Chapter Text
Chapter 1: Lost and Insecure
It had been six months. Six whole months since her heart had been tore out and shattered into millions of pieces. Costia, Lexa's long term girlfriend had been tragically killed in car accident. The other driver barely made it out alive, but he survived and she didn't.
Lexa shut down, she could not function without her, she was lost and stuck in darkness with no clear path to find her way out. It seemed as if the darkness never ended.
Lexa had resorted to drinking her problems away hoping to find her answers at the bottom of the bottle, but it never seemed to help. She attended regular parties and drank Monday through to Sunday.
She was never able to remember the night before it was a blur and haze to her.
It helped momentarily. The drinking. But the pain always found away back in, never able to keep it at bay. Anything she ever did could extinguish the hurt she felt.
One night at a legendary Raven Reyes party Lexa had kissed another girl, random out of the blue, and it felt so wrong and foreign to her. Panic streamed through her as she sprinted away from the situation. She ran until she got to the place her heart always took her.
It was the edge of a cliff that looked over the beautiful night lit city. It was there she felt most at ease. She sat there fro a while, tears tumbled down her cheeks.
That night she promised to never love again. Hodness Laik Kwelness. Love is weakness. And her guard and walls around her shattered heart began to rise.
Since then Lexa was going to parties every weekend and purposefully always tried to get wasted. Her life was crumbling before her and she kept on falling. There was no stopping. No safety net. Not yet anyway.
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Clarke was a very serious girl. Was always the sensible one out of her friends, kind of the party pooper. She preferred to stay at home and draw instead of attend parties and get wasted with her friends, It just wasn't her scene.
Where as Raven, Octavia, Lincoln and Bellamy loved to party, they saw it as a way to release all the stress they had building up because of their studies. They couldn't understand why Clarke never joined them.
Clarke was studying to become a doctor, following in the footsteps of her mother, even though her passion was always art. She just wanted to make her mother proud and to finally accept her.
It was late one night and Raven rang Clarke to see if she wanted to come over to her house as she was throwing a party...again.
And to her own surprise instead of saying no she actually said yes.
She just needed to take her mind of things and for once she decided a good drink would do that.
What she didn't know that her life was about to change by going to this party.