Chapter Text
“Hell the fuck no.”
“Come on, Fez,” Rue begged. “Please. It’s only four days!”
It was ‘only four days’ of Fezco pretending to be Rue’s boyfriend in front of all of her family and friends. Rue had conveniently forgotten to mention that part.
“Bruh, you even hear yourself? You sound fuckin’ crazy.”
Rue glared at him. “Fuck you. I’m not crazy, I’m just sick of people asking me when I’m gonna bring a fuckin’ guy around.”
He took a drag from his joint. There wasn’t a shot in hell this plan would ever fool anyone. Fez thought of Rue as a sister, and Rue wasn’t even into men. There was no fucking way they could pull it off. Fez was a pretty poor actor to begin with, and being forced to play the part of Rue’s boyfriend was an even bigger task.
“Then tell them you like girls.” She shot daggers at him, and he raised his hands defensively. “Look, I ain’t tryna pressure you or nothin’. I’m just sayin’— Ion’ know your friends and fam’ back home, but it’s the twenty-first fuckin’ century. You think they’d actually care?”
She sighed, taking the joint from him. “I don’t know. I have no fuckin’ clue how they’d react. I just know that I’m not ready to tell them.”
When she leveled Fez with the saddest look he’d ever seen in his entire life, he knew he was done for. Since the day they had met— in fucking English 101 freshman year— he and Rue had been inseparable. He had never met someone that was so similar to himself. Rue could be absolutely ridiculous and utterly insane at times, but she understood loyalty, and that understanding went a long way with Fez. She had his back, and, when it all came down to it, he had hers in return.
That was how family worked.
He supposed the whole thing couldn’t be that bad. After all, Rue had mentioned that it was a destination wedding. At the very least, he could enjoy a vacation while helping out a friend. Yeah, he’d have to interact with far too many people than he was comfortable with, but if it was what Rue needed from him…
He let out a breath of exasperation. “When’s the fuckin’ wedding?”
DAY ONE
And that was how Fezco found himself on a direct flight to Florida two weeks later.
When he’d finally caved, Rue had let out a squeal of excitement that he was pretty sure she’d kill him over if it was ever mentioned again to her face. She had thrown her arms around him in an awkward hug to which he patted her back even more awkwardly in response. Neither of them were particularly touchy people, and hugs were definitely not a part of their repertoire. The unusual show of affection made him feel like maybe he had made the right decision after all.
Not that he was any less begrudging about the whole thing.
“Rue, getcho fuckin’ shit off my seat,” he griped, tossing a jacket back onto her lap.
She had packed way too fucking much for a four-day trip and was forced to take some clothing items out of her checked bag. This, of course, meant that she had to haphazardly throw said clothing items on herself in order to get them on the plane, and now that they were decisively midair, she was able to start stripping her aggressive number of layers off— right on to Fez. He was piled under at least five sweatshirts and jackets, the necessity of which was completely unjustified given the eighty degree weather forecast of their destination.
“My bad,” Rue said, carelessly dumping some of the clothes to the floor. “Okay, so it looks like when we get there, we just need to check into our suite, and then we’ll have like an hour before the brunch and cocktail hour,” she noted, reading through a ridiculously detailed schedule that covered the next four days of wedding festivities. “Then in the evening, there’s a dinner party.”
“That don’t sound too bad.”
Rue let out an evil laugh. “That’s just Day One. The next day is a free day until the Starlight Ball, and Day Three is the Tea Social and then the dress rehearsal, which doesn’t concern us, but we are invited to the rehearsal dinner.”
Starlight Ball? Fucking Tea Social?
“Jesus, fuck,” Fez muttered. “Is there even a wedding on the fuckin’ agenda?”
She smirked. “That’s Day Four.”
“This sounds like a whole bunch’a rich white people bullshit.”
“Fez,” she said flatly. “You’re white.”
He scowled at her. “I said rich white people. Big fuckin’ difference.”
Rue rolled her eyes and pulled her tray table down to flatten out the schedule on the surface. Her finger moved across the text line-by-line as she read it intently.
“I feel like we can do this. We only have to fake it during the actual events. There’s like… what?” Her finger tapped a few spots on the paper as she presumably counted. “Six events? We can handle that.”
He nodded his agreement. It honestly didn’t sound that bad. There was almost an entire day where they wouldn’t have to interact with anyone. Plus, he couldn’t complain about the prospect of copious amounts of free food and alcohol.
Rue slammed her tray table shut and turned in her seat to face Fez, positioning her back to lean against the plane wall, which blocked the light from the window. Fez grumbled as her bony knees dug into him. They didn’t exactly purchase plane tickets from the most luxurious airline. In fact, they had purchased the absolute cheapest tickets they could possibly find, which meant that there was very little space to begin with, and that wasn’t taking Rue’s unconventional pose into account.
“Okay, we got two hours left before we land.” She rubbed her hands together in front of her face with a devilish grin. “It’s time for your training.”
“Training?” He shot her a look. “The fuck?”
“Yeah, we need to go over like… How you’re s’posed to act.”
His eyebrows furrowed. “Whatchu mean by that?”
“I mean we need people to think we’re together. We can’t act like we normally do around each other. No one would buy it.”
Fez was starting to become nervous about the ideas Rue might have up her sleeve. He was fairly certain he’d have no problems verbally lying to people about being in a relationship with her, but having to physically convince people of that lie? He was a little less confident about his ability to do that.
“I ain’t gonna kiss you,” he proclaimed right off the bat.
Her face screwed up into an expression of disgust. “Ew. Fuck no. I meant like, holdin’ hands and shit.”
He felt immensely relieved by that. It was good to know that Rue found the idea just as off-putting as he had.
“Alright.” He smiled crookedly. “I can work with that.”
“And like… I don’t know, be a gentleman, too. So people are jealous of me.”
He glowered at her. “I am a fuckin’ gentleman.”
She grinned and patted him on the shoulder in what felt like a vaguely condescending gesture.
“Then you should have no problem.” She looked to the ceiling, apparently racking her brain for more tips. “You should put your arm around me when we’re walking. And like, talk about how nice and fun I am all the time.”
He huffed out a laugh at that. “C’mon now, Rue. We ain’t gotta go that far.”
A flight attendant stopped by their row to scold Rue for her unauthorized sitting position, which apparently violated safety guidelines. She shot her a look of abject resentment as she shifted back around, relieving Fez of the knee that he was pretty sure had been stabbing his kidney the entire time.
“Fuckin’ bitch,” she muttered as the attendant continued down the aisle.
Fez held back a laugh at that. He wasn’t sure which of the two of them would have a harder time maintaining their respective roles. If Rue was planning on pretending to be a sweet, conservative girl, he didn’t see it going over well.
He smirked. “Yeah, you real ‘nice and fun.’”
“Shut the fuck up.”
—
When they touched down a few hours later, everything went relatively smoothly. They checked into their hotel room just fine, though Fez was still having a hard time believing that the room was completely paid for by the groom’s parents, considering the fact that they were staying in an actual five-star resort. He had no clue how they could afford to cover every guest’s room for the duration of the four-day extravaganza that was Rue’s friend’s wedding, but he figured he shouldn’t look a gift horse in the mouth.
They changed into what Rue had described as, ‘casual formal wear,’ which made no fucking sense to Fez but resulted in him wearing a polo shirt and black jeans and Rue wearing a sundress with a funky print that somehow suited her, despite the fact that he had never seen her wear a dress before in his life.
They were on their way to the main pavilion, where most of the events would take place this weekend. As soon as Fez caught sight of it, he let out a low whistle.
“Damn.”
“Damn,” Rue repeated, just as impressed.
It was a massive structure placed right where the beach transitioned from sand to grass. It was covered by a white tent, but the sides were left mostly exposed to the open air so that the view of the ocean remained unobstructed. It was immaculately decorated, floral arrangements and twinkling lights covering every imaginable service. There was a bar at both the ends of the pavilion, and a dance floor right in the middle. People bustled about beneath the tent, making small talk and drinking mimosas as waiters carried around trays loaded with complimentary champagne flutes. If this was what the welcome brunch looked like, Fez could only wonder how elaborate the wedding was going to be.
Cocktail hour began at noon, but Rue had insisted that they wait to arrive until 12:30, as she was too anxious about seeing everyone to be one of the first ones there. Fez wasn’t sure how being one of the last ones there made her anxiety any better, but here they were nevertheless.
“Okay, you stay here. I’m gonna run to the bathroom.”
He turned to look at her in confusion. “You just fuckin’ went like five minutes ago.”
Her hands were fidgeting at her sides as her eyes fixed on the crowd of people beneath the tent— the family and friends she was so nervous about seeing.
“Well, I have to go again, Potty Policeman.”
He ignored that. “Rue, you gonna have to talk to these people eventually.”
“Yes. After I pee.”
She began to walk away, back toward the hotel lobby, but Fez stopped her, grabbing her wrist.
“Don’t fuckin’ leave me here all by myself,” he whispered in annoyance. “What am I s’posed to do?”
She glared at him. “I’m just taking a piss, Fez. It’ll be two fucking minutes, max. Don’t be a bitch.”
He scowled at her retreating form, wondering for the hundredth time that day why he had decided to do this. He was debating if he should just follow her to the lobby or stand there like a complete idiot when he noticed a figure at the corner of the pavilion struggling to straighten out a decoration that was fixed to the outside of the tent. When he noticed that the makeshift stool she was standing on was anything but stable, he started toward her, just in case.
He was a good twenty feet away when the stool began to wobble, spurring him into a mad dash to get to her before it was too late. He could see her attempting to grapple at the hood of the tent to no avail, hands slipping off the fabric as she began to fall backwards toward the hard ground.
Luckily, Fez got there just in time, arms reaching out to catch her like she was a damsel in distress and he was an everyday hero. He caught her in a bridal-carry, which felt fitting, given the circumstances of the weekend, and when he saw her face, he froze.
She was staring up at him with her eyes wide and her lips parted in shock. Her breaths came out in heavy pants, still recovering from the fear of falling that fortunately never became a reality. And then, of course, there was the fact that she was pretty. Like, almost alarmingly pretty. Fez was rendered speechless, resigned to just stand there and hold her as they stared at each other, the defunct stool lying on its side next to them.
The girl, for her part, seemed equally as surprised, though Fez supposed that had more to do with the fact that a random stranger had just prevented a likely head injury and less to do with the fact that she found Fez attractive. The balmy air surrounded them, palm trees swaying lazily in the breeze. She blinked a few times, and her arms adjusted around his shoulders, but she made no move to be put down, which was totally fine with Fez. He wouldn’t have minded looking at her for several more silent moments, but he figured he should probably say something before she thought he was a fucking weirdo.
“Umm,” he finally managed. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” she said, almost hazily. “Yeah, I’m good.”
Then, as if suddenly noticing that a random guy was cradling her in his arms, she scrambled out of his hold and to the ground, reaching out immediately to brush off Fez’s shirt like she had somehow dirtied it.
“Oh my God, I’m so sorry.” He stared at her, confused about why she had felt the need to apologize. She didn’t seem to notice his furrowed brow as she continued on her apologetic rampage. “I just like, crash landed on you with my full body weight. Sorry if I hurt you.”
She crossed her arms against her chest in what seemed to Fez like a move to hide her anxious hand movements.
“Nah, you good,” he reassured. He was almost offended that she thought she could injure him, considering the fact that she weighed all of five pounds. “Don’t worry ‘bout it.”
She smiled then, apparently relieved that he wasn’t annoyed with her. Her gaze turned to the stool, and she bent down to tilt it back to an upright position. Once the task was completed, her eyes landed back on him.
“Thank you. For like, you know, catching me,” she said, endearingly awkward about it.
“Nah, s’all good.” He gestured to the floral arrangement that was still askew where it had been haphazardly mounted against the tent canopy. “You like… need help with that?”
She looked flustered by the suggestion. “Oh, no. No, I couldn’t ask that of you. You already just spared me a concussion,” she said, huffing out a laugh.
Her gaze kept flitting back to the crooked decoration, and Fez could tell by her expression that she wouldn’t be able to leave it like that. He couldn’t in good conscience stand by and watch her attempt to straighten it again. Not on that wobbly-ass stool and definitely not with her apparent lack of balance.
“You didn’t ask,” he insisted. “I offered.”
She stared at him for a moment, debating what to say. “Uh…” She inspected the decoration again, then the stool as if debating whether giving it another try would be worth the risk. “I guess you can help? If you really want to. Like, just spotting me in case I fall again.”
He nodded immediately to quell her obvious insecurity, then moved closer to her as she placed the stool into position.
“I gotchu, girl.”
She blushed, a rosy color appearing high on her cheeks. “Okay. Thanks. I’m just—” She awkwardly scrambled back onto the stool, crouching on it like a frog in preparation to stand. “I’m just going to straighten it out really fast.”
She glanced at him like she was afraid she was imposing. He wasn’t sure how to soothe that anxiety, so he simply put his hands on her waist to support her and hoped that he hadn’t overstepped in doing so.
“Take yo’ time,” he reassured. “No rush.”
She reached up on her tiptoes to adjust the floral piece, and as the stool rocked beneath her even more chaotically than the first time around, Fez was thankful he was ready to catch her if need be.
A few moments later, she had straightened things out and returned to the ground, Fez assisting her with the dismount by holding the majority of her body weight while her hands planted on his shoulders. His hands were still securely clutched to her waist when she looked back up, her smile hesitant and beautiful.
“Thank you.”
Fez nodded, completely enthralled by her. He was just about to ask for her name when an older woman appeared behind her looking rather stressed, her hair disheveled and eyes wild.
“There you are!” she said to the girl, looping her arm around hers. “You need to help me with your sister. She’s starting to get stressed, and I haven’t had nearly enough fucking wine to deal with it right now.”
The woman started dragging her away, and the girl could only turn over her shoulder to give Fez a fleeting, apologetic look before she was whisked away.
He was left thinking about kind, brown eyes and a shy smile as he made his way back to wait for Rue. When she finally emerged from the hotel and met back up with him, the humidity making her curls even springier than usual, he was quick to ask about the girl he had just fatefully encountered.
“Yo.” He nodded toward her stealthily. “Who the fuck is that?”
Rue followed his line of sight, eyes eventually landing on the subject of his attention.
“Oh, that’s Lexi, Cassie’s sister. She’s the Maid of Honor.”
The Maid of fucking Honor, of course she was. His eyes followed her as she expertly weaved her way through the crowd. Distantly, he noted that he rather liked the name Lexi. Found it nice.
“You two friends?”
Rue nodded. “Actually, she was my best friend growing up.”
The slightest hint of bronze tanned Lexi’s cheeks, and her hair was chopped just beneath her chin, accentuating her exquisite jawline. It fell in soft brunette waves to frame her delicate facial features perfectly. The warmth in her eyes when she smiled made him weak in the knees. The more he looked at her, the more obvious it became: She was fucking gorgeous.
But it was more than just her physical appearance that pulled Fez in. She also had this alluring, sunny quality about her, like being unhappy in her presence would be practically impossible. So far, he had seen her go out of her way to approach three separate wedding guests and profusely welcome them to the event. All three of them immediately brightened upon seeing her, smiles wide as she greeted them. When she turned in Fez and Rue’s direction to greet the latest elderly guest, finally facing them fully, Fez sucked in a breath. She looked like a fucking goddess in her mini-dress, the sun painting her skin golden as she cocked her head back to laugh at something the old lady had told her.
“Shit,” he mumbled.
Rue’s head pitched backwards as she leveled him with a confused and slightly disgusted look. “The fuck’s wrong with you?”
His hands fidgeted at his sides. Jesus, he was nervous.
“Lexi ‘bouta make me act up.”
“What?” She let out a startled laugh. If she thought he had been kidding, she realized her error almost immediately upon seeing the serious look on Fez’s face. “Oh my God, fucking Lexi?” she asked in disbelief. “Really?”
His eyebrows furrowed. “What?”
“She’s like… the complete opposite of you.”
“What’s that s’posed to mean?”
Rue grabbed a glass of champagne from the tray of a cocktail waitress as she passed by. “I mean, she’s a fuckin’ genius.”
He glared at her. “I’mma pretend you didn’t just say that.”
She took a sip of her champagne, waving him off in a dismissive gesture. “No, I mean she’s an actual genius. Like— she was valedictorian in high school. A real teacher’s pet type. She was president of the National Honor Society, Student Council, and NAND.”
“The fuck is NAND?“
She smirked at him. “It’s a club. No Alcohol No Drugs.”
Shit. Fez felt every chance he might have had with Lexi abruptly slip through his fingers like sand. Suddenly, he could taste the joint he’d smoked before they took off, as well as every ounce of whiskey he’d drunk in the past five years.
“Fuck.”
Rue had the audacity to laugh at the tragedy that was his life. Fez, however, didn’t think it was funny in the slightest.
“Relax. That was back in high school. I’m sure she at least drinks now. But the point is— she’s a goody fucking two shoes. Not exactly your type.”
Lexi was now hugging a blonde girl closely, both of them rocking back and forth, all emotional about it. He could only guess it was her soon-to-be-married sister. He figured that the bride was supposed to be the main attraction for the duration of the weekend— her hair and makeup appeared to have been done professionally, even for this pre-pre-fucking- pre wedding event. She looked good. Great, even, in her billowy white dress. But she was still nowhere near Lexi’s level. At least not in Fez’s eyes.
He turned back to Rue. “The fuck you know ‘bout my type?” She hadn’t been expecting that question. Her lips pouted out, stumped. “That’s what I thought.”
Since Rue and Fez had become friends freshman year, he had never had a girlfriend. For all she knew, Lexi could be exactly his type. Honestly, he wasn’t even sure he had one. If he had to guess at the moment, he’d go with smiley, smart, five-foot-four brunettes.
“Doesn’t matter anyways. Pretty sure she has a boyfriend.”
He cursed under his breath. “Don’t tell me that shit.”
“The Best Man, Nate Jacobs?” she asked, as if Fez had a single clue who any of these people were. “They’ve been in a whole will-they-won’t-they situation since high school.”
Of fucking course she was in some kind of relationship. Although it was entirely unsurprising, it still irked him. It was just Fez’s luck to miss his opportunity.
“So which is it?” She stared at him in confusion. “Will-they or fuckin’ won’t-they?” he asked impatiently.
She rolled her eyes. “Jesus, Fez. I don’t know. I haven’t seen her in years.” She grabbed his hand. “Let’s go talk to her and find out.”
He was quick to untangle their hands, drawing his own back as if the contact had burned him.
Rue scowled at him. “What the fuck?”
“We can’t go over there all hand-and-hand and shit,” he whispered, scandalized. “Lexi’s gon’ get the wrong idea. She’ll think we’re together.”
Her eyes narrowed. “Fez. That’s the entire fucking reason you’re here.”
Oh. Right. He had totally forgotten about that, his mind a bit preoccupied by the Maid of Honor. He scratched his head, wondering how the fuck he was going to get through this weekend if he had already forgotten his task within five minutes of showing up.
She groaned, pushing her hair out of her face. “Listen. You need to get your head in the damn game. Remember your training. You’re not here to fuck my childhood best friend.”
Fez knew that. He did. But in his defense, when he had agreed to come to this wedding, he didn’t have any idea that Lexi existed. Rue could have at least given him a fair warning.
“You’re here to help me. You’re my emotional support fake boyfriend.” He nodded sluggishly, not exactly excited about the designation. “Come on,” she said, taking his hand once again and dragging him toward Lexi.
The closer they got to her, the more his hands started to sweat. It didn’t help that Rue had an ironclad grip on the hand she was holding, probably afraid he would aggressively untangle it from hers again like he had before.
When they finally made it to Lexi, she was still engaging in agonizing small-talk with an elderly wedding guest, so Rue cleared her throat to make her presence known. She turned to her with a bright smile, practically beaming at her. God . Fez couldn’t peel his eyes away from her. The black dress she was wearing fit her form just right, hugging her curves in a way that somehow made her look both sexy and chic simultaneously.
“Rue!”
She wrapped her arms around her and pulled her in close, Rue’s hand detaching from Fez’s in the process. He quickly wiped both of his hands on his pant legs and prayed that Lexi didn’t notice him sweating at a freakish rate.
“Oh my God, it’s been so long.” She pulled back, still grinning at her. “How have you been?”
“Good,” Rue said casually. “I mean, school fuckin’ sucks, but otherwise it’s all good.”
Lexi nodded. “That’s great! I mean, besides school sucking. But then again, does anyone like school?”
Rue crossed her arms against her chest. “You like school, Howard.”
She shrugged dismissively. “Right, but I’m weird. Or at least that’s what people tell me.”
She laughed about it, but something in her expression told Fez she didn’t actually find it funny. His eyes couldn’t help but linger on her face, analyzing it for every microscopic movement to try to glean what exactly she was all about.
And then, as if she had sensed him studying her, her eyes scanned over to Fez. They widened, like she had just noticed him standing there. Fuck. She looked so good. He was not ready for this.
For a moment, neither of them said anything, both unsure of how to proceed. After about an eternity of silence, she finally snapped back into hostess mode, pasting on a perfectly-tailored smile.
“Hi,” she said cheerily, holding out a hand. “I didn’t get to introduce myself earlier. I’m Lexi. Lexi Howard.”
He took it, and he could have sworn he felt a fucking current run through him at the contact.
“Pleasure to meet you, Lexi Howard,” he managed to get out, despite his heart thumping a mile a minute in his chest. “Name’s Fezco.”
They stood there for a moment, just staring at each other while with their hands connected between them in what had to be the longest handshake known to man. They weren't even shaking them anymore at this point. Their hands were stationary in the space between them as they once again found themselves caught in a standstill of eye contact that probably should’ve been weird but somehow wasn’t.
Rue cleared her throat again, pulling Fez out of his Lexi-induced haze. He regretfully let go of her hand, stepping back to wrap his arm around Rue, internally cringing at the action. Lexi’s eyes darted between the two of them. The movement hadn’t gone unnoticed.
“Are you two…?” She moved her head from side to side in a gesture that somehow translated to ‘together.’
Fez didn’t have it in him to confirm that assumption, so he let Rue take the lead.
“Yeah,” she said readily. “We’ve been dating for five months now. Right, Fezzy?”
Fezzy?
His jaw clenched in annoyance. He was going to fucking kill her when they got back to their hotel room.
“Yeah,” he gritted out. “Happiest five months of my damn life.”
A strange expression crossed Lexi’s face at that, and for a moment, Fez wondered if they had already fucked up and blown their cover. She recovered quickly however, her face instantly transforming into the picture of perfect composure. When her lips curved upward this time, her smile seemed almost artificial.
“That’s amazing. I’m so glad to hear it.” She gestured to the multitude of tables stationed around the pavilion. “Well, you’re welcome to sit anywhere. Cassie and McKay are coming around to talk to everyone, but in the meantime, there’s an open bar. You can help yourselves.”
Rue started toward a table, and Fez couldn’t help but turn back to catch one last glance of Lexi over his shoulder. She was looking back at him, and Fez was probably just tripping, but he could have sworn that her features were set in something akin to disappointment.
—
The rest of the brunch had gone swimmingly, all things considered. Rue had introduced Fez to Cassie and McKay, both of whom were exceptionally kind to him, considering the fact that Rue had added him as a plus-one a mere thirteen days before their extensively-planned destination wedding. Afterwards, they had spent a few hours exploring the resort’s campus, which was so chock-full of amenities that Fez felt like they were staying at an amusement park. When they discovered that there was a lazy river on the property, they were quick to change into their bathing suits, grab inner tubes, and float around the track mindlessly under the warm Florida sunshine. If this was how the other three days were going to go, Fez could definitely handle it.
They were back in their hotel room now, relaxing on their respective beds and mentally preparing for the night’s dinner party, which Rue had warned him would involve a lot more introductions and small talk.
“Yo,” Fez broke the relative silence of the space. “How come you ain’t never said anythin’ ‘bout Lexi Howard?”
Rue made a humming noise, and the sound almost got lost amongst the steady blow of the room’s air conditioning unit.
“I’m sure I’ve mentioned her before,” she said dismissively. “You prolly just weren’t paying attention.”
He was pretty sure he’d remember Rue talking about her childhood best friend. He may have been a bit spacey at times, but he never forgot the important shit. Rue had showed him pictures of her mom, sister, and a few other friends back home, but he was certain he had never seen or heard of Lexi. Deciding that arguing with her wasn’t worth it, he dropped the subject in favor of something more interesting.
“Tell me ‘bout her.”
Rue exhaled roughly. “What do you wanna know?”
“Ion’ know.” He scratched over his beard absently. “What’s she like?”
“Hmm… well, she’s really nice. Like, almost too nice. To the point where it ends up biting her in the ass sometimes.”
Fez had spoken to her twice and had somehow already deduced that much about her himself. Friendliness radiated off of her in every smile she shared. He felt oddly protective, annoyed at the idea of people trying to take advantage of her kindness.
“I already told you she’s fuckin’ brilliant. Let’s see, what else?” She paused for a minute, sorting her thoughts. “She’s super OCD about things. Everything has to be perfect, or she’ll have a mental breakdown.”
Suddenly, the wobbly stool catastrophe made a lot more sense.
“And she’s always been really insecure,” Rue continued. “Like, unsure of herself, I guess. I think ‘cause of Cassie.”
Fez felt inexplicably affronted by that. “What’s she got to be insecure about?”
Rue wriggled around on her bed, hiking the covers further up herself to get more comfortable. Fez impatiently awaited her response over the groaning of the mattress springs.
“I don’t know. Girls are different from guys. There’s like… societal pressure and shit. And then growing up alongside Cass, who was like a fuckin’ supermodel by fifteen, didn’t help the situation.”
“What’s that s’posed to mean?” He was genuinely confused by her explanation. “Why you actin’ like Lexi ain’t a supermodel too?”
“Jesus Christ,” she groaned. “I’m not acting like that! I’m just telling you how Lexi’s brain works.”
“Lexi’s fuckin’ fine,” he emphasized.
“I know she is! I never fucking said she wasn’t,” she insisted, annoyed. “You’ve met her once, Fez, no need to get all defensive.”
He wasn’t annoyed with Rue in the slightest. Really, he was annoyed with whoever or whatever made Lexi so devoid of confidence. It was something he had picked up on during their very first encounter. He recalled the way she had clambered out of his arms in distress, like she was scared Fez would be annoyed that he had to catch her. Then he remembered the look on her face when she discovered that Rue and Fez were ‘dating,’ and he wanted to bury his head in the fucking pillows. He was well aware that the chances of Lexi being as interested in Fez as he was in her were slim, but the thought of making them even slimmer was painful.
“By the way— You call me ‘Fezzy’ in front of her one more fuckin’ time, deal’s off. I’m headin’ right the fuck back to Cali.”
“Dramatic, but okay.”
“I ain’t playin’,” he grumbled. “That shit was embarrassing.”
She snickered. “I said okay.”
At the end of the day, he was being a little dramatic. After all, he had just met Lexi. The problem was that he had never been as instantly drawn to someone in his life. Something about her just pulled him in, like a moth to a damn flame. He knew logically that he wasn’t here for any romantic pursuits, but at the very least, he could get to know Lexi better— and preferably not while under the alias of ‘ Fezzy.’
“You see that girl that’s always with Lexi? The blonde?” Rue asked out of the blue. Fez nodded absently, trying to recall her. “She’s like… really fuckin’ pretty.”
Honestly, Fez couldn’t remember what her face had looked like in the slightest. All he could recall was a tall blonde standing beside Lexi while she stressed over yet another aspect of the wedding décor.
“Yeah. She cute.” Rue glared at him. “What?”
“Don’t act like you know who the fuck I’m talking about. All you can fuckin’ see is Lexi.”
And, well… she did have a point there. Rue rolled her eyes in exasperation, but it somehow came off as fond.
He and Rue were lying in perfect mirrors of each other, both of them on their backs and staring up at the ceiling. Fez couldn’t stop thinking about Lexi, and Rue, he assumed, couldn’t stop thinking about all the conversations she was about to be thrust headfirst into.
Fez could tell that she was nervous about being forced to socialize, but when he thought about Lexi, he wasn’t sure why Rue was so rattled about the whole thing. Lexi seemed like the last person that would judge Rue for who she was. If the rest of Rue’s friends were anything like her, he couldn’t imagine it being a real issue.
Of course, anxiety isn't always rational, and Fez knew this. So, he turned onto his side to face Rue, readying himself to give her a much needed peptalk. He swallowed thickly at the sight of her. Her eyebrows were pinched with tension, and her hands were clenched in tight fists. The stress was practically rolling off of her in waves.
He felt like a piece of shit. After all, this was why he was here. As much as he joked about this trip being a hardship on him, he would accompany Rue a thousand times over if it made her more comfortable. He resigned himself to put his crush on Lexi aside and focus on his best friend.
“You good?” She nodded unconvincingly. He huffed out a laugh. “C’mon now. You ain’t gotta lie to me.”
She exhaled carefully. “I don’t know. This sounds fuckin’ terrible, but lying to my old friends isn’t that hard. When my mom and sister get here, though…”
Her mouth twisted up anxiously. Leslie and Gia, who Fez had only met through various FaceTime calls, weren’t arriving until Saturday, with Leslie unable to take off work and Gia unable to miss out on school. Rue was worried that they wouldn’t buy their fake relationship act, but Fez thought that she was even more worried that they would. She felt bad lying to them but also wasn’t ready to tell them the truth just yet. Fez felt his heart ache for her, wishing he could do something more to help.
“Everythin’s gon’ be just fine, Rue,” he assured gently. “Ain’t nothin’ to worry ‘bout. You know I gotchu.”
Her head turned toward him, her eyes shining with gratitude. It was sweet, the way he could tell she was genuinely touched. It was as if she wasn’t aware of the lengths he would go for her, despite the fact that he had literally agreed to fly to the other side of the country with her to be her fake boyfriend for four days.
“Thank you.”
“You welcome.” He grinned warmly at her. “We gon’ be the flyest fake couple around. Know that.”
—
Fez and Rue returned to the pavilion later that night after having pregamed with a few shots of vodka each for the dinner party that neither of them had much interest in attending. Fez quickly discovered, however, that he actually did have interest in attending once he spotted Lexi Howard approaching their table.
She was gorgeous at brunch under the warmth of the sunlight, but she was just as stunning tonight under the milky glow of the moon. She had changed into a soft pink silk dress that made it incredibly difficult for Fez to look away. He silently scolded himself for being such a terrible fake boyfriend to Rue, having eyes for other girls and shit. It didn’t stop him from smiling like a fucking geek and greeting her with, “Lexi Howard, how you doin’?” as soon as she was within earshot.
She beamed at that, pulling out a seat across from Fez and Rue. She was accompanied by a tall blonde girl in a funky outfit that reminded Fez of something Rue would wear. He quickly realized that this was the girl Rue had asked him about.
“Hi!” she said brightly. “I’m doing pretty well, all things considered. Thanks for asking.” And she looked actually grateful. Like people didn’t ask her how she was doing very often. Fez was beginning to notice a pattern. “Anyways, this is my friend, Jules!”
Jules waved at them with a grin, and Fez felt Rue’s hand squeeze his own under the table. He shot her a confused look, halfway offended that she had distracted him from his continued appreciation of Lexi’s dress.
“Hey!” She waved at them endearingly. “Do you guys mind if I sit with you?”
Collectively, the group profusely welcomed her, and she sat down beside Lexi as everyone rushed to introduce themselves. They were sitting with some of Rue’s other high school friends, the names of whom Fez had promptly forgotten as soon as he was told. He was pretty sure Lexi had sat beside the girl named Kat, but he wouldn’t bet money on that. She had hugged Lexi to her side happily, their cheeks pressing together.
“You’ve done such a great job with everything, Lex.”
Her cheeks reddened a bit at that, and she brushed off the compliment. “Thank you. I mean, the wedding planner took care of most things—”
“Bitch, don’t even try it,” the dark haired girl with elaborate eye makeup— Maddy, Fez thought — cut in. “I’ve seen you fix like a million fucking decorations in the last hour. Own your shit, Little Howard.”
Fez smiled. It was good to know that someone was there to counter Lexi’s downplaying of her accomplishments, which was apparently a constant battle.
“Anyways,” Kat said, shooting Maddy a look. “It’s good to see you. We thought you’d have to sit at the big kids table, being the MOH and all.”
She gestured to the table at the front of the pavilion where Cassie, McKay, and their parents were seated. Lexi’s eyes followed the movement.
“Oh, no,” she clarified. “Most of the events leading up to the wedding are pretty informal.” Almost everyone in the group appeared to be holding back a laugh at that, considering the fact that they were currently eating a four-course meal in an exquisitely decorated beach pavilion. “So like, the bridesmaids and groomsmen can do whatever they want. We only have assigned seating for the rehearsal dinner and reception.”
They all nodded at that, and Fez’s eyes once again made their way to Lexi’s. She was already looking at him, and she gave him a tiny smile, which made his heartbeat fucking wild. Behind her, through the open gap of the tent, the dark expanse of the ocean crashed repeatedly into the shore, providing a lulling chorus as background music for the pavilion’s various conversations.
“Well, this bridesmaid needs another drink.” Maddy stood up and hiked her extremely short mini dress down. “Anyone else?”
Kat nodded, and the two of them walked toward the open bar, leaving just Fez, Rue, Lexi, and Jules at the table. And, since Rue had been acting extremely fucking weird ever since Jules had sat down, Fez had a feeling he would be forced to carry the conversation for their side of the table.
“So, Jewel…” he said, his drawl a bit slower than usual, a side effect of the pre-dinner shots. “How you an’ Lexi meet?”
A genuine laugh bubbled out of her at that. “It’s Jules.”
Well, fuck. He hadn’t had nearly enough shots to excuse that particular blunder. He couldn’t really find it in himself to care that much when he saw that Lexi had also let out a small laugh of amusement.
“Oh shit. My bad.”
She waved him off. “You’re fine! I like Jewel, actually,” she informed happily. “Lexi and I are family friends. We lived in different cities growing up, but our parents knew each other in high school and have always been close.”
The conversation took off from there, with Rue eventually emerging from her strange, silent stupor, and the four of them trading stories back and forth. Fez was shocked when he realized that he was truly enjoying himself. He had not expected to vibe with so many people at a rich white people wedding. When he spent a little too much time making googly eyes at Lexi, Rue kicked him under the table, which spurred him into throwing an arm around her shoulders. He ignored the way that both of the girls seated across from them seemed to track the movement with eerily similar, almost pinched expressions. They were both quick to recover, though, launching into more conversation easily.
“Hey, so, Jules and I were talking about having a beach day tomorrow. You know, since it’s like, our only free day,” Lexi explained. “Would you guys maybe want to join us?”
The answer was an absolute fucking yes, but Fez was waiting for Rue to take the lead. When she took too long to respond, his eyes flitted to her. She had a deer in headlights expression on her face. The silence stretched on for so long, Lexi began to doubt herself.
“You don’t have to!” she rushed to amend. She had this terrible look of dejection on her face that made Fez’s chest tight. “You guys probably had plans to spend the day together. Sorry, I didn’t mean to pressure you.”
Fez wanted to groan at that. Since Rue had apparently no intention of speaking any time soon, he had to take matters into his own hands. He leveled Lexi with the kindest, most appreciative look he could conjure up.
“Nah, you good, girl.” Lexi’s lips curved upward, and Fez felt like he had accomplished his mission. “We ain’t got plans. A beach day sounds fuckin’ great. Right, Rue?”
He turned to her awaiting a response. She swallowed and then nodded, and Fez distantly thought that she looked a bit nervous, which was something he’d have to ask about later.
“Great! We can stop by your room tomorrow so we can all walk together.”
“Perfect,” Rue said, pasting on a smile that looked more like a grimace.
—
Fez and Rue stayed at the pavilion for another hour or so, hanging out at the (graciously open) bar with Maddy and Kat. Most of the guests had already filtered out of the tent and returned to their rooms, but four broke college students were not about to take free drinks for granted. Unfortunately, Lexi had more wedding duties to attend to, so she had taken off as soon as she was finished eating, excusing herself from the table in a rush.
Fez was about ready to head up to their room, but Rue still had a full glass left to drink, and her conversation with the girls didn’t seem to have an end in sight.
He sighed and scooted his barstool back. “I’mma be right back, ladies.” Rue looked at him questioningly. “Gotta pee.”
He headed toward the lobby bathroom but was halted in his stride when he heard hushed tones emanating from around the corner of the pavilion. He recognized the voice of one of the aggressive whisperers as Lexi, and the intensity of her tone had him a little worried.
When he rounded the corner, he saw Lexi standing against the tent wall with a stricken expression as a tall guy towered over her with an angry look.
“I’m not trying to upset you,” Lexi said quietly.
The guy let out a derisive laugh. “Of course not. Perfect little Lexi Howard never means to upset anyone.”
Fez had only heard the tiniest fraction of their exchange, but the way the guy was speaking to Lexi was enough to anger him.
“Yo,” he shouted into the humid night air. Both of them turned to the new voice, and Lexi looked relieved to see him. That told him everything he needed to know about the interaction. “This guy botherin’ you?”
The guy looked at him with a scowl. “Who the fuck are you?”
Fez racked his brain, trying to figure out the exact same thing about him. He was almost positive the guy had to be Nate Jacobs, based on his notable height and general appearance, both of which Rue had informed him on during their lazy river expedition this morning. He wasn’t sure how Lexi could be in a borderline relationship with someone that she looked this afraid of.
“I wasn’t fuckin’ talkin’ to you,” Fez pushed out, jaw clenched. His features automatically softened when his gaze returned to Lexi, who still looked fucking terrified. “Lexi? You good?”
“Yeah.” She extricated her body from the guy’s space and planted herself at Fez’s side. “Would you mind walking me to my room? Please.”
Nate scoffed at the question, like he thought she was pathetic for asking. He had an annoying smirk on his face that Fez simply wanted to punch off.
“Somethin’ funny?”
The thing was, Fezco knew guys like Nate. They were all bark, no bite. Total fucking pussies. Nate would run in the opposite direction if he was ever beefing with someone like Fez.
He went silent.
“That’s what I fuckin’ thought.”
“Whatever, man.” Nate brushed it off with an annoyed look. “I’m done.”
He turned on his heel and stalked off toward the lobby. Fez pivoted toward Lexi, not giving a single fuck about Nate now that he was gone. He reached out to gently touch her wrist.
“You sure you good?” She nodded. He wasn’t totally convinced.“C’mon then.”
“What?” Her eyes were wide. “Where are we going?”
Fez shot her a confused look. “I’mma walk you to your room.”
“Oh.” She nervously shifted her weight. “You don’t have to if you’re busy. I just asked because I didn’t want to be alone with him.”
“I ain’t busy, Lexi,” he reassured. “Quit worryin’. It’s dark out, and there are apparently douchebags hangin’ around in the bushes, so I’mma walk you to your fuckin’ room.”
She smiled at him gratefully, and Fez felt warmth flush through him. He sent Rue a quick text letting her know he’d be back to the pavilion to get her as soon as he dropped Lexi off. When she responded with a thumbs up, he figured he was in the clear.
“You wanna tell me what all that was about?” he asked as they made their way down the path to the lobby.
She sighed, shaking her head. “It’s nothing. I just— I think I messed everything up with him. He’s mad at me.”
He blew out a breath of air between his lips. “I fuckin’ doubt you did anythin’ wrong. Guy seems like a bitch.”
She laughed at that, her hand coming up to cover her mouth. Fez was happy that the anxious expression she had donned earlier was nowhere to be found.
“I don’t know. Ever since like, middle school, people have been pushing a relationship onto me and Nate, but I don’t think I actually like him? I don’t really enjoy spending time with him. To be honest, he kind of scares me. And I don’t want to disappoint anyone, but—”
“Disappoint?” He stopped in his tracks, turning toward her. “You think you gotta date someone just ‘cause everybody tells you you should?”
She looked hesitant to answer. God, Lexi took people pleasing to another fucking level.
“Lex,” he said, testing the nickname out. He liked the way it rolled off his tongue. “No. That ain’t how it works.”
“I don’t know. I’m not like—” He could make out the faintest hint of a blush coloring her cheeks under the starlight. “I don’t have a lot of experience with relationships, other than this thing I’ve had with Nate. I don’t know how it’s supposed to work.”
Somehow, that shocked him. He had no clue how a girl like Lexi didn’t have guys throwing themselves at her, but the sad look on her face made him want to pull her into a hug and soothe all her worries.
“Not like that. For starters, you ain’t s’posed to be scared of the person you’re with.” Frankly, the thought of Nate scaring her pissed him the fuck off. He should’ve rocked his shit the second he saw Lexi’s face of distress. “Usually, you start feelin’ a person, and you hope that they feelin’ you too.”
“How do you know if they’re feeling you, though?”
The insecurity in her voice, in her expression, made his chest physically ache.
“You’ll just know,” he said, rather helpfully.
“Is that how things happened for you and Rue? You both just knew?”
“Fuck no,” he huffed out on a laugh. “Rue and I… we a lil’ different.”
He didn’t elaborate on that. He had no rational explanation for how the two of them had ended up together on account of the fact that the two of them hadn’t ended up together.
“Oh,” she said, her voice small. “I see.”
They were inside the hotel now, making their way to the elevator. He stepped aside for Lexi to enter it first, then watched as she pushed her floor button.
“But what if you don’t?” she asked after several moments of silence.
“Huh?”
“What if you don’t know that someone likes you, but you know for a fact that you like them?”
“Then I guess you just have to ask ‘em.”
“Shit,” she said in disappointment, and the curse word sounded almost wrong falling from her lips. “That sounds like a lot for me.”
He laughed at her disgruntlement. “Look, Lex. You ain’t gotta worry about that.”
Her eyebrows furrowed. “Why not?”
He shrugged, leaning his back against the elevator wall. “‘Cause I can guarantee that if you’re feelin’ someone, they’re feelin’ you right back.”
There was silence for a moment as Lexi’s gaze remained on her feet. The elevator was starting to move now, steadily ascending to her floor, but she said nothing. She seemed to be wrestling with something inside her head.
Eventually, her eyes met his. “Are you… making fun of me?”
“What?” he asked in a shocked breath of air. “Fuck no— I’m dead fuckin’ serious, Lexi.”
“Oh. Sorry.”
He sighed. “Look, I know we don’t know each other that well, but within a day of meetin’ you, I already know that you nice, smart, and cute. Anyone with half a brain would want you.”
“You really think so?”
He leveled her with a look. “One thing ‘bout me— I ain’t a liar.”
He felt kind of bad about that, considering the fact that his entire fucking presence at this four-day wedding event was based on a lie, but then she smiled at him, and he forgot to care. After all, this particular lie was allowed, since he was doing it to help a friend.
“You good at decorating shit too. Not so great at standing on stools, though.”
She let out a laugh at that, the elevator dinging to let them out on the second highest floor of the building. They walked to her door and she pulled out her keycard.
“Thank you. For like, everything.” She tucked her hair behind her ear shyly. “I’m really glad Rue found someone like you. She deserves it.”
As soon as she turned around to tap her card against the reader, Fez let his face fall. His heart sank miserably with it. Lexi opened her door and stepped inside before turning back around. From the sliver of the room he could see, it was obvious that she was in one of the luxury suites, spacious and opulent.
“I’ll see you tomorrow?”
Beach day, right. He had to get his brain back online.
“Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”
She smiled, her sleepy eyes lingering on his. “Good night, Fez.”
And when he turned around to head back to the pavilion, he couldn’t help but wonder how the fuck he was supposed to survive the next three days as Rue’s fake boyfriend when Lexi Howard already had him wrapped around her finger.