Chapter Text
Guillermo hadn't meant to eavesdrop, but well…
Nadja does this thing where she thinks she's whispering low enough that Guillermo won't be able to hear her, but in reality she's practically just shouting in a whispery voice. She's really underestimating human hearing.
"Nandor is doing that thing again!" Nadja whisper-shouts to Laszlo.
"What thing?"
"You know what thing!" She sounds irritated. "I called him a little pig shit and instead of getting all pissy like usual he started all this weeping and whining! Now he's locked himself in his room while he cries like a pathetic little baby!" She huffs as she sits beside Laszlo, crossing her arms petulantly. "He is so frustrating when he does this!"
"And also the rest of the time." Laszlo adds.
"Yes, that too."
Guillermo decides he doesn't need to hear the rest of the conversation. A plethora of questions rush through his head, none of which he can ask since he wasn't meant to hear any of that anyway. Besides, he’s already rushing to Nandor’s crypt to check on him himself.
Guillermo knocks on Nandor’s door, waiting patiently for a response.
“Go away!” Nandor shouts. His voice sounds off.
“It’s me, Master. Can I come in?”
There’s no response, but Guillermo hears the small click of the door being unlocked, so he steps in.
Nandor is curled up on the chaise, his cape pulled tightly around him. And, as Nadja had said, he’s definitely crying.
“Are you okay Master?”
"I am not crying!" Nandor insists defensively, despite that not being what Guillermo had asked.
"Okay..." Guillermo says, not convinced as more tears stream down Nandor's face.
"I am not crying! Because… Because I am a very big boy and I do not cry!" He says, scrubbing at his face. "And I- I-" Whatever Nandor had been planning to say, likely more of him insisting that he is not crying, is instead replaced with a small whimper, immediately followed by sobbing.
Oh. Oh no, he's really upset.
"Hey," Guillermo attempts to be comforting, despite panicking slightly at this whole situation. "It's okay. Are you… Are you upset because Nadja said something mean to you?"
"I-I am n-not upset!" Nandor manages through hiccuping sobs. "B-But… She is very mean to me!"
"I'm sure she didn't mean to hurt your feelings."
"My feelings are not hurt! I am a big boy and I do not get hurt feelings!"
Right. This is… A lot. Frankly, Nandor insisting he's a big boy isn't even close to the strangest thing he's done before, but paired with his other behaviors right now it's certainly… Interesting. That's the best word Guillermo can apply to it.
"Well, I'm sure she didn't mean to be mean to you."
"Yes she did! She is always mean to me! She's a big meanie!"
“Okay.” Guillermo takes a deep breath. “Maybe we should just get you to bed, okay? I’m sure you’ll feel better tomorrow.”
“I feel fine!” Nandor says with a pout. “But… I am sleepy…”
Getting Nandor ready for bed is surprisingly easy tonight. He lets Guillermo do his job with very little extra complaining, mostly filling the silence with little sniffles. Once Guillermo helps him into his coffin, he just stares up at him silently.
“Goodnight Master.” Guillermo says. Nandor looks very sad, frowning intensely as he looks up at Guillermo. His eyes look shinier than usual.
"I can't sleep…” Nandor says, despite not yet having the chance to even try. “I need Jesper."
"Jesper?" Guillermo tilts his head curiously.
"Yes! Jesper!" Nandor huffs petulantly, stomping out of his coffin and beginning to search for this Jesper. "Jesper!" He calls out, rifling through his closet. "Jesper?" He turns to Guillermo, frowning. "Guillermo, please help me find Jesper." He asks sadly.
Nandor saying please is such a rare occasion that Guillermo immediately knows this must be very important, so he nods and goes to ask the others what Jesper even is so he knows what he's looking for.
"Um, guys? Who's Jesper?" Guillermo asks, peeking into the fancy room.
"Jesper?" Laszlo asks confusedly, though not actually seeming that interested.
"Yeah, Nandor's asking for them."
Nadja groans. "Ough, this again!" She crosses her arms. "Every time he gets like this it's always Jesper said this, Jesper said that, Jesper thinks you are being very rude right now, Jesper would like it if you didn't fuck so loudly because it is making him uncomfortable! Ugh!"
"Okay but who is Jesper?" Guillermo asks, getting impatient at the lack of an actual answer.
"Jesper is this stupid little stuffed bear Nandor has. When he gets all weepy and pathetic he starts acting like it has feelings, which just makes him even more pathetic!"
Guillermo can't help the relief he feels at hearing that Jesper isn't a person. Admittedly, he had assumed not, since Nandor was searching in his closet, but still. It can be hard to tell with him sometimes.
"Well do you guys know where it is?"
"Why the bloody hell would we know?"
Great. That was about as helpful as he was expecting.
He returns to Nandor's crypt, only to find Nandor sitting on the floor in front of his closet, many articles of clothing and various items that had been stored there now strewn around him. He's sniffling very loudly.
"Um, Nadja and Laszlo don't know where Jesper is but we can keep looking around and maybe we'll-"
Guillermo is interrupted as Nandor begins to sob loudly. "I-I want Jesper!"
“Okay, shh, shhh.” Guillermo attempts to soothe. “How about you keep looking for Jesper in here, and I’ll go look somewhere else okay?”
Sniffling, Nandor nods, so Guillermo leaves to set out on his own quest. Truth be told, he doesn’t plan on looking for Jesper. He would, but finding anything in that house is damn near impossible, so he has another idea that he hopes will be faster.
He quickly makes his way to the closest store he can find that he thinks might have stuffed animals. It won’t be the same as Jesper, but maybe so long as he has some sort of stuffed animal, Nandor will go to sleep and Guillermo can find Jesper some other time.
Guillermo spots a little grey and white plush horse on one of the shelves lined with small plush toys and instantly knows that if Nandor doesn’t like that, he won’t like anything else here. He picks it out, pays for it, and speeds home as fast as he can lest Nandor begins crying again before he can get back.
"Did you find my Jesper?" Nandor asks as soon as Guillermo returns, still sniffling.
"No, but I found this." Guillermo presents the little plush horse to Nandor. Admittedly, he's nervous. Nandor clearly really wants Jesper, but he's hoping that this will do.
Nandor stares at it, wide-eyed. "Horsey?"
"Yeah, I got you a horsey."
Nandor slowly takes the plush, examining it closely before clutching it to his chest.
And then he cries.
"Oh- Oh no, I'm sorry, I know you wanted Jesper but I thought maybe you'd like this one instead and-"
"H-He looks like J-Jo-ohn!" Nandor chokes out.
Oh. Oh no, Guillermo really didn't think this through. He takes a deep breath, grounding himself. It's fine, he can handle this.
"It's okay, just relax, you're alright-"
"Th-thank you…" Nandor says, still crying but attempting to scrub away his tears. "For this s-smaller John."
"Oh. You're welcome Master." Perhaps with everything that has happened with Nandor tonight, being thanked by him should not be so close to being the strangest, but Guillermo can’t deny it catches him off guard. “Let’s just get you to bed, okay?”
Nandor looks down at his new horse plush, avoiding Guillermo's eyes. "John II would like a hug before night nights…" He says shyly. Guillermo smiles, taking the little horse and giving it a gentle hug before returning it to Nandor. Nandor clutches the horse closely, looking a bit sad.
Guillermo is confused at first, before reminding himself that Nandor has likely never been straightforward a day in his life. Sometimes it's best to play along with him. "Is there anyone else who wants a hug before night nights?"
"Maybe…"
"Would this person happen to be named Nandor?"
"Possibly…"
Guillermo smiles, because Nandor is just… Very, very cute. Silly, but cute. He wraps his arms around Nandor, reveling just a bit at how he doesn't get pushed away for once. And Nandor hugs him back, which frankly feels a bit unreal. Nandor nuzzles against Guillermo's hair, which is too adorable to be real. Surely Guillermo is just having a very strange dream.
Nandor pulls away, staring down at John II, then looking over at his coffin with a frown, before back down at John II.
“John II does not want to sleep in there.”
Guillermo plays along. “Why not?”
“He is feeling…Small and frightened right now. He doesn’t want to be in there…”
“But he’s got a big, strong warrior to keep him safe.”
Nandor tilts his head down further, as if trying to hide. “But what if that big strong warrior is also feeling small and frightened?”
“Well… Then I guess I’ll just have to keep him safe until he’s feeling strong again.” Guillermo says gently.
“I am the warrior that is feeling small and frightened…” Nandor clarifies quietly, still looking down.
“I know, Master.” Guillermo places a gentle hand on Nandor’s back, guiding him out of the crypt. “Would you like to sleep in the blue room?”
“Yes please…”
How polite of him. And therefore, how strange. Guillermo opts not to dwell on it and retrieves Nandor’s extra bag of soil before guiding him to the blue room.
Once in the blue room, Guillermo slides the bag of soil under the stiff and dusty pillow. Hopefully Nandor won’t mind, but Guillermo sincerely can’t remember the last time he cleaned this room, leaving the pillows and sheets dusty and smelling stale.
If Nandor is bothered, he doesn’t show it as he crawls into bed, getting under the sheets and clutching John II to his chest. Guillermo settles in a nearby chair that, despite the cloud of dust that erupts from it as he sits, is fairly comfortable. Perhaps not enough for him to be thrilled to be sleeping in it, but it could certainly be worse.
Nandor lays there, tossing and turning for about ten minutes before speaking up again.
“Guillermo?” He says quietly.
“Yeah?”
“John II is cold. He needs warm snugglies.”
Guillermo catches on quickly this time. “Oh, well, I guess if he needs to be warm then I could help. As long as a certain warrior is fine with also getting some cuddles, so that his noble steed can stay with him and be warm.” Guillermo speaks without putting much thought into the implications. So what if Nandor is asking, in an admittedly very roundabout way, for Guillermo to cuddle him? It’s fine. Nothing to think too deeply about at all.
“Am I that warrior?”
“Yes, you’re that warrior.”
“Then yes.”
Guillermo crawls into bed beside him, and to his surprise, Nandor almost instantly latches onto him, clinging to his side.
Nandor is asleep within minutes. Guillermo feels like he’s awake for hours.
Guillermo wakes up alone.
He glances around the room for any sign of Nandor, but he’s gone. He shoots out of bed, searching for him before finding him in the fancy room, reading something.
“There you are! Are you feeling better today Master?”
Nandor narrows his eyes at Guillermo, looking him over before looking away entirely. “I do not know what you are speaking of.” He says tensely, before going back to whatever he was reading. Well… It’s not a no, at least.
Or maybe last night really was just a very strange dream. A very nice, very cute, very strange dream.