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Believe it or not he still comes around, but not in the ways you'd expect.
He's subtle about it. He still cares about you, but he wants to make sure you're okay. He wants to distance himself from you because he wants to keep you safe.
It sucks. You miss his face. You miss his voice you miss his -
You're even having dreams about him and that fateful day you all parted twelve years ago. Sadly Emma wasn't there anymore, having passed at the hands of Kisaki, but you dragged Hina along to the last Toman meeting in her place, both of you placing items in the Tokyo Manji Gang's time capsule. With every ounce of admiration and childlike wonder in your heart, you placed a love letter in the time capsule... addressed to none other than Manjiro Sano.
'Mikey!!!!' You remember writing with just as many, if not more exclamation points, as you sit up in bed, still very much half-asleep, running fingers through your messy hair. You were definitely more energetic then, but everyone in Toman thought it was endearing. 'I'm writing this letter to see what our lives are like twelve years from now! I'm sure you see right through me now, but I have the world's biggest crush on you. I'm just not brave enough to confess to you. I want to speak up, I really do, but I don't want to intervene in your plans. Regardless of where Toman is, there's no place for someone like me at the famed invicible Mikey's side. Not now at least. But maybe when we're older. When we're grown-ups...' That's the gist of it at least. You don't remember your exact words, but you do remember that sense of longing. That sense of admiration. That insecurity.
You still feel all of these things today.
And you hope that reading that letter you wrote to yourself, twelve years in the future, in its entirety will give you the closure you desire. That's why you're going to the opening of the time capsule today. That and you need to save face and be there for everyone regardless of how you're feeling.
All things considered you're doing fairly well for yourself. Like Hinata, you've become a school teacher. You work at the very same school as her teaching preschoolers. It's fulfilling enough for you, but you imagine she had something to do with you getting the job.
You shake it off as you get ready, showering and dressing in a way that's reminiscent of the way that you dressed then. Even though you weren't an official member, you asked Mitsuya to make you a Toman jacket regardless. It doesn't have all of the bells and whistles and tell-tale signs of being in a gang, but it has the gang's Manji symbol and name draped on it. You still have it.
It doesn't fit anymore, but it's still a comfort item for you.You giggle and drape it over your shoulder, rushing out of your apartment to ensure that you aren't late to the ceremony.
Everyone at the ceremony greets you with excitement and fondness. They're happy to see you. You're given a large hug by Pah-chin, of whom recently had a wedding. Mitsuya comments on your jacket and the condition its in, suggesting that he needs to take time to sew you another. The various comments and pleasantries are endearing, but when it comes to sharing what you've put in the time capsule with the rest of the group, you freeze up. You were obvious enough. Even Takemichi knew your feelings for Mikey. No. That isn't why this is a struggle.
You were supposed to read this letter to Mikey directly.
As a teenager, you imagined a future with him. A life with him. A life that's been squandered because he's gone into hiding.
This letter wasn't meant to be a confessional but a fond memory of the sheer puppy love you experienced during middle school. A fond memory you wanted to share with him.
You can't read it aloud. You can't share it with the others in the group, opting to crumble it up and toss it aside. Whenever everyone looks at you, you shake it off, letting out a defensive, frustrated breath. "It's stupid really." It isn't. But you dismiss your feelings as the group moves to the next item. The rest of the reunion is anxiety-inducing for you, but you try your best to be supportive. You get the letter out of your head and listen to the various items everyone else deposited. Chifuyu's plane magazine, for instance. It's all endearing. At least you aren't the only one who didn't fulfill your childhood dreams.
As everyone finishes with their fond memories, they part.
That's it? That's all that's going to come of this nostalgia?
You're frustrated, but you can't allow your frustration to be brought to light. Today isn't just about you, after all.
Whenever everyone else leaves, you finally grab the discarded letter in your hands and lean against a tree. You become overwhelmed, tearing up as you read the words that you wrote at age 15. Your tears paint the piece of notebook paper, watching as the words on the page become hard to read, fading and blurring against the page. You fix what you can and put the piece of paper aside, staring at the site of the time capsule.
This goes on for some time until you're met with rain -- no surprise given the time of year. It is June after all and the rainy season.
Oh well. It's time for you to move on. You grab the jacket from so many years ago and place it under the tree you were sitting under, placing the letter on top. This will serve as a sort of a memorial, you decide. With one quick goodbye, you walk away, not turning back once.
It's time to move on.
Time to move on.
So much for that, you think to yourself, opting to visit a taiyaki stand.
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"Are you sure about this boss?" He was.
As leader of Japan's number one crime syndicate, Manjiro Sano always convinced himself that he was sure of himself, assuring himself that the choices he was making were the right ones.
Believe it or not a number of his decisions were based around his old life -- protecting those he once held dear. The reason he isolated himself was to ensure that everyone remained safe. While he was around Toman, he lost so many people that he cared about. Mikey wasn't going to let that happen again.
He needed to keep his distance, but like others, he also needed closure.
For a split second, a top a skyscraper hiding his organization's headquarters, he thought it might be better to leave it be, to allow the others to meet up and not meet with them, but his heart got the best of him. That desire for closure motivated him to pay everyone a visit.
Despite what others thought, Mikey made it that day. Keeping himself hidden, he listened to the fond memories of his old teammates, going so far as to smile. Everyone was getting along fine without him. Everyone was living their lives as intended.
Everyone except for you.
You didn't share your object with the others, almost dismissing yourself completely.
The others rubbed it off, but Mikey knew that look in your eyes all too well. That look of sadness and longing. You were hiding something. Even after everyone else left, you stayed behind. He stayed behind with you, still keeping his distance, but watching your reactions regardless.
Your reactions were hard to watch. Your tears. Your anxieties. There wasn't much left to Mikey's heart, but you caused him to focus on it, that bursting, beating sensation in his chest. He longed to reach out to you, to comfort you, but he couldn't. He couldn't pull you into his world.
When you finally left, he made his way to the tree you vacated and grabbed the letter you left behind, his eyes scanning across the page.
It was so difficult to read.
Why did you feel this way for him? Why were you holding onto feelings that you had in middle school?
Although he teased you so many years ago, he felt similarly. He thought the admiration you felt for him was adorable.
You were adorable.
And still are.
Against his best interest, Mikey took the crumbling piece of paper and jacket in his fingers. He needed to do you this favor at least. It's a favor to himself as well.
Though unable to show his face, he wanted to greet you, to ensure that you hold onto the fondness that you felt for him so many years ago.
And he followed you, finding you in a spot reminiscent of both of your childhoods. His favorite taiyaki stand.
"Sorry to bother you, but this is yours. Isn't it?"
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As you nibble on the fish-shaped pastry, your thoughts are interrupted by a stranger tapping on your shoulder. You turn around and face the stranger. His head hangs low, hidden behind a black sweatshirt hood. He doesn't make eye contact with you, but he's holding something in front of him.
"I think you've got the wrong person-" Then you take a good look at the items he's holding in front of him, your eyes widening. "I - these are mine but -" Finally, he looks up, making eye contact with you.
Those eyes.
You gasp, your hand finding your mouth, covering it, as you're completely shocked.
"For what it's worth," he says, in a voice shrouded in longing, "I felt the same way about you." He pushes the items into your arms and he's immediately gone.
Mikey...
So much for closure.