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The way Tatsumi's hands clung onto his shoulders, surely squeezing them in pain, made Mayoi’s own heart ache.
Mayoi apologizes as usual, somehow thinking the other’s pain is his fault. “S-sorry Tatsumi-san! I must be shaking you around right? Sorry I’m so useless I can’t even walk smoothly!”
“Not at all. I can tell how carefully you’re trying to walk, and you’re doing a great job. Thank you for carrying me like this, again.” the man he’s currently carrying on his back reassures him.
Tatsumi’s leg pain had been acting up again during practice. Trying his best to be strong, he pretended it was fine - but Mayoi was able to tell he was greatly pained. Ever observant (especially when it came to Tatsumi), he could see the other idol had reached his limit.
So Tatsumi agreed to be carried back to the dorms so he could rest. They went to Mayoi’s dorm since Tomoya was gone and Tatsumi could relax in privacy without having to worry any roommate. And maybe Mayoi selfishly wanted to be alone together too…….
They get to the dorm room shortly, and he helps Tatsumi to the couch as gently as he can - proceeding to prop up his leg on some pillows. He noticed how clammy Tatsumi felt so he quickly flits away, returning with a damp towel.
Mayoi sits down facing him, holding up the towel, “May I…..u-um…..or no, you probably wanna do it yourself huh?! I’ll just-“
“Of course you may, go ahead.” he soothes with a smile. The same incredibly kind smile he always gives Mayoi that melts him to his core. Maybe he actually should let Tatsumi do it himself because touching such a holy face, even through the towel, might burn his sinful hand.
But he gives into his desires anyway - proceeding to push aside sweaty mint-colored bangs to gently wipe his face.
Tatsumi sighs happily at the sensation, closing his eyes. Mayoi is grateful for this, because he doesn’t think he could’ve survived any more eye contact. He can already feel his face heat up enough, without having to look into those beautiful purple eyes as he wipes his face.
Mayoi tries to savor every second of this, getting to gaze at his handsome unitmate’s face up close. He lingers longer than he probably should, hand basically caressing the other’s cheek through the towel. He thinks he’s gonna die when Tatsumi slightly nuzzles into his touch.
He can’t help but selfishly enjoy times like these. Of course he isn’t happy about the other being in pain, but having Tatsumi at the mercy of his care is well…...exciting to him. He can feel his blush deepening at the thought. This is one of the only times he’s able to get so close, to be able to touch another person like this. The only time a creature like himself could maybe be useful to the one he loves.
He’s so deep in thought he doesn’t even realize Tatsumi has opened his eyes.
“What are you thinking about Mayoi-san? You’re wearing such a beautiful smile.”
“Eeeek!” Mayoi jumps back startled. Tatsumi has caught him, smiling at him creepily no doubt. In panic he ends up blurting out his true thoughts.
“I-I’m sorry! I’m sorry for thinking such horrible things! But w-when you’re like this I get to spend time with you just the two of us…..and you can’t even run away from me because of your leg. Ah! I’m sorry I’msorryI’msorryI’msorry!! It’s such a wretched thing to think! Pleaseforgivemeeeee!”
Most people would be more than a bit off-put by some of the things Mayoi just said. But this doesn’t bother Tatsumi as he knows Mayoi well, and he’s easily able to see the other’s true intentions.
“You’ve committed no sins here, so no need to apologize. I would never run away from you though, Mayoi-san, injured or not. And I always love spending quality time with you. If you ever want to spend more time together please don’t ever hesitate to ask, it would be my pleasure.”
Tatsumi, even though he’s the one in pain, comforts him so warmly. Mayoi can’t help but think he must be doing it out of politeness. Just because they’re in the same unit and should get along. He’s someone so kind that he’s even nice to someone as despicable as him. Mayoi can’t dare to let himself hope for anymore than that.
In his self deprecation he almost forgot he was supposed to be taking care of Tatsumi right now, until he notices him wince in pain once again.
“D-does it hurt a lot? Would you like a painkiller?”
“That would be lovely, thank you.”
Mayoi runs off, returning with a glass of water and two pills.
Tatsumi gives him a grateful look as he takes them from him, “Thank you, Angel.”, and then he casually pops the pills into his mouth.
Mayoi squeaks at the sudden name. Thank god Tatsumi took the glass from his hands before saying that, or else he would’ve dropped it all over the floor.
Angel!??
He couldn’t be talking about him right? Mayoi looks around the room to check if there’s someone else he’s referring to, even if he’s positive they’re alone.
Tatsumi chuckles at the sight. “Fufu, yes. I’m talking about you, Mayoi-san. You’re the only angel here.”
“Aaaah, I-I don’t deserve to be called something like that! An evil creature like me whose heart is pitch blaaack! I only bring misery wherever I go, dragging everyone down to hell with meee! I-I’m no angel!”
“That couldn’t be more untrue. You really need to stop saying such nonsense about yourself. Such a benevolent and considerate individual, especially right now when you’re caring for me so kindly - someone like that is definitely an angel. I haven’t even had to ask for anything today, because you were able to sense everything I needed. You’re always looking out for me, and our kids too. You really are like a guardian angel watching over us all.”
“B-but!…….T-hat’s-”
Tatsumi cuts him off before he can try to deny it, “That’s the truth. I have God to thank everyday for putting you in my life. Thank you for all your help, you truly are kind.”
Mayoi is overwhelmed with the sudden compliments(especially such strong ones), but he can tell Tatsumi doesn’t wanna hear him say anything negative about himself right now. So he just keeps his eyes glued to the floor and tries to accept it.
“Y-you’re welcome…” he says quietly, face burning.
After he’s calmed down a little he dares to look back up, and is met with Tatsumi smiling at him fondly. Had he been staring at him like that the entire time Mayoi took to compose himself? He feels his blush grow hotter.
“H-how are you feeling? Is there anything else you need?” he stammers out to break the silence.
“The medicine is already kicking in nicely, so I’m feeling better in that regard. Though I must confess I am a bit tired…...Would it be alright if I rested on your bed?”
Mayoi blurts out an, “Of course!”, before he can let his mind dwell on Tatsumi sleeping in his bed and the implications of that.
He helps Tatsumi stand and then, slinging one of his arms over his shoulders, gently guides him over to the bed as well. He even tucks him in snugly under the covers after he’s laid down.
Before Mayoi can stand up to leave, a hand reaches out to gently grasp his wrist. If it was anyone else touching him suddenly like this, he probably would have flinched away immediately. But since it’s Tatsumi, it just feels nice and makes butterflies stir in his stomach. He looks down at the man in his bed questioningly.
A slight blush paints his cheeks, accenting the moles on his face cutely.
“I’m a bit cold…….Would you like to lie down with me?”
It takes a bit for that to sink in for Mayoi. At first he assumed he heard that wrong, or maybe that his twisted mind made it up. But no, he’s pretty positive Tatsumi asked him to do that. His head is absolutely reeling.
Of course he would like, even love to lay down in the bed with him. But would he be able to handle that without saying anything weird? Or even worse: blurting out an entire love confession.
“I-if t-that’s it then I’ll just go t-turn the heater up!!”
But Tatsumi is still gripping his wrist, not letting him go anywhere.
“It’s true that turning up the heater could warm me physically. But it won’t warm my soul the same way having you here with me would.” He gives his usually kind smile, though it seems a little bit more shy at the moment.
Mayoi can’t take it anymore, so he gives up. How can he say no to that ? It should be fine if he lays on the very edge of the bed and takes up the least amount of space as possible. This is how he rationalizes it as he gingerly slips under the covers, laying on the complete opposite end from the other. He’s practically falling off the bed by staying so close to the edge.
He hears Tatsumi let out a laugh.
“Mayoi-san? That looks terribly uncomfortable. And you can’t warm me very well from all the way over there, can you?” He extends out an arm towards him, beckoning him closer.
Mayoi once again really can’t say no to him, especially if this is something that will help him. So he slowly inches closer…..and closer….
Until he’s in reach of that arm Tatsumi’s holding out, and it promptly wraps around him and brings him close. It happens so swiftly, Mayoi’s body moves on its own and he cuddles himself right up against the other's side as if it was the most natural thing to do.
His brain shortly catches up however and he buries his face in Tatsumi’s chest and tries not to combust and turn to ashes. He’s sure Tatsumi must be feeling very warmed by him right now considering how Mayoi feels like he’s on fire.
Tatsumi’s arms are around him securely, holding him so close he can feel with his whole body when he lets out a sigh. When Tatsumi speaks he can feel the vibrations from where his head rests on his chest.
“I hope you can forgive me. I already feel like I’ve been spoiled with so much of your attention today, but I just can’t help myself from indulging more. Is this alright Mayoi-san? It’s not too much is it?”
He’s unable to form words at the moment so he just nods and shakes his head to answer, hand clenching Tatsumi shirt like it’s his lifeline to ground himself.
Resting on the other’s chest gives Mayoi perfect access to hearing Tatsumi’s heartbeat, which is loudly beating at a rapid pace against his ear.
“Aaaaah your heart is beating really fast!….I’m sorry! You must be afraid of being so close to someone so suspicious like meee!” He would try to jump away from the other if it weren’t for Tatsumi arms keeping him sungly in place.
Tatsumi lets out a chuckle, though it sounds like a nervous one. Just as Mayoi suspected, he’s probably scared…….
“Well…..it’s true that would be because of you Mayoi-san, but it’s not because I’m afraid. I could never be afraid of you. It’s rather the opposite actually, so please relax, okay?”
He smooths a hand down his back, and Mayoi realizes how tense his body has been this whole time. Tatsumi continues soothingly, rubbing his back in slow circles. He feels himself slowly relaxing, every gentle motion like a wave of bliss washing over him.
However the peace he’s begun to feel is quickly interrupted by Tatsumi saying his next piece.
“There we go~ that’s more relaxed……Although, your heart is beating quite fast as well…….. could it maybe be for the same reason as mine?”
Unfortunately, Mayoi tenses back up immediately.
“T-there’s no way it’s for the same reason!”
“Would you please look at me?” Tatsumi brings a hand up to cup his face, gently coaxing Mayoi to look up.
He looks right into those purple eyes, and his heart races like it’s about to run out of his chest.
“I already told you I am not afraid. So what other reason could it be? My dear Mayoi-san……I’m not sure what else I can do to make it more obvious…..except maybe this-“
And then pulls Mayoi’s face a little closer, and starts slowly leaning in. And Mayoi just lays there in shock, because there is no way this is actually happening right? He has to be mistaken. His perverse brain must be playing tricks on him.
There’s no way Tatsumi is about to kiss him.
But he does. Tatsumi brushes his lips against his so gently, so featherlight, as if he’s trying not to scare Mayoi away.
Tatsumi pulls back at him to look back at him with the sweetest smile, another rare blush on his face.
“I think you greatly underestimate my feelings for you. I love you Mayoi-san.”
Mayoi’s eyes go wide as he stares back at him in shock. Even though he heard what he said, even though Tatsumi just kissed him , he still doesn’t believe it.
There's no way……
“L-lo….L-ove?? W-what d-do, do y-you mean?” he can barely fumble out a coherent sentence.
“Love as in I hold romantic feelings for you. I’m in love with you. ” Tatsumi states as clearly as possible so there’s no way Mayoi can doubt his intentions.
He still thinks for a second that this is all some kind of trick on him, but he knows Tatsumi would never do something so mean. And as he looks into his eyes all he can see is adoration - it's clear he means what he says.
In a rush of euphoria, words begin gushing out, “I-I love you too Tatsumi-san!! I tried to hide it but whenever we’re together I can’t control my thoughts! I just d-didn’t want to scare you away since y-you’re my favorite person…..I- um, aaaaaah I-I’m saying weird things again aren’t I? I’m sorry!”
“No, I’m actually really happy to hear that. You’re my favorite person too.”
Mayoi doesn’t know where he got the bravery from, but this time he’s the one leaning in for a kiss - which Tatsumi happily returns. It’s a more solid kiss compared to the brushing of lips they just shared. As soon as they break apart they find themselves being pulled into another kiss. And another, and another, and another. Each kiss longer, deeper, and somehow sweeter than the last. Mayoi feels dizzy even though he’s laying down.
When they finally break apart to catch their breath, neither of them can stop smiling. Mayoi returns his head to it’s spot on the other’s chest; then promptly feels a kiss pressed to the top of his head. He can hear that Tatsumi’s heart is still beating fast, but this time the sound is comforting rather than nerve wracking.
They lay there a bit in silence, both processing what just happened. For once Mayoi’s thoughts don’t spiral downwards. He just revels in the feeling of Tatsumi’s hands on his waist, and the rise and fall of his chest as he breathes.
Of course he can only keep his anxiety at bay for so long, and suddenly remembers his partner’s injury. “T-tatsumi-san, how’s your leg? I’m not hurting you by laying on you like this, am I?”
“Not at all, you’re always careful not to hurt me.” Which is true, at least Mayoi had enough mind to completely avoid his bad leg when he cuddled up to him. “And my leg feels much better, thank you. Although, there’s so much happy adrenaline coursing through my body right now I can’t feel a thing. Fufu, it’s like you cured me Mayoi-san, it’s a miracle. See? You really are like an angel healing me.”
Mayoi looks up at him in protest, “N-no! I-I didn’t do anything to--”
But Tatsumi hushes him quickly with another kiss, and suddenly Mayoi can’t even remember what he was going to say. All he can think about is the feeling of Tatsumi’s smile against his lips.
Shortly after they fall asleep together, warm in each other’s arms. Before he drifts off to sleep, Mayoi makes a silent promise. If Tatsumi wants him to be his guardian angel, however unqualified he feels he may be, he’ll make sure he’s always here to watch over him.