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It was stinging like a thousand needles. Villanelle had blacked down immediately, mostly out of shock and less because of the pain itself. She could handle pain. She could not handle anxiety so well though. After waking up being placed in a hurry on a single bed, her eyes started to scan the room as much as possible. She realized she was there minutes before. Konstantin's ugly hotel room. The furniture. Horrendous.
Tears were accumulating on the corner of her eyes. What had happened?
"Wh- What happened?"
She couldn't see anyone. Laying on her belly, it was hard to look up. Her ears slowly stopped ringing. Cold air hit her skin when the fabric of her blouse was somehow gone.
"... insane! She needs a doctor!"
"She's got Pam, that's all we can afford right no-"
"There's a fucking arrow stuck on her back for fuck's sake!"
Villanelle's stomach churned.
"What?!"
Her mouth was wet and sticky, as if she was chewing glue, but her lips were dry. It was so fucking cold. An arrow? Did she hear it right? That voice...
"Eve?" Her voice sounded high pitched and interrupted whatever argument that was going on.
"Show her." That was Konstantin.
"I'm not- I'm not showing her anything. She'll freak out."
"Eeeeve?!"
Eve looked from Konstantin to Villanelle twice, her eyes wide and trying to focus as much as she could while feeling her heart racing in her chest. It was like having a clock ticking inside her head. Every move Pam would make to prepare herself to get the arrow out of Villanelle's back was a thud pounding on her ear. What if something went wrong? What if she had side effects from the medication? The wound. It had to heal perfectly, what if-
"EVE!"
"Show her." Konstantin insisted.
Eve crouched and her face filled Villanelle's sight.
"Uhn- Hi." Her brows were high up in her forehead, meeting in the middle. She looked like she couldn't decide whether it was better to smile or pout. "I don't want you to freak out, okay? But there's an arrow on your back right now. You were hit on the street and-" the more she spoke, the more Villanelle's despair grew stronger, her expression could tell. "Well, now we get to- remove it." She stopped for a beat to tuck blonde hair behind her ear. Villanelle tried to shake her head away, frowning. Eve's heart sank on her chest.
"I wanna see it." Villanelle mumbled.
"I told you." Konstantin sounded behind them.
"Shut up." Eve turned to face him and got up on her feet only to get a mirror from the wall to place it in front of Villanelle.
When she saw it, her blood ran colder. Eve saw Villanelle's eyes and how they grew twice their size.
"T-take it off me... Eve..."
"Calm down we-"
"TAKE IT OFF!!!"
-
Day turned to night. The only sound in the room was Villanelle low snoring in deep sleep. Pam had done a great job that Eve wasn't sure she was able to at first. Two taps on the shoulder and a "well done" was her way to apologize for the lack of trust.
She was alone in the room, watching Villanelle from afar. Sitting on a large armchair, she couldn't take her eyes off of her back peacefully moving up and down in her breathing. Messy hair still tied into a bun. Lips slightly apart, showing bits of her teeth. This last detail had Eve smiling through the tears that wouldn't stop from falling. When she noticed Villanelle's attempt to move, she quickly wiped her tears away and got up just to kneel in front of the bed.
"Hey..."
Villanelle didn't say anything. Her eyes didn't meet Eve's.
"Are you alright?"
No words. Only a roll of her eyes.
"Do need anything?"
Eve reached for her hand, but Villanelle hid it away before there was a touch.
Eve had placed an opened flannel shirt over Villanelle so she could warm up a little. It was lighter than a blanket, so it wouldn't be uncomfortable over the wound.
Villanelle tried to stand her torso by holding her weight with a hand pressed flat on the mattress. Eve motioned to stop her.
"Don't." She was still avoiding Eve's eye contact. Finally she managed to sit down. Her arm barely covered her chest. The pain wasn't coming just from the freshly stitched cut. Her whole body was aching and, as much as she didn't want to admit it over and over again, her feelings were crushed to the ground.
The shirt slipped on the bed behind her. The room's air caused goosebumps on her fair skin.
"Here." Eve poured water and handed the glass to Villanelle, who took it with a look in her eyes that was clearly saying " I'm just thirsty, that's the only reason I'm accepting your help."
It was fine by Eve, if she were to be honest, as long as Villanelle got better. She couldn't bear any more guilt inside. She needed to make sure Villanelle was recovering well.
"It's all my fault", she couldn't stop thinking. "It's all my fucking fault. How could I be so selfish and so blind and-"
Villanelle's voice took her out of her own mind.
"Where's Konstantin?"
"He's out with Pam to buy us food and- medical supplies. They'll be back in an hour or less."
Villanelle shook her head in understanding and placed the empty glass on the nightstand.
Eve felt her throat clenching, holding a sob, the tears were falling down her cheeks without her consent. Her jaw was hurting. She wiped her face again and wet her lips.
"I- do you-"
Villanelle looked up to only then meet Eve's eyes.
"You locked me up."
Eve nodded. Her chin was trembling.
"You left me." Her own eyes started tearing up with those harsh words. Eve nodded again.
"You didn't mind that I was alone inside a padded cell with my arms tied up."
A single teardrop ran down. The room got quiet for a few seconds.
"I thought..." Eve swallowed hard. "I thought that, by locking you away, I would be able to move on, to not- feel what I was feeling. I-" she took a deep breath. "It didn't work. And then... Then I saw you out there. I- I thought I had lost you."
"So what?"
"I didn't like it." She had to clean her face with her blouse sleeve. "I didn't like it at all. I-"
"So putting me imprisoned was fine, but seeing me dead would cause you so much pain."
Eve could feel the rage in her voice. No. No, not the rage. It was a grudge.
"What am I to you, a fucking bird in a cage? Hm? A doll in a toy-house? A trapped mouse?"
Silence.
Another single tear.
"I might be the notorious cold blood assassin but you, Eve, you are worse than me.
Eve frowned.
"What?"
"You played me as you pleased and I'm not sticking around to-"
"Hey!"
Villanelle tried to get up and failed. Eve's hands were holding her in a blink of an eye, keeping her sat.
"You're not going anywhere."
"Don't touch me!" When dodging Eve's hands, she twisted her waist and received a sharp pain in return. Her eyes shut and she yelled.
"Wh-what happened?" Eve got up to see her gauze. It was getting redder by the second. "Shit, we need to change it. I- you-"
She then caught Villanelle's arm and placed it around her own neck, trying to lift her up the bed.
"What are you doing?"
"You're going to shower."
"I don- Eve, I don't wanna shower."
"You sound like a whiny child."
Villanelle huffed and tried to complain again but she didn't have the strength to fight Eve on that. She sat on a small wooden chair while Eve prepared the bathtub with hot water.
"Can you get up?"
They were both standing. Villanelle had given up covering herself up by then. Her bare chest was inches away from Eve. It would be a damn lie to say Eve's eyes didn't travel in that direction, but she was trying really hard to be completely respectful, given the circumstances. And took all of her will to keep calm and collective when she leaned to take Villanelle's pants off. The woman, surprisingly, did not make a move, if not for two steps back when the pair fell on her feet.
When Eve's fingers carefully held the hem of her underwear, Villanelle felt her abdomen contract. The fabric was pulled down slowly. Eve took a second or two to take in what was in front of her. Her heart skipped a beat and she felt… something.
Eve carefully removed the bandage and cleaned the wound with a wet cotton pad, just enough to not run down Villanelle's back.
"Can you-"
"Yeah."
Eve helped Villanelle to get in the bath. She noticed she was secretly thankful for the feeling of the warm water and hot steam involving her. Villanelle took a deep breath with her eyes closed for a bit. It had been a weird and painful day.
There was a washcloth and a soap bar that Eve brushed together below the water.
"Can I?" She whisperly asked, receiving a not-so-sure nod.
Eve cleaned Villanelle's arms, then her legs and feet, her back. She took a little longer there, pouring water over so it could clean the wound without any friction.
Only the small splashes of water could be heard. Eve's touch was so attentive and unbelievably caring, it was impossible for Villanelle to not ler herself go for a while. It was all happening in slow motion, like a movie. Not in her wildest dreams she thought something like that would happen one day.
Eve sat on the bathtub's edge to clean Villanelle's face. Her eyes twitched in a funny way and she wrinkled her nose, almost child-like. Eve caught herself smiling at that. Her hand traveled to the woman's neck, to her chest. The tip of her fingers moving from the left to the right on the wet skin, her eyes following them. She saw Villanelle's chest moving in a heavier breath motion.
"The water-"
Her voice awoke Eve and she retreated her hand.
"The water is getting cold."
"Oh! Right, sure. Let's get you out of there."
-
Villanelle demanded to finish everything herself, needing Eve's help for one thing or two. She'd never ask, but Eve was there right away to dry her back and place a clean gauze and bandage.
To be able to put on her borrowed shirt, she sat on the bed. It was hard to move, the painkillers and antibiotics were sure to help and she had been through worse situations before, but it didn't mean it didn't hurt like a bitch.
She was halfway, trying to fit her left arm on the long sleeve, when Eve leaned forward to help again, gently tidying the blouse. Sitting back on the edge of the other bed, she fixed the collar with both hands, inspecting as if she was dressing a model or something. That's when she noticed. Villanelle was not simply looking at Eve.
She was staring. Hypnotized. Glassy eyes. Lips parted. A slight expression of doubt, or maybe confusion?
Eve stopped and held the gaze. Doing the same. Memorizing every single tiny detail of that face. Her voice sounded low and raspy.
"God, you're so beautiful."
Her hands moved up, from the collar to Villanelle's face. Her fingers in an almost ghost touch moved a few strands of hair away from her eyes and cheeks.
"You're so beautiful." Eve repeated. "And I'm such a fool."
Her index traced a line from her temple to her jawline to a few birth marks on her neck.
"You have no idea how sorry I am. For everything." Her eyes were fixed at Villanelle's ones. "I truly am." It was fucking hard to hold back her cry, but she managed it. "I thought I could- erase everything from my mind. Obliviate. Kill you inside me and be a new person, a new version. 2.0." She left a bitter laugh out. "But that was just foolishness."
Eve cupped Villanelle's face, who let a gasp escape at the touch.
She remembered the day in her kitchen.
She remembered Paris and Rome and that stupid bridge.
"Your face was there. Like always. After waking up, before going to bed, in my dreams. I couldn't escape. When I bought a leather jacket I thought 'hm, I think she'd like this one' ."
That last bit made Villanelle shyly corner-smile.
"But I denied myself. Over and over and over. I denied you."
"Why?"
"'Cause I was fucking scared."
"Are you scared now?"
Eve nodded and wet her lips.
"Yes... But not like that."
"Like what then?"
"I'm fucking terrified of losing you."
At that, she changed seats, moving to the other bed, next to Villanelle, holding her face with both hands, getting closer, and closer. So close her breath tickled Eve's skin. It felt warm and good. And right. When their lips touched, God, it felt so right . She remembered the first time. It was so awkward and random and confusing and good . And it lasted so little, but she felt that sensation for days hovering on her lips. And now, again, but somehow softer, better. Deeper. She wanted to deepen the kiss and so she did when Villanelle fully opened her mouth. Breathing out. Waiting. Needing for more.
Their tongues touched, tasting each other, and they kissed until Eve had to stop after hearing Villanelle's gasp muffled by her mouth.
"Are you okay?" She asked, afraid that the wound was bleeding again.
Villanelle was breathless and smiling.
"Yeah."
She led her hand to the back of Eve's neck, holding those gorgeous curls, and pulled her face back to another kiss.
She had dreamed about those full lips for so long and there they were, giving in, desperate to fit years of desire into seconds.
Eve sucked Villanelle's bottom lip and boldly started to distribute wet kisses on her jaw and neck. An idea popped in her mind and made her body shiver.
"I could..."
"What?" Villanelle whispered, finding Eve's mouth again.
"I could..." she said between kisses. "Help you with the pain, you know? Make you- forget about it."
They locked eyes again.
"Would you like that?" Eve asked, caressing Villanelle's face so kindly it made Villanelle question if heaven truly existed at last.
"Yeah..." The answer was nothing but a soft breath.
"Yeah? Okay."
At that point, Eve was basically following her instincts. No worries, no complications, no Twelve, no past or future or nothing. She needed to make Villanelle feel good, to feel taken care of.
Eve placed a few pillows on the bed and helped Villanelle to lay down there.
"Is it comfortable?" Villanelle nodded in affirmation. "Good." She propped herself with her knees on the mattress, between Villanelle's legs, and just looked at her for a brief moment. Her eyes were more honey than any shade, her swollen lips and flustered cheeks. The blouse was wide open and she allowed herself to look this time. Round perfect breasts on display with hardened nipples begging for attention.
"You like what you see?"
Her face showed tiredness and not a sign of that old cockiness, but Eve found it cute her attempt to joke around anyway. She leaned forward and kissed her softly before answering.
"Very much."
"You know, I'm not always this sexy. Don't get used to it."
Eve laughed and couldn't help but kiss her for the tenth time. That taste... How could someone taste this good? It was absolutely not fair.
Her kisses found a new path, going down to the valley of her breasts. Her hands cupped them so deliciously tight, Villanelle bit her own lip and almost arched her back, forgetting completely about the pain. "Make you forget about it." It was really working.
"Shhh… You can't move like that, be careful."
That phrase felt so controversial being said right before Eve's mouth covered one of Villanelle's nipples, moving her tongue on and around it. Eve moaned against her skin. Goddamn it, she was so, so soft. Villanelle bit her lip a bit harder. How could she possibly expect to lay down still when her body was so electric?
After giving both tits the same attention, Eve's eyes laid on the fine rosy scar next to Villanelle's waist. She traced it and looked back at her. That soft smile was there again.
"I'm proud of this one."
"I'm sorry." She kissed the skin and repeated those words three times.
"I know."
Her hands slid down through Villanelle's body, from waist to hips.
"Do you think you can move just a little bit for me?"
Well, how could Villanelle say no? Even if she had a bullet ingrown, she'd do it. For Eve.
Villanelle was so frustrated though. She wanted to be able to really move, to hold Eve, pin her against the wall and do all the things she'd fantasized. But could not, for the love of God, complain about how she was being treated.
"Eve..."
"Is this okay?"
"Hm..." She nodded.
"Do you want me to stop?" She asked, moving her fingers below the hem of her pants.
"No."
"Would you care to spread a little more, please?"
Villanelle parted her legs a little wider and Eve grinned. She felt how damped the fabric was and fucking hell , that alone made her own center ache. Sitting next to Villanelle, she used one hand to caress her breast and the other got inside her panties.
Eve's fingers started to touch her, collecting all of that wetness and spreading it around. It made Villanelle gasp and open her mouth, just to be surprised with another kiss, sloppier and more intense. She could swear that moment was happening only inside her head. It was Eve's first time doing that, and yet, it felt like the most natural thing.
Villanelle moaned inside Eve's mouth. That sensation was unlike anything she'd ever felt before. Her legs and knuckles tensed and she heard Eve telling her to relax, with her mouth still on hers, never leaving.
Please, never stop, she thought.
"I want to feel you… you know, inside."
"Oh God..."
"Can I-"
" Yes !"
Eve coated two fingers between Villanelle's sticky folds and it took all of her focus to not come so fast when they filled her in, knuckles deep.
"Fuck!"
She felt their length sliding in and out, going a bit faster with every thrust - gently enough to not cause her indirect pain, intense enough to make her come.
Eve's kisses on her neck made her whole body tremble. She had her forehead frowned and eyes shut.
"Look at me, V."
She did.
"Is it hurting?"
Villanelle shook her head as a "no".
"Does if feel good then?" Her voice sounded so sweet.
Villanelle bit her lip again and nodded as a "yes".
Her hand went to Eve's curls at the same time Eve caressed her cheeks and tug a strand of hair behind her ear. She noticed she liked doing that.
Weak fingers were holding on among strands of dark hair. Eve retreated her digits from Villanelle's count and started to move circles around her clit, praying she was doing everything right.
It feels right , she thought once more.
"Yes... Right there."
"Are you feeling okay?"
Villanelle didn't say a word. Her jaw dropped so beautifully and she nodded. Eve nibbled her lower lip and placed a soft kiss on that opened mouth.
"You're doing great. You're doing so great. Look at me." She commanded, cupping her face.
Villanelle was a mixture of gratitude and dispair when she started to rock her hips a little bit, pleading for more.
"Don't move, V, don't move. Do you need more? Hum? Faster?"
"Yes..."
That moaning voice was sending pulses to Eve's aching clit. She wished so bad she had a way to seek for release...
But no, this was Villanelle's moment. She focused on her moves, delivering a faster pace as she was asked. The tip of her fingers gliding on slick sensitive skin. Villanelle was going completely insane with that. When Eve added a little bit more of pressure, she lost control.
"Yes… Ah !"
A loud, sharp, husky moan echoed through the room. Eve was in awe watching her reaching orgasm like that, her hand still moving, feeling her wrist burn. Vilanelle melted on her fingers while holding Eve's hair and the sheets for dear life.
Out of words to describe that moment, Eve thought of a few words. Sublime stood out.
She didn't want it to end, feeling a sort of guilt building up on the pit of her stomach for waiting so long for that.
Villanelle relaxed and Eve was about to take her fingers out when a hand stopped her.
"Leave It... A bit more."
Eve smiled, nodded and kissed Villanelle's breathless mouth.
She was kissing Villanelle. She had just felt Villanelle. Her hand was there, warm and sticky.
"How is the pain?"
"What pain?"
They both smiled. Breathing was starting to hurt a bit, but she wouldn't say anything to ruin the moment. That orgasm ended up being everything she needed to calm down, to forget that awful day and all the things that have been consuming her mind lately. The heavy meds did their job as well.
"I'm okay. I'm... Wow." She breathed out. "I'm-"
"Leaking."
Villanelle laughed. "Well, that's on you, 'cause-"
"No, your wound is leaking again."
"Uhn- Oh."
Eve took her fingers out of Villanelle and before she could step away from the bed, Villanelle held her hand next to her face. Their eyes met. There was a sort of fire in them, despite everything they had been through. Even physically hurt - or precisely because of that - Villanelle was craving Eve's touch and attention.
She put her fingers inside her mouth and sucked them clean as slowly as she could.
Eve smirked and shook her head.
"You little shit." Villanelle found that tone of her voice extremely sexy, if she were to be honest. "You're bleeding."
"I tend to do that a lot." She said, dropping Eve's hand after one last, temptive lick. "I'll pay you back, I promise."
"You better."
Was it her way to accept Eve's apologies? Were they going to be alright? They were powder and fuse together, always have been, ready to explode. But maybe, just maybe, they could create fuel instead of mess. Light, instead of blackouts. Maybe they could… Just be.
May be.
-
Eve helped Villanelle to finish getting dressed after changing her gauze once more. There were a few laughs this time and a sort of tenderness, which was kind of new. Or renewed.
She was on the last button of her checked shirt when Konstantin and Pam got back.