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The first thing Komaeda registers when he wakes up that morning is how warm he feels underneath the heavy covers weighing down on his body, but it doesn’t take him long to realize that it’s not the blankets or the sunlight heating him.
It's Hinata.
He blinks dreamily though his morning haze, before turning his head only to be met with a pair of closed eyes and soft freckles. Hinata's breathing is steady, and he holds the covers just beneath his chin in an almost protective clasp, revealing dark, toned arms that had held Komaeda so lovingly just the night before.
A blush begins to fill his cheeks as the memories of last night start filtering through his mind, and he finds himself smiling in bliss - his head abuzz with excitement and his body all filled and warm as he recalls everything that Hinata had given him.
Every single stroke, every single kiss, every single touch. He remembers them all so vividly as if they were the sunlight streaming in through the stained glass of a chapel, the most precious memories laying in his mind.
Komaeda turns to his side to face Hinata properly and at this angle he can truly admire all of Hinata's details when there’s not a stress line streaked across his forehead, not a crease between his eyebrows. Just pure…peace and serenity in his features.
Serenity. You’re my ultimate serenity, Hinata-kun. I love you.
A shaking smile spreads across his features as he runs a delicate finger across Hinata's lips, then strokes his cheeks ever so gently. He can hardly believe that Hinata had not only made love with him once, but twice. It is at these times that Komaeda can appreciate the incredible, tremendous luck he has.
And it had single-handedly been the most memorable, the most magical night of his pathetic life. Hinata had made him feel so many things at once, had made him feel so many sensations that he’d forgotten his name and he’d cried euphorically and he’d kissed Hinata until he couldn’t breathe and his body trembled. Oh, how he trembled with Hinata.
Komaeda's thumb prods at Hinata's bottom lip, pressing down on it and smiling at the softness of the flesh against his finger. He never wants it to end. If he could, he would make Hinata stay with him forever, although he knows it would be asking for too much.
He knows that one day Hinata will leave him just like the rest, leave him and throw him out like the worthless, waste of space he truly is. But right now, Komaeda thinks, right now he can indulge.
Without really thinking, Komaeda leans forward and plants a small kiss on the tip of Hinata's adorably freckled nose, then immediately on his lips as gently as humanly possible before pulling away.
Hinata makes a small noise in the back of his throat, stirring in his sleep, before all of a sudden cracking his eyes open and meeting Komaeda's gaze blearily.
Komaeda stares at him, half in awe at how beautiful Hinata's eyes are in all their raw, natural colors. One eye a gentle hazel, the other a vibrant ruby. If he imagines hard enough, Hinata's eyes could be jewels inside his sockets, watching him through a glass of distorted edges.
Komaeda's the first to speak, when he notices Hinata still looks half asleep in the way he’ll lazily (yet quite beautifully) flutter his lashes. “Good morning, Hinata-kun.” Komaeda's voice comes out awfully airy and hoarse, and he feels a sudden wave of vulnerability.
It's only then that Hinata seems to process Komaeda, and his eyes take in Komaeda’s face for a second, then they flick to his bare shoulders before he whispers, “K…Komaeda…?”
Komaeda pushes down his small surge of anxiety and he gives Hinata a small smile, before reaching out to stroke Hinata’s cheek with a bony hand. “Thank you for last night, Hinata-kun. It was…the best night of my life.”
Then suddenly, something in Hinata's eyes changes, darkens in a way that makes Komaeda’s blood begin to race inside his veins, and he turns his face away from Komaeda’s hand sharply. Komaeda tries to suppress his whimper of pained dissent. “W-Wait. Last night…? What…What did we…?”
He sees Hinata glance around the room before frantically sitting up in bed and surveying where he was, because apparently Hinata had not woken up in the same state of tranquility and bliss as Komaeda had.
But it wasn’t like Komaeda was expecting anything else.
He feels his stomach turn as he watches Hinata’s eyes settle onto their discarded clothes on the ground, then back to him and when their eyes meet briefly, he can’t quite get a good read on his boyfriend. Hinata looks nothing short of confused and dazed, yet at the same time he looks…
Perhaps it’s shame that Komaeda is seeing in his expression?
Shame…embarrassment… disgust…
“Holy shit…” Hinata mumbles when he tears his eyes away from Komaeda's desperate gaze, running a hand through his hair in what can only be exasperation, maybe stress.
Komaeda feels his body begin to lightly tremble again, and his breath begins to stutter softly. Of course. Of course Hinata would react this way. He hadn’t truly wanted Komaeda, had he?
His eyes blink away a sudden wetness and when he sees Hinata throw the covers off of himself and swing his legs over the side of the bed, his hand shoots out without thinking and he grabs onto Hinata's wrist with a fervor he hadn’t known he possessed.
“Hinata-kun? Where are you going?”
Why are you leaving me?
His voice comes out cracked, but he can’t even find it in him to feel shame with the panic settling over him in a suffocating heat.
“A-Ah, I….I need to go on a walk.” Hinata replies without looking him in the eyes, and his voice is so gentle yet it somehow makes Komaeda want to cry all the same.
Komaeda’s fingers curl around Hinata’s wrist tighter when he whispers, “No, p-please, Hinata-kun, please. ” He can’t seem to find any more words to say with the way his head is spinning and his heart is pounding and aching inside his chest like a hammer against the dullest surface.
Stay.
Stay.
Please. Pleaseplease-
I love you.
He doesn’t know what he’ll do if Hinata leaves him right now. He can’t - he can’t let Hinata leave, not now, not when they just gave their bodies to each other so soulfully, not when they intertwined their hearts so passionately. He would beg and cry if he had to, he couldn’t let Hinata go, and if it made him the most selfish or the most pathetic person in the world, so be it.
The desperation he feels now is a vague callback to when he had helplessly begged Hinata to stay with him during that one time he’d been contracted with the Despair Disease in the simulation, however circumstances are much, much different now.
Hinata pauses and he turns to look at him, his eyes softening the slightest bit and his body slumping as he takes in the pitiful sight of Komaeda, pale and shaking. It is only then that Komaeda feels the tension leaving Hinata's body before he wordlessly slips beneath the covers again with him, laying flat on his back with a blank expression on his face. It seems as if the pleas had gotten to him after all.
Komaeda sighs a breath of trembling relief, and smooths his grip on Hinata's wrist to his hand, holding it there and bringing his naked body closer to Hinata.
He’s shaking. Hard. But he prays Hinata doesn’t notice when he locks his heel over one of Hinata’s calf, and snuggles deep into Hinata’s shoulder while squeezing his hand which is trapped between their enclosed bodies. Hinata relaxes into Komaeda but even then, as Komaeda searches his eyes, he looks distant and awfully conflicted that Komaeda’s anxiety stays rooted inside his mind like the thorns on a rosebush.
“Thank you.” He whispers, and leans as best as he can to press a kiss against the corner of Hinata’s collarbone.
Hinata tenses at the touch, his ears turning the lightest shade of red and he only says, “Komaeda…” with what can only be disgust laced within his syllables.
His stomach twists and his voice comes out weak when he murmurs, “Yes?”
Komaeda waits painfully for a response as Hinata’s gaze slowly lands on him, and his sharp eyes narrow. He’s quiet before he glances down at Komaeda’s body, eyes trailing down to his neck, bruised and kissed, then to his shoulders, to his bare collarbones, to the top of his naked, flat chest before the rest of his body is concealed by layers of blankets.
Komaeda’s eyes flit about uncomfortably, aware of how Hinata is all of a sudden scrutinizing and looking at his frail, boney body with a semblance of repulsion in the way his mouth will twitch as if hearing a mildly amusing joke. It makes Komaeda's skin crawl and his hands shake.
He must be so disgusted with Komaeda. Komaeda looks like an absolute wreck - pale and sweaty, skinny and broken - just a scared, pathetic boy. Hinata could do so much better than him.
Komaeda wants him to say something, anything to cut this torturous tension and Hinata seems to read his thoughts because he finally speaks, but the words that come out are enough to make Komaeda want to curl up and die.
“We didn't actually do that, Komaeda, did we?”
Komaeda bites his lip hard, and glances to the side, fighting against the increasing pressure behind his eyes. He thinks his heart shatters.
“No. We did.” He remains lying on his side and buries his head closer into Hinata’s shoulder. “If you don’t want anything to do with me from this moment on, then I understand, Hinata-kun.”
“What?” Hinata says, and blinks before taking in how hard Komaeda is trembling and how vulnerable he actually looks in his position, clinging to Hinata like a lifeline.
“Because…” His voice begins wavering and he keeps the tears gathering in the corner of his eyes from falling. He wills himself to calm down, taking in a shaky inhale of air and closing his eyes before whispering, “Y-You regret it, don’t you?”
“I-“ Hinata cuts himself off, before he pauses and his eyes begin to refocus, connecting his mind to reality once again. “No, I - Komaeda, that’s not it.”
He begins extricating himself from Komaeda’s hold, drawing his hand back and untangling their limbs beneath the blankets. A helpless whimper escapes Komaeda before he realizes Hinata is only doing it to turn onto his side and face Komaeda in a position much more direct - as compared to when he was on his back, facing the ceiling and craning his neck to speak to him.
But perhaps he’s only gotten like this so he can properly tell Komaeda how he doesn’t want him anymore - how he’s tainted his body like the mortifying creature he is and how Komaeda had stolen his virginity.
Komaeda’s vision blurs violently at that thought specifically and finally, tears begin falling down his cheeks when he hurriedly says, “I’m sorry, Hinata-kun, I’m so, so sorry! I shouldn’t have ever pushed you, I-I know, and I knew you would hate it, I j-just really love you and I wanted to try to feel good with you but I ruined it all like I always do and-“
“Komaeda!” Hinata interrupts, placing a hand on his cheek and making Komaeda gasp lightly at the first show of physical initiation from Hinata. His large, green eyes widen and he lets a soft sob escape him when Hinata swipes a stray tears off his cheek.
“That’s - that’s wrong. I didn’t hate it - nor did I regret it.” Hajime says, rubbing his cheek gently and Komaeda allows himself to melt into the touch, warm and reassuring. “How could I ever regret what happened last night…?”
Komaeda swallows, and he blinks more tears from his eyes before he asks brokenly, “Then…T-Then why were you reacting so disgusted before? You were…going to leave me…”
Hinata seems taken aback by Komaeda’s words, despite how obviously repulsed he had been - had he not been disgusted? Had he not been regretting ever touching Komaeda’s worthless body? “I…no. I’m sorry. Fuck. I didn’t mean for it to come out that way, I just - “ Hinata stammers and glances away shamefully.
He waits for Hinata to elaborate, eyes scanning Hinata’s face for any semblance of discomfort or dread at the prospect of being with him because Komaeda is almost a hundred percent sure that Hinata feels both discomfort and dread at the thought of having lost his virginity to somebody like Komaeda.
It makes Komaeda feel sick and dizzy inside his own head, an overpowering and nauseating wave of emotions overtaking his system as he considers what he’ll even do if that’s the case - would Hinata just…break up with him?
He’s read thousands of stories and heard about how taking a relationship to the next base could result in a multitude of consequences, and Komaeda had considered it, he really had because he was nothing but mindful bordering on paranoid about his choices. Yet of course…he just had to force Hinata into something Hinata probably never even wanted.
Just as more tears begin rolling down his cheeks as his mind tortures him with more cruel, cruel thoughts, Hinata speaks again once he seems to gather his words and says, “I guess I was having a random, minor sexuality crisis…because I never really imagined that my first time would be with a…you know. Another boy.”
Oh.
When Hinata meets Komaeda’s wide eyes at the last word, he quickly goes to brush the tears off Komaeda’s wet cheek again, his expression softening into something that looks like a mix of pity and comfort.
“A-Ah.” Is all that Komaeda can seem to muster.
It’s not like he’s all that surprised. Hinata had talked to him about this once - his somewhat linear perspective on his own sexuality until he’d met Komaeda and when he’d done more reflecting, he’d realized he’d been heavily closeted throughout his Hope Peak years.
All of a sudden, a memory comes back to him, when Hinata had confided in Komaeda and admitted he had a crush on one of his male classmates. Hinata had begun describing him physically, his face turning somewhat dreamy only to abruptly stop and laugh when he saw Komaeda’s darkened frown and the pout on his lips.
“You really liked him, huh…?” Komaeda asked, eyes averting to the ground.
Komaeda couldn’t see it, but a smirk was on Hinata’s lips as he rolled back and forth on the balls of his heels and said,“Yeah…he was like, the nicest guy I ever met.”
“Ah…I see.” Komaeda mumbled, his stomach churning and his fists clenching and unclenching inside his pockets. The thought of Hinata having a crush so strong for someone that wasn’t him made him feel slightly light-headed.
“Yup, and the sweetest. Cutest too. Big brown eyes, curly hair, freckles…” Now that got Komaeda, especially when Hinata would make it a point to always tell Komaeda how adorable he thought he was, and Komaeda looked up at Hinata with hurt, betrayed eyes.
“..Really? He was…that cute…?”
“Yeah.” Hinata shrugged, willing the smile away as Komaeda searched his expression.
“Cuter than me?” Komaeda asked, the jealousy loud and clear in his tone and the childish question slipping off his tongue before he could properly think about what he was saying, but when Hinata laughed, and shook his head, Komaeda blinked in confusion.
Hinata leaned in to peck Komaeda on the cheek before pulling back, leaving Komaeda flushed and soft inside and saying, “No. I’m just kidding, Ko. You’re my number one - always.”
Komaeda blinks as the memory slowly washes out of his mind and makes his heart warm and light. Something in the way Hinata was so comfortable around him to be able to speak about those things, and the way Hinata had teased him only to hastily assure him that Komaeda was the only one in his heart makes him feel absolutely euphoric.
But…still…
It’s besides the point, because albeit how much Hinata may have liked that one boy in his class, he knows Hinata has a clear preference when it comes to boys and girls.
He draws the sheets up closer to his shoulders, and his question comes out in a raspy whisper.
“Would you have preferred it to be with a girl, Hinata-kun?”
Hinata seems somewhat shocked by Komaeda’s question, blunt, straight-forward yet heavy with insecurity all the same and he quickly shakes out of his stupor and says, “No…of course not. You’re the only one I wanted to do this with, Komaeda.”
“But…” Komaeda looks to the side, even when Hinata continues stroking away the tears trickling down his cheeks. “I-I’m sure you'd have enjoyed it much more if only I wasn’t…like this…if only I had a body you could be happy with…”
Komaeda didn’t have the supple body of a girl - his body was all bones and no curves. He didn’t have breasts, he didn’t have any of it, nothing about him was feminine in the way that could ever be remotely attractive.
Then Hinata says, “No, Ko, don’t say those things,” His voice comes out harsh, leaving no room for arguments and Hinata reaches up to grip onto his cheeks with both hands now, his touch warm and calloused. “I need you to listen to me, okay?“
Komaeda’s eyes widen as he takes in the feeling of Hinata’s hands around his face like this, squishing his cheeks ever so gently before he nods his understanding.
Hinata sighs. He closes his eyes for a moment, as if pondering what to say, before slowly opening them again and uttering, “I…I like you the way you are. I don’t want you to keep thinking these things, ever , because they couldn’t be farther from the truth. You and your body…t-they’re perfect, Komaeda.” The last sentence comes out in barely a whisper.
Komaeda doesn’t know how he can believe something like that, but the sentiment and genuity in Hinata’s voice makes Komaeda’s heart jump several beats. “That’s…”
“That’s the truth.” Hinata asserts, before finally leaning in to kiss Komaeda’s already long, bruised lips from the night before. Komaeda gasps into the kiss, his body shaking as he lightly grabs onto Hinata’s wrists not to pry him away, but to ground him there.
Hinata deepens the kiss, his right hand coming up to tuck one of Komaeda’s unruly locks behind his ear and stroke the side of his hair tenderly before imbedding fingers through the white tresses. Komaeda whimpers into the kiss, opens his mouth eagerly for Hinata and Hinata takes the chance without hesitance.
Komaeda’s surprised to find that Hinata has no trace of morning breath - just that same, citrusy taste of sunshine on his tongue coating Komaeda in all its benevolence, beauty, its fucking purity.
Komaeda can never get enough of Hinata. He will never get enough of this for as long as he lives, he wouldn’t mind if Hinata kept him like this forever - with love and arousal running through his veins and hope flooding his vision as Hinata kisses him hard, long and deep.
When Komaeda begins softly whining into the kiss and drool has begun leaking from between their mouths, Hinata finally pulls away and his face is flushed, the tips of his ears a dark red.
Komaeda heaves, lowering his eyelashes but maintaining eye contact with Hinata as Hinata pants softly through his nose, a sound that is much cuter than Komaeda had expected.
But he doesn’t understand. He truly doesn’t understand. Surely this is out of pity…how could Hinata possibly stand kissing something like him?
Komaeda’s fingers squeeze around Hinata’s wrists when he mutters, “But…Hinata-kun…I’m - I’m so disgusting. Just…just look at me.”
Hinata’s lips pull into a thin line before he wets them and his eyes trail down Komaeda’s body, where pale shoulders peek out from sheets that had been pulled down as a result of their hasty kissing, where his bare chest bounds up and down with every breath he takes. He glances back up to meet Komaeda’s eyes, which have now dried yet remain red and swollen.
The corner of Hinata’s mouth lifts when he goes to pull Komaeda in closer by the back of his head, leaving their lips not even a centimeter apart and Komaeda feels himself growing slightly dizzy from how close in proximity they are yet how far apart they seem to remain. He needs to feel him.
He…he needs-
“I am.”
Komaeda widens his eyes and before he can properly react to Hinata’s encroaching whisper, before he can even think of a response, his mind moves on auto-pilot and he closes the distance between them once again, albeit much more desperately. He practically crashes their lips together in a frenzied hurry, his heart wrenching in his chest and his mind a flurry of thoughts, his love for Hinata being emphasized in every sound he let out inside Hinata’s mouth and every time their tongues passionately met.
Hinata pulls away with a pop, and before Komaeda has time to think, his hands all of sudden move from the back of Komaeda’s hair to his shoulders, and he flips them around abruptly. Komaeda loses his grip on Hinata’s wrists and he lets out a helpless gasp when Hinata pins him to the bed, pressing his shoulders down against the mattress. With Hinata above the sheets and Komaeda’s lower body underneath, they aren’t touching where Komaeda particularly wants them to touch and Hinata’s legs entrap Komaeda’s, giving him no leeway.
He sees Hinata smirk, and he can only stare with his mouth half-parted and his tongue practically lolling out of his mouth at how ravenously they had kissed before Hinata dips his head down and attaches his lips to Komaeda’s collarbones.
Komaeda’s body trembles, and he lets a breathy moan rip through his throat at just the sensation of Hinata’s lips on another part of him. Hinata’s teeth brush against the structure of his bones, before his tongue presses on the spot and he starts sucking relentlessly. Komaeda brings his arms up to hook around Hinata’s neck and his legs twitch with the desire to wrap them around Hinata’s back, but with how Hinata’s pinning him down and how the sheets are still effectively on him, smothering him in an oppressive heat in his lower region, he’s completely immobilized.
Hinata softly lifts his mouth from the one spot on his pale collarbone, smiling down at how red and bruised he left the area before immediately working on another part of Komaeda, a sensitive spot right above his collarbone and just under his neck.
“H-Hinata - Hinata-kun…” He whines, his face flushing and his body arching into the touch desperately.
Hinata only hums in response, nipping at the pale skin of Komaeda’s neck gently before full-on biting down on it and Komaeda can’t help but let out a small cry, his body shaking and his legs spreading as far as they can go beneath the sheets. With Hinata’s own legs on either side of his, there’s only so far he can spread them and it makes him whine.
“Hinata-kun!”
Hinata chuckles against his skin and the sound vibrates into the core of his body, making his mind as warm as dripping honey as his fingers thread through the back of Hinata’s hair.
He lets out a plethora of sharp whines and whimpers as Hinata continues marking up the entirety of his neck and collarbone for several more minutes, his lower region stirring and awakening and his groin begging for friction, any type of friction. He feels heavenly - if the way he’ll pant and curl his toes at just about anything Hinata will give him is a giveaway - but it’s still not enough.
So when Hinata pulls away from another section of his neck, his hips buck up of their own accord and his concealed cock bumps right into Hinata’s ass. Hinata widens his eyes, and moves back from Komaeda’s neck to glance down at where the outline of Komaeda’s cock presses through the sheets. The sheets have a telltale splotch of dampness on them, and Komaeda feels his face heat up in both shame and arousal. He hadn’t meant to do that.
“I’m s-sorry…” He sniffles, and averts his eyes to a spot on the ceiling.
“What are you sorry for?“ Hinata asks, and Komaeda finds himself unable to answer as he turns to stare into Hinata’s eyes, ardent yet soft all the same. Hinata lifts himself up, only for the sake of being able to yank the sheets down and he’s quick to move it to the side, down to the foot of the bed, leaving no more obstacles in their path.
Komaeda’s breath makes a sharp inhale as his whole body is all of a sudden exposed. He tries not to think hard on it, instead taking note of how his Hinata looks above him like this, naked and flushed, his eyes shining as he stares down at Komaeda’s body, which is still vibrating and trembling from arousal.
“Komaeda…” Hinata whispers, and he takes note of Komaeda’s legs, pressing desperately against his own and he quickly maneuvers them so instead, he’s nestled between Komaeda’s legs.
Komaeda sighs with the newly given freedom, and he watches as Hinata smiles down at him before going to move his hands down Komaeda’s chest.
Komaeda lets out a startled gasp when Hinata’s fingers brush over his nipples, sensitive and erect, and Hinata chuckles softly at the reaction before he goes to caress the rest of his torso.
“I love this,” Hinata says when he reaches a small mole on Komaeda’s belly, rubbing at it lovingly and Komaeda blushes violently at the words, simple yet spoken so tenderly. Hinata keeps rubbing and stroking up and down the space of his stomach, murmuring soft, sweet words to him and Komaeda can only squeal as Hinata practically gives cherish to his pale belly.
Hinata leans down to leave a kiss on the mole and Komaeda whimpers before Hinata moves up his chest, kissing up his body before hovering his lips just over his nipples.
“And I love these,” Hinata breathes, before bowing down and taking each one into his mouth for brief seconds. Komaeda gasps out loudly, and delivers a long moan when Hinata begins kissing them for longer periods of time, sucking on them and pulling at them with his teeth. His body arches sharply into Hinata’s mouth.
“Please, H-Hinata-kun, hah-a-ahhnn …” His eyes flutter and his hands go to grab onto his boyfriend’s shoulders for leverage, digging blunt nails into his skin. His cock is burning with arousal, his skin dripping in sweat and his face coated in an enticing pink.
He feels Hinata smirk against his skin, before he pulls back, a trail of saliva connecting him to Komaeda’s hard, pink nipples. He watches Komaeda’s small, flat chest heave with the effort before saying, “They’re adorable, just like the rest of you.”
Komaeda looks away and bites his lip, even when a trembling smile begins to stretch across his face and the praise goes right to his lower region and right to the space of his mind that’s telling him he’s undeserving of this treatment. He can barely breathe out a “thank you,” to Hinata.
Hinata gives his nipples one last pinch before moving down again and finally reaching his legs. Hinata’s smile only widens when his large hands go to grope both of his thighs, making Komaeda moan softly. He leans down to nip at one of the twin scares that Genocider Syo had left during his time of despair, and Komaeda makes a weak noise in the back of his throat.
“I love this too.” Hinata mutters, and presses his lips against the line of the scar, holding the kiss before pulling away with a tenderness Komaeda could hardly take nor understand.
“Hi-Hinata-kun…” His eyes flutter shut and he squirms in place as Hinata keeps lavishing his skinny thighs, letting out breathy whine after small moan before whispering, “N-No, ah, t-they’re hideous.”
Hinata only tuts at him in disapproval, murmuring,“they’re not,” and leaving multiple kisses on his thighs before snaking his hands from the space of Komaeda’s milky legs to his ass. He softly gropes and squeezes Komaeda’s ass, cupping both bare cheeks with large hands and making Komaeda moan shamelessly, his cock twitching from the stimulation.
“M-Mmm! Mmm, hah, H-Hinata-kun, ahhn-”
Hinata leaves one last kiss on the inside of Komaeda’s trembling thigh before his hands slip away from Komaeda’s ass and he leans up to situate himself, smiling down at where he’d bruised and left marks on his body.
Komaeda’s thighs - now covered in arrays of hickies and lovebites, leaving them trembling and spread. Komaeda’s neck, his collarbones - now kissed and bruised thoroughly.
Komaeda wants more than anything to ask Hinata to keep kissing him, to keep marking him for his own forever but he knows he’s in no position to. But any other thought or desire he’d been craving is immediately fulfilled when Hinata finally, finally wraps a delicate hand around his weeping cock. Komaeda had been so caught up in the kissing that he hadn't realized his truest desire the entire time.
“Ah, ah! Hinata-kun…h-hah…” Komaeda gasps loudly into the cottage and arches his back into Hinata’s hands, before clamping his mouth shut and whining repeatedly through his nose.
“And of course, this.” Hinata hums, leaning down to loom over Komaeda while pumping him at a tortuously slow pace. Komaeda’s hands grab onto Hinata’s biceps, squeezing tightly and digging his nails in, before squirming and instead bringing them down to lay flat against the sheets. He fists into the bedding lying beneath his sweaty body and writhes as Hinata works him.
“F-Fuck, Hinata-kun, please, hhh, please go faster, pleaseee-“ He begs, and Hinata complies easily, rubbing him down to the shaft with fingers lightly tracing his veins. The sensation of Hinata’s scarred, calloused hand against his most nether region makes him want to go absolutely insane - every cell in his body is yelling with joy and his mind feels overridden by pleasure. He’s panting like a dog in heat now, and tears are gathering in his eyes at both the pleasure and the overwhelming emotions brimming in every tremor he releases.
Obviously, it’s nothing like what he’d experienced last night - that was otherworldly - but there’s something about this that makes Komaeda feel almost as euphoric as he had before.
Perhaps it’s the realization that his dream of Hinata’s hand being the one on his cock, after all those pent up times he’d orgasm by himself, had come true.
Perhaps it’s also the way Hinata had lavished him so tenderly before. But it doesn’t matter - all Komaeda knows is that this is far better than any other time he’d jerked himself off and it far surpasses any of his expectations. He feels like he could be flying with how good, how incredible Hinata is making him feel.
And with the way Hinata will praise him in a voice so rough and gentle all the same, the tears come rolling down his cheeks and he lets out a helpless sob, humping into Hinata’s hands.
Hinata smiles, and says, “Yeah, I think I love this the most,” and Komaeda can only reply by blushing furiously and letting out more breathy moans.
Hinata’s hands trail down to his balls, and he squeezes them before fondling them expertly and Komaeda positively loses it, crying out and spreading his legs as far as they can go. His dick is leaking so much pre-cum, he’s drooling onto the pillow, and he’s crying with how good it feels, but he needs to cum .
“I - I need to cum, Hinata-kun, please, l-let me cum, ah, please-“
“Shhh, I will,” Hinata hushes, and he drags his hand back to the tip of Komaeda’s swelling cock, pursing his lips as he spreads the pre-cum around the tip playfully. For a terrifying moment, he looks just about finished with Komaeda, pondering on his next move before perhaps deciding completely that he’s finished.
So Komaeda looks up at Hinata, his face absolutely wanton and broken as he cries out, “Please, please, please, Hinata-kun, I - AH?!”
Then Hinata effectively shuts him up by abruptly ducking his head down between Komaeda’s legs and licking up the side of his dick all the way from his balls to the tip. His tongue flattens against Komaeda’s cock and he shuts his eyes as he drags his pink tongue up the length of Komaeda’s entire dick.
The warmth of Hinata’s tongue, the cool wetness against his throbbing cock, and Hinata’s soft, breathless sounds as he licks up Komaeda’s length makes Komaeda’s mind completely melt into a puddle of hot, searing lust.
And it’s what Komaeda needs, exactly what he wanted because he orgasms immediately, his body shaking and his mouth hanging open in a loud, high-pitched moan of Hinata's name as cum shoots out of his cock.
His back arches entirely off the bed and his toes curl as tears stream down his cheeks, cumming into Hinata’s gracious hand and Komaeda thinks it might be one of the best orgasms of his life.
But despite how aroused he may feel, his heart still manages to flutter with the way Hinata is staring up at him with a light blush, a smile gracing his soft features in the morning sun and he says it and he thinks it repeatedly, he knows, but god is he lucky.
When he’s finished, and Hinata even helps him get out smaller, brief releases of cum by kissing his dick and giving it the smallest of licks, he breathes rapidly, nearly reaching hyperventilation with the amount of emotions running throughout his mind and body.
His head falls to the side of the pillow, and he can barely see Hinata lift his head out from between his legs, before another kiss is being laid on the inside of his thigh as Hinata effortlessly lifts it up to his lips. Komaeda watches through half-lidded eyes as Hinata leaves another trail of kisses, his leg being upheld by Hinata.
“Every part of you is fucking flawless, Komaeda.” Hinata whispers against his skin, before dropping his leg and maneuvering himself to be above Komaeda again.
He cups Komaeda’s cheeks and turns his head to look into his eyes, and when they properly meet Komaeda lets out a small whimper, his teary eyes shining.
“You really think I could do this with anyone else? Any other girl? You think I'd ever derive that much pleasure from this even if it’s not with you?” Hinata questions, and Komaeda’s mouth parts half in disbelief and half in utter captivation - in awe.
“Never, Komaeda. Never.”
And if Hinata won’t do it, he will - he grabs Hinata’s face with his weak, shaking hands and pulls him down fast into a wet, desperate kiss, needing to show Hinata just how grateful he is, how much this means to him, how full his heart is.
He feels Hinata smile into the kiss and hum whimsically, shoving his tongue into Komaeda’s mouth and letting their tongues meet and interlock, saliva gathering at the edges of their lips. Their teeth collide gently and they both need to pull apart to gasp for air, but it isn’t long before one or the other smashes their lips together again - and usually it’s Komaeda, who squirms and wraps his legs around Hinata’s strong torso, locking him in place.
They make out for several more minutes, and at this point Komaeda’s mind is mush and his body is burning with heat, his voice hoarse from so much gasping and moaning before Hinata moves away with a glowing blush on his face.
Komaeda sighs shakily and he stares up at Hinata in absolute captivation, his heart beating inside his chest and the corner of his mouth lifting into a dopey smile. They breathe and pant together for a moment, taking in each other’s thoroughly debauched expressions before Hinata slowly dips his head down in the space between Komaeda’s jaw and shoulder.
“It’s taken me a while.” He starts, and Komaeda unthinkingly moves his hands to the back of his head, his eyelashes fluttering at the sound of Hinata’s raspy voice. “I didn’t think I could ever like boys the way I do now…but you're the only one I want…and I will tell you for as long as you need me to.”
For as long as you need me to.
Komaeda’s eyes water, and he makes another incoherent noise as his blush darkens. This is too much, it all feels like too much for him to ever possibly understand.
He can't fathom a world without Hinata and yet he can’t quite come to terms with the fact that they had really lost their virginity together last night, that Hinata was okay with him even after it. That Hinata…hadn’t abandoned him yet.
“D…Do you mean it…?” His voice comes out awfully raw from how hard he’d been moaning only minutes before, and he hiccups in embarrassment.
Hinata only chuckles low and deep in his throat, before brushing his lips against the side of Komaeda’s pale neck and affirming, “Yes. I mean it.”
“I really…I really, really like you, Hinata-kun.” He says without thinking, his emotions for Hinata finally boiling and tipping over the edge, his filter slowly disappearing with everything Hinata says or does for that matter. Considering how they just had sex the night before, and how Komaeda had repeatedly professed his love to Hinata, this shouldn’t be anything new for him. Yet he’s still nervous.
But he can’t help it when every soft blink of Hinata’s eye makes Komaeda fall deeper in love, every small breath that leaves his lips makes Komaeda want to draw a map of stars across his tender back and explore them with his own hands.
He’s so in love, it hurts.
He’s wanted him for so, so long and now that he has him, he can hardly believe it to be a reality.
“I really like you too.” Comes Hinata’s response against his neck, short yet whispered as sensually as a deep kiss in the rain among beds of roses and Komaeda feels himself getting dizzy with adoration.
All of a sudden, Komaeda wants nothing more than to see him.
He grabs the sides of Hinata’s head and pulls him up and away from his neck, his movements jerky and shaky, but Hinata only blinks in surprise. His face is flushed, the top of his forehead slightly slick with sweat, and his freckles dance across his features like small petals of flowers.
And his eyes.
One eye a gentle hazel.
The other a vibrant ruby.
They’re so beautiful.
Komaeda sniffs, and he can’t help the tears that slip down his cheeks once more as he softly nudges Hinata down to bump their foreheads together and he says, almost fervently, “Thank you, thank you, I love you, I love you so, so much-“
Then Hinata presses their lips together, and Komaeda makes a small noise that bubbles out of his throat and comes out against Hinata’s mouth before wrapping skinny arms around Hinata’s neck and hooking his legs tighter against Hinata’s waist as their lips simply move against one another.
Even when their tongues don’t meet, even when it’s just their mouths pressing against one another - the desperation is still there, the intensity, the love , and Komaeda thinks he sees the brightest of stars behind his vision and when his eyes flutter open into half-lidded crescents, the ray of light illuminating through their window casts a sparkling halo above Hinata’s head.
Hinata pulls apart for a heartbeat, and only to whisper a rushed, “Me too, I love you,” before immediately locking their lips together again, and Komaeda feels himself shake with the amount of euphoria running through his veins.
Their bare chests press together, and as Hinata strokes down the side of his cheek with one hand, and the other rubs down his side, Komaeda is starkly aware of how surely, how habituated he is in everything he’s doing to Komaeda.
Hinata is kissing a boy. He is kissing Komaeda with a relentlessness yet a softness that fails to communicate anything other than reverence, and for once, a thought in the back of Komaeda’s mind tells him that maybe, just maybe, Hinata isn’t ashamed to be doing this with him.
And suddenly, Komaeda doesn’t feel so ashamed about himself either.