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Growing up, sharing is a concept Tay wasn't familiar with.
He was an only child, and as one, he never had to deal with time allotment for toys or breaking a cookie into parts because he has everything all to himself.
His reality becomes vivid when he starts going to school, a child with bright eyes and a wide grin. Being the teacher's son has its advantages. He didn't have to worry about making friends. Everyone wanted to play with him, talk to him, and go to his house. He never had to deal with borrowing pencils or being left out because everything was handed to him, everyone wanted to be his friend.
High school was no different. He was popular among his peers, a student council President, had consistent honors and graduated valedictorian. He's had no problem fitting in on a crowd and stealing the spotlight. He never had to deal with bullies or breakups because everybody wanted to be in on his social graces, everyone followed him wherever he goes.
As a college student, Tay didn't particularly love his major. He didn't like the university he was forced to study at and he found himself more homesick than usual. He didn't like the people in his dorms, especially his weird, noisy roommate. And then when it was junior year, he came across an apartment looking for another boarder. The current tenant was a senior from where he studied. There were two separate bedrooms which means he got to have a space for himself. He lived there until graduation, and even now that he's already working.
Tay never had to deal with anything hard in his life until he met Off.
And he was so attracted to him, he didn't even know how and when it started
Off was from the Fine Arts department and they never crossed paths, he's never even heard of him until he caught a glimpse of his ID. The only time they would interact was when they were at home and outside of that, they were strangers.
He wasn't much of a nuisance when it comes to house chores. Off did his part and even more, because Tay didn't know how to cook. He was comfortable around him, and Off seems to be likewise. He suggested dropping all the formalities and just calling him Off despite being older.
Off was nice. He's got a great sense of humor and is very appealing to the eye. It wasn't that hard to fall for him. Although, Tay remembers it being an incident of voyeurism that sealed the deal.
It was his first day of work and he had just gotten home. Immediately, he would go to take a shower downstairs because the water was warm there but he stopped in his tracks when he spots the door of Off's room open, and he was curious for sure because he had never once seen what it was like inside. It's not as though Off had seen his room but it was more of their own secret. Something they keep to themselves without each other knowing. He took a peek because he had the chance.
Off was chuckling over the phone, talking to someone. There was movement on his lower body and when his eyes traced the lines from his upper arm down to his hand missing through the blankets, he had an understanding of what was happening. His roommate was jerking off, eyes shut and mind focused on what the person on the other line was telling him. Tay knew he should've minded his business, and proceeded to go downstairs and do what he was supposed to do but when Off parts his lips to say, "I'll fuck your ass so good when I see you, baby." he was irredeemable.
Tay wasn't aware of Off being in a relationship, more so that it was with a guy. He's never seen him bring someone home, although he sometimes did tell him he'll be out on a date.
It didn't end there. Tay thinks it was wrong for him to pine over someone already cuffed but he still found himself drawn to Off. There was something about his smile that was intoxicating, something about the way he lets his sweatpants hang low on his hips, shirt on his shoulders whenever he works out in the living room, nodding to greet him.
Tay was fucked. He did try to will himself into getting away, getting out before he could not be saved. He opened the door and was met with another torment he's not sure if he can let in.
"Is Off inside?" His bloodshot eyes and trembling lips were something Tay thinks he would see himself with in the future.
"Who are you?" He asked politely, not really wanting to know the answer.
"My name is Gun Atthaphan, I'm his boyfriend."
And he was inside before he could even tell him off upon seeing his boyfriend. The door and his mouth were left hanging open and only the sound of him kissing his forehead and a few consolations Tay didn't want to hear were audible.
///////
Gun had a fight with his Dad, that's how it was. After a few days, Tay was sure he would be gone yet it's been a month and he practically lived with them.
There was nothing irksome about Gun, only the fact that Off had his eyes on him and Tay was sick of it. Although he may be a little sly as there was an instance where he caught them making out in the kitchen and Gun saw him beforehand, he smirked at him before pushing Off away, acting surprised. Off looked back at him apologetically and he only smiled.
They decided to divide the rent among the three of them now, with Gun possibly permanently living in Off's room. He's got no choice but to agree because it wasn't his apartment in the first place. He was only a tenant.
The problem was Gun seems to be always wanting to involve him—not blatantly but indirectly—in whatever he and Off do. Be it a trip to the mall or buying groceries. It's like they function as three and Tay wants none of that. If anything, he liked how things were before. Only stealing glances from Off and hoping he'd look back. Not the unwanted attention he was being given all because of Gun.
Tay was, you could say, fed up. Gun was a fox he never wanted to deal with. It didn't help that every time they fuck in their respective bedroom, he could hear them clearly in his. Tay was sick of it, but he was also jealous. And he tried so hard to not let his hands roam over his body, to not let it be trapped under his shirt and inside his boxers, but it doesn't work. In the end, he always makes the mistake to let a finger tweak a nipple, a thumb roll over the tip of his cock, and a moan at the end of his tongue. Tay always had Off in his mind.
"Right there, fuck. Your dick feels so good, papii."
And Gun was also always in the picture.
He was trying to get in touch with his long-overdue lesson plan when he hears them again. A loud thud and the creaking of the bed's headboard. He shifts in his seat on the swivel chair, feeling hot and uncomfortable.
"You like it so much, don't you?" It was Off's voice, a sharp tone with edges in every word. It's as though the heavens are punishing him for when he closes his eyes, all the buttons of his shirt pop open, and he sees him, hands all over his chest as if he was real.
"No, please," Gun cries out, high-pitched and his pleading turns into a moan, a whimper of need mixed with greed for Off to continue whatever it was he was doing to him, a contradiction to his answers.
Tay can consider himself as having a wild imagination. Yet it was harder to picture them together this time. All silhouettes and voices too far away to reach, but with a feeling so uncanny, so strong. The hand on his cock times its movement on the sound of skin slapping against skin from the other room.
"What are you pleading for, then? You've got your tight little hole filled, ahhh fuck. You just can't be satisfied?"
Tay goes faster this time. He doesn't mind if he was out of rhythm or out of beat. He just needs to come.
"Don't hide those noises from me, baby. Or I'll stop fucking you and just come all over your clothes."
He was surprised when his mouth involuntarily releases a groan, panting as he strokes himself intensely, eyes shut tight. He doesn't even hear Off anymore. It's just his breathlessness occupying his senses.
"But you'd like that, don't you? You'd like parading yourself in front of Tay, wouldn't you?"
He opens his eyes instantly at that, come trickling down his hand and mouth open wide.
"I bet you'd want him to be here watching you writhe under me. I bet you get excited thinking about me fucking him too, isn't that so?"
God. Fuck. What was happening in there?
He lets his still stiff cock rest on his stomach, breathing labored and uneasy. Off wants to fuck him. Does he?
That was all he decided to hear before he starts cleaning himself up, letting the tap water from his bathroom run so he can stop listening over his roommates fucking while talking about him. Or thinking about fucking him.
///////
On that fateful Friday night, Off was working overtime in the atelier, and he was left with Gun watching cringy soap operas on a separate couch.
"P’Tay,” he calls. It's not like they haven't talked with each other alone but somehow he still feels awkward whenever he hears him speak to him.
He turns his head from the television to him, humming and raising his eyebrows.
"Last night..." He tenses at the mention of yesterday, where he was manifestly listening to them fuck and even touched himself through it.
"Yeah?" He clears his throat, head going back to face the television again.
"Well, we were supposed to invite you out for dinner but you weren't home yet. Sorry for not bringing takeouts," he smiles embarrassingly, tucking auburn strands behind his ear. Gun looks princely, pretty high nose and a cupid's bow, and he’s relatively short in height. He looks nothing like him and he wonders if this was exactly Off's type, because he remembers seeing a girl as his wallpaper before. Short hair with the same description, the same angelic smile.
The first time he saw Gun at his front door and he introduces himself as Off's boyfriend, he comes to the conclusion that maybe Off liked the more feminine type. Someone with soft and delicate features in contrast with the stark machismo he was emanating. The first time he heard them, he learns that he's got an obsession. He fancies the way Off's voice rings in his ears whenever he speaks, whenever he moans.
Funny enough, he found himself liking Gun's part in it. Because deep inside, he knows he's the only one who brings out that side of Off. And he wonders if someday, it'll be him.
"It's fine, Gun. I wouldn't have come anyway considering it was your date. It's no fun being the third wheel,” he chuckles, biting his lip after Gun didn't join him.
"It's not a date, though. It's just a little family dinner since we're all living in the same house. Next time, you should really come."
He nods at that, giving the subject up.
Gun looks at the clock to check the time and he tuts, "P’Off's still out yet. What do you want to eat?"
"Oh, I'm still not hungry."
"Come on, I'll cook," he grins at him proudly, sure that he can't refuse him with that smile and so he tells him anything will be fine. He helps him work in the kitchen and they eat in peace with only a few chatters, mostly about their common denominator: Off.
Gun did tell him he would like to get to know him more. Tay wasn't sure if there was a threat behind it or just pure curiosity. He feels as though he was being insincere. What with those foxy eyes and lips lifting to the side. Tay senses that he's been figured out. Gun knows all about him already, yet he still asks. That's how shrewd he was.
He wakes up at an unfortunate time craving milk and the cookies one of his students bought for him that he didn't get to eat last night. It was total darkness downstairs and Tay scolds himself for not bringing his phone to act as a flashlight. The light coming from the fridge when he opens to get what he needs was enough for him to be aware of his surroundings, like where to sit, for example.
There was already a cup on the table so he uses it and eats as silently as possible. His roommates wouldn't hear him but he still wants to be careful, since he didn't like being the center of attention. Gun would have to ask so many questions.
Once he was done, he goes towards the sink to clean any evidence that he was up that midnight, turning the tap slowly and searching for the sponge. He washes the cup he used for drinking too. He was drying out his hand when he hears the front door opens, and he halts at that. It couldn't be… there's no way.
Off just got home.
There were no lights to confirm that it was really him. But Tay recognizes him from his steps or the way he hangs his coat on the rack. This time, it was Off's scent, looming over him like a felon, trapping him on the sink with both arms on his side.
Off buries his nose in the crook of his neck, nuzzling on it. There was a hum of approval at the back of his throat and his knees weaken at that. Luckily he was caged, or else he would be down on the floor.
Tay wants to push him away, and tell him he was mistaken. He wonders if he was drunk to not notice it. Because he's not Gun. He's not his boyfriend, and yet when Off's fingers were on his jaw, tilting it to face him and sealing his lips with a kiss, he doesn't listen to his instincts. He lets himself get lost in the heat of his mouth, urging him that it's alright.
The man in front of him doesn't taste anything like alcohol, he swallows every ounce of sanity his tongue could reach.
Off lifts him up from the ground, hands on his ass, and he hooks his legs around his hips without breaking the kiss. This was wrong. He lost the perfect time to stop him from going any further but kissing him only happens in the deepest parts of his dreams. It was real this time. All he needs to do is not make a sound. Off wouldn't know.
His lips travel down to his neck, lapping at it with his tongue, drawing imperfect circles that make him curl his toes, buckling his hips. Off's crotch presses onto him and he opens his eyes in surprise, a moan slipping from his mouth. He's caught.
"Tay..." As if on cue, the lights turn on, revealing Gun in a silk robe, rubbing his eyes. Tay scrambles to get himself off of his roommate, finally pushing him away and jumping from the table. He fixes his clothes and his hair, genuinely hoping Off hadn't left any marks on him. Only then did the realization of his actions sink in. He made out with his roommate's boyfriend.
"Oh, you're back." Gun opens one eye and smiles, only nodding at him.
"Yeah, sorry. I didn't want to wake you up." Off scrubs his face with his palm then scratches the back of his neck, lips lifting to the side.
Gun faces him, raising an eyebrow. He immediately wants out. He tries to gather his composure and tell him an excuse but he's left gaping when he says, "Continue what you were doing a while ago. I want to watch."
He crosses his arms and leans on the wall, smirking at him. His eyes dart towards Off's direction, stunned and speechless.
Off walks past him though, collecting Gun and shaking his head. "You should've gone down earlier. Now, you've ruined the mood and I want to sleep." The younger of the two reluctantly lets himself be dragged upstairs.
Tay catches Off looking back at him, and he bites his lip before closing their bedroom door. He falls to the ground and smacks his head on his knees.
What the fuck was wrong with them?
///////
Tay couldn't go back to sleep. He keeps on thinking about Off's lips on his with Gun's eyes behind them. Was he embarrassed to find out he knew? Gun knew? Off knew? Was he ashamed that he kissed someone else's boyfriend, that he let himself be kissed? He gives away too much, happy to be receiving just a little bit.
He doesn't know how to face them come morning so he decides to leave early and ditch their usual trifecta breakfast and eats at the school cafeteria instead. He blends in well as a college student when he followed in his mother's footsteps to become a professor too.
He frowns when he receives a text from Gun asking if he has already eaten and why he left early. He replies after a minute with yes, blatantly avoiding the other question. He goes through most of his day not thinking about it until it was time for him to go home. Since it was Saturday, he only had classes till lunch.
Gun was already anticipating his return, sitting cozily on the couch with his feet on the mini table. He puts them down when their eyes meet. Tay removes his shoes and nods at him, not knowing exactly what to say. Gun stands up and walks toward him. His breath hitches when they were face to face, remembering how his boyfriend's lips tasted on his tongue. He blushes and looks away.
"You don't have work today, Gun?" He starts.
Gun shakes his head. He doesn't speak. He dreads seeing his reaction once he apologizes, he wonders if Gun was only waiting for him to do it. To tell him straight up that he's a snake and that he seizes every chance he gets to be alone with Off and take advantage of him. Even though, the case was the opposite since Off was the one to kiss him first.
"I'm sorry for what happened last night," he fakes a cough. "I mean, a while ago."
"Don't you think it was pretty hot?" He snaps his head and faces him, shock painting his face.
"L-like the weather?" Gun snorts, rolling his eyes at him.
"No, you kissing my boyfriend. I think it's hot. Don't you want to do it again?" Before he could answer, Off comes running down the stairs, surprised to see him home too early. He kisses Gun's cheek and asks what they were talking about.
"I was just asking Tay here how—"
"Ah, who wants to eat lunch?" He deflects easily, averting Off's gaze on him and heading straight to the kitchen. He doesn't understand why he seems to act as if nothing happened last night. Maybe he was actually out of it. If this was how Off wants it to be, then he can also do that. It's more favorable for him. He doesn't like confrontations anyway.
Their lunch was void of noise save from a few utensils clatter. Gun was in front of him with Off in the middle of them. He prefers not to break the silence until Off speaks.
"We ran out of canned goods. Should we buy groceries?" Before Gun came barging into their house, Off used to say this to him. But now he had his back on him, telling his boyfriend directly as if he was the cat joining in, a visitor.
"How about you go with Tay? I have to send stuff to my boss and figure out how to change the default layouts." He laughs and then gestures for Off to give him a glass. He drinks from it.
Tay wants to object but he was caught up yet again, trapped when Off meets his eyes. Waiting for his answer and he nearly hears the ticking of the clock when he tilts his head and cocks a brow.
"Should we?"
"Yeah, fine by me."
He finishes his water to ease the tension he was feeling, hoping Off was good enough in dodging the topic of last night's kiss.
///////
They went to get groceries after Off came home from work, not even bothering to change clothes, still in his white button-down shirt with sleeves rolled up to his elbows and dark brown slacks.
He makes him push the cart as he scans the list Gun had written. He couldn't help but notice how much they look like a couple buying things for their home, and he wonders if he'll ever get over Off or why he can't. He still blushes at the thought though, thankful that Off's attention was not on his else he couldn't blame the heat as to why he was red.
"Hey, sorry for kissing you last night," Off blurts out while they were on their way to the counter, lining up on the pushcart lane.
He has no idea how to answer it, just a few incoherent words forming at the back of his throat. "It's alright. Sorry for not pushing you away though, you were clearly out of it." He tries to sound confident by shrugging but he stutters at the end of his sentence and Off chuckles at that.
"Who says I was?" He looks back at him, seeing a smirk form on his lips. He did it on purpose. But why?
Off moves towards him, closing a little bit of their distance until he feels like he was out of breath, holding it in so Off wouldn't know how much it affects him. How much he affects him.
"Did you like it? I wish you did," he leans in to whisper, "'cause I want to keep kissing you."
He doesn't let him finish sinking it in, pushing the cart near the counter and smiling at the cashier as if nothing happened. At least not between the two of them.
He was quiet all the way back, not uncomfortable but more baffled. There's no way the couple isn't playing with him. They must've seen him, or caught him staring at Off like a dumbstruck puppy too devoid of affection. They must've planned to make a fool out of him. They're doing a good job because it's working. He would've only been distraught if it was Gun doing the talking but Off did. And he realized how weak he was when it comes to him. One smile. One smirk. One fucking whisper.
He steals another glance when Off was removing his shoes, staring at the veins on his arms and the way his Adam's apple bobs when he takes a gulp. Off seems to take note of the eyes that bore upon him, he lifts his head and catches him, running his tongue on his lower lip and straightening his posture. They head upstairs together, with him following behind.
Once they were face to face with their respective rooms and Tay was ready to turn the knob and hide, Off says, "Want to go inside?"
He stretches his arms out to reach for him, and as though he was entranced, he lets himself be pulled inside the Devil's lair.
Nothing had prepared him for the situation in the room. He inhales sharply at the sight of a naked Gun kneeling on the floor, his hands were cuffed with leather and a chain connected to the collar on his neck, a silk blindfold covering his eyes. He wants to stop himself from looking at him until he notices a black sock covering his cock, stiff and heavy on top of his stomach. How long has he been in this position? They were out for hours.
"Papii?" He shifts, craning his neck even though he probably wouldn't see. "Is that you? You're back, right?"
His eyes fix on Off pursing his lips, satisfied at Gun's immediate reaction the minute he hears the door open. He puts his index finger over his lips, asking him to be quiet and that's all he ever did. He watches in silence.
Off sits on the edge of the bed, his knees leveling with Gun's face and he runs the back of his palm over his face, soothing him. He's got a full view of what was happening, or what was about to.
"Did you touch yourself while I was away?" His voice is different this time, roughened, more hoarse. It seems as though he's been doing this for a while now seeing how fast he changes his stance.
Gun shakes his head in earnest, whimpering at every hint of skin Off was giving him, every touch, even with the tip of his fingers. "No."
"Really? You're not lying, right?" Off reaches down to his sock-covered cock, giving it a stroke. Gun visibly shudders, releasing a high-pitched moan Tay was so familiar with.
"You waited for me for hours and yet you're still hard." He laughs wickedly and it echoes throughout the room, Tay shivers to himself, feeling the hair of his skin standing up.
"Must be my sock doing the work. You're so filthy, baby," he whispers the last words to his ears but still enough for him to hear, ending it with a bite on Gun's earlobe, a nibble going down on his neck. He notices how his hand has already disappeared between them and realized that he was giving him a handjob through the article of clothing that's covering him. Off does this while sucking eagerly on Gun's neck, his jaw clenching as if he was angry, going at it with fervent until Gun screams, and Off removes his hand on him, removes himself from him. He gets a tissue on the bedside table to wipe his hand, shaking his head like he was disappointed.
"I didn't tell you to come."
Gun freezes, whining when Off removes the soiled sock over his cock without care. Tay stares at the come dripping off of it when Off squeezes it, letting it trickle down on Gun's thighs, messing him up.
"Open your mouth." Gun obeys, licking every inch of Off's fingers covered with his own come like it was nothing, like he was enjoying it.
"I thought about punishing you for coming without my permission, but I'm in a good mood today." Off lifts his eyes and stares at him, grinning, "And you've waited for too long. I should just let you suck me off and get it over with, yeah?"
Gun nods. Off doesn't seem to be pleased with his answer, he tuts, "Why don't you beg for it?"
"Please," his voice breaks.
"Please what?"
"I want your cock in my mouth."
Off traces his lips with his thumb, urging him to suck on it. "There we go."
Tay doesn't know if he was still welcome but he finds himself rooted from where he was standing when Off unbuckles his belt and unzips his slacks, letting it fall over his thighs with his boxers, his cock springing free and he strokes it before slapping Gun's face with it. He couldn't stop staring.
He watches as he pushes his length slowly inside Gun's mouth, how his lips stretch and he wonders if he can take it. Off doesn't seem to mind, his hand was gripping Gun's hair, pulling him to meet him. He makes a sound of discomfort at the back of his throat but Off only groans, growing impatient.
"Come on, you can do better than that. You've taken me all in before, baby. You play too fucking much." And he fucks his mouth like it would rip him, getting off with the muffled moans Gun makes, his cuffed hand clenching on top of his dirtied thighs. Tay notices that he was hard again. He doesn't question it. It was only fair. He was getting hard too.
He keeps his eyes fixed on Off. The way his head tips back as he thrusts deeper into Gun's throat, his thumb pressing on the hollow of his cheek and his lips parted with only blasphemy coming off of them. He releases a grumble bordering on a growl when he says he was close, removing his cock from Gun's mouth with a string of saliva still connecting them.
"Show me your hands."
Gun holds out both of his hands, his palms on display as if he were asking for graces. Off closes his fist on his cock, thrusting in it at a brutal pace until he spurts his come on Gun's hand. "Now, lap it up," he says, breathing ragged and chest heaving.
Gun doesn't take much time before his tongue was running over his hand, licking his palms clean like an obedient dog. Tay wants to close his eyes and touch himself. This was too much. Seeing the object of his fantasy...the objects. The subjects. He's going insane.
"So good, baby." Off doesn't fix his current state, instead, he was looking in his direction, "He's so good, right?" He asks him. Tay wants to croak out a yes but he only nods.
"Who… who is it?" Gun was alarmed to realize someone had been watching him, them. He moves his head from side to side like it would help but Off holds him still, lips pressing on the side of his head before untying the blindfold covering his eyes, letting it fall off his face and on the floor. He doesn't hide the shock in his expression when his presence was finally known.
"Ah, don't act too coy. I bet you were putting on a good show because you knew Tay was watching you the whole time." Off keeps on kissing his temple, eyes closed with fondness. Gun has a steady gaze on him, the proud smile he was so caught up with showing on his lips.
"P’Tay," he calls. Off opens his eyes to stare at him too.
"Hmm?" He answers, knees trembling even before he could walk towards them when Off gestures for him to come closer.
"Why don't you kiss me?"
And right then, Tay realized he wasn’t just fucked. He was double-fucked.