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When Technoblade woke up, he was in a suit, alone, in a palace courtyard in a rather large forest.
Said palace was huge, with turrets that spiraled into the darkening sky made of white marble, gleaming in the setting sun. Terraces were lined with plants of every kind, blooming prettily as shadows crept along the land, and despite the encroaching night, the palace was lively, lights gleaming, people (small from where he was standing) lined up on the streets, stretching long and bundled up. There were easily thousands.
Technoblade didn’t know why he was here, but he was dressed for the palace. So he brushed himself off and began the trek through the woods.
Distantly, as he walked, he found that he couldn’t remember what happened before he arrived. Couldn’t remember anything. He had his name, sure, and he was sure that he had a language, if he so desired to speak it, but otherwise, nothing.
He was lost in his own thoughts, slowly making his way to the palace, when she appeared in a flash of darkness almost like a murder of crows. It was a woman, regal and kind looking, wearing a cloak that dripped off her like ink, fluttering like feathers in the wind. Atop her head was a wide brimmed hat, decorated with preserved roses, a dusky red to decorate the mostly black clothes. She smiled, approaching him.
“Hello Technoblade,” she said pleasantly, and he bowed as politely as he could manage.
“Hello.”
“Do you know who I am?” she asked, and he shook his head.
“I’m afraid not, I apologize.”
“Don’t worry, you’re not supposed to. All you need to know is that I’m going to be your guide,” she said, offering an elbow to him, which he took without thinking. She patted his arm gently. Her hands were cold.
“Why are you my guide?” he asked as she started leading him, her dark cloak billowing behind her like a set of wings.
“Why am I specifically your guide, or why am I a guide in general?” she asked, turning slightly to look at him, a gentle smile on her face.
“The second one,” he paused for a moment. “And the first one I suppose.” She chuckled.
“For the second one, I am a guide because the journey is easier when you have someone to talk to, correct? As for why I am your guide, well, it’s because I have been keeping track of you for a very long time, Technoblade,” she said, holding his arm imperceptibly tighter as their path switched to brick.
“Why? Why me? What is different about me?” he asked quickly, and she reached for her hat, gently holding it on her head as the pathway sloped upwards.
“You have a very special soul, Techno. There are quite a few things that set you apart from the others.”
“Is there something wrong with me?” he asked. She shook her head a little.
“Not quite. In fact, someone could look at it as a very good thing about you.”
“What could possibly be good about me?”
“Technoblade, your soul is special because it holds onto little pieces of other people’s souls,” she explained. Techno stared at her incredulously.
“Who are you?” Techno asked, and she winked at him.
“I am Death, Techno.”
He stopped walking, turning to her, and she followed suit.
“I didn’t-“
“Didn’t what?” she asked invitingly.
“I didn’t think Death would sound so kind.”
“It is in my nature. I care for everyone who appears in my forests. They are all my children,” she explained.
Techno slowly turned to the palace ahead of him.
“What is in there?” he asked quietly, and Death tilted her head slightly.
“All the people you have harmed in your lifetime,” she said. He swallowed roughly, eyes flicking from the palace to her.
“That’s a lot of people.”
“I know,” she said calmly, reaching into her pocket, pulling out a smooth green stone and gently attaching it to his ear. Her hands were of ice, but the stone was warm, like it had been sitting in the sun.
“They hate me.”
“I know,” her tone was placating, soothing his worries as she pulled a boar skull from seemingly nowhere, slipping it over his eyes and nose until most, if not all, his features were concealed.
“They’ll kill me,” Technoblade said lastly, and she put a hand on his shoulder, brushing off the fabric of his suit with her fingertips.
“Techno, darling, you’re already dead.”
With that, Death turned on her heel, slipping away from him into the crowd, her cloak dancing away from his fingertips as he tried to follow her.
The crowd was hard to move through, parting for his guide but not for him. He saw her hat disappear into a hallway and froze, stopping his search, turning to the people surrounding him.
It was only then that he realized that he had found his way into the ballroom. The guests staring, eyes wide and watchful, studying what he was doing as he began panicking in the middle of the room.
“Technoblade?” a comforting voice said, and Technoblade turned sharply, eyes locking in on a young man he didn’t recognize. “Take a deep breath, for me? The music will start soon.”
Techno inhaled sharply, and the crowd loosened, eyes drifting away, an open circle being formed around him as he slowly calmed.
The space revealed an orchestra at the front of the room, poised and ready to begin. The conductor locked eyes with Technoblade for a moment before he nodded slightly and raised his baton, leading the orchestra into the beginning of something like a waltz.
The man stepped forward, taking Technoblade’s hand and gently placing it on his waist, taking the other in his hand. Slowly they began to waltz in time with the music, the man leading for a bit until Techno took his first confident step.
Then he began to speak.
“You know why we’re here, right?” he asked, and Techno nodded a little.
“Sort of. I hurt you.”
“It’s more than that. This is your time to make amends, smooth out the pain,” he said.
“Am I supposed to know everyone here?” he asked, concern slipping into his voice. The man chuckled a little.
“No, nobody expects you to. We just want you to listen with an open mind and open heart.”
“So… who are you?” he asked, and the man smiled.
“I am the first person you ever hurt, I have long since made peace with this,” he started, smiling as Techno led him into a twirl.
“What is your name?” he asked.
“Call me Nornaro,” he said, tilting his head to the side a little.
“Nornaro. How did I hurt you?” he asked.
“You killed me, of course,” he said bluntly, and Techno blinked, swallowing roughly. “You killed my family. All of us. It was an accident, your first experience with bloodlust,” Nornaro explained as they continued to dance, Techno stiffening as he spoke.
“I killed you all?” he managed to choke out, and Nornaro nodded, a faint smile on his face.
“Yes. You did, and it wasn’t okay, nor will it ever be, but we forgive you,” Nornaro said, and they slowed to a standstill in the center of the ballroom. His grip on Techno’s shoulder tightened as they rocked back and forth.
“Who was I to you?” he asked, and Nornaro smiled sadly.
“Don’t worry about that.”
“I want to know.”
“You don’t, Techno,” he said, and Techno shook his head roughly.
“I want to.”
“I was something of a best friend. We were going to start up a weapons shop together. We were planning on opening it in a week when you killed up. You came over to my home to prepare with me, and something overcame you. We were all dead within a few minutes,” he said, eyes sharper than they had been a few moments ago.
“I- Nornaro-“ Techno started, and he tilted his head.
“Don’t apologize. We know it wasn’t your fault. You regretted it afterwards, that we knew,” he explained, and Techno nodded.
“Thank you.”
“You’re quite welcome, Techno,” he said, before he slowly began to detach himself from Technoblade, who gripped onto his hand tightly.
“Where are you going?” Techno asked frantically, and Nornaro smiled.
“Your time with me is done. It’s time to dance with the other guests,” he explained. The crowd swarmed in, and Techno quickly lost Nornaro, a young girl who barely reached his hips took his place, looking up at him brightly, smiling.
“Hello Mr. Blade!” her two front teeth were missing as she offered up her hands. He took her small (so small, she couldn’t have been this small when he killed her right?) hands in his, and she stepped onto his feet.
“Who are you?” he asked as the music started up again, the little girl dancing on his feet as he stepped back and forth.
“Erisna. You killed my mommy,” she said and Techno’s eyes widened. She rolled her eyes.
“You didn’t think that everyone here is someone you killed directly, did you? You’ve hurt all of us in many different ways. Did you forget that the people you killed had families and lives of their own?” Erisna asked, and Technoblade slowly shook his head.
“I didn’t think about that,” he whispered, and she tilted her head slightly.
“We didn’t think you would,” she said sadly, before she smiled again. “But now you will, yeah?”
He nodded and she peered up at him for a moment before suddenly the weight increased on his feet, she grew taller in an instant. He would’ve fallen backwards if not for Erisna grabbing his tie, leaving him partially suspended over the ground. She smiled down at him and Techno somehow knew that this was the age she really died at, rather than the little girl she was previously.
“You’ve harmed all of us here,” she started. “Don’t forget that. Not everyone will forgive you. Not everyone was physically hurt. You cannot choose whether we forgive you or not. Good luck.” And with that she dropped him.
He hit the ground hard, air knocked out of him in a way that faintly reminded him of a field somewhere, a distant memory that he couldn’t quite grasp.
Standing over him, she smiled, a little bit of satisfaction creeping onto her face.
“We are the voices you hear, Techno. Every last one of us.”
“E!” Someone cried from the crowd, distantly, before being shushed by everyone around them.
“You ruined the drama, Camith,” Erisna said, rolling her eyes.
“Sorry!” Camith called back, only to be shushed again. Techno blinked confusedly, and Erisna just smiled a little.
“We don’t want you to give up your life, the way you live. We thrive on strong emotions, and your victories have quickly become our favorites. Don’t become a pacifist. Just be mindful,” she said, gently taking his hand and pulling him up to his feet, shrinking down to a little girl.
“When you get out of here, remember us?” Erisna said, in her sweet childlike voice, and Technoblade nodded before he fully realized what she said, jolting slightly before shaking his head.
“Wait- when?” Techno asked, and she smiled.
“Technoblade never dies.”
And with that she turned around, exiting into the crowd.
A new face and a new name and a new story took her place, dancing with him, calmly explaining how he had been hurt by Technoblade before sending him into the crowd.
Over and over and over again, new faces, people he doesn’t remember but that he hurt, danced with him. Some were angrier than others, purposefully stepping on his feet as they explained what he did to them.
Some of them were sweet, could barely dance, old women who had just wanted sons and grandchildren to come home but wouldn’t.
Others were tired, forced to fight for a king they didn’t want, grateful that Technoblade and someone they referred to as ‘the Angel of Death,’ freed their country.
One that was particularly memorable was an older man who blamed himself. “Really, it was my fault, I should’ve backed off when I saw you covered in blood in the middle of the woods, but curiosity got the better of me.”
Technoblade still apologized, but the man brushed him off quickly, slapping the back of Techno’s shoulder roughly, the way a father or a good friend might.
Several came up all at once, and the music turned more upbeat, turning into some sort of circle dance that Techno’s bones knew but that he couldn’t remember learning. They spoke of a time in their town when someone dropped a jar on his foot and he went on a rampage. When they started reminiscing, they remarked on the humor of it, the first victim joking about how “they had always been clumsy” and that “it finally came to bite them in the butt”.
Techno committed each person to memory, promising them and himself that he wouldn’t forget them. That he would be more careful, be watchful, and he made more promises than he ever had before.
After a girl explained that Techno had killed her fiancé, and he apologized profusely, said fiancé came up behind her, introducing himself, forgiving Techno and leading her away, a new man took her place, clothed in green, wings trailing behind him as he stepped up to Techno, grabbing at his wrist rather than the hand Techno offered.
“How did I hurt you?” Techno asked him gently.
“You didn’t,” the man said, his voice was familiar, gripping at his very soul with something dark and unusual. He tugged on Techno, trying to pull him out of the ballroom, but Techno didn’t budge.
“You must’ve been hurt by me. That’s the only way you’re able to get in,” Techno said firmly, and the man sighed.
“It’s not important at the moment. We have to go,” his wings were flaring behind him, the view spilling into his mind, twisting his nonexistent memories to cause emotion.
“Who are you?” Technoblade asked, and the winged man looked at him for a moment before shaking his head.
“C’mon Techno, we’ve got to get out of here,”
“Who are you? How did I hurt you?” Techno asked again, and the man paused.
“Snap out of it. We’re going back to the land of the living,” he said, and Techno shook his head.
“I can’t leave,” he said softly. “I need to make things right here.” The man turned sharply, blue eyes sharp as he searched Technoblade.
“You need to fix things with the living. With me,” the man said, and Techno yanked his arm out of the hold the man had on it.
“How did I hurt you?”
“Techno-“
“Answer me.”
“You died. You left me. Is that what you wanted to hear? Now, I’ve come here to get you out, and you need to come with me,” the man said.
“I left you?” Techno asked and the man nodded, turning abruptly.
“Yes. You were dumb and saved my life and… hurt me by leaving me. So now I’m back for you okay?” he said, but Techno was barely focused on him, instead transfixed on an eerily familiar earring. He slowly reached for it, and the man leaned back at first.
“Please?” Techno asked and the man nodded, letting Techno gently hold the earring in his hand.
He turned the gem over and over for a moment, admiring the way it gleamed in the light before he reached to his own ear and pulled out the earring, putting it next to the man’s.
“They’re the same,” Techno said, and the man nodded.
“Yeah. They’re friendship emeralds.”
Techno’s chest went tight, and he gripped at it tightly, the man’s face contorting in concern as Techno dropped to his knees.
“Techno!” he said frantically. “Take a deep breath.”
Memories flickered through his skull, filling in the empty slots, reappearing faster than Techno could keep up, until it cleared and he looked up at his friend- the one he had hurt.
“Philza?” Techno asked quietly, and Phil’s eyes widened.
“You remember,” he said, face splitting into a smile, tugging at Techno’s arm again. “C’mon, we need to go. I’m glad you remember but we need to get out,” he said quickly, and Techno nodded, moving to stand only for his legs to crumple underneath him.
“Phil?” Techno said, as he struggled to stand or move, becoming groggier and groggier.
“What- oh no,” he said and Techno squinted at him for a moment. “She knows I’m here. We needed to be out of here already, c’mon,” he said, hefting Techno up, shoving a shoulder under his arm, supporting most of Techno’s weight as he started walking them towards the door, moving as quickly as he could.
After a long while of hazy marble floors that cracked under their feet, Techno being unable to look up, head lolling as they turned and scurried down hallway after hallway, Philza stopped.
“Hey, hey Technoblade? I’m going to go check if the entrance is where it should be. You just have to stay here and awake, can you do that for me?” Philza asked, hands gripping Technoblade’s shoulders tightly.
Techno nodded (or nodded to the best of his ability, it was more his head flopping up and down). Phil gave him a nod of his own before heading down the hall with a speed Techno didn’t know he possessed.
“Gotta stay awake,” he said to himself, peering at the artwork that lined the walls. The scene was familiar, but Technoblade couldn’t focus on it for long enough to realize what it was. There was a suit of armor on the far end of the hall. It faintly resembled the armor Techno made for himself, although his had more dents and scratches than the pristine one standing there.
“Stay awake,” he said again as his head hit the wall behind him. He sank down to sit, his legs having put in a valiant effort but eventually giving up.
“Awake.”
His eyes closed.
“Techno. Tech, you’ve gotta wake up man,” Philza’s voice said, and Techno opened his eyes, Phil smiling down at him. “There you are. We have to go, I found the exit.”
Techno nodded, and Phil yanked Techno to standing, hurrying down the hall.
Techno’s legs felt numb. His entire body felt numb as he tried to keep up with Phil through hall after hall, each filled with beautiful, valuable things, but Phil didn’t even glance at them, only looking at Techno occasionally before continuing to guide them through this palace that he seemed to know so well.
They came to a screeching halt when a door opened in front of him, Technoblade’s guide stepping through, cloak floating gently around her as she looked at them with a smile.
“Philza. You’ve returned.”
“Hi. Kristin. Hi. Hello,” Phil stammered, practically holding Techno up as they stood together. Death peered at them for a moment before nodding.
“Please, come in,” she said welcomingly, and they shuffled into the room after her, Phil gently helping Techno into a seat while she poured what looked like tea for them.
“How’ve you been, Philza?” Death asked, and Phil awkwardly nodded, glancing at Techno for a moment.
“I’ve been better,” he said, and she smiled.
“Most people prefer the surface for a multitude of reasons,” she said pleasantly, and Phil nodded, sipping the tea even as his hand gripped Techno’s wrist underneath the table, a subtle reminder to stay awake.
Death’s teacup was set in the saucer with a clink.
“Why’re you trying to steal Technoblade from me?” she asked calmly, hand smoothing the tablecloth.
“You wouldn’t understand,” Phil said quickly, stepping in front of him.
“I know you too well for this Philza. I want the truth.”
“He‘s a good person,” Phil said slowly. “It’s hard to explain.”
“Try? For me?”
“He’s important. And I’m not going to live without him or die without him. I refuse to spend eternity apart,” Phil said, and Technoblade was feeling quite a few emotions (not that he would ever tell Phil that).
“And if I decide to keep him anyway?”
“Then you’ll need to keep me as well.”
“And if I choose to keep both of you?” Death asked, and Phil’s mouth opened and then closed briefly.
“If you keep both of us,“ Techno was slurring his words, the sentence blending together haphazardly, “we will spend all of eternity trying to escape.”
Phil stared at him for a second, clearly trying to convey that what Techno had just said was the wrong thing to say, the grip on his wrist tightened.
Meanwhile, Death just looked at them with pondering eyes, cloak moving on it’s own. A rose on her hat lost a petal, the petal seeming to fall in slow motion until it landed on the table.
“Fair enough. You may leave out the way you came,” Death said, rather suddenly, and Philza gaped at her for a moment.
“We can go?” he asked.
“Yes,” she said, finally picking up her tea cup again. “Although if I finish my tea, I’m keeping his soul and yours, so move along.”
Philza lurched up, scrambling up and out of his chair.
“Thank you, Kristin. Love you Kristin,” he said quickly before yanking Technoblade to his feet again.
“We’re leaving?” Techno asked, and Phil nodded.
“Yup. And if you have any strength in your legs I’m going to need you to use it now,” Phil said, practically dragging Techno’s entire body weight as he struggled to get his feet under himself.
“Why would you do this for me?” Techno asked as they rounded a corner, faced with a steep set of stairs.
“You mean more to me than I care to admit, Techno,” Philza said, beginning the climb up the stairs, pausing at almost every step to help pull Techno’s feet up.
“Really?” Techno asked, and Phil huffed.
“Is that seriously your question?” Phil was out of breath, working Techno’s limbs up the stairs.
“Yes.”
“I literally flew down to the underworld for you and you’re asking me if I care about you. Figures.”
Step by step, Phil got them up the stairs, and at the very top, there was a platform that seemed to lead to nowhere.
“Phil?” he asked and Phil glanced at him.
“Techno. Can you just… stand here, with your arms out? For thirty seconds?” Phil asked, and Technoblade nodded. Then Phil let go of him and he almost face planted, if not for Phil holding his shoulders steady, waiting patiently for Techno to regain his balance.
He ran behind Techno, and almost immediately after, Techno was being hefted up into the air, a familiar breeze dancing along his face. He looked over to see Philza’s face, squinted in concentration as he focused on lifting almost three times his normal weight into the sky.
As they rose up, Techno’s head became less foggy, his limbs became stronger, he was able to help Phil as much as he could, adjusting the way his weight hung to make it easier.
Phil glanced at him briefly, giving a small nod, a faint smile appearing on his face even as he hefted them ever higher.
“Uh… Phil?” Techno said, when he noticed they were approaching solid rock.
“Trust me,” he said through grit teeth, and that was good enough for Techno.
As they grew nearer, Techno spotted an opening in the rocks, just wide enough for Phil. Techno was adjusted, until he was pressed almost seamlessly against Phil, and they were launched up through the opening.
Phil executed a quick spin, tucking in his wings briefly as they squeezed between rocks. Techno didn’t like this very much. Didn’t like that Philza could barely open his wings to propel them upward and definitely didn’t like the sharp rocks on either side.
All Techno could hope for was that Phil knew what he was doing, remembered the path he took to get down and would be able to fly them through.
Technoblade could faintly see blue through the open crack, fresh air pulling them in. Phil gave one final powerful beat of his wings and they squeezed through the opening, flopping onto the surface, practically giddy, laughing as they stared at the green all around them, basking in the sunlight.
He pulled the boar skull off his face, letting the sun deep into his skin, erasing the cold he had been feeling. Techno looked at Phil, and his smile fell as the ballroom swirled to the front of his mind.
“I’ve hurt so many people,” Techno said quietly, and Philza turned, his smile falling off his face.
“I know.”
“Why would you let me- why?” he asked, and Phil looked away.
“It was easiest,” he said, sounding honest and for once Techno wanted Phil to lie to him. “And because you didn’t seem to mind. Death is a natural part of life.”
“Why didn’t you let Death keep me?”
“I’m not going to lose you. Not yet,” Phil said firmly.
“I deserve death,” Technoblade said, and Phil sighed.
“Maybe you do. But the fact of the matter is that Kristin let me steal you away, so at the very least, you’re allowed to stay here,” Phil said, and Techno swallowed roughly.
“Okay.”
“And if you want, you can try to make things better up here.”
“Okay.”
“Many of them forgave you. I could see it in their eyes. I talked to them. They just wanted you to know their names and faces, but they forgave you,” Philza said.
“I know. It’s just… so many of them didn’t. And there were so many,” he said and Phil tilted his head a little, in the way that made him look like a bird.
“You can’t dwell on it. You can’t change it,” Philza said, and Techno nodded. “You have to move past this. You’re alive again, that’s what counts.”
“I suppose,” Techno said quietly, staring up at the bright blue sky, the sun warm on his skin and the grass soft underneath his feet. It was cold in the ballroom. He closed his eyes, running through the names and faces in his mind, willing himself into remembering them all.
“I want to find the people who killed me,” Techno said after a moment, and Phil peered at him.
“I may or may not know where they plan on resting for the night, and the bar where they’ve been bragging about your death,” Phil said, a smile forming on his face as he sat up, and Technoblade grimaced for a moment, wondering if he should go through with this, so quickly revert to his old ways, Phil watching him hesitantly.
“Blood for the Blood God?” Phil asked, and voices seeped through the edges of Techno’s mind, settling into their rightful positions. A few of the voices were clearer than before, wishing him luck, reminding him that violence isn’t always bad, and that they are behind the decision he makes.
“Blood for the Blood God,” Techno said, and Phil pulled him to his feet.
“Let's find those bastards.”
The voices cheered.