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1 - one
When she thought about it, Yor noticed that there was something strange about Loid’s behavior.
It all started when they were still in their second year of high school in Eden. There was a yearly event where Loid was appointed the coordinator, and Yor acted as the manager. During every weekly meeting in the hall of the main auditorium, they sat next to each other—or rather, Loid would shoo whoever sat next to Yor, then proceed to sit cross-legged in that place until the meeting ended.
Their friends sneered, saying stuff along the line of ‘Loid, stop being so possessive!’ or ‘Yor, aren’t you bothered?’. Loid answered with a simple shrug, paying zero attention to them, and instead gave all his focus on the meeting. Yor, on the other hand, kept her mouth shut and refused to say any word at all. She felt a warm glow rise up her face, and she just knew that her cheeks were as red as her eyes.
In the fifth meeting, while everyone else was listening to the explanation from the secretary, Loid’s fingers suddenly landed on Yor’s knee. Her focus dispersed immediately—what was the name of their upcoming program for the library donation again?
With eyebrows raised in surprise, Yor whispered, “What are you doing, Loid?”
“Nothing. Just bored.” Loid replied casually.
For someone who was doing nothing, Loid’s long fingers sure were busy.
The same fingers tapped Yor’s knee several times; a different pause with each tap tap on her knee. At first, Yor thought Loid was drumming along to a song that was playing in his head. Or maybe Loid was too nervous because it would be his turn to submit his report soon.
Tap taap tap tap
A minute passed, and there was no sign that Loid would stop soon. However, Yor was way too familiar with all Loid’s quirks. She couldn’t be bothered when Loid kept on tapping—although to be honest, she lost her concentration there for a little bit.
Taap taap taap
2 – two
The strange tapping never stopped. In fact, the intensity increased over time. At this point, to be honest, Yor could care less about Loid’s tapping habit. Although sometimes she still had to glare and warn the 187-centimeter tall boy through her eyes, which were always greeted with a frown (but the tapping of his fingers never stopped, so if she was being honest, Yor was quite annoyed.)
It was during their university graduation ceremony that Yor thought about Loid’s peculiar habit again. Loid somehow managed to sneak to sit behind Yor, and she didn’t even bother to ask why because Loid wouldn't give her an answer. What Yor cared more about was Loid’s soft tap on her shoulder. It was out of nowhere and startled her—as she was falling asleep listening to their university chancellor's boring speech.
Tap tap tap taap
Yor couldn’t even count on two hands how many times had she asked “What are you doing?” but never got a definite answer. It was always just for fun, or should I stop?, or what Yor found the most annoying of all, a smirk. To be honest, it wasn't even that annoying, considering that when he was smirking like that, Loid’s eyes resembled a pair of crescent moons.
Cute.
When they were outside the auditorium to take pictures, there was another tap. This time it was on Yor’s waist, and Franky who was ordered by Loid to take a picture of them didn't see the small gesture at all. Glancing out of the corner of her eyes, Yor was greeted by Loid’s blinding smile, a sign that he was feeling good right now.
Yor couldn’t even say anything. Maybe the timing wasn't right to ask about the random tapping motion. There's still more time, she thought.
Tap
Right at the last tap, Loid idly landed a short kiss on the corner of her lips. Taken aback, Yor gasped then brought her hands to cover her face, refusing to show her blushing cheeks. Loid completely threw their previous pose plan to the air. They were supposed to be smiling at the camera with two fingers forming a peace sign. Meanwhile, Franky on the other side gave thumbs up while laughing.
“Right kiss at the right moment, lover boy!”
So, that was why their graduation photo looked like a young couple with overflowing hormones who didn’t hesitate to show off their affection in public. All because of Loid’s strange tap and the sudden kiss.
3 – three
Even though she had repeatedly been the object of Loid’s random tapping, Yor was still having trouble finding the pattern. Sometimes he did it like a taap tap taap taap, but a moment later it changed into taap taap taap.
The first hypothesis: it was just a reflex. The reason? Since they were a child, Loid had a lot of energy that sometimes he didn't know where to channel it. Maybe it was just his way of releasing energy in a healthier way.
The second hypothesis: Loid liked skinship. Physical touch meant a lot to him, and Yor kind of believed he needed to get enough physical touch every day to live life. At least, that’s how she saw it, being the one who received a lot of touching from Loid since.. since she didn’t even remember when.
There was one thing that never changed. Loid only did that weird tapping to Yor. On her thighs, stomach, arms—everywhere he could reach. Not even once had Yor seen Loid tap on the surface of a table or chair, or other people.
Both of her hypotheses were immediately dispelled when Yor realized this. Say, if it was simply a reflex, Loid would definitely do it on all surfaces and not just on her, right? And if it was just because Loid liked skinship, why was Yor his only target? There was Franky, for instance, yet Yor was a hundred percent sure Loid never does it to Franky.
“Loid, the light is green,” Yor reminded. She glanced at Loid’s hand which was still holding her palm, still doing random rhythmic tapping at the tip of each finger.
Loid blinked, "Oh, sorry," then returned his hands to the wheel, leaving Yor’s hands which for some reason, now felt colder.
+1 – plus one
What Yor thought was just a whim or an ordinary reflex—well, it could be more than that. After they got married, instead of stopping the random tap, Loid was tapping his finger more and more on every inch of Yor’s skin whenever he had the chance. A week ago, in the small area of Yor’s lower back when Loid helped her undress. Three days ago, on Yor’s forehead when she lost in an UNO game. Yesterday, on Yor’s cheek when they cuddled on the sofa, watching an animal documentary series on the TV.
Tap tap taap
Today, that strange rhythmic tapping came again on Yor’s wrist as she sat on the bed, leaning on the headboard while reading a book. Loid kept his eyes on the phone in his left hand, watching daily news on YouTube—something he always did before going to bed.
After years of silence and observation, Yor couldn't stand it if she didn't ask. No, she wasn't bothered at all; she’s used to it, even. However, the curiosity remained and it seems like tonight is the right time to ask.
"Loid, I have a question,"
"Wait a minute," Loid said, his hand then pressed pause on the phone screen and tilted his head so he could look at Yor carefully, "What is it?"
After placing her book and glasses on the nightstand beside the bed, Yor laid right next to Loid. Now, their faces were only a few centimeters apart, with their eyes fixed on each other, "What are you doing?" she asked.
"Eh? Watching news—”
Yor shook her head, “Not that, but this,” she said and then made Loid’s signature tapping motion on her husband's wrist. Just like what Loid did earlier, but with a distinctly different rhythm, because Yor was still not familiar with the pattern.
Loid blinked nervously. He didn't say anything, but his body immediately moved to trap Yor with his bigger figure. He placed his hands firmly on the side of Yor’s face, and his weight was on the knees which were now next to Yor’s legs.
"Answer me first," Yor whispered even though Loid was now above him. Loid usually wanted something more every time he towers over her like this. In short: no sleep, full of noise and sweat, and it would difficult for Yor to walk the next day.
Loid lowered his head, there was a gentle smile on his lips, and his eyes—gosh, his eyes. If Yor could exaggerate a little, she was so sure honey was dripping from his eyes. For a few seconds, Yor could only wait and see what Loid would do next.
"That's Morse code. I was a boyscout in elementary school," Loid admitted shyly. The tips of his ears turned red, and Yor almost exploded at that bashful confession.
What happened next was beyond Yor’s expectation. Before she could process his answer, Loid had bent down until his lips were right on Yor’s temple. He basically did the same thing with the tap of his fingers, but this time it was in the form of small pecks. The rhythm was exactly the same, and Yor was starting to guess the pattern and the gap between the kisses.
"That one means I..."
Then his kiss went down to the tip of Yor’s nose, raining kisses on her with a different rhythm again. Yor felt like she was dreaming because—what is this? She didn’t know whether Loid could hear it or not, but Yor’s heart was beating twice as fast as usual.
"Love.."
As if not satisfied, now the kisses reached her lips. Again with a different pattern. Every time Loid’s lips are not kissing her, Yor fought the urge to wrap around the man's neck and pull him back closer. Fortunately, Loid never kept them apart for long. Their kiss felt like a minute way too long, yet Yor didn't mind at all. Loid only pulled his face back when he felt Yor needed to take a breath.
“You,” he whispered right into Yor’s ear, landing the last kiss there.
Yor wouldn’t realize that her tears were already flowing down her cheeks if Loid didn't wipe the said tears, staring with wide eyes at Yor who was half sobbing.
From a long time ago, Loid had confessed his love in his own way. Repeatedly. He never stopped. Now, there are Loid’s fingerprints all over her body full of I love you I love you I love you. Yor couldn’t think of any word to describe the overflowing emotions she felt. There was just no word that exists to do it justice. The other half of Yor felt stupid because she didn’t realize it for years. There were way too many opportunities to reply to Loid’s silent confession, but she almost missed them all.
“Yor? Don’t cry!" Loid almost shouted in panic. He got up from his position so that he was next to Yor this time before pulling her into a hug, letting Yor sob into his chest.
Only after she calmed down that Yor dared to raise her head. Loid slowly wiped the tears off her cheeks with his thumb.
"Teach me." She asked hoarsely.
Loid reached for her hand, guiding Yor to do the same tapping motion. Yor chose to land her finger right on Loid’s chest, right where his heart is.
"I... love... you... is that so?" Yor asked hesitantly after finishing.
"That's right," Loid nodded. A small chuckle escaped his lips before he landed another short kiss on Yor’s lips, "I love you too."
.. / .–.. —– ...– . / –.— —– ..-
Tap tap / Tap taap tap tap taap taap taap tap tap tap taap tap / Taap tap taap taap taap taap taap tap tap taap.