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Last sunset was left behind and Inui Seishu prayed for his scars, and the story that accompanied them, to stop aching, even if for a single moment.
Reality was a heavy weight on his shoulders, building up after many nights he'd tried to bear it. His body a bag that collected every minute, his mind a carousel over and over again returning to the same spot. He needed to break out of that cycle before completely drowning in it.
Time cures all, or so they say, yet Inui was certain that was a big fat lie. At the point he was in his life, he knew he would carry his pain until the day he died. In the end, those scars were part of him and letting go of the pain would also mean letting go of something else. That ‘something’, a memory. That memory, a ‘someone’ whose absence he was unable to cope with.
And still, his capricious fate wanted the most important person left in his world to be the one who revived the memory of the birth of his wounds. The one who saved him from worse ones. It’d never been needed to say it out loud. Every time they were on the verge of an argument, Inui tried to tread on the thin ice with the utmost caution, until, eventually, the memory was unavoidable, and the name of the one who should be there (instead of him) manifested. The deepest wound on his chest. The vastest absence. Akane.
.
In his flight against the ghosts that dwell both, in his own memory, and in the eyes of his dearest friend, he took the course he would follow when he walked after the shadow at his feet and ignored the light behind him. A route that took him away from the stars and put him under the ground. A place few people knew, yet many people filled.
He had been there before. A vibrant, noisy place that smelled of alcohol and humanity. Electronic music and people filled everything, and that everything wasn’t exactly small.
After crossing the door at the bottom of the stair, he was assailed by human warmth on his skin, the vibration of the bass in his bones and the flashing cold-colored lights that interrupted the natural and, in theory, unstoppable passage of time. He let the rhythm of the place hit him and take control of his heartbeat. Inupi immersed himself in the throbbing crowd, in the brush of skin and sweat of strangers, and followed a slow stream toward the bar.
Yes, he could remember getting lost in there before. Not how he found himself afterwards, though he wouldn’t mind about that detail now. He wanted… no, he needed to relive that trip to nowhere. Replicate the feelings, float again to an ethereal Nirvana. Ordering a drink was the first step. Searching for the signs around him while waiting to be served was the second. Suggestive looks, shadows, reflections, or the lack of them.
Several crowds of pale young people in black clothes almost fooled him. However, there was something missing: it could have been an aura of mystery, or a halo of darkness. In short, they were not the true and hungry creatures that roamed clandestinely underground. But Inupi knew that was the place where they patrolled around.
Monsters disguised themselves as mundanes to stalk their victims in that club, but it didn’t mean they hid themselves. They liked to be seen to the naked eye in places where their existence was not a secret and they themselves represented the only enigma to be solved.
He still hadn't found one of them by the moment his drink arrived, so he took advantage of the waiter's presence – as well as his attention to his money – to ask for the only name he could remember.
“¿Is Haitani here tonight?”
The waiter looked him up and down with a raised eyebrow before answering with another question.
“Which Haitani are you looking for?”
Inupi damned in a whisper. He just didn't expect there to be more than one. He took a moment to think about any other memory from that night. The image of petals opening under drops of dark dew filled his mind. The name of a flower…
“Ran. Haitani Ran” he got to say right before definitively losing his listener's attention.
The waiter's weary gaze swept the venue.
“I saw him around a few minutes ago, but... When they want to disappear they leave no trace. It's inconvenient when they have to pay the bill, you know?” The waiter gave him a complicit smile that Inupi didn't bother to reciprocate. “You can try your luck in the private rooms. He likes to hang out there when he finds company.”
With a drink in his hand a ‘thank you’ in his mouth Inupi decided to follow his advice.
.
While crossing the vast space that separated him from the back of the venue, he passed by these groups of young people dressed in velvet, leather and vinyl decorated with lace and spike studs. Some swayed to the rhythm of the rhythmic music, others had intimate conversations above it.
More than one look judged his black t-shirt with the ‘Barbie’ logo, paired with a set of purple jacket and pants and fuchsia pink heels. He wouldn’t usually care about others opinions regarding his way of dressing, but Inupi liked it when he found, among forced disapproval from some, the sincere admiration of those who recognized the provocative purpose of his outfit. His strong and steady steps never missed the rhythm of the bass until he reached his destination.
Long black chiffon curtains covered and separated the spaces that made up the private rooms. It was impossible to discern if Haitani was really there. The only thing Inupi could do was to ask about him to the person who was there to verify access:
She was a girl in excellent upright posture, gloved hands clasped behind her back, dressed in a black suit, white shirt and red tie. Her black hair was tied in a low ponytail and her brown eyes wouldn’t skip anyone approaching her working area.
As soon as Inupi asked her about Haitani, he noticed the strange event. The girl blinked and, by the moment she opened her eyes again, her irises had taken on a violet hue. A chill ran down Inupi's spine. Flashes from the past came to his memory: Ran Haitani's downcast eyes, his white face, and his mouth covered in dark red. Why were those eyes on the girl in front of him? Why did the half smile she gave him feel so familiar?
Another blink and the smile returned to the previous earnest gesture along with the brown color in her eyes, as if they had never changed. The woman stepped aside, gesturing with her hand he could come in, and then added:
“In the twelfth room, sir. At the end of the hall”
He had come this far with the conviction of a pious person before an altar, but, at that moment, a glimmer of sanity poked out within his mind and he hesitated. He saw the shadows he was heading for, sensed the danger he was about to get exposed to, and allowed himself a second to doubt his actions.
Then, a murmur from the end of that hall full of fabrics, tapestries and rugs; a ripple in the dim light that pierced through the last curtain, called him wordlessly. Almost self-consciously, Inupi's feet moved. Muffled, yet firm steps headed towards the deepest canvas of that corridor invaded by hollowed whispers and laughs.
The ethereal black chiffon with the number 12 embroidered in gold had multiple layers. By each layer set aside, the yellowish sparkles of hanging glass drops from the other side became brighter and the figures on a sofa with baroque shapes were drawn more clearly. There were at least two people there, maybe three.
Inupi pushed aside the last veil to reveal the scene. Ran Haitani greeted him with a smile, not bothering to move away from the two bodies that caressed for his attention. To his left a young man with lavender colored hair traced the tattoo on his exposed shoulder with his lips, while the taller boy with dark blue hair to his right brushed Haitani’s long bicolored hair with his fingers.
“Good evening, ‘Barbie-boy’. What do we owe your pleasant visit to?” Far from being embarrassed by the situation, Haitani seemed to find it amusing to read the reaction on Inupi's face before his attentive lovers. The young man on his right began to braid half of his hair, while the one on his left continued kissing his collarbone and moved up to his neck.
Inupi cleared his throat and took a swig from his glass before speaking.
“Well, It could be said that the memories of another night are what brought me here. I was wondering if you had some time for me.” He wasn't looking Haitani in the eye, but he still felt the duty to specify the direction of his thoughts. “I’d like to… repeat what we did.”
Haitani's eyebrows curved in a sad gesture as he watched the hands braiding his hair. They had passed the blond stripe and went on with the darker one.
Then Inupi noticed the cloudy eyes of the young man who was giving his full attention to Haitani. He was lost in thought, abstracted, in an extrasensory trance. Should he be more disturbed by the events unfolding before him? Was envy what he was really feeling?
“Oh, Seishu. Don't think I'm not pleased by your interest. Any other night I’d have gladly accepted, but today… I'm afraid my hands are full.”
Now there was indeed something that worried Inupi. He did not remember telling him his given name. It was never a fact about himself he meekly offered, since he always introduced himself by his last name or, occasionally, by his nickname. Still, the dim gaps in his memory of the night he spent with Ran gave him no certainty about his words and actions back then.
Inupi took another sip of his already meager drink. At the same time, Haitani seemed to pick up something interesting from the curtain that closed the left side of the room. The blonde followed his gaze but a wavy, heavy, black cloth was all he saw.
Haitani let out a quiet chuckle before muttering something along the lines of "Are you interested?" Inupi didn't know if he was talking to him, to the fabric, to one of his companions… He didn't have the time to ask either. The amethyst eyes were faster to link his sapphires.
“You're lucky tonight, 'Barbie-boy'… hey, hey, wait a minute, honey. I'm talking to our guest.” This was said to the young man with light purple hair, who had climbed onto his lap and was trying to drag the collar of Haitani's shirt lower, in search of the ink that decorated his chest. A small wail came from the young man, but he moved back up to Ran's shoulder to apply his kisses there. “You've piqued someone's curiosity, Seishu.”
Inupi's heart pounded at this revelation crowned with his first name. That someone had to be like Haitani. Mysterious, powerful, dangerous… someone who could give him what he needed, after all.
“Can I trust him?” He was trying not to get carried away by his eagerness.
Haitani laughed at that question.
“You doubt him while you were willing to trust me?”
It wasn’t easy to answer that. It was clear from the scene that unfolded before his eyes – and after his own experience – that Haitani was capable of pursuing absolute control over his attendants. On the other hand, after previously doing… that with him, he provided Inupi some kind of safety.
“I know that you are able to respect certain limits. Can I expect the same from that other person?”
“Well, just like any of us, if he doesn't want problems, then he must respect those limits. I can’t say more. You will have to take the risk.” The smirk on his face while he pronounced that last sentence challenged Inupi. “He'll wait for you in that booth, In case you still feel like it.” He nodded to his left. “If not, I would still appreciate some privacy. My boys crave some affection.”
“Thanks Ran. See you next time and... have a good night.” Inupi raised his glass, took the last sip and left it empty on a side table before leaving there.
.
The curtain now to his left displayed the embroidered number 13. He couldn't help but hear Koko's voice in his mind saying he shouldn't go in there. Luckily for Inupi, unlike his 'soulmate', he was not affected by superstitions, so he broke through the layers and layers of black veils with determination, ready to find a similar space to the previous one.
A chandelier hung from the ceiling between suspended dark fabrics. Down, in the center of the room, a lavishly decorated tea table made a vintage-looking sofa face two armchairs of the same style. All the seats were upholstered in velvet, each of them in a different color: brown, red... on the blue armchair, the figure of a llong haired man of uncertain age. Sitting cross-legged, he rested his elbow on the armrest of his seat and his chin on his hand. His dark red suit with billowing black strokes contrasted with the chair he occupied, though his vest and tie were akin to it.
Sharp amber eyes sent a message to Inupi's stomach long before the deep voice reached his ears.
“Welcome Seishu, my name is Baji Keisuke. I’ll be delighted to enjoy your company tonight. Take a seat.”
Inupi sat down on the red velvet loveseat.
“Nice to meet you Baji. I’d rather be called Inupi, though.”
“All right, Inupi. Although ‘Barbie-boy’ suits you quite well.” He added with a smile, oh, a charming smile that took a heartbeat from Inupi, not only because of the beautiful gesture, but also because of the sharp fangs that were put on display.
Inupi's blue eyes were caught in that image, his lower lip between his teeth, his heart in pure excitement.
“Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t my intention to meddle in your conversation,” The lips above the smile pronounced “but, if I didn't misunderstand from the words that, by chance, reached my ears, you were looking for Haitani to do something that few people can do for you. Am I right, Inupi?” The blonde nodded, caressing the velvet covered arm of the sofa with his hand, anticipating how comfortable it would be to lie on that piece of furniture while… “Could you specify, to avoid any kind of misunderstanding between us, what that 'something' is?”
“I want to be bitten.” Inupi answered quickly, “To feed someone with my blood.”
He couldn't express how much he wanted it. How much he needed to feel everything he felt while in between Haitani Ran's sharp fangs. Perhaps his body language was delivering it for him, since the predatory golden gaze he was facing conveyed his satisfaction back.
In an instant, the ‘human’ figure that Inupi faced seemed to dissolve in a dense cloud of black smoke. The ethereal dark mass descended under the tea table that separated them both and slid across the carpet to take a place on the red velvet sofa next to Inupi. There it reverted to the form of Baji’s body, now sitting beside him.
“Did you take anything, Inupi? Any kind of drug or medication?”
He casually slid his arm over the back, just behind Inupi. The dark-haired young man was close, yet cautious enough to avoid physical contact for the moment.
“Just a drink.” Said Inupi, still fascinated by the dark tricks of his date.
It was a matter of time until the emptiness within his ribcage couldn't hold up over the numbness of the alcohol.
“Perfect. Simply, fucking perfect.” Baji's deep voice was almost a purr. His hand sought out Inupi's and brought it close to his face.
That perfect smooth and pale skin felt cold to the touch. Inupi immersed himself in Baji's message-filled gaze before he was blinded by longing as the rosy lips that kissed his hand trailed down his wrist searching for pulse. A caress of his tongue marked the point to pierce. Two white fangs glinted in the light of the lamp.
.
Inupi let out a small, tense 'Ah' from the initial pain, and then… oh, then… moans of pleasure ripped through his lips as he felt the blood leaving his body. His muscles relaxed and he looked up at the ceiling. Baji Keisuke had a front row seat to attend the moment his walls came crashing down and let him be swept away in that sweet ecstasy.
The kaleidoscopic lights reflected by the chandelier‘s crystals exploded into thousands of sparkles. Glitters brighter than constellations, more colorful than a field of butterflies. And as if the butterflies were sprouting from his chest, Inupi felt their flutters run through his full veins until they reached Baji's lips.
He was delighted by that feeling. Nothing else was capable of snatching away his deepest fears, of forcing them out of him like this. Their weight becoming lighter, the minutes more and more insignificant. His pleasure then felt unlimited...
… unlimited, at least, until a new angst set in. Deep down he knew this wasn’t good for his body. What started as a desired pleasure could turn into a nightmare.
What if he overdid it?
What if he went too far, and then, that what is truly eternal and inevitable came to claim him?
…
Would he meet Akane?
.
Hey, 'little prince'. Are you alright?” Baji had released his wrist. He didn't seem to care about the red drops that were falling from his lips to his chin. Something else was bothering him.
Inupi felt the delicate touch of a finger on his cheek. It wasn't until he noticed it was wiping away his tears, that he realized he was crying. His entire body was trembling while trapped in a sudden, deep panic. Definitely, not a side of himself he would show under normal circumstances
Baji pulled him closer in a hug. Somehow his skin felt warmer now. Or was it Inupi who was colder?
“Limits” the blond babbled.
“Do you want to set limits, Inupi? Trace them. Tell me where.”
Inupi rubbed his tears against Baji's shoulder before he could speak. The hand that was drawing circles on his back was comforting him.
“I don’t want to die.”
“No, I would never let that happen. Do you know the trouble I would get into if something serious happened to you because of me?” Inupi didn't say a thing, so Baji kept talking, just in case that could cheer him up. “My ass would be on the most-wanted list, and I'm not talking about police files. We're not allowed to kill, okay?”
Okay… okay, that was fine. But there was more. He had to articulate it even if it was between sniffles.
“I don't want to… (sniff) lose consciousness either. I want to… feel it all and stop… (sniff) before I fade away.”
“Seems fair to me.”
That was it. As simple as that. As he calmed down, Inupi looked up through the dark curtain of Baji's hair.
“How strange,” he remarked in a still congested tone, “your heart doesn't beat, but you're still here.”
The laugh that came out of Baji left a bitter tone in the air.
“You know? I didn't want to die either. Well, maybe I did… a little, but not completely. It's complicated.”
It was time for Inupi to let out a soft laugh. He couldn't understand what Baji was talking about, yet he was versed in complicated feelings.
“Your heart, instead, won't stop beating.” Baji's hand ascended through the blond hair, caressing his neck. “It's strong, brave, tempting...” Soft fingers brushed the pulse of his jugular.
Time cures all, or so they say, yet Inui was born impatient.
He broke away from Baji by leaning back. He grabbed the tie knot of the non-human creature in front of him and yanked it onto him as he finally laid on the velvet. He didn’t need to say a word. Baji traced the pulsing vein with the tip of his tongue for an instant, just before piercing it with his fangs.
'Ah!' The only pain, that sharp pressure on his throat.
‘Hhhmmm…’ Thus the pleasure burst forth again. Faster, more intimate, more intense.
The flutters that ran through Inui’s entire body swirled in his throat for an instant right before release. The less weight in his veins, the higher he floated.
Among stars and sparkles.
Between fuzzy clouds and velvet.
Time lost all its crushing power. There was only room for a ‘now’ and it was as eternal as the lips that sucked his vital essence.
'Oh, take me far away...' Inupi thought. A hand clutching at his clothing. His own fingers tangled in silky black strands.
The vampire groaned too as he felt his mouth filled with blood.
Intertwined with Inupi's, other alien thoughts intruded. ‘You are delicious,’ they said. 'fuck, give me more…' But what could Inupi do? Just let him take more and more of him. And yes, he was loving it as he did.
Black dots danced through his vision. The weakness of anemia was beginning to assail him and it felt… insensitive, perfect. He was finally losing control over his mind and body. His legs were numb, unable to move, while his brain was tiredly diving in a sea of lights and gray dots. Drifting away from the material world.
Who could save him now?
Whose hand would descend from the skies and guide him with his light back to the world?
Back to time.
Back to life.
.
By the moment his pulse lost drive, his heart now slowed and erratic, the moist heat on his neck parted. A stroke of Baji's tongue closed his wounds at unnatural speed.
"I have to go, little prince." The deep voice whispered in his ear. “A dashing knight is coming for you right away and he's so fucking angry.”
Inupi didn't know what he meant. Nothing made sense. He just noticed how Baji was walking away, letting him levitate above the velvet. A wail passed his lips.
'Don’t go. Hold me in your arms before I fall.’ he wanted to say, still he couldn't get the words out of his mouth.
One last kiss on the back of his hand. Then solitude.
.
But solitude wasn't noiseless. A dispute was going on beyond the curtains. Few words reached his ears: … Rindo has told me… where is… if you dare… hand on…
He found it funny. Why would someone be so stressed? Why, when it was so pleasant to float between the colors that were reflected in the crystals of a chandelier…
"Oh shit…" a familiar voice cursed. Since it was no longer muffled by the endless curtains, Inupi knew they must be close. A swift figure approached him “fuck, fuck, Inupi, are you okay? Say something, anything!”
“Koko?” He groaned in confusion, wishing for the fog in his mind to dissolve. He managed to focus enough to recognize the face of the one who was gripping his shoulders and smiled as he realized he was right.
“What have you done, you fucking idiot?” Koko's eyes were filled with frustration and uneasiness. He immediately tried to hide it all against Inupi's chest. “Why…?”
Inupi, in the meantime, with his head in the clouds and the heat on his body, felt like nothing could stop him from saying out loud what was needed to say. There was no ice to walk on, only the person who always brought him back to life, so this time the words were easy to go:
“I love you, Koko.”