeonjun complicated his life just by existing. With his brown foxy eyes that seemed to be always making fun of Soobin, his mocking voice - that when he sang became fucking sinful, his hands when he played the guitar and hell… his perfectly fit body that he loved to flex, walking almost naked around the house on a daily basis. It all seemed like the perfect recipe to make him lust for a guy he shouldn't want at all. Because in addition to apparently despising Soobin, the guy had been living with them for a while now, half a year to be exact.
Soobin didn't get why Beomgyu would want his brother there with them at first. He mainly had complaints regarding the guy when they talked about him. But he did get it now, partially, Yeonjun was nice to Beomgyu. Soobin enjoyed seeing his best friend being happy and relaxed, and Beomgyu seemed to bloom with his older brother around. Besides, the guy needed a place to stay, and they were in need of another roommate to split bills with. They had an extra room, which was supposed to be turned into a gaming space for them, but neither had gotten the internship of their dreams yet or a well paying job.
So Yeonjun did come in hand to help with the money.
And Beomgyu liked having him around.
Soobin liked it too, but just a little though.
That was his best friend's brother, he shouldn't look at him that way.
But well, that's how he ended up where he was. Babysitting Choi Yeonjun while Beomgyu spent the day out having a decent birthday lunch with his girlfriend. His roommate had asked Soobin to keep an eye on his older brother, who had been getting into too much trouble recently, due to his recent break up, rock band problems and whatever other stuff the guy had going on - it was a lot.
Yeonjun was living with them, in the first place, because he vandalized the car of his ex roommate and bassist after they fought really hard over... Well, Soobin didn't know why they fought, Yeonjun was a bit closed off about the topic. The guy had vandalized Yeonjun's motorcycle first, to be fair.
Beomgyu wasn't innocent enough to believe that Yeonjun would simply behave and stay home for the dinner party they had planned for later, so he left Soobin in charge of keeping an eye on the devil. It was sort of funny how his friend simply assumed he would have nothing else to do. Which, he really didn't, but that was beside the point. Having a good reason to keep his eyes on Yeonjun for hours didn't make his situation any better, and being alone at home with him was something that always made Soobin nervous. It didn't happen much, only when the two of them were forced by Beomgyu to get close, and when it did, it made him feel uneasy. Made him remember.
He sighed, annoyed, reopening the book. Maybe, If at the time he met Yeonjun he already knew who he was, none of this would be happening. Maybe, if Soobin knew he was Beomgyu's brother and the most annoying creature on planet earth before he saw him for the first time, he would have been more prepared. But as lucky as he was, Soobin didn't know any of that.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
🎸🛋️
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
When he first saw him, fingers going crazy on his guitar, all sweaty and singing with that raspy voice, he didn't immediately classify him as "Beomgyu's brother." It was more like “the hottest thing I've ever seen, need to bang.”.
It had been exactly two years since he and Beomgyu became friends, they had been accepted in college already. As Yeonjun was still living in the states between that time, he only met him some time after their high school graduation.
Soobin's father met Beomgyu's mother on a trip to Japan, and it was friendship at first sight, just like with their sons. Both were widowed, both were still young, and had a lot in common, including not speaking japanese at the technology event they met at. At the time Yunha, Beomgyu's mother, had been looking for a new apartment in Seoul. Coincidentally, there was one for rent right next to the one in which Soobin and his father had been living. It didn't take long for Yunha to move in next to them, bringing along her youngest son.
Beomgyu and Soobin became friends instantly, best friends, as if they were written in the stars. They liked to call it destiny.
They had basically shared each other's rooms until high school was over. Going over games, books, tv shows, a lot of school gossip and all the lgbtq movies available online. Beomgyu wanted to be supportive after Soobin came out to him, Soobin really appreciated him for it. Even though some of the movies were really bad.
Point is, they got along pretty well. So no wonder, they had been excited to share an apartment for college, experience it all as a unit.
And Soobin had never been that curious about Beomgyu's older brother, especially because, as it seemed, there was a lot of drama surrounding him, judging by the noticeable change in the atmosphere when someone mentioned his name. He had never asked for pictures of him either, only seeing a few of the family all together when they were a lot younger.
So when Taehyun, one of Soobin's few friends, invited him and Beomgyu - they were a package deal - to watch some random band play at a fancy club, he just went along with it. Actually that was a lie, Soobin only went because Taehyun had free tickets and it had been weeks since he had kissed anyone. He was too busy stressing over college and choosing an apartment to think about getting laid. Beomgyu couldn't make it on time, but the night was fun. It got even better when he laid his eyes on the band's vocalist and guitarist. All Soobin could think about was how much he wanted that sinful piece of human being to like men. And to notice him. He regretted not having put more effort on his outfit, but at least he considered himself pretty attractive.
Soobin didn't really go for a subtle approach, that was too much work for a hookup. He openly stared at the red haired man until he felt his gaze, directing his dark foxy eyes towards Soobin's. He didn't feel butterflies or all those things described in cliche romances, but he did feel a pull, could have been that he was thinking with his dick? Yes, definitely. But still, he knew from that moment that he was a lost cause.
Yeonjun's perfect lips had curved into a half smile and his eyes slid up and down Soobin's body while he sang a line about going down something that was definitely not stairs. Green light. Soobin smiled right back at him, and Yeonjun' smile seemed to widen at that. That kept going for a while, and when the band took a break, Soobin made sure to accidentally bump into the red haired man that was making his way to the bar. He looked like he had just walked out from one of Soobin's wet dreams, ripped black shirt and jeans, black boots, messy red hair and leather jacket.
Cliche? Yes. Soobin wondered if he owned a motorcycle, smoked expensive looking cigarettes and liked to break people's hearts. That usually came with the package. Yeonjun laughed when he asked him that, throwing his head back, showing Soobin the long expense of his neck. His first thought was that he would love to bite it. Which he did later inside the club's men's bathroom, again, not the highest point of his life.
They talked before that, of course. Soobin did think Yeonjun looked kind of familiar, and the name did ring a bell but he was too horny to make any cohesive connections besides his lips on the guitarist's. And can he be blamed for not thinking straight while that fine man was sucking him off like that was his job?
Yes, they sucked each other off in the bathroom. A low point? Definitely. Did Soobin regret doing it? No.
He couldn't shake off the smirk on his face for the rest of the night. Yeonjun kept playing, kept singing, but his voice was much raspier than before. Taehyun hadn't stopped working for a second, their tickets were free for a reason - he was covering the event for the club. Beomgyu had sent him a message telling him he was almost there. Soobin considered if he should text his father to inform him he wasn't going home with Beomgyu. His plan was to get acquainted with Yeonjun's motorcycle, and other things.
So when the band finished their act and pop songs started to play, Soobin had waited patiently at the bar for Yeonjun. Taehyun was finally by his side, gossiping about social influencers drama, the subject was entertaining but all Soobin could pay attention to was the menace of a man walking his way, eyes full of dirty promises.
However, a red-faced Beomgyu screaming and grabbing the guy by his shirt right in front of where Soobin and Taehyun were sitting was something that definitely stole his attention.
– What the fucking hell, Yeonjun-hyung? – He screamed. – What the fuck?
– Beomgyu? What are you doing here? – Yeonjun asked, confused and nervous.
– What am I doing here?! What are you doing here? We have been worried sick! Since when are you back in Korea? – Beomgyu kept asking, he seemed angry as hell judging by how his cheeks were reddening. – You completely ghosted us!
Soobin didn't really get what was happening until Taehyun made the connection for him.
– Oh, is that his brother? Yeonjun, isn't it? – He whispered to Soobin, who finally understood.
Fucking hell. Hot as fuck Yeonjun was Beomgyu's brother Yeonjun.
Needless to say, Soobin didn't get acquainted with Yeonjun's motorcycle.
The brothers took their argument outside. Taehyun and Soobin weren't that happy being left curious, but they would live. When they came back, the two seemed a lot calmer.
– Soobin, this is my brother Yeonjun. Hyung, this is my best friend and future roommate, Soobin. – He didn't look as shocked as Soobin did before, Soobin thought he must've covered his discomfort well.
– Actually I k– He started but Soobin interrupted him.
– Nice to meet you, Yeonjun-ssi. – He smiled tightly, extending his hand towards the red haired, who stared at him with narrowed eyes as if he had just grown another head. And before he could open his mouth, Soobin continued. – This is Taehyun! He is also our friend! – The blond sent him a dirty look but got the "help me" signals written all over Soobin's face.
Introductions were made. Soobin tried to hide his disappointment for the rest of the night, but it had been difficult, especially since Yeonjun had, who would've thought, a bunch of admires who kept coming to their table to try and make conversation. Soon, he just left them to join his band mates after promising Beomgyu to come home the next day.
The next day Yeonjun did go home. Soobin heard all the screaming from his living room, exchanging curious looks with his father.
– Poor Yunha and Beomgyu, that boy is so problematic. – Soobin's father had whispered, going back to the kitchen.
That made him even more curious, what was the deal with Choi Yeonjun?
Soobin didn't get to properly talk to him again until he moved into their apartment half a year ago. The suggestive looks were gone for most of the time, and what he got from him were mainly snarky comments, as if that initial interest and attraction had dissipated into aversion. He slowly started to get the deal about the guy. He was indeed insufferable.
Neither of them ever mentioned that night at the club. Soobin got tempted at times, but he remembered all the times Beomgyu warned him not to fall for Yeonjun' sweet talks, and warned his brother not to try any "funny business" with his friend. Well… too late for that, but Beomgyu didn't need to know.
There was also the fact that Yeonjun was very complicated.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
🎸🛋️
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Soobin took a deep breath, trying again to focus on the book in his lap. It had been half a year. He should've overcome the stupid crush already. In a few hours their parents would be there, Taehyun and Huening Kai, a more recent friend of theirs, would come too, Beomgyu would return home with his girlfriend and they would all have a nice dinner to celebrate his best friend's birthday. Sounded great, if you were to ignore Soobin having to sit there super chill all night pretending not to have a stupid boner for his best friend's brother.
He flipped through the book with angry (and fake) concentration. He had to stop thinking about Yeonjun. He wondered if he should have prepared a more thoughtful gift for Beomgyu instead. He just bought him more stress relief balls and cat food. As a joke. Damn, thinking about it, that was kind of stupid. And not a great gift at all.
He grabbed his phone and opened Instagram, scrolling through it until his eyes landed on a video of a cake being decorated. The post accompanied a recipe and everything. Oh. Soobin could bake Beomgyu a cake, that would be a more significant present. Plus, his best friend loved cakes. He had to call Beomgyu's mother to check if she wasn't bringing one though. But what bad could another cake do? The more the merrier.
Soobin's train of thought was interrupted by the sound of the TV being bizarrely turned up. Fucking Yeonjun.
– What the heck is your problem?! – He yelled at Yeonjun, trying to make himself heard despite of the noise.
– You stopped looking at me all thirsty. – He explained, laughing. – I felt needy.
If Soobin had any weapons near him, he would have murdered the asshole.
– Lower it down! - He ordered, feeling the start of a headache.
– What? I can't hear you. – The irritating smirk was back on his lips.
Enough.
Leaving his phone on the little table in front of them, Soobin marched over to the TV, taking the plug out of the outlet. As the device was turned off, Yeonjun sighed, rolling his eyes. Soobin breathed in relief, he had never heard a sound more wonderful than silence.
– What is wrong with you? – Yeonjun asked, looking extremely bored.
– What is wrong with me? – Soobin asked incredulously – You were the one who started it!
– It was a joke! You know what a joke is, right? – He asked, laughing without humor. – Oh wait, sorry. Of course you don't know. I forgot I was talking to Mr. I have a stick up my ass.
For a second Soobin considered throwing the TV on his head.
– I know what a joke is, you jerk. – He replied. – And this isn't it, this is you being a fucking idiot.
– Or maybe you just need to expand your sense of humor! – Yeonjun snapped, crossing his arms, not seeming a bit fazed over Soobin's insult. – You are too tense these days.
– Trying to pierce someone's eardrums is not humor, Yeonjun. And if it is, it's childish as fuck. – Soobin insisted.
– Oh, get over it! – He grunted. – Why do you have to take everything so seriously all the time? If you relax a little, you might even learn to have fun again. Do you remember what that is, Soobin? Fun?
– Just because I have goals and dedicate myself to achieve them does not mean I can't have fun. – He said, in an over defensive tone. The accusation touched on a sensitive subject Soobin didn't want to discuss at all.
– Tell me, without lying, when was the last time you actually had fun? – Yeonjun asked, throwing him a knowing look.
– Well… I have fun reading – Soobin whispered. Yeonjun looked at him open mouthed with disbelief.
– Fun reading self help books? What the fuck, Soobin? That's a whole 'nother level of boring.
– Excuse me? What is fun, Yeonjun? Getting shit-faced and sleeping around? – He asked, pressing two fingers over his forehead in annoyance. – I don't have to do those things just because you think they are fun.
Even though he would love to. But the red haired didn't need to know that.
– Ah, come on. Everyone needs to do some shit once in a while. – He said, still sitting on the couch, uncrossing his arms and staring at Soobin intently as if preparing himself for what he would say next. – Where is that guy who sucked me off at the bar?
For a moment, all Soobin could do was stare at him, mouth shut and eyes open wide.
What the fuck.
– What the fuck did you just say? – Soobin asked, still in shock. Yeonjun couldn't have said what he thought he said, right? They never talked about that, never.
– I asked you, where is that guy who sucked me off at the bar? Who was ready to do it again until my brother got in the way.
Soobin tried the counting ten seconds backwards trick. But surprisingly it wasn't working. He got to five before looking around and grabbing the first thing he saw in his way. When he got back to himself he had already thrown it in Yeonjun's direction.
– Did you just throw a cat toy at me? – The older asked, incredulous.
– It isn't a cat toy, it's Beomgyu's stress relief ball. – Soobin said, cheeks flaming with embarrassment.
– Why did you throw it at me? You are the one who needs it. Here, catch it.
Soobin didn't have the time to process what Yeonjun was doing until the ball hit his face. His breath was quickening, and he got so angry that his vision seemed to darken. Yes, he should have seen it coming, it was Yeonjun after all. But regardless, it made him want to scream.
So Soobin took the mature road and threw the ball right back at Yeonjun's face, stronger this time around. He didn't count on it hitting his eye though and at his own stupid heart melting under the hurt the other showed on his face.
– Ouch, fuck. Fuck, fuck. – Yeonjun was whimpering, hand covering his eye, body curling in pain. Soobin ran to him immediately.
– Yeonjun? I am so sorry, oh my god. I am sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you. Are you ok? – He asked, stomach cold with worry and guilty, his hands going to Yeonjun's arms. – Wait, I will get an ice pack for you. I am so so sorry, hyung. I really am. Let me see your eye.
– I am ok, but that fucking hurt. What the hell, Soobin? – He spoke, not making any efforts to pull Soobin's hands away from his body.
– I am so sorry, seriously hyung. I didn't mean it, I just got... So angry.
– That's ok. I was being annoying, sorry. – Yeonjun said, taking a deep breath and leaning back on the couch.
As they calmed down, Yeonjun could finally manage to keep his eyes open again. Eyes that met Soobin's in that pulling way they always did. Soobin couldn't help but to notice that he still had his hands on Yeonjun's arms and was practically on top of him. He pulled away fast, embarrassed, sitting next to the other on the couch and picking his book again to hide his face.
He heard Yeonjun muffling a small laugh. Annoying.
– Hey, Soobin?
– Hm?
– My eye still hurts, you should kiss it better.
There he was. Soobin rolled his eyes and in an impulse to try and get a reaction from the older, he did just what he had asked. He pulled his book away, turned around and grabbed Yeonjun's face, who looked at him with surprise, eyes widened and mouth agape. Soobin got closer to him, as slowly as he could. He let their noses touch and breaths mingle, and when Yeonjun closed his eyes, leaning in for a kiss, the younger went up and kissed his eye.
– There, all done – He said, pulling away, a small smile of victory on his face.
Yeonjun was staring at him dumbfounded, it didn't last for long but it satisfied Soobin's ego. And it kinda… made his heart jump a little. He didn't know either to be angry at himself for having wasted an opportunity to kiss Yeonjun or for even thinking about kissing him in the first place. Hell, Yeonjun had seemed on board with the possible kiss. What did that even mean?
Was he still attracted to him?
Soobin shook away the thoughts when he remembered all the reasons why he shouldn't kiss Yeonjun.
– So you do know how to pull out a joke, huh? – He grunted, Soobin could hear irritation in his tone.
– You asked for a kiss, I gave you one. – Soobin answered, avoiding looking at him.
– Did you really take offense when I said you don't know how to have fun anymore?
– I know how to have fun, Yeonjun. But I am sacrificing my time to build my future.
– Ok, ok. – He said, his hands raised in surrender. – I wasn't being that serious, you know? I didn't know you were going to take it so personal.
– Please don't start this again. It's ok.
– No, I mean… I didn't know you'd be so offended by it. It's not the first time we've argued.
– Definitely not. – Soobin whispered, rolling his eyes.
– I am trying to apologize, you idiot. I am sorry for calling you a bore.
– You didn't call me- wait. – He narrowed his eyes, watching the smirk that grew on the red haired's lips.
Under other circumstances, Soobin would have been very irritated. He would have returned the offense right away. But he was just tired of arguing, so he just laughed, shaking his head in a negative motion.
– Asshole. I should just kill you in your sleep. – He said in a playful way.
– You wouldn't.– Yeonjun replied, in a light tone. – Who would entertain you? I am fun to be around, you would definitely miss me.
Soobin would miss him, too much. But Yeonjun doesn't need to know that - ever. His ego was at sky level as it was, it didn't need another stroke.
– You're not entertaining, Yeonjun. You are cocky, annoying, childish-
– Hey, stop. – He interrupted Soobin, in a fake embarrassed tone. – You are feeding my degrading kink too much.
– See? That's exactly what I'm talking about. – Soobin said, rubbing his hands against his face. – You always have a witty answer for everything.
– And you don't? – He asked, crossing his arms.
– Well, I'm not the one who starts it.
– And that's so mature of you. - He snapped, a weak humorless laugh escaping his lips.
– This coming from the guy who turned up the TV volume just to piss me off?
– And that's coming from the guy who threw a cat toy at me because he can't take a joke, so... – He didn't give up.
– And here we go! – Soobin exclaimed, frustrated. – Do you get what I'm saying? We never have a normal conversation. You make things so complicated, Yeonjun. And for what? Stop pushing people away, if you keep this up, your funeral will be emptier than our fridge at the end of the month.
– Hmm? I thought at least you would want to go, to make sure I died for real.
– I won't need to. When you die I'll be too busy running away from the police. – Soobin replied, smiling.
– Funny. – He muttered.
– See? I know how to make jokes. I still know how to have fun. – Soobin said, in a victorious tone.
– I hope you are aware that you are the one reliving the subject now. And I maintain my position. You restrain yourself too much nowadays.
– I'm sorry if, unlike you, I intend to graduate, get a job and be someone in life!
Soobin immediately regretted saying the words as they came out of his mouth. The hurt on Yeonjun's face was palpable.
That wasn't fair to him, actually.
It wasn't like Yeonjun didn't want to work or anything. His relationship with his mother wasn't the best after his father had died. And it all went downhill after Yeonjun dropped out of college. It wasn't for the lack of ability. Despite his snarky behavior from time to time, Yeonjun was a good student, he had good grades. Heck, he got a full scholarship in the US. The problem was, he didn't want to graduate in something he wasn't passionate about.
And Yeonjun was someone full of passion, and dreams. He had initially abandoned his dream to make his mother happy, to comfort her in her grief. But Yeonjun couldn't be contained by walls and classrooms. He spent the two years in the US working his ass off as a waiter to save money. He had plans too, he wanted to build his own record label one day. Put out an album, hit the road with his band, playing shows throughout the world. His main passion had always been music, and Soobin couldn't blame him for wanting to get a taste of the rockstar life. He had seen Yeonjun playing before, and still gets to see it sometimes. He always shined, like that was what he was meant to do. His place was on the stage.
So yes, it wasn't exactly fair.
Also, Yeonjun did contribute to their rent. He wasn't living there for free. He had money from the gigs he played. He was struggling recently to find a new bassist and fix his motorcycle but that was beside the point.
Soobin fucked up.
– Sorry… – He said, voice weak.
– No, you aren't. Cut the bullshit. – Yeonjun said, simply getting up from the couch, so fast that it scared Soobin for a second. Oh here we go, the previous look of hurt on the man's face had given space for intense anger. – You think like my mother, don't you? That I am just an irresponsible burn?
– Yeonjun, no…
– Well, you are both wrong! – He continued, ignoring the other. – Just because I don't follow the conventional path, doesn't mean I'm worth less for it! I just want to live a life that's worth living! But of course, you wouldn't understand that.
Soobin understood. He understood better than Yeonjun could've thought.
– I apologize. I don't mean what I said, I spoke without thinking. But don't start offending me again. – He warned seriously, standing up and facing Yeonjun.
– Why? Can't stand hearing truths? You can say whatever you want and I can't stand up for myself? Don't think you can judge me just because you think living outside of the box is some kind of crime! – Yeonjun was standing in front of Soobin, who remained near the sofa, now facing him a little intimidated by the other's anger. – Stop judging the whole world by your standards, Soobin. Some people want to get actual satisfaction in life. – His lips then curved in the cruelest smile Soobin had ever seen, and he should have prepared himself for what came next - Unlike you, who can only get satisfaction in life through your hand.
– Excuse me, what? – He asked. That was sort of true, but excuse him? Rude.
– I'm talking about those nights in the dark of your room. Tell me Soobin, when you touch yourself, what do you think about?
It was like a punch in the stomach.
I think about you, idiot.
Soobin wanted the ground to open up and swallow him whole. The fact that Yeonjun had actually heard him made Soobin want to die. It wasn't like he was discreet enough or silent enough, though, he liked living on the edge sometimes. And Yeonjun's room was right next to his. They shared a wall. What he had said was no lie but Soobin wasn't ashamed of it, really. He had his personal needs, especially counting in the fact that he hadn't gotten laid since forever and his fucking wet dream sleept a door away from him.
There was something extremely erotic about giving in to pleasure knowing that the object of his fantasies was separated from him by a wall only. A part of Soobin always got turned on just by the thought of the guy hearing him. Like in that moment. The surge of desire he felt increased his embarrassment though, making him even more irritated.
– And what about it? Why do you care so much about what I think or do in the dark of my room, huh? – Soobin asked, before he could stop himself. He knew he should've just ignored Yeonjun and went to his room or something, knowing that the other boy wouldn't back down from the argument easily.
But apparently, besides being a horny frustrated mess, he was pretty dumb too.
– It's not like I cared. But you know what, one time I did hear you moaning my name so…
Oh hell no, what the fuck. He heard that?
– Did you hear it? – Soobin asked, feeling mortified. It wasn't completely horrifying to be simply heard, that was kinda hot. But Yeonjun hearing Soobin saying his name? That was embarrassing.
– Do not look at me that way. – He replied, smile fading in front of Soobin's terrified gaze. He averted his eyes, staring at the ground, posture shifting in embarrassment. When he spoke again, his tone betrayed his nervousness. – You insist on being freaking loud. I couldn't sleep well for weeks when I first moved in. Did you do that on purpose? To annoy me?
– Couldn't sleep well, huh? – Soobin asked crossing his arms with a smirk on his lips, feeling stupid for having concentrated on that specific part as soon as he said it.
– Try sleeping with someone performing an audio porn on the wall next to yours! – He exclaimed, brows frowned. – And then moaning your name on top of it all!
– Well, maybe I was dreaming.
– That doesn't sound better, Soobin. At all.
Yes, it didn't. Soobin was tired and angry, besides, the talk was making him kinda horny. And he didn't think very well while horny.
– Well I think you are hot.
Scratch that, he didn't think at all while horny.
– What... What did you say? – Yeonjun asked with a weak voice and dumbfounded expression.
– I said, I think you are hot.
– What? – He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. – Don't you like, hate me by now?
What?
– Hate you? Hell no. Do I think you are annoying? Yes. – Soobin said, rolling his eyes impatiently. – But that's totally your fault. Are you still hot and fuckable? Sadly, yes.
They remained still for a few seconds, facing each other with way too intense stares. Soobin could barely breathe as Yeonjun gasped like a fish in search of words.
He was suppressing the urge to laugh at him. And to kiss him.
– I think you are hot too. – He admitted, voice a lot calmer. – And also… Fuckable?
– Oh? – Soobin mentally face palmed himself for getting stuck and losing his ability to form sentences. Fuck that was awkward. – Thank you?
Yeonjun stared at him with narrowed eyes, he looked personally offended by Soobin's words. But took a step closer to him anyway. Soobin held his stare, gulping nervously at the proximity.
– You are welcome. – He whispered, breath hitting Soobin's chin as he took another step forward, looking up at him. – You know… I could help you get some relief if you want, I wouldn't mind having you moaning my name again.
Well that escalated quickly.
Soobin thought his legs were going to give out at any minute, but by some miracle, he managed to keep his body upright. Yeonjun's explicit words made him even hornier than before, and therefore stupider.
– I wouldn't mind that either.
– Fuck, Soobin. – He said in a whisper, getting even closer, hands going to Soobin's waist. – You know that I'm going to kiss you, right?
– Yeah… I know. – He replied, staring back at Yeonjun's eyes.
– Aren't you going to tell me to stay away? – He asked, in a tone of almost pleading. – Remind me that this is wrong and we shouldn't do it?
Well, if Yeonjun somehow thought Soobin could be strong for both of them, he was way too innocent. Soobin didn't have any sort of self-control while horny.
– No. – He replied, hands finding their way to Yeonjun' shoulders.
Yeonjun was still looking at him in that same intense and pulling way that made Soobin's heart race. So he really couldn't be blamed for tilting his head and brushing their lips together slowly and teasing. Yeonjun closed his eyes, breath quickening and his hold on Soobin's waist tightening. He then slowly slid his lips to the corner of Soobin's, pulling away before the younger could turn his face and kiss him for real.
Soobin growled in frustration. Yeonjun chuckled softly before kissing the other corner of his lips. He briefly descended to Soobin's chin before rising again. The younger could feel his breath on his face, less than an inch away.
A second later there was no distance. Soobin wouldn't wait more than that. He was horny.
He captured the red haired's lips in a slow, sensual kiss. Sucking on his bottom lip gently, and softly dragging his teeth over it. Soobin's hands found their way to Yeonjun's red hair and pulled at it, hard. Dragging the older's head to the side so he could kiss and suck the skin of his neck, especially the fucking mole Yeonjun had there, under his ears, that bothered him daily.
It didn't take much long for Yeonjun to snap into it. Throwing his lips against Soobin's with eagerness. And it was like sparks were fucking flying around Soobin making his entire body tingle. Yeonjun's hands wasted no time before grabbing harder at the younger's waist, pulling Soobin closer against his body. Chest to chest and clothed half hard-ons rubbing together. Soobin muffled a gasp, hands gripping harder at the red hair in response.
After they separated to catch their breath, Soobin's lungs were burning, just like his insides. They rested their forehead against each other, breathing heavily, and Soobin couldn't contain his mouth.
– What are we doing here? What is this?
– We are being stupid, I guess...
That kinda stung, but Soobin understood the feeling. They were being stupid, so of course he made it worse.
Soobin couldn't really tell why he thought it would be a good idea to take Yeonjun' shirt off. He just did it without thinking, muttering curses under his breath as he stared at the well toned chest and abs. Fuck. He also thought it was a great idea to kiss down the new exposed extension of skin. He heard Yeonjun grunt and felt the older guy's hand grabbing at his hair. Pushing it down until Soobin was kneeled on the floor, nipping at Yeonjun's hip bone and palming his erection through the sweatpants.
The moans coming out of Yeonjun's mouth were sinful.
– Fuck. Wanna suck me off? – He asked, hardening the grip on Soobin's hair.
Soobin nodded, pushing the waistband of Yeonjun's sweatpants down. Great, he wasn't wearing any underwear. That made swallowing his length, without thinking about it, much easier.
And so stupid.
Yeonjun pushed his hips forward, grabbing Soobin's thick black hair as he started to thrust in the younger's mouth. Cock pulsing thickly on Soobin’s tongue. The brunette hands curled at Yeonjun’s upper thighs, mouth stretched obscenely wide and red around him.
Soobin's cock was pulsing inside his pants. He barely had time to kiss or fuck anyone since college began, all of this felt like a fever dream. Yeonjun's groans and irregular breathing drove him insane, he wouldn't be surprised if he came on his pants.
– Can I cum on your face? – Yeonjun asked, looking down at Soobin with arousal written in his eyes, there were a few drops of sweat sliding through his face.
Soobin let the red haired cock slip out of his mouth with a pop, letting his hand fist on the length so he could answer Yeonjun.
– Yeah… you close?
Yeonjun nodded, closing his eyes and frowning when Soobin resumed blowing him. The younger felt like exploding, he was pretty sure he heard Yeonjun mutter something about him being "such a pretty slut" under his breath. Which, what the hell? He would question it, but that somehow made him even hornier in the moment. So he decided to put even more effort on the task of bringing the older to orgasm instead.
Soobin put one of his hands down his pants to try and get some relief for himself. However, Yeonjun’s pace was too fast and hard to give him room to concentrate on himself. Soon, Yeonjun pulled at the black hair, tilting Soobin's head back and taking his cock off his mouth, already gripping himself with his hand and pumping.
– Fuck, Soobin – He said roughly, stroking his cock faster. – You look so good on your knees. Put your tongue out.
Soobin's cock jerked hard on his hand. He was dizzy with arousal. He pulled his tongue out and waited for it.
Yeonjun came with a low grunt followed by a gasp that was warning enough. Soobin closed his eyes and almost came on his own hand as Yeonjun shot load after load on his face, eyes wide open as he watched the white warm jets painting Soobin's face. Some of it got in his mouth which he swallowed and then, stretched his tongue licking his lips and chin, everywhere he was able to get to, not caring that he probably looked like a cat.
What was left was on his cheek, nose, eyelashes and eyebrows. Soobin was pretty sure he looked obscene like that, and judging by Yeonjun's fucked out look, he agreed. The older shook and moaned again as he milked the last of his load out, hand gradually slowing down, before tugging tightly one more time to get the last bit all over Soobin's lips.
The younger took it like a prize, licking up until the last drop of cum from Yeonjun’s slit was gone.
– You love cock, don't you? – Yeonjun looked like the devil himself as he smirked admiring Soobin's ruined face.
Soobin didn't answer him. Because next thing he knew, Yeonjun was dropping to his knees and devouring his mouth. His hand went immediately to the younger's dick and stroked it with tight pumps. Soobin couldn't fight the grunts that reverberated in his throat with Yeonjun's moves. He didn't think twice before grabbing Yeonjun by the hair and pushing his head down, encouraging him to put his lips exactly where Soobin wanted them at.
He wouldn't last long, he knew it already.
And fuck, the image alone was an ultimate wet dream. Yeonjun's dark eyes staring up at him through his eyelashes, pupils blown wide as his tongue dragged over the sensitive head of Soobin's cock and finally pulled him into that glorious wet heat. His body was on fire, abdomen contracting as his heart pounded like a drum.
His thoughts started to blur in a confused mass of desire and despair. But thankfully, the pleasure overtook it.
Soobin was doomed, he whimpered and half kicked the air when Yeonjun bobbed his head faster, deep throating him easily. He tugged at the red hair in warning and gasped when Yeonjun pulled back, hand wrapping around Soobin’s cock, fisting and twisting until the younger was nearly doubling over, cumming in thick warm loads over Yeonjun's hand and face, streaking across his chin and cheeks.
– Fuck. – He muttered, letting himself lay down on the floor. – Why are you so fucking good with your mouth?
He didn't have the time to calm down before Yeonjun laid on top of him, kissing him hard and needy.
What the fuck just happened?
As the kiss slowed down and Soobin's head started to think again, without the horny factor clouding his judgement, it sinked in. Oh no, he was dumb. What the hell did he just do? He wanted to slap himself a hundred times.
– That was nice. – Yeonjun whispered, pulling away to stare at Soobin with a softer but still enticing gaze. – What do you want to do now? – He asked, in a soft tone, hand caressing Soobin's hip under his shirt.
Ok, that was Soobin's cue. Time to run away, tell Choi Yeonjun that they weren't ever repeating that again. And maybe coming up with some lie to spend three months away from the apartment, because there is no way Soobin could go back to normal remembering what they did there, in the living room. Or he could kiss him, and do it again and again.
Apparently when it came to Yeonjun, Soobin didn't need to be horny to be stupid.
And yes, he would've kissed Yeonjun. But as he looked briefly to his side, Soobin caught a picture of him and Beomgyu, on their graduation day, with his eyes. What the fuck did he just do? That fear, a feeling that always kept Soobin grounded from doing things he wanted, took over. If he kept it going, there is no way this would end up in a good way.
If he kissed Yeonjun, took him to his room and had his way with him, things would change in so many ways. Who is he kidding? Things had already changed, but as of there, they could still go back and pretend none of it happened. Just like before. Right?
His eyes found the small table next to them and landed on his phone.
– What are we going to do now, Soobin? – Yeonjun asked again, voice lower and deeper.
Beomgyu deserved a better friend.
Soobin looked back towards Yeonjun, trying to hide the nervousness as he spoke.
– Wanna help me bake a cake for Beomgyu?
He was so fucking dumb.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀