Chapter Text
TW: sh
It had been weeks since Splinter made him the leader. 3 weeks of absolute suffering. Leonardo had hated every minute of it. Every mission that his brothers had been with him on had been… how to put this nicely…. hell. It had been an absolute total hell.
“I knew you were attention seeking, but taking this away from him? Never knew you’d stoop so low.”
Ouch.
“I know you and Raph fight a lot, but was taking this from him really necessary? Its not cool bro”
I never wanted this
“Do you really think you can handle this responsibly? Putting your brothers at risk takes a lot that i dont think you have!”-
No
He wasn’t ready to relive that fight.
Not yet.
He needed an escape. Some way to feel normal. All he had felt in these weeks were numbness anger and sadness.
“I need water”
Leo got out of his comfortably built pillow fort on his bed. Well, it couldn’t really be called a fort. Its really more of a nest. A nest with pillows blankets some food. A water bottle, and hey. Who needed to know about the razors in his bedside table. Comfortably in reach.
Stumbling out of the doorway, Leo picked up the water bottle and headed for the kitchen. He’s lightheaded. His mouth is dry. Everything hurts. When was the last time he’d eaten? His snacks sat untouched in his bed. He hasn’t felt like eating. Not while his brothers hated him. Not when he hated himself. He’s not worthy of food anyway.
He’s not worthy
He didn’t feel worthy anyway.
Worthy of anything really.
Why was he the leader again?
He went towards the sink and filled his water bottle.
He stopped…
He stopped thinking.
.
.
.
Why couldn’t he think?
The water was running. Overflowing the bottle.
Leo didn’t move.
He didn’t know what he was doing
He cant think
Cant think
He cant.
He cant do anything really.
“Bro?”
He jumped back. He jumped back straight onto his little brother actually. Spilling the contents of the bottle all over Mikey.
Wow
He really does find a way to mess up literally anything. Even something as simple as getting some fucking water.
Hey when did Mikey get here?
“Hey?? Leo you okay? You’ve been standing at the sink for 10 minutes… and you spilt all the water on me.”
Oh
Ten minutes huh?
At least he could open his mouth now.
“MIKEY!!!! Hey bro didnt see you there haha. Sorry guess I zoned out. Ill get outta your way. If you need me I’ll be in my room.”
He turned to leave
He was still angry
He was still upset
At the fight
That was one hell of a fight
Who was he thinking about? Mikey or himself?
He doesn’t know.
He turned to leave, except someone caught his wrist.
Ouch
“Leo… its been two weeks. We haven’t seen you in two weeks. You’ve been in your room that whole time!” Mikey looked…
Concerned?
Huh
Weird
Leo smiled. Why? He didn’t know. Habit?
“And yet none of you were concerned enough to knock.”
Wow where did that come from Leo. Stupid
Stupid
STUPID
Mikey looked surprised. Which was understandable. Because Leo rarely ever snapped at his younger brother.
“Leo. I-“
Mikey stopped and looked down. Opening his mouth as if he had something to say, but closing it before any sound escaped. He looked at his hand. He looked back up. Was he scared? Why would he be-
Blood.
He had blood on his hand
How had he not noticed his brother was injured???
Leo immediately snapped into big brother mode and closed the small distance between them.
“MIKEY! Ohmygod what happened? Are you alright? You need to go to Donnie right now if you’re hurt-“
“Its yours”
.
.
.
.
.
What?
Oh
O h
O h n o
Mikey had grabbed his wrist to stop him from leaving.
Leo looked down at his wrist
Blood.
“…leo? whats going on man?”
Leo couldn’t think
“Leo I know we had a fight, but you can still talk to us… we do care about you, were brothers!”
Leo couldn’t breath actually.
Oh hey when did he take a step back
Mikey stared “Leo?”
He could breath again
He was actually breathing too much now
Oh he was hyperventilating
He was having an anxiety attack
Great
Just what he needed today actually
Leo opened his mouth. He tried to talk in between his jagged breaths “Mikey. Im ok. Im ok I promise you I am ok. Its nothing to worry about.”
“Leo that looked bad-“
“Im fine Michael-“
“That didnt look fine leo. Please tell me that wasn’t-“
Leo didnt let him finish his sentence because leo ran
Leo ran fast
Straight into his room
Leo locked the door.
Leo couldn’t think
Why can he never think
What made him think he’d be fit to lead the guys if he couldn’t even think.
He looked at his bedside table
“Not now”
He looked at his odachi and walked over. He picked it up and slashed the air in one motion.
He stepped through the portal
He had to escape.
Escape.