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Tony knows that Peter is lying to him.
He’s not offended so much as he is frustrated, really. All he wants is for the boy he’s come to see as his pseudo-son to feel comfortable enough to tell him to his face that he’s dating another boy so he can begin his relentless teasing and familiar banter just as he would if he was dating a girl — as he’d shamefully assumed he would all these years — but instead, Peter is going to great lengths to hide the truth.
He’d first realised that something was going on when he’d picked Peter up from MIT and found him blushing bright red with a prominent hickey shoddily covered with concealer too dark for his pale skin branded onto his neck. Part of him had been as mortified as Peter had been at the knowledge that his son was having sex, but he knew it was part of life, and he’d prided himself on having an open and honest relationship with Peter for years now.
Looking back, he’s angry with himself for the teasing he so seamlessly slipped into. Not because he regrets making fun of Peter — no, teasing and friendly banter is a key and healthy element of their dynamic — but because he remembers the female pronouns he used without even considering that might not be the case.
There were a couple more instances like these. Once, he’d figured out Peter wasn’t blowing Tony off for coursework like he’d said he was, but to go on a date – he had Ned’s big mouth and terrible lying skills to thank for that reveal. He’d repeatedly caught Peter grinning dreamily at his phone, and he was cagey every time Tony brought up his love life. Every occasion was complete with superfluous and seemingly harmless ribbing, and he hadn’t thought anything of it.
Until a surprise visit to Peter’s dorm room slots everything into place. Because that hoodie thrown over the back of Peter’s desk chairs is decidedly male, and the shoes by the door he knows for a fact aren’t Peter’s are too big to be a woman’s.
His son is dating a boy. And as painful as it is to admit to himself, as much as it makes self-loathing clench in his stomach, he understands why Peter didn’t tell him.
Tony’s been in the public eye since he was barely out of diapers and, although it’s no excuse, it was a different time. He doesn’t remember all the separate instances he said something offensive or harmful, but now that he knows that Peter isn’t straight – and was a fan of his since a young boy – he’s sure that he’ll no doubt have most of them categorised in his mind.
It hurts Tony deeply to think that maybe Peter revisits them when he’s sad, maybe he desperately wants to tell Tony about his new boyfriend but every time he goes to open his mouth, one of those homophobic, ignorant jokes Tony made a decade or two ago comes back to haunt him and forces him back into silence.
So, when it hits a breaking point, when he overhears Peter on the phone in his bedroom talking softly and sweetly to the person on the other end of the line before switching gears quickly when he hears Tony’s footsteps in the hallway, changing his voice to pretend he’s talking to a plumber of all people, he makes a decision.
He’s going to do whatever it takes to get Peter to admit to him that he has a boyfriend. He needs to prove to him that he’s a changed man. He needs to get his son to trust him again.
★
The first thing he does is small, but it feels like a good place to start. He fires up his laptop and spends the entire night researching the LGBT+ community, queer history, and the importance of allyship. His cheeks heat up in shame more than once when he finds his past actions on multiple ‘what not to do’ lists and finds himself confronting his own biases and prejudices head on.
“Honey?”
When he looks up from his laptop, squinting from the blue light having pierced his eyes all night, he sees Pepper wrapped up in the silky blue nightgown he loves so much on her, illuminated by the light of the early morning.
“Are you alright, sweetheart?” she asks, eyebrows furrowed in concern as she walks over to his spot at the kitchen table and wraps her arms around his shoulders, bending down to peer at the laptop screen. “A complete history of the complexities of queer identity? What’s this all about?”
Tony sighs, leaning back to stretch and rub his sore eyes. “Peter has a boyfriend.”
“He does?”
“Yes,” he says, sighing again. “And he doesn’t feel comfortable enough to tell me about him.”
Pepper nods understandingly and takes the seat at the end of the table next to Tony. “Ah.”
Tony looks at her, probably a little desperately considering how bad he feels about his past actions and how little fuel he’s running on right now. “I’m trying to prove to him that he can trust me, but… all this reading has just shown me how offensive I’ve been in the past and all the damage that must have done to him. I don’t even know how he still hangs around with me at this point, let alone finds it in him to call me Dad.”
“I think one thing to consider is that he’s probably faced a lot of adversity in his life,” she says gently, “and sadly, a lot of the people perpetuating that kind of hatred probably looked a lot like you.”
He drags his hands down his face. “Yeah, you’re right. Well, all this reading has given me a couple of ideas to make him feel more comfortable, so that’s at least something.”
“Being a good ally means putting in the work,” Pepper says, taking his hand. “Not just ‘not having a problem with gay people’.”
Tony nods, looking back down at his laptop screen.
“I know you probably want to continue your research,” his fiancée says, “but you’d probably be in a better mindset to do that after a shower and a nap, don’t you think.”
He grins up at her. “Is that your way of telling me I smell?”
She grins back before turning away and making her way into the kitchen, calling over her shoulder, “no comment!”
Chuckling to himself, he goes to obey.
His research has at least cemented in his head that he needs to be doing the work of an ally, not just because his son likes boys, but because it’s the right thing to do. It’s not just about proving to Peter that he’s a good person and he can trust him, but about facing his past actions head on and pushing himself to do better.
So, killing two birds with one stone, he starts to diversify his reading and viewing materials. He tracks down Wanda – he shamefully realises that she’s the only out gay person he really knows – and asks her for a list of the best queer books and films which she happily supplies him with, and he gets to work, reading and watching things he’d never have even considered before. Ironically, though, the first time he brings it up in front of Peter is entirely on accident and not about the mission he’d initially set for himself at all.
It happens when an impromptu holiday takes them to South Beach. They end up driving down Ocean Drive on their way from the jet to the resort they’re staying at, and he can’t help but notice the Carlyle Hotel.
“Oh, that hotel up there is where The Birdcage was filmed,” he points out to the rest of the car, Happy and Pepper in the front and Peter with him in the back.
“What?” Happy asks, confused, clearly not getting the reference.
But Peter, judging by his expression and the way he blurts out his question, understands what he’s talking about and is thoroughly surprised. “You’ve watched The Birdcage?”
He says it so quickly that he looks like he immediately wants to take it back, but it’s only then that Tony realises this is a moment to prove himself as a safe person; someone his son can trust. “Yeah, I watched it with Pepper last night,” he says as casually as possible, trying to meet Peter’s evasive eyes. “It kind of blew me away, actually. It might be one of the best feel-good films I’ve ever watched, especially considering how hard it is to find queer stories with happy endings. It’s hard to believe it was filmed in the 1990s.”
Peter nods in agreement, blushing slightly as he looks away and sinks back into his car seat. Happy, however, stares at him in wonderment Tony isn’t sure whether he should take offence to. “Since when did you become an expert in LGBT+ cinematography, Tony?” he asks incredulously, looking utterly confused.
“Since I realised how badly I needed to diversify my media consumption,” he says simply, eyes returning to the road and staying glued there.
Peter stays quiet in the backseat.
The next instance that gives Tony an opportunity to exercise his allyship is at the end of the very same holiday. He takes the opportunity to bring Peter along to a business meeting he has in Florida before they head back to New York. He is the future CEO of Stark Industries, after all, and Tony likes to take any chance he gets to acclimatise Peter to the culture he’ll be such an intimate part of one day.
The meeting is about the implication of new initiatives Tony’s started to help homeless youth in impoverished areas of the country, particularly how it could work for the population of Miami, which has the highest proportion of homeless people in Florida. Executing such a complex scheme in such a large and diverse region, though, is not easy, and before Tony can get things back under control, tensions start to rise as the heat starts getting to people and the hours tick by without much progress.
Tony’s just coming back from another trip to the coffee machine, handing one cup (full to the brim with creamer and sugar thanks to his son’s incorrigible sweet tooth) to Peter and starting straight in on drinking his, trying to ignore the scorching temperature in favour of a quicker caffeine hit, when it happens. He’s beginning to think that this perhaps wasn’t the best meeting to have brought Peter along to, but Peter had worked so hard in preparing and he’d hate for him to not get the satisfying reward of sorting the problem out, so he decides they’ll stay.
Malcolm, the representative of the organisation Tony had picked to head up the operation gripes frustratedly, pinching the bridge of his nose after they hit another dead end. “Look, that strategy just won’t work. There’s a thousand homeless people in South Beach—”
“That’s not exactly true,” Peter interjects, eager to put his close study of the facts and figures to good use. “There are 1,400 self-reported homeless people in Miami’s South Beach, but adjusting for the hidden homeless population which accounts for around 62% of the total we have to assume that the figure sits closer to 3,684. If we built the housing complex in accordance with the geographical profile—”
“Alright, you know what I don’t need?” the representative shouts over him, raw anger and aggression in his voice. “Some faggy kid who doesn’t know what he’s talking about—”
“That’s enough!” Tony interrupts loudly, cutting the man off firmly, standing up from his position next to Peter leaning against the desk behind them and placing himself in front of his kid. “Now Malcolm, I understand that this project is frustrating and it’s getting to all of us, but I don’t think someone who attacks kids who are just trying to help is the right person to head up a project which will deal closely with marginalised youth. This meeting is adjourned, and I will be contacting your organisation to demand a new representative, since you clearly cannot be trusted with this project.”
Malcolm stares at all of them, clearly steaming with anger and fury, but a furious CEO running on caffeine and fatherly instinct determined to protect his son at all costs is enough to make even the most bigoted of people back down. “Fine,” he spits, grabbing his things as roughly and loudly as possible before storming out of the station.
“Peter, are you okay?” Tony asks, turning around in concern, coming to sit next to him again. The other Stark Industries staff clearly read Peter’s red cheeks and crippling embarrassment and give them some space, exiting the room quietly since the meeting is over anyway. “I’m sorry he said that to you.”
(Tony doesn’t remember saying the f slur for at least the last ten years, but he does cringe thinking he’s most likely said similarly hurtful things. Maybe he’s even aimed them at Peter, years ago. Still, he has a chance to make things right, and that’s what he’s going to do.)
“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine,” Peter replies anxiously, brushing him off as he clears his throat.
“Hey, it’s okay if you’re not, you know,” Tony says gently, nudging his shoulder.
Peter nods hastily, and sniffs in the way he always does when he pretends to not be upset, and Tony realises that because he isn’t out to anyone, being asked about the incident is probably more uncomfortable than brushing it off and moving on.
“I’m always here for you, kid,” he murmurs, grabbing his hand and squeezing it once before pushing off the table and going to join the rest of the staff in the hallway with the intention of dispersing them before Peter has to face them again. “Come and find me when you’re ready. I promise we don’t have to talk about it anymore.”
Peter nods and manages a small smile, and Tony takes it as a win.
Small opportunities to exercise the things he’s learning in his online allyship course crop up over the course of the next month, and Tony grabs every single one by the horns. He tells people off when they tell mildly offensive jokes in his proximity, he updates the company’s harassment policy to make homophobia a fireable offence, and he makes an effort to generously fund LGBT charities and begin his own nation-wide and local initiatives.
He promotes one of the Black, openly gay (not to mention highly qualified) administrative staff to be made head of the newly founded Diverse Recruitment Commission, and not the straight, white, cis candidate the board previously favoured, and he asks HR to include educational materials written and endorsed by LGBT people themselves in their policy and training presentations.
He continues to strive to be a better person, and he’s proud of himself for the progress he’s making. In fact, he’s thrown himself so quickly into the deep end and has become so involved in his allyship that sometimes he forgets what motivated him to begin that research in the beginning.
But he’s come to a place now where he’s accepted that all he can do is his best, and when Peter is confident enough in Tony’s support to come out to him, he will.
He talks to Peter about the films he watches and the books he reads. Rants about the lack of representation in media, in government, in corporate culture (after Pepper had assured him that it’s not performative if he genuinely means it and isn’t fishing for anything from Peter). Cuts out all the ‘gay’ jokes and subtle homophobia he’d found in his language.
He keeps his light-hearted teasing gender-neutral whenever anything hints at a significant other in Peter’s life, as long as they’re on their own or with Pepper. The last thing he wants to do is out him, after all.
Eventually, though, it happens during one of their weekly movie nights, after the pizza they’d ordered has been devoured and they’ve moved onto popcorn for the second film.
“Dad?” Peter says quietly a good twenty minutes into Le Cercle Rouge.
“Yeah, kid?”
“I’m dating someone,” he says, sounding casual to the untrained ear but Tony can hear the anxiety in the undertones of his voice, and he steels himself for what he thinks he’s about to hear. “I have a boyfriend.”
He grins at him, both proud of him and so, so happy for him. “That’s great, Pete. What’s his name?”
Peter smiles hesitantly. “Kiran Flores.”
Tony pauses the film, turning on the couch to look at his friend properly. “And how did you meet this Kiran Flores?” he asks, waggling his eyebrows exaggeratedly, melting a little when it elicits a small giggle from Peter.
“We actually met last November when the roads got really icy and I almost slipped on my walk from the dorms to my lecture,” he explains, smiling. “He happened to be passing the other way and caught me before I fell over, and then he insisted on walking all the way to my lecture with me. We got talking and when we neared the building, I mustered up the courage to ask for his number, and he— he grinned so wide, Dad, and gave it to me straight away. After that, it was a pretty natural progression into a relationship.”
“Kid!” he exclaims excitedly, pushing Peter’s shoulder gently. “That sounds like something straight out of a fairy tale! I’m so happy you finally told me about him.”
“Yeah, I, um, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner,” he says shyly, ducking his head a little.
Tony softens. “No, Peter, you don’t have to apologise. I’m the one who should be sorry. I made you feel like I wasn’t a safe person to tell over the years we’ve known each other, and I’m so sad when I look back on jokes I made and things I said. All along I was hurting you and I was hurting others, and in my ignorance I had no idea.”
“It’s okay.”
“No. No, it’s not okay, at all. But I’m glad you forgive me, kid.”
“I’ve seen you making an effort, Dad,” Peter says seriously, raising his eyes to meet Tony’s, “and I’m glad I have because that’s what gave me the confidence to finally tell you. I know you’re a different, better person now, and I’m grateful for that.”
Tony smiles softly, fondly. “I love you, Pete, you know that?” he asks, reaching out a hand to cradle Peter’s cheek gently. “You’re my son, and I couldn’t love you more or be any prouder of you.”
Peter smiles back shyly. “I know,” he promises, reaching over for a hug. “I love you, too, Dad.”
Tony hugs him back tightly, pulling him into his chest. “So, do I get to hear more about this mysterious Kiran Flores or what? I mean there’s definitely more to your story than him swooping in as prince charming and saving the engineer in distress.”
Peter grins at his joke and nods enthusiastically before diving into a long ramble about his relationship and all of Kiran’s characteristics and the things he loves about him. Tony’s never been more pleased to listen.
★
After the air has cleared between Tony and Peter and he’s finally learned about the mystery man in his son’s life, things seem just a little bit lighter each and every day. They’ve got to the point now where Peter texts Tony excitedly whenever Kiran pulls off some grand romantic gesture or does something small to make him smile, and every time his phone buzzes with a text like that from his kid, he can’t pick it up fast enough.
(He wasn’t at all surprised to learn that Peter had told May about Kiran first since unsurprisingly, she’d known Peter was gay for years. He’s just glad his son had someone he knew loved him unconditionally growing up. He deserves that more than anything.)
However, a month on from the honest conversation between them in which Tony learned who Kiran was, and he still has yet to meet the other man. He understands Peter’s hesitance, though, and he doesn’t want to push, so he lets it go and decides to wait patiently for his kid to be ready.
Eventually, Peter finally works up the courage to ask on their nightly phone call. “Dad, could I—could Kiran come home with me this weekend? I, uh, I think I’m ready for him to meet you and Pepper.”
Tony has to calm himself before he replies – he doesn’t want to sound too eager and make Peter uncomfortable – but he doesn’t manage it very well. “I can’t think of anything I’d like more, Pete. He okay to drive down with us?”
“Actually, I think we’ll take the train,” Peter suggests, and Tony tries not to feel deflated. “I just don’t want the first time you guys meet to be in the back of a car, you know? And I haven’t told Happy yet and I don’t want you to have to drive the whole way—”
“—You calling me old, Pete?” he jokes, interrupting Peter’s anxious ramble. “Seriously, it’s fine, kid. Trains are far more romantic than your old man’s car. But if you’re worried about Happy, don’t be. Believe it or not, he used to be the only one who’d call me out on my homophobic bullshit back in the day.”
“Really?”
“Really. And Happy adores you. He’ll give you a gruff ‘I love you’ and a pat on the shoulder, and that’ll be that.”
“Yeah, you’re probably right,” Peter muses. “Maybe he could meet Kiran this weekend, too?”
“If you’re comfortable with that, Pete, then it sounds like a grand idea.”
He stews with nervousness all Friday morning, anxious about meeting Kiran and making a good impression on his kid’s first proper boyfriend.
“You know he’s supposed to be the one afraid to meet you, right?” Pepper laughs at him, as she watches him with a cup of coffee from the breakfast bar. “Everything’s gonna be fine, honey.”
“I know, I just—” Tony sighs, giving up and going to sit next to her. “I still feel so guilty sometimes and I don’t want to fuck this up by saying the wrong thing. And what if Peter’s told him about me and he hates me for being homophobic in the past? I don’t want this to come between us—”
“Tony,” Pepper interrupts, “you’re overthinking this. You’re not that person. You won’t say the wrong thing. And even if you did, you know how to apologise, and Peter knows how to forgive. All you can do is make the best first impression you can, and I’m sure that everything will be okay.”
Pepper is right, as it turns out.
“Mum, Dad, this is Kiran,” Peter says shyly, stepping off the elevator holding the hand of a tall, Hispanic man matching the photos Peter had shown him perfectly. “Kiran, these are my parents.”
“Kiran,” Pepper beams, stepping forward to shake his hand. “It’s so lovely to meet you! We’ve heard so much about you.”
“It’s a pleasure to meet you, too, Ms Potts,” Kiran says warmly, shaking her hand.
“Nice to meet you, Kiran,” Tony says then, finally taking the step forward to greet him properly.
“Thank you, sir,” Kiran says politely. “Peter never shuts up about you, so I’m glad we’re finally getting the chance to meet.”
“Well, he’s a smart boy,” Tony grins, winking at Peter. “I taught him well.”
“Right,” Pepper says eagerly, clapping her hands. “Dinner is ready, so shall we go and take a seat?”
Peter holds on tightly to Kiran’s hand as they make their way into the penthouse properly, and Tony’s stomach clenches at the thought of his kid still being nervous about things like this; at being the cause of such nerves. Pepper clearly notices his anguish because she squeezes his arm gently as they take their seats at the table, giving him an encouraging smile.
“Sorry I’m late,” Happy says as he strides into the penthouse. “Minor security emergency in the lobby. Now, I hear Peter has a boyfriend I need to meet.”
“Uh, yes, sir,” Kiran says, a little nervous as he gets up from his seat to shake such a large, intimidating man’s hand. “That’d be me. Kiran Flores, it’s good to meet you.”
Happy shakes his hand firmly and eyes him sternly. “Hurt him and I’ll kill you.”
“Oi, that’s supposed to be my line!” Tony interjects, a little put out, but at least it makes everyone laugh, easing any tension Happy’s threat could have caused.
“So, Kiran, what do you study?” Pepper asks politely as everyone serves themselves generous helpings of her famous sundried tomato risotto.
“I’m actually in my last year of studying to be a public defender,” Kiran says, and Tony catches Peter looking adoringly at him. “I want to do my part in making sure everyone has a chance in our criminal justice system, you know?”
Everyone nods in agreement. “That’s very admirable,” Tony comments, making a mental note to look into charities he could support in that vein.
“He’s finishing top of his class, too,” Peter adds proudly, grinning up at his boyfriend.
“Mm, I think I remember hearing a little something about that,” Tony teases Peter, enjoying the blush that immediately covers his cheeks. “Honestly, Kiran, he doesn’t shut up about you.”
Kiran just beams and kisses his cheek. “I bet it’s still not half as bad as how much my friends have to listen to me wax poetic about you, Pete.”
“Well, if they’re anything like us with Pete here,” Tony says, smiling, “then they’ll just be happy that you’re happy.”
They finish the night with ice cream and board games, Kiran melting into the dynamics of the family like he was always meant to be there, and Tony can’t help but hold his boy just a little tighter than he usually does when he says goodnight.
“God, Pete,” he whispers into his hair, “I love you so much, you know that?”
Peter presses closer into his dad’s chest. “I love you, too, Dad. Thank you.”
“You don’t have to thank me for a single thing, alright, bambino? I love you and I’m proud of you and I’m so happy you found someone who cares for you as much as Kiran does.”
Peter smiles up at him, giving him one last squeeze before pulling away. “Night, Dad.”
“Night, kiddo. Sleep well.”