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Why are you hiding from the sight?
There is no winner in this fight
They've been hauting all your life
There's no need running through the night
Stand up, wipe away your tears
You've been against the tide for years
Don't surrender to this fray
Walk Away - Elysion
He was just twenty when his life turned upside down.
You know, for many places he would be considered a minor yet, but Samuel Asher did not care. He was too focused in his college studies, and it was like that for all his life. It was not like he had no friends - but at same time no one of them knew him enough. He could not tell them the truth about him anyway, not without being seen as a crazy man.
Samuel was the gifted child; the one who learned too fast, who got bored in the classes and skipped years.
He would be the total pride for his parents, if wasn’t for a minor detail: the things he could see in the dark.
They have accompanied him in the shadows for longer he could remember. In a corner in his room, away in the gardens, welcoming him when his house was empty.
Samuel named them ‘Shadow People’ after some time - even when some of them did not resembled exactly human. They never talked to him, but they were always there: lurking, observing. For what? He had no idea.
Some of them seemed really care for him, and some were kinda aggressive, but never hurt him, at least not directly. He used to be scared of them as a child, and he went to psychiatric care too much for someone of his age too. He took a great amount of medication trying to stop to see the that ‘shadow people’. It never worked. In the end he learned to lie that he was seeing nothing, so people could accept him. It was better to make friends this way. And his parents stopped to look at him with pity. The meds were working, life goes on.
At least if that was the true.
Despite his name, his family was not a religious one; later he would wonder if going to some church would have helped him to stop to see these beings in the shadows but he never found it in time.
The first time Samuel got hands in a arcane magical book, he took it for a bullshit. There is no way that could be real, right? Angels, demons, powers from above or below.
But he found it indeed interesting. The sacramental laws, the logical in its own way. His mind too sharp for the most got taste in that kind of reading. There was some things in alchemical studies he could even relate to his chemistry studies at college.
If he noticed the shadow people got nearer to him after he started these studies, he pretended he didn’t.
Too much remedies to sleep without nightmares, too many visions when he was wake he could not get rid of.
And yet, the best for him was to pretend Samuel did not care about it at all.
Because in the end of the day, who would believe in him if he told them? He learned from his childhood that there is no point but to ignore it.
If nobody believed in a little boy telling there was something near his bed when he was trying to sleep, why should someone believe him now, adult and heavily medicated?
Life went it’s normal course for months after he started his studies in the occult. Nothing had changed in his opinion.
Samuel looked at the circle, unsure about he was about to do.
He had read all the instructions more than once but it was hard to ignore the uneasiness in his chest. As if he lacked something.
He started the words, unsure, his surprise when he saw a form in the circle.
The man smiled at him, amber eyes and androgynous appearance. Scorpions in the man’s clothes, but he seemed did not care. “Missed me, hm?” The entity smiled, amused.
Too surprised that his spell indeed work, Samuel’s hand let down the cup he was holding, the wine spilling down and breaking the sigil.
Samuel looked at it by the same time the demon did, a shiver running through this spine.
The demon took a step in his direction, Samuel holding his own breath while it approached.
He felt the long fingers in his face, while the amber eyes analyzed him “But I must confess, as wonderful as I am, I have missed you too”.
For more alluring his touch were, it did not prevented the fear inside the young man chest.
The demon laughed with Samuel intrigued expression, and licked his lips “I see that there is a lot of things you don’t know yet, darling. Should I be in the shadows a little more?”.
With a melodious laughter, Samuel was left alone again in the room, his heartbeat aching in his chest while the young man sat in the floor, his breath heavy with the adrenaline, while he looked the circle with anxiety.
What the hell did he had done?
It was near the thanksgiving day. The guys had invited Samuel for a party in the outskirts before they all left home.
Even being not the most sympathetic person he knew, it was kinda easy for him to make friends. Someone who needed help with the projects and exams, and then suddenly he was in the middle of a group of classmates going to parties and laughing about amenities.
There was nothing different that night. Some drinks, a girl who wanted something else than just a conversation, the usual.
“Hey, snow head, we are going” one of Samuel colleagues called him. They were referring to his almost white hair, as usual. He nodded in agreement.
Samuel smiled to the brunette girl he was kissing a while ago. She was a little drunk, but so as he, then they were a littler more bolder than the usual.
But his plans would have to wait to another opportunity.
“I’m going with you, wait”.
He kissed the girl a last time.
Listen. Stay with the girl. Do not enter this car.
The voice in his mind came, too similar to the demon’s one.
But why would he worried about him? It was more like a trap, right?
Do.not.enter.this.car.Samuel.
The young man ignored that voice. More like it was the alcohol making an effect in his organism.
Beside that, he would travel back home in the next day, and his dorm was a complete mess. Better get home soon to solve it.
The pain was overwhelming. Samuel tried to open his eyes but his vision were covered in blood and he closed his eyes again. If he was dying, he did not want to see. It was too fast, a light in the wrong direction and the car went down the cliff. He never had time to process it before the hit.
His lungs were burning every time the air went in, like they were pierced. Maybe did they? It’s harder and harder to breathe.
He had the impression of long fingers holding his head. He heard someone curse and after the same voice in a scolding tone “I told you to not enter this car, why did you ignore me? Come on now, breath, let me help you”.
The voice from before? The demon’s one? Why it seemed worried about him?
“I’ll take care of him, you don’t need to worry”. Another voice, more deep and somewhat powerful.
He heard the demon gave a dry laugh before reply. “Always bossy, Michael darling. Don’t you dare let him die yet. He is mine ”.
“I’m afraid was it the opposite by the pact between you both, right? Let him to us. It’s not your decision if he will die or not”.
“Oh, but there is a few things I can and I’ll do to interfere if I need to”.
A frustrated sigh “He will not die. At least not if you let us take the situation from now, are you satisfied?”.
“Much better, darling. Give him back to me in one piece, right?”.
One moment of absolute silence.
A new sigh. A warm hand in his forehead. A feeling of peace brought in that touch.
“Of all them, should you really be closer to him?” someone was caring his hair, the same warm feeling taking over his chest, turning his breath easy again “Well, it doesn’t matter. You still have a mission to do, my poor boy. I can’t let you rest now”.
But the comfort in that touch brought him a deep sleep.
Samuel opened his eyes. The pain for breathing was still there, but a lot easier now.
His mind wandered to what happened. Was the accident real? And what about the strange discussion he listened? It only could be because of the concussion, right? There was no way something like that would happen for real.
“Oh, hi Mr. Asher. I see that you are awake now” a nurse greeted him “I will tell the doctor you’re reacting. You let all of us really worried, you know”.
The doctor examined him, put a light on his pupils, stared to ask what he remembered.
Samuel answered all, except by the part he listened strange voices soon after the incident. It was not like someone would believe him, anyway, but it was better to keep it as his secret.
When he could think enough about what happened, Samuel asked about his classmates.
He saw the interval between his question and the looks the profissionais shared before answer, and a sour taste come to his mouth at the same moment.
“We are sorry, mister. You are the only survivor”.
Samuel did not say a word in the days that followed, even when his parents went to visit him. His mind kept coming back and forth through what happened that night.
He sighed, his hand on his face again, trying to understand the meaning of that. Why should he be the only one to live? He was not that special. If he had to choose between himself or them, he would rather him to be the one to die.
At same time the words that he heard for last before his conscience went black, saying he had a mission to accomplish. Who was the one who helped him? What he wanted to say for mission? And that demon saying he did belong to him?
When Samuel talked again, it was only to ask for a stronger medication to sleep.
His dreams weren’t better.
A myriad of old temples, candles, invocations. The demon he invoked that night kissing his lips passionately. An angel talking to him and giving him a gold ring. Old books. The smell of incense. Some woman he never seen before undressing for him. A beautiful palace. A kingdom in the middle of plains and sea, and a palace rich in gold and wisdom.
Samuel’s head ached more than his lungs when he woke that time. The fleeting feeling he had lost something important.
“Oh, you’re finally wake. I’m afraid you did not sleep very well, right? I mean, you seemed agitated”.
The nurse had a shooting voice and a sweet smile while verified his signs.
“Oh, just a bad dream” he murmured, breathing deep. The pain were easing.
Maybe he would go home soon?
Samuel did not feel prepared to come back to his normal world, whatever normal meant for him.
“Maybe it’s the medications side effects. You went for a traumatic experience, Mr. Asher, maybe you need more time to process what happened”.
“I don’t need more time. I need some answer”.
“Pardon me?”.
“Oh, I’m sorry. Just thinking out loud”.
She gave him a wary look, but continued to write in her sheet.
They not talked anymore, but before leaving the nurse put a ring on his bedside table.
“Oh, I was forgetting. The paramedics found this ring. They said you were using it by the time of the accident”.
“What ring? I did not....”
Samuel looked at the inscriptions forged in the gold metal. It was somehow familiar, but he could not remember from where. His hand took it almost immediately, playing with it.
“Or did I?” murmured he to himself, his eyes fixed in the inscriptions, trying to decipher what they meant.
The woman smiled “I will tell the ones who rescued you that your ring is with you again. They will be happy”.
“Oh, thanks, but” Samuel looked away from the ring to talk to the nurse again.
There was no one there.
The medical staff said it was a miracle he was able to left the hospital alive and without any side effect from the accident.
Samuel looked at the ring in his right hand. He knew it was a miracle indeed.
The dreams were clearer now, even if his memories while awake were still confused and his heart still felt broken for his friends.
While his rational mind kept scolding him inside and saying to stop to believe that reveries, he could feel in his bones how real they were.
God, maybe I went crazy for real now.
But he was, always, a scientist before any else. He could think of only one way to test the reality about his mind.
“Good to see they kept their promise ” the demon smiled inside the circle Samuel had summoned that night “ You’re in a better shape I thought you would”.
The young man smiled “I missed you too, Asmodeus”.
“I’m happy to have you back, Solomon ” the demon laid down his head lightly, in a curtsy, the smile in his red lips.
Samuel smiled to hear that old name. As if he was finally himself again after a long, long time.
“I’m much happier now you recognize your old best friend... and best lover”.
“And guardian angel too? I’m sorry for had ignored you that day”.
“I would prefer guardian demon. You have Michael in the other side, anyway”.
The young mage kept his smile while Asmodeus pouted. In fact, in the Solomon’s heart it was like meeting again an old friend.
He was their master again. But more than that: he owned control of his magic again, the ring helping him to channel his powers.
For just a moment, he was not afraid of anything. Nor the shades whose he could identify now; nor his mysterious fate the angel have talked about. He was Solomon, the one wise king, after all.
The things would be okay, slowly. He was whole again. For the first time in his life as Samuel, all seemed to be in its place.