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Your name is Horuma Akemi and you're tired of watching people die.
You watched your mum die, slowly, of cancer. Then you watched your dad die. It was the drinking that got him in the end, and now you have to watch her die. Everyday.
You take a deep breath and step through the door.
The harsh chemical smell of hospitals hits you and you flinch as everything it reminds you of flashes before your eyes.
You wrinkle your nose.
"It smells awful doesn't it?" she smiles over at you.
"Madoka!" you gasp, running over to her bed and scooping her up in your arms.
You pull away slightly, when she doesn't hug you back.
"I'm sorry, do I know you?" she asks, knitting her brow as she tries to remember your face.
You let her go and stand back, you thought she remembered. Just for a second.
"Probably not" you say, sadly "Do I look familiar?"
"Maybe a little, but I can't place you" she says, shaking her head.
"We used to be friends" you say "Good friends"
"We did?" she tilts her head to one side "Were we very young?"
"No, it was quite recently"
"That's odd..." she puzzles "I'm usually so good at placing faces"
"Madoka" you say, suddenly leaning forward "are you sure you don't remember me?"
She stares at you for a moment.
"Look" you say pulling your phone out of your pocket and flicking through the pictures "This is us"
It wasn't a particularly special photo, Koyoko had taken it while you walked on the beach, it wasn't even a nice day, but it was the most recent one you had of her.
"Where was this?" she asks looking confused.
"The beach" you explain "in Miami"
"What do you mean? I've never even been to Miami"
"You have though, look" you say pointing to the photo "I'm sure you can remember; you recognised me"
"I don't even know your name!" she says, glaring at you and starting to panic.
"You do! You just have to remember" you say "Please remember"
"Remember what?" she says, taking a shaky breath "What are you talking about?"
"The trip to Miami, why you're in hospital, me - even yesterday would be a start"
"What happened yesterday?" she asks.
"Pretty much exactly what's happened today" you say trying to calm down "and every other day for the last year and a half"
"What happened a year and a half ago?"
"We went to Miami"
"I told you" she frowns "I've never been to Miami"
"But you have - we have - it rained the whole time and soaked our ice cream cones"
"I - what happened - why am I in hospital?"
"You had, um, an accident"
"What? What kind of accident?"
"It was on this day" you say pointing at the photo again "It was raining and we'd had a stupid fight, I went to stay with Kyoko, and I don't really think you knew what you were doing, but you took some pills, Madoka"
"Pills?"
"Yeah, and you drank. A lot." the image of her convulsing next to the sofa, wine glass in hand, flashes into your mind and you flinch.
"Why don't I remember?"
"You lost all of your short term memory, you probably won't remember this tomorrow"
"What?" her face whitens "Has that happened before?"
"Hundreds of times" you take a deep breath "But, I think you could remember"
"You do?" she asks "How?"
"I've read up about it and you just have to try" you explain "it's like a wall you have to break through, people have done it before"
"Okay, I'll try" she says and you proceed to tell her everything that happened in the year and a half since her accident.
Until Sayaka, a girl who used to be your friend, comes to visit Madoka, when she sees you, she kicks off, they all blame you - her friends, her family.
Sayaka kicks you out; she tells the nurse not to let you in again, but she's done that before, you'll get back in tomorrow.
And you do, blagging your way past the nurse's station.
The chemical smell hits you again.
You step through the door, scrunching up your nose.
"It smells awful in here doesn't it?" she laughs from her bed.
"Madoka?" you ask, trying to stop yourself hoping.
"Do I know you?" she asks, smiling over at you.
"No you don't" you say, blankly "I'm sorry"