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He was surely insane. There was no other explanation for this. Theon didn’t care though, he knew a part of his mind would be left restless forevermore if he allowed his former captor to die brutally, even if he deserved worse fates.
Theon couldn’t let it happen, as macabre as it sounded, his feelings towards Ramsay were all true. He never pretended anything for him. He hated Ramsay, he wished for his death every night he slept in the same kennel he was awkwardly walking inside. But he loved him. He loved his master, loved his lord. He made Theon love him, he made Theon into his subservient pet. His favorite pet. And this part of his mind that he was able to suppress slightly when escaping Winterfell with Sansa screamed at him to not let Ramsay die. ‘Reek’ could never let his master die, Reek… wanted nothing more than to serve dutifully his beloved Ramsay Bolton.
A sigh escaped his mind as he approached the figure tied in the chair, battered and bloody from the beating he received from Jon. He hated how it pained to see him this way. This was a bad idea, he knew he could be executed for treason if he went through with this. But it frightened him the notion that Reek could never truly leave his mind if he didn’t heed his final desire as him.
He observes Ramsay for a small while before shaking him slightly, hoping he would wake up. When he gets no response he shakes him more strongly, trying his best to not disturb the sleeping hounds who were voracious with hunger. This was Sansa’s plan for his death, fitting he thought. That he should die devoured by the hounds he so much adored.
But it was just as fitting that he would be saved from such demise by his most adored dog.
Ramsay finally opened his eyes, he looked up to Theon, visibly confused.
His piercing pale grey eyes seemed to shine in the dark of the kennel, these same eyes he had grown so accustomed to. The eyes that struck so much fear in his heart but the same eyes that looked so gentle to an unknowing passerby. These same eyes that devoured him at every opportunity they could.
He’s shaking, this was his last chance to back away and leave him to die. But he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t let Ramsay die.
He surged forward, hugging his former captor tightly. He buries his face in Ramsay’s hair. It smelled of dried blood and sweat, but he could care less. Theon felt relieved to see him alive.
“I-I’m so sorry, my lord…” He started sobbing. “Forgive me for my treason, please my lord!” he said. Theon kept muttering ‘my lord’ as he sobbed into Ramsay’s hair.
Ramsay didn’t respond, so Theon leaned back to look at him again. He cupped his cheeks and smiled. He leaned in and pressed his lips to Ramsay, to show him he wasn’t lying or toying with him. That he was still his Reek and that he could trust him.
Theon sobbed into the kiss, his mind a complete and unexplainable mess. He decided to not think about it, he knew he wouldn’t be able to complete his task if he heeded his confused mind right now. He leaned back and opened his eyes, Ramsay was obviously too tired to really say anything so he just kept staring at him with bewildered eyes.
As much as he was trembling, Theon had to try to untie the ropes that bound his master as quickly as he could and as quietly as he could. He learned by being in Ramsay’s hold that when he was under the most amount of fear and stress that he was able to work as efficiently as he could under worse odds and conditions, before he had sore hands for not well healed scars of amputated fingers and constant pains but now that he’s managed to regain some health, this would be an easy task.
“What are you doing?” Ramsay managed to muster some strength to speak hoarsely.
“Setting you free, my lord.” Said Theon, focused on untying the ropes.
“Have you gone completely mad?”
Theon doesn’t answer. Maybe he did. Maybe Ramsay broke his mind beyond repair. Because part of him screams for him to hate Ramsay. But he is urged to serve him, urged to let his lord free, his oh so dear Ramsay Bolton. He will not allow him to die or Reek won’t ever let Theon live the rest of his days in peace, knowing he abandoned his love to be eaten by his dogs.
Once he was done, he helped Ramsay stand up the best he could, he was still fragile and weak and Ramsay was heavy and bulky, but he endured it as he allowed him to lean on him to stand up. They had to be quick about it, even with Ramsay like this proving to be a hindrance.
Theon was sure nobody was around by the time he sneaked in the kennel, he looked around for anyone while he steadied Ramsay by his side. His heart was racing, for good reason, if he was found out he would be executed alongside his captor and he didn’t want to die now of all times.
Ramsay groaned lightly in pain and Theon just shushed him, whispering “We need to be quiet my lord…”
Thankfully, they were not out of luck today, they managed to leave the fortress unnoticed to a more secluded area where Theon had kept a horse for Ramsay to ride. Ramsay lifted his gaze from the ground to the animal in front of him. Theon still held Ramsay with one arm, he swallowed. He felt anxious, he trembled from the adrenaline and from the cold while his lord felt more limp on his touch due to the pain. He hoped he would be able to withstand the trip to wherever he decided to ride to, he knew Ramsay more intimately than he ever wished he would so he thinks Ramsay would never give in to this pain he was feeling and he hoped he was right, if he died moments after being freed, Theon would be consumed by the guilt.
“What is this?” Ramsay asked weakly. His gaze was tired when he looked back to Theon, awaiting an explanation.
“For you, my lord.” his voice shaking from his trembling. “I-I know you’re in pain… but you have to go.” Theon looked to the ground, averting his lord’s piercing gaze. “If you don’t… they’re gonna k-kill you.... I won’t be able to help you then, this is all I can do and I can only do it right now, please… Please my lord, please go.” He knew how much Ramsay hated hearing him saying please, but he didn’t know what else to say. He felt his eyes heavy with tears, but Theon didn’t want to cry in front of him. He clinged to Ramsay, gripping his chest tightly as he nuzzled his neck, trying his hardest to hold his damn tears.
This was a giant act of treason, Theon knew. If he was caught like this with Ramsay… It would make things even more complicated. But this was farewell, Reek needed this.
“I’m sorry my lord.” Not being able to contain a sob, Theon muttered. “I’m sorry for betraying you… Forgive me.”
Ramsay slowly petted Theon’s head, the gentle hand of his master surprising him. He slowly stroked Theon’s unkempt hair, the touch he was so used to at this point.
“My most loyal pet until the end… My precious Reek.” He said, Theon lifted his head to look at Ramsay. He smiled weakly and shook his head slightly. “You foolish dog… I deserved a painful death, do you realise what you did?”
Theon says nothing. He knows he’s in the wrong. He wasn’t doing this for Ramsay, this wasn’t a selfless act of mercy on the possibility Ramsay’s soul contained even the slightest drop of good, it was a selfish act. Releasing this monster back into the wild was not selfless, it was insanity. But this was Reek’s whims, he could never sleep well again if he didn’t free Ramsay. His only hope was that he would terrorize people far away from Winterfell, far away from Westeros even.
Ramsay cups his cheek, running a thumb through it. Theon kept looking at his eyes, hoping he would just do something. Not go through with it, kill Theon on the spot and make it look like he managed to escape, something Ramsay would do. Maybe he was asking too much from a bruised man with a pair of broken ribs.
“I love you, my lord.” And that was the terrible truth, Theon really did love him. That’s why he had to let him go, if he was executed he was sure he would never be able to abandon these twisted feelings Ramsay had implanted in his mind, a last act of service as Reek. The last time he would breathe as Reek.
“And here I thought, you were just lying to get on my good side.” Theon wasn’t sure if what he saw in Ramsay’s expression was some sort of vulnerability or it was just the soreness and pain on his face, regardless it was still something he never saw in his lord’s eyes and it frightened him.
“Go, my lord. Run, start your life anew.” He grabbed Ramsay’s arms and squeezed them. “And don’t ever look back, at Winterfell, at…” Me. He wished to say. He swallowed the word. “Or this will all be for naught.”
He expected some sort of witty maniacal retort he grew accustomed to, instead Ramsay leans in slowly and kisses Theon’s cheek. Saying nothing, Ramsay limped towards the horse, having a bit of trouble climbing up to the saddle but being able to do it by himself nonetheless.
Ramsay looked down to Theon.
Theon wished desperately for him to not utter words of gratitude.
“Why not come with me, Reek?”
He was sure he’d say something of the like.
“This is the last time we’ll ever see each other my lord, I’m afraid."
Ramsay smiled slightly. He looked to the layers of infinite snow that covered Winterfell, then back to Theon.
“Farewell, sweet little Reek.” From atop his horse, Ramsay petted Theon’s head again.
“Farewell, my lord… Be safe.”
Theon patted the horse’s back, sending Ramsay off to wherever he would go. Maybe south to King’s Landing or even farther north to beyond the wall.
Theon watched the horse drift farther and farther away. Hoping from the bottom of his heart Ramsay would not look back at him. Or his worst fears might come to life.
Unfortunately for him, his wishes didn’t come true. He felt his eyes widen as he saw Ramsay looking back at him, from this distance he couldn’t tell what his face told him but just the act itself was enough to tell Theon everything.
Theon covered his mouth and dropped to his knees. Ramsay… would never forget him. This would not be the last time they would see each other.
Theon sobbed. Tears of relief from the corners of his broken mind to see his former lord alive and freed, tears of regret for his treason and most importantly he cried because Ramsay would be alive somewhere, thinking of him and this would haunt him until the end of his days. Why couldn’t he be a complete monster right up until the end!? He thought.
It didn’t matter anymore.
If they ever met again, he was sure that at least he would face him as Theon Greyjoy, not as his pet Reek.
He rubbed his eyes and got up.
Ramsay’s words echoed in his mind. What is your name?
He knew the answer now.