Chapter Text
"Are we there yet?!"
Jungkook rolled his eyes as his younger brother yelled that question for the fifth time. They had only been in the car for two hours. In the front, his parents laughed and his mother, Jangmi, turned around to give Junghyun a fond look. Junghyun was smiling with glee, an easy smugness shining through from telling a successful 'joke'; something most children feel at some point because adults make a fuss as though its the funniest thing they've ever heard.
In the back of his mind, Jungkook knew he was being harsh. Junghyun was only seven. Jungkook had most definitely done similar attempts at 'comedy' when he was that age, and his parents had reacted the exact same way. Jungkook was eighteen now though. He was eighteen and this was his last summer before he moved out and started university. He was meant to be an adult and he could do what he wanted. That included staying up until four am playing video games online with his friends. Unfortunately he still had to get up at seven am with his family to be on the road by eight for the family vacation his mother had arranged. He was extremely tired now and very grumpy because of it. He usually wouldn't mind spending time with his family at all, he really liked them and they all enjoyed being together, but he was not in the right place for and not looking forward to a vacation across the country with extended family that he definitely did not like. If it had just been the four of them then maybe he would have been okay, despite how tired he was and how insecure he felt right now. It wasn't just going to be them though and that was pushing Jungkook to the edge.
His brother turned back to his game on his switch, sated for now until he once again felt the need to release his comedic genius upon the car. Jungkook liked the game he was playing, he could get his own switch out and play with him. His parents went back to softly discussing some gossip about their neighbours. Jungkook had heard the gossip and he knew from experience that they would have included him in the conversation. Either of those would make the trip go faster and make it much more enjoyable for Jungkook. He didn't feel social and cooperative though. He felt grumpy and tight. He turned away to look out the window and turned his music up. There was a sick satisfaction in stewing in his own bad mood though and Jungkook felt far enough still in the realms of being a moody teenager to let himself have that right now.
Society seemed to have this idea that once you turned eighteen you were an adult, and before that you were just a kid. There was no crossover. No one under eighteen could be mature and no one over eighteen could be childish. Obviously that was all bullshit. Jungkook had been plenty mature before he was eighteen. He had done things 'adults' did and acted more mature and more grown up than people twice his age. And he hadn't woken up on his eighteenth birthday suddenly with a new world view and unable to act 'childishly'. Understanding this didn't stop the pressure though. Jungkook felt it nipping at his heels with every decision he made, every emotion he experienced. It made him simultaneously hate himself for still being immature or childish at times, but also too bitter to move on and to try not act like that. It was like he was stuck in a limbo, unable to find a balance he needed between the two.
About an hour away from their destination, Jungkook's parents made the decision to stop for a quick break. Jangmi and Junghyun dashed to the toilets, the seven year old having inherited a tiny bladder from her, whereas Jungkook and his dad walked around the car to stretch their legs. As much as Jungkook wanted to get the journey over and done with, he was grateful for the fresh air and the chance to work out the ache starting in his muscles. They were close enough that Jungkook thought he could already start to smell the salt of the sea in the air. It was exciting. As much as Jungkook didn't want to be excited about this holiday, he had always loved the sea. There was something just so inviting and immense about it. He was looking forward to being able to exist by it again.
Jungkook stretched his arms above his head and let that sense in the air wash over him. This would have been okay if it had just been him, like when he went hiking on weekends. Just him and nature. Peace and Quiet as he connected with the essence of the world as he matured and started to find his place in it. It wasn't like that though. It was loud and annoying. It was going to be Jungkook doing things he didn't want to and feeling bitter and uncomfortable. It was going to be him forced back down to being a child and hating every second of it.
"Hey, Kook." Jungkook turned to Minseok, his father, who was leant against the car and watching Jungkook with a calculating expression. This was where he got lectured, right? Got told to stop sulking and try have fun as this trip was for their whole family, and it mattered a lot to his mum and to his brother. Maybe that was what should have happened. Jungkook's dad held up the car keys and jingled them in the air between them. "You wanna drive the rest of the way there?"
Jungkook beamed and nodded quickly, easily catching the keys his dad then tossed at him. He had only passed his test a few months ago and hadn't had much opportunity to get behind a wheel himself. He loved it though. And the idea of driving on these wide open roads, seeing the sea appearing in the distance and get closer as he drove them towards it, sounded pretty magical to Jungkook. He got into the front seat quickly, readjusting the seat and the mirrors and taking all the necessary precautions as his dad watched approvingly from the passenger seat beside him. When his mum and Junghyun returned they tumbled into the back seat together. Neither mentioned Jungkook now being the driver and Jungkook wondered if his parents had planned to let him do this from the start. Either way didn't really matter as he got to pull away from the services and back onto the road, feeling the car purr with life underneath his foot and the metal body glide with a simple twist of his wrists. He didn't feel half as tired anymore with something to focus on and the excitement burning in his veins.
"Are we there yet?!" Junghyun bellowed out for the ninth time, and his parents laughter once again followed. Jungkook couldn't find the same amount of annoyance in him as previous though. It was still childish and annoying, but he felt like he had the whole world open ahead of him again.
-
Kang Seolhyun and Doyoon's house was quite spectacular in all honesty. Even Jungkook, not really wanting to be there, could appreciate the beauty of it and feel an excitement at getting to stay in a house like this.
Jungkook's mother's sister was only a few years older than her. Seolhyun had always known what she wanted. She went to university and studied business, always top of her class and getting job offers from some of the biggest companies in the country. She already knew what she would be doing with her degree and her skills though. Doyoon had attended the same university as Seolhyun, studying creative writing. He had a talent. The two had fallen in love, and Seolhyun tuned down her myriad of offers other people would dream of to be his manager and agent. With his writing and her management, it didn't take long before Doyoon's books were on the best sellers list. They settled in this seaside town, and Seolhyun was taken by a bar on the beach. It wasn't doing well but she saw potential. She bought the bar despite people warning her not to, and after a rough few years, she made it the place to be. Locals and tourists alike flocked to the bar. With the successful books and the successful bar, they could afford the beautiful, large house on the sea front and the expensive lives they lead. They could afford to extend that to their family members as well and Jungkook's family now got to reap the benefits.
Seolhyun and Doyoon were waiting for them outside the front of the house when Jungkook pulled up. There was a part of Jungkook that held him to the seat. He could let the rest of his family get out and get their bags and then drive off. He could go back home and enjoy his time with complete autonomy and complete freedom. His family would still have a great time with the sun and the beach, and they could do family stuff back in the city when they got back. Win, win. Jungkook's hand even twitched towards the key to start the ignition again. He looked back outside though. He looked at his family and his mother looked back at him. She looked hopeful and excited but scared and Jungkook knew he couldn't go anywhere. All she wanted was or her families to come together, to enjoy a week with her sister and her husband and children. But if she had to choose...if Jangmi had to she'd choose her husband and children and leave to follow Jungkook back home. She'd proven that once before.
Jungkook took the keys out of the ignition and left the car. The air-con had been on for hours and the inside of the car had been wonderful, outside was muggy and uncomfortable with the high sun and no breeze. Jungkook really regretted wearing jeans and a long-sleeved top for the journey. It had felt right earlier that morning. If he was going to be grumpy anyway he might as well be as grumpy as possible by being uncomfortable as well. But with how overwhelming this weather was he regretted it now.
"Look at Jungkook." Seolhyun cooed and came over to pat Jungkook's hair before pulling him into a hug. "He's gotten so big." She turned back to his mother and Jungkook glared at her back.
"Yeah, I have." He grumbled. The same thing happened every time, but it still got to Jungkook every time. He turned to his mother who just shook her head, eyes alight with amusement, and Jungkook pouted. No matter how old he was surely his mother should stick up for him, not simply enjoy his suffering.
Junghyun led the way into the house, running as fast his little legs could allow and the others followed, deciding to get the luggage later - apart from Jungkook who had grabbed his backpack and laptop bag. He and Jangmi fell behind, her wrapping an arm around his waist. He was taller than her now. Long gone was the little boy who had clung to her skirts and looked up at her because that was all he could reach. Now he could look over the top of her head and it was her only reaching his waist.
"Don't be upset sweetheart. She hardly sees you and its hard for her to remember your not eight anymore." She said softly and squeezed his waist.
"Even if I was eight, I would deserve to be spoken to and not about." He pulled away slightly to raise an eyebrow at his mother.
She sighed. "I know. I'm sorry." And she was. Jungkook could tell she really meant it. But she always let it happen.
Junghyun had already found his way to their cousins, and they were shouting and yelling and jumping around. Jungkook was not ready to deal with that at all. He escaped upstairs to the room he would be staying in and changed into a pair of shorts and a loose top. He felt better once his skin could breath - and his mind too. He knew the mature thing to do was to go down then. He should be nice and polite and talk to his family, maybe attempt to play with his cousins. It would make his parents happy. It would give a good impression to his aunt and uncle. Jungkook was tired again though and he felt like his patience and his emotional availability had run dry for the day already. He stayed in the room. He sorted his things out, putting his clothes and toiletries away and setting his laptop up on the desk. He took his time to make it his space. This was going to be his safe haven for the two weeks they were spending here. It had to feel right.
Jungkook went back down eventually because he couldn't hide forever, especially since his stomach wouldn't let him. They had a quick late lunch and then all headed out to the beach. Jungkook loved the beach. He loved the sea, whether it was calm and settled and inviting, or rough and stormy and fascinating to watch. He loved the way sand felt against his skin, whether warmed by the sun or chilled by the night. The scent of the salt in the air was stronger there beside the waves and it filled Jungkook with excitement. Looking out over the sea, he couldn't help but think of the other countries and cultures out there, all connected by these bodies of water. Jungkook stood in the sea, the waves licking his calves, and looked out over the expanse. How many other people around the world were doing the same thing he was? What were they like? How did they live their lives? Would Jungkook ever get to see their countries, experience their cultures? Being on the beach filled Jungkook with wanderlust. It made him feel free and untethered. He could walk further into those waves and be swept away to another land and another life.
A shrill scream came from beside him and suddenly his left side was wet. Jungkook looked down to see the water over his top and then over to Junghyun and one of their cousins playfighting in the shallows and splashing water all over the place. Jungkook sighed and left the water, heading back up the beach to where his family were sat enjoying the sun. Jungkook loved the beach regardless, but he appreciated it a lot less when it was full and overwhelming like it was today. Towels and umbrellas almost lined the whole beach as far as he could see, and the shallows were filled with people and inflatables. It was loud and it was busy. It was the school holidays and families had come from far and wide to enjoy the weather. Other people could ruin the atmosphere for him.
Jungkook sat down on a spare towel beside where his mother was sunbathing and leant his chin on his knees. He didn't mind crowds really. Sometimes he actually enjoyed being in them, enjoyed being surrounded by life and emotion. He didn't like them on beaches though. And he didn't like them right now when he was feeling as...lost as he was. He wanted peace and time to self reflect and to come to terms with the changes in his life. He wanted a chance to feel comfortable in being lost and that freedom rather than it weighing him down. He could not do that in a situation like this. At least he could people watch though. That was always interesting, and it kept him distracted and not having to interact with his family.
He still kept aware of them though, and when Seolhyun suddenly stood up from where she was sunbathing and brushed herself off, Jungkook turned his full attention to his aunt, intrigued despite himself. "I need to check the bar." She nudged Jangmi with her foot and smiled down at her. "Come with me and have look. We redecorated."
Jangmi grumbled but it was good-natured and she got up as well, throwing a dress over her bathing suit. Jungkook got to his feet as well. "I'll come." Jungkook had been trying to avoid his extended family as much as he could as being with them did take it out of him, but seeing the bar actually sounded interesting. He knew it had to be popular for a reason. And it definitely sounded better than sitting on the beach with nothing to do.
Seolhyun looked a him and sighed. "It's my bar Jungkook. I don't really want to get a bad reputation for letting kids in." She pursed her lips and raised her eyebrows.
"But I'm eighteen-"
"You should come as well, Minseok." Seolhyun cut over Jungkook, swiftly turning from and to the men still sat on their towels. Jungkook's father nodded and he and Doyoon got up as well.
"Let's all go." Doyoon suggest with a wide smile. "Jungkook can look after the kids for us."
Jungkook scoffed, but they all looked at him expectantly. "Fine. You bar is probably shitty anyway." He spat out and stormed closer to where the three children were playing in the sea.
"Jungkook." He heard his mother scold him. He didn't turn back though and he heard them eventually gather themselves and head off.
Jungkook crossed his arms as he watched the people in the sea. He had actually got excited about seeing the bar. He had not been looking forward to this trip from the moment his mother first announced it. However, getting to see Seolhyun's bar had lit a small fire in him. Jungkook had seen the praise and reviews it got online. New he was eighteen he wanted to experience it himself as an adult. It was really the only great place in the area that was for adults, not for kids or for families. He felt like it was the only thing he would fully enjoy. If he was allowed to actually get to experience it.
Fuck his family. Seriously. Jungkook was eighteen. He was legally allowed to go to bars and buy alcohol and drink when he wanted. He was an adult by law and by societal expectations. But of course Seolhyun didn't see it that way. In her eyes, he was still too much of a child to be allowed to go to an adult place. He was too much of a kid to be trusted and respected and given that opportunity. Yet, he was still enough of an adult to be trusted to watch over his cousins. He wasn't too much of a child to have that responsibility. He couldn't get the good parts of being an adult, but he had to put up with the sucky parts as long as it worked to his family's advantage. It wasn't fair.
He had hoped now he was eighteen and it had been a while since they had visited, things would be different. Yet it was all still the same.
Since he was born, Jangmi's family didn't know what to do with Jungkook or how to treat him. Jangmi and Minseok has both been young when they had Jungkook. She was in her first year of university, and he in his second. Eighteen and nineteen with a baby. Jangmi's family hadn't agreed with her choice to keep Jungkook, and they had only offered financial support. Jungkook's parents had refused that financial support. They could do it on their own and they wanted to prove it. Minseok worked long hours, Jangmi picked up odd shifts. His mother didn't have time for friends and they couldn't afford childcare. Jungkook and his mothers spent all their time together for his first few years of life. They were the closest two people could be. Jungkook was always more mature than other people his age because of this. His parents had just started their adult lives and were experimenting and thoroughly enjoying it and they didn't do too much to keep Jungkook away from it all. He was involved in gossip and bitching about colleagues and friends, he had always been encouraged to openly discuss sex and sexuality and gender, he was allowed to watch films and shows well above his age with his parents there to discuss any issues that arose. It was a unique situation. But it worked. Jangmi's parents weren't ready for grandchildren, her sister and brother were still in school, and they didn't know how to act with a child in the family. They also had strict thoughts on how a child should be raised and they couldn't adapt to the way Jungkook was being raised. So they all just pretty much ignored him.
Seolhyun had her first when Jungkook was nine years old. Her first born, a daughter, was had a 'reasonable' time in Seolhyun's life and was raised right. That opened the door. Jungkook was more accepted. Jangmi and Minseok had Junghyun, Seolhyun and Doyoon had a son, and Jangmi's brother had two sons over the next years. The family stopped ignoring Jungkook, but they didn't treat him like the mature thirteen year old he was by then. He was treated on the same level as the younger children. In a way, that was even worse. He suffered through it though and hoped he wouldn't have to deal with it once he was eighteen. He was an adult now. He was over age. Hell, when his mother was his age she had a child. Yet, here he was still being treated like a child most of the time. Apart from the odd times when him being an adult worked in their advantage, then they would accept it. His parents just went along with it as well. They didn't like outward conflict and his mother really didn't want anything to ruin her relationship with her family now she had them back fully.
Jungkook seemed to be just expected to deal with it for their sake.
When the four returned from the bar, Jungkook had stopped seething. Mostly. He was still pissed, but he wasn't just stewing in it anymore. They had been on the beach for a few hours and with the sun high and the water washing against their skin, reapplying sunscreen was a must. He was sat on the towels with Junghyun between his legs as he covered his brother's shoulders and back with more. He'd already done his cousins and they were back playing in the water. They hadn't cared to sit and wait, running off as soon as Jungkook was done, but Junghyun could be chill. He was happy to sit and enjoy the sun and Jungkook massaging him as he babbled about how awesome sea creatures were. Jungkook enjoyed it as well. His brother did have some cool ideas. Junghyun's bright energy and happiness definitely had helped Jungkook crawl out of such a foul mood and back to something more level.
A table had been booked that night for dinner. For their first night there, the wanted to do something special. The place was nice but not overly fancy and Jungkook was glad he could get away with wearing some dark jeans and loose black shirt. The sun had set and there was thankfully a breeze in the air now, but it was still pretty warm. The restaurant was full. It wasn't a surprise as it was one of the most popular ones in the town, especially because of its place on the sea front with a beautiful view over the water. Jungkook would love to have a meal sat by the large windows, seeing the dark water in the night as he ate, either by himself or with someone he could exchange a calm conversation with. He didn't get to enjoy it that way though. The family area of the restaurant was on the other side of the room and so their table was there. Maybe they thought it was too dangerous for children to be beside windows, or they just wanted to save those tables for couples and business meals. Either way Jungkook had to spend this dinner on the other side of the room and not able to see out the windows over the many people sat between him and them.
It was made even worse when Jungkook ended up sat between his brother and his cousins with the rest of the adults on the other side of the table. They kept the conversation up between just them and Jungkook didn't even try to get involved. He ignored his cousins and talked to Junghyun about the crab he'd made friends with and named Chin-Hae. It wasn't exactly how he would have preferred to spend an evening in this restaurant but it was at least bearable and the food was good. They all cleared their plates, Jungkook wolfing down his steak and as much of the side dishes as he could get his hands on.
"Oh, Jungkook!" Jungkook looked up to his mother, a little shocked as she had ignored him all dinner so far. She was waving dessert menu at him and smiling widely. "They have strawberry cheesecake. Shall we partake?" Jungkook and Jangmi both loved strawberry cheesecake. They always had. It was always a treat that they shared together and just like every other time, Jungkook was excited about the idea of having it with his mother now. This is what should make up a family vacation to him, pockets of excitement and joy for everyone. Everyone should feel involved and enjoy themselves.
Jungkook smiled widely and nodded. But he was once again cut over by Seolhyun. "I've told the kids they're not allowed dessert already."
"I'm not a kid." Jungkook snapped back at her. He was sick of being treated like a child.
"It's okay." Jangmi said gently but quickly, and with an awkward smile. "Let's all not have dessert. Better for our figures."
Doyoon chuckled, Seolhyun pursed her lips, and Minseok shifted awkwardly. The three children were quiet, picking up on the tension but not really understanding it. Jungkook had had enough though. He pushed himself out of the chair and stormed away from the table without looking back. He was called out for by both of his parents but he ignored them. He needed fresh air. He sat down outside the restaurant. There, he could look out over the water he couldn't see from their table. He could calm down now. He felt a little silly for storming out - especially after he had just asserted he wasn't a kid, but it got to him so quickly. Worked him up so fast. It was soft spot for him really, struggling with his own sense of identity now that he was eighteen and going to university but still at home and not feeling ready.
It wasn't long before the rest of his family came out. Seolhyun , Doyoon and their children walked straight past Jungkook without even a look. That was probably fair. Jungkook got to his feet and brushed his thighs off, just in time for Junghyun to reach him and start running around his legs, giggling. Jungkook sighed and shook his head. How did this kid always have so much energy? Jungkook should understand it. He had definitely been the same when he was younger, and only six years ago there was a high chance he would have been running around with him. Not now though. He struggled to find the energy for that anymore. And struggled to find the freedom from expectations and his own thoughts.
"Come on you, little rascal." Jangmi called, and Junghyun immediately course corrected and ran towards her. Jangmi laughed and pushed him off to follow the others back to the house. "At least he'll sleep well tonight." She smiled at Jungkook and then went off with Junghyun, and Jungkook was left with his father.
"Alright, Jungkook," His father started, and Jungkook expected to be told off for how he had acted. Once again today Minseok took him by surprise, and once again Jungkook was handed keys. "These are the keys to your aunt's place. You're right. You're not a child anymore, you're an adult. So you should get to come and go as you please. You don't have to come back at the little dude's bedtime just because we have to as well. You can have your own time and do your own things as well."
Jungkook looked down at the keys in his hand and gripped them in his fist tightly. He smiled at his father and nodded. "Thank you."
"You're welcome." Minseok chuckled and threw an arm around Jungkook's shoulders. "Come here, you brat." He hugged Jungkook tightly, and Jungkook wrapped his arms around his waist to hug him back.
Like driving on the way up had make Jungkook feel free and in control, the keys to house did as well. He had some freedom here. It maybe wasn't enough, maybe only masked what he was actually going through and the actual tensions between them all right now. But, he was being treated like an adult finally and given free reign to explore the town and the local attractions. To explore himself. And he knew exactly where he was going to start.
"I'm going out tonight." Jungkook told his father when they pulled away. He had to fight down the urge to ask if it was okay. He didn't have to ask. He had already been given open permission. And he was an adult anyway. A quick check to ensure he had his phone and he had his wallet and he corrected himself. "Actually, I'm going out now."
Minseok nodded and smiled. "Okay. Just keep it down if you come back late. It's not fair to wake the kids or us poor old people up." His father left after the rest of the family and Jungkook buried the keys in his jeans pocket and turned the other way. He had one destination in mind. Seolhyun's bar.
-
Jungkook had to flash his ID to get into the place now it was late at night. He might had gotten away with it in the middle of the day, but he understood they wouldn't take chances now. He wasn't delusional anyway. He believed he could maybe pull off looking twenty with his build, but he definitely still had a young face. The bar wasn't as busy as it could have been, but a lot of the tables were full and people were hanging around outside. It was still the best bar in town and it made sense it drew in a good crowd every night. But this time of year, the school holidays, the majority of the tourists visiting the town were families. Not many stayed over night, and those that did had young children. They weren't going to be going out drinking. If anything the parents have one or two at home. It was a better situation for Jungkook. He didn't have to deal with too much of a crowd and he could just enjoy it.
He took a seat the bar. The tables were better if you were out with other people, but when you were on your own sitting at the bar was much more ideal. He got out his card, flipping it over his fingers, as he waited for a bartender to notice him. Jungkook noticed a bartender first instead though. His hair caught his attention first. It was silver. Jungkook could barely take his eyes off it, and he realised maybe it was more grey, but in the lights of the bar it shone like silver. Jungkook couldn't help but watch him then. He was short and thin, but he commanded attention and had a presence beyond anyone else around him. He carried himself with a confidence that Jungkook couldn't help but admire and envy. There was something fascinating about his hands and Jungkook's eyes were drawn down to them consistently. They were strong and skilled, amazing in the way they pulled pints, mixed cocktails, counted change. He was just doing his job, so why was Jungkook being a freak and getting half turned on by it?
There were two other bartenders working behind the bar, but it was just Jungkook's luck that it was the one he noticed that eventually came over to him. "What are you having?"
The bartender was even more striking up close. Most of his features were soft and pretty, though his eyes were sharp and enticing. Jungkook had to swallow hard and take a deep breath to keep how flustered he was under control. "Single whiskey and coke, please?"
"I have Jack Daniels or Bells on the lower shelf." The bartender pointed to the two bottles behind him. It was probably a skill of the job to be able to read people. The bartender had read that Jungkook was looking for the cheaper drinks.
"Surprise me." Jungkook shrugged. He hadn't drank enough of either to have a preference. Did it make him seem so young because he didn't have a preference? Jungkook didn't want to seem young to this bartender, he wanted to seem old enough. Enough for what, Jungkook was still trying to make sense of.
"Spicy." The bartender said with an amused chuckle and a raised eyebrow. Jungkook felt his cheeks heat up in response and ducked his head until a glass was placed in front of him. Jungkook got over himself to look back at the bartender as he thanked him.
Jungkook lost track of time as he sat there, drinking and watching. He had only intended to have a drink or two and then head back to the house, but one or two turned into five, and Jungkook ordering a sixth. As the night drew on, the bar got quieter, and every time the bartender served Jungkook, he stayed for longer and longer to chat. Jungkook got to know him, got to know his interest in music as they commented on the song playing and the albums on the walls, his taste in drinks as Jungkook did get called out for not being that experienced enough to have a preference yet, his thoughts on the sea and freedom as the alcohol loosened Jungkook's tongue to share some of his thoughts about the beach and where they were.
Jungkook's parents had always been liberal and open with their thoughts on alcohol. Jungkook had been allowed to try alcohol from a young age, been allowed to have a few drinks when he was teenager and safe in the house. It had given Jungkook a more mature opinion on alcohol, and when he turned eighteen he wasn't going out and getting hammered every night and getting himself in trouble and danger. It had also given him a little more tolerance than a lot of people his age. Even with that though, Jungkook knew he was pushing it with six drinks. His brain was light and fuzzy, but his body and limbs heavy. He would have one more, and then head back home.
He was drunk enough that it was harder to keep his interest, his fascination, his...attraction, to this bartender under control. It was harder to not be obvious in the way he watched, the way he reacted to actions and the words. It was a little crazy how quick things were developing. He didn't even know the guy's name for God's sake. It was a little awkward, especially when he had shared his name with the bartender already so he could use it but Jungkook couldn't refer to him as anything other than the bartender. He wasn't wearing a name tag so Jungkook couldn't read it from there. All he could do is ask, and that was a little scary. Why, Jungkook didn't know, but he had to get over it if he wanted to learn the information.
His sixth whiskey and coke was placed down in front of him, and the bartender leant against bar separating them as he had done every other time before other customers needed attention. This was his chance. "You're not wearing a name tag."
Jungkook's cheeks flushed again and he curled his hands around his glass tightly to resist lifting them up to cover his face. God he was such a mess. All he wanted to do was ask his name, why did he have to say that instead. The bartender didn't seem to find the comment as weird and embarrassing as Jungkook did though. He looked down at his own chest as though to confirm there wasn't a name tag there and then looked back up with a shrug. "No, we don't actually have to here. Some patrons can be arseholes and I'd rather most of them not know my name. Especially not with social media and how many decide to try add me and get in contact after."
"Oh yeah, that must suck." Jungkook said softly. He took a drink and kept his gaze fixed on the glass after, spinning it slowly in his hands. He could read the inference even in his drunken state. The bartender didn't want people - Jungkook - knowing his name.
"Hey," Suddenly there were gentle fingertips under his chin lifting his face up. Jungkook was forced to meet the bartender's gaze. He didn't mind though. Those sharp eyes were so breath taking and Jungkook did not mind being closer to the man than he had been all night. "My name is Yoongi."
Oh. OH! Jungkook wasn't an arsehole, or just some everyday patron. The bartender - Yoongi - didn't mind Jungkook knowing his name. Jungkook beamed. He felt special and touched. The fingers stayed on his face, the hand moving and instead stroking up cheek, thumb coming up to rest at the corner of his mouth. There was charged energy between the two of them. Jungkook knew he wasn't making it up. He could feel it in that touch. See it in those eyes.
"Yoongi-"
The warmth of Yoongi's hands disappeared and Jungkook's cheek was hit with cool air. "Finish your drink, Jungkook. You're drunk, you should go home and go to bed soon." Yoongi pushed Jungkook's hands and glass closer to his body.
Wait. What? Jungkook had read it. He was so sure he had read it properly. He hadn't been projecting or grasping at straws. He was so sure there was an interest there on Yoongi's side as well. But he had just been completely rejected. That didn't feel good.
Yoongi was called over by a colleague, and he turned. "Oh, I haven't paid for this one." Jungkook called out quickly. He did not want to prolong this interaction anymore really after that rejection. All Jungkook wanted was the ground to swallow him whole and then maybe spit him out into a volcano. But his conscience wouldn't let him get away with a drink he hadn't paid for.
Turning back around, Yoongi smiled softly. "It's okay. I got this one for you. Maybe you can pay me back sometime."
Jungkook watched him go, biting his lip as he processed it all. Yoongi was nice. He probably felt sorry for Jungkook even though Jungkook had definitely put him in an uncomfortable position. This awkward, childish eighteen year old who should be an adult now, who professed to be an adult, but was definitely still a fucking child. He felt stupid. He shouted and yelled about being an adult, but all he did was throw tantrums and cause fusses and make people uncomfortable. No wonder his family didn't know what to do with him. No wonder Yoongi rejected him.
He downed the rest of his drink in one. No point wasting it, especially if someone else was paying for it, and then pushed himself off the bar stool. He left the bar in a hurry, not wanting to spend any more time there with how he was feeling. Over the music he thought he heard his name being called. He ignored it. Only Yoongi knew his name and he wouldn't be calling out after him surely. He was going to go back go to bed, and hopefully spend the rest of this trip pretending this night never happened.