Chapter Text
People are not born equal.
It’s something that Izuku learned from a young age and fully understood after he turned 10.
Soulmates came around shortly after the birth of quirks. Like quirks, they were completely unexpected and new. It was something that was exciting for a lot of people, to have someone that they were going to be with forever, to have someone made for them.
From what Izuku had researched, there were only 5 cases where people didn’t have soulmates, there was never any reason that was found as to why they didn’t have soulmates, but they simply didn’t. These cases also cropped up shortly after soulmates started appearing.
But since quirks came first and soulmates came after, Izuku also had to look into those statistics. He needed to see if his former quirklessness affected those numbers, which, from his research, it didn’t. There hadn’t been a case of someone not having soulmates in hundreds of years, so the information wasn’t the most up to date. But, that should’ve been good for him, right?
Well, age 10 came and went, then age 11, age 12… 13… and on and on. Years kept passing by and Izuku had never felt anything from his soulmate. The people in his middle school knew before he did.
Izuku was always full of hope though, he always looked for the best, he always tried to hold onto hope. But time was slowly draining away and Izuku had finally faced the truth that he didn’t have a soulmate.
Still, Izuku found himself apologizing to his non-existent soulmate.
The first time was when he was 14, breathing halted by the sludge villain as he struggled, trying to pry the villain away and save himself. In those moments, he thought out an apology to his soulmate, to say sorry that they were probably getting one hell of a headache right now.
Then, All Might saved him and all was well again. The sense of danger would have dissipated from his soulmate and they’d be feeling fine for the most part.
And as tragic and horrible as it might’ve been, some nights Izuku laid there staring at the ceiling and hoping that his soulmate would get caught in some sort of villain attack, that they would be in danger, just so he could feel that tug on his anxiety, or a little shred of panic. Just so he could feel a sliver of emotions that weren’t his own.
It was something that was almost welcoming for him.
But it never came.
Time passed and there was never that pull, there was never that foreign feeling in his head of someone sharing their emotions with him.
Which led to him diving headfirst into any sort of medical book that discussed soulmates, reading posts from academics who would tell the way that the pull was supposed to feel, literally anything. Those words were his solace in the world that he was apparently alone in.
Still, as years passed and as his world changed, he kept his head up and kept apologizing to his made up soulmate.
He had a quirk now, which Izuku thought was good, because at least he wasn’t as defected as he initially thought. Or at least something of the sense because as much as One for All was his it also… wasn’t. It was the vestiges as well as his, it was a team effort of 8 and a half (mainly because All Might was still alive and couldn’t converse with the other vestiges, so he was the half).
Things got better, Izuku achieved his dream, he became a hero.
That was what mattered to him more than anything else, because at least how he could help people, and he had friends and was happy.
So yeah, things have definitely gotten better.
“Nerd! Stop fucking staring into space, I’m trying to scold you about overworking yourself!” Kacchan yelled at him impatiently, making Izuku’s attention snap back onto his best friend.
That was one of the biggest things that had changed.
After Kamino and after Ground Beta, they had become something of rivals, something that slowly morphed into them being best friends. Kacchan and him always pushed each other, they always tried to one up each other too. It was good for work.
And, one of his favorite things about Kacchan was that he didn’t talk about soulmates with Izuku. Part of Izuku thought it was because he was scared of it, that he didn’t want to approach a topic that he used to bully him over despite apologizing and making up for it in a variety of ways.
But Izuku enjoyed it, he enjoyed not hearing his best friend talk about whoever his soulmate was, whether he got his mark or not, when his soulmate was in danger and for how long.
He felt a bit selfish, really. Especially because he was slightly jealous of Kacchan’s soulmate, because eventually, when they would find each other, they would be the luckiest person in the world.
“Sorry, Kacchan.” He smiled sheepishly as his leg bounced nervously on the floor, “And I haven’t been overworking! I’m just working 80 to 90 hours a week! That’s only 47.62 to 53.57% of my week! That means I have 78 to 88 hours a week to do whatever I want!” he defended himself, knowing that it probably wouldn’t help his case.
A year after graduating UA and with the help of Miruko and Hawks, he and Kacchan were able to open their own agency together. Both of them being co-owners and runners of the agency while balancing actual hero work on top of it.
Izuku never regretted it for a second though, even if Kacchan did pull him into his office to yell at him every other day because he did something stupid or because he was working overtime too much which was a thing for “sidekicks and heroes that don’t run a fucking agency,” as Kacchan would say.
But it was more than okay because Izuku did the same thing, pulling Kacchan into his office to yell at him over damage reports when he did over the HPSC’ allowance of 5% or to yell at him for getting behind on paperwork.
They helped each other as much as they pushed each other, it was a good thing, and it made Izuku happy.
Kacchan glared at him. “Well, if you are working 90 hours a week and then also sleeping the 8 hours a night that you're supposed to, that means you only have 22 hours to do whatever the fuck you want,” he said, as a dangerous smile made it’s way across his lips, “And I know you like to spend 2 hours at the gym every day, so that’s another 14 hours gone, which would leave you with only 8 hours every week to shower, or read, or cook. Any of the things that you should be fucking doing instead of working. Like relaxing, when was the last time you fucking relaxed Deku? Or took a day off?” he asked as he shook his head.
Izuku’s cheeks flushed as the blond went on and on, listing off everything that he should be doing. And while the numbers should have worked out to be true, Izuku knew that it wasn’t. Mostly because he was lucky if he got 5 hours of sleep a night, and most of the time he spent at home was working on longer cases and more extensive cases. Or sometimes he wouldn’t even go home, instead going to Shinsou’s apartment (which was luckily next door) to de-stress by playing with his cat or holding Mr. Meow Meow and crying.
His schedule was by no means the healthiest thing ever, but it worked for him, it made him feel better. It took his mind off of anything that could’ve actually harmed his mental health, and that’s what was important, wasn’t it?
But with the way that Kacchan was worriedly glaring at him, he wasn’t feeling so convinced with his previous dismissals and explanations that he had crafted to rationalize his actions to himself.
“It’s okay, Kacchan, really,” he said softly, not wanting to get into any sort of verbal argument with the other that would end up in him revealing way too much about his unhealthy coping habits.
The blond shook his head and sighed, “I can’t suspend you or shit like that, you just have to fucking be careful. We can’t let Japan’s symbol of hope burn out before he even turns 21.” It was supposed to sound like a joke, but all Izuku could hear was the truth in the statement.
While he hadn’t lived up to All Might’s title of ‘Symbol of Peace’, he had accidentally crafted his own title, one that had been following up the charts since before he even graduated from UA.
Izuku bit the inside of his cheek before nodding, knowing damn well that if Kacchan was the hero in charge fully, that he would’ve sent Izuku home for who knows how long to just ‘rest’, which would mean him just spending multiple days in Shinsou’s apartment with Mr. Meow Meow and occasionally going back to his own apartment.
“I’ll be careful, Kacchan,” he said softly, biting the inside of his cheek as he spoke. He glanced at the time, relaxing a bit when he realized that they were both scheduled to go on patrol soon.
It was a bit of a tradition for them. While most of their patrols would be without the other, once a week they went on a joint patrol to catch up. During their joint patrols there was only one rule; no arguing.
See, while things had gotten better between them, Izuku knew that they both still lacked in the whole communication department. That was made alarmingly clear in third year when they got in a verbal argument while at lunch that turned into them making a deal to be sidekicks at Miruko’s agency for a year before opening their own.
Izuku was more than okay with that fight as well as their various other ones, because at least that meant they were communicating.
Kacchan rolled his eyes. “Better fucking be, I’m not going to file another fucking incident report because of your annoying ass getting sent to the hospital again,” he bit out, like Izuku was going to the hospital every day.
Which he wasn’t, it was maybe twice a month at most, and most of it was for concussions or minor lacerations; it hadn’t been anything big in a while.
Actually, in all honesty, the last big injury that he had gotten was when a villain stabbed his kidney while they were still working under Miruko.
The last time that he was in the hospital though was when his appendix burst, but there was no way to prove that it was from any sort of villain fight, so Izuku was saved by Kacchan’s scolding with that fact.
“Patrol time?” Izuku asked, a bit like an excited puppy. The blond rolled his eyes before standing up and nodding.
“You bet your ass it’s patrol time, but we’re taking the rooftops so you can rest a little, fuckface,” Kacchan said roughly as he pushed past Izuku, probably to go grab his gauntlets since he wasn’t wearing them in his office.
Izuku got out of his seat, a small smile on his face as he watched Kacchan disappear into the stairwell.
To an outsider, their interactions would look rough and maybe even a bit forced, but Izuku knew that the blond cared for him, that he worried about him, that he wouldn’t take precious time out of his day to do the math to try and make sure Izuku was taking care of himself. It was sweet, really.
His heart squeezed painfully when he remembered that despite the fact that he found it sweet, despite the fact that he enjoyed those small things, he knew that once Kacchan found his soulmate things would change.
Izuku was a hopeless romantic through and through, which was probably attributed to the fact that he spent years pouring over any and every fact he could about soulmates and romance.
He just… enjoyed love even if he wasn’t ever going to experience it in a way that most other people were.
Of course, there were the few people who simply didn’t care for a soulmate, or those who mutually looked at their soulmate as a best friend perfect for him. And there were, sadly, the select people with faded and colored completed soulmarks, marking that at some point, their soulmate had passed away.
There was a chance for Izuku to find love someday, but as he was striving to be the number one hero, that day certainly wouldn’t come. So instead he lived in a state of craving romance and feeding that craving with shitty romance movies late at night and other cute books or manga, just so he could feel that pull at his emotions and his heartstrings.
It was going to be nothing compared to falling in love for the first time, but he was okay with that, because at least it helped him cope for now.
Being a hero was more important for him, succeeding in that was what he really wanted to do.
He waited for Kacchan by the elevator on their floor, tapping a finger against his arm as he waited. Some might see that as a sign of impatience, but Izuku just needed to keep his damaged hands occupied, that's all.
As soon as he saw the blond, he hit the button for the elevator to go down, a wide smile on his face. "Are you excited for patrol, Kacchan?" he asked with a hum as his friend got closer.
Kacchan merely grunted in indifference before he entered the elevator, Izuku following after him happily.
Most of their patrol was quiet, it always was whenever both of them were out. It was a point of pride for them. While villains wouldn’t be as scared to show their faces or do crime while one of them was on patrol, whenever both were out in the same area, they seemed to be deterred.
Izuku had once suggested that they do patrol together more often, but Kacchan had denied, saying that if they started doing it all the time, it wouldn’t have the same effect. Izuku found himself agreeing when it was put like that.
As they stood at the top of the building, eating their convenience store onigiri, he hummed and looked at Kacchan. “Have you felt anything from your soulmate recently?” he asked curiously.
The blond rarely talked about his soulmate and whatever they were up to, but Izuku didn’t really mind. In fact, he thought that it was a bit sweet that he wouldn’t talk about soulmates when he was around. It meant that not only did Kacchan understand that it was a sensitive topic for him, but also that he cared for Izuku in a way.
Kacchan halted his actions for a moment next to him, halfway through a bite. It took only another half second before he resumed his actions, scoffing a bit. “Doesn’t fucking matter, I’m too damn busy to deal with that shit right now. Need to beat your ass and get to number one first,” he said, almost sounding a bit fond.
Izuku smiled to himself, hiding it behind his food before taking a bite. “Just be nice when you meet them, okay, Kacchan?” he said softly, a small pang in his heart.
It was tragic, really, that the one person that Izuku could ever see himself falling for was fated for someone else.
He bit the inside of his cheek a little, shaking the disappointment off of himself. Whenever they did talk about soulmates, no matter how rarely, it was always like this. Kacchan would say something about not wanting to talk about it, and for a fraction of a second, Izuku would get happy. He’d let himself believe that maybe, possibly, Kacchan could care about him. Then, in a bitter way he’d remember that Bakugou Katsuki was literally fated to be with anyone else but him.
Through and through, no matter what his accomplishments are and what he’s done for the people; he’s still just a Deku.
***
Katsuki knew something was wrong by the time he was 13 and he had yet to feel an ounce of danger from his soulmate. At first he thought that his soulmate might’ve even died, but then there would be some sort of sign, wouldn't there? He wouldn’t just be wandering the fucking world waiting for someone who was never show up, right?
But as time passed, it still seemed possible.
A small part of him thought that when he was taken by the League during his first year at UA, that whoever the fuck his soulmate was would feel the danger and would see the news and connect the dots, that they’d start worrying and feel a bit of danger themselves. But nothing ever came of it.
At first, Katsuki minded that a lot. He minded the fact that he might not have a soulmate, that he was somewhat on the same level of Deku, that they were both just a little fucked up in the same way. But he also found solace in that fact, because then at least he wasn’t alone and he had someone else that was going through the same thing.
Not that he’d ever say anything along those lines of course. He’d fake it until he made it, he’d pretend he had a soulmate and they simply decided to live apart if it meant never having to admit that he didn’t.
And of course, he didn’t mind for another reason too.
That reason had emerald green eyes, enough freckles to make a whole new universe, and the brightest smile in the world even when he was down.
Not that he’d ever admit that either.
When they were younger, he thought that one day Deku might’ve ended up being his soulmate, but then after they got into UA, he saw differently.
As kids, they were always glued next to each other, until he got his quirk of course. Then, his treatment of Deku turned into something ugly and twisted, something that he regretted deeply and would regret for the rest of his life.
And even when they weren’t friends anymore, he was still drawn to Deku.
But during their time at UA, seeing how Deku put himself in danger for everyone else, seeing how he’d always get himself hurt the most, Katsuki never once felt even a twinge of danger.
He remembered being crowded around the TV watching the Overhaul fight with the rest of his peers, watching Deku destroy his body over and over again for the sake of Eri and feeling nothing but horror that whole time. Even the migraine that he had been having all week faded to the background because Deku, his friend rival, was in danger.
Katsuki wouldn’t ever admit that though, either. He wouldn’t admit anything that he felt towards Deku because it was easier that way, and because he didn’t know how he felt at all himself.
Starting their agency together was good though, it gave him a chance to stay close to his now best friend and keep him in line without seeming too overbearing, and it allowed him to take care of Deku when needed.
There were far too many times when Katsuki would take the short walk to Deku’s apartment from his small condo and end up using his key to get inside and clean up or make food while the nerd was next door or asleep.
Whenever Katsuki went over, Deku would always come in the next day with cookies or some other baked goods that had just a little too much sugar or chocolate and thank Katsuki.
Going over there all those times was worth those smiles that Deku had the next day and the many thank you’s that he had received.
He looked over the small area of Tokyo that he can see from his position on the roof, legs dangled over the edge while Deku laid next to him, a content smile on his face and his eyes closed, just taking in the sun.
Katsuki feels lucky at times like these, to have a best friend like this and to be able to do the thing he loved most with him.
If Katsuki ever thought about hero work realistically, he would know that Deku would hit first before him, not that Katsuki minded anymore. But it was still nice to try and pretend like it mattered, like he’d be the littlest bit angry at the nerd if he hit number one before Katsuki did.
He smiled a bit as he looked at his best friend, their earlier conversation about soulmates still fresh in his head.
Sometimes, he wishes that he could manifest the energy and the will to tell Deku that he didn’t have a soulmate too, that they were in this together and that it was okay. But whenever he went to say those things, he found himself at a loss for words, unable to get anything even close to them out.
So instead he acted standoffish about it, instead he acted like he didn’t have time for it and that it didn’t currently matter to him, and Deku would believe it. And if Deku would believe it, that meant that everyone would believe it.
Katsuki moved fully back onto the roof and stretched. “C’mon nerd, let's go back and do some paperwork,” he said as he clapped a hand on his hero partner's shoulder, letting him know it was time to go.
Deku stirred next to him before begrudgingly getting up and humming a bit. “I’m sorry,” he whispered just loud enough for Katsuki to hear, causing the blond to send him a confused look.
“What the fuck for? You didn’t do shit wrong.” He rolled his eyes a little as he looked at the other, confused about what the nerd could possibly be apologizing for now.
“Earlier, when I brought up your s-word,” Deku continued before Katsuki laughed loudly at the use of ‘s-word’ to mean soulmate.
He stopped walking before he turned around and placed his hands on Deku’s shoulder, squeezing them softly. “I don’t care, it’s fine. I’m not mad at you or any of that shit either, you asked a fucking question okay? It’s not like you were there trying to shove down my throat that I need to pay attention to my soulmate right now or anything. So don’t sweat it, nerd. You’re getting all anxious over nothing,” he reassured, his voice quiet despite the harsh language.
Deku looked up at him, taking a small breath before nodding a bit. “Yeah, okay, thank you, Kacchan.” He smiled before pulling away from the position they were in and walking away, Katsuki trailing after him.
The rest of the walk back to the agency was quiet, but Katsuki didn’t really mind it. He simply walked next to Deku, sometimes hiding a small smirk on his face when he realized that they were finally side by side, that no one was in front of the other anymore.
They were heroes together, and that made Katsuki so fucking happy.
Doing paperwork together, now that was a drag.
He didn’t mind it, hell, he didn’t even mind reading over Deku’s paperwork before they submitted it. But it was the most boring part of being a hero and because he and Deku ran an agency together, they had even more paperwork.
Usually, an agency would hire someone to do the paperwork for them. They’d have some sort of very basic form to fill out and then the person that did the paperwork would use that as well as any footage that they found on the internet in order to fill out the reports.
But, because of Deku’s specific delicacy with One for All and trying to keep some of those quirks quiet, they both decided that doing it like this would simply be easier and more safe for the both of them.
In turn that meant that the paperwork was damn near overwhelming some of the time, especially as it started getting closer to tourist season.
Katsuki didn’t even realize when it happened, he didn’t even know until he was looking at a paper and thought he dumbly spilt ink on his arm somehow. In fact, he almost laughed at himself because he didn’t know just how the fuck he ended up doing that, but then, he saw the detail in the ink.
It was a tattoo, half completed but still staring him in the face.
A tattoo that meant that he had a soulmate, one that meant he was destined to be with someone.
Someone that wasn't his best friend.
He stared at the flower that was on his forearm, his breath hitching in his throat as he just stared at it. Katsuki didn’t want it to be true, he didn’t want it to be there. He was happy, didn’t the universe understand that?
Or maybe it had something against Deku and him because whenever they were happy, it always seemed more than happy to fuck them over.
Katsuki moved to stand up, his knees shaking just a bit as he used the desk for support, walking to the door to go to Shitty Hair’s office.
He felt sick to his stomach, whether it was in excitement of actually having a soulmate, anxiousness of actually having a soulmate, or disappointment with the whole situation, he couldn’t say.
Only a few steps out of his office, he realized that he probably shouldn’t be walking around with half of a soulmark just out for the world to see. He yanked his compression gloves for his costume out of his pocket and slipped both of them on, nodding to himself before starting the walk down a level to get to Kirishima’s office.
On the way there, he stumbled into an intern or two, and one of the newer sidekicks, and Deku, because of course he’d stumble into Deku.
“Kacchan?” the green haired nerd asked as he frowned, holding Katsuki’s biceps gently to try to center him. “Hey, are you okay? Did something happen?” The question was soft as he spoke, concern seeping into his tone.
If Katsuki were a little more competent with feelings and a little more lenient on letting himself feel them, he might have cried.
“I’m okay,” he breathed out, sounding not convincing at all. “I’m okay, Deku,” he said again, before he noticed the fact that Deku was still in his hero costume, just standing there. “You’re going back out?”
Deku’s cheeks flushed as he brought a hand to rub on his nape, laughing shakily. “I have a double shift today, Kacchan,” he admitted, “But yeah, I actually - oh no - I got called out for a rescue op that I should probably go!” he said as if he finally remembered that he was requested.
Sometimes, the nerd could be so dumb, but Katsuki didn’t really care. It was even a bit cute.
“Go out there nerd,” Katsuki said with a smile, trying to pass himself off as not having a mini-mental breakdown. They could always talk about his apparent soulmark later, Deku doing his job was more important.
The other hero looked hesitant, but eventually nodded, squeezing Katsuki’s bicep before he left.
After taking a moment to regain his head and understand just what was going on, he started making his way back to Kirishima’s office.
He couldn’t believe it really, that he’d have a soulmate, an alive one. The mark he had currently meant they were very much alive and well.
Did that just mean that they never got in trouble ever? What kind of kid doesn’t get into some sort of trouble or danger growing up? And god - they’re probably going to be furious with him once they meet him, all those times Katsuki was in danger.
He shook the feeling off his shoulders, letting out a breath.
Truth was, Katsuki never had to meet his soulmate if he didn’t want to, he wouldn’t ever have to find them. He would rather leave it a mystery forever. At least then he would be able to stay near his best friend and work through the mess in his head before adding another person to it.
Katsuki sighed as he finally made it to Kirishima’s office, bursting in without any sort of announcement, which was the right call because apparently, Kirishima wasn’t even in his office.
He sat down in the cushiony chair on the other side of the desk, spinning around in it and trying to calm his breathing as he waited for his friend.
Fuck, he hated waiting, and he always sucked at it.
As soon as the door opened, he sprung up from the chair as he looked at his other best friend, a relieved sigh coming from him.
If Kirishima wasn’t looking worried before, he definitely was now, rushing over to Katsuki and steadying him on his feet.
“Dude?” he questioned gently, looking at his friend. “You look like someone just died, is everything okay?” Kirishima asked.
When faced with the question, Katsuki merely stared at his friend, gaping like a fish a bit. How was he going to get this out? How was he going to tell someone that he had a soulmate when he could barely admit that fact to himself?
He moved back to the chair and sat down again, taking a breath.
“Kats, you’re really scaring me here,” Kirishima laughed nervously as he leaned down next to the chair, keeping his focus on Katsuki.
The blond closed his eyes and took a breath, trying to make sure that he’d have enough air to get the next part out.
“I have to tell you something.”